Christmas Horror Stories | Trash Taste #29
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- Hello and welcome to another episode of Trash Taste. I am your host for today, Gigguk, and with me are the usual boys. And today we have a very special guest with us. No one. It's just me today. I finally- - I thought you were about to be like, "We have a very special guest, me, by myself." - It's Gigguk, the Anime Zone, and Steve Handjobs, who has been left at home today.

- You really did wear a turtle neck. - I did not wear a turtle neck today. - In the Christmas spirit, I brought you guys gifts. You didn't get me any. - Oh. - Can't believe it. - Yes, so this is apparently gonna be our Christmas special. - No, it's not. - This is a Christmas special. - This is our Christmas special that we are not

- Wow, you like wrapped it up and everything. - Holy shit, you actually wrapped it up. What the fuck? - Yeah, sure, I wrapped it up. - By the way, Merry Christmas, 'cause I think this should be airing on Boxing Day, right? - Yeah. - Do Americans have Boxing Day? Maylynn, do Americans have Boxing Day? - Boxing Day is the day after Christmas Day.

- Okay. - There's Jerry's. All right, so they may be writing on the thing. - Right. - So the box is fine, so you can open it up, right? But they may be writing on the thing in Japanese. Jerry, ignore it, don't read it. Just- - Okay, I'll- - Okay, so you can just open the box now, but when inside, I think there'll be a label on it. Just don't read the label, Jerry. - Okay. - Gone, it might be in kanji, so you should be fine. - Okay, well, I can't read it anyway, so I'm all good.

- But yeah, to explain what Boxing Day is, isn't Boxing Day the actual day you were meant to open your presents? - I don't fucking know. - Isn't that why it's called Boxing Day? - Is that what it's called? - Yeah, I think that's why it's called Boxing Day. - It was just the day you ate all the leftovers. - I always thought Boxing Day was an event where everyone boxes it out. - Oh, it's a little music box. - So don't open yours yet, right? - Okay.

- You might wanna play it up to the microphone as well so they can hear it. Everyone needs to be silent. - Let me play this. - Guess the song. - Yeah, guess the song. - Is this your name? Yes! Oh my God, thank you so much. Where'd you get this? - I think I know exactly where you got this from. All right, I'm not gonna look at the label. - Don't look at the label, Joey. I've got Joey something too. - All right, I have to wait for yours to shut up. Wait, wait, wait, let's nightcore Zenzenzen. - Oh shit. - I think it just stops it. - Huh? - I think it just stops it.

I can hear it. Oh.

- That one, right? Well, that's also your name, right? - It's the same band, right? - Yeah, it's Radwimps. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I think it's the ending. - 'Cause Joey always sings a song at karaoke. - Yeah, so it's- - I don't sing this one at karaoke. - Do you know what I think you did? - No, no, I sing a fucking, I sing Zen, Zen, Zen, Zen mostly. - Oh, do you? - I like the Zen and the one from "Weathering With You." - Yeah, "Weathering With You." - I like this song as well. - We have a bunch of musical boxes. - Yay! - I don't know if you can hear in the background, but.

- It's just going on now. I shouldn't have winded it so much. - Yeah. So yeah, Boxing Day is the day after Christmas. Do you have Boxing Day in Australia? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, we do. - I don't know if the mic is picking up. It is loud as fuck in this room right now.

- I think I know exactly what you got as well too. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Because I bought one as well. - Oh, did you? - Yeah, yeah. - Is it like Ghibli ones as well? - Yeah, yeah. - But I saw anime songs and I was like, I should buy anime songs for the boys. - I got one actually, which was like a Vulpix from Pokemon. - I saw that, I saw that one. - Yeah, that one was really cute. - This is an awesome gift though. - Yeah, there you go. - I could easily give this to all my friends. - You're welcome boys. Thanks so much. - Thank you very much.

- I'll get your present soon, don't worry. - It's not like we literally just decided this was the Christmas episode the day of recording. - Yeah, we didn't know this was gonna be the Christmas episode. - I just thought I'd bring a gift. I'll be nice, I saw it. Wow, it's really good. - It's just fucking going. It just keeps going, doesn't it? - Maylee, do you wanna have this for now? - Yeah, do you wanna hold onto this? Just get it off screen. - Yeah. - Put it on my desk, it should be fine.

- Yeah, but- - It'll turn off naturally. Don't turn it anymore. - Yeah, yeah, just leave it, just leave it. Just let it sit on the desk, you'll be fine. Yeah, but I know exactly where you got those from because you took a trip, didn't you? - I did, I did. I went up to Hokkaido, but it's all good. It was just a chill little vacation, just relaxing, it was nice. - Every YouTuber needs a vacation every now and again, right? - Yeah, just ate all their food. Food's amazing. - I told you, they've optimized their food, right? - It's good, man, it's good. It's as good as everyone says it is. You should go, go if you get the chance. - What are some like,

like specific dishes that you had up there that you would recommend to people who want to go to Hokkaido? - Man, anything with milk in it is just like the best. - Does it meet the hype? 'Cause I've heard so much about Hokkaido milk and what is so good about the milk there? - It's like the breed of cow, right? - I don't know, man, it's just rich. It's real rich. - It's like full cream. - Right, and I had like a milk ice cream. I don't normally like milk ice cream, but it was just like intense milk hit you.

- I saw you posted a picture of like beer ice cream as well. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - Just to prove that Japan does every flavor of soft serve. I don't know why you'd ever want beer ice cream. - Yeah, there was like ice cream that was just beer. And I was like, I mean, sure, I'll try it. I like both these things individually. - Even alcoholics are like, "Dah." - "Dah, this will be good." - It tasted like shit. - I can't imagine a beer flavored anything aside from beer and it tasted nice. - Imagine like a musky ice cream. - Yeah. - What's the weirdest flavor of ice cream you've had?

- Rum, I'm joking. - How dare you? - Probably the beer. - Probably the beer, right? I've normally, I don't know. - I've had fish ice cream before. - Oh, that sounds disgusting. - Yeah, it was like a salmon ice cream. - They just, they do that shit here with food. They're like, I don't care about the boundaries. I like both these things. Let's make it into food. - That's like the equivalent of fucking what some Americans do, which is like buying a McFlurry and then just dipping it with fries. - Okay, but actually- - Which just blows my mind. - Okay, but actually I kind of like that.

- No, no, no. - What? - It's pretty good. - I went to, dude fucking, Aki took me to a steak and shake once, which is where like the optimal place of where you do that. And I just saw like six Americans dipping their fries into their shakes. I'm just like, I can't be here. I have to leave. - We're living in a first world country, dude. Why are you eating like this?

- Honestly, like I don't do it often, but it tastes pretty good when I've done it. - I don't get it. It's like, oh, it's like a nice, it's the synergy of the saltiness of the fries and the sweetness of the shakes. I'm like, no. - I don't understand why it works. It just does, right? - It doesn't. - Also steak and shakes like the most depressing place in America. Like I went to one at like midnight. Cause I was like, yeah. - Maybe it's because you went

- There was a dollar 50 burgers. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Jesus Christ. - I don't know man, you've never been to a White Castle before. That's true. - I have never been to a White Castle before. Does it meet the hype? - White Castle, the hype of what? - I don't know, 'cause I only know White Castle 'cause of that one movie. - Right. - What was it, Harold and Kumar or something like that? - Oh yeah. - So White Castle doesn't sell burgers, they sell sliders.

- Okay. - Right, so it's like the tiny burgers like this. - Yeah, what's the difference between a burger and a slider? - It's like a mini burger, right? - A slider is just like a mini burger, apparently. - Right. - I don't know where it comes from, but basically they sell sliders instead of burgers. - Right. - But like normally, right, like when you buy a slider, it's like, you know, you go to some American restaurants and I like me like, you know, like my chicken Parmesan sliders, like that shit's bomb. - I say it like that.

- Parmesan? - Parmesan. - Parmesan slider. - Oh, what do you say? - No, just the way you added the- - Chicken parmesan slider. - Parmesan. - Parmesan. - I just wanna call it Parmesan, right? - Parmesan. - Parmesan, yeah. - Parmesan, yeah. - Oh, dude, that hurts me hearing that. - All right, go ahead, James. - Yeah, anyway, that chicken, like my favorites are like the chicken parmesan sliders, right? So it's like the chicken parmesan, then you put like some lettuce in it. It's fucking nice.

but White Castle Sliders is literally just two soggy buns and like the thinnest patty in existence. It's like paper thin patties. And it's like, you can get like a pack, like a six pack of- - Six pack of sliders. - It's like a six, it is, it's like they box it like a six pack of sliders for like $4 or something. I'm just like, this is true depression. - All I know is that everyone I know who goes there has like the shits afterwards. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - Which is like,

Like to me, that's like how on earth we've got to the point where that's just an acceptable outcome. - How is it that like Americans have gauged like the tastiness of a fast food joint by how much this stomach is just destroyed the next day? Like people are like, oh yeah, it's not a good chili's meal unless I'm shitting myself constantly the next day. - I feel the same with Indian though.

Like I have to destroy the toilets after I get Indian. So I kind of get it, but at the same time I can only do it like at most once every few weeks. - But like a burger shouldn't do that. Like Indian, I've always accepted that Indian does that. - Yeah, because of the spices, right? - Yeah, it's all the spices. But then it's just like bread and meat. What is happening? Like what went wrong? - It's the oil.

- Yeah, okay, you know also the most egregious thing that I hate they do is that they put the grease on top of the burgers. That's disgusting. Who did this? And who likes it? 'Cause I remember I went to Steak and Shake and they did this to my burger and I was like, "Well, I don't want this anymore. "Why would you do this?" It's like you took the worst part of the meat, which is the part that makes you feel sick, and you put it on top. Why?

- I remember when I was staying at Sydney's like family's house in Wisconsin and they got like a takeaway pizza joint one day. And one of the big selling points of this like takeaway pizza joint is they had like garlic bread. And the selling point was that if you put like a paper towel on the garlic bread, it would literally soak it in oil.

And they were hyping this up to be like, yo, if you put the, if there's so much oil on this, that if you put the wet paper towel, it will soak it and it'll become completely wet. And I'm just thinking, how is this a selling point?

Why would I want to eat this? - That's like that Simpsons episode when Homer's trying to get so fat that he gets the disability thing. And Dr. Nick's like, "Grab the burger, rub it against a piece of paper, and then go see through, you can eat it." - I thought it was a joke. I thought it was satire. But no, they literally marked it as this garlic bread is so oily that you can literally soak up an entire paper towel. And I just think about that. And I'm just like,

I hold it in my hands and it was literally dripping. And I took one bite and one bite was enough for me. - That's like the pure survival food. 'Cause the sheer amount of oil could like power a lamp. - Have you ever heard of this American burger joint called the Heart Attack? - Yeah, of course, of course. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're fucking, I was watching a video yesterday of this guy who ate the biggest one there, which is called the quadruple bypass burger. And it's literally, think of a Big Mac

- But stacked six Big Macs on top of one another. - It's ridiculous. - Yeah. And it was like, I already thought that it was like 20,000 calories as well. And this guy like demolishes it in five minutes. I don't know how the fuck he did it. But the part that got me was he was like, "All right, we're getting to the bun now." The bun by the way is soaked in lard. I'm like, "You shouldn't, you shouldn't." - That's so vile.

- A piece of bread should not be soaked in anything. - Nothing should be soaked in pure fucking fat. - Yeah. - Oh yeah, also the fries were oiled in pure lard as well. - That's disgusting. - And you get a shake on top of that. - I don't understand the appeal of that. That's just ridiculous. - It just sounds gross. It looked gross. It looked like something out of the alien movies. I didn't want to put that in my stomach. - Why do people hate their bodies?

- There's only like some, let's say cuisines you can only enjoy when you want to like destroy your body. And that's probably at like 3:00 AM after like a fucking- - Out of five guys. - Yeah, out of five guys or like,

I can never eat a kebab sober. Like something has gone wrong with me. Like something has gone wrong with my life. If I'm eating a kebab and I'm completely sober. - You know I'm hella depressed when I'm eating a kebab for lunch. - I love a great like burger with a bit of grease on it. - Yeah. - Just a little bit of grease.

- Yeah. - Like sometimes you need that, but there's like, there's a clear line. - Yeah. - And not even drunk me would pass. - Yeah. - Right? And the heart attack grill to me is just like, there is no reason why I would wanna come here other than to feel healthy.

- Yeah, because any meal you have after going to the Heart Attack Grill, you'll be like, damn. - You see the other patrons and you're like, oh, I'm doing pretty good for myself, hey. Like, damn, okay, maybe I am in shape. - Yeah, because I think the selling point of the Heart Attack Grill is that, first of all, when you walk in, they put on a hospital gown on you and they sit you in a wheelchair to wheel you in. And here's the kicker, if you weigh over 300 pounds, you get the meal for free.

- I feel like it should be the opposite. You should be like, it's like taxing the rich, right? If you're already fat, you should be charging at least triple to force you to maintain this egregious weight. - I feel like the concept of a heart attack grill is just kind of like,

you hear it and you're like, this is like fiction, right? This is from like some dystopian society. - Yeah, this is from like some George Orwell novel. - Yeah, I know, right? Like this is how they fatten you up before they dispose of you. - Yeah, exactly. - You know when you watch these like 500 pound like live videos. - Oh, 600 pound live? - Yeah, that one, whatever. And you watch it and you realize like most of these people just have like trauma.

Like at what point do we like start being like, okay, maybe it's not trauma if he's walking into the heart attack grill. Maybe that's on him. You know what I mean? Like I think that's going beyond a point of like comfort food and there's gotta be like, all right, this is just his fault. You know what I mean?

Because these shows, these videos with like these 600 pound people do a really fucking good job at making you feel sorry for them and be like, "Yo man, okay." Like his parent died at like five. - Yeah, eating disorder and stuff like that. - For some reason at the age of five, his mom was taking him to the heart attack grill and that's the only way that she can remember him. And it's like,

Okay, I get it, I sympathize with you, but should you? It's like, what if my parents were like, well, they've just left me crack. It's all I've had since the age of 10. Would I be like doing crack? It's just comfort, it's comfort food. - It's comfort food. - To me, it's like, there's a clear limit to the point where you gotta be like, all right,

I should stop feeling sorry for you. - Oh no, I never watched those shows to like feel sorry or anything. - Well, 'cause I've noticed I watched them and they do a really good job making you think, damn, like I guess that could be me. - That's the thing, they set it up as a sob story, but what you're seeing and what you're hearing is like the complete opposite. - Two different things. - It's two entirely different things. - I think that as someone who was a little chubbier, not nowhere near that level, like I get it, I get how you can gain weight, but there's like a limit.

of where I think that it would go beyond anything. 'Cause some of these they're eating like, I don't know, like fucking 15 hot dogs in the morning with like cheese and chili on it. I'm like, I think I would draw the line.

- I think that's right. - Well, that's the thing, right? It's like the thing that surprised me more is not the fact that they're like complaining about having all this weight problems and then they proceed to eat a whole fucking box of chilies, right? But it's also just the egregious amount of food that they can somehow stomach. I'm like, yeah, it just looking at it makes my stomach. - It just doesn't make sense to me. And I feel like,

you must have just grown up with this. And because every time I go to America, I always like the food portions in there, we've talked about this before, are massive. I'm forced to have to have these massive food portions and like the first week, fucking great. After a week of staying in America- - I wanna go home. - I'm like,

is there a salad? And I asked for the salad and what comes out is a fucking forest. You know what I mean? Like this ain't a fucking salad. - It's like six heads of lettuce in a bowl. - The amount of dressing is like the same as the meal. Like it's like 1600 calories. - It's like one of my fucking rabbit. - I'm like did you deforest the entire Amazon rainforest just to put on my plate? Like this is the,

kind of like food portions we're talking about here. - It sucks man, 'cause it's so unfair because if you get fat in Japan, I feel like that's on you. But if you get fat in America, it's like, well, everything was set up against you. - Welcome to the system. - Everything was set up to make you fat. So it's like how the fuck, it's not fair, which is why- - 'Cause my diet in America is awful, obviously 'cause of the food. - I was saying whenever I go there. - But also, I get to the point where I want to have something, but something,

something not greasy and especially like in the Midwest where it's like, you know, where it's like the countryside, there's a lot less choice and a lot of healthy choices as well. So you kind of forced to be like, hey, you can have,

you kind of have to cook for yourself. And if you can't cook for yourself, then you're pretty much fucked. And that's why it's so much harder to eat healthy over there than it is say in like Japan. - Yeah, but even then in America, I remember I went to Walmart and I was like, okay, let's get some healthy food. And it was really hard to find like the actual like stuff, the actual healthy like stuff. And then I go to the next aisle, there's a whole aisle, this blew my mind, of hot dogs.

a whole aisle of hot dogs, not sausages, hot dogs. And I was like, this is insane. I thought there was only one type of hot dog. I didn't realize that hot dogs were any different from each other 'cause they all taste the same. Hot dogs never taste any different. Do you ever notice it when you go to your friend's barbecue or whatever and they give you a hot dog? Have you ever been like, wow, this tastes different from my hot dog? - No. - No, it's always like I put mustard on it.

but that's how you differentiate it. They all taste the fucking same. - I mean, it's all the different like brands. - Yeah, and somehow they had like 10 rows on a whole aisle of hot dogs. I was blown away. I was like, this is insane. - I mean, I think like there is difference in like sometimes it's like filled with cheese and sometimes it's- - That's vile. Don't do that. I don't want that. - Really? - No, I like that. - I really don't like that. - No, no, no, no. - I like a bit of spice in my hot dog. - Because this is American cheese we're talking about.

That's not real cheese. If it was filled with actual like real cheese, then yeah, I'd be a little more open to it. - I'm pissed off that they've managed to infiltrate Japan somehow. Because whenever you get anything with cheese on top of it here, it's such a gamble whether it's American fucking squishy. - Plasticky cheese, yeah. - Fucking Americans. - See, this is the advantage of not putting condiments in everything.

I can actually taste the fucking difference between a normal hot dog and a cheese hot dog and like- - Yes, because that is an important life skill, isn't it? - Yes, I know. I can differentiate between 10 different brands of hot dogs. - Because otherwise, that's why if you just put condiments on it all the time, then it just tastes like the condiments, right? You don't get to taste the subtle cheese in a different. - Do you think we're like fucking drowning out hot dogs in sauce? - Honestly, it kind of looks like it a lot of the times.

- Jesus Christ. - If I gave you five brands of generic hot dogs, would you be able to tell the difference between any of them? 'Cause I wouldn't be able to. - That just sounds like a trash taste special. - I mean, I'm not that big of a fan of hot dogs, but I mean, I can- - What is like a food that you could like, if we gave you like different types of it, that you'd be able to differentiate?

- Not tap water. - Tap water. - I can differentiate between tap water and like normal water, but not like say- - Everyone can. - Not say like Voss water. I don't understand Voss water. - That shit's bullshit. - What the fuck's Voss water? - Have you never heard of Voss water? It's like the really, really posh water that comes in a glass bottle.

You can see it on screen now. And it's only at like the really high class hotels. And I've sampled one before, I remember, 'cause it was like, I was really, really thirsty and it was the only water available. And it just tastes like water. - There is no difference between

the bottled water brands, I'm convinced. And then when you watch how half of them fucking get their water, half of it comes from the same fucking place, which is just the normal taps that all the people are using in the area. - Oh dude, you know what's the one type of person that I'll never be friends with? When someone will take a sip of water and being like, "Oh, this is hard water. Can I get some soft water please?"

- I know people like that in California, fucking hate you. - I knew someone who could only drink a brand of, I can't remember which brand it was, might've been Evian. - Evian. - And they literally refused to use any other water. And if they used boiled water, like in like cup noodles, had to be boiled Evian.

- I don't know, man. I don't like tap water. Like I have gone through a phase where I've only drunk water. - Dan gets one million views on YouTube and then this is what happens, man. He's like, "Only Evian for me." - Well, I mean, because is tap water drinkable in the UK? - Yeah, it's drinkable in the UK. Where I live, I've grown up where everywhere I've lived in my life, tap water has sucked.

And I've heard about this mythical good tap water that people talk about sometimes. Connor's one of those people. - Come to Australia, bro. We have great tap water. - I've always had like shitty tap water. - It depends 'cause like if you get it from a quarry- - To me, this clearly tastes like tap water. 'Cause like if I can taste,

the sink in tap water, then it's like inferior water for me. I don't wanna taste something metallic. I don't wanna, sometimes I get the hard water thing. 'Cause sometimes I drink tap water and I'm like, I feel more dehydrated. I feel even more dehydrated than when I first drank this water. This video is sponsored by Rage Shadowland. Badass champions, tough bosses, millions of players, years of content and regular updates. - Do you like fighting noble kings and dark wizards? - I do. - Well, Joey, you're in the

because Raid has all of that for you. - Raid? - You will uncover prophecies, curses,

Betrayals, and my childhood friend. - Raid. - Shadow Legends. So use my links below to download Raid yourself to your mobile phone or PC. Now I don't wanna be on the topic of raids boys, but what is that tree doing raiding our set? - What? What is that? - Who are those three champions next to the tree gentlemen? - Is that Sir Nicholas, Rain Beast, and Frostbringer? - Now personally gentlemen, my favorite thing about Raid: Shadow Legends

- Raid. - Raid is that it plays itself. It has an auto mode. So if there's some missions that are too grindy, you can just let the game play it. And did you know that you can summon champions at the tavern, gentlemen? - How many champions? - As many as you want, Joey. - Really? So what's new in Raid? Well, let me tell you. This month, Raid just released their biggest ever

- Update in Raid: Shadow Legends. - I heard the main event is Doom Tower, Garnt. Is that true? - And what's that? Is it a tower with 120 floors? - I could barely contain my excitement, Garnt. - A bunch of secret challenge rooms and 12 seriously

- Badass bosses that you have to take on. - I cannot wait to raid Shadow Legends, those bosses. - Raid. - On top of that, they're also releasing 14 awesome new champions just in time for the holidays, along with a whole host of holiday events and tournaments. - There's never really been a better time to start playing. And here's the best part. The raid team are giving away a bunch of new free goodies. - Oh my God. - No way. - Plus, gentlemen, don't get your chubs up yet. Plus a super special champion to help get everyone started in the tower, Bulwark. - And not only that,

50 gems in XP boosters some energy refills and even an ancient shard as soon as you get in

- That's in-game. - You can find my account here on screen right now. So if you wanna go and even join my clan perhaps, go ahead gamers. And it's just that easy. Gentlemen, all you gotta do is click that link in the description down below, or as I like to say, raid that link in the description down below. And I'll see you gamers inside. - Thank you to Raid for sponsoring this video. I feel like the best time to like really judge how good water is, is when you're hung over.

'Cause when I'm hung over, there are definitely different levels. I feel different levels of hydration when I'm hung over. 'Cause I need, when you're feeling like shit and you just want to feel hydrated again, that's when like, I will stick by the bottled water every time over tap water. I mean, I'll take tap water.

- I just drink a liter of whatever is near me. - Oh dude, like if I'm like, depending on how hungover I am, I'll fucking drink a liter of toilet water. Like anything to just get something like fucking fluid in me. - What do you mean you can drink toilet water, it's clean. - Yeah, I know, that's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying, right? It's like- - You ever like turn your bidet on and go.

- I have seen a Japanese YouTuber do that before. - Oh God. - And it didn't go out well. - But yeah, I don't know. I guess maybe it's because at least in Sydney, like out it's like bottled water is almost non-existent in Sydney because legitimately the tap water is just as good as the bottle water. - Right. - And also bottle water in Australia is fucking expensive.

a bottle like that big is like $4. - I only buy bottled water because I'm out and I can't just find a tap to drink out of. - Well, I mean here, right? - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah, no, here, like, because you know, bottled water is cheap, right? It's like a hundred yen. So it's a little bit more affordable. But in Australia, if someone was like, "Yeah, I'm just gonna go to the Woolies and buy a $4 bottle of water." - What about water fountains? Do you drink from water fountains?

- I mean, I drink from water fountains when I am desperate enough. - It depends where. - Yeah, it depends on where. - And how clean or dirty the water fountain is. - I feel like a lot of this has come up from my upbringing 'cause in Thailand you can't drink tap water. So I've just gotten used to being like always by bottled water. - That makes sense. - But like I do genuinely think the taste of tap water tastes like shit where I am. Like I can taste the chalk where I,

- In Japan? - No, in Brighton. In Brighton. In Japan, it just tastes metallic. It tastes really metallic and I'm not a fan of the metallic taste. - I mean, it was nice in Wales and it was kind of meh in London and here I filter it. - But in London, it fucking sucks, man. - Yeah, London, I don't know. But like London, you're getting that like cholera shit, dude.

I don't trust the water in London. I mean, Wales is nice. The quarry was right next to me as well. - I feel like because I don't know how it is in other countries, but everywhere I've been to where it's like a big city, normally I don't tap water tastes like shit. - Countryside is good. - Yeah. Like if you're in a hotel and you're really thirsty, do you go for the bathroom water?

Or do you go for the fridge mini bar water? - Well, you pay for it. - Yeah. - No fucking way am I paying for that water. - No, no, I'm not paying for that. I'm going straight to the tap. - No way. - No, 'cause that's the worst tasting water. The hotel bathroom water is like the worst. - Nah, dude. - That's where I draw the line. That's where I draw the fucking line. - I am never paying for water in a hotel. Are you fucking kidding me? - That's ridiculous. It's like...

I feel like a hotel is the one place that should not be allowed to charge for water. Like I'm literally paying- - You're already charging up the ass to stay in the room. - I'm paying for a basic necessity, which is just like being somewhere and you're gonna charge me for water? Fuck off. - Yeah, no way. - This episode is sponsored by ExpressVPN. Going online without ExpressVPN is like not having a case on your phone.

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- I mean, for me, I genuinely can't taste the fucking difference anyway. So if I'm like- - Shout out to hotels that give you bottled water for free. - Yeah, shout out to, you are the real Gs. - Yeah. - So I don't have to fucking go through your Voss water. - And not like just one bottle, they give you like four and they're like, go ham, man. We refill them all every day. - And the best is like when you come back from a day out and the bottles are like bad as well. That's the good shit. - On the topic of food, so with it being Christmas right now and everyone's just had

their Christmas meals and everything like that. What are your preferences in your Christmas meals?

- Because I'll be honest, so last year we all celebrated Christmas together and we had a hot pot. - Not the traditional Western. - It was a great fucking hot pot, but I ain't gonna lie, it just felt like something was missing. - Yeah, it's not the fucking turkey and whatever you get. - The chicken, stuff like that. - Okay, I will say this, I think turkey's overrated as fuck, man.

- I don't understand the hype behind turkey. - I like turkey. - I think turkey is just like an inferior chicken. - It is, it is right? Like imagine chicken, but just drier with less taste. That's just turkey. Like I don't understand why all the holidays- - You know what it is? It's someone who just got a turkey and just went into Photoshop and did this. It's like everything is thinner. It's just bigger. - I think if you have like a real nice turkey, like that's been like seasoned well, I think it could be better than turkey.

- The problem with Turkey is that if even if it's seasoned well, right? You get the outer part and that's nice and seasoned but then you get to the inner fucking dry off. - That's why you gotta cook it. You gotta cut it in a way where you get like the skin and the meat in the same bite. - But you can do that with chicken. - Yeah but- - And with less price. - Yeah but I feel like you can make a Turkey like skin taste better than chicken.

- I don't know, it depends. - Maylene agrees and you know, Maylene- - Yeah, but Maylene's American. - So if you don't like turkey then, do you like any other meats? 'Cause sometimes my family used to do like duck or ham. - My dad would make like a roast ham. - Yeah, like roast pork. - I think genuinely like pork is the best for like Christmas. I know it's turkey's the traditional and chicken's like the backup, but I think- - I mean, we never did turkey at home.

- Really? I think a good fucking ham is just like, can't beat that shit. - Define what you mean by ham. Do you mean like roast pork or like ham? - We did like a leg of ham. - You can do either. - 'Cause I don't really like ham.

- Does this sound like anything? Does this fucking man like anything? - I don't know like- - What's wrong with it? - Are you talking like, kind of like a gammon steak? Kind of like that kind of thing? - Yeah, it could be. - Because I'm like not a fan of gammon. That's just like the inferior part of bacon. - This man's not a fan of anything. - It is literally the opposite. It is literally the more expensive bacon. That's literally what a gammon is. - I've never heard, what is a gammon? - Gammon's like a way more like a meatier cut of the pig. And it's normally more expensive than bacon.

'Cause bacon is the cheapest part of the pig. - Right, right, right, right. - And it's shit. And gammon's like the actual meat. - Bacon's the best part of the pig. Thank you very much. - You've been fucking brainwashed Garnt. Like you think that bacon's the best. - How are you gonna argue with me that bacon is not the best part of the pig? - It's the most overrated part of the pig. That's for sure. - No, no, no, no. - We never used to eat bacon. Bacon used to be like the shitty part. - I literally know vegetarians who have been converted to meat eaters because of bacon.

- I think it's just the, it's the meme, right? Everyone says bacon is like the best food. - It's because Americans put bacon with everything. It's 'cause the smell of bacon, there is nothing that can like match the smell of bacon. - I just think bacon is like, it's not that great. Like it just kind of tastes okay. - Just give me like a nice piece of pork or ham. - Especially the American bacon. - What the fuck are you talking about? - American bacon is-

- American bacon is the best bacon. - Oh, it's fucking awful. - It's the best bacon. - Fuck off. - It's awful, man. - Stop clapping, Maley. - British back bacon is like the worst bacon. - It's the best way to have bacon.

- No, I just don't have bacon period. - Because right? Normal bacon is like 50 to 70% like the American ones, like fat. It's more fat than- - Yeah, I'm not saying it's healthy, but I'm saying it tastes fucking great. - Fat doesn't taste good. Like fat inherently just tastes like shit. Like the meat is the best part. - No, no, no, no, no. - There's a reason why it's more expensive. - The one thing I don't like about bacon is that it is way too overpowering, especially when you put it with other things.

Like if you have like, say like you put bacon on a burger for instance, a lot of people love that shit, right? But for me, when bacon is on a burger, all I taste is the fucking bacon. I'd rather just replace everything with bacon and it'll taste the same. - It's like the nice condiment that you need. - No, fuck off. - I like bacon in my burger because I don't need any ketchup or mayo or fucking-

- You want no sauce whatsoever on your burger? - No. - You're a fucking clown, bro. I actually like- - That's probably why he likes turkey as well, 'cause it's like the driest fucking burger he'll ever have. - It is, it is. - This man's like, "Water this, water that. I want my bacon to be all fat. Just give me the fucking fat." - Give me the driest fucking burger and non-tap water, please. - No, shh. - Give me literally- - Streaky bacon is like far and beyond the better bacon. - What the fuck's streaky bacon? - Streaky bacon's the American bacon.

So like, I didn't know how, like, 'cause whenever I went- - To Americans, British bacon is similar to Canadian. That's the way they say it. - Yeah, to America, British bacon is just like ham. - So British bacon is more like, it's like 80 to 90% bacon. And it's like 10% fat on the edge.

- It's like a thicker part too, right? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And like as a kid, I would hate British bacon because I would just like eat the bacon parts first and then like save all the fatty part for later 'cause that was the best tasting part. - Was usually fat on its own. You're actually disgusting. - No, no, no, 'cause it wasn't the fat part. It was the fat with like the little piece of meat in there.

And then I realized that American bacon is just all that. See, American bacon is just like the best part of the bacon. - We actually had a podcast where you were arguing about food and then you sit here and tell me you just want to eat fat. You just want fat?

And I'm just gonna give a fuck about your food opinions. - And this man doesn't eat the crust on a pizza, right? It's like the fatty part of a bacon is literally the equivalent of how you've labeled crust on a pizza. - No, it's the fucking opposite because the crust in the pizza tastes like nothing. And the most tastiest part of the bacon is the fatty part. That's why Americans have figured out the best tasting part of the bacon because they've just taken the streaky bacon, which is,

the most tastiest part and put it all in one. Put it all in one. - We've lost this man. - You're beyond saving. - Because if it's just the bacon part, like I've talked about this, the bacon part is just to me like pork is just vanilla beef. We've talked about this. And like the only part that's better is the fatty part of the pork. Like pork belly, pork belly tastes fucking great and that's mostly fat.

- Okay, I admit pork belly's fucking bomb. - Yeah, that's because it's cooked differently. - Yeah, and it's also not a very like cheap part. Bacon isn't handling the shit. - That's an expensive part of the pork. - No, it's because of the fat. It's because of the fatty content. That's what gives it the flavor. - Yeah, but if you just eat the pork- - Because pork by itself, I think it's a shit flavor. - You can get pork belly with more meat added. So you can get chunks where you get a bit like half meat and half fat, right? But that's like an actual like richness to it 'cause it's chunky.

It's like an actual block. - I just don't fuck with the taste of bacon. - And normally pork belly is not on its own. It's normally included with other things. - Yeah, it's with something. - It's in a broth or something. - Whereas bacon, you can have it with other things, but again, it just overpowers everything. - No one makes a fucking broth out of bacon.

Like that's just disgusting 'cause it's shit. - Someone in America is like, "I'm excusing." Someone try that out please. - When we spoke about the food episode and we got really heated, the day or two after, Joey was like, "You know what, I think you're right about pork." - Yeah, no, I thought about it 'cause in the food episode, I agreed with Garnt and said like, "Oh, beef is like the best, is better than pork." But then I thought I'm like,

- No, wait. - You can do so much with pork. - Tonkatsu, katsudon, that's all pork. - Beef, all you can do with beef is have a steak. It's so shit. Like maybe you can make a burger out of the beef. It's literally so limited. Pork, every single amazing dish you can think about that normally has meat is normally pork broth, pork something. - I'm gonna jump over to the other side of the fence here and say pork. - Oh my God, I can't believe.

- The fact that you say that you like streaky bacon over like actual meat just says the reason why you can't appreciate good meat. - To me, pork just tastes like well done beef.

- And as we all know, nobody fucking likes well done beef. - Did this man just say that? - Well done beef? - Did this man just say that? - I'm getting a call right now, it's from the circus. They want to know your address, bro. Like what the? - What? - You're not a clown, you're the entire circus. - It tastes nothing like beef, what are you on about? - 'Cause the fucking best part of beef is like the moisture and like it's...

- Next you'll be saying, oh, duck is just a fatty chicken. That's all it is, man. It's like, it's the same thing, right? - How can you say that? That's they're not even remotely similar in taste. - Oh my God.

- I've never ever, the consistency of the bite is totally different too Garnt. - Every chef who was watching this episode just had a stroke. - Anyone who was in your corner probably realizes how much of a fucking clown you are Garnt. - Nah, nah, I'm sticking my call out. Beef is superior to pork. Except for bacon, bacon is the most superior part of pork. I will fuck with bacon every day of my life. - Garnt's out here literally arguing his fucking like kiddie meal preferences and food.

- Pretending he's at the gourmet table. Like get out of here, come on, come on. Get the fuck out of here. - Oh my God. Anyway, going back to Christmas meals. - Going back to Christmas meals. - I used to fucking hate Christmas meals 'cause my parents used to make, and they honestly, they probably still do, fucking awful gravy. It's like jelly. - Ew. - Yeah. - I feel like Christmas meals live and die by the quality of gravy. - It's true because I,

- I used to eat all of the components on their own because I refuse to eat my parents' gravy and the whole family was like, "What's wrong Connor? Why are you doing it? It tastes good, what do you mean?" I'm like, "No, the KFC gravy, although not great, tastes better than this shit. It's the consistency. Anything that's jelly, I don't like."

- There's like a perfect middle, right? 'Cause if it's too jelly, it's basically like a solid. - It should be thick. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - But like, if it's like, I've had liquidy gravy as well. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh, watery gravy is the fucking worst. - It's the fucking, there's nothing more depressing than watery gravy. - You know, right? When you pour that shit in, if it splashes, it's too, like it needs to like mold, but not be like jelly. Like, I'm calling you out, mom. - Okay, question then for you guys. Do you guys like eggnog?

I've never had eggnog. - I have tried it once, I am not a fan of eggnog. - We don't have eggnog, Maylene just turned around and discovered. - Wait, Maylene, do you like eggnog? - Japanese eggnog. - They have eggnog. - Maylene just simps for eggs, so her opinion is down. - She said Japanese eggnog. - Okay, I never used to like eggnog, but then like two Christmases ago when I went home, my aunt like handmade eggnog. And you have that with like a- - That doesn't sound good. - It's like, do you like custard?

- It's okay. - It's basically, think of custard, but it's a drink. - Oh God. - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then my friend introduced me to eggnog with Fireball. And usually I don't fuck with Fireball. I think Fireball is overrated as fuck, but that with eggnog is like,

- It's so good. I don't know. - I only like custard with like apple pie or something, right? Something like- - Well, you can have an apple pie and drink eggnog. - But I think custard on its own doesn't sound good. I like it with a solid to like help. - That's why you have it with the Christmas meal. - Oh, Jesus Christ.

- I've been trying to find eggnog in Japan 'cause I fucking love that shit. - I do not. It just doesn't sound good. Like it doesn't sound good. I'll try it. - That's the thing though. Like the word eggnog is the least like appealing sounding word. - It sounds like a dirty porn. - Eggnog nine, my favorite porn. - It just sounds gross.

- I don't know. I just, I feel like, 'cause my family's like mega British. So I don't have, Christmas meals to me have been like the same for like a fucking, as probably as they were a thousand years ago. Just people awkwardly sitting around a table being like, "Yes, did you like your presents?" I did like my presents, mother. "Should we open a cracker?" Do you have crackers in Australia? The Christmas crackers? - I thought you meant like white people. Like, yeah, I know.

- I know you have white people in Australia. - We have many crackers in Australia. - They're just British people with attitude. - Basically. - You mean like on a cheese platter and stuff like that? - No, no, no, the ones you pull. - Oh, those crackers. - Yeah, Christmas crackers. - I thought you meant like biscuits. - No, no.

- Oh yeah. - Like Christmas crackers. - Yeah, with the ones with like the little gifts and stuff inside. - Wait, Maylene, do you have those in America? The Christmas crackers that you pull? - Is that part of the American- - Yeah, we have that. - You both pull an end of this cracker. - Yeah. - Yeah, and then whoever gets the bigger half gets the shit inside, right? - Do you have this? - It's like a Kinder Egg. It's like a Kinder Egg, but like as a Christmas- - But you pop it open and then there's little things that like little plastic toys inside. - And there's always like one really shit joke. - Yeah. - And you have like- - And a paper crown.

- There's always a paper crown. - America doesn't have this, huh? - Oh my God. - No, America doesn't have that. - Uncultured. - You'd pull one of those, they're overpriced. They're like $10 for a pack of 10 and it's shit. - And it's over in like 30 seconds. - When you're like five, you're like, this is fucking amazing. This is like Death Note levels of mind games. - I got six crowns. - But then you realize they're rigged in one end. And then when you start cheating, you realize that because

when you're the one who's supposed to lose and you just grab the whole thing and then they pull and you realize it's not happening. You're like, fuck, I've been caught out here. I've cheated. - Okay, do you guys have, you guys have advent calendars, right? - Yeah. - Apparently in America, it's not a thing.

- Is it not? - No, I heard in some parts, in a lot of parts of America, advent calendars are not a thing. - I hated them. - Yeah, I never got them. I never got them either. - I don't like the idea of being teased for like 25 days on chocolate. Just give me the whole fucking- - It's like, it's not even a book.

- Like it's such a small amount. - To me like advent, to explain advent calendars for anyone who doesn't know. So you get a calendar at the beginning of December and every day you can open up like a day of the week and you get a different piece of chocolate. - God, those white people are so funny. - And like as a kid,

- As a kid, I was just like, this is, as a kid, it was just like the equivalent of no nut November, but just with chocolate. You know what I mean? - It is the most blue balls of man, like Christmas. - Okay, also, when do you decide to eat the chocolate? Is it in the morning thing or is it an evening thing? - To me, I always thought it was the morning thing. - I thought it was the morning. - First thing in the morning, you get, it was like, as a kid, it was the only time you could eat chocolate, the first thing in the morning. - It was, but it always like threw off my vibe, right? 'Cause I was like, why am I fucking eating chocolate in the morning?

- I don't know why it's a thing in Australia 'cause Christmas for us is in like the middle of the summer. You buy it and it's just like, you can see the chocolate kind of melting from like inside the thing. You just open it, it's like, ugh.

- Did you guys have like the expensive ones or like the wooden ones? - My parents would never fucking buy me the expensive ones. - Wooden advent calendars? - The traditional advent calendars I've seen is like, it's like a wooden thing. And then you open this like wooden door to like open the chocolate. - My mom like refused to pay more than like a dollar for mine. So she would always wait until like December 4th to get it.

- I remember being like, okay mom. - Three days of expired chocolate. - Yeah, mom, I see you. I see what you're doing here. - I don't know if it's like a mental thing, but for some reason to me, advent calendar chocolate just tasted better. And I don't know why. Like I have exactly the same opinions about Easter egg chocolates.

I have no idea why, you know, why it's because it's the same Cadbury's chocolate. As soon as you put it in egg format, it tastes 10 times better to me. I don't know why. - It's all placebo. - Am I the only one? - It's placebo. - I used to agree because I had an advent calendar like three years ago and I was like, oh fantastic. I'm gonna be a kid again. 'Cause I had one in like three years.

And I ate it and I'm like, wow, this is just shit. Like this is shit. And so I just ate it all in one go. I put them all out on like December 5th. I grabbed them all out, put them in my hand. - Did you guys have the ones where you're like, you kind of like, it like cracks out like a medicine. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - But it's okay. Getting back to Easter chocolate, right?

- I think it's 'cause you're a kid. Because I, you know when you're a kid, right? Did they have these in Australia where they had, so in the UK they have the standard like $1, $2 eggs. - Yeah. - Which is an egg, maybe you get a chocolate bar as well. - Yeah. - But when you were a kid, you'd always see the big egg. - Yeah. - I'm talking like the, like $30, $40 egg that was like giant. I feel like the magic is lost when you know you can buy it. Because my parents were,

My parents were never gonna buy me the $30. They would never buy me more than one egg. So like, you don't need more than that. That's ridiculous. And so when I was like two years ago, I bought the big egg, but it was reduced for like 10 bucks. And I had it thinking it was gonna be fucking like God tier experience, came with its own shitty mug and two chocolate bars. It was just fucking shitty chocolate.

It was just, it was awful. I was like, wow. - I'm the opposite. - And then I realized when I put all this chocolate down, it was like 300 grams of chocolate. And I could have bought like- - Yeah, because the inside's hollow, right? - Because I could have bought like five times the amount of chocolate than what I paid. We're fucking paying out the ass for them to put it in a fucking mold and just fucking sear it together. Are you kidding me? - 'Cause the thing is, logically, my mind knows this.

but every time it's Easter, like even as an adult, like now that I am an adult, I just buy one, I eat it on the same day, which is something I could never do before. And then the next day I'm in my local Tesco's or something, I'm like, I could go for another Easter egg. I can do it.

- And the thing is, I always buy like the Cadbury's ones. So they always have like the chocolate. So it's always like Cadbury's buttons or something. And I know like I can taste that it's exactly the same chocolate. I don't know, something about Easter eggs. It's just like the right thickness. It's just something about eating an Easter egg that just makes you feel like a king. - I actually prefer the ones that were like shaped out like a rabbit.

- Yeah, those are pretty good. - Yeah, those are good as well. - What is it, like the Lindt one to Lenoir? Those ones are like thick as well. Have you had those? - Maybe it's not just Easter egg, something about eating hollow chocolates that just hit different in my mind. I don't know why. - Don't know about that one, chief. - I don't know what is wrong with my psychology to be like chocolate bar, get that shit away. Hollow chocolate, ooh, okay. Let me nibble on this. - I'm curious, do you have a worst or best Christmas present you've ever received?

- Oh God, the best one I received, I feel like the younger you were, the better your Christmas presents turned out. - 100% dude, back when I could like,

just get like a bunch of shitty toys that lasted 10 minutes. I was like, what? - The probably best Christmas gift I ever got was I got a Game Boy Advance. - Oh shit. - Yeah, when I was like five and I played like the shitty like Kirby port that was like the SNES game, which I found out ages ago, it was like $5 game. I was just like, this is amazing father, thank you. - Probably the best present I've ever got was an N64. And I think it was more the experience around it because

So I was at my cousin's house and I opened it. Like, remember when game consoles were like the God's here of anything you could ever get? - Like no gift could compare. - You know your parents loved you when they got you a game console. It's like, I feel truly loved. Thank you mother and father. - I remember my parents got me when I was, I don't know when that came out.

Do you remember when the Wii was like impossible to get? - Yeah. - Like 2005 or something. - And it was just impossible to get. Well, they were like all sold out in the UK, but my dad worked in Germany for like most of my life. So when he came back for Christmas, he brought me it and I was like, "Oh my, holy fuck, how did you get a Wii?" And then as we went to plug it in on Christmas day, couldn't fucking plug it in 'cause he had the German plug.

And then, 'cause my dad obviously just forgot to buy one. And I remember booting it up and it being like, "Achtung!" And the thing like control, "Warning!" I was like, "Whoa!" 'Cause I think warning or attention is just, it's like, "Achtung!" or something. I'm like, "What is this, dad? Dad, dad help me. My dad can't fucking speak German." So he was like, "I don't know, son. What are we doing? I don't know."

I fucking had Wii Sports, but like, and some other games. - Wii Sports. - I had some game and the title was German. I remember just, I was like so fucking confused as a kid. I was like, what the fuck is this? - I think I got the Wii for Christmas as well actually now that I think about it. - Shit was wrong, man. - Yeah. - But you know what ended up happening? Because it was when Wii Sports was like insane. The day we got up working, which is next day, Wii Sports, I couldn't fucking play it 'cause all my fucking like older relatives were playing

like we bowling drunk. I'm like, when am I gonna play Zelda? What the fuck? This is my gift, what the fuck? - No, 'cause I just remember one of my best memories of the N64 was just the first time I boost up Goldeneye with my cousins. And it was, I think that was my first proper like multiplayer experience. 'Cause I'm like, whoa, four people can play at the same time and we can play together.

And at that time, like that was fucking mind blowing. 'Cause the best poor play game back then was probably like fucking Bomberman or something like that. - Mario Party maybe? - No, because Mario Party wasn't out then. - Oh, was it not? - No, okay. - 'Cause the first one was on N64. - Yeah, it was 264. - And I remember we stayed up till like 4:00 AM, which back when I was a kid was like,

- I might as well, it's like not sleeping for two days. - Yeah, it might as well have been up for 48 hours. - But if you get a brand new game console, man, those endorphins are firing off, man. - Oh yeah, of course. - Oh my God, dude. I don't really get that anymore. - 'Cause you can afford everything now. - Yeah, I guess so, right? - It's like doing a pint of cocaine. - Like seeing the PS5, I'm like, I know if I get it, I'll play like Demon's Souls and be like, yeah, I mean, sure. 'Cause the jump isn't that significant anymore. - PS4 games can load 20% faster now. - Cool, epic, man.

Oh wow, really excited. - Going from like a SNES to an N64 is like, whoa, 3D. You fucking kidding me? I can walk in any direction? What? - Up is forward.

- What is this analog stick? - Oh my God. The cancer that is the fucking N64 controller. I look at that thing now and I'm just like, how did anyone think this was a good idea? - I love picking it up still and being like, God damn you ugly son of a bitch. I love you. - I feel it again and I put my thumb on like the analog stick and I'm just like, how is it this fucking hot?

Like this is designed to give blistered. How did this pass the ergonomics test? - Yeah, the moment I like put my thumb on the joystick, my palm just starts to hurt. I'm just like the memories of blistered palms doing fucking this on Mario Party 2. - Yeah, you could get gloves from Nintendo. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - 'Cause they lost a lawsuit because of Mario Party 1, 'cause of the arm injury.

- Oh yeah, my palm got destroyed in Mario Party 1. - I could believe that, that's insane. - I just assumed like the design team at Nintendo, the first day on the job, they just took like an ergonomics book and just set on fire. It's like, okay, we're designing the N64 controller now guys. - Is it fun? Put it in. Man, I remember as well that same Christmas when we got the Wii, my older brother got like, not the Death Star, what's the other big battleship in Star Wars? The one that's like a fucking like that.

- Oh, the- - Destroyer or something. - Yeah, something like that, I don't know. - And then he built it all and for some reason had the amazing idea to put it near the TV in front of where we were with the Wii. And I'm sure you can imagine what happened. - Oh yeah. - Fucking hit the roof. Someone did the bowling, threw it, slammed the roof, smashed down and destroyed this thing that he'd spent like eight hours building. It was so funny.

- I'll never forget that shit. - Watching my dad playing Wii Sports is probably the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life because like- - Boomers get so into it. - Oh dude, like he was so into fucking Wii boxing as well. It's like of all the Wii Sports ones, it was the fucking most intense one. And oh my God, just watching my dad just fucking doing this for like two hours, it's just so funny.

- Man, I remember one Christmas, I don't know how old I was. So I was in Sunday school and I fucking hated Sunday school. 'Cause why the fuck would I wanna go to like, to me as well, when you're like eight, I didn't understand why I cared about, why I should care about Jesus and shit. To me, I was like, who is this guy and why do I care? - Right. - Or, or, who is this guy? Who's man? Who's the big J man that everyone keeps talking about, man?

I remember this, I fucking hated it. My parents for some reason, 'cause my parents, right? Not to out my parents here, right? But they said they were religious. My parents are fucking religious. They just wanted to be religious. It's literally like, I feel like the white suburban family. It's like, yeah, we believe in Jesus. - Yeah, we love J-Man. - Yeah, we love him, man. We're all, you know, whatever. And I'm like, we don't.

- You know, I asked my mom and dad was last time when they went to church and it's like, hmm, how many decades? - 1972. - Right, so they put me, they had the genius idea to put all of me and my brothers in Sunday school. And my older brother, he never complains about stuff. He just gets on with it. And me, you know me, I like to complain. - Okay, before we get into your story, what is Sunday school?

- Oh, do you not know? Okay, true. - It's like a church school, right? - So yeah, it's like, I mean, it's in America as well. I think it's more popular in America, but in the UK as well, it's normally for like Christian stuff or Catholic or whatever. - What'd you learn in Sunday school? 'Cause I've never been to Sunday school. - I remember, Jesus. - I just know about Sunday school. - So I think I was too young to do like the super religious stuff. So 90% of the time they just spoke about like religious, they would tell stories and I remember being like, who the fuck cares?

And also I remember coloring in so many pictures, so many fucking pictures. - Did you have like a Jesus coloring book? - Yeah, we had like a Jesus coloring page and I fucking hated it. I was like, who is this guy? Why do I care? - Why am I coloring this guy in? - This is the fifth time we've colored in his birth. Do we really need to keep coloring this in? I do remember being like, and also one time and it was, you know, I'd watch TV shows, you know, American cartoons and they have like the paddling balls

And I have this very, very vivid memory of one time one of the kids bringing in the paddling balls and it was like the coolest fucking thing ever. And they immediately took it away from him. And I was like, no, I wanna play with the paddling ball. - Why did they take it away from him? - I don't know, 'cause it's Jesus time. - No one interrupts Jesus time. - And they made us do like a play at Christmas when I was like eight or nine. - Oh, well, like the birth of Jesus and stuff? - Yeah, yeah. - I think my school did that as well. - Yeah, but it wasn't school though. We had to do it fucking Sunday school. - What role did you get? - I had to give myrrh.

And I remember being like, "Mom, I don't know-" - You were one of the wise men? - Yeah, yeah, I was one of the wise men. - Oh man, you got a big role. I was the snowman. - That was literally what I did. I literally just did this on stage. And then my mom still has pictures being like,

- Great performance, great performance. - I think I was one of the wise men only because there wasn't enough kids to fill the other roles. Because there wasn't enough kids in the school. I hated it, I remember. And then also I was like, why do I have to have my mom? He's got gold. I want gold, that's bullshit. And I didn't know how to say myrrh at the time when I was a kid. - Why did you say? - Myrrh, myrrh, myrrh. - Gold, I know gold, mother. Come on, give me it.

And I remember we had to do this shitty play and I was like, I hate this so much. I hate it. And so for one Christmas I asked my mom, I was like, she was like, what do you want for Christmas? - Murr. - I dead ass looked her in the eyes and I was like, I don't care about gifts. Just please don't make me go to Sunday school. I want my Sundays back.

I'm going to school five days a week and then another day I have to turn up and fucking color pictures of Jesus. Are you kidding me? I hate this shit. And I think honestly, that's the reason why I just care for like zero religion now because they pushed it so heavily on me and I'm like, this is shit. It's all a bunch of nonsense. We're reading book stories about this dude who I don't give a fuck about. Like there's no- - So you went to a Catholic school as well? - No, it wasn't a Catholic school but they did make us pray three times a day. - Wait, so-

- So in Wales, like a lot of schools should make you pray. 'Cause it's just like a religious country. - Even if it's like an atheist school. - There's no atheist school. It's just like, it's a school. And a lot of them have like- - It's just a school. - In my secondary school and my primary school, I think you pray three times a day. - Oh wow, really? - But the thing is, right, that you realize maybe like in high school, you're like, oh,

they won't tell you off if you don't pray. 'Cause they can't, 'cause it's a religious thing. - But it's still like a school rule? - Well, no, it's- - Or like a school suggestion? - It's like a cult, right? Because when you get in this thing, right? You go to school and then everyone suddenly bows their head and starts fucking speaking in tongues. You're like, "Oh shit, okay, I should probably join in on this. I don't wanna be the only one left out." But then you realize after on, oh,

they're not gonna do anything if I don't pray and just stand there and look around and be like, "What's going on?" You see all the other kids. And so I would just refuse to do it eventually. 'Cause I'm like, "I'm not praying. "I don't believe in this nonsense." I don't understand why they made us do it. 'Cause we weren't a religious school. - That's the thing. It's like, I find that a bit weird. 'Cause it would make sense if you went to like a Christian school or Catholic school. - It might've been like,

it wasn't officially a Christian school, but I think a lot of the schools in Wales were like Christian-esque or something. - I think just a lot of schools in England are like that anyway, because I don't think I went to a Catholic or religious school, but we still had to like, we still did religious things around Christmas time.

And I had no idea what the fuck was going on. - Yeah, fuck. - 'Cause like, I come from a Buddhist family. So we'd have events in the church and stuff like this. I'm like, what? This isn't a temple. What is this? - God, we have to sing like Welsh hymns. And they're the fucking worst thing. - I had to sing hymns as well. I had no idea what they meant. - No, me neither. There was one and it was called like, "Dordawn mhen" and it means, "Come on my head."

- J-Man, please. - I know it's your birthday and all, but fucking hell. - It's literally called like, "Do, dav, and hen," right? Which literally translates to come on my head. So every time they would like, 'cause there was a sheet of 12 hymns and they would never do, "Do, dav, and hen," because everyone would always like look at each other and giggle. And because like the chorus was just shouting like loudly,

♪ Lord of the men ♪ - They would never pick it 'cause everyone would just start screaming, "Come on my head" in Welsh because they found it, 'cause we're all fucking kids and we found it funny. And every time they'd pick it, it was like a fucking event because it was the one time where all the kids who didn't really sing would proudly sing it. - We'd be like, "All right, boys in queue, right?"

- That's weird because like I went to, my high school was like a Catholic school, even though I'm not Catholic personally, but like we didn't even have to do like the whole like praying thing. Like we would have to do, you know, maybe like a, like a, like an end of term mass or like a beginning of term mass and stuff like that to like bring on the new year. But yeah, we never had to do any- - I did, it was one of those things that when you left, you're like,

That was weird, wasn't it? That was weird that they made us pray. We would like pray before every meal and stuff like a full on like- - That's a bit weird. - Yeah, it is weird. What's up with that Wales, man? Come on. And eventually my parents did grant my Christmas wish

- Oh really? - Oh really. - Got you out of there? - At what age? - Fuck, it was before I started secondary school. So it must've been- - How long were you in there for? - I think like two or three years. - Jeez. - I fucking hate it. - Makes it sound like a prison. - How long were you in there for? - How long were you in? - Oh, have you readjusted to society now? - The amount of times I was like, "Mom, I cannot, I know you think that it's just me being a fucking kid, but I fucking hate this. Please, please."

Please take me out of this. - Honestly, as a kid, like anything religious was just the most boring thing for me. Like I remember whenever my mom would take me to temples and everything to go like pray and like talk to the monk and everything. Like I just wanted to go home and play N64, honestly. Like I'm just like this, what's fun to do here? There is literally nothing fun to do here in this religious place. - This is why like when you see like those families who like their kids just get like indoctrinated into the indoctrination.

raised into the, I think it's indoctrinated. - Indoctrinated. - I think so. - Call out to anyone who's religious. - Like they're super religious people, right? 'Cause I remember even when I was like eight and I would hear these things like, he turned wine into water. And I remember being like eight years old, like did he though?

I've never seen anyone do that. - Actually. - But I remember being like, that sounds a bit bullshit to me. - Press X to tell. - Yeah, I do remember vividly being like, yeah, I don't know about that. - Pixar didn't have it. - Yeah, yeah. Same thing with Santa Claus. Like my parents would try and tell me at like age 10 that Santa was real. I'm like, I'm not having any of that. Come on, come on.

Come on, reindeers that can fly? Come on, man. - That's the question. At what age did you figure out that, spoilers alert, Santa isn't real. - Oh dude, I went on an operation at midnight to find out.

- You did like the stealth mission? - To prove to them that I knew what they were doing. And I found out. - I found out accidentally because I think I was maybe like 10 or 11 and it was Christmas night and I was like, fuck, I really need a pee. I drank too much whatever it was. And I got up in the middle of the night. My dad was like this next to the tree and he just caught me right hand and he's like,

"All right, son, it's time you found out." - It's time you knew the truth. - You got me, kid. - I think I know where, because I did like a thorough sweep of the house. But a few days before I'm like, "There'll be presents here." My theory is correct, my hypothesis. Couldn't find any presents in the house and I was like, "Hmm, they must be hidden in the garage."

So I was like, all right, I'll wait till midnight on Christmas until they bring them in. And as I slept, right? It was like covert ops, just pretending to sleep. My parents came in to check if I was sleeping and I wasn't. - So I don't remember the exact age I found out like Santa wasn't real, but I remember as a kid, I was like the,

smartest dumb kids in existence because I would like be figuring out all these like logistics of how Santa could be able to send these presents round. 'Cause there would be years where, you know, I wouldn't be at home. So I'd be like, how's Santa gonna figure out I ain't home? - You'd be that Santa. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So like we'd be staying at my cousin's house, right?

and the presents would still be there even though we were staying at my cousin's house, no matter where we were every year. And for some reason it just didn't click to me as a kid that Santa wasn't real, but-

but like instead of just realizing that Santa wasn't real, I was in my head, I was like, yo, so this is how Santa knew I was staying here. So we went to our house, didn't see I was there, saw like the notes that I left somewhere or saw like the phone call that I had with my cousin that we were coming around to his house. So that's how Santa knew that I was staying around my cousin's house.

- I explained this to my parents at the time. And my parents were just like, "Yeah, yeah, you figured it out. You figured it out. You've outsmarted Santa." - Goddammit, he's smart. - You have like the whiteboard with like the pins on it. It's just like, "Does he operate by time zones? Like how does it work?" Yeah. Oh, fucking hell. - I think I just remember being like, "Damn, none of this Jesus stuff seemed to have happened." Like when I was 10, I was like, "I don't know if this Santa stuff's real 'cause none of this other shit's happening. I wanna try wine."

- Did you ever do like that? I think it's just like an American thing, but did you ever leave like the cookies and milk? - No, yeah, we did milk. - Oh really? - Yeah. - We didn't do that. - Yeah, I didn't do that. - Yeah. - I think so my dad just wanted food. - I saw this brilliant Reddit post of like a dad being like, "So my son's left cookies and milk on his bedside table, but how do I tell him that Santa is lactose intolerant?"

It's like, do I just drink the milk and take the shits for my son? Or do I leave it there and break his heart? - I remember one time my dad was like, "No, no, no, no, Connor, Santa likes beer."

- I'm definitely doing that to my child. - So he legit poured beer for himself and then just drank it obviously, 'cause he just poured a cold one for himself. - I'm just gonna be to my side, I'm like, did you know that Santa loves gin and tonic? - Santa likes an espresso martini. - Leave a gin and tonic and maybe a cheese platter on there. I mean, Santa will definitely eat that. - A double of course.

- Double shot. - Santa doesn't like cookies, he likes brownies, but like the special brownies. - Yeah, the special brownies. - Give Santa the special kind of brownies. - Yeah, special brownies. - Santa loves G Fuel. Just put a cup of G Fuel next to your brain. - I can't believe your dad dead ass said that to you. - Dude, that is so big brain. - That is big brain as fuck.

'Cause he knows that we'd believe it. Like I believed that it wasn't real, but I also was like, maybe a little bit, there's a chance that someone's drinking this. - Well, I mean, Santa is a grown adult. You know, he might, he's working hard on Christmas. - He should be driving and drinking, but I mean, that's okay. - So like,

- Question to you guys, do you normally have like a normal, like what's your Christmas day like? What's your typical Christmas day like? Do you have any schedules? Do you have any like- - Used to have, you know, you'd open presents first thing, which is always the best part. Pretty much goes downhill from there.

- Do you remember the age where you just couldn't sleep before Christmas? And then as a teenager, you're just like, dude, like I don't care about this anymore. - You realize when you were like, I don't know, did you always used to pick a lot of things and you would get some of them or did you get everything that you picked? - I would get some of them. - Because my parents would also be like, listen Connor, Santa's got a budget.

And I was like, really? So then I had to like look for the product within the budget. - Right, right. - And then I never connected the dots, you know, from age eight or whatever. But I would go through like, we had a thing called like Argos. - Yeah, Argos. - What's that? - It's like a, they had like a giant, like fucking gigantic booklet. - Imagine the most depressing store you can think of. You go into this store, right? And it's not a store. It's just a store of catalogs.

- So imagine like Amazon, imagine if Amazon, imagine the Amazon warehouse, but it had a store for us. - Like an Amazon IRL. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So you would go and you could book it online or back then you had to go to the store and tick off the boxes you wanted according to like the catalog. - Sounds depressing as fuck. - Yeah, it was. - Because the catalog. - As a kid though, this shit was magical.

'Cause it had like everything in it. And so you would go through and, you know, adult now you realize this was just fucking overpriced. All the shit was, but you know, back then there was no Amazon. So you were like fitting it in the budget. - Yeah, because how you go through it is 'cause back in the day you didn't have like, you didn't really have the internet. So you'd have to order off this catalog. So you'd go into this Argos store and there was this catalog that was like as thick as a brick. You could fucking murder someone with this catalog, right? So you'd go in and you'd flip to like the index. So you'd go in and you'd just be like,

- And so you'd flip through the index and go through like the game sections and the toy sections, which was the only sections you really looked at. And then it was just like free pickings basically. - I never had anything like that. - And then basically like, when I turned up Christmas morning, there'd probably be a few surprises, but most of the stuff that I wanted would be there.

Except that one time, like I said, the car upset, fucking dad bought me cricket tickets. Clearly express my disdain for cricket. But I thought, I thought this is going to change. - I genuinely like other than the Gameboy advance, I genuinely don't remember what else I got as a, as a, from like from Santa. - One Christmas I just got like all Yu-Gi-Oh.

- Oh yeah. - I got the fucking tool arm thing. - Oh, you got one of those? - Yeah, yeah, I got one. All my friends have got one as well. - Jealous. - We would turn up to school and we would play Yu-Gi-Oh, but then they just stopped playing after they realized my deck was- - I guess Santa didn't have the budget for that for me. I feel like I asked for a one year, but I just didn't get it. - I mean, your dad was like, "Fuck this little shit, he doesn't need that." - Yeah, I think he just got me a bunch of booster packs.

- He has the graveyard and the fold out thing in the back of the booster packs, he'll be fine. - Yeah, he'll be all right. - I remember for me, it was always video games. I never asked for anything but video games. And that was because as a kid, there were only two times in the year when I could get new video games. And one of them was my birthday and the other one was Christmas. - Yeah, it was a fucking rare occasion if I managed to get a game outside of my birthday or Christmas. - Yeah, exactly. So I remember it was like the highlight of my year. 'Cause I'd be like,

Finally, I can play something other than Super Mario 64 for like the millionth time. And so I couldn't get every game. So I'd normally get like two. If it was like a fucking special year, it was like, I knew my parents loved me when I got three video games. - Yeah, three games was like the limit for me as well. It's like a hundred quid, 120 pounds. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - We're pushing it.

- Yeah, so I mean, that's probably why I always remember the N64 'cause the N64 was just like God mode. Like I had never gotten a bigger present in my life at that moment. - Now that you say that, I think I remember why I wanted to, like why I kept doing like chess stuff and being good at things because my parents would buy me shit. If I wanted things, they would buy me stuff. So I was like, I should just win the stuff that I'm good at and then they'll keep buying me things.

'Cause whenever I like win a tournament or whatever, they'd go and buy me a game. And I'm like, "Stonks." Let's just get good at something. - I think that was me, but just with like school and like, especially like Japanese for me. Like if I did well in like my Japanese tests and whatnot, my mom would be like, "Yes, that is my son." - My brother was always better, so it didn't matter. I was like, "I gotta find another niche." - Oh, fair enough, fair enough. Do you have any family traditions at Christmas?

- We just have like family come over and you know. - We have like two parties. We have like one like Christmas Eve, so like 24th the night we would have kind of bring all of our like family friends over. So like all my like childhood friends and whatnot, like friends from school and whatnot come to ours. And then Christmas day, the next day is when it's like family, like cheering the day. - For me it's the other way around. Like family day is like, it's like,

- Completely sober, it's like Christmas day. Boxing day is when the fucking party is at, where we get drunk with the family. - Boxing day is recovery day for us. Boxing day is like, we've had two parties back to back, we've gotta recover. - Just have family come over, I think, and just have a nice little get together. - Yeah, it's nice for us as well because at my parents' place, we have this, because it's during the summer in Australia, we have this big, we have at our place this big backyard deck

that looks over everything. And so like just crack open a cold beer in like the fucking 30 degree summer on a Christmas is fucking awesome. - I keep forgetting that. - That's weird to me. - All we go to my uncle's place and we jump in his pool and we're just in the pool all day on a Christmas day. - It was super weird for me like two, three years ago when I was living in Thailand and we were celebrating Christmas in Thailand and it was just like, yeah, 30 degree heat and us opening Christmas presents under a Christmas tree. And I'm like,

this isn't very Christmasy. - I'm sweating, man. - This isn't feel very Christmasy. I have to put the AC on. It's just not, it's, I mean, okay. Have you ever had a white Christmas? - Yeah. - I've had it once. - I've had it once. - So my family, most of the time, prefer to like go on like vacation.

for Christmas. I think they just love going on vacation. And this is something they always used to do is like, we're not gonna buy you stuff, Con, we're gonna take you places. Which I appreciate now, but as a kid I fucking hated it. I'm like, I don't wanna go to fucking France, mom. I fucking hate France. Everyone in France is a dickhead.

Can you just get me the new game board? - You don't see family on Christmas? - So it depends on, it's like, I think every other year. So we would sometimes go skiing or snowboarding, which sounds fucking epic. - That's pretty much the spark now, yeah. Your family have the right idea, man. They are big brain. - But when I was a kid, I'm like, I don't wanna fucking be away. This is my time off, you're making me do work. 'Cause to me, skiing and snowboarding with my family was like a chore when I was a kid because they're so fucking slow.

I would have to like go on a ski thing and I would just be like, I would wait at the top. - Come on peasants. - I would wait at the top and I'm like, just go ahead. I'll be down, I'll follow you. And I would wait five minutes on my phone. And then when I was like, it's been five minutes, time to go like full speed down and catch up and like overtake them. And I just wait. And then, you know, also when you're a kid and you don't have money, I'm fucking hungry as shit and in these resorts, 'cause like we would go on like packages.

So they were pretty cheap. Not to bash my pants, I'm very grateful, but they were like the cheapest possible way that you could go to like Italy and ski. - Right, right, right. - Which is fair enough. I mean, I applaud the effort, but when you had to eat out at these places, they like charge a lot for like food and drinks. So it was like, we're getting one meal between us all. We're all gonna split it. And I'm like, fuck, mom, I'm starving. I would nut for more than one sixth of a pizza right now.

I'm like, please. But going now as an adult, I have my own money. I'm like, I'll waste all my money on the food there. I don't give a fuck. I want to be full. - No, because like these activities, I've realized the reason we enjoy them so much as an adult. - 'Cause you do with your friends. - Yeah, no, not just that, but because we can get alcohol involved.

- Yeah. - You know what I mean? Like it's just like going on trips and everything. It's just funner with a pint and- - It's like, oh, 9:00 AM, I guess it's time for a pint. - Yeah, 'cause what do you do after you have your fun activity and you just wanna wind down? As a kid, you have fucking nothing to do, but as an adult, you can just get drunk with the-

- The boys and that's- - Yeah, I enjoy spending more time with my family now that I'm an adult than I did when I was a kid. - Yeah, exactly. - 'Cause I've worked at, I've had three white Christmases and all three of them have been because I was working at a ski resort in Japan. - I was about to say, having a white Christmas in Australia. - Oh no, no. - That's a different type of white Christmas if you're gonna be true. But yeah, like I had the whitest Christmases in like ski resorts because it's just fucking white everywhere. But like,

- The only difference between the Christmas night at a ski resort and every other night is that there's just more white people outside really. That's the only difference because like, because what do you do at a ski resort other than skiing and snowboarding? You get shit faced. - Sauna, sauna's normally a good chance. - Yeah, or like onsen, right? But like, other than that, it's like the only other thing, if you wake up in the morning, you're like, oh man, my body's feeling a bit sore. I don't want to go skiing or snowboarding.

- There's nothing to do during the day other than to go to the one bar that's open 24/7 and just get shit for you. - And also because like fucking skiing and snowboarding is so fucking exhausting. - Oh yeah. - You're like, all right, that fucking pint is like amazing. You haven't been skiing or snowboarding. - I've never been skiing or snowboarding. - We will. - I mean like the reason I've never been is just 'cause

I mean, every holiday we went to Thailand. - It's also one of those things where I feel like, I don't know why my family just were like, let's just go skiing for the first time. I feel like normally you go with someone who's been, so they can be like, oh, I'll help you out. - Or do like skiing lessons. - Skiing lessons, yeah. - Yeah, also, when I was growing up, I wasn't in the most privileged position where my family could kind of afford that because I feel like,

going skiing is like an expensive holiday or can be an expensive holiday. - Yeah, it is. - Especially if you're in a country that doesn't have like resorts nearby. - Exactly. - You know what I realized this when I started flying for like conventions and stuff, right? I always thought the airports were even worse than they actually are because right, if you get one of those package deals

the company that does the package deal charters the plane. So you all have to like wait in this fucking horrible line. These planes are like the fucking worst. And the people are the worst as well. It's like the worst kind of British tourist, which I'm sure you've all seen videos of. You watch like airport meltdowns. It's always British people.

- Right, right. - Always. Dude, these fucking flights are awful, man. It's the most, oh God. You been on them? - I've been on, okay, so the most depressing place I've been to on earth, I think, is Luton Airport. - Oh, it's awful. - Or in UK? - In the UK, yeah. Okay, so we stayed, okay, so this, you know, back before, back when I was just like fucking poor and all that stuff, we booked this holiday.

It was me and Sydney at the time. So we booked this holiday on this like budget airline that flew out of Luton. And I remember to save costs, we needed to stay near Luton because it was actually cheaper to stay near Luton than to like get there in the morning in the like rush hour time. - Right, right. - And so we picked the cheapest hotel, which happened to be Easy Hotel.

- Which I didn't know that- - That already sounds sus. - Okay, so in like Europe, there's this budget airline called EasyJet, right? - It's the worst. - And it's the worst. It's one of the worst airlines. I wouldn't say it's the worst. - What's worse, Ryan? - I'd say Ryan. - Ryan is fucking sus. - They're both two sides of the same coin. - Anything that flies out Luton is automatically like horrible for me.

So we stay in easy hotel and I've never felt like I've paid to stay in a prison cell before until I stayed there. So it was like, we go in and there's literally like no windows. - It's just a white room, right? - Yeah, ours is just a black room and like the walls are paper thin and they're like, I could hear at least like three different people fucking in different rooms. You know what I mean? And I go into the shower

- That's a shared shower, right? Or is it- - No, no, no. You had your own private shower, but it was- - Ooh la la. - That's one step up. But there wasn't even a door to separate the shower from the bed. So it was just curtains. So you open up these curtains and then there is a toilet seat and then there is a shower right next to it.

And it just, it was the like definition of how I imagine a prison shower to be right. 'Cause the only thing said that, 'cause there's nothing separating the toilet from the shower. So you just, you're just showering and so while you're showering the toilet's just like getting fucking soaked and everything like that. And it's got like the gray kind of like

kind of like floor as well. So it felt like I was in a prison cell and I had to pay good money. - How much was it for like a night? - I can't remember, like 20 quid a night. - Fucking hell. - I would have rather stayed in a prison cell. It was just like me and Sydney there, but I was like, I better not drop the soap, man.

I better not drop the soap while I'm here. - Something just burst through the fucking walls like, "Yeah!" - It's like Ryanair and EasyJet, if you forget your ticket, they charge you like 50 euros. - I got charged that when we flew from fucking Amsterdam to Ireland. - I got charged that as well. - Did you? - Yeah. - I've never wanted to smack an attendant in my life, but when she said that, I was like,

but my hand is, my back hand is ready. - Yeah, and like if you have like over like five kilograms or something, which is like what you're obviously gonna have over, they charge you like 50 pounds to bring a carry on. It's ridiculous. - So dumb. - It's awful, dad. - 'Cause it's right in this fine print where they tell you you can't check in, right?

And I think that's the big one. I understand, not having like not being able to check in or everything, but like putting it in like the fine print. - That's just a dick move. - Yeah, it is like, what is it? Like asshole designs? That is it. - And they have like a million ads.

before you even get to what you wanna like get to. Like the amount of fucking renter cars they fucking try and show you is up the ass online. - It's like no, no, no. - And also even if the plane is completely empty, they won't let you choose seats and they on purpose scatter you so that they force you to pay to sit next to each other. - Right, right. - But I'm like, fuck that. No, I'm not doing that. Fuck, I don't give a fuck.

I'll see them when I land, who fuck cares? I'm not desperate that I need to be within a two meter radius of my friends all the time. Jesus Christ. - We have something similar in Australia, it's called Jetstar. - Oh God. Every fucking continent has that. - It's so bad. I fucking flew Jetstar once from Sydney to Brisbane and it was like an hour and a half flight, but it was the worst fucking flight I've ever been on. Delayed three hours for no reason.

And then you get there and then it's like 60 million years for the luggage to come out on the other side. I'm just like, where is this luggage? - God, it's like, you've been on Norwegian? You've been on Norwegian, right? - Yeah, I've been on Norwegian. - Fucking hate Norwegian Airlines. - It's all right. - Norwegian's okay. - Oh my God. - Compared to other budget airlines, Norwegian is like the Rolls Royce of budget airlines, man. - No, 'cause it's the only budget airline that's like long haul, I swear. And you can have a 12 hour flight and they will give you no food.

- Really? - Yeah. - On Norwegian? - You have to pay for the air food. - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, but like any budget airline that has movies, that has a movie choice is already like better than 90% of budget airlines. - I think it only has movies because they don't make those planes, the ones that do long haul without them built in. - Yeah, right. - I don't think they do that anymore.

I don't think it's possible. I'm sure if they could have removed the TVs and made you pay for them, I'm sure they would. But like the fact that they can go 12 hours and not give you food like blows my mind. - I've never been on a Norwegian airline that long. - Don't. - Dude, don't. - Yeah. - I mean, I'd say I've been on worse. - And also it's a 12 hour flight, right? And they try and they charge you for like a carry on. - Where the fuck were you flying to? - LA to UK. - UK to LA. - And it's always Norwegian because they're by far the cheapest. - You guys didn't have like American or United or anything?

- Yeah, but they were more like double the price. - Also broke as fuck. So it was like either Norwegian, which was pretty consistently always like 400 bucks return from London to LA. And then the next step was like United, which was like 500. But back then it was like a hundred bucks. I was like, that's a big deal.

a slightly better hotel. - It wasn't 400 to 500. It was like 400 to 600, 700. I think you got what you paid for. I think that Norwegian is good for the price. And if you're like someone broke,

who's trying to go to like AX or something or trying to go to LA for the anime convention. - It's a super good deal. - You just run the risk of dying of starvation. - Every single time I was on the plane, I was fucking hungry. - Just eat a shit ton before you get on, bring a fuck ton of snacks and you'll be good. - You just have to fast. - The first time I didn't know. I didn't know because I saw that you could pay for a meal, but I was like, oh, they'll give you like a snack or something, nothing.

You don't get anything. You get nothing. - Would you like this granola bar for $6? - And like these chairs are the, I don't know how they've, it's like they've engineered these chairs to be fucking God awful. Like at least other airlines have semi-competent chairs, but for some reason on Norwegian airlines, they'd fucking handcrafted this shit to be disgusting and painful. And if you get in the middle row of the four, it's like, just give up on being happy in life for the next 12 hours. And one time I went on it and there was,

I was in the end, the aisle seat of the three. And I was like, okay, well it's not the middle of the four, so I'm happy. And this couple were like making out next to me. And like, I swear they were fingering each other. 'Cause I was like, this is disgusting. Like, I wanna die, please, please. And no amount of like, don't look at the side could like,

"focus me on Game of Thrones season four, "or whatever the fuck I was watching." I was like, "Please, please, please." - Yeah, because it's like, there's the one time you curse that you have a periphery, right? - Yeah, because the one, every time I would take my headphone off just for a second, I could hear like,

- Why? - Tell you what, if you're gonna go on a budget airlines, just pay 300 bucks for a good pair of noise cancelling headphones. Honestly, like that's the best advice I can give you. Don't cheap out on them. - Jesus Christ. - I don't know what it is about the airplane design of seats that are just like ergonomically designed to be the most uncomfortable thing you've ever sat on. - Did you see those standing seats they were trying to make?

- No. - It's like to fit more people in, they're trying to make standing seats for airlines so that like they can fit more people. It's just basically like this. - At this point, what's the difference between that and just being cattle? You know what I mean?

Like we're just literally being herded in. - It obviously was the budget airlines trying to do this. - It's like fucking sardines. - 'Cause they were like, we can fit 20% more passengers in the economy if we do this. - Yeah, but no one wants that. No passenger wants that. - 'Cause their argument or something was that if it's a two hour flight, you can stand for two hours.

- No, I don't want to. - No, no, no, no, it's terrible. It's fucking awful. - Fuck that. - I don't mind a one hour flight. I'm like, whatever. But like when it's 12 hours, sometimes having a bad seat is really fucking- - Even a prison transport system has seats, guys. Come on. - They do. - You got a prison bus, you can sit down, right? - Yeah, yeah. - Come on now. - It's sad, man. - Sad, man. But the point was is that, yeah, now that I'm older, I'm grateful that my parents took me on vacation, but when I was a kid, I fucking hated it. - Also, now I'm older, I'm glad I have disposable income. - Yeah, right.

Thinking back to the broke uni student days, you know what I mean? But yeah, going back to Christmas, did you ever have like any Christmas movies or like stuff that you'd watch? - I never got the concept of Christmas movies or holiday movies. I don't know, like my dad is like such a fucking film star. The moment he hears the word Christmas movies, he's like get the shit away from me. - I had relationships where they would wanna watch

fucking around that time, they would just be obsessed with watching the same fucking movies. And I'm like, I don't wanna watch. - I am currently in that relationship right now. - I'm a poor fucking man. I'm like, you know what? Disney movies are fine, but can we not watch just Disney movies? Can we just watch something else? - Oh, I'd rather that than the shitty live action Christmas movies.

- Like it's always, they always have like the same kind of titles. It's always the same theme of like, oh, it's a romantic comedy kinda, but it's also wholesome. And by the way, the entire soundtrack to the movie is Christmas carols. Have fun. - Every relationship that I've been in, they're like, yeah, I love this Christmas movie. And they put it on, it's fucking elf.

It's always Elf. - It's always, it's Elf. - Always fucking Elf. - Elf is like the Christmas classic. - I was trying to- - It's like The Office for like white people, but on Christmas. It's just their version of it. - I was trying to convince Aki that Die Hard is a Christmas movie. - It is. - It is. - Yeah, it is totally a Christmas movie. - She did not believe me. She was like, "Die Hard? The fucking Yippee-ki-yay one?" I'm like, "Yes, the Yippee-ki-yay one. That is a Christmas movie." - There are two things that I know that I will probably not get on with a person.

if they say like, if they love Disney movies more than like a healthy amount or if they own a horse. Those are the two reasons. Those are the two ways I'll know I'm probably not gonna get on with them.

So I'm just like, this is not- - What is it about horse people? - Dude, everyone knows horse girls are crazy, man. - Yeah, that's true. - 'Cause they're gonna love the horse, especially if you're in a relationship with one, they're gonna love the horse more than they ever love you. And that's just like, that's a fact, 100%. - Horse girls are just the equivalent of car dudes. You know what I mean? - It's the dudes with the Honda Civics in their profile picture. It's like, all right. - No offense, Alexi, but... No offense, Alexi. Love you, bro.

- No, but like, I don't know. I've never, at least with us, like we never got like, especially with like Halloween movies as well. It's like Halloween movies, Christmas movies. Are there even Easter movies? Is that a thing? - They try to make that. - Is that a genre? - Yeah, there's that like hot one. - There shouldn't be a genre of Easter movies. I don't know.

- "Passion of the Christ." - "Passion of the Christ." - Fucking hell, man. - "Passion of the Christ" is an Easter movie. - You know, just good old fun. - One time my best mate, his dad for his like 14th birthday got him fucking Bruno on DVD. He had no idea what it was, but his joke was like, "Oh, I think you're gay, son, so here's Bruno."

- What? - No joke. I remember I went to his house and we were- - It's a bit of a casual home. - Yeah, I was like, "What the fuck happened to this family?" And we watched fucking Bruno at like 15 at his house. I remember being so confused with some of the scenes. - It's just like the equivalent of just like, "Here you go, why are you gay? Why are you gay? You are gay. Here's Bruno." - He was that one kid where his parents just didn't seem to give a fuck. And we're like, "Yeah, sure, you can watch porn."

- Yeah, whatever. - Why are you hurting? - You'll get to it eventually. It's all right. Just get a headstart. You'll be good. - So fucking weird, man. So weird. - I don't understand watching some of the Christmas movies, but I do like the feeling of just getting together and watching a movie.

it doesn't necessarily have to be a Christmas movie for me. - Right, that's what I understand. - But I like watching like family movies, especially on Christmas. - My parents just have shit taste in movies. - Wait, what's the definition of a family movie? Like a rom-com or?

- I don't know, I mean, I showed my parents like wolf children with the family. - Oh, okay. - That was like a very nice, you know, it was a nice family bonding moment. - I cannot get my parents to watch anything animated. They're like, "Cartoons? No, no, no, no." - This was something I had to like slowly slip in the idea for years. This was like inception, you know?

- You don't just like rock up and Christmas and be like, mom, dad, I wanna show you some animated titties. No, you gotta like plant the seed to be like, yo, there's some like- - I could not get my parents to like, no matter what I do, they would refuse. - Yeah, my dad was like fucking strict about his movies. 'Cause again, he's a fucking film snob. So he's like the only anime movies that I will like and enjoy is Akira and Wicked City.

If it doesn't have animated in it, I ain't interested. - I think to people in the UK, especially around my parents' age, to them, anything animated equals for children. - Right, right. - You should show them "Wicked City." - I mean, I'm sure if I did, they would be like, "What on earth is this?" - My dad liked "Ninja Scroll" as well. - Oh, dad. - Yeah, yeah. - Your dad has taste, man. - But those are the only three movies. It's like, is it violent? Does it have titties in it? I'll watch it.

- Hell yeah. - So there's no way- - Not really a Christmas movie though, is it? - No, I don't expect my dad to be like, "Hey son, Merry Christmas. Let's watch 'Wicked City'." Yeah, I don't know. I never got the idea of holiday movies. I just never really...

- Because again for us, like Christmas was like a time to like celebrate with like family. - I mean like, do you believe in the so-called like Christmas spirit and everything like that? - What do you think? - Well, I don't know, because like it's different now. Like, but the only thing that's different now really is being a YouTuber. 'Cause like my entire life,

up until I became a YouTuber, Christmas was this like special holiday. 'Cause it was a holiday. Like, especially if you're in like an office job as well, it was the biggest holiday you got of the year. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And so, I don't know, it was just like, I feel like I got programmed into thinking that this was like a, just a special holiday. And even if I wasn't with family, you know, something like watching,

watching Christmas anime for me, like watching like some of my favorite Christmas anime, like the Disappearance of Haruhi was just like, that's something I could never get bored of watching. - Yeah man, me too. - Near Christmas day. I know you love, I know you love Disappearance of Haruhi and stuff like that. Like I don't give a shit about most Christmas movies, but give me that Christmas anime, man.

- I don't know, I never chalked up. I never thought, huh. - I suppose it's weird for you because you grew up in a country where it's sunny in Christmas, you know? So every Christmas movie- - There's no concept of like grabbing a blanket and cuddling up on the couch to watch a Christmas movie because you'd be sweating your ass off. - It's just always fucking cold in the UK. So it was like, all right, well, same thing. - Yeah, for us it's like, oh, Merry Christmas, let's turn on the cricket.

That was it for us, right? - I mean, I think that as I get older, I think I appreciate the idea of it more, which is just spending time with family, especially 'cause my little brother lives with my parents and my older brother doesn't live too far away. So it's not hard for them to go visit him. But for me, it's like, 'cause I haven't seen them in over like a year, I guess, when I moved to Japan.

And originally they were like, "You gonna come back for Christmas Connor?" Like the first Christmas, which was like three months after I moved here. I was like, "No, I just got here. "I'm not coming back. "Fuck that, I'll come next Christmas." - I'm gonna celebrate Christmas with the boys. - "I'll come next Christmas, psych, that never happened." So yeah, I haven't seen my family in like over a year and a half now, which is like, I don't know, is that weird?

- No, it's weird. - I mean, it's weird and I'm sure you would have seen them. - Oh, I would have normally, yeah, definitely seen them like that. - Oh yeah, yeah, we would not be here right now if the regular corona wasn't. - Yeah, probably would be back, but that's how it is unfortunately. - Yeah, unfortunately. - I guess as I get older, it's made me appreciate, you know, that what it is, it's an excuse to, "All right, all right, go and see my family then, come on." - Yeah, I dunno, like I remember like when, as a kid and as a young adult, I'm just like, "Who gives a shit about tradition?" - "I'm too cool."

- Who really gives about tradition and all this stuff. But like growing older, I'm just like, you know, there is something a bit special about keeping family traditions and doing something special. And like, you know, it's the whole Christmas spirit thing is like cheesy and like cheesy and shit like that. But I will say like doing something special that you do every year on Christmas that reminds you of, you know, how you were as a kid and you know, the stuff that your parents

parents like bestowed upon you and everything. It's like, there's something special about that. You appreciate, I appreciate more. Like there was like, I really liked as a kid, didn't get it as a teenager and a young adult and like more grown older, the more I'm like, yeah, you know, that's a special thing. - Yeah, I also wanna, you know, just,

keep in touch with my parents obviously and just see them as much as I can. 'Cause I just thought about it. I was like, fuck, my little kid's gonna be a little shit if he's raised by me. Like he's gonna fucking, he's gonna fuck off the moment he can. I better instill some values in him to come back and say hi, you know? But I'm an old fuck.

- It's like, but dad, you did the same thing. It's like, no. - 'Cause I mean like as a kid, the highlight of Christmas was the fucking presents, right? But as you grow older, presents become like a non-factor nowadays when you can just, when you have a disposable income. - It's like, all right, give me the presents. Get me a drink though, right now. - My parents now they're like, what do I get you Connor? Because you know, you buy everything you want. And I'm like, well, I don't know actually. Yeah, I don't know. Think of something.

- Yeah. - It's like money, can I have some money? - So now that presents are just like a non-factor, you gotta have something to live forward to for the Christmas holidays, right? - That's true. - Spending time with the family.

- Spending time with the fam. - Spending time with the fam. - Or the boys. - Or the boys. - Yeah, to explain what we did last year on Christmas, we just stayed up till like 3:00 AM watching Super Monkey Ball speed runs and it was fucking amazing. - That was good. - That was amazing. - Don't belittle it. - Can we start that tradition? Get the family around and watch speed runs. - Honestly.

- I could start that fucking tradition, man. - It is good, man. - You don't know the magic of Super Monkey Ball speed runs until you watch one. - Dude, especially when you're drunk as well. They're like insane. Like it just defies gravity and just enjoyment.

- That's really entertaining, man. - It was super entertaining. But we also watched Die Hard, right? Before that. - We did watch Die Hard. Oh yeah, we did. We actually did watch Die Hard. - Oh, we did watch a Christmas movie. - Because that was when I was still naive and thinking like Die Hard isn't a Christmas movie. And then you guys were like, no, no, trust us. - Yeah, 'cause we were eating the hot pot, right? While it played. That's right. - Yeah. And then we were like, let's watch a Christmas movie. Die Hard.

And then we watch something like, well, you know what? I stand corrected. This is a Christmas movie. - It is a Christmas movie with a Christmas spirit. - Before fucking Bruce Willis just gave up on acting. Have you seen his recent films? - No. - Oh, fucking hell, they're awful. - Really? - He refuses to like do anything and he has a double doing everything.

- Jesus. - You should watch some of them, dude. Watch, what was it? Hard Kill? Watch that movie. - Hard Kill? - Hard Kill, watch that movie, dude. - That sounds like a fucking die hard sequel. - I fucking watched it and it's, oh my fucking God. - 'Cause I watched Looper and I was like, I just realized the absurdity of that name. - He does. - Hard Kill. - He does like six movies a year and they're all like straight to DVD. - That's like a Kojima character.

You know what I mean? - Seriously, watch these dude. - It's like a metal gear character. - In some of these scenes, he's like given so little fuck about trying that like it's just a dubbed over actor. - Really? - He's so lazy dude. - It's just like, let's take two edgy words and smash them together. Like death knife.

- Please, okay, this Christmas, we're watching "Hard Kill" and you can see how fucking awful Bruce Willis is. - I gotta see, I gotta see. - He's fucking terrible. - 'Cause I think the last Bruce Willis film I watched was "Loopa."

And even then it was like, I was like, dude, you're not even trying. - You can tell he's giving up. He's giving up. He doesn't give a fuck. - This guy's made his cash already. Like he's just, he's just needed now. - Why still do it, dude? You've made so much money. Just fucking stop. - Yeah. That one, Joseph Gordon-Levitt was like acting. Bruce Willis was just like, yeah, you can do, you can carry this one. - Bruce Willis always turns up and is just like Bruce Willis.

He turns up to the set and apparently like all the things he does is like, he agrees to do like three days of shooting and that's it. Like no more, no retakes. - Really? - Anything that physically doesn't require him is a body double. So even if it's like getting on his knees, like don't you get a body double because he's too lazy to do it.

- I did watch a, I don't know when it was, it was pretty recent, but a Wired did like Bruce Willis answers like most Googled questions. - He doesn't give a fuck. - It was one of the most boring Wired videos I'd ever seen. 'Cause he just, he was monotone the entire time. - He's like Harrison Ford when you can tell that he respects the movie and the director, he fucking tries like in "Blade Runner," the new one, he was fucking amazing. But when he's in interviews, he's like, I don't fucking give a shit. But Bruce Willis is always like that.

- Like nothing makes Bruce Willis care. Like he literally is like the angriest oldest cunt in all of these interviews. Like you can tell he's like, "No, whatever I've made my money. I just sat up, I just turned up and said words, you know, it's acting." It's like, all right, Bruce Willis, fucking hell. - God, could you imagine if YouTubers get to that point? - I'd argue some maybe are. - I mean, yeah, true. I didn't wanna say, but you know, some of us are already there.

- Not us, I mean, like some YouTubers are already there. - God. - I just couldn't imagine just still doing it when I hate this. Like, I'm not like that. - Especially if you've already made your like fucking fortunate name. - At that point, you're just doing it to stay relevant. - Yeah. - Right. - Speaking of YouTubers again. - Yeah, but like that's the thing, right? So you don't have to stay relevant if you're like at the point of like Bruce Willis. Like everyone knows your fucking name

and what you look like. - That's why like, no one watches action movies and has like a big name to it. And that's why they get him. Because he just makes up a lot of bank. His name has a lot of pull for action movies. And he just doesn't give a fuck. - That's true. - I mean, are action movies even like a big thing nowadays? - Yeah, 'cause John Wick is gigantic. - I was gonna say like, aside from John Wick. - But that's the thing, right? If you can bring it back and you can do it well,

with the right actors. Like it'll be huge. - You're talking about like, you know, ones that aren't falling under like a notable IP, right? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, but John Wick wasn't- - Like Hard Kill. - John Wick wasn't a notable IP until, you know, Keanu Reeves made it notable. - But when did John Wick 1 come out? - Hard Kill to me sounds like one of those- - Six, seven years ago, I don't know. - Hard Kill to me sounds like one of those titles where like, so when I was in Thailand, right? That I would always have this like,

I would always go to like in Southeast Asia, there's always these stores that you can buy pirated DVDs, let's say. And you'd go through, you'd flick through the covers and you'd see these like the most random movies of these like A-list actors, but you'd never heard of the film before. That's hard kill. - That is also all of Bruce Willis' recent filmography. It's all movies. You're like, how is this man doing eight movies a year? How does it happen?

How do you have time for that? - I kind of want to just like go through his IMDb now just to see like, just to see the titles. - Have a look at this shit, it's insane. And it's like, you know, I think that's the reason why. And like, imagine at the time people probably didn't give a fuck about action movies until like "Terminator" came out. And probably at that time you're like, this is crazy. What the fuck? Like, 'cause I mean, that's how James Cameron directed it. - I don't know, like '80s was like a fucking golden period for action movies. - Right, right, right, right. - 'Cause there was like the Schwarzenegger,

Who's the other one? Stallone. - Stallone. - Stallone era, right? - Claude Van Damme. - Yeah, I mean, like I could easily rewatch like so many of their action movies. - And that's also when like martial arts movies also were starting to like kind of creep in. - Yeah. - I love martial arts movies. - 'Cause I feel like before John Wick, there was this huge period where action movies were just not pulling in the numbers anymore. - No, no. - I'm just reading these fucking- - Yeah, because they're all straight to DVD. - So we have, so 2017, first kill.

- Acts of violence, death wish, air strike, 10 minutes gone, trauma center, survive the night. I don't know any of that. By the way, all of those are direct to DVD. - All of them are. - They sound like a satire of themselves at that point. - No one wants to hire him because why would you? He's just gonna turn up and fucking be lazy. - And there's five movies right now that has been announced with him in it that is like to be announced.

- "Midnight in the Switchgrass", cosmic sin. - We're watching one of these on Christmas, man. I got it because they're fucking awful. We gotta watch them. It's terrible. He's given up dude. It's terrible. - Oh my God. That's really sad. - Just stop making films. Like why? - It's really sad. - We'll watch one of these on Christmas and tell you how it is next time. - Why? - Oh my God. - Yeah, do you boys have any plans this Christmas? Like? - I mean,

- I'm curious to see what this Christmas will be like in the current world situation. - True. - This is probably gonna be the most depressing Christmas of all time. - Because Christmas in Japan is like, it's a bit weird because- - Yeah, do you wanna explain what Christmas in Japan is like? - Yeah, so essentially- - Made by KFC, literally. - Yeah, Christmas in Japan is sponsored by KFC, basically. It's like, KFC is the go-to place. - How did that start? How did that start? - Okay, it's because, I did a video on this a few years ago, but basically the theory is that

Colonel Sanders, right? Looks like Santa. That's the theory because think about it, right? Think about it. Christmas colors. What are the Christmas colors? Red, right? What does Colonel Sanders dressed up in? Red, right? - Does he? - Yeah. - It's a white suit, I thought. - Yeah, but the KFC color has red in it, right? And then Colonel Sanders is an old guy with a white beard.

- Kind of looks like Santa, right? - I bet if you trace that back, it's like the most five head KFC employee, like working in the marketing team. - That's basically it. It was a marketing ploy by KFC to be like- - Oh, it was a marketing ploy. - Yeah, basically they were like, "Well, you know, the Christmas dinner overseas in the West is, they have chicken. They have roast chicken. Fried chicken is kind of the same thing, right? It's still chicken.

Why don't we try this? Let's try one Christmas. - Too bad, it's pretty fucking weird. - We're gonna try and sell this. And it just fucking exploded because you can't get a roast chicken in Japan other than KFC. - Outside of some conbini's I saw this, there'd be an employee dressed in a Santa outfit with a fried chicken. - Yeah, Santa Cadeage, fried chicken. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Or they sell like cakes, right? - This is so fucking weird. What am I looking at?

It's bizarre. - I'm looking at an Asian man dressed in a Santa costume, salmi fried chicken in the name of Christmas. And I'm like, what the fuck? - But it's also weird as well because like normally like everywhere else in the West, right? Christmas is like a family thing, right? You gather like mom, dad, grandparents. But in Japan, it's like,

a beta Valentine's day. - Yeah, it's a romantic thing. - You go on dates. You ask your girl to the prom, that's Christmas here. - But that part I understand because literally a week later is New Year's Eve, right? And New Year's Eve is like a super Buddhist family thing in Japan. So it makes sense that- - The opposite of what it is in Western culture. - Yeah, pretty much right. In Western culture it's like, oh, New Year's Eve. - Let's get fucked up! - Yeah, let's get fucked up. See you next year, parents. Yeah, so I don't know.

I personally have, I mean, well this year I plan to go up North to go see Chris and we're gonna go to Natsuki's place and have KFC.

- For Christmas? - Yeah, that's the plan. That's the plan and I'm like, man, first time ever. I've been living here five years, first year I'm gonna have the true Japanese Christmas experience of eating KFC. I'll let you boys know how depressing it actually is. - Because it's not like, I remember before coming to Japan, I'd heard so many rumors about Japanese KFC being like the best KFC in the world. You ain't tried KFC until you had Japanese KFC. And then I came here

And then I ate it and then it was just KFC. - I genuinely think the UK one was better even. - I thought the UK one was better. - We had a better menu. - It is the most meat KFC I've ever had. - Yeah. - Man, I love the burgers, the chicken sandwiches that you get in KFC. They're fucking amazing. - Oh yeah. - In the UK, they're so good as well. - Honestly, I don't know what it is about UK KFCs. - It's good. - I feel though you guys have kind of perfected like fast food chicken with Nando's, right?

- I mean, that's like South African though, I think originally. - Right. - But we just, I think every single fast food chain in the UK has like fried chicken options, but as a, not on its own. Like McDonald's, I think some of the most popular stuff they sell in the UK is like, just like a- - The McChicken Selects. - Chicken Selects and also like the wrapped chicken. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh, okay, okay, yeah. - That's fucking amazing. That's the best thing I get. - Yeah, that stuff is good. - And every like,

every like dirty kebab store has like the fried chicken option as well. So there's just fried chicken everywhere. But like, yeah, I don't know, like, because,

- Yeah, British is the best KFC. Japan is like somewhere in the middle. - America is depressing. - America is just like, do I want to feel like shit? - KFC it is. - Yeah, I don't know why like American KFC just stopped trying. 'Cause it's not like America doesn't have bad fried chicken options. It's just one of their, like some of their biggest chains are just the worst in America. And I don't understand why. - I remember I was drunk one time and someone gave me a KFC chicken. - In America? - Yeah, and even drunk me was like, this is vile.

And you know it's bad if I've drunk beers like, this is too much. I draw the line at the amount of grease that's on this thing. Like the skin wasn't crispy, it was moist from all the grease it had. And I'm like, that's vile. Sorry, we somehow turned this all around a bashing America.

- I love America, I do. I just, what's going on there? - America can do chicken correctly, case in point, Chick-fil-A. - Yeah, Chick-fil-A. But that's why I don't understand why anyone in America would eat KFC when there's stuff like Chick-fil-A or Popeyes or other stuff. - I've never seen good reviews on Google Maps for like KFC. It's always like two stars and I'm like, who's willingly going in here? Stop giving them fucking customers, just stop. - Yeah.

- Probably because it's Sunday, right? And Chick-fil-A is closed. - Oh yeah, that's true. I mean, not all parts of America have Chick-fil-A apparently. - Yeah, no, they don't do that. - Like East Coast doesn't have Chick-fil-A or something. I don't know. - There's like different chains, like different areas is what I know.

But all I know is KFC is the worst fried chicken I've ever had in America. - Honestly now, I feel like Christmas for me is more of like, it's Christmas when I spend it with the people, right? So it doesn't have to be on Christmas day, just around the time, you know, give or take, as long as I hang out with some friends. - It could be like a week before. - Get a few drinks. - You know, just be like, let's just do an early Christmas, you know? - Exchange a few gifts, you know? - I do want to do something on Christmas 'cause there's,

- I've had like Christmases where I've done nothing before. And it is a bit depressing when you're just like by yourself or they do nothing. You go on your timeline, go to your Twitter. Everyone's opening presents with each other. - But what if you're having like Christmas day the next day with your friends? It's like, all right, whatever, I'm getting it.

I think it's what's worse is New Year's alone for some reason. - I've had New Year's alone before. - Yeah, same, I have too. And for some reason it's more depressing than Christmas alone. I don't know why. - I spent New Year's one year in the worst fucking way possible. I think I was like 16.

And I was working up at a ski falls. The first time I was working up at a ski field and we're in the middle of Hokkaido in the mountains. It's like fucking minus 30 degrees in a fucking blizzard. And of course I'm working that day. I'm outside in the fucking blizzard shoveling snow. But on top of that, one of the hotels had a blocked sewage system.

And I had to get in there with a fucking shovel. So imagine a 16 year old, right? In the middle of a fucking blizzard in the mountains, literally shoveling shit out of the ground. - Happy new year. - At like 11:00 PM. And literally the moment we've unclogged the thing, my boss was like, "Oh, it's the next year. Happy new year."

- Did you unclog it? - Yeah, we did. - Nice. - But also it was like, cool. My first experience of the new year is the smell of frozen shit in a- - It's only up from there, right? - Yeah, I mean, yeah, true. It was a good year, but it wasn't the greatest start to the year, that's for sure. I feel like new year is like the biggest hoax that everyone's put over the world. - It's never as good as you want it to be.

- It's hyped up as the biggest party of the year and nobody knows what they're doing until the day before. I swear to fucking God. - Everything's full. Like you can't get in anywhere. - Everywhere's overpriced. Everywhere's full. Everyone's doing something aside from you for some reason, even though you ask a week before, "Hey, what are you doing for New Year's?" And they don't fucking know. And yet somehow,

On New Year's, you're that one fucker who just has nothing planned. - It's always the worst when like the last day of the year, you have the biggest FOMO of the year. - It is always somehow, more often than not, I end up just doing nothing for New Year's and always being like, fuck, I missed out again.

- Yeah, you might as well rename New Year's Eve FOMO party. 'Cause that's what it is. That's what New Year's Eve is. Everyone goes out because they're afraid of missing out because I've spent New Year's alone before and it is depressing. It's really fucking depressing. - Shout out to the people out there who are just gonna be alone. - But like at the same time, some of my worst fucking nights

- I saw it been on New Year's Eve as well. - Yeah, that's true. - It's never a good night. It's always just so stressful 'cause you can never get like a taxi either if you need to get back 'cause everyone's getting taxis back. - It only took me one New Year's Eve of going out to know that, all right, next New Year's Eve from now on is just house parties. - The only people who win are Uber drivers, man. They're the only ones winning the New Year's. - True, true, true. - Fuck, man. God, New Year's is the worst.

- Fuck, I just realized how much I hate New Year's. It's like, gotta do something, I don't wanna be sad. - You're either sad or you're having a shit night. Or you're broke. There's no like- - There's no perfect New Year's Eve. - There's no perfect New Year's Eve. - Yeah, that's true. - God, I fucking hate New Year's.

- Do you guys have any plans for this new year's? - No. - No. - I'll figure that out when it comes to it. - Yeah, you'll figure that on the 30th. - We just said, nobody knows what they're doing until like the day fucking before. - Yeah, because everyone's like, they always do this thing for New Year's, right? Where everyone's like, we could go here.

Everyone is always like, which one are we doing? - They're throwing suggestions. - Yeah, everyone's throw suggestions around New Year's, but no one wants to commit to it because you don't want to be the asshole who took them to a place that's full. And then it's like, well then what? - 'Cause no one wants to commit 'cause everyone knows, okay, this place is gonna be overpriced and full. Let's leave this until like the last moment. Because the thing is there is no good place on New Year's Eve. But you have to go to a place.

- Right. - Maybe your friend can get you into somewhere and then you can only get like half of your friends in. - Right. - And then it's like, well, what the fuck's happening? Do we just leave half our friends and tell them to go fuck themselves? - Yeah, but the best New Year's Eve party would probably be a house party.

but like no one wants to host a New Year's Eve house party. - True, it's always like a voting ballot that you just don't want to win. - And even then it's like, do I really like everyone at this party? Is it like some of the people? - Because as like a teenager, if you were hosting a New Year's Eve house party, that house was getting trashed. - Oh yeah. - You knew it was getting trashed. And no matter how small you wanted it to be, it was never going to be small. 'Cause it's a New Year's Eve party. - Yeah, but yeah, because you don't want it to be like, because it's somehow like,

reverse like depressing when it's like three people. - Too small and it's depressing. - But like, I swear, like as a teenager, you'd have like fucking sniffer dogs trying to sniff out house parties, man. You're just like, where can we go boys? Where can we go? - I've heard in the grapevine that there is a house party somewhere around here. You'd always know that one.

who'd know someone who'd known someone who's like, who'd heard about a house party happening on New Year's Eve. - I'm not proud to admit, definitely spent a New Year's just going to house parties that like were just full and then not being able to get into any of them. And then I was like, "Guess we're just going to Tesco's and getting a few beers and just sitting outside." - I've had some of the most like depressing years of trying to like house hunt a house party. And we'd just be literally, we'd literally be at like six.

and like the timer would start and be like, okay, who's heard some rumors? We're gonna follow up on every rumor. Phone up all your contacts. - Ask everyone. - It's like a fucking LA noir mission. - It is, it is. Gather clues right now. - Call up all the favors you know. Because no one's gonna know

- Because no one wants to be that guy who invites everyone to the house party. But sometimes, you know a mate who owes you a favor who's at the house party. You're like, "Just give me the general directions." - "It's the last day of the year, just come, do us all." - Or when you've ever had a friend who just got blackout drunk before midnight and it's like, "Fuck, man." - I've been there before. - You gotta fucking take care of them now and gotta, fuck. - I've had some New Years where I've passed out at 10:00 PM.

Just like, alright, see you next year, lads. Those are the days.

- Man, what a depressing message to end this year off. - Hey man, if you're depressed on New Year's, don't worry, everyone is. - Everyone is. - We've all been there. - But you know who isn't depressed? Our wonderful patrons. - Oh my God, look at them. - Look at these amazing patrons. - Thank you so much patrons. You're not depressing. You make me not depressed. - You gave us the real Christmas presents. - Your patronage has made us happy. - Shout out to all the fucking degenerates who just like, so we are filming this just after the massive fucking burst from my hentai episode.

- What the fuck? What the fuck did you guys do? - That was the definition of stonks. - People like porn, man. People like porn. - Stonks brain. I didn't realize throughout my entire five year YouTube career, like that all I needed to do was to talk about animated porn. Why didn't you tell me this at the beginning of my career? - With the amount of hentai videos I've made, I am actually like, that jump actually made me depressed.

- I could have cashed in on that man, but I didn't. - But yeah, if you'd like to join us on the Patreon with lovely rewards and whatnot, then you can go over to patreon.com/trashtaste, links in the description. Also check out our Twitter and subreddit as well. Send us all your Christmas and New Year's memes. - Yes, fantastic. - And share us your best gifts and everything like that. - Yeah, let us know in the comments. - We don't know what we're getting for Christmas yet.

- Shout out to patrons. - Shout out to patrons. Hope you've had a very merry Christmas or like you have to say happy holidays now, don't you? - Happy holidays. - Fucking. - Merry Christmas. Hope you have, because it's boxing day. Merry Christmas and we hope you have

- Non-depressing New Year's. - Wow, Garnt. - But yeah, this is the last episode of 2020. - Yeah. - Yeah, and next time we see you guys will be 2021. Hopefully it won't suck as much as 2020. - It probably will. - It probably will. - We've set the bar so low, I don't wanna say, can't get any worse, right guys? Well, shit, I've already said it. - At least Trash Taste did good this year, boys. - Exactly, exactly. Thank you for joining us on Trash Taste 2020. See you next year. - Happy holidays. - Happy holidays. - See you next year. - Bye. - Bye.