Tig Notaro: Do They Even Know?
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Hello, welcome. Here we are. We are literally together. You're literally listening to Literally with me right now, Rob Lowe. Tig Notaro, very funny, so dry, hilarious person, is gracing our show today. And it is a, to say the word meandering doesn't quite do justice to this talk. But I'm going to say it's meandering in the best possible way. Tig Notaro.

Tig, how are you? I'm doing well. Welcome, welcome to the circus here. Thanks for having me. I'd say I love a circus, but I am an outspoken vegan, so. That's right. You and my good friend, Ellen. Yeah. And you guys go way, way back. I feel like Ellen, she dropped out of the vegan world, though.

She did. She slid out. Yeah. She slid right out. She slid, she slid out. She, uh, there were, there were many a dinner where, where there was a vacillation fully in process. Yes. Um, you directed her great special. The last one. Is that the last one she's done? I think that, yeah. Right. Yeah. It's called relatable. And, uh, she's currently working on a new material and, uh,

You know, I'm just out promoting her new stand-up. I hear it's great, by the way. It is. It's really good. Oh, that's awesome. I have some shows with her coming up at Largo in Los Angeles. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, where's my invite? I don't know if it's promoted yet. I mean, how much pickleball do I need to play with Ellen to get an invitation? Yeah.

to the show. But now you're my friend, so to hell with her. Yes. I'll just come to see you. I'll come see you play pickleball. How often do you play? Well, they would be equally as funny. I can promise you that. Well, I have a whole thing about whether pickleball is really even a sport. And...

See, I don't know. I'm an old grump, see. And like I remember when... I'm old enough to remember when snowboarding first started. When was that? Because I feel like you and I probably aren't too different in age. Yeah, I'm 60 this week, so... Are you? Yeah. You look good, sir. And we are different in age. I'm only 52. Yeah, I got a couple years on you. Yeah. And...

Yeah, snowboarding, I'm going to say, I guess I probably first noticed it like early 80s, like 81, 82. Okay. And I was like, this is lame. This isn't skiing. Who are these punks? This isn't real. Real people ski. And I like the attitude. And I feel the same. I got to be honest. I kind of feel the same way about Beckham. It's like, play tennis. Play tennis. Well, do you play tennis? I do. Okay. All right.

I do. I put my money where my mouth is sometimes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I like pickleball and tennis, but I've played more tennis than I've played pickleball. But I did...

Play in the celebrity tournament on Paramount Plus. And me and Will Ferrell were partners. And just tune in and see what happened. Stephen Colbert produced it and hosted it. Amazing. Yeah. Who was your most fearsome challengers? For me, everyone. Yeah.

Every single person was fierce. And yeah, but I would say truly everybody. I haven't played enough to really hold my own, but it's still worth seeing the Paramount special. Oh, I will definitely be doing that. Look, everybody plays it.

I actually do have fun when I play it, I have to admit. I just got to get over... You know, everybody celebrates early adapters and things. I'm a late adapter. Something has to be around forever and ever and ever. And then I go, yeah, I guess it's earned its stripes. I'm kind of the same way. Right? Yeah. I got really...

Well, I sometimes won't even participate. If somebody talks too much about something, I'm like, oh, God, I can't go to Pinkberry. Like, you're not, I've never walked into a Pinkberry. And I don't want to get anybody sued here, but no Pinkberry for me. Do you remember when everyone was talking about Pinkberry? Well, full disclosure, I was one of the original investors in Pinkberry. Is this true? This is absolutely true. You're hitting me where it hurts. Now, listen.

here's the thing though. Here's my Pinkberry thing. I liked Pinkberry when it was Pinkberry. And then they started getting their asses kicked by these mom and pops that would literally let you put

powdered sugar, Captain Crunch, like anything you wanted on top of like they were high, like what high people would come in and want. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then Pinkberry sort of followed. Now it's not really, like I like it when it was old school, again, simple, old school, you know? Well, what is Pinkberry now?

It's like every other, like, fro-yo, any kind of goop and glop you want to throw on it. They got it. Why did you invest in Pinkberry? You were like, oh my God, this is the greatest thing in the world. I liked, I really, I liked the, I love the original Pinkberry.

But like, well, like super simple, like with like, they did have Fruity Pebbles originally, right? So it was- I don't know. I've never been there. Fruity Pebbles. I refuse. I refuse. You refuse. That's the hill you die on? Pink, of all the hills. That's the hill? What is the donut shop everyone talked about? I was like, oh God, get a life. You ready? Here's what I'd never set foot in. And the owner's a friend.

I know him. He's a nice man. The Cheesecake Factory. See, I step foot in there because they have vegan options. And when I'm touring, I'm like... You know what you got. Well, when I'm in certain areas, you'll see me at Chipotle, a Cheesecake Factory, you know, one of these places. I don't want to eat in a factory. For me, it's like nothing says...

Mass-produced and made without individuality other than the word factory. Yeah, it's made without love. Just on a conveyor belt. And probably loud. Like, I don't want to go in there and have them seat me next to all the machinery.

Yeah, it does ruin a dinner when you're sitting there and cheesecakes are coming down the... Like I Love Lucy. And the other one, do you remember the Ye Olde Spaghetti Factory? Yes, I do remember it. It's been a while. Ye Olde. It's even worse. Not only is it a factory, they come out and say it's an old factory. Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

You're not going to fucking Rob Lowe in there. No, update the factory. New spaghetti factory, you might have a shot. Brand spanking new spaghetti factory. Yeah. Don't get it. I also have things that... Wait, how is this podcast going? Is this what I'm on here for? This is what we do. Okay. This is it. It's like, I'm a sober guy who talks like I'm high.

Do you understand? Does that make sense? Yes. How long have you been sober? 33 years. Wow. That's awesome. At least this is what I think I sounded like when I was high. Spaghetti factory, you know, talking about food. Yeah. That's not a far leap, is it? No. I mean, I'm not...

I'm not the biggest partier that you can find. My first girlfriend used to call me, or she used to say that I was a party anvil. She said, taking you out in public is like carrying an anvil on my back. I'm just a real square, you know? How did you become so square if your roots are so steeped in the music business? Well...

I mean, you can enjoy music without doing drugs and alcohol. Wait a minute. Well, hang on now. You were in the 90s. Yeah. Like working with bands. Ripped jeans. Ripped jeans and not... I bet you had a trucker hat on back where I can only imagine. No, no. No? No. Maybe once. Maybe once. And that was truly to just get the bill of the hat out of my way. Was not for any...

stylish reasons, but I don't know. I smoked cigarettes for a long time. But then I...

Quit that when I was 25. What bands were you working with back in the day? Nobody you would have heard of. I was living in Colorado, and it was all local bands that I was booking, and nobody broke out of there, except for me. Then I quit working with bands, went to Los Angeles, got into stand-up, and...

Then I ended up breaking through. What was the, have you had a moment in your career where you went, yeah, okay, I've made it. Yeah. The first time I did stand up at an open mic.

Really? Yeah. I had no... I didn't move to LA to work and to pursue anything that I'm doing. I have very close childhood friends that were moving to LA to work in TV and film. And I just went with them because we went everywhere together. And then when I got to town...

I saw that you could do stand-up everywhere, and it was my top secret dream. So I tried it, and I was like, yeah, I did it. How much did you prepare before that first open mic?

Did you write, you had stuff written, obviously, right? You wrote stuff, right? Yeah, I wrote some stuff and I talked to myself in the mirror for a couple of weeks in my studio apartment. I used, I looked at myself in the mirror and I held a flashlight, not turned on, but just...

an off flashlight talking to myself. How thrown were you when you got to the open mic and it was on a stand? God damn it. I prepared with this in my hand. You know what? That didn't throw me. What did was when people laughed because I didn't account for the laughter. I was so used to talking to myself and hearing nothing that when people laughed, it startled the hell out of me.

That's amazing. Well, it's great that, A, they laughed and there weren't crickets. I mean, have you ever... Of course, look, anybody really funny has to have bombed it at one point, even if it's just a joke, right? Just eating it, right? I've eaten it so many times, I don't even know what to do. I was run out of Ireland. The seventh time that I ever did stand-up, I was so cocky from...

doing well, quote unquote, at the first set that I signed up for a comedy competition in Orange County to try and win $100. My friend Derek drove me down there and I bombed so deeply and ran out of

Ran off the stage and he and I drove back to the Hollywood area while he choked to death laughing at how bad I bombed. What do you attribute it to? Was it the same material that you just crushed with?

Yeah, but that's stand-up, especially in the early days or in the early development of material. Yeah, it's just, that's part of it. And it's probably similar to addiction where you're like, oh, okay.

I can get that back. I can get that feeling back. I saw it. It went well once. That felt good. Yeah, you chased the high forever. Yeah. So that's definitely something I can relate to. I heard a theory, and I don't remember who I heard it from, but it was someone that I thought at the time had enough credibility that I've remembered it, was that

The thing about audiences, particularly for comedy, is like, you know, we know this to be true. Certain people are laughers. And other people literally just go, that's hilarious. And they literally think it's as hilarious as the person next to them who's laughing. And you need a certain amount of laughers in a room. And you can just...

you know, by the law of numbers, end up on any given day with not enough laughers. Yeah, I would say because I've been in comedy for as long as I have, like in stand-up. I've been almost 28 years now. And I would say I'm definitely a, oh my God, that's hysterical. Or, oh, that's hilarious. And then when somebody...

really makes me laugh. It's the best feeling. Why is that? I'm with you. I very rarely, and I love comedy. I appreciate comedy. I get it. I feel like I'm kind of a student of it. I've done some of it, but I so rarely laugh out loud. So rarely. It doesn't mean that I'm not enjoying it. Yeah, same. And I have to trust the audience feels that way too when they tell me that they were like,

you know, silent listening to me. But yeah, I don't know. I think, you know, maybe have you always been that way? Because I haven't always been that way. I would say that it's more when you're

exposed to it a lot. For me, it's more of like, oh, that's interesting. Oh, hmm, that combination of words or, oh, that particular word or, oh, yeah. I'm analyzing it and dissecting, but it's still enjoyable. I would say I do prefer devastation and drama more than I prefer watching comedy.

Okay. So you love a good like, you're like, I'll take Schindler's List over Borat. Yeah. Yeah. Although I did enjoy Borat. But yes, I like documentaries and I like very heavy dramas. What's your current favorite?

heavy drama or doc for that matter. I'm always looking to have a list of things that I then won't watch. Well, yeah, that's the other thing about me is I don't really follow TV and film. I do follow documentaries more so. In fact, I'm producing a documentary right now. What do you, what tell me about your documentary? Well, we haven't really,

announce this anywhere so maybe i shouldn't have even brought it up so my apology or or or we could we could make news together well well i have other people i'm working with that might want to know i want to do yes exactly but um i will say it is the filmmakers that made uh pamela

You know that documentary? Yeah, very nice. And they also made The Keepers, a docuseries. But yeah, gosh, I mean, I can't even say this is a recent documentary that I saw. Maybe you're familiar with it. It is so devastating. I had to pause it three times to have a deep boo-hoo. I mean, it's so devastating. It's called Dear Zachary.

Okay, dear Zachary, going on the queue for... Rob, I want to warn you, this is so utterly devastating. It's like, it is so devastating. I'll tell you about my documentary I'm obsessed with then. The making of We Are the World.

I haven't seen that yet, but everybody's told me to watch that because I do love music. It's the best. It's so good. Yeah. I've always been obsessed with that song. And the reason I've mostly been obsessed with it was I always imagined what it would be like to be the person who has to tell everybody what they're going to sing and then gets to Kim Carnes.

Yes. And says, and Kim, you're going to sing and we. You should start stand up, Mr. Lowe. That's a good premise for stand up. Isn't it a good? I just want to I want to be in that room so bad.

Well, you know, the very similar song, the Christmas song, Do They Know It's Christmas? Oh, don't get me started on that. First of all, I think that's super insulting. Do they even know it's Christmas? Okay, well, don't even get me started on it because how about the line of... Thank God it's them instead of us or whatever? Yeah, thank God it's them instead of us. It's like, can you imagine being like, dear God, thank you so much... For the suffering of other people. Yeah, thank you. Thank you, God.

Do they know it's Christmas? Do they even know? Do they even know? And thank God it's them instead of us. Literally, that's the song. Rob, I know. I wrote about it in my book. Really? Yeah. Oh, God bless you. That's amazing. Yeah. I wrote about that, how that line has driven me insane. Yeah.

Since I was a kid, I was in like seventh or eighth grade. And I was like, well, tonight, thank God it's them instead of you.

Like, that's weird. By the way, it's not like it's buried in the song or given to Kim. And by the way, it's not Kim Carnes singing that. It's Bono. Yeah. I don't think I don't know this. In full Bono, let me tell you how to live. We should talk to Bono. Me and you should sit him down and say, listen, you've done excellent work. Excellent work, but... In music and charitable work, but...

What the hell is that? Maybe that's why he went on to do such amazing work. He's like, he realizes, like any of us, I see a rerun of something I've done, I'm like, oh, that sucked. What can I do to make amends with the world? What did you do that sucked? How long you got? ♪

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Qualifying plan required. Wi-Fi were available on select U.S. airlines. Deposit and Hilton Honors membership required for 15% discount terms and conditions apply. Okay, well, let me hit you with this. I think this is so bad, I don't think you could find it. But I turned down Grey's Anatomy to do a show called Dr. Vegas.

I got you to laugh. And by the way, true. So I get it with you, Tig. I figured you out. You only laugh at other people's deep pain and shame. Yes, yes, yes. Yeah.

Any more deep pain and shame? Yes, I said I love devastating things. No, you did. You did say. And that is devastating to know that you turned down Grey's Anatomy. But you might like to know my wife just guest starred on Grey's Anatomy. So she was a little smarter than you. No shit.

That is, you know, they're in like their 18th season, by the way, which show? They're in their 20th. Thank you. That's just what I need to hear. That's like, my wife Cheryl's always like, you could have been on there for 20 years. But you know what I say? But then I wouldn't have been on Parks and Recreation, which I love dearly. Would you have wanted to be on a show for 20 years? Here's what I would have done. I would have made so much money.

that I would have been able to go and do really things that I love that mean a ton to me that I may not otherwise be able to. It would finance the other areas of my life. What do you want to do that you can't do?

Well, I mean, it's not that I can't. I mean, like, I would love to move to New York and do a play for a year. I would love it. But you lose money. It's hard. You know what I mean? It's stuff like that. Travel or whatever. I mean, you know, directing takes a year out of your life. I directed. You know. You know what that's like. Isn't it the best, though? I love it so much.

It's not really my thing. My wife and I directed a movie. She was born a writer-director. She's so good. Whereas I'm, you know, as a director, you're obviously, you're steering the ship and everybody's coming up and...

saying things like, hey, should the pen on the table be purple or yellow? And I'm like, I can barely give a shit. Whereas Stephanie is like, oh my gosh, it should be purple. Here's why. And I'm like, yeah, boy, you take that. Yeah, that's exactly what you love about it. See, I got into the business for insert shots. Oh my God, that's amazing. I once saw

Bob Zemeckis, great, great direct, but Forrest Gump. Sure. You know, and on and on and on. Shoot an insert for at least 45 minutes on an insert shot, at least, if not longer. It was Bruce. It was Bruce Willis's hand. By the way, it wasn't even Bruce's hand at this point. I was going to say there's no world. It was Bruce's hand. No, there's no world. But, you know, people get, by the way, there's an art to the insert. How many times have you been asked to,

To like, okay, now it's a scene where you're looking at a photo of somebody you're investigating. You're looking at the photo. And then they got to show the photo. And they're like, okay, up, down. Wait, no, no. Okay, we have a reflection. Wait. You're like, Jesus Christ. I pride myself on being a one-take wonder when it comes to inserts, just so you know. That's incredible. I do my own. Listen, Tom Cruise.

Sure, does his own stunts, whatever. I do my own inserts. That's amazing. Isn't it? I think it's something. Nobody can hold a cup in focus better than me. Well, as I said, I got into the business for insert shots, so I do them regularly.

I do them myself as well. And gratuitously. Oh, my God. Movies where you go, I think there was way too much sex in this movie. There's like way too many insert shots. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like, here, maybe I should pull out another picture and we should look at that. Let me just flip through a bunch of pictures slowly. Oh. And then I'll put a text.

And then you can look at that. Is this the insider? No, I never worry about that. I see these people. I loved when I was a kid and I wanted to know about show business. I didn't know. Fuck all. I lived in Dayton, Ohio. Didn't know anybody. Had no connections. Know anything. You're from Ohio? Yeah.

Rob Lowe, I've got a special place in my heart for Ohio, but go ahead. And I do too. You know, there's something about Ohioans, you know, there really is. But I would listen to stuff that was so, the more inside baseball, the more I liked it because it really meant that I was learning something. Who's your baseball team?

Well, it's complicated. Obviously, it was the Reds growing up, Big Red Machine. I was there in Dayton for all of that. I mean, I would go and see Pete Rose and Johnny Bench and the greatest team ever assembled. And then the Reds sort of fell into disrepair and moved to LA. And over the years, the Dodgers wore me down. And now I'm diehard, diehard Dodger. Okay. Are you a baseball fan? No. But...

I have two boys that are... They will be eight in June, and they are so ridiculously athletic. They play baseball, basketball, soccer, swim team, tennis, everything they play. And our son, Finn, he wakes up at five every morning and checks stats. He has...

papers taped up all around our kitchen of handwritten stats that he transfers from my wife's phone to the wall. And he knows so much about baseball history. He watches replays of games from the 80s, 90s. No way. Oh, yes, sir. You have to turn him on

to this week in baseball, okay? He will lose his mind. I bet, here, I'll write it down. I bet he's aware. He has to know. So it's defunct. It hasn't been on since the early 90s. And in its heyday was the 70s and 80s. And it used to be literally, you had to wait for Saturdays to see any team's highlights because there was no regional, you know, there was only regional television. And the way it's photographed,

The sound effects, it just is the best. This week in baseball. Okay. Yeah, I will definitely bring it up to him. But I always tell people he is the kind of kid that could be on a talk show, but we would never put him on a talk show. But he...

It's mind-blowing, the information this child has. Is this a savant? I said he was since he was five. It's actually since he was four that he has. He can tell you the order of the lineup of the baseball players. He can imitate every swing. It's so outrageous. It's so outrageous. You know his speciality now as a parent. You just lean into that.

Oh. Where you have an issue, where one has an issue, is when you have kids that don't really, like, they don't have that kind of overarching preternatural passion. Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. There's real passion going on. That's great. Do you have any inkling to ever coach? Because I coached Little League for my kids. It was my favorite thing I ever did. It's the best. Are you going to coach at all, maybe?

I look like I would coach with my haircut, and I understand that, but I am not. Stephanie is more of the...

of the potential coach down the road. Yeah. But it is funny when like baseball season, they just started on their new team and, and, uh, and, um, like when we first started bringing them, you know, little league and then, you know, now whatever this league is that they're in, they, uh,

They were just so almost embarrassingly good. And all of the dads that had their kids on this team, they were running along the sidelines, just yelling, like, hit the ball!

Just going nuts. And then Stephanie and I are sitting there with, and I'm sorry to say, but our kids were the best players. And we're, you know, the lesbian couple shows up with the best players. We have two of them on the same team. And they're just like running circles around everyone. And it's bittersweet because we do have to say like, guys, other people have signed up.

You know, they want to play. Their parents want to see them play. That was happening in basketball, too, where it's like... You can't shoot every time you touch the ball. I know. And my son did a sky hook and got it.

Amazing. And both sides, like our team and their team, everyone jumped up screaming. And then, of course, he wouldn't stop shooting that. No. Shoot or shoot. Shoot or shoot, no matter what. Oh, I know what I need to ask you about. Is it true or did I... I have this in my notes about you, that you have two vintage motorcycles and you named them. Yeah. And their names are? Goldie Honda. Goldie Honda.

You know the answer, right? I do. I'm just setting you up. Okay. And what's the other one's name? Kurt Russell. That's right. Goldie Honda and Kurt Russell.

Now, was Goldie Honda first? And then you got another. And you went, well, it obviously has to be Kurt Russell. Yes. Yeah. So they have to stay together. Are they still together? I hope so. Oh, they're together. Okay. Yeah. Oh, yeah. But I am looking to sell Kurt Russell. If anybody wants it. It's a 1970 Honda CB350. But I'm holding on to Goldie. I love the idea of naming...

things after people. You know the comedian John Lovitz. John Lovitz names his pets after influential people. So Jerry Bruckheimer's longtime wife is Linda Bruckheimer. And John named his dog Linda Bruckheimer.

Just so he could say, my God, Linda Bruckheim is taking a shit in the yard again. It's so insane. I've never met him. Maybe I did briefly, like maybe 20 years ago or something. But there's somebody in our neighborhood that, oh my gosh, Stephanie and I love.

when we see her on our walks, because her dog's name is Party Girl. And so there's nothing better than hearing this woman say, Party Girl, no, get over here, Party Girl, just screaming at Party Girl. Well, I mean, they're like, of course, it's not nice to hear her screaming at an animal, but it's so ridiculous.

Because I don't know if she thought it through because she doesn't really seem like she has a sense of humor, but she also might just be like me and you where we don't laugh. That she could, inside she could be dying. Yeah. I always think it's important when you're naming an animal to yell it, yell the name, see how it sounds. Do you have animals? Oh my gosh, so many, too many. We were at one point had so many dogs that...

The county came and said, if you get one more animal, you're going to have to have a kennel license. Oh, I thought you were going to say you're going to win a prize. No, it was the government. Oh, okay. So it was, you know, more paperwork, of course. Yeah. Well, you know, what I do to figure out if a project I'm working on is good or not is I'll announce it as an Emmy or Oscar. Like, I'll be like, um...

you know, and the winner is, and then I'll have like somebody with me announce it. Like we're the two people at the podium at the award show. Like right now you and I should do it. Um, what, what show should we announce? Um, let's see. How about Sanford and son? Okay. Oh, great. Sure. Of course. Here we go. And the winner is,

Sanford, you have to say it with me. Okay, we say it together. Here we go. Let me finish opening the envelope. Okay, well, don't yell at me. I mean, I'm, you know. Here we go. You announce the category. Okay. Well, and best 1970s sitcom is, the winner is... Sanford and Son!

Is that a hit show? It's a total hit show. Okay, but I feel like we didn't announce it very well. Let's do Good Times now. Okay. And the best 70s sitcom is, the winner is? Good Times. That's a hit show.

That's a show. That is, well, you know, nobody can figure out how to announce anything anymore, though. That's a lost art. I mean, Warren Beatty, Oscars, right? And Faye Dunaway, they completely announced the wrong thing. Al Pacino, just now, there were 10 nominees for Best Picture. He didn't even mention them. He just goes, and it's Oppenheimer. Nobody knows how to do anything anymore.

See, I was on stage in Waterville, Maine the night of the Oscars, so I didn't see any of that. Oppenheimer. That's good. My other highlight was Arnold announcing best special effect. Godzilla. I didn't know. It took Arnold pronouncing things the way Arnold does for me to opposite. I always thought, is there a D in Godzilla? I always thought it was Godzilla with that little...

Godzilla? Godzilla? The lizard movie. Yeah, but it's Godzilla, not Godzilla. Godzilla. Yes. There's no D. Godzilla. Godzilla. And I thought it was Godzilla. Anyway, that was my, that's the, people would ask me, what was the highlight of the Oscars? Godzilla.

But I didn't laugh out loud. I thought it was funny. Yeah, yeah. But I said, that's funny. That's really funny. No, you probably said, hmm, I thought there was a D in that word. I did say that. Well, is there a D? Can somebody bring this up? There is. I can tell you. Okay, I'm not crazy. Yeah. Yeah.

All set for your flight? Yep. I've got everything I need. Eye mask, neck pillow, T-Mobile, headphones. Wait, T-Mobile? You bet. Free in-flight Wi-Fi. 15% off all Hilton brands. I never go anywhere without T-Mobile. Same goes for my water bottle, chewing gum, nail clippers. Okay, I'm going to leave you to it. Find out how you can experience travel better at T-Mobile.com slash travel.

Qualifying plan required. Wi-Fi were available on select U.S. airlines. Deposit and Hilton Honors membership required for 15% discount terms and conditions apply. Rob, I know that I'm your guest, but I have a question for you. Please. Which I'm sure you get asked all the time. What do you attribute to a long-lasting, I assume, happy marriage? I quote the great Alfred Hitchcock, I believe. They ask him, what is the secret secret?

to a successful movie? He said, casting. And I think it's, I really think the battle, 80% of it is won and lost right there. And then whatever additional it is, whatever percentage it is above and beyond that is work. You know what I mean? Which is, you know, I'm a big believer in therapy. I'm a big believer in like having a disinterested third party sort of mitigate discussions and

And you know what I mean? If stuff comes up and even if it doesn't, and it's really simple. I really think it's just that simple. And in the casting part of it, it's having being like-minded in worldview on as many things as you can possibly be. And like Cheryl and I don't disagree. We don't disagree politically. We don't disagree on how to raise our kids. We don't disagree on money. We don't disagree. And all of those things, I know plenty of marriages where people disagree

disagree on those real core issues. And that, I think, is super tough. Yeah. Does that make sense? Yeah, of course. I'm just always curious when somebody... Because I consider myself happily married and I hope to go the...

the long run with Stephanie. And I'm always curious when I know of somebody that's been with their spouse or partner for a long time. And we do. We live and work together very well. The other thing I think is being okay with the differences. Like Cheryl and I have way different opinions on what's funny. What does she think is funny? She likes...

like the broader, the better. Right. And, and, and so for me, it's the dryer, the better. Right. Yeah. And, um, and also loves a good potty joke. I am super anti, super anti potty jokes for whatever reason. I don't know why. Not like I'm some prude or whatever. Yeah. I've never laughed at a fart joke ever, ever.

That is so funny. That in itself is a fart joke, just so you know. The least funny sequence in Blazing Saddles is the fart sequence for me. I love this. I love this so much.

First of all, tell your wife to not ever watch my standup. And also, I hear you. I'm not crazy about... Well, I already said this. I don't watch a lot of comedy anymore. And it's just not really my thing. That sounds insane. I enjoy comedy. I enjoy doing it. But it's not my go-to. Well, here's the thing. And then we'll...

We'll wrap up. Here's my thing, though. Like, comedy, for whatever reason, today, like, I love the show The Bear. It's not, but it's not a comedy. Come on, guys. Yeah. Please. Won the Emmy for best comedy. It's not comedy.

I haven't seen it, but I've heard people say that, that it's not a comedy. The first episode of The Bear got me like... I was so strung out from it that I needed to practically drink NyQuil. Is it 30 minutes? Maybe that's what it is, is that if it's 30 minutes, it has to be a comedy. Yeah, maybe that's what it is. It's like when Edie Falco would win over Amy Poehler.

every year for Nurse Jackie for Best Comedic Actress. I was like, I love Edie Falco. She's one of my favorite actors ever. You mean to tell me that Nurse Jackie is funnier than Leslie Knope in Parks and Recreation? Really? So there's become a thing where it's become cool, and I'm going to use a French word butcher, de rigueur, to recognize...

edginess in comedy as opposed to actually laughing. I like to laugh. I like to think that I'm laughing and not laugh. No, you don't. I know. That's right. I like to think that I'm laughing and not actually laugh. You caught yourself there. You would love to laugh. I would love. You would love to love to laugh.

That's it. I want to say, I already don't laugh. So I don't need to watch The Bear. I'm already not laughing at a comedy. Sounds like I should watch The Bear. It sounds like my kind of comedy. It's fantastic. Not funny. Fantastic. It'd be funny if they threw Edie Falco in there. As the sous chef. Because, you know, it's about like making pastrami sandwiches. I know it's about cooking. Yeah. Yeah.

That's about all I know. The hilarious world of cooking. All right, I've been bitchy enough in this podcast. Do you think I've been bitchy? I don't know you. So you said you're curmudgeony. I wouldn't have guessed that. I wouldn't be like, I bet Rob Lowe is...

I'm not Larry David. Okay. I'm not on that level. I'm curmudgeon-y about certain very, very specific silo of things. It seems like I would say you just have a strong opinion about certain things. I wouldn't be like this curmudgeon-y guy. But yeah, you seem very pleasant and easy. Okay.

But maybe I don't know some. I imagine I don't know a lot of things about you. And you probably don't know a lot of things about me. No, there's more to be revealed. I'm going to learn a lot about you in Hello Again, premiering March 26th on Amazon Prime. I'm going to learn a lot more. A lot more. You'll learn even more if you listen to my podcast called Handsome. Can I be on it?

Yeah, that was going to be my next question. Here's the thing is we don't even interview people. We just have guests submit a video of themselves asking us a question and answering that same question.

So let me ask you this. I don't want you to reveal anything, but tell me, you pick the question or the guest picks the question? The guest picks the question. It's me. Do you know Fortune Feimster? I know the name, yes. Okay. You're not likely to forget that name. No. And May Martin. It's the three of us and somebody...

submits any question they want to ask the handsome podcast. And then we just riff on that question. And then at the very end of the show, we play the guests answer to their own question and we riff briefly on that and then we're done. And that way nobody has to even record anything with us. Well, I know mine is why would anybody ever eat in a factory? Okay.

Well, then you need to make a legitimate video. You can't use this as your video. Can I use any of the bits from this? You can use all of them. I'm not going to tell you what to do. All right. You're Rob Lowe. I want a seat at the Cheesecake Factory away from the conveyor belt, please. That's all I ask. Well, I don't know that we can make that happen for you, but you can ask us something about the Cheesecake Factory. Okay.

I'm in. I'm so in. This is like appeals to my level of silliness. Right. The sillier, the better. Our show, Handsome, is the most silly thing you might ever listen to. I'm so down. I'm so down with... That's the thing. Like the sillier, the better. My wife, Cheryl...

She doesn't like it when I'm silly. And I'm like, don't you understand? That's part, that's what you sign up for. Farts are silly. And she loves farts. Yeah, I don't. Yeah. And then, and yet I don't. I mean, it's a conundrum. Have you ever heard her do that? No. Are you fucking kidding me? So that's the secret to 33 years of marriage. For sure. Mystery. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, it's like, would you do that on a first date? No, but I'd do it on a last date. That's right. Or you do it on the day before the divorce papers go out. You do it then. But you're making fart jokes right now, Roblo. Elliptically, I am. Elliptically, glancingly. Still a fart joke. No, technically, you're right. By God, I've learned something. And that's why I do this, to learn something new every day.

Tig, this is fun. Thank you so much. Let's get you up for pickleball with Ellen. Let's do it. Let's do it up. Sounds good. Get me your question and your answer for handsome. I will. As they say in Hollywood, have your people call my people so we can do this because I do want to do it. I'll go get people. Find some people. I'll find people. Find, find. And they'll get in touch with your people. Excellent. Thank you so much. Thank you.

Well, everybody, don't forget Tig Notaro. Hello again. It is on Amazon Video. Streaming now. Streaming this very second. All right. Just one more thing before we end today's episode. Let's check the lowdown line. Hello. You've reached literally in our lowdown line where you can get the lowdown on all things about me, Rob Lowe. 323-570-4551. So have at it. Here's the beep.

Hey Rob, this is Glenn in Birmingham, Alabama. Love the podcast. So the other night I was at Bar Trivia and thanks to having recently watched Wayne's World, which is one of my favorite movies, I got a question right by knowing that Hong Kong is near Kowloon Bay. So I wanted to know, what's one of your favorite pieces of worldly knowledge that you've picked up from being in a film or a TV show? Hmm.

Look forward to hearing your answer. Thanks. Bye. Oh, wow. Glenn, that's a really good question. Kowloon Bay, by the way, that was an ad lib in Wayne's World. I had just been on a trip and we were trying to make Benjamin, my character, seem worldly. And I pitched that and it made it into the movie. And I'm glad it was educational.

Look, for sure, I mean, listen, I was in the West Wing. You wanna talk about insane trivia that you get to learn every episode is jam-packed with trivia. I like that, what is the device in, see if you can answer this, you're a trivia guy, and then I'll tell you, because I learned it on Western. What is the name of the device that the Secret Service uses in the White House to track what room

the president and the first lady are currently in. I'll give you five seconds. One, two, three, four, five. He didn't answer. It's called the toaster. The toaster is the device the Secret Service uses within the White House to track the location of the first lady and Secret Service. And you're welcome.

Good question. Thanks, man. Thank you guys for listening. Hope you had fun. Next week, next Thursday, there is a new episode of literally tell your friends, spread the word, and I will see you then.

You've been listening to Literally with Rob Lowe, produced by me, Sean Doherty, with help from associate producer Sarah Begar and research by Alyssa Growl. Engineering and mixing by Joanna Samuel. Our executive producers are Rob Lowe for Low Profile, Nick Liao, Adam Sachs, and Jeff Ross for Team Coco, and Colin Anderson for Stitcher. Booking by Deirdre Dodd. Music by Devin Bryant. Sponsored by...

Special thanks to Hidden City Studios. Thanks for listening. We'll see you next time on Literally.

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