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cover of episode Esther Calling - My Partner's Privilege

Esther Calling - My Partner's Privilege

2021/11/11
logo of podcast Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

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Esther Perel
女听众
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女听众:讲述了与男友不同的成长背景,以及由此产生的怨恨情绪。她来自中东,在单亲家庭长大,经济条件较差;而男友则在富裕的美国郊区长大。她意识到这种不平等,并因此感到愤怒和怨恨,并以被动攻击的方式表达出来,例如对男友的小事吹毛求疵。她将这种怨恨投射到男友身上,认为男友不理解她的不易,并享受着不公平的优势。 她还谈到了财务方面的差异,例如男友的父亲能够负担得起会计师的费用,而她则需要自己支付高昂的费用。这些差异加剧了她的怨恨情绪。她意识到自己对男友的怨恨中包含着嫉妒和对自身经历的反思。她既羡慕男友的优越条件,又为自己的坚韧和成就感到自豪。她担心如果这段关系结束,自己将回到艰难的生活,这加剧了她的嫉妒情绪。 她还谈到了与男友在浪费和节俭方面的差异,以及她如何试图改变男友的行为习惯,但实际上是试图解决她内心的冲突。 Esther Perel:指出女听众的怨恨背后隐藏着失落、渴望和嫉妒等情绪。她指出女听众也做出了选择,并欣赏男友身上的某些特质,例如他的好奇心、对女听众生活的兴趣以及他来自一个强大的家庭。她指出女听众与男友共同的经历是家庭破裂带来的痛苦,这让她与男友产生共鸣。她认为这段关系中存在的差异是无法解决的问题,双方需要学习如何共同生活。这段关系中存在的差异将持续存在,双方需要学会欣赏彼此的不同之处。她指出女听众要求男友改变生活方式,实际上是试图解决她内心的冲突。

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A woman struggles with resentment towards her partner due to their vastly different upbringings and the privilege her partner has had. She discusses how this resentment manifests and affects their relationship.

Shownotes Transcript

This time there is no couch, but instead an unexpected phone call from Esther to a woman who is struggling with the differences between her and her partner's upbringing. He grew up in a comfortable suburb, she grew up having less, much less. She loves her boyfriend but wants to get past the resentment she feels towards the opportunities he’s had. Esther helps her think through how these differences might also play into new strengths between them.

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