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cover of episode The First Steps to Find Love with Matthew Hussey

The First Steps to Find Love with Matthew Hussey

2024/11/26
logo of podcast A Bit of Optimism

A Bit of Optimism
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专注于电动车和能源领域的播客主持人和内容创作者。
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Matthew Hussey 认为寻找爱情的关键不在于放弃对伴侣的高标准，而是将这些标准转向那些真正能预测良好关系的方面，例如善良、同理心、信任和一致性。他强调，最初的化学反应和激情虽然令人兴奋，但这并不代表一段关系的可行性。他建议人们避免过度焦虑和过度投资，不要过早地下结论，要关注双方是否能组成一个优秀的团队，以及是否能够在关系中共同成长。他还建议人们要学会感恩，关注自己所拥有的一切，而不是关注自己所缺少的东西。在处理不安全感方面，他认为坦诚地面对和处理不安全感至关重要，并且一段安全的关系可以帮助人们过滤掉不合适的伴侣。他认为，爱自己并非要先达到某种完美的状态，而是要像对待他人一样对待自己，并且要将自己视为需要被照顾和关爱的个体。 主持人则分享了自己在寻找爱情过程中的一些困惑和经验，例如曾让父母选择约会对象，以及在遇到心仪对象时会想要花所有时间陪伴对方等。他还表达了对现代科技和社交媒体影响人们寻找爱情的担忧，以及对如何判断谁才是适合自己的人的疑问。 主持人总结了寻找爱情过程中的矛盾之处，例如不能完全相信直觉、不能过早投资等，并表达了对如何平衡安全感和惊喜感的困惑。

Deep Dive

Chapters
Matthew Hussey discusses the common mistakes people make in relationships, emphasizing the importance of high standards and the dangers of initial chemistry.
  • High standards should be applied to areas that predict great relationships.
  • Initial chemistry can be intoxicating but doesn't guarantee relationship viability.

Shownotes Transcript

Finding love is a journey. We might take some wrong turns along the way.

Matthew Hussey helps people find love, and sometimes, redefine their relationship with love. Matthew is a dating coach who balances practical advice about the art of attraction with the importance of centering our own sense of self in our search for love. Starting as a teenager and working primarily with women, he’s helped thousands of people find romance and create relationships built on values which feel right for them. 

I sat down with Matthew to ask him everything he’s learned about love after decades as a dating coach. He shares with me the most common mistakes people make when looking for a partner, what we ought to be looking for, and why our own happiness is ultimately our own responsibility, not anyone else’s.

This…is A Bit of Optimism.

To learn more about Matthew and his work, check out:

his new book, Love Life)

his YouTube channel )

matthewhussey.com)