Chelsea Handler: The Opposite Of Patience
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Please tell them. Oh, you are? You're skiing? I'm so excited. Where are you? Tell me everything. I'm in Whistler. I'm in Whistler. That's your place too, isn't it? It is my place. I am so jealous right now. I knew you would be. Welcome to Literally. Thanks for joining us. And tell your friends if they have not subscribed, if they have not imbibed.

And all of those things that we got a good thing going on here. And I'm glad you guys are joining me because today is a good one. Today is Chelsea Handler. I mean, there's literally nobody like her. I fell in love with Chelsea with her first book. Hello, Vodka. It's me, Chelsea. The great titles of a book. It might be the best title of a book ever.

And some books, stand-up talk shows. She's done it all. I'm not going to lie. It's sometimes interesting to see her half naked on Instagram. Let's face it. And we're about to talk about anything and everything. Also, one of the great skiers, one of the great celebrity skiers, Stay Tuned. And I like saying the word Stay Tuned because nobody's tuned anything anymore. But it makes me sound like

It's a professional show that I grew up listening to. Stay tuned for Chelsea Handler. Tell me, how's the skiing? It's pretty great. I mean, today I was skiing pretty kind of not great because there was no visibility. So it threw me a little bit off my game, which I did not appreciate. It's my 24th day of skiing this year. So I moved up here. Like, I bought a place here before the election, just in case things went south. Wow.

And then I was like, with COVID, I'm like, okay, I got to get out of LA. We are the worst. So I got a gig in Canada, like a residency at a theater in Vancouver where I'm supposed to perform once a week. And I was like, oh, perfect. That's work visa. So I came and now I'm not performing because they still haven't lifted the restrictions. I love everything about that plan.

Um, everything about the plant and the way the plant's going is just, everything is working in my favor. It's almost like I've done something good in another life. You know what I mean? Yeah. You're, you're, you're reaping the rewards. How has the snow been this year?

It's been good. When I first got here, I quarantined for two weeks and it snowed for two weeks straight. So there was a nice base. And now there's like 25 centimeters. I now talk in centimeters because I'm Canadian for winter. Yes, exactly. It's coming this weekend, tomorrow. So that'll be great.

I'm with Kelly, our ski guy that we share and Ben. Yes. The whole crew. Yeah. It's real fun. Oh my God. I mean, I ski every day. I just go out to the end of the road and ski down and go. I mean, it's heaven. Heaven.

Oh, you're living your best life. You always kind of live your best life. I think, I mean, nobody has more of an adventurous spirit than you, I think. Oh, well, thank you very much. I take that as a compliment. Right? I mean, you do your thing. You get out there and you live life and you do what you want to do. And tell me about the, I know that with COVID you can't do it, but the residency thing.

Because you hadn't done stand-up in a long time, right? Until recently. Yeah, until recently. And then I was like, oh, I just filmed a special for HBO Max. And I was like, oh, now. So once you film something, you have to start again. And I was like, oh, this will be perfect. I can go practice in Canada every Saturday night. I do two shows at the Vogue Theater, it's called.

And they have like, you know, limited seating because of COVID. So it's like 73 people a show or something. I'm like, perfect. I can warm up my material in Canada. But now that I've been in Canada, like I have a lot of Canadian material just for Canadians. You know, I'm obsessed with Canada because we always think that it's just like us. It's nothing like us.

No, they're civilized, actually. It's like nobody's yelling in the middle of a CVS about wearing a mask. You know what I mean? No one's doing that in Canada. It was like after COVID and the election and all of that, like the last four years of just such, you know, whatever, chaos. It felt like I was, when I came to Canada, it felt like I was welcomed to civilization. It was like, oh, this is where people are respectful to one another.

Yeah. Tell, I'm curious, what other differences do you find in Canada? The, a lot of the Canadian women and the couples are really like they're, they're running the show, like on the serious tip, like Canadian men are, are a little bit,

More timid, I would say they're more willing to like take the back seat, which I think is more masculine because that's just what's going to happen anyway. You know, you're married. You understand what happens. Oh, yeah. It's, you know, happy wife, happy life. You know, being married is sort of like picking what hill are you going to are you willing to die on? And the answer is I'm not willing to die on many hills.

Really? I'm not. And the Canadian guys, I guess you're telling me have figured that out.

Yeah, they're just like, listen, we don't want to cause any trouble. We don't want to rock the boat. That's the general vibe of Canadian men. I mean, it's not like I'm meeting a lot of single men. So maybe their vibe is different because of COVID. You know, you can't like even if you go to Christine's for lunch, it's like you're separated. You can't mingle. You know, everyone's masked up skiing. So it's not the greatest year for romance. But listen, that would just be the icing on the cake. Right. I mean, I can't be that greedy. Yeah.

You can't have everything. No, I mean, I'd rather just be single and joyful. You know what I mean? 100%. Let me ask you a question. So what happens in – and then we'll stop skiing stuff. I could talk about skiing forever. What happens with like gondolas and stuff? Like I ski in Snowbird a lot in Utah, and they're famous for their giant tram. What happens?

which was always disgusting. It was always gross. It was always people packed in literally like sardines and the, but now I can't even imagine anybody doing it. How do you get up and down the mountain? How's it work? Well, there are rules. I mean, it's strict, you know, I mean, because you can't get on a gondola with someone you don't know. Like even Kelly isn't supposed to be, my ski guide is not supposed to be in my gondola with me, but

You know, we do that anyway because it's ridiculous and we're in the same bubble at this point. So a lot of bubbles going around, a lot of bubbles. But yeah, you don't get on, like it's one person. So it takes a long time in the morning. The lines are really long in the morning to board because, you know, it goes so slowly. Plus you have to distance online. So a fascinating topic of conversation for your listeners. I know that my numbers are plummeting by the moment, but-

I don't care. This is why we do a podcast. We get to, this is, you know, I mean, you did a talk show. You had to suffer people you didn't want to talk to, I'm sure, and talk about things you don't want to talk about.

And they just haul ass. Like we say hello. It's like literally 30 seconds and they just start hauling ass into in towards seventh heaven. And I'm racing, like trying to catch up with them. And I can't, I'm like, Oh my God, get your shit together. I'm like trying to put my music on, get my,

gloves on. And so I'm like trying to catch up, catch up. We go on the chairlift, we go up and they just haul ass down the mountain. I'm like, all right, hold on a second. I'm like, let me step. I was a little stoned, you know, I had just woken up. So I was like, let me step on it a little bit. Yeah. Shit together.

And then finally I was like catching up with them and catching up. And then finally I beat both of them. And as I'm passing the 75 year old, I was thinking, what are you doing? Like, what are you doing? Are you racing a 75 year old woman down a ski mountain right now? And then I was like, you can't do that. That's just too lame. And so that was the end of it. I, I, I, when I first met Arnold Schwarzenegger,

I met him on the ski mountain. It was the same thing as like, hey, a bunch of people are going to get together to ski. And I didn't know Arnold was going to be there. I'd never met Arnold, didn't know Arnold. And it was clear when I showed up and was introduced that he wasn't thrilled to see me either. He was like, I was, no, make no mistake. I was excited to see Arnold, Arnold Schwarzenegger, get to meet Arnold. But I could tell when he looked at me, he was like, oh, great. You know, he's another one of these Hollywood pussies who doesn't know how to ski. Yeah.

It was like, oh yeah. Right. And I do know how to ski. So it became clear as we were going down the first run that like,

I can ski. He can ski. Oh, he's good. I'm good. By halfway down, it was an out and out, mano a mano race to the finish. Yeah. And I remember I got to the front of the... There was nobody at the bottom of the chairlift, but I stopped at the little gates where you would enter the chairlift. Like, I won. And Arnold...

blew past me to the actual chairlift, got on the chairlift and went up and I never saw him again. And I was like, well, that's a baller move. He just, he just like, he literally just made the finish line a lot farther away. And that's how we became friends is through skiing. I also got to ski with Clint Eastwood once. That was pretty fun. Oh yeah. How's he as a skier? Methodical.

Yeah, I would imagine so. Really? But like, you know, Clint's, how old is Clint now? He's, is it possible Clint's 90? Is that possible? I think he's closer to 200. 290. That's what it is. Yes, 290. But listen, my hat, you know, skiing's brutal, man. You fall and you're like, I'm now ski, like I ski like a 56 year old breadwinner. That's like when people say, what category are you?

I'm the guy who can't tear a meniscus. I can't. Yeah, I have a torn meniscus. Actually, no, I got my meniscus fixed and I'm skiing on it and it's pain. I mean, I got it fixed. It's worse than before I got it fixed. They say you don't need to get that surgery always. And I was like, no, anything you can get surgically fixed, I want surgically fixed because I love to ski so much. And now I have to get it drained every week. It's a hot mess. I mean, you should see what I have to do just to go skiing to my knee. You know...

As we get older, we're supposed to gravitate to like...

sun vacations and like water and not be cold and the wind beating the crap out of us and flat light and, you know, breaking a rib. But no, you and I are dumb and we're just sticking with it, aren't we? Yeah, I'd like to step it up a lot, a little bit, you know, like physically as I get older, I'm stronger. I'm more mentally like sound, you know, I'm like more competent and everything. So I definitely don't want to like, you know, segue into lawn bowling or anything prematurely.

No, we're not going to do that. I don't think anybody wants to see that. I want to ask you... I'm going to jump around a little bit, but tell me about your experience working with Playboy. Did you... It was in 2009, right? Is that when you did a cover for them? Am I making this up? No, I think Chewy and I... Chewy was my co-host on Chelsea Lately, my sidekick. Yes, right. He was a little...

nugget friend. And he and I did a Christmas cover of Playboy where we were like, he was dressed as Sansa and I was, we weren't, it wasn't a typical Playboy cover. I don't think. Damn it. Oh, God damn it. Oh yeah. It was a cover, but it was like a holiday special fun. Yeah. So it was one of those. I'm naked all the time in regular life. I know. I know. Why would I do that? Well, that's, it's so counterintuitive. You're like, I know I'm going to do Playboy, but not be naked. Right. Like on my morning show,

hello, selfie. I'm going to be naked. I like the way that you- Yeah. I like to keep people on their toes. I know. I like that. See, I was hoping you did one of those like Jamie Freetog. He was always the photographer. Not that I read a lot of Playboy when I was a young boy. Why would I have ever done that? No, of course not. He was always the photographer, Jamie Freetog. I was like, I want to grow up to be Jamie Freetog. He's shooting all these beautiful women and

Just amazing. So you did the Playboy cover that I would not have bought. That was the one. It was like, you know, funny. It wasn't sexy. I wasn't, I wasn't sexy, but it was more funny than sexy. I wasn't buying Playboy for the, for the funny. No, it was, you know, you know, well, I was just trying to give you a little extra credit there, Rob. I know. I know. I, I only evolved into that guy recently. You know, when I was 15, I was, you know, like a typical 15 year old idiot. So insane. What, yeah,

Tell me, you know what I loved also, by the way, about doing your show when you were doing your talk shows? You had your dog in the studio during the interviews. It was the greatest thing ever. Yeah. Did they ever like, what was their greatest moment? Was there ever like a...

Probably going to the bathroom while a guest was talking, you know, and behind them. And then Kevin Hart came on and my dog went nuts on him. And Kevin was like, your dog's racist. And I was like, he is actually like it was obvious that at that moment we know that he was there was no denying it. And so that was really funny because Kevin just was like, you know, Kevin and I are really good friends and we had never discovered that my dog was racist. He's no longer with us.

But I have two new dogs. Actually, I brought them up here with me, Bert and Bernice. They're with me in Whistler. And I've never been alone with them for this amount of time. So it's a real adjustment period because they think I'm like the nanny and that my cleaning lady is the main person at my house. Right. So they love her. So if I want to like get their attention, I have to speak in her accent to them and be like, Bert, you're a good boy.

You know, like the whole thing that happens here. And they're so pissed that they're alone with me because they know that like I'm not really as capable as she is of like, you know, giving them all the things that they need. Do they go in the snow? My dogs hate weather of any sort.

They're like complete wimps. And, and so I, my dogs would, would not, you, if they were in the snow, they would go out, stand there, look at me. Like, are you crazy? Not go to the bathroom, come back into the house and go to the bathroom everywhere. That's what I would have. I'm on a similar kind of schedule, actually. Funny you mentioned that. Yeah. So I don't, they're not, they're definitely not happy from transitioning from Belair to, to Whistler. Like they're, they, they were very confused for the first couple of weeks.

And so they're slowly adapting. But, you know, it's not like I'm spending a ton of time taking them around. I'm skiing when I can. So I should be a little bit more mindful of just like try and take them on those walks. You know what I mean? Like long walks and parks and do all of the things that, you know, real good dog parents do. But it's it's it's the snow is not is no joke with little animals.

Well, no. And there's also coyotes everywhere. I hear them everywhere. Hey, I have a question for you because I was just talking to Kelly about this because we're all kind of in the same age group. Yeah. Yeah. We were talking about like how much less ego maniacal you become as you get older. And I was thinking when we, because I was doing your podcast today, I was thinking, oh, I bet that's interesting to talk to Rob about because you had to be, because when we're young, our egos are so huge. And when you have such fame at such a young age, you must be a total maniac.

Right. Like it's in the water for sure. It's part of the, it's part of the cocktail. Yeah. And when you look back at yourself and the things you did when you were that age, aren't you mortified? I have a whole filmography I can be mortified by. I mean, all I got to do is hit Google. Google exists only to mortify me. Um, really, um,

And, you know, it's like, but I also think it's the way anybody is, but because if you're famous, it's just, it's exponentially bigger issue, right? So, like, I think, I know my kids at 22 think crazy, self-centered thoughts. Right, right. And then you add fame on top of it, and you're like, you know, it can be totally ugly. But you were like, when your first...

How old were you when you sort of got your first break? I don't know. It was like a series of small breaks, you know, that would probably go unnoticed to other people. But for me, it felt like momentum. And then I think I did a, I did a couple of shows and then I did Chelsea lately, which ended up being a big one. And so, yeah, from then on. So I think I was like 32 when I started that show. Maybe I have no sense of time, so I could have been 12.

How do you mark sense of time? I'm the same. Like the 80s are not marked by years for me. They're marked by the movies I did in the 80s. And then the 90s are marked by what was going on with my kids.

I have no sense of like a reflection of your own age. Right. So when you have children, like that's your marker, you know, right away that you're old because you have a 22 year old or a 32 year old son. You're like, oh, my God, how the hell did that happen? That's why I remain childless and alone, because I don't want any reminders of what's happening, of what's going what's really going on with my knee, which is I'm in decline. No, you are not. You're in ascension.

I'm ascending. You're ascending the mountains. You're ascending your physicality and your mental stamina, all of it. Hold that thought. We'll be right back.

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Qualifying plan required. Wi-Fi were available on select U.S. airlines. Deposit and Hilton honors membership required for 15% discount terms and conditions apply. Okay. One of the great things, you do this when you did all your talk shows, is you had, you know, we have our people that give us information on our guests, and I opened up the packet on you, and I'm like, I know Chelsea. I don't need to look at the packet. This is going to be great. But then...

You didn't go to dinner at Jeffrey Epstein's. This has to be bullshit. I did go to dinner at Jeffrey Epstein's house. I didn't know who Jeffrey Epstein was, but it was like, you know, 20, I don't know what year it was, but it was a long time ago. I went with Katie Couric, Woody Allen, and Sunyi Previn were there. Charlie Rose was there. And then someone else, Patty, someone, some New York...

you know, uh, Patty Siegel's her name. I don't know. She published this Peggy Siegel. Peggy Siegel. Yeah. That woman. No, she's not mine, but she, yeah. Peggy Siegel. Sure. So no, I was at that dinner party, not for very long. I didn't. And when we got there, I was like, what is this gathering? Oh yeah. Prince Andrew was there with, with, with, with, uh,

No, with no one. He was there with, I guess he was with Jeffrey Epstein. So we went there. Yeah, we had dinner and it was so awkward and so weird. And I was like, what are we doing here? And then I asked Woody Allen how he and Sunyi met. And that was when I left. Wait a minute.

You asked Woody Allen how he and Sunni met. Yeah. Like at that point of the night, I was like, this is just a ridiculous dinner party. Who are these people? I didn't understand. I'm like, what kind of, and then I looked at Woody Allen. We were sitting together eating dinner. He was sitting next to me and we were talking about, you know, who knows what. And then I really was curious. Like I had forgotten for a moment. And so I asked them what I would ask any other couple. But as it came out of my mouth, I knew that it was too late. And I was like, oh, and

And he loved it. And soon, I don't think she heard it, but Katie looked at me and she's like, let's go. I'm used to the dinner party on that note, so I was ready to rumble. That might be, I love social faux pas stories.

That's a great one. That would be awfully hard to beat. I don't even consider that a faux pas because I'm not being rude. They are by marrying your stepchild. Like that's rude. So I don't even consider it a faux pas. Good point. Yeah, thanks. Point well taken. I retract. Your Honor, I retract my previous comment for the record. Where, what, was this on the private island or was this in New York, the Jeffrey Epstein dinner? Oh no, I've never been onto the private island and I've never been on his plane. I met him one time and that was the time.

Well, listen, that was a star-studded moment though. Yeah, it was, right? It was, yes. It was very confusing. Yeah.

I, I'm just, that's so insane. But haven't you been at like those kinds of things? Not with Jeffrey Epstein. I mean, but haven't you been at these, the most random gatherings, like when you travel, if you're in London or like they, people think like celebrities all are supposed to be together. So like if they know one, they put you in all of a sudden you're having dinner with like, you know, Tina Turner and,

You know, somebody and you're just like, wait, what happened here? How did this happen? And sometimes it's awesome. And sometimes it's just silly. But it is a London. It's funny you mentioned London of all the places you could have mentioned. It's very much a London thing. I find it's like I'm over there a lot. I have friends there a lot. I've worked there a ton and I love being there. But it's always like, oh, you know who's in town. And it's like, no, I don't know that person. But but it's in it's but also it's much more social there. I think I'm in L.A. Nobody knows.

I feel like nobody does anything in LA. Well, now with COVID, nobody does anything. It's like, I mean, how hard are you willing to look like work to see somebody? You have to go sit outside in your backyard, which of course is pleasant enough, but you're only going to do that with the people you want to be around. So COVID is like, you're really thinning the herd. Don't you think? Like friendships are just kind of falling off because-

It's hard. You can't see everybody with all these rules and regulations. It's better to just stick to your own thing. I'm shooting my TV show, 911 Lone Star, and it's a big show because it has rescues and fires and explosions and all this stuff, but we're still able to shoot, which is great, but we're all in...

Double masks and face shields. The actors aren't obviously when we're acting, but you can't understand anything anybody's saying because I'm deaf in one ear anyway. So I have really hard time. Yeah, I can't hear anything. And when did you become deaf in one ear? I've since I can remember some like an infant. My the story I'm told is I probably had the mumps or some kind of a really insane virus when I was an infant.

And so it fried out my, my ear. So I can, I have really struggled with that. And so, but now they'll be like, I'm like, what? There's an explosion going off and I'm going to move. When, when am I moving? It's really, really hard to make,

To make action stuff with in COVID when you're half deaf and everybody has. You're an action star. So nothing's going to be able to ever stop you. No, this is what I, this is, I picked a role that forces me to stay in shape and physical. You know, I figured this is now it's my, literally my job to do it. Yeah. Right. Because yeah, we have to, but yeah, I copy that. Right. I mean, that's, that's one of the reasons I always say the camera is a fickle mistress. Yeah.

It doesn't lie. You know, it's like you got to, you know, you got to keep it. You got to keep it real. Right. Right. That's why, uh,

By the way, that is the single best thing about skiing is the calorie burn. I mean, that is, it's the, it's the. This is my ski program. I like to ski early in the morning because I get up really early. So I like to be out the door by like 830. I just go down. I ski for like till 1030. Then I come home. Then around 1130, I go to Bar Oso and have a margarita and some croquetas. And then I go back up on the mountain from like 12 to 230. I mean, it is the perfect day. It really is.

There's nothing better than a margarita when you're skiing. It is just because it's refreshing and it gives you energy. And then, you know, for the second half of the day, it gives me a little like it's like a little Jamba Juice boost. Now, let me ask you, but what part of the day are you checking your Raya app? Because I heard you're on Raya. Is this true? I am. I am. But I don't I haven't really done any of that when I've been up here. I'm too busy skiing. But yeah, I'm on dating apps. I mean, I'm on that app.

Yeah, my son Matthew met his girlfriend on Raya. Oh, did he? Yep. Oh, wow. I actually know a lot of people. You know what? With my experience with Raya, it yields much more consistently decent results than...

Probably a lot of other apps because there is some sort of like admission process. So I've never met like a total douchebag or somebody that I was like, I can't be around this person. Everyone's pretty cool and normal. So there's that. I wonder what it would have been like to have a dating app in the 80s. Well, I don't think you could have been on a dating app in the 80s or you probably were on a dating app and you didn't even know it. My life was a dating app. Yeah, seriously. But like what would...

It's so, it's like, you know, when you've been married as long as I have been. How long have you been married? It'll be 30 years this year. Oh my God. That is so crazy. It's, it's coming out of my mouth as I say it. I go, is that really right? But nope, that's the math. 30 years together with someone means you've been together longer than you haven't. Right? That's right. And we were together before we were married. So we've, if it's being together, we've been together 35 years, probably often, you know? And yeah.

So it's been a long, long time. A lot has changed in the culture. There was no Internet. There were no cell phones. I don't know what I what that would be like to be.

to, to, to, to navigate that today. I, that it would be so interesting. I mean, well, people, everyone's a little bit off in the dating sphere these days. I mean, between COVID and politics and all this stuff in the world, like dating is just a lot of people met during COVID, but they just like hooked up for the duration of COVID with somebody like nested, you know? Cause

Because after eight months of COVID, I'm like, I'm going to have to have sex again at some point with somebody. So I'm going to have to like meet somebody that I don't know. And we're just going to have to test and, you know, be responsible about it. Because at a certain point, you're like, am I ever going to date again? Yeah. And then the politics of it in today's world, probably, well, that's half the population is undateable for you. Right. That's right. In the United States. Yeah.

Well, not half the population, but anybody. Well, yeah, actually, that's a fair thing. It might be, right? At this point, I think so, yeah. Okay, so what are your... And only a quarter percent of the population is interested in dating me. So I've already cut it in half twice. I don't believe that for one moment. I don't believe it for one moment. What are your little like...

Everybody has those little things like it's like it's like fly fishing. You you throw it out gently to the fish and you hope the fish takes it. And then it tells you a little something about the fish. And are you going to catch the fish or not? Like, like, what do you how would how do you begin to gauge who you're dealing with as you're beginning the dating process? You're like, so do you like wearing red clothes?

trucker hats by chance? And they're like, yeah, I love red. Oh, fuck, he's out. No, no, no, no. But clothing can be a huge turnoff, Rob. And so don't think that it can't. Like if a man wears an Hermes belt or too much cologne or flip-flops, it's a wrap. You know what I mean? That's not an opening statement.

So I just like to interview them, make sure they're like, well, the great thing is I got, I had bought these COVID tests at my house. So I had like 20 of them. They're like these rapid response, you know, they were 99% accurate that I got from my doctor. So I would have guys come over, we hang out in my backyard. And then if I was like, okay, this is a guy that I could like, you know, have like be on a date with, then I'd be like, hey, do you want to take this COVID test? And then if I wasn't into them, it takes like 20 minutes. I would just come back and be like, you're positive. Yeah.

I love that. That's how you cut them now. That's the new age. You got COVID. Guess what? You have COVID. You have to go now. You have to leave. And then there's no conversation. Then they just have to go. And then if you like the guy, you're like, oh, they're negative. They're negative. It's like, wow. It's almost like the anticipation becomes almost relatable to high school years, you know, because of like that little, you know, when you're not actively dating, when you do find someone you like, you're like, oh, let's get the party started. You're like, this is great news.

So what I love that an Hermes belt, because I have an Hermes belt. I have an Hermes belt. I do. But that could be a little bit ironic, you wearing that. Yes, it is absolutely. Yes, it's ironic. I'm not a label wearer.

No, I hate labels. Oh my God. Anything with a label on it. It's so annoying to me. It's embarrassing. I remember like, you know, there's a, I remember growing up cause I, we didn't have a lot of money, but obviously I wasn't starving. I grew up in like a suburbia in New Jersey and,

But I remember being so obsessed with like labels, you know, growing up because I didn't my parents didn't have that money to buy me guest jeans or traffic jeans or whatever was in style. Chemin de Fer. That's all the girls were wearing in Malibu. Chemin de Fer. That sounds like a vaginal spray.

Um, but I, so I would be, I remember being very materialistic. Like when I started getting money, like I wanted nice things and I was like, but I don't want, I never wanted anything with a label on it, you know? And there's a whole culture of like, oh my God, we have to have a Fendi bag or a Gucci bag or a Birkin bag. It's like, I can't think of anything more stupid than spending money on a purse. I will tell you that.

There are people who love labels. A lot of people love labels or there wouldn't be labels. But when I'm going through my closet and getting rid of stuff, my wife will come in and go, are you getting rid of this? And I go, yeah, I don't like it. She goes, who makes it? I go, wait a minute. I don't want it. I'm getting rid of it. Does it matter? Is it less...

bad because who makes it who care you know right so we always have this we always have this label fight about the things that I'm getting rid of and obviously if it's a label it's a tougher negotiation to get rid of it because she doesn't ever want me to get rid of anything I'm like one of those guys if I haven't worn it in a year it's out it's going to you know it's going to go to goodwill or you know I'm going to give it to somebody or whatever but I have a rule if I haven't worn it in a year done

Well, that's a healthy you're not a hoarder then. No, I don't get it. I don't get the hoarding thing. Do you? No, I'm not a hoarder at all. I hate things that, I mean, I don't hate, I don't want anything around that I'm not using or that like has been sitting there. I like to clean out my closet and just give stuff away and not hold on to stuff. I also though, I have a kind of, I aspire to,

To be a minimalist and it's never going to happen. And I go to certain people's houses and or see certain people's desks. That's a big thing. When you go to somebody's office and you see their desk and it's got a single pen and that's it. I go either they're either uber evolved, like super smart, way smarter than I could ever hope to be, or they're doing nothing.

And I don't know which it is. Yes, that's right. That's good. I mean, I don't really have a desk. Do you? Well, you're sitting at a desk. Today I'm in a studio because we're moving and I usually do this at my house and I'm

Can I tell you, moving is not the faint of heart. It is. It's like the number one reason couples split up. So be careful. Oh, and I know because also my wife has a really gnarly OCD around packing. So she. That is so exhausting. Oh, so I'm not kidding you.

If we're going to go away for the, for a weekend, a weekend. So, which might even only be one night, technically, right? You arrive on a Saturday, Saturday night and could be one night. The amount of packing, unpacking, repacking that my wife will do. And now imagine. And if you're going for one night.

Oh, you have no idea. What, like games? I mean- No! You know, it's outfits, clothes. Oh, multiple outfits. I'm going to go, honey, you're not Cher. There don't need to be costume changes. And so now you can imagine with the house move, it's like pushing. Everybody has their buttons, but her button's getting pushed. But she's being great. I have to say, she's been so much better than

Than I thought she would be with this move. And of course, I will do anything to avoid work. So I'm really good at I learned as a kid to I'm really good at looking busy while I'm actually doing nothing. I learned that.

I learned to avoid doing yard work that way with my, my domineering mother. And so I just carry that on now with this move. You'd think. Yeah. I do that with my family a lot. I'll be like, Oh, can I, can I help you with the dishes? And they just look at me like, no, obviously you can't. You're useless. You know, but I try to pretend like, Hey, I, I want to, I want to pitch in, but I know basically my only contribution is my personality. Same. Do you think that's enough?

What's gotten us this fall? Look, I do have guilt about not being as handy as I would like to be. But I also know that at the end of the day, I'm more valuable not falling off the ladder, getting the leaves out of the drain pipe. It's like you don't want that to happen to me because I do other things that require me being ambulatory.

I see. I see. Yes. Does that make sense? Well, if you associate raking leaves with you falling and breaking your ankle, then yes, it makes perfect sense. There was a ladder. I wasn't raking leaves in the story. There were a ladder and then there was a rain gutter. So I don't know where you ended up. Maybe you fell off the ladder into the rain gutter. Is that what happened? Yes. Yes. I once was...

sweeping the rain off of a flat roof. The chimney, you were in the chimney to begin with. I was never, I've never been in the chimney. I'm not Santa. And, and I've, I've been injured doing very mundane things. That's the thing that like, it's like the same as back to skiing is I can ski the, the, the cool wars and all of that. But the only time I've ever broken a bone was on the bunny hill. I mean, it's like the E it's the easy stuff.

Where you take your eye off the ball that gets you. So that's why I don't want to do easy work. I don't want to do work. I want to sit and talk to you. And this is what I want to do. Are you enjoying doing your podcast and interviewing people? I am. I'm loving it. I'm absolutely loving it. Because I think it's everything I love about talk shows and none of the stuff I don't love. Right? So there's like, I hate pre-interviews. I hate giving them. I hate interviews.

Having them, I talk to only the people I want to talk to. I talk about whatever I want to talk to. I don't I don't have to, like, make sure you mention that they're starring is, you know, you know.

banjo player in the new DC movie or whatever the hell it's like I just not into that so um captain banjo player by the way do you like that reference I think yeah I like that a lot that was really that was really hot wasn't it I'm gonna write that one down yeah use that one again um but um I like it it's

It's such a nice medium because, you know, when you go on a talk show, it's so artificial and you're like there for seven or eight minutes and you're supposed to get your jokes and your stories. And so it's like, it's back to the Howard Stern format that works the long, you know, the best is when you can sit with somebody and actually have a normal engaged conversation.

conversation, not an interview, you know, like that's when you get the good stuff. I think in my experience with interviews as well, the more time you have with somebody, the more natural it is, you know? So it's a kind of great, I think that's probably why people love podcasts so much right now.

So it's good use of people's times for sure. Oh, by the way, I know what I wanted to talk to you more about. So we talked a little bit about this when I did your show, I think. We talked about ayahuasca when you did Chelsea Does. And we share – this is the best. I'm so happy to say this phrase. We share the same shaman, you and I. Shaman Rasmussen, who took you and did the ayahuasca with you, is my shaman.

Is that right? Yes, 100%. And I don't know my shaman's name. It's it's it's John. And so my backstory with the shaman is Cheryl and I went on a vacation at what's the what's the the the the area? Not the Ventana Ranch. The one it's a big search. The other one.

Post post post post ranch post ranch. Thank you. The post ranch. So post ranch is, is, you know, this famous hippie, dippy, high end, gorgeous, you know, esoteric retreat. And they have a spa menu in the room and it's like, you can get a massage, you can go on a hike, you can go see the butterflies, you can get a session with the shaman. And I was like, Oh, I know which one I'm going to be doing. I'm doing the session with the shaman. Yeah.

And I'm like, this is either going to be the greatest thing ever or the most ridiculous, ironic thing. It was the greatest thing ever. When the shaman walked in the room, honest to God, I was like, oh, okay, there's no fooling around. This guy's like, this is legit. Such...

energy. And it was, and he and I become friends ever, ever since. And in the course of talking, when we started talking about ayahuasca and things like that, and he's like, oh, I, I did a show where I took a Chelsea Handler to do ayahuasca. I was like, wait, what? That's you? I want to do that. Well, I'm sober though. So I can't really do it though. That's the problem. That's right. You're sober, but a lot of people do ayahuasca to get sober. So maybe-

Yeah. You could re-sober up. It's not like a drug drug. It's not something you're going to want to do again. For sure. Is it really painful? Is it like, is it really the vomiting and the, all of the before you get to the good stuff? Well, it was, yeah, you vomit. And they told me that I would, you could possibly shit your pants. And I was like, I won't do that. Like I'm not a beginner. You know what I mean? Like I know I'm not going to shit my pants.

And my shaman actually did shit his pants twice. So I don't think, I think the guy you're talking about was like my escort to Peru. And then the shaman that I did the ceremony with was someone, was someone else. Makes sense. Peruvian, like he literally lived inside of a tree. So I don't think that's Rasmussen. No. But I'd like to hear more about your experience. Like what, what was it? What was it like? Well, I mean, we did, he did a lot of stuff with like,

Like rocks and a rattle, a thing called left eye tracking, where you look in their left eye and they do a rattle and it's the sound of the rattle and the rhythm of the rattle and the frequency of it. And it's all, you know, it's all stuff that's been handed down generation for hundreds of thousands of years and.

sort of the native American and indigenous people stuff. And I found it to be really fascinating. I have to say. Yeah, it does. It sounds. Yeah. Okay. Well, good. I mean, it's whatever you get out of it. Right. Well, yeah. And like just on an anthropological thing, which I love, I love learning about that stuff and whether it's like, whether it works or not to me kind of is irrelevant. It's like,

That's the least interesting part of it to me. It's like I love the process of it. And why are people still staring into people's eyes and shaking rattles in in 2020?

Right. Why? There's got to be a reason. Well, people are looking for answers and sometimes there's an answer and a rattle, right? I mean, and by the way, it doesn't matter if it's true or not. It just matters what you choose to think works. Like we can convince ourselves of anything. So, you know, it's like meditation works if you believe it works. If you're sitting there saying it doesn't work, it doesn't work, then it doesn't. Yeah.

You know, it's like you have to participate in, in, in like those types of things. Do you, do you, have you ever done like TM or any meditation, proper meditation? I meditate every morning, but I don't do TM. No, I haven't been trained in TM. I think you do it, right? I think you and I talked about that. I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I had a, I had it all set up and then COVID happened and you have to do,

a training for TM in person. So I'm with- With that Peggy Hintz woman, right? Or Peggy Mintz. There's some woman who trains everybody for TM. It's the David Lynch Foundation. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. But so what does your meditation look like? Well, I mean, what is- I get up every morning and I just, just to not be a bitch, you know, like I just have to regulate myself

If I wake up in a foul mood or I feel like a cunt, I'm like, no, you can't be a cunt today. Like you have to be nice to everybody you see. You have to engage and be focused when you're talking to people, even when you're not interested in talking to them. I need you to be nice to everybody. And that's basically my meditation is my, that's my intention every day is to be kind, generous, and not be irritated when people are like, you know,

I find them to be a little stupid. I can't be irritated. I just have to be loving. So that's my meditation pretty much in life. You know, these days. You and I have the same meditation, it sounds like. I have to wake up two hours early not to be a cunt either. We'll be right back after this.

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I spent so much time in my car. It's worth it. It's worth it to live where I live and to live the quality of life that I live and to give my kids the kind of upbringing that

They were able to have outside of Los Angeles. But if you do one of those things about if you add it up all the time that a human being sleeps, you would it's like when they do that, get into that stuff. You added up how much time I'm in a car.

It's years. It'll be years of my life, but whatever. Yeah. Well, Los Angeles isn't great for traffic in general. I just sold, I'm homeless. I've got to find a house in LA because I just sold my house. And then I came to Whistler. And so my assistant goes house hunting and just FaceTimes me. So I'm going to have to buy a house over FaceTime. That should be a disaster.

You can't do that. Don't, don't, you must not do that. You have to. I know it's still, it's silly. I bought this house over FaceTime because it was, it came available and I couldn't come up to Whistler because of the, of COVID. And so I just kind of pulled the trigger because I was like sight unseen. And,

And I mean, I'm happy. So that's good. But you're right. You shouldn't be buying things over Facebook. I mean, I'm no financial expert, but I don't think you should. That's so me. Like, I'm so impulsive. I don't think things through. Yeah, just buy that house. If you don't like it, we'll sell it. It's like, talk about white privilege. No, I mean, that's your new show title, right? Of the last special.

That was my last documentary, "Hello Privilege, It's Me, Chelsea." The most recent thing was "Evolution" on HBO Max. That's my standup special. And then "Hello Privilege, It's Me, Chelsea" was for Netflix, which was like, you know, confronting, kind of trying to understand myself exactly what white privilege is so that I wasn't having opinions about something I knew very little about, being that I am white and probably immune to a lot of it because it's been my life, you know?

And so, yeah, it was more of that was like a kind of inter inter. It was just like an interrogative about like, what is white privilege? What does it mean to be white in this world? And what are we not thinking about? You know that, you know, that because of not being exposed to enough, which is what was the number one? What was your biggest sort of, oh, well, I'm assuming you had a ton of aha moments. What was the one that stood out to you, if any?

I mean, the overall theme was just my own entitlement, like my own entitlement. Just, you know, I've never been pulled over and not like argued with a cop. I mean, I've always been like, you can't give me a ticket. Like I've had such attitude, you know, the entitlement that I think I that I can act like that where, you know, a black person gets pulled over and they're scared for their lives.

So it's just, it's like the daily things, going to a grocery store and eating, you know, a gummy bear out of the gummy bear bin, which I've been wanting to do. Obviously now with COVID, I won't be able to doing that anymore. But you know, like the things that you take for granted, just because you're raised without people looking for you to screw up. And I also had a boyfriend, a black boyfriend when I was in high school and we got caught with marijuana twice and he got arrested both times and both times they let me go.

And, you know, at the time I was like, oh, I'm funny and I'm cute and pretty. And it's like, no, they were looking to get him in trouble and they were looking to make sure that I wasn't going to get into trouble. So I learned a lot about it. And I learned, you know, that you have to be a participant and an ally to, you know, all of these groups because we've benefited. Any white person has benefited when somebody, you know, is being subjugated. There's a group that's

Get benefiting from that subjugation. And so we all have to take responsibility now, you know, now it's, it's on the table every day. So you can't look away from it. How was the reaction to people? I heard it was, I haven't seen it yet, but I hear, I've heard people talking about it. People loved it.

Oh, thanks. No, I think it was a good reaction. I mean, I'm sure people were like, what is Chelsea doing talking? I wasn't talking about racism. I was talking about whiteness. You know what I mean? Which I have a lot of experience with. And I've got some experience being white, I think. Yeah. And with white women, you know, I mean, that'll be my next one. I want to do a new Chelsea does series where I do Chelsea does Karen's where I can. Oh, my God. Amazing. Yeah. Amazing. And

I'd be like, listen, I speak Karen. I grew up, I speak white woman. I understand that you guys have gotten different information, but I can show you the light because I showed myself the light. The Karen thing is my favorite. It's like, it's such a genius, brilliant name. Like, it's like, it's just discovering a species that we knew has been there forever. And somebody said, oh, you know, this is a species, right? This is an actual bird. Like, I know.

The Karen. I think I was, I think all my substitute teachers were Karens.

Yeah, there's a lot of Karens out there, but you know, it's good that they're being called out. I like that because we should, and we should also, you know, we should call people out and then be able to forgive them once they realize that they've, you know, that their behavior is unacceptable and are interested in changing their philosophy or ways into like more kindness. Then yes, then we should always forgive people too. I'm not into this whole canceling everybody who says something wrong. It's like we, everybody evolves. There's an evolution to everybody.

Do you find it's harder? I mean, I can't even imagine that. I mean, you're about as fearless a person as I know, but is it do you ever self censor?

In this culture where everybody's so sensitive to everything when you're trying to be funny? You have to, you know what I mean? Like party, like you have to, to be sensitive to other people. Like if you come to an understanding that words are harmful to subjugated groups and marginalized communities, and they're not just there for the benefit of your entertainment, like, and humor and,

Like you have to make the adjustment and yeah, it's good. It makes people think harder about comedy, you know, to be more clever, to be, you know, to start with yourself instead of others. You know, I think we're in a really sensitive time and we should be sensitive to that. I was watching a best of all in the family recently, and you cannot believe the themes that they were able to do

And listen, Archie Bunker was a misogynist, chauvinistic, racist. That was the point of the character, right? Yeah. Still, though, the things that he says on network television, like you couldn't, there's no way you could do it. There's no way. No, and nor should we. Like that was a time and a place. He did that. That's enough of that.

You know, we don't want to do that anymore. But you're right. Even things you've seen five years ago, you know, you're like, whoa, that wouldn't be okay now, you know? Yeah. And you don't see it so much in drama, I don't think. But when you watch...

Well, comedy has always been, comedy is a shelf life business. I've always like, what's funny 50 years ago is not funny now. What's funny, notwithstanding the cultural stuff we're going through. It just is like, I've never, I've never. Like sarcasm isn't funny anymore. You know, like earnestness is funny. Like, like what are those two girls, Abby Jacobson and Alana Glazier, you know, their show, what's it called?

Oh, yeah. I can't think of it right now. But like Broad City. Like that humor was was very is very representative of like that generation where it's it's more kind and quirky and and, you know, oddball and goofy. And it's not there's no sarcasm because sarcasm is mean, basically, even though that's like my right hand. I'm like every my my nieces and nephews were like six and seven or sarcastic.

They're like, oh, this cereal is great. You know, like that's how we communicate as a family. But when you really like break down sarcasm, you're like, it's just negativity. But I still like to participate in it because it's funny. It makes me laugh. But yeah, comedy does change all the time. Like I've definitely noticed that. I have never laughed and he was great. He did great things for the country, obviously. But I have never cracked a smile at, say, Bob Hope. Clearly, America thought Bob Hope was hilarious. Yeah.

And do you ever sometimes watch people to go? There's certain shows that I will not name that are huge, huge, huge, huge comedy hits on television. And I will watch multiple episodes and not even smile. I'm going to watch this one of the all time biggest hits in the history of television in my lifetime. I'm going to watch it. It's a calm and I just sit there and it's crickets. Do you ever have that?

Yeah, I've tried to watch shows that people have recommended where I'm like, wait, I don't get it for sure. But I don't continue to watch that. But I also notice, you know, like comedies,

On TV, like, I like dramas, unless they're, like, you know, like a dramedy. I'm not interested in watching that stuff. I never have been. It's so much... Because probably because that's my life is, like, you know, stand-up and comedy and trying to always, like, bring humor to a situation. So when I watch stuff, I go serious. Like, I'm watching Marcella on Netflix right now, which is just the perfect kind of show for me. Like, detective, murderer,

some fucked up woman whose husband left her and her kids are a hot messes. Like I love that kind of interpersonal drama. Did you see Chernobyl?

Yeah, I saw that. That was great. That's my favorite thing of the last couple of years. Yeah, that was really good. That guy, whoever that actor is, is awesome. You know, the guy from The Queen also. Oh, oh. Who is the star of Chernobyl? Yeah, well, both of them. And I can't think, God, I can't think of their names. He said, we'll just call him Rob Lowe. Yeah, Rob Lowe was great in Chernobyl. I was great in Chernobyl. Oh.

The, yeah, where the reactor melted down my cheekbones. That, that, that, that episode of Chernobyl is quite spectacular. Well, I'm trying to think what else I like, what else I've been watching. That's, that's particularly good. Michael Jordan's. First of all, that Michael Jordan documentary, I watched about four times. That was the best documentary I've seen. And I'm not a sports fan. I'm that, that was a great human interest story. You know, how incredible Michael Jordan was. Oh,

My favorite is him in the iconic Bulls uniform smoking a gigantic Churchill length cigar. And those images are just the best.

I like that he was wearing shorts while he was being interviewed with drinking like a Jameson. Like he didn't even get dressed for the interview and that he's like, I'm going to put shorts on and I'm going to make a cocktail and then I'll interview you. And then I'll sit down with you. I'm like, yeah, that's hot. He's a baller. I, I, um, once, uh, watched a, um, it was, it was at a casino and this was the group playing blackjack was Jordan. Um,

Barclay, Pete Sampras, and Mario Lemieux. By the way, all four of those guys are in the Hall of Fame in their sports. And they must have been betting 50 grand a hand

And not even looking at the cards, like talking to me, talking to themselves, drinking, smoking cigars. I think they were playing two tables at once. And this is just another day in the life for Michael. Oh, so fun. So much fun. I love that. I love guys who gamble. You know, my favorite Jordan, and it wasn't in the documentary. My favorite piece of Jordan trivia is...

If you go back and look at the Lakers and Showtime, they all have like these butt tight shorts on. Right. Like you go, whoa. Right. Like, like, but tight, like, like, I don't know what's going on here. And then all of a sudden the shorts were baggy. And that was because Michael brought in the the baggy shorts that we still see in the NBA. The reason they went from butt tight to baggy was because Michael would not play without his North Carolina shorts on.

So they had to make the NBA uniform longer to cover his North Carolina shorts. They insisted on wearing before every game. Wow. Isn't that a cool little weird... Why wouldn't they have put that in the documentary? That's such a cool little nugget of information. I know, because overnight, the look of the NBA changed. I remember they talk about that. They don't say that it's just because of him, though. Yeah. Yeah, they say it's like the Fab Five of Michigan and all that stuff. But everybody took their cues from Michael. He was...

He's still the man. Have you ever gotten into golf? You strike me as somebody who would like golf. Why? Because I look like a lesbian? Well, I didn't want to come right out and say it. Yeah, no, I'm not into golf. I find it so, I mean, I haven't really given it a go, but I don't foresee that happening. I'm just saying. I'm just saying. Are you into golf? I'm obsessed with it. It's the most addictive sport I've ever encountered other than surfing. Are you a big surfer? Yeah, I love it.

Oh, that's nice. I love it. But skiing is my best thing. That's the thing that I'm actually like. I wish we should bring back the John Denver ski. Do you remember the John Denver celebrity ski tournaments they used to have? Was that before your time in the business? No, but I would totally do a celebrity ski tour. Why are we why are you and I not doing a celebrity ski tournament?

Lindsay would do it too. Lindsay Vodder. I mean, she'd kick our ass, but she would kill us. What? I'm serious. We need to figure this out. I'm not kidding. We should do it in Whistler. Yes. I mean, how great seeing, you know, Justin Timberlake break his Achilles on the hill. It would be amazing. I don't know why I chose him to get hurt on my imaginary. Yeah. It sounds like you're pretty jealous of him, Rob. I am. He's too talented. He's another guy's too talented.

I just can't have it. Can't have that kind of thing going on. You can't have that kind of competition. How dare he be a good actor and singer and dancer and gorgeous and married. And I can't, I can't keeps me up at night. I would love to do because John Denver had it. It was in Aspen. It was a big deal. I wasn't, I was never famous enough to get into it. And it's a great, it's my great career regret.

that it never happened, but that would be awesome. Wouldn't it? Yeah, that would be fun. We should talk about that. I'll get my, I'll start thinking about that on the chairlift later this afternoon. Start putting, and we started thinking about who skis. I don't know. Cause that's the thing that always made me laugh is you go to Sundance for a movie and I'd always want to ski and no one it's deserted. Yeah.

Desserted during the Sundance Film Festival. Yeah, Kevin Hart thinks he can ski, but he can't really. I can promise you he can't. He can't. And he will definitely want to be in the tournament. So that's a bonus. Who else? Lindsey Vonn. Yeah, there's some other people out there. Josh Jackson. He's a big skier. Joshua Jackson. Mm-hmm.

I don't know. We need to think of it. The Kevin Hart thing, we're done. We've got our sponsorship there. He's the biggest star in the world. We're done. Yeah, we can have MasterCard sponsor it. Yeah, it's over. Yeah, whichever credit card he's endorsing this month. Yeah, I mean, he's a machine.

I know. I know he really is. He's a workaholic is what he is. Are you a workaholic? I'm not. I am. I can tell you're not a workaholic. You're skiing every day. Yeah, no, I'm not a workaholic. I like to take long breaks. I love working really, really hard for extended periods of time. And then when I have that, a month is plenty.

Time off. I so enjoy it because I feel like I've earned it. Like I like my self-worth is so low that I have to I have to grind my fingers to a pulp in my cushy, stupid show business jobs so I can enjoy my time off.

That sounds very, very reasonable, Rob. Does it sound like I've had some therapy or that I've had no therapy? No, it just sounds like you. Yeah, it doesn't sound like you've had a lot. You should probably double back on the therapy. I know. I don't want to be in a couch my whole life.

No, you don't have to. You go like, it's like surgical. Like you go to therapy for like three months, six months for incremental times in your life where you need guidance and help and self-awareness. And then you don't hang out with that person for the next five years. That's the opposite. I like therapy in short bursts. Like, hey, I have a problem. Please straighten me out. What's my problem? Usually it comes back to the same thing. I'm a bitch.

and I have no patience. So I always have to kind of like double back with that theme. And then, you know, now I have tools to combat my bitch. Okay. So let's talk about no patience. Cause if you asked my family, my biggest flaw or like what they would like to change about me, I can promise you it would be that I don't have enough patience. Yeah. What does that, what does that say about me and you?

That we're selfish because patience is about being selfish. Like you don't have time for other people to take time doing what they're doing because you want everything fast. It's what you want, right? So we're selfish. So I don't want to be selfish. You probably don't want to be selfish either. No, no. Right. So then we just have to figure out the tools to not be selfish, the opposite of it. So the opposite of patience is like,

Okay. So when somebody does something and I'm like, I catch myself now and I'm like, no, no, no, just be loving and sweet. Like, it's not all about you. It's about everybody. So that always helps me. Yeah. It's. You still can't understand. He's like, whatever, stay.

Wait, wait. I'm like, wait a minute. What is this thing not about me? What can you explain that a little bit further to me? It feels good to not be like, it feels really good when you're able to like not be like that, you know, like even like for a second when you're like, you can turn it around. Like, wait, that's not, that's not giving or loving or caring. Like I don't need to be, it doesn't have to be about me when you can actually do that and mean it. You're like, oh, that was good. I like that. I like the way that feels.

Yeah. And it's funny. Selfishness is not the exclusive purview of privileged, entitled people either. I mean, like I've met selfish people in every walk of life I've ever encountered. I'm one of them. So I know when I see him. I know my brothers and sisters when I see them. Yeah. So this is selfish. The secret society, selfish person's handshake. You know, it's not that big of a secret. No.

No, it's not. So tell me about the plan for the rest of the day. I need to live vicariously as I send you off to your wonderful day you have ahead of you. Well, I'm going to just hit the slopes again. I have my gear on. I'm going to put my coat back on and I'm just going to go out there and meet my friends. And then we're going to go to a little apres. So it's all- Apre! It'll be pretty fun. Well, will you please give everybody my love and-

I need to get back up there. I had, I, I was up there directing a movie and I love directing the movie, but I loved my weekend escape skiing almost even better. It was so fun. I bet you guys were having fun up here. We were killing it. Well, to give everybody my best and let's think about, first of all, we should think about the name of our new celebrity ski tournament. It should have a really cool name. The Rob Lowe Celebrity Ski Tournament, quite frankly. Yeah.

You're just willingly giving up billing on this? Yeah, no, no. I think, well, we'll discuss it further. Let me get my thinking cap on. That's a totally different color cap. And it's a different style, different color, different color cap. Okay, put the thinking cap on. Wear a helmet when you ski, please. Always do. Always do. All right. Thank you, darling. It was just so fun. Thank you, Rob. Have a great day. Bye, guys. Bye, you guys. Force of nature. She is, I wish I could bottle her.

some of that essence. I don't know how I'd describe it. She's kind of like in your face, clearly very funny, really smart, charismatic, attractive. She's, she's great. And, um, obviously some of her skiing ability, uh, that was great. And thank you to the wonderful Chelsea Handler. And I am off to do some ayahuasca and, uh, poop my pants. Thank you very much. You have been listening to literally with Rob Lowe produced and engineered by me, Devin Tory Bryant.

Executive produced by Rob Lowe for Lowe Profile. Adam Sachs and Jeff Ross at Team Coco. And Colin Anderson and Chris Bannon at Stitcher. The supervising producer is Aaron Blairt. Talent producer, Jennifer Sampas. Please rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts. And remember to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or wherever you get your podcasts. This has been a Team Coco production in association with Stitcher.

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