E564 Tom Green
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I have some new tour dates to tell you about. I'll be in Chicago, Illinois on April 24th at the Wintrust Arena. Fort Wayne, Indiana on April 26th at the Allen County War Memorial Coliseum. And Miami, Florida on May 10th at the Kaseya Center. We also have tickets remaining in East Lansing, Victoria, B.C. in the Canada College Station.

Belton, Texas, Oxford, Mississippi, Tuscaloosa, Alabama, Nashville, Tennessee, Winnipeg in the Canada and Calgary in the Canada. All tickets at TheoVaughn.com slash T-O-U-R. Today's guest is a comedian. He's an actor. He's a filmmaker. He's an innovator. He's a visual entrepreneur.

who really laid the blueprint for podcasting and prank shows in all types of genres. He's had one of the most unique and legendary careers in comedy, from the Tom Green show on MTV to as many movies like Freddy Got Fingered, Road Trip,

He just dropped three new projects on Prime Video, a comedy special, a documentary, and a scripted show. We'll get into all that. We're excited to welcome Canada's son, Mr. Tom Green. Tom Green, it's your first day back in L.A. in four years, did you say? Yeah, yeah. Feels good, actually. It's...

Yeah, it was weird. I just moved four years ago. It was kind of a somewhat spontaneous decision. You know, when COVID happened, remember that? And everything stopped. And all of a sudden, you know, I've been touring and everybody stopped touring, right? At the beginning. Yeah, everything kind of just stopped. I'm trying to remember if it was just me that stopped or did everyone stop? Everyone stopped. Yeah, yeah. So about the first six months or so of that, I was kind of...

I'm going to do. And then I just kind of realized I, well, I got this, I was telling you about my van. I got this van and I started going out into the desert and making videos and stuff. Here and outside of LA? Just outside LA. And I love being out in the desert so much and just waking up in the morning with a cup of coffee and just looking at the sun coming up over the mountains and just the peacefulness of that. Yeah. It's out in the Mojave desert. That was like the first day of the trip, I think four years ago. Yeah.

And so then, you know, I just decided to sell my house. I'd been in my house for 18 years. I sold my house and went back to Canada and bought a farm near where my parents live. And just, I can't believe four years went by. But yesterday was the first day back in Los Angeles in the van. We drove back down to the van. So I've been touring with my fiancee who you just met. I have a fiancee now. Went back to Canada. I've got a fiancee from Canada now. Yeah, good choice. And we came back in the van.

and, uh, and just drove into town yesterday. And, uh, it's pretty weird because it's like, it feels like I, nothing's really, it, it kind of makes you think about time. Time is weird, you know, cause I went away for four years and then you come back and I drove past my house that I lived in for almost 20 years. And now I'm staying in a hotel right down across from where the house is. I can actually see the house from the hotel room. I sort of did that on purpose cause I thought it would be weird. And, um, and, uh,

I'm going to this – I went to Arts Deli. I lived sort of in the Studio City area here and I went to Arts Deli and got my same pastrami sandwich and my chicken noodle soup and I've been going to some of the same restaurants, just been here for a day and it doesn't feel like it's been four years. It feels like I actually – I'm driving here. Today, I was sort of almost –

forgot that I didn't live here anymore. I kept thinking, oh, I'll go back to my house after. Oh, right. I don't live here anymore. So that's a strange thing. But on the flip side, in the last four years, I've got a farm, which I've now really settled into. I've got these incredible animals, which are now I'm really bonded with, this mule and this donkey and

two horses and chickens. And it's just like this. It's sort of been an incredible, incredible journey the last four years. So yeah, it's been cool. Was it something that you always wanted to have? You feel like a farm? I guess every human kind of maybe feels something like that. I'm going to get a little bit of land. I'm going to get some animals. Was it that or was it? No, it's weird because I never really imagined having a mule, you know, like and riding a mule every day. I didn't grow up with that. You know, I grew up in the suburbs and

of Ottawa, Canada. I'm outside of Ottawa, but...

And a mule is kind of like the El Camino of horses in a way. It's very much the – you know what I'm saying? It's not me saying, hey, I'm going to get a horse. It's like I'm going to get a mule. Yeah. Yeah. I sort of thought – initially I thought it would be kind of funny. And then the mule I happened to find, Fanny, is her name. And she's this beautiful mule. She's this huge animal. And that's Kia the donkey in the background. And so it's just become this –

Sort of amazing change. But yeah, I – you know, initially I hadn't really thought of necessarily getting a farm with a mule and all this stuff. But I wanted to get a place that was kind of in nature, really was – and then the farm happened to have these old barns on it. And I thought it would be kind of cool to get a mule in those barns. So I now am very much –

loving life up there. I get up in the morning and I have saddle her up and ride off into the wilderness. It's pretty cool. Really? So does it, and that's never something that you wanted. That was never like a thing of your whole life. Like I want to have this thing. It just kind of, yeah. I mean, I love, I always loved animals. I, you know, I have my dog Charlie and I've always enjoyed being outdoors, but I mean, it just, uh, it just kind of, uh,

I know every once in a while, you know, sometimes when an idea pops into your head and then you just go with it and then all of a sudden you've done it. This is like that, except it sort of occurred to me afterwards. You know, as I was doing it, I was realizing, you know, I'm going to have this mule for the rest of my life. You know, like they live to be – donkeys live to be up to 40, 50 years old. Oh, my God, really? And Kia's only three. So it's a lifelong commitment. The donkey could live after you. Absolutely. She probably will. But, yeah, so it's –

So, but it's, you know, it's, it's, um...

I think maybe I was looking for something that would kind of ground me and give me that home base that I needed. This is the first time I've ever lived somewhere where I know I'm going to be there for the rest of my life. I'm planting trees. I'm thinking, oh, in 20 years, these trees are going to be bigger. And I'm kind of sort of plotting out things that way. Yeah, that's interesting. I can totally relate with that and what you're saying about L.A. L.A. just feels like this kind of – it's almost like L.A. doesn't have a memory in it. It feels like –

I don't know, other places, I think, especially if it's a place that's a little more grounded, it feels maybe more meaningful for some reason. I don't know. Yeah, it's, I mean, it's weird. I moved here when I was 28. I think it was 28 or 29 when I moved to LA. I'm 53 now. And I mean, I loved it. I had a great time here. I wasn't leaving LA because I didn't, you know,

like LA or anything. It was just, it was more, I wanted to be close to my parents and they're still doing good. And I wanted to be close to family and stuff. And, but, um, but yeah, it's, uh, it is a, it is a unique place for sure. People come here from all over the world to pursue their dreams and, and, uh, there's sort of a energy there that's exciting. But, you know, when you, as I got a little older, you know, I left when I was 50 and, uh, you know, uh,

not married, no kids, COVID happened. I'd been in my house for 18 years. The real estate market went up. I was like, oh, maybe I should sell it now as opposed to five years ago. I wouldn't have wanted to sell it. So there was a moment in time, maybe I'll sell this place that I've been living in for 20 years, waiting for the right moment to feel like it was time to go. And

Because I don't know. I kind of felt like I wanted to be back where I grew up. I mean you're not from here either. So there's something very sort of I guess deep that you feel when you're home. I'm sure – you're from Tennessee. I'm from Louisiana. I live in Tennessee now. Louisiana. But yeah, it gives you – yeah, there's a sense of like –

Yeah, that you've been out of your soil for a long time, you know, that you've kind of... Like when you go back to Louisiana, you must feel like, oh, now I'm at home, right? This home. Oh, there's definitely a ton of nostalgia that I love, you know? I think it makes sense that...

a part of you wants to kind of go back where you came into the world at or be there, you know, to be, see people that care about me, see that, see people that I care about. Wonder if you've gotten enough of the, like the adventure out of your system in some ways, you can still have the adventure, but just have it from there, you know? Yeah. And I think also the part, like you're saying about, this is the first time you'd ever like planted plants. You're like, I'll see these. I've always felt like my life was very, um,

transient. Like I was just passing by. I've never been the type of guy to get like a lot of furniture or artwork or anything. I'm always just like, I don't know how long I'm going to be here. And it's always in here. I remember my forties and it's still, I still kind of operate like that. But at a certain point it's like, yeah, you want something that's a little bit more settling. Um,

And if you found a fiance, I'm sure that kind of helped a little bit. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Amanda's here where it's her first time in Los Angeles. Nice. You get to be a host and a tour guide. That's kind of nice. Showing around my, uh, my old hometown, my, my new old hometown. Yeah. And a camper too, dude. What was that about? Yeah. So that's, that's been pretty wild. It's, uh,

So like, cause when I got this van, I, uh, I kind of got pretty good at it. Like going to really remote places in the American Southwest, particularly like in New Mexico, Utah. Zion? You go to Zion? Yeah. I went to Zion. I did camp in Zion, but like there's, there's, there's this other kind of land called BLM land. It's Bureau of Land Management land that is basically all of the

and land that is owned by the U.S. government. It's managed by the Bureau of Land Management. And they'll cut roads into the desert and they'll put sort of campsite areas with fire pits and stuff. They kind of keep it somewhat organized so that people don't go driving all around the desert and trash in the desert. They have these roads and stuff. So you can get – I got this app. It's called Dirt, D-Y-R-T. It's like it's basically an app that gives you all the –

different locations of these sort of really obscure places that are not even in national parks or anything. D-U-I-R-T? Yeah, yeah. And so it kind of like you find stuff that is just unbelievable. Like I sort of can't stop talking about it to people that don't know about it. But like I mean you may know about Chaco Canyon, but I'd never heard of it before. It's in New Mexico. Yeah.

And in fact, if you go to my last YouTube video on my YouTube channel, that's just a video I shot a couple of days ago. And you can scroll down to like the second video, go to the second video. This is Chaco Canyon. So this is like Native American ruins that are essentially like built in the year 875. It's like, you know, and it's like, it's a city, you know, it's like a city in the desert. Right.

And it's just out there in the middle of northern New Mexico. This is Amanda, my fiancee, Amanda. Yeah, I think so. We're just going around making these videos. But you'll see, like look at this place. So it's like everyone always talks about Machu Picchu in Peru and they talk about all these incredible things in ancient places. But like the fact that you can just drive out of Albuquerque, drive north of Albuquerque,

Wow, this is there? Yeah, this is there. And it's really remote. Like it's on the Navajo Nation land. And so we just were out there camping for four nights and exploring and hiking off into this beautiful desert and –

Getting some good rest out there. Do you get good rest when you're out on the road? Oh, yeah. Absolutely, yeah. God, that's nice. It's nice. It's quiet. That's the tough thing to get, man. Just cooking on the campfire, and it's just been fun. And I enjoy photography, you know. You're shooting this really, really well. Yeah. I got sort of lots of different cameras and stuff, and I like to kind of do that. So there's something about shooting out in the desert that's just so beautiful because you have these long cameras.

and big open spaces. And there's an energy there that is just something that's hard to put your finger on, but it just, you know, I always kind of sort of, I never really kind of...

Maybe didn't even believe in that when I was younger when people would talk about the energy. Sedona's got this energy. But I feel this energy out there that's just of the people that live there, that built that place and other places like it. So it's kind of fun to go seek those places out. Yeah, you'll meet a lot of women. You're like, I never have a period when I'm in Sedona or whatever. And you're like, well, that's...

What are we talking? I'm saying like, but there's some great, you've met a lot of women that have said that. I mean, I just think you meet a lot of women who are, uh, you know, a specific thing for a lot of people to have said, but yeah, a lot of women are keeping crystals in the wrong places probably, you know, but,

But yeah, you meet a lot of people who are into that sort of thing. But I think that's probably like, I mean, the natives, it always feels to me like the natives are probably so in touch, more in touch with the earth and locked in on like the feeling of like the best places to be. That's why they love to be in like the Dakotas and in the Black Hills and stuff like that. And so to be able to go to one of those ruins, I bet, I bet there's still a lot of like,

just a lot of prehistoric or like native connection that's just looking for souls to pass through, you know? Yeah. What you just said is like really interesting because I was talking to basically an archaeologist the other day and he said exactly what you just said. Like there's this thing called intuitive archaeology where they go – because there's still stuff out in the desert that people haven't even found yet. Like it's how big it is and how vast it is. So they go out into these canyons and –

Northern Arizona and Utah looking for signs of ancient settlements and stuff. And they're sort of taught to intuitive archaeology. If you're in a place that feels like it would be a nice place to have lived, a beautiful place, there's a good chance that feeling is correct. And then you should sort of listen to that instinct and start looking for signs of ancient civilization. But it's pretty –

It's amazing because you do feel something out there. I don't know. I was talking about this friend the other day too. Like you ever go in like an old comedy club that's been, you know, like Zany's in Nashville or downtown Chicago is an old club, you know, and you see all the old pictures from the comics from back in the 70s and 80s and it's, you know, that club's been there forever and you kind of feel something.

The energy of – you see a lot of comics that have passed away on the wall and you say, oh my god, Sam Kinison performed here. I can sort of feel that energy of the performance in the room. So that's from 40 years ago or whatever. But now you take it back to the year 875. You're out in the desert and this place, Chaco Canyon, was a whole –

society where they did trading and people came from all over North America there. So it's a very peaceful thing. I do enjoy it quite a bit. And is that something that you and your fiancé have kind of

something you've really is that something you guys have found you like doing together i mean so to go camping a lot of people would end up getting separated usually i feel like this is her first time uh actually really coming to throughout a lot of the united states too so she's she's from canada uh and uh hasn't been out to the desert before so um but uh she's i mean she's she's we're having fun you know we're having fun out there but it's uh

It's, you know, we just have, this is our first trip doing this. So it's been cool. Was it scary to get engaged with?

Because you've been married before. Yeah, briefly. I was briefly married, yeah. And then... It was a long time ago, too. And you hadn't been married since, though? No, no, no. Okay. It's the first time engaged since. You know, no, it was not scary because... Because that was Drew Barrymore, right? It's early 2000s or something? Yeah, absolutely, yeah. But no, it wasn't scary because Amanda's amazing. So I knew it was the...

It was the right thing, the right – this was the thing to do. This had to be done. That feels like the hardest decision. Yeah, I think that's the thing like, yeah, I would like to get married, you know, and I'm just thinking like, man, that day when you're like, all right, I guess I'm going to get married today. That sounds crazy when I say that out loud, you know. You're a young guy too. To think that. There was a lot of things that happened that, you know, I don't know if you want to talk about, you know, I'm talking a lot about energy but coincidences and synchronicity and things like this. I moved back to Canada.

And I have a pond on my property and in the winter, it freezes over. And I shoveled the snow off the pond and I was playing hockey on the pond, like skating, playing hockey on the pond. I shot a video of that.

And put it up on the social medias. There we go. Wow, that's beautiful. Here we are out at the pond. Wow, you got a fast guy on the draw out there on the – I just literally just said that and he instantly found – so we're drilling a hole in the pond here and that's – and then we can pump the water out of that back on top of the pond and give it a nice smooth –

That's my friend Ryan. Oh, wait. So what are you using here to do this? This is a – It's just a little sort of a – kind of some sort of an ice auger or some sort. Okay. So that – so you take the whole – and then you pump the water out. Then we got a pump. We just stick a fire hose down in there and we pump water out of it. We pump it up on top of the ice. Okay.

and just basically flood the ice and then it freezes 'cause at night and then we get nice, some nice smooth ice out there. - How long does that process take? - Just a day, you know, this just took a day. The next morning was completely frozen, but then you get two feet of snow and then you gotta do it all over again.

But which kind of puts a damper on it. Wow, this is so cool. So that right there that you're on is a lake. It's a pond. It's a pond. Yeah. Okay. So that's a pond. There's the dock. So usually it's water. Yeah. Yeah. Right now you cut the holes. You're pumping the water out of the pond onto the top of the ice, which is on the top of the pond. Yeah. And then it gets, it's cold, you know, it's below zero. So then the next morning it was pretty much ready to, now normally you would shovel it off first, but we just kind of,

We're kind of a little lazy about that, I guess. And we just flooded it instead, which it ended up working out fine. But probably would have been better if we shoveled it off first. But that seems like that would have been a lot of work. Yeah, you don't have to do that. But there you go. See, and then...

So, yeah. So we were doing this and then I was shooting these videos playing hockey. There we go. This is the next day? Yeah. It's like probably the next day. So this is a common practice in Canada? Well, you know, if you have a pond, I mean, those are the barns in the background. That's my house up there behind there. And so...

You know, we used to do it in my backyard when I was a kid. Like we used to flood the backyard and- Yeah, Gretzky talked about that. Right. When he was on air, he talked about flooding his backyard. That's cool, yeah. Pretty cool. That's amazing. The great one. Yeah. Yeah, so we- I saw him at the inauguration. He lost a tooth.

Okay. It fell out. At the inauguration, he lost a tooth. Yeah, I chipped my tooth and I walked up to him. I was like, man, I chipped my tooth. And he's like, oh yeah. And he showed me this and he freaking lost one. Him and his wife were looking for it on the ground. Oh, okay. But it had been knocked out previously in a hockey game of some sort. Yeah, something like that. You didn't get punched out at the inauguration. No. I think he could have been shocked by some things he saw. Maybe that took it out. But yeah, he was just missing a grill piece at the inauguration. It was just pretty bizarre. Man, that's cool.

Dude, that's amazing. So these are the types of things you're spending time doing up there. You really document it really beautifully. And a lot of that doesn't even have a lot of audio with it. It's really just seeing, I've noticed this in some of your videos, it's just kind of seeing what's going on. Yeah, yeah. I kind of like to just kind of do these sort of ambient sort of things to kind of just kind of bring you into a certain place. It's sort of like, I like photography. This is just doing it with video and being there. Yeah.

But after I posted that video, Amanda, my fiancee, she saw it and she sent me a message on Instagram. This is how we met. And it was a video of a Zamboni, a do-it-yourself Zamboni, which is what a Zamboni is what you use to clean off the ice in a hockey rink, right? And so it was this homemade one. And we started, I just started talking to her because I thought it was a funny thing to send. And we, turns out we went to the same elementary school.

And, yeah, it was just sort of – it was just – went from there. Cool. Congratulations. Yeah, thanks, man. And did she meet your parents yet or no? Oh, yeah, absolutely. She did. Yeah, absolutely, yeah. Were your parents happy to have you back home? What was that like? Yeah. No, they are for sure, yeah. No hesitation. They were excited for me to come home, believe it or not, because sometimes people wonder, because I used to do a lot of pranks on them. Do they still talk to you? But my parents –

We were always very close. Even when I was doing my show on MTV and, you know, doing pranks on them and, you know, annoying them with the video camera, they would sort of laugh afterwards. And we've...

You know, always had a very close relationship. They're actually in my new show on Prime. You know, it's sort of about me moving home. Okay. The show's about me moving home. That's not the I Got a Mule. That's not that. That's my stand-up special. Okay, that's a stand-up special. That's on Prime as well right now, huh? Yeah, yeah. And there's a documentary on Prime and then the show called Tom Green Country. And it's sort of about me settling in at the farm. And they're hilarious. I mean, they really make the show. Like, there's something about...

Their sense of humor is – they're kind of razzing me in the new show more than me pulling pranks on them. I don't do that anymore. Kind of full circle. They've retired from being pranked. From being a victim? Yeah, absolutely. If you love Bitcoin or you're looking to get into crypto, then I've got the right thing for you. Introducing MoonPay, the easiest way to buy or sell crypto using the payment methods you already feel comfortable with.

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When you look back on it, do you ever able to figure out a reason why you liked to record things or like what you got out of like, you know, because as we get older, you kind of start to get a little bit of like an overview kind of of ourselves even, you know, in the world, maybe a little bit, a little bit of an idea of what we have been doing in the world. You ever able to figure any of that out? Kind of like the reasoning behind some of it, like why you liked capturing things or why you liked like.

Like pulling the wool over people's – or, you know. Yeah, I think there was kind of a few layers to that for sure. And that's a cool question. It's a great question because like one thing was we never really had a video camera or – when I was – I grew up in the 80s. So we didn't have a video camera or even a film camera. We didn't even take a lot of photos and we –

It was kind of expensive. People that had a video camera, they had a lot of money. They had a video camera. We never had a video camera. And so when all of a sudden they became somewhat attainable, I would sort of sign one out at school. And I found that it was kind of – first of all, I loved comedy. So I loved David Letterman. I loved watching him go out in the street and do stuff. And I loved Monty Python and just –

SCTV and I just loved comedy. I was doing stand-up comedy in Ottawa when I was 16 years old and like I was would go down to watch you know Norm Macdonald you know when he was in his 20s you know and I'm just like it was sort of a this amazing thing and I somehow had this sort of feeling that if I could just get a video camera and go film stuff that you know maybe I could you know make a show or whatever but

There's also Skateboarder, you know, and that was sort of skateboarding videos where – holy shit. Look at this. This is amazing. How did you find that so fast? Yeah, there me at 16 years old. Yuck, yucks. Yeah. How did you find that so fast? I don't even know how – you must have had that in advance. That is unbelievable. Is there some sort of weird algorithm here or something like that? I don't know if they did or not, but yeah, it looks great. Wow. Yeah, it looks so – Yeah. Look at that microphone too. It's like – they didn't even use the right microphone back then. But –

But I – no, I just – I don't know. I often kind of like think there's something about like – I don't know. I think I've always been really afraid of the concept of like being dead, you know, like being gone and like there being no sort of recollection of anything that you've ever done, right? Yeah.

I always found it interesting to just kind of document things and just record things and that will be there in some electronic way floating around there forever. It sort of feels in a little way like kind of like sort of a weird kind of immortality in a way. I think that's kind of what fascinates me about these ruins in the desert too. Like these people came and built these things in the year 875 and I'm walking through it and looking at it and filming it and talking about it with you.

And so they're kind of in a way kind of remembered, you know? Yeah. And then there was also just kind of the blatant, you know, when I was younger, I was a little quite a bit different than I am now. I think I've calmed down quite a bit. Like when I was younger, I really always needed to be kind of like, you know, the center of attention, the class clown, moving around a lot. It was weird as a kid. So –

To me, it seemed like a really good way of just kind of documenting all of this silliness, you know? And I loved it. I loved filming stuff and showing it to people at school. You captured so much. You were one of the first people really to just –

and just show it to people kind of, you know, like kind of like not shit, but I mean, just. - Yeah, no shit for sure. Yeah. Actually actual shit was involved quite a bit. - Yeah. We're going to capture shit and show it to you. What do you mean? Like, this is what we mean. And I can totally relate to what you said about, dude, I used to, when I was, I guess probably

turning around 20 to probably 28, I would make postcards and I would send them to my kids that weren't even born yet. Like whenever I was traveling somewhere, I would send them, I would make them out to my kids. I just wanted my kids to know that I'd been, I needed there to be some record that I like cared about my children, even though they weren't here yet, which is kind of a crazy thing, but it made me think about what you're saying. Like, yeah. And I would scrapbook, I would save things. Like I just wanted there to be

Like some proof that I felt something in the world and that I existed, right? I think I just didn't – I don't know if I just didn't have a lot of that or I needed an insane amount of proof and so that's why I did it. But yeah, I could just – I could definitely relate to that, to wanting to have some –

timeline. Yeah. So I, you know, just in case time ever showed up and said, Hey, were you here? I could buy. Well, yeah, yeah. Yes. Here I was, you know, I can show you my homework kind of or something, you know? Absolutely. Yeah. I can relate to that. Cause I talk a little bit, my standup special about, about not having kids. And I sometimes think it's kind of a bit of a message to my future children that, you know,

that I'm aware that I haven't had them yet, you know? And so I totally understand what you're saying about that. It's, yeah, I mean, it's a weird thing, you know, because 20 years ago, nobody had, definitely 30 years ago, nobody had video cameras really like they do now. But now everybody with their phones, everything documented.

It's so normal now, but I just put this documentary out on Prime, which is called This is the Tom Green Documentary. It's sort of a play on my old theme song on my show. This is the Tom Green Show was the song, right? So I went through like thousands of hours of video. I'm going back looking at 17-year-old me running around doing stuff. And it was actually kind of a pretty –

somewhat terrifying experience actually because it was like this opportunity to kind of tell the story of everything that happened with my show and everything that happened with my experience here in LA and I wanted to kind of you know tell the story right and I've got so much video and combing through all of it was at times you know

I'm somewhat kind of like – I would be looking at myself like I'm looking at a completely different person and I can't even believe – I'm finding things I don't even remember happening.

And I'm looking at things that are just so completely bonkers and silly and ridiculous. I'm like, whoa. Sometimes I couldn't look at the TV. I'm like, oh my, what was I doing? That's how you made us feel. Yeah, exactly. I was doing it to myself 20 years, 30 years later. And no, I wouldn't recommend it to anybody to go make a documentary about yourself. Definitely hire somebody to do that. Never watch it. But no, it was fun because I wanted to tell the story the right way. But yeah.

But it was also kind of very surreal. Was it hard to be true to yourself making your own documentary? And no one should probably make your documentary except for you because you're one of the rare cases, it feels like, that has documented themselves so much. And I don't even know if it's – I don't know if it seemed like an egotistical way. I don't think it ever came across like that of your footage. It just came across that you wanted to have –

control over how of yourself you wanted to put yourself out there. But was it hard to make a documentary and not want to like make yourself the hero or something? I've never made a documentary before. Yeah. Yeah. Or was there any of that in it or how do I make this? It's like the first scene of the documentary. I'm sitting with my mother and she actually says, are you really supposed to do direct a documentary about yourself? I mean, can't you kind of whitewash that a little bit? Are you going to do that? Yeah, I'm going to do that. But honestly, the

I wanted to be, you know, I wanted to be, I didn't not want to completely like, you know, put a false story out there. So I think the hardest part was trying to figure out how to not be too self-deprecating, you know, because, you know, you think, you know,

When you get to my age, you look back and you think, oh my God, I wish I hadn't done that or I wish I hadn't done that or I shouldn't have said that or shouldn't have done that. And I have a lot of those things, right? They're constantly rattling around in my head. And you start to think like, man, maybe this is a good way for me to go and just like apologize for everything that I perceived that I've done wrong in my life, right? Yeah.

And then you have to kind of take a step back and go, well, wait a minute. That might just be in my head. So I spent a lot of time talking to a lot of people about people that I know, people I'm close with, about the story of – really it's the story of the show and takes us through the story of kind of creating the show and then building before the show with my music and then after the show with –

building a web TV studio here in Los Angeles. And it's sort of a telling of that story. But then I wanted to talk a bit about some of the personal things that I went through. I had cancer when I was on MTV and I talked about that. I made this movie, Freddy Got Fingered, which was not critically completely embraced. Ha ha ha!

So it's like I wanted to explain myself a bit. But then at the same time, there's a lot of people now that like the movie, believe it or not. So I didn't want to completely – And hate the critics now. Yeah, yeah. So it's sort of like it was a very tricky balancing act.

And then on top of that, there's just so much footage and so many weird little funny clips that only I know are the ones that people like or people have or haven't seen. And I kind of wanted to make sense of that all and piece it all together. I don't think anyone else would have been able to find it all, you know? Yeah. So, but... Was there a project that you kind of wanted to do over the years that you didn't really nail or you didn't... That something that didn't happen? Was there something? Because you've just done so much stuff. I mean, you know, it's...

It's interesting because like in fact that's part of what the documentary is about because like when I was a – got into making the show when I was growing up, all I could even imagine myself doing was I wanted to be a talk show host. I wanted to do basically a show like David Letterman, right? Have guests on and then I go out in the street and be a nutcase, do goofy stuff, right? And I got to do that a few times over the years and –

When those shows go away, initially when that happened, that was back in the day of MTV. The first show I stopped when I got sick. So it didn't actually get canceled, the Tom Green show. But then when I started, I did a nightly show. When it kind of got canceled, I was thinking, oh my gosh, this is the worst thing that could ever happen to me that I could ever imagine that I'm not going to be able to do

A nightly talk show. This was devastating to me. And as time marches on and I look at all the things that I've done instead, touring, doing stand-up or moving back to the farm and everything in between, I kind of realize, man, I'm kind of –

Kind of glad that actually didn't work out because if that show had been a big hit, then I would have been going down to the same studio every night for the last 30 years and I wouldn't have gotten to do all these other things. So Freddie Got Fingered, of course, was a –

movie, you know, purposefully so. Yeah. Did you guys make that yourselves? Yeah. I wrote it with my friend, Derek, and we, I directed it. You did? Was it your first time you'd ever directed a movie? It was, yeah. Wow. It was. But it was, we had a budget, you know, it was 20th Century Fox. We had, you know, because the show was doing good on MTV, so they let me direct it, you

Which was probably a mistake. But no, it was – we really pushed it to make it like – we were in our 20s. So the idea was let's make this the craziest movie ever made. It's literally we actually believed that we could do something like that. And so it gets complicated because then how do you define failure? Like it's –

It came out, Roger Ebert, and it wasn't Siskel. It was the other guy. He had another guy there. Oh, yeah, the second straight. Ebert and Roper. Ebert and Roper, they sent that guy in. Yeah, even he didn't like it. He didn't? Even Roper didn't like it. I mean, it wasn't even Siskel. It was Roper, whoever that guy was. But anyways, they trashed it, and you're kind of thinking at the time, man, this is devastating. Ebert and Roper are trashing my film, you know?

But – and you think, oh, you start to question every sort of choice you've made. I don't know. This guy looks like he also likes canned sardines at the same time. And these days, who would – nobody even trusts the critics anyway. So it's kind of funny now that it's like – Yeah. At the time, like –

It was the end of, you know, the line if these guys trashed your movie. Oh, yeah. I can totally imagine that. It's like my first movie and all this stuff riding on it and then these come on just destroyed it. And I remember just sitting there like watching this just thinking, oh, my gosh, this is it. You know, this is the end. But, you know, it wasn't – you know, I just kept going, kept doing my thing. And you look back at it and go it's kind of funny now that they didn't like it, you know? Yeah, it's kind of awesome that they didn't.

It's weird because there's a weird sort of counterintuitiveness to it because we set out to make a movie that those guys would not like. And then when they don't like it, you're upset about it. Yeah. It's like I kind of thought that they would sort of see the irony and go, I know we're not supposed to like this, but actually this kid's pretty clever. No, no, no. They didn't say that. What was the budget on that movie? Do you remember? $14 million. Wow. They spent on that. Plus an additional –

10 on promotion and advertising and stuff. And you know what? I will say it made it all back on DVD. Remember DVD? Remember they used to put DVDs out? So I think I've heard it made 35 million on DVD. So it actually was a profitable movie. Made 14 million at the box. I'm here defending it now. It made its money back. It made its money back. No, but it did. So it did make its money back. But you know,

Ebert and Roper aren't going to tell you that though. They're not going to tell you that. Well, it wasn't the Titanic. No, no, exactly. It was. I mean, it was in a way, but in the sense that it bombed. But no, it was – it's funny though because – It's cool that you did it though. There was a long period of time there where I was made to feel like it was a really bad decision. And then in the last like 10 years, it's like –

You know, all I hear are people saying they love it. You know, someone today showed me they had an x-ray cat tattoo, you know, like it's a character in the movie, you know. So it's like it is a little confusing when you talk about sort of, I mean, your question was how do you handle things like failure and things like that. It's like, you know, it's kind of the more of those kind of things you go through, the more you kind of learn to kind of embrace it in a way. It's kind of it's almost a good thing, you know.

Yeah, David Spitt and I just wrote a movie together, not to name drop or anything, but we did and we just funded ourselves and stuff. And so it's just kind of a scary time, I think. So that's why I'm asking that as well. Not scary. It's exciting too, but it's also like, yeah, I just, one day I'll be like, that's something I tried to do. I was trying to be creative and we tried our best and I got to try it with, you know,

who I love to watch anyway. Oh, that's cool. So you've written it. Are you going to go make the movie? We have five days left shooting. Oh, you're shooting the movie already? We start back tomorrow. Kind of like a Joe Dirt 2, 3 kind of thing? Yeah, it's like a... No, it's a good question. It's like two guys. One of them gets hit by a vehicle. My character gets hit by a car when he's young. And Spade...

rescues me yeah and he and i become friends in and he gets me a job years later we're working together like at a sewage company oh nice repo man man kind of yeah type of shit well you know you the thing is that you're you're in good hands here because you're with a guy that's done this a lot before he's done it a lot and it's sort of a season like if i had to direct it too like i like to like chime in with the director and stuff like that and throw in ideas and stuff like that

But it's just definitely a big learning curve. It's a lot. So I can't imagine, especially in our budget, it's just a couple million bucks. So if it were really big, that'd be really, I feel like it'd be scary kind of. Yeah, I mean, back then we were shooting on film. Things cost more. You know, it was, at the time, was considered a low budget movie, right? But, you know, I think that, I don't know, it just seems like the way things get,

released these days and the ways people embrace weirdness these days. I'm assuming it's kind of a weird movie. Yeah, it's odd. Yeah, it's just funny. It's just like old school funny. So like a funny movie, right? You have this incredible thing going with your show here, so you have your audience built in, so you don't really have to worry about the same things that maybe

Back in the day when you put out something crazy and sort of in a sea of somewhat normal movies coming out every weekend.

All getting funneled through this sort of mainstream cinema release system. Right, this conglomerate, yeah. It's very strange. Like we had to take the movie and focus group it. Oh, wow. And then people would sit there with pads. And it was in Phoenix. We flew down to Phoenix to focus group Freddy Guts. That's where they do a lot of them, huh? Yeah, yeah. For some reason they do them there in Phoenix. And like –

Then someone stands up after the movie and asks them what they didn't like about the movie. Well, with Freddy Got Fingered, I mean we're sort of supposed to not like any of these scenes. You're supposed to be polarizing. So it didn't really kind of work with the focus group system and then you had to make changes to it and all that kind of stuff. But you probably – you guys probably –

or have a lot more creative control over things. I think we'll just make a trailer and put it out. Yeah. You know, I'm guessing I have no idea. I'm just, I haven't, part of my brain hasn't even gotten to that thought, that thought yet, you know? That's exciting. But it's, it's definitely feels kind of, yeah, it feels like just like,

Well, I wanted to, you know, we tried to do it. Who knows what will happen, you know? Oh, it's going to be awesome. Absolutely. You and Spade, I'm going to go see that. That's incredible. Well, thanks. I appreciate it, man. Everybody will. Everybody's going to love that. It's going to be interesting. Yeah. That's what I'll say. That's what I do. Yeah, I do believe that it'll be interesting. Of course it will. How did you deal whenever there were tough times, like...

because you had so much of like recording yourself, like setting, you know, like kind of like living under your own recording schedule and stuff like that. Were there days off? Like when you would just have your show from home, right? Was there days where you would just like take off? What was that shoot schedule like when you were... When I was doing the web show at home? Well, I mean, it was... So there wasn't really sort of a podcasting yet. Wasn't really a thing really, right? So...

So we built the studio and it would basically just stream to my website. I mean, there was no Instagram yet. YouTube had just started. And people would come and watch it on the front page of TomGreen.com. And we actually had like a company in San Francisco that made like the video playback system, you know. So it was CDN, Content Distribution Network. It was basically... So we would upload a video to that. We weren't uploading it to YouTube and linking it or... There was no YouTube really. So...

So it was kind of just a big sort of science experiment that I was doing with, you know, my group of friends. And, you know, I had the sort of goal of trying to sort of make it a show that would become profitable, get advertisers and maybe sell it to television, which we did a little bit of that, you know. So, you know, I was kind of –

pretty driven, I guess. And it's kind of what I notice now with like podcasting, which is amazing is like, you know, the people that have these incredible businesses that they've got going, these incredible people

you know, artistic visions they have for themselves. They're all kind of have that same kind of drive in them. You know, they get up in the morning, their mind is just like, how are we going to make this better today? And how are we going to make this awesome today? You know? So it was kind of, it was kind of like that, you know, we were getting up and turning on the studio every night and I did be inviting up, you know,

And Too Short came up and Jurassic 5 and Exhibit and then you wrap up comedians – invite comedians up and like Joe Rogan would come over and Norm MacDonald who I became good friends with would start coming over all the time. And literally like hundreds and hundreds of people would come over and it became this kind of really –

fun thing to do. I wasn't doing stand-up at the time. I hadn't done stand-up in years. So I was really just doing that. And...

You know, it was ridiculous. I mean, we were just enjoying the absurdity of it. Oh, yeah. Was it so stressful? It was because I put pressure on myself and I would actually get stressed out about it. And then we would have people that would prank call us. So I had this phone system on the desk and you could just call it and it would ring and I'd hit answer. So we had like –

you know people trolling us basically i remember getting rick rolled for the first time you know that's like and it was like oh i kind of felt like i don't know if i'd ever heard of rick rolling before i got rick rolled you know and um it's cool and it became kind of like a little bit of a game you know like where we were there was a switch that i'd built with uh uh bill schnitzer was his name he worked there and uh victor a couple of the guys that worked there

And we built the switch under the desk. It was like metal. And it was like we got a metal box with a switch and we had wires and we soldered them together. And then the wires ran out to the computer. And then Bill was able to program the computer so that when like I flipped that switch, it would – like if everything was off, it was the middle of the night in my house. Yeah.

It's quiet night, nobody there. And if I were to get up at one o'clock in the morning by myself and put clown makeup on, which I often did, and a top hat and walk out into my living room and flick the switch, the switch would turn on the lights, would turn on the cameras, would turn on the computers. This computer would tell this computer to start recording. The phone system would turn on.

He would send it to the front page of my website. Just one switch. I haven't done anything. All I've done is put on some clown makeup and flipped a switch, right? You don't have to put on the clown makeup, but I did do that often. Yeah, you better. It was called the French clown of midnight. I'd speak in French in clown makeup. And you wonder why it didn't work out. But then the phone would start ringing and I'd just be doing the show. I'd have a switcher on the desk so I could switch the cameras and I would just start taking calls.

And it was really the only live video on the internet. Like, really. Like, there was no Instagram Live or anything. So it was like, you imagine, when I was a kid, I wanted to do, I like prank calling the radio station. Oh, yeah. I'd like to call into the radio station. And I would call into the radio station and I'd record it. And then I'd call into the radio station and I'd pretend I was like my friend's father. And I'd call and I'd start complaining about my son. And I'd use his name and I'd play the tape back to him. And it was hilarious to me, you know.

And so I loved that, like pranking a radio station. And I kind of started to realize like we're the only live show on the internet right now with a phone with no call screener. All these people like me around the world could now call in and prank me. And so we kind of got into this little sort of war basically, which was –

Fun because I would get angry about it, but then also I kind of didn't have to turn the phone on. Right, right, right. You know? You know?

So it was really fun. And I got to meet a lot of great people. I mean, that's where I really got to hang out with Joe Rogan for the first time really and Norm, who I became really close with, and so many other people. It was amazing. Did Norm – did you talk to him much in the later years?

Well, at the very end, I did not know that he was sick. I didn't know he was sick. So that was – It seemed like he kept that from everybody. Yeah. And he's from my hometown. He's from Ottawa, Canada. And he started at the same comedy club that I started at Yuck Yucks in Ottawa. Howard Wagman, who's the – still owns the comedy club in Ottawa –

Yuck Yucks, which is like all across Canada. It's kind of like the improv of Canada. Oh, yeah. I've heard of it. I've been to one of them, I think. Yeah, yeah. So he's awesome and he put Norm on the stage for the first time and tells his story about how Norm got off stage the very first time he did stand-up. He was in his 20s and he didn't think he did well and he was walking down the street. I'm never going to do that again. And Howard chased him down Spark Street in Ottawa and stopped and said, you've got to come back tomorrow. And he made him come back because he saw his –

his genius right yeah nobody was like him they just had they were just talking about him uh i just watched the snl monologue that he did one time yeah that was pretty great where he's like they fired me from the show but now they want me back you know yeah which is and how it just didn't even make any make any sense and you just kind of shit on the show yeah um it was weird like because like it's weird like i find myself sometimes now talking about 2005 like it was like

50 years ago or something like that. But it really is – things have changed so much in the last 20 years with social media that it does really feel like kind of a different world. Like I remember Norm would come up and the first time he came up, I just couldn't believe I was going to hang out with him and hang out with him for two hours on camera. Yeah.

sort of in some ways kind of doing a make-believe talk show, even though there were people watching. It was kind of like, you know, experimental talk show. And he was getting into that. And then the show would end and we'd go, you know, on YouTube and go look at videos. And I was like, I remember it was like YouTube was so new that it was just the strangest thing. I'd be sitting with Norm MacDonald after doing this for two hours and we'd be sitting there watching, you know,

Crazy clips that he would find, you know, like baby versus cobra, you know, with the cobras mouth sewed together. Those are good, yeah. Grape lady falls. I remember watching these videos with Norm and just dying of laughter, you know, in the middle of the night and just thinking this is cool. Now it's just so normal to look at viral videos and stuff. But back then we thought we were just – have you ever seen this video? I've never seen this. Oh, man. I mean it's a little bit – can you play the audio too? Is it possible? Because the audio is –

sort of important for this one. These are filled with Chamberson grapes and the winner this Saturday who's done music, eating international foods, having wine tours and tasting, vineyard tours, seminars, arts and crafts. It's a lot of fun, a whole day. Stop. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

So yeah

Yeah. Ouch. Ouch. They're struggling not to laugh. And that lady has the smallest head as well. If people's heads are real small, they should not talk a lot. I love that. That's your takeaway for this, is her head size as well. It is true, though, by the way. I'd never noticed that. That lady has a very small head. When people with small heads talk a lot, it feels like they're –

They're cheating the system a little bit. I just feel like a regular head, you get a regular amount of words. Small head, less words. Don't do too much. Right. Or at least just talk in sort of the...

of words that your head should justify, your head size should justify. Yes. Don't be a crazy little head just doing a bunch. Yeah. I dated a girl one time for a while with a small head, beautiful girl, great girl, but knew when to talk, when not to talk. You wouldn't see her just yammering on like some big head. Yeah. You know? So,

So I walk in. Did you notice right away that she had a particularly small head or was that something that sort of dawned on you later? She had big hair, big kind of Italian-ish hair. And every now and then I would feel her head and I was like, oh, I feel like there should be a little more head here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So once you got under that, the hair was puffed out probably purposefully. We probably knew that her head was small. It was an espionage. It was a mirage. Yeah. Hiding it a little bit. Yeah. Probably a little self-conscious of it. Yeah. Could have been. Yeah.

But yeah, cool girl, small head, but knew how to use it, right? Yeah. Not somebody that was ambivalent to their head size and is just running around just squawking at the moon every chance they get. This episode is brought to you by MeUndies. Underwear drawers are like the Wild West. You never know what you're going to pull out or what shape it's in.

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Learn more at ForThePeople.com slash Theo. That's F-O-R ThePeople.com slash T-H-E-O. Did you, um...

Yeah, what did I do? Oh, yeah, I just went to the SNL 50th. Oh, yeah, that's amazing. Yeah, I know. Was that incredible? It was cool. You got to host it. I did. I know. That's amazing. I was on tour. I wasn't able to go. I would have loved to have gone to that. That must have been wild. I went to the 40th. And I remember that was – that is just the most surreal thing. If it's anything, I imagine it was. Like just everybody is there, right? Yeah, I'll get to go to the music night and then –

I'm buddies with Louis CK. He took me to Chris Rock's birthday party. Oh, nice. On Saturday night, which was crazy because Chris Rock is always like my favorite comedian growing up. And so just to even be able to be there, I definitely felt like out of place or whatever, but it was also cool, you know, just to like...

you know, kind of fly on the wall there. So did you do really actually feel out of place there? Yeah. A hundred percent. And why, why do you think that is just like, it feels like kind of fancy, you know? I mean, I could tell right when I saw Chris rock, how I felt like some people, you don't get nervous on him or you've seen him a couple of times. And so there becomes a little bit ambiance, you know?

But I just didn't know him. And so, yeah, I think that created some of the nervous energy. Some other people I did know. So it wasn't that bad. But I got introduced to people that I didn't know. And so you're always like.

I don't know. I don't usually say a lot then. I'll kind of just be a listener. Yeah. You know? See, I get like that too. And I wish I didn't. This sort of social anxiety when you're in an environment like that where there's just all these, you know, people that you admire and respect and are around you and everybody. It's kind of...

I kind of don't even feel like myself. You know, it's a sort of a very stressful thing for me. Yeah. So in some ways I was kind of. That's a good word. It's stressful. Yeah. Yeah. And I don't know why that is. Why is that? Well, I think it's because you're a little bit probably. I don't know how I fit in this circle. There's a lot of circles in the world where I get it. But you're on top of the world right now. You just interviewed the president of the United States. I mean, everybody, you've got this incredible show. I mean, I'm sure everybody was super excited to see you there. So you probably don't really have any reason to feel nervous, but you still do, right?

Yeah, yeah, I guess. Yeah, I just didn't know. I hadn't been in that circle before. It's kind of like, I guess, when you're in a, I don't know, when you're in, just feel like you're in a new water, you're figuring out the temperature. You don't know, you know, you don't want to make a lot of noise at somebody's birthday party. They are seeing friends that they know. It's not a huge group of people. So you just want to kind of, you know.

You don't want to overstay your welcome, you know, kind of type of type of energy, you know? Yeah. I don't need to tell a big story. Let the, they all, they know each other. I'm just happy to be here. Yeah. Happy to be able to see somebody celebrate their birthday, to witness people that I admire from a little bit of a way, you know, from a little closer than I'm usually allowed to get to them, you know, online or on TV, I guess. But the SNL thing was,

We went to the music. They had a music show. At Radio City? Yeah. And that's the part that I got to go to. And that was pretty cool. Just seeing different bands. Jelly Roll performed. And so I know him. Nice. And so there was...

Yeah, and I got to bring a friend, and so I knew my buddy was – we were just kind of milling around, running into some people that we knew and meeting some new people, but it was pretty chill. So when you went to the – you went to the inauguration too, right? Yeah, I went to the inauguration, yeah. So like when you go to the inauguration and you've already – now you know the president of the United States because you had this interview with him. Yeah. Like did you kind of hang out with him at the inauguration or – No, no. I didn't see any of them. I was in like the second –

of humans there or something, you know, like there was a first tier and then I was in like this, a second tier of humans that were there. But that's gotta be kind of, uh, still interesting nonetheless to be there. Oh, it was interesting. Very interesting. Cause I never, you don't even know if like the, the, the process is real. You see it on TV, but it's like, who knows if that shit's real, who knows what's real anymore. So to witness that was pretty cool just to be in Washington, DC is always pretty neat with all the architecture. Uh,

but I don't know Trump like that. Like I'll message with his daughter sometimes, Ivanka. Okay. So I'm able to communicate with her. And then what do you guys talk about? She'll just send me a book that she thinks I would like, or when we went to dinner one time, she's so smart. Yeah. Okay. It's mind blowing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Um,

And so go to dinner with her a lot or no, I only went one time. That's pretty cool. Was, was her husband Jared there or was it just you two? He wasn't. It was other friends of hers. Okay. Yeah. Not trying to break any news here, but it sounds interesting. Not at all. I wish there were news to break, dude. She's stunning. She's awesome. And then there's like a middleman, like who worked with the, I guess, I don't feel, I guess he worked with the Republican party and he got to invite some people. Yeah.

So it was just a motley group of strange people that went to the inauguration. So how did that work? So can I ask you a question, sir? Yeah, sure. Yeah. So when he came on your show, right? It was right before the election and he was doing a lot of podcasts and stuff. Did they approach you or did they call you? His son is a fan of your show, right? Is that what it is? Yeah, that's what he said. He said Barron was a fan of the show and I tried to get to see Barron, but I didn't get to meet him. So he just got a call one day and Trump wanted to come on the show and-

Well, I'd seen – I'd met Trump a couple times at UFC. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. UFC I think is – had everything to do with winning the election probably for the Republicans. Yeah, yeah. Because Dana White is just such a –

facilitator. He just gets things done. He kept his sport going while all the other sports were shut down. A lot of them were shut down or, uh, having to practice really intense methods during COVID, you know, he was able to keep his sport going like, um, and so he would, he brought Trump to a lot of his events cause they've been friends for a long time.

And so I'd met him there a couple of times. And then I knew his brother died of alcoholism. So I was like, well, let me call him and let me ask Dana if, if Trump would ever talk about his brother. I didn't know about it, you know? And just to see what he's like, like, is he just all a business guy? Does he think about other things? Cause when you're, you don't get a lot of, you,

You don't hear a lot about his feelings, Trump's feelings. And if you do, he doesn't communicate it in a way where it's very emotional to people. I don't feel like. Right. So I was just curious about that. So, yeah, I called up Dana and he said, we'll make it happen. You know, then two days later he called back and he said, all good. Somebody from his group is going to reach out to you.

So you went to him, right? And we went to him up in New Jersey. Yeah. And we offer, we would have, we would have loved to had Harris and walls on. We're still trying to get walls on. We tried to get Harris on even after the election, but they just didn't want to come. Yeah. And so it was kind of a bummer, you know, cause I think. Seems like that was a pretty big mistake. They didn't do, didn't go on a lot of the shows that,

Yeah, I think it would just let them be more normal. I think people are, if something's too much behind the glass these days, people don't trust the glass. I don't even think that they don't trust the person behind the glass. I think they just don't trust the fucking glass, if that makes any sense. Yeah, no, it does. Yeah, so I guess that was all kind of interesting. I'm kind of out of sorts with the way that they're handling like the Gaza-Palestine stuff. Like that shit really, I think, is insane to me, you know, but that's just, you know,

I don't know. That's just my thoughts. It's kind of an endless sort of quagmire you can find yourself in once you start talking politics. When you get into it too much. I agree. In this world we're living in now because it's like you go on the road, you do stand-up all around the country and everybody's sort of divided in a way, right? And then you start sort of firmly choosing a side and all of a sudden half the audience doesn't want to –

have any fun anymore, right? So it's kind of like you got to be fine. We got to make these choices now like, okay, well, do I want to give my opinion anymore about what's going on in the world? You know, and then, you know, you have to choose one of the

set of opinions that are on this side or the set of opinions that are all evenly and neatly put on this side. And as soon as you state your opinion about one of these issues that just happens to be on this side, then anybody that doesn't agree with you no longer wants to fuck with you and come to your show or have a good time or have a laugh with you. So it's just such a shitty thing to have to deal with that, right? Yeah. So how do you kind of like juggle that? Yeah.

Because as a Canadian, it's like right now in Canada, people are pretty upset with Donald Trump because he's putting these tariffs on Canada, right?

right? And saying they're going to make us a 51st state. Saying they're going to annex Canada. People aren't too happy about the idea of being taken over by the United States of America, doesn't it? It's not something that people are super excited about hearing. So you kind of go... It's funny because sometimes I think like, well, I think a lot of Americans who don't think about it that much might think like,

Oh, Canada is going to be the 51st state. I bet you everyone in Canada must be really excited about being the 51st state of the United States. But, you know, I'm kind of saying, well, no, it'll probably be the first state in America that nobody in it wants to be America, you know? So, uh,

So, because, you know, we've got our own country. It's not that we don't love America. I love America, but we sort of have our entire different culture. You go to Canada all the time, right? Yeah, I love it. And I'm glad it's Canada. We're different, right? It's a different thing. Yeah, it's different. You're nice to a...

You know, people will be – somebody will walk across the street in Canada and just come tell you they're sorry and then go back across the street and then nothing even happens. They're not even – They just came off just to apologize. There's no even – you've never seen them before, you know. But it's – Canada is the best. I think Canada gives me hope for humanity a lot of times. It's good people, you know, like –

I love Canada. I wish, I wish that there was, there's times I've wanted to be, be Canadian even. What's, do you remember the first time you went to Canada? Yeah, Vancouver. Yeah. And was that somewhat recently? Brothel or hostel. I slept at a hostel. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. And,

How many years ago would that have been? That was probably 15, 18 years ago, 17 years ago. And it was great, man. I had a great time. Were you doing stand-up there? I hadn't started. I had just almost started stand-up. I was traveling. I was left out of there on a school, floating university. I left out of Vancouver called Semester at Sea. Yeah, yeah. And it went around the globe, and we left out of Vancouver. But I went up to Whistler. I went and caught a ride. Some guy took me hitchhiking up to Whistler, right? Drove me up there. Yeah.

The guy who drove me, he was a caretaker for Superman who had died. Remember Superman who got in the wheelchair? Yeah, Christopher Reeves. Christopher Reeves. He was his caretaker. Okay, okay. This guy, Michael. And I think I met him. I was at...

some shop right around there. And he was saying he was in the area or something. He's like, I'm taking the drive up to Whistler. I was like, can I roll with you? He's like, yeah. So he took me up to Whistler, man, brought me back. We stopped along the way, went on some hikes and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was amazing. But I've always enjoyed Canada. I used to have a dream that I would meet a wife in Toronto. Yeah. But I went and did two weeks of comedy up there, didn't meet anyone. Yeah, yeah. Well, it could still happen for sure. It could still happen. Yeah.

Do you find the audiences react differently? They're great. Halifax was one of my favorite shows I've ever had in my life. Yeah, yeah. Dude, I even made – my little nephew made up this joke. He said – oh, I told it on stage. I was like, yeah, I heard one time that there wasn't any more fish up here.

And so they changed the name to No Fish Scotia. And nobody laughed, right? That's why I'm laughing because I can imagine the reaction. Sometimes there's something great when they don't laugh. Oh, sure. There's some little thing in there. It's like, oh, that's pretty good. Yeah, absolutely. You know? But yeah, always had a great love for Canada. I think it's bizarre that...

Trump would say something like that. And it's also like, it just, but what do you expect out of him? You know? And what do you expect about the media to spotlight things and make it whatever it is, even if it's a seed of something to grow it into a million plants, you know? Yeah, no, it's, it's interesting. I think, you know, there's a thing that's going on the hockey games in Canada now where the USA and Canada playing and, you know, the four nations, right? Yeah. The Canadian fans were booing at them. Right. And,

You know, sometimes I go like, well, I don't, you know, based on the reaction on social media, I sort of feel like maybe not everybody in the US necessarily understands why that's happening. You know, they don't know it's about the tariffs. You know, they're not booing the national anthem. They're booing this, the fact that

These tariffs are being put on, which is going to, of course, devastate the economy on both sides. We'll suffer from that, right? I'm sitting here talking about it like I know about it. I should probably know more about it. But it's like – I think people are just kind of like –

Why are you guys doing this to us? So it's kind of an interesting thing. But you want to talk about issues sometimes and then you go, okay, I've just waded into this sort of hornet's nest and I'm never going to hear the end of it. So it is interesting. What was it when you're at the inauguration, after the inauguration, where you're like kind of just – who are you hanging out with there? Like –

I went, who did I meet? I met this kid, Alexander Wang. We just had a podcast episode with him. He created this company called Scale AI. He's like this AI. He's the youngest billionaire ever. This Chinese kid. Oh my gosh. From New Mexico. Wow. Fascinating dude. Um, so.

Self-made billionaire. Self-made billionaire. Yeah. So I ended up having lunch with him. That was probably the neatest thing that happened that weekend. Did he pick up the tab or – I think I paid actually. You paid. I didn't know he was a billionaire. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. That's why he's a billionaire. He's letting everyone else pick up the tab. I was just happy to be dining with the Chinese, you know. Yeah. That's amazing. Oh, it was great, man. Yeah.

And then who else? Something else happened at night. Oh, I saw Wayne Gretzky lost his tooth. Wow. And then anything. I saw Joe Rogan for a few minutes. I saw Tony Hinchcliffe from Kill Tony. Yeah, yeah. And then...

And then that was kind of it. And then I went home. It was too much, like too hard to get around. I saw Lex Friedman. That was pretty neat. I'd never met him. He's a podcaster. Yeah, I've met him at the Mothership before. Oh, nice. Yeah, yeah. So it was just, that was kind of, those were some of the neat parts of it. Yeah, yeah. It's amazing. Just getting to see some different folks. Yeah. Yeah, I think they're having issues even in America. They're having, I just saw that there's a part of Oregon that wanted to secede from Oregon. Yeah. Yeah.

They're going to become Canada's 11th province. Good. I would love it if we started trading pieces of our... Now that I'm totally for. New York and California, come join Canada. Take one of them. You guys can, you know...

I'm not going to say who you guys can take, but, you know, because we... No, I know who you're talking about, dude. I've got to be political. Sacre bleu. Okay. That's all I'll say, brother. No, no. Just me and Quebecois, actually. Je parle français. I lived in Quebec a lot in my life. You did? Yeah. So I grew up in Quebec. So I love Quebec. Yeah. Yeah. You must have been up to the Montreal Festival over the years or... Yeah, we went there a couple of times. I love Quebec. It's fun.

Yeah, Edmonton. We got some other places we're going to. Calgary and Ottawa and Winnipeg we're going to go to this year. Oh, yeah. So when you're in Ottawa, maybe if you're rolling past the farm and the tour bus, come by the farm and we'll go ride some mules or something. How far outside of town are you guys? About like an hour or so. Oh, wow. Yeah, yeah. So sort of not too far, you know. I'll come pick you up in my pickup truck. We'll go hang out. Do you think you'll have a...

Now that you're kind of feeling settled out there, do you start thinking about starting a family or no? Yeah, definitely. I'm getting married, so knock on wood, everything goes well with that. Maybe there'll be some – we'll see. We'll have to ask my fiancée. Oh, yeah. I think she would want to do that. Yeah, you got to include her. Yes, yes, for sure. No, I think that's a possibility for sure. For a while, did you think that that wasn't going to be a part of your life?

I was starting to question whether or not it was going to be part of my life because, you know, I mean, I think you kind of alluded to this earlier. You know, you want to, you know, if you're going to get married, you want to get married to somebody that you, you know, love and actually think that this could work.

you know, last forever, right? I was starting to question whether or not that was maybe possible. You know, I wasn't sure if that was possible anymore to find somebody that I thought would last forever with. But, you know, when I met Amanda, she's outside. I hope I'm getting some brownie points here, but I realized this is the one, you know? Wow. So, but it's, you know, until you meet that person, you know, it does start to feel kind of like, geez, this is getting a little kind of...

You know, uncertain here. Yeah, like I'm just watering. Yeah, yeah. So, but... Yeah, I think that's how I think about it. Because I think when you're younger, like you have this feeling of like this young love energy type of thing. And that starts to... It feels... That feels less possible the older we get, kind of. You know? It just starts to dissipate. Or it's like, oh, well, I just... I'm too...

wise now or i've had too much experience now that i'm never gonna have that sort of like whimsical feeling of like you know that a 17 year old or a 23 year old would have you know um but it's nice to know that that can kind of sneak up and surprise you you know yeah i think kind of i mean i think uh being home where i'm from help helped you know because it's like i don't know

I mean, if you're not from Los Angeles, then it's kind of a weird place. If you're from Los Angeles, it's normal. But if you're not from Los Angeles, you know, it's kind of a weird place. So, you know, you're here probably focused on your career and your work and so many other people are. It's kind of hard to, I think, find, you know, a good –

I'm not saying it's impossible, but it seems like it is kind of harder in this environment to find somebody that you can – I mean I don't know. Are people watching going – are we going to be taking relationship advice from me? I don't know. I don't know if that's – No. Well, no. It does make me think that I think there's this feeling in LA that if you meet somebody, you're going to have to eventually –

get them to leave here, right? I've always felt that thing, like, well, if I met somebody, would they ever leave here with me? Because I'm not going to stay here forever. Right. That's exactly what I was trying to say. So that, I think, is a... Yeah, I think that's totally common. But you said you...

You don't live here full time now? I live in Tennessee. I moved during the pandemic too. In Nashville? Yeah. Oh, cool. I moved during the pandemic. What was true? Whenever Trump was talking about Canada, what was, can you bring it up, Nick? I just want to know what he even was saying. Like, what were they threatening? They were threatening to tariff Canadian goods, just so our listeners can know what exactly was even going on. Yeah. They're going to put a tariff on every, you know, Canada is the largest trading partner of the United States. Yeah.

Nice. And so much of the goods that come into the United States from Canada

are being brought in by American businesses to, like wood. You bring wood and lumber in to build houses, right? So when you put a 25% tariff on lumber, that means everybody that... Flannel. If you're a big flannel company making flannel pajamas, all of a sudden flannel pajamas are going to be 25% more expensive. So it's really going to affect businesses on both sides of the border, obviously, not just Canada, but also everything will go up in price. So...

I'm not exactly sure the reason for it to be honest with you. He was really saying they weren't helping out with border security. Yeah. And that's what – the 30 days probation period, they did put a bunch of people at the border. Absolutely. I don't think there's a real border security problem between Canada and the United States though. It's –

You know, it's but that's the hardest country to get into in the world, I think, is Canada. Yeah. I mean, it's it's going that way. There isn't. That's for sure. Yeah, it's you know, the claim that there's fentanyl coming in to the United States from Canada, I think, is a little bit exaggerated because I don't really think that that's actually the case. Something like.

You know, a very small amount is coming in from Canada. Tariffs are a central part of Trump's economic plans. He promised to introduce import duties against some of America's main trade partners during his election campaign. He said tariffs will boost U.S. manufacturing and protect jobs as well as raising tax revenue and growing the economy. Fentanyl is linked to tens of thousands of overdose deaths.

taking bold action to hold mexico canada and china accountable to their promise of halting illegal immigration and stopping poisonous fentanyl and other drugs from flowing in our country it just seems kind of vague yeah i think it's sort of like uh but like what would you do like i'm trying to see say if you bring a bunch of stuff into my country right say if you and i live in different countries and you bring a bunch of stuff into my country i bring a bunch of stuff in your country and then you say okay i'm going to tax that more i'm going to charge you more to bring that in

If you don't help stop the fentanyl that's coming in. I just, I don't know. How would you then do that? What would you then on your side, would you say, okay, we'll put more what drug dogs and security along the border? I think that's what they're, I think that's what he's asking them to do. You know, and I think we already do have, again, I'm not, you know, I'm not a representative of the Canadian government, but I do, I do think that we already do have a lot of

There's only so much you can do to seal off a border, right? And I don't think there is that much fentanyl coming in from Canada, really. I never heard that that was a thing before. Yeah, I think it mostly does come in from the southern border. That's what I would think. I wonder if maybe you guys got grandfathered into some late-night Trump rhetoric there. Who knows? It feels a little bit like that. But hopefully it will resolve itself. I do think that it's probably going to end up –

a lot of economic problems on both sides of the border and probably they may not go for it. But

I mean, sports exciting for a while, though. Yeah, exactly. That's a side effect of it. It was a good fight right off the top of the game the other day. You know, it was pretty cool. We like a good hockey fight, so that's cool. And it is nice when countries sometimes don't get along a little bit in sports, right? I've always admired that. Yeah. That's one thing I don't like about the NBA anymore, that all the players, it just seems like they all know each other. Nobody's really playing for their squad sometimes. Okay. So I like a little bit more of that animosity. Maybe more fights in the NBA would be good. Physical fights. Yeah, look at that.

Oh, definitely. I believe both those players are American too. I'm not sure how quickly your researcher can tell us that, but even though they, the Canadian team, Canada didn't get the win in this game. I know that's not true at all. What I just said, but, uh,

I hope that Canada got the win in this game. But that's okay. Yeah, we lost the game, absolutely, which is really kind of – I know. But it is nice to see everybody having a good time watching a hockey fight, for sure. Yeah. Absolutely. What else did I see in the news that I just saw was happening? Oh, yeah. It was that contraception begins at erection now. Yeah.

So there's a law that they're pushing. Ohio Democratic lawmakers propose conception begins at erection. OK, OK. Yeah, they're trying to put it on the men a little bit more. So what exactly are they going to do about this now? Well, a new bill in Ohio would make it a crime for men to ejaculate without intending to have a baby. Oh, wow. That is that's definitely something that I could see happening.

A lot of people probably would be guilty of for sure. Hey, shoot is shoot, you know? Yeah. Yeah. I could see that being, I mean, I don't want to get in too much personal detail, but I think I'd probably be locked up for a long time. Hey, yeah. Oh, we're going to visit Tom this weekend again. Yeah. He's behind bars. Yeah. My gosh. I thought he was going to get paroled. Plenty of time to break the law in jail though. Yeah. Yeah.

And they put a monitor like wraps around your wiener and it just like, if it, it just goes off if it gets too hard. Now I'm assuming this is a parody site, but the world's so crazy right now that I'm actually asking this for real. Is this a real article? This is a real article right there. Yep.

Let's zoom in on, I'm going to read it a little bit. Okay. So this is not The Onion or something like that or Mad Magazine or something? No, this is one of those good radishes that they have out there. Conception begins, and it rhymes nicely too, conception begins at erection act. I mean, it's a nice rhyme to it, which is also nice. If you're going to penalize someone for an unwanted pregnancy, why not penalize the person who is also responsible for the pregnancy? Now, I can't say I don't agree with this. It's like,

Then you're going to have a lot more people. $10,000 per discharge. Ooh. That's... But here's the thing. Some dudes are just running around, skeeting or whatever they call it. And I don't know what they call it in different countries, but they're not going to have an extra 10K on them. You're going to have... The court system would be filled with every...

Every kid in the world, every 14-year-old kid. Yeah, I mean, I'm assuming, yeah, does this, I don't know how much I want to talk about this in detail with you. No, look, I'm going to say, you don't get pregnant on your own. Representative Anita Somani, Democrat, Dublin said. A felony for men to discharge semen without the intent to fertilize. That is...

Wow. Amazing, amazing idea. I mean, I actually would love to see that sort of applied that law just to see what would happen. I mean, it would be interesting to see what would happen. It's genital communism in a way, I guess. It's genital...

Is it? Absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. She introduced legislation that would make it a felony to discharge semen without the intent to fertilize. So, Monty and State Representative Tristan Rader joined forces to propose a bill nicknamed Conception Begins at Erection. There are some exceptions, such as when protection or contraceptions are used during sex. It also wouldn't apply when an individual is masturbating. Oh, okay. Donating sperm or... Lots of relief. Yeah. Or...

Or if the intercourse has taken place between members of the LGBT plus community and this doesn't produce over. So gay people would be able to just jerk off on each other and they don't suffer any of the consequences. But if us straights, if a couple of straights get caught.

This is unfair. Discharging. Yeah. This is unfair on so many levels. Well, it's just – it's beyond ridiculous what's going on here. Republican activist Austin Beigel laughed. It's a mockery of the most basic biological conceptions. And now I still – I'm sort of –

kind of can't believe this is a real article. Well, I think their purpose in this was saying if you think it's absurd to regulate men, that you think you should think it's equally absurd to regulate women. So Mani responded, I'm guessing that there was an original idea that... I see, I see. Okay, of course, yeah. About taking on reproductive rights for women. Absolutely. So, huh. I don't know, man. It's a good idea. I'd run up a tab, I know that. They're making a valid point when you put it that way, absolutely. I'd run up a tab. Yeah.

Did you, when you hosted SNL, what was that like for? Do you recall kind of some of the energy of that night? It was a wild, somewhat terrifying experience. You know, I had just gone through some pretty, I'd just gone through surgery like a few months ago. From testicular cancer? Yeah, yeah. And I'd had this lymph node dissection and I was kind of like, it had affected my sort of energy levels a lot. So it was kind of,

There was a lot going on in my life when I actually got the call to do that show and to do Saturday Night Live. And, you know, it was really cool, though. The thing that was cool about it was, you know, Lorne Michaels, who's Canadian, and I was just so kind of sort of...

kind of sort of overwhelmed that I was asked to do it, right? Yeah. And I had a couple of friends who I grew up with who worked on my show with me and I said, you know, can they come in and like kind of work with me and do some – help write some skits and stuff. So they gave us a little office and that stuff. We went in there. We were sort of writing skits up and everything. And, you know, they actually kind of ended up giving –

me a lot of kind of creative freedom on the show to kind of write sketches and stuff. And, you know, in hindsight, I kind of wish they hadn't. Like they had just written them themselves? Yeah, well, because we really kind of made some really weird fucking sketches, you know? I think maybe it would have been cool if I maybe I'd just gone in and done the stuff that they had written. But like I was sort of definitely, you know,

Freddie Got Fingered hadn't come out yet. So like I was still kind of riding high on this hit show and we come in and we say, OK, now let's write some crazy sketches, right? And I mean the stuff we wrote was really, really weird, you know? Were you intent on making it weird? I think we were, yeah. Like how weird can we make this? It's SNL. Let's make it ours. I think so. I think so.

And, you know, sometimes I think there was a misperception maybe among some of the cast that I brought my own writers in, which wasn't really the case. It was more like it was my buddies and they'd come up with me with the show. You know, it was kind of like we were...

When we made the show in Canada, some of my friends came down with me to the States. This is part of the team. It's not just Tom Brady. I want them to be included in the show. So we kind of went in and did that. But, I mean, it was an amazingly exciting experience. I mean, my parents were there on stage with me. It was one of those things where you kind of –

Can't believe that it actually happened while it was happening. And I did a lot of sketches with Will Ferrell. Here's an example of something that I – I wouldn't say I regret this, but I kind of regret this. So there was a sketch where I'm a wizard and I'm holding a pig, like an actual pig.

And it was Molly Shannon and Will. Wow. And I'm a wizard. And I didn't really have any lines in the sketch or many lines in the sketch. It was mostly Will and Molly were doing this sketch. But I noticed during rehearsal that if I just kind of lightly sort of tickled the pig's belly with my finger –

that it would start to squeal extremely loud, right? And so I did that once during rehearsal and then somebody said, oh, you better not, you know, she'll squeal if you touch her belly. And so I said, okay. And there's a rehearsal show and then there's the actual show, right?

And, you know, I kind of maybe regret this, but I did note that, okay, let's get through the rehearsal show. But then live, I'm going to make that pig squeal. Yeah. Oh, yeah, sister. It did kind of. I made pig. No, but it was kind of, it kind of threw the sketch off a little bit. You just fucking kept squealing that? I realized that it did kind of throw the rhythm of the.

of the comedy off a little bit, but, uh, how many times did you squeal? It was just sort of became sort of a bit of a, a bit of a mess, but, uh, and were, were you getting a squeal every time he touched his belly or do you have to really, no, I just had to kind of just lightly sort of pet her there. And she would just try. Yeah.

But it was amusing to me, but I'm not sure if anybody else enjoyed it that much. Oh, yeah. My sister's like that. If you touch her lunch, you know, she fucking gets a little animated. If you grab any of her takis out of her little dish. Right. It was like that. Yeah. So, but, you know, it was an amazing experience. I was total honored to be able to do it. And, you know, I mean, I...

It was cool. I mean the cast was Jimmy Fallon, Tina Fey, Will Ferrell, Chris Kattan, Molly Shannon, Anna Gasteyer. Dang. Tracy Morgan and – there was –

It's a weird environment like Saturday Night Live, especially when you're young and you don't really know. Like, you know, we were talking earlier about like going to – you were talking about going to Chris Rock's party and like you didn't know how to act or whatever because there's all these people here and it's kind of complicated. Yeah. So you're getting thrust into an environment like that and then it's –

even as the host, it sort of felt like kind of a competitive environment because all the cast members are trying to write sketches and get them on the air every week. And I didn't really know how it worked really at the time. In hindsight, I now realize how it works and I might have done things differently. But when we were trying to put these sketches on the air that we were writing, maybe that was kind of pushing another sketch off and we didn't really – I wasn't really thinking of it like that. So it kind of created – it's kind of a weird environment and

The more I kind of hear people on podcasts who have been on the show talk about the show, it seems like everybody has gone through that experience who has been on that show where it's very competitive and stressful for people. That makes me feel a little bit better about my experience there because it was kind of a stressful experience because you know everybody is going to be watching the show. It's live and I'm –

You're doing all this weird stuff that's not necessarily – I'm a little bit out of my element. I didn't do sketch comedy. Yeah, that's scary. So it was – but it was cool. It was cool. It sounds like it's par for the course a little because, yeah, I mean even Adam Sandler the other night was singing. He had a musical tribute that he did to the 50 years and –

He referenced a couple times about people having sketches that they wrote that didn't get on the show. So I think that seems like it was just a weekly occurrence. And of course, you want to go in there with a little bit more comfort zone for yourself. It's like, yeah, if we can write a couple of them or we can have some manipulation over them, it's probably going to make you feel more comfortable. Another thing that was weird that happened on the show, so like –

So there was a sketch that I did. It's called a sketch like I did with Will Ferrell where we're both dressed as eagles. And this was one of the ones that my friends and I wrote. OK. It's sort of hard to sort of say that we wrote it. But the sketch was, you know, Jimmy Fallon and Molly Shannon are looking at Will and I who are eagles, right? We wrote this out, by the way, on paper and handed it in. And then they said to do it.

And then Will and I decide to fly up into the audience, okay? And I thought it would be fun to go in the audience. So we fly into the audience and then we chew up carrots and then I believe Will chews up a carrot and I believe he sort of spits the carrot into my mouth and then kind of

We end up sort of, because you know how baby birds will chew up the food and feed it. Mother birds will chew up the food and make it easier for the baby to eat. So this was the sketch we did.

Oh, yeah. But so. Oh, God. So somehow I kind of maybe probably would have been better if we just kind of did the sketches that their writers had written. Oh, God. Yeah. And these are both males, huh? Yeah. So we're doing this. Yeah, exactly. So we're doing this. What zoo is that at, huh? That's what I'm talking about. That's the West Hollywood Aquarium right there, brother. I'll tell you that, huh? Yeah. So we're doing this sketch, this skit.

And so when you host the show, you got to run to get ready for the next sketch because you got to take off your eagle costume and put on another costume, right? And so I'm running down the stairs and I'm running through the backstage area and just sitting in the darkness, just backstage, Tom Hanks is just sitting there in front of a monitor watching the show. And I'm in the eagle costume. I'd just done that. I make eye contact with Tom Hanks. So now I'm like –

I was already kind of nervous. Now, like, I got Tom Hanks in the dark watching, and I'm going like, how did that eagle sketch go? You know? And I'm sort of getting ready for the next sketch. Not sure how the eagle sketch went, and Tom Hanks is watching. So it kind of throws you a little bit. But then there's a big after party after the show, and Tom Hanks was real nice, and he, you know, was hanging out talking to my parents and stuff. Oh, that's cool. It was pretty cool. But no, it was an amazing thing. It's a...

It's the kind of thing, though, like it's kind of like you go, geez, it would be nice to be able to do it again someday. Because I think like doing it the first time is sort of so – I don't know that that would ever happen. But probably in an alternate universe, I might be able to do it again someday. But like you go, OK, I sort of understand how the system of it works now. And it would be probably – I probably would not have done that.

Yeah. But also it's great that you did though. It's so epic. Yeah. And yeah, I think you're right about that. It's like a lot of things in life. You're like, man, I wish I had gotten a trial run or I had a little bit of an idea of how the feelings were or what the energy was like in that space or that room or like,

man there's been things you go out on a stage part of a show or a banquet some type of thing and you you just play play the room totally wrong you know that didn't seem like that but there's definitely times like that in life and you wish you're like man i wish i'd get one more swing at it yeah yeah but and you know i think that uh you know that uh generally you can

at least take those lessons and apply them to something else. Oh yeah, for sure. So yeah. Did, was Michael Jackson there whenever you guys played? Who was y'all's musical guest? No, it was not Michael Jackson, but that would have been amazing if it was Michael Jackson. No, it was David Gray.

Oh, yeah. But, man, it would have been amazing. No, nothing against David Gray, but have you ever had Michael Jackson? I've seen David Gray play. Have you ever interacted with Michael Jackson in any way? No. No, that would have been amazing. But, yeah, he was great. I would love to see –

Another weird thing that happened on the show. One thing that was weird that happened on the show. So I was backstage getting ready for the show. I don't even know if I should tell this story. I don't even know if I should tell this story. Maybe it's not. Let's talk about something else. It's a weird story. Don't worry. Yeah, Tom Hanks was there the other night. I didn't get to see him. Oh, I got to see Madonna. She's little. Okay. Where was that? Such a little baby carrot. What? Yeah.

She was at that SNL thing. Oh, okay. Yeah. It was just interesting. So were you chatting with Madonna? No, no, no, no, no. She's quite interesting on TikTok these days. Oh, is she? She does some pretty sort of out there stuff on her TikTok. I got to follow her. I got to check her out. When you have these –

You beat cancer, right? Has it flared back up? What's that been like? No, it's completely gone. Did they have to take out one of your gonads or not? One testicle, yeah. My right testicle and some lymph nodes as well. And what are the lymph nodes like? Is that actually in the testicle or is that in the body? No, the lymph nodes are actually...

behind your intestines and they have to like, they cut me up here and they had to remove those. And that was just to check to see if the cancer had spread into them. Wow. And, you know, the only way they could really check and know for 100% sure if it had spread was to take them out and look at them under a microscope and stuff. So they had not spread. So then that meant I did not have to have chemo and stuff. But they did take my right testicle, which was honestly like when I found out, the show was on MTV at the time. And you have it still. Yeah, I did not keep it like,

but that is it in a plastic bag right there. How many ounces is it? Do you know? I don't remember weighing it exactly, but I know it's quite heavy for sure. Oh, hell yeah. I can give you that. But, uh, yeah, no, we don't have no light testicles around here. But, uh, we filmed the whole, uh, the whole, um, sort of, uh,

surgery and for a show on MTV. That's actually the whole show there, the cancer special, which is on YouTube. But when you'd see my documentary on prime too, where it kind of walks through that whole, that's Glenn Humplick, who was the, my friend and co-host on the show. And here he is sort of after my surgery coming down and, and playing with my testicle. A little bit of sashimi there. It's a little sashimi. Yeah. He says what he says. It sort of looks like chicken. And then my mom says, I don't know what kind of chicken you're eating. Yeah. So that is my cancer infected testicle right there.

But I still have the left one. It's the middle one now. I can still ejaculate just a little. No, it's pretty good, actually. Heck yeah, dude. It's going to cost you $10,000 if you drive over to Ohio and do it. I'll tell you that, bro. Look, as long as you stop in Mishawaka and do it. Only $5,000 for me. Oh, yeah, that's true.

Which is a benefit in Ohio to have testicular cancer. You can kind of – God, brother. The tariffs they would rack up, they'd make a million bucks a night in that state. That's not a bad idea. No, not a bad idea for sure. Did you ever wear a prosthetic testicle? It was offered and I refused to do it. I did not refuse but I just sort of opted out on the prosthetic. Did you ever look at them at least?

I think I did. Yeah, I think I did. This was, you know, 20 years ago. But I'd heard – the doctor kind of said, you know, a lot of people get them, don't like it. They say it kind of sort of feels weird or whatever. So I just figured, no, I don't need one. Yeah. You know, but I mean, I don't know how much you want to talk about my ball sack. But I mean, it doesn't really seem that much different like down there. Like, I mean – Oh, I could imagine that too. As you're talking – It kind of all just kind of sort of morphs into kind of like a – because like the –

Like they don't like – they don't actually like go through the scrotum to get the testicle. You know that? Like they don't actually cut the scrotum. Oh, no. No, they go in. They cut you like up sort of up here like under your pubics hair kind of thing. Under your pubes. They go in there and then they kind of go in and they just sort of shuck it out like an oyster from above. Yeah. So it's sort of not really –

Like the scrotum is completely intact. Like there's not some sort of scarred scrotum or anything. Like I don't have a scarred up scrotum. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like it's totally normal scrotum. Yeah, good. Yeah, like there's a little scar up here. But I'd had a hernia operation before when I was like younger. So they just went through the same thing. So it's like you wouldn't – just a little scar there. Yeah, so. A lot of hernias in Canada too. What country has the most hernias you think? Yeah.

That is interesting. I never thought about that. But is there a lot in Canada? A lot of my friends in Canada have had hernias. A lot of your friends in Canada have had hernias, really? Yeah, I'm just wondering. I'd be curious to see if there's more in Canada. That would be certainly an interesting statistic for sure. According to available data, countries in South Asia and sub-Saharan Africa tend to have the highest prevalence of hernias.

Canada might be. Particularly in regions with lower socioeconomic status with countries like India and parts of Tanzania showing significantly higher rates compared to high-income nations. This is largely due to factors like limited access to health care and higher rates of manual labor. Wow. I gave myself a hernia on my show live on the public. It was on the public access version of the show years before we were on MTV. And...

It was kind of a strange episode, probably one of the weirder ones, where we said, okay, I'm going to break the Guinness Book of World Records for the longest fingernails. You know, you've never seen those? Oh, yeah. We used to see them all the time. This is a strange bit. And the Chinese kid on the bikes, remember that? Yeah. That world record book? Yeah. They'd have a 15 or 16, a whole just a starter pack of Asians hanging off a bike. Exactly. Exactly.

So for whatever reason, this doesn't even sound like it could even possibly make sense to describe it. But the idea was, okay, I'm going to – it was Glenn and myself. It's a live show. It was on community cable. It's not on a big network. So it was sort of late at night and we said, okay, what we're going to do is we're going to try to break the record for longest fingernails. I had a bunch of milk. It was calcium and I set it up all very seriously and then I start drinking milk.

And then for the entire hour, I just basically drank milk and kind of

stared at my fingernails for an hour and didn't do anything, right? Just kind of progressively got a little bit more kind of sort of weird. And then towards the end of the show, I kind of stood up and started thrashing around sort of somewhat violently. I don't know. There's no real logical reason for it. It was like a milk overdose or something. And I started doing this thrashing and I hit the desk and I flipped the desk over and

And I felt something pop in my abdomen and then we went off the air and I went up to the bathroom and my intestine was like pushing out through my abdomen and went to the hospital and I had given myself a hernia. So that's how that happened. Was that probably the worst accident you ever endeared? No, probably.

The worst one ever was just two years ago. I stepped on a fire on the beach in Costa Rica. The old fire step, huh? It had been buried under sand. Oh.

And I walked up to this bonfire and the edge of the fire had been buried and my foot went into it. And yeah, I got third degree burns on both my feet. I thought that was a couple to-go sandwiches. Yeah. No. Yeah. It was – that was maybe the worst –

And that was just three years ago. I almost lost my foot. So I was – You just had to lay in bed for a while, huh? For 10 days in a Costa Rican hospital and then I was medevaced on an air ambulance back to Canada actually and spent another –

week and a half in the hospital there. And yeah, my foot's pretty messed up right now, but it's better. It's better. Not 100%, but I've had a few good injuries. That was, oh, there they go. There they are. Yeah. Oh my gosh. You found the unedited version. Yeah. Yeah. That, that, wow. Look at that. Yeah, it was, and look at this, the top of my foot. Wow. The bottom of the foot ain't good either. Those are sexy. I'll spend 10 grand on those things, huh? Yeah.

Look out, Ohio. Jeez. Yeah. My God. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Those are my feet right there. That was just, that was maybe coming up on three years ago now. So yeah, that was, that was maybe the worst injury ever. So yeah. Um,

So the show that you have now, you have the special that's out. Yeah, yeah. It all came out just a few weeks ago. The 28th or something, when was it? Yeah, yeah. It's all on Amazon Prime. On Prime. This is the Tom Green documentary. And then the stand-up special.

It's called I Got a Mule. I got a mule. I talked about my life on the farm and getting my mule. And then the show, which is – it's a four-episode sort of series of me moving to the farm called Tom Green Country. And I recorded all the music for the show as well. There's a country album that I put out, which is the soundtrack for the show, which is called Home to the Country, which is on Spotify. It's called what? It's called Home to the Country. Home to the Country. It's the name of the album. And –

And that's out on music, wherever you get music now. And then I'm on tour. I'm actually on tour. I'm getting back in the camper van and we're going to start doing a

A little bit more camping and touring around with my fiance up through the desert. And then we'll be picking up the tour again March 14th in Colorado. And it'll be Colorado Springs, Aspen, upwards to, you know, up through, where are we going? Indianapolis, St. Louis. All the dates are on my website, but Chicago. And so touring and driving back to Canada. And then I'll be riding my mule all summer. So when are you in Ottawa? Yeah.

I'm going to be in Ottawa. I'm not sure, actually. I think sometime before the, I guess, May, maybe. Oh, cool, cool. But I'll have to let you know before I'm going to come. Yeah, I will definitely. It'll be so cool to come see the farm. Yeah. Do you think, like, with a lot of the new stuff you're shooting now or some of the stuff that I see on your YouTube channel, it's a little bit more artistic in some way? I don't know if that's a word. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, it's definitely like not something that I expect to really go viral in a lot of ways because it's like very long form stuff that I just really like shooting like that. I mean – Yeah, do you notice – like almost – it almost seems like it's almost like you'd want to shoot like a feature, like a movie. I can't tell. I don't know because sometimes we have things that start to happen and then it becomes something else. But when I'm watching it, I feel like I'm –

getting into a, I'm getting into a world. Yeah. That's what it feels like. Yeah. That's cool. That's cool. I mean, like to know that you watched it because it sort of is sort of,

It's not like a mainstream comedy sort of piece that I'm putting on my YouTube channel right now. It's, you know, I want to kind of just capture what it feels like being out in the desert and in these amazing places or being on the farm with the animals. And so, you know, I like shooting and capturing images that are sort of calming and beautiful. And it is the kind of thing that...

You know, it's – the show is not like that. The show is – there's a lot more going on. But there is something nice about just kind of putting it on and sitting back and just kind of like – it's like an ASMR type of thing. Yeah, that's what it feels like. It's like ASMR for your eyes kind of. Yeah, yeah. So it's interesting. I mean I think a lot of it started just as me kind of like really trying to experiment with the cameras and just trying to figure out how to make these cameras work.

work and capture the sort of the cinematography the way I want to capture it and I think that maybe it may evolve into something a little bit more faster paced at some point but right now it's just it's just a lot of this sort of slice of life stuff that I put up on the YouTube channel and

And, you know, I have a podcast that I do, you know, one episode every six months or something like that. I might start doing the podcast again and putting that up to kind of give people something a little bit more familiar to watch. But right now, yeah, that's what it is. And I just – I kind of just enjoy taking people to these places. I mean I find it interesting that like, you know, everything is so fast-paced now. Like, you know, everything is so – people's attention spans are so short now.

It's kind of interesting to sort of do something that's kind of not that. And again, it's not – the algorithm doesn't really work in its favor. You have to say something shocking within the first 10 seconds and then put some words on the screen and do all these things that you can do to really capture large audiences. But if you do watch it –

You sort of do kind of get sucked into a little secret universe in a way. There's even little messages sometimes I'll put like 45 minutes into a video that will – if you made it that far, then you might say something in the comments and then I'll know that you actually watched 45 minutes. And so there is a lot of people that do get it, which is fun. And it's kind of neat to – it's impossible to capture the energy of what it's like out there in nature without

by doing something fast-paced because so much of what's amazing about it is just the calm stillness of it all. So that's what it is on the YouTube channel. It's a bit different, but... I think people are as desperate for that as they've ever been in some ways. I think things have gotten... We're operating at a speed that we don't even feel comfortable in sometimes, you know? Our brains are having to. But yeah, that's what it feels like. It feels like some type of an ASMR or some... It feels calming, man. That's what it feels like. And yeah, I'm just curious because you're always...

You've just always been a creator, you know? You're just always creating. You're always finding some way to, I don't know if it's infect, to incite, to get a reaction out of people. Yeah. In some type of way. Yeah. It's cool. It's weird today because there's so much energy online, like so much craziness and pranks and just, you know, like.

you know, just the insanity that you can see every day on your phone. Like before you get out of bed, you're just like, you know, if you pick up your phone and you get that in your head too early in your day, your whole day can be just kind of, but you started it. Well, it's just crazy, but it's okay. It's not a judgment. You know, technology was changing at the same time, but we're glad you did, man. We're glad you did, man. Tom, thanks so much for all the entertainment over the years. And, uh,

Yeah, man. I just appreciate you spending time with me. Congratulations on the new engagement. Thank you. Thank you for having me on the show, Theo. I mean, it's awesome, man. I love the show and I just appreciate you having me on. Yeah, I want to come pet that donkey, man, when I get up there. Absolutely. Come pet the donkey, man. You will. I'll be up there. Okay. All right. Thanks, Tom. Thanks, man. Now I'm just floating on the breeze and I feel I'm falling like these leaves. I must be a stone. Oh,

But when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace of mind I found I can in my bones.