Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
Struggle meals. A fundamental part of life. If you haven't had a struggle meal before, who even are you, bro? You're missing out. If your family had a shit ton of motion, Lambos in the driveway, house in the hills, you probably have no idea what a struggle meal is. So let me tell you about the absolute blessing...
of struggle meals. Now the definition of a struggle meal, it's either a combination of food items or just a food item in particular that comes in clutch when you really got no food in the crib. You open the fridge, all you see is tumbleweeds and goddamn cobwebs forming. In said scenario, you would whip up a struggle meal. And now I picked some of the best and some of the worst in my opinion.
And we're gonna rank them today. We're gonna start with one of my favorites. Dry cereal. I know a lot of you might flame me in the comments, dude, but I fuck with dry cereal. I'm not gonna lie. Whenever there's no milk in the crib, it just comes in so clutch. And plus, cereal just gets soggy as hell in the milk anyways. Dry cereal is one of my favorite struggle meals because I'm not exactly a chef in the making, bro. Like, I would fuck up microwave mac and cheese. I actually did one time. I almost burnt my house down with a-
Mac and cheese. Like, how does that even work? It's literally so easy. There is no way I can fuck it up unless I spill the cereal all over the floor. Birdie, what did you do? You done spilled the Cap'n Crush all over the floor. What do you mean nothing? And if I do spill the cereal the next morning, I wake up to the sounds of a premium leather belt whipping. No, I'm just kidding. My parents probably would have just yelled at me or something. But of course, as a fetus back in the day, I had every sugary cereal imaginable.
I had Cocoa Puffs, Fruit Loops, Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and Captain Crunch. Bro, that was my lineup. But so far, we're off to a good start. This one's getting an S tier from me. Next up, we got ramen. Now, me personally, I don't really fuck with ramen. I don't know, man. Sometimes ramen is just way too salty. And sometimes it's way too goddamn spicy for me, too. I'm a bitch when it comes to spicy foods. Like, if I ate one of those extremely spicy ramen packets, yeah, my ass would be dead on the fucking floor.
floor. But yeah, bro, ramen's going to get a C tier from me. Next up, we got hot dogs on white bread or also known as hood dogs. If you've never had these, you're missing out. Back in the day when my mom would make me hot dogs for lunch, we were always out of hot dog buns. We like never had them in the house, bro. So what would she do? Piece of white bread, put the hot
dog in it roll it up boom there you go you got a hood dog don't sleep on it bro that shit's heat you could do it in a burger bun or anything besides a hot dog bun honestly i've seen some people put that shit on a tortilla and tell me not bro that shit sounds fucking delicious all right pause pause you don't know how many times hood dogs have come and clutch in my life now i'm sure you guys watching this video can agree that they are the saving grace for many but nah bro when you gotta eat that shit on stale bread oh my god that shit's fucking trash
But for me, the hood dog is getting an S tier, alright? Nothing can beat that combo. Leftovers. Oh my god, they are so clutch. Whenever I have nothing to eat for lunch, there is nothing in the crib. I'd just be tossing leftovers in the microwave. Although leftovers do not hit the same as the actual meal, of course not. They still be hitting sometimes, I'ma be real. But one night, I was with one of my homies and my brother, the duck. We were so fucking hungry, and we had no idea what to eat.
We open the fridge and there they are the fucking leftovers. How clutch is that? Now my friend taught me what is known as the hood trick with the microwave where basically you do not let that fucking microwave beep go off or else it's waking up your entire family. If they hear that beep at three in the morning, I will never see the light of day again. I'm a sauce leftovers in A tier. They are pretty clutch, but obviously it's just not as good as the actual meal itself. Pop tarts or any other pastries.
Now, when I was a kid, sometimes I really would not have time to eat breakfast. And I would just have to take a Pop-Tart with me to the bus stop. There I was, hauling my fat ass to the bus with a goddamn Pop-Tart. Like, I wouldn't even throw that bitch in the toaster. I would just say, "You know what? Fuck it. I'm taking the Pop-Tart raw. I don't care." And honestly, bro, Pop-Tarts ain't even really a meal. I would just eat it because, well... I don't know. I didn't really have any other choice. Everything else would have just taken way too long, bro.
Or sometimes my parents would literally just wrap a goddamn waffle and say, take this with you on the bus. When I was in middle school and high school, I was never up on time, bro. That's what I was doing. One day I took a frozen waffle and I just said, fuck it, bro. I'm gonna wait for that bitch to thaw on the bus. Because there is no way I am starving in school. Absolutely not.
But the pastries were so clutch, bro. I would never have to bring a fucking frozen waffle again. So for that, B tier. Now next up, we got one of the most elite struggle meals out there. One that will change your life. One that will really open your third eye. Peanut butter and fluff or peanut butter and jelly is the most lethal combo of all time. Tell me not. Now when I was a kid, I would eat peanut butter and fluff and I would put so much fucking fluff on my sandwiches. Like I was just a plate cleaner.
But now I really wish I appreciated peanut butter and jelly more. That shit is so elite. Every single day for lunch, I would pack a peanut butter and fluff sandwich. That was my go-to. And sometimes all of us were struggling and we tried to trade with each other. And now PB&J's an S tier. But there's something better that I would always try to trade for. Yo, yo, bro, I'll trade you this can of tuna for that peanut butter sandwich. What the fuck, huh?
What the fuck kind of offer is that bro? You're gonna have to do way better than that. - Yo, check it. I got you a much better offer. I got you these cafeteria breadsticks for that sandwich. - Yo, that's a bet bro. That breadstick's hitting. - But what about my can of tuna? - Fuck your can of tuna bro. That shit's ass.
The cafeteria breadsticks were crazy. No matter how dookie the lunch food was, no matter what kind of abomination was on my plate, the breadsticks always saved the day. It didn't matter. Maybe it was just at my school and they had a sleeper pick on the breadsticks, but they would literally always sell out at my cafeteria. Like nobody was able to get them and they were a rarity. It was like a shiny Pokemon in that bitch. If somebody had breadsticks, people would beg.
to trade. You had the breadsticks. You were him. You were the motion man for that day. And a lot of the times my trades in the cafeteria got me no motion whatsoever. Like a pack of Ritz crackers was not doing it for some people. Like the amount of times I would try to trade for cosmic brownies or a pack of Oreos and nobody was taking me up on my offers, bro. I was a shitty ass salesman. That right there was a struggle in itself. Trying to trade food in the cafeteria.
those breadsticks they're going in god tier they're way too heat now let's talk canned food now canned food is either hit or miss in my opinion sometimes the preservatives in certain foods make it taste like trash i'm gonna keep it a book but sometimes though canned foods can be really clutch i don't know how many times my mom will whip up hot dogs and spaghettios for me for dinner that was a staple in the birdie household either that or the box of craft mac and cheese bro and that would feed the entire family too we would get the
Big-ass boxes and there will be so many of them in the cabinets I was never really messing with shit like canned beans canned pineapples stuff like that for that We got a slide canned foods in beats here next up. We got frozen foods And now there are so many frozen foods i've had in my lifetime, bro I've had fucking dijorno pizza schmuckers and my favorite bro pizza rolls coming home from school with pizza rolls in the oven was a blast
Blessing like none other bro. Another frozen food I would have all the time was dino nuggets Now, I don't know if y'all remember the dino nuggets, but bro them shits were crazy You want mac and cheese and dino nuggets again? Like jesus christ. Like what else do we feed you? I mean no wonder why I was a plate cleaner as a kid It kind of makes sense new video on that next by the way Now there was another scenario where frozen foods would come in clutch when I was outside riding my bike I would always fall off my bike
Because I absolutely sucked at riding my bike. And then I would roll around in the street and just cry and hope somebody just comes to rescue me. I really had no idea what I was thinking. But then when I would go inside, my parents would just take a bag of frozen peas and just slap it on my bruises. And we were all good. But I'm gonna toss frozen food in A tier.
Never reheat frozen food. That shit's fucking trash. Toast or bread with butter? Now this one be hitting, bro. When I was a kid, I didn't know how to fucking use a toaster. I thought that shit was fucking rocket science. So obviously, I was having bread with butter. But nowadays, bro, I just be throwing that bitch in the toaster oven and boom, I got myself some toast. Now sometimes I'll be stuck with the end slice of the bread, unfortunately. But you know what, bro?
Bread is bread. And when I was younger, I could not teleport to Walmart and get me a new loaf of bread. Unfortunately, I had to stick with what I had. The last slice was gonna have to cover me for today's lunch. I remember, bro, me and the duck would always fight over bread slices. And we always made sure that we weren't the one that got the last slice. But yeah, bread and butter's pretty fire, so, uh, B tier. But if you have bread...
It's just so clutch in many different situations. You can walk out of the kitchen with the most obscure ingredients of all time and turn that bitch into a sandwich. I've heard of some people pouring Domino sugar right on a piece of bread. Boom, sugar sandwich. Or sometimes, hell bro, people even put toothpaste on bread. That
is disgusting. I don't know why people would do that, but you know what, bro? We're all going through it. So I get it. I get it. And the one I would eat the most was a cheese sandwich, not grilled cheese because I didn't know how the fuck to cook a cheese sandwich, no lunch meat in the crib. So I had to resort with a cheese sandwich. It was just depressing struggle sandwiches, B tier low key. This one's kind of underwhelming. And a lot of them are kind of weird.
bro. Like, I don't know who's putting toothpaste on a sandwich. Lunchables. Oh my God. Now I have no idea what kind of genetic mutation I had in my taste buds as a kid, but I really thought the Lunchable pizza was good. And eating cold chicken nuggets? That is just such an L, bro. Like, I don't know who made this. Fuck the cold chicken nuggets, bro. Dino nuggets solo.
I really don't want to hear it. The only redeeming quality about Lunchables is that they would sauce me with a snack, bro. I'd get like two Oreos in there. I would be hyped, bro. Sometimes I would get the Lunchables that was slices of ham and crackers. That was it. And after I'd eat them, bro, I was starving. Because like I said, I was a big body. So Lunchables didn't exactly cure my hunger. But they did have the snacks though. So it's going in D tier. Off-brand foods.
Now, I never really had a lot of off-brand foods at all. I've only had off-brand foods like one time. They didn't have Froot Loops at the store, so they deadass one time brought home Fruit Spins, bro. What the fuck is this? Froot Loops, Fruit Spins, same fucking thing. But I want Froot Loops. Nah, bro, I don't care what you say. Your ass is eating them. Or else.
That was the best I was getting. I should have just been appreciative of the fruit spins. And honestly, they weren't terrible. Now, I don't know where to really put this one since I haven't really had it before. I guess I'll just put it in C tier. I guess it gets the job done if that specific cereal's out of stock. I don't know. But this one, this one's the worst, bro. Thankfully, I never had to do this. But for those of you that have, I'm praying for you, bro.
Sleeping it off. Yeah, this sucks I mean the only time I sleeped it off when I was afraid to get up to get food at 3 a.m I never really was forced to sleep it off another trick that people would use is they would just drink water So they don't feel hungry. This one is going in f tier. No matter what bro. You cannot endure the pain, bro
We need the nutrients, no matter what. But if you gotta do it for your survival, I guess you gotta do what you gotta do. But those are some of the best and worst struggle meals. Hope you enjoyed the video. If you liked the video, watch another one. Or hell, check out birdgang.shop. I dropped a new design recently, it's got some pretty wise words on it. If you pass the same tree twice, you're lost. It has nothing to do with fucking trees. But if you know, you know.