This Is Why Real Men Cry | Trash Taste #94
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Good evening. It's me, The Monk. Have you ever listened to Trash Taste and Thoughts? That doesn't seem too hard. I can do that. Well, you're in luck, because today I want to talk about Anchor, the easiest way to make podcasts, and it's completely free. Anchor will distribute your podcast for you, so it can be heard on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and

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anime it's everything you need to make a podcast in one place so if you want to give podcasting a go download the free anchor app or go to anchor.fm to get started anyway back to the episode hello and welcome to another episode of trash taste i'm your host for today gant and joining me once again are the boys jesus christ sorry god damn it joey we had it we had the perfect take which was the only take we've ever done today uh you know

- Outtakes on patreon.com/trashtaste of course. - Damn, I should have knew that shit out early. - Yeah, of course, of course, right? - Dude, just spill half of this. - Oh my fucking, guys, I thought we were professionals. We've been doing this- - Dude, the hay fever season's fucking kicking in. - We've been doing this for almost like two years now. We should be on this, man. We should be on this. - Fucking hell. - I'm sorry, I'm sorry. - The vine boom sound effect.

I've just, yeah, I've been just, hay fever's been kicking my ass this season. Yeah, all of a sudden, I hate it. Yeah. And especially like now, when you're sniffling on a train and you just see like all these like-

- Some Japanese guys have like these most aggressive gravelly coughs, dude. They just come out of nowhere. I don't know how they have coughs. - You hear that every so often. - Always. - I don't know how they do it. - Exactly that volume. - Especially in COVID, deep in COVID season as well, you're just like, you're on high fucking alert, man. I'm like one of those guards in Metal Gear Solid and the fucking alert pops up and I'm just like, oh.

- I actually saw at my local bookstore, they were selling these pins during the pandemic, like in the middle of the pandemic that just said like during a hay fever season, it was a pin that just said, "Don't worry, I have hay fever."

And so people would like, if there was sniffling on the train, you just like show off the badge and be like, I don't have COVID guys. - But what if you had COVID and you bought that anyway, just to be like, guys, it's hay fever. - Trust me, trust me. - What if you had both? - Yeah, 'cause I remember, 'cause I was at like a little bit of hay fever, but also I remember one week I just got like a cough or something and getting a cough during the pandemic time is like the worst, right? 'Cause normally it feels bad

to cough in public anyway, but like you're like, when you have like, just, it's just like a dry cough especially, you have to like, you're so conscious about it, right? - Yeah. - About like how often you're coughing and it just makes the cough, like when you're thinking about it, it just makes the cough 10 times worse. You know what I mean? - Yeah. - And like, especially on like public transport, you just, I remember like normally,

normally going to my old place, it would be stressful if I needed to take a shit, right? You know, when you're like holding it in. I was like holding in this fucking cough and like fucking like spacing this cough out that I had for like a good 40 minutes or however long that journey was. And I don't know if anyone around me like noticed it, but I was like-

- I don't know, I was fucking sweating from like how much I was trying to hold in this cough. - I thought you were like holding in the cough 'cause you didn't wanna like shit yourself in the process. - Just do it, I'm just gonna be like, I'm gonna do it. Who cares? What are they gonna do? It's not like a zombie apocalypse where if you've been bitten, they're gonna kill you. - Have you ever coughed in shit at the same time? - No, why? - We're not talking about shitting yet. - Yeah, it's weird. - I'll leave it for the second hour. - Do you have a story joke? - No.

- Just curious. - I don't know, I just. - You've never done that? - Of course I've done it. - What do you mean, I've never done that? - I don't have a story on it. - Don't say of course I've done it. Like I have also, we've all done it. We haven't all done that.

- I have never done that, unfortunately, Joey. - Sorry, I'm sorry, man. - It's a sensation. - So are you on the toilet or? - Yeah, of course I'm on the toilet. - Okay, that doesn't count. That doesn't count. - That's what I meant. I don't mean like, I'm not asking you to be like, have you shat yourself before in public? Like I think we've already- - I've shat myself on the toilet. - We've talked about that before. But yeah, no, just like on the toilet and you just like, it's not coming out and then you use the power of the cough to like exert your body.

- This is how you get hemorrhoids. - You know what, let's change the subject. - This is how you get hemorrhoids, I'm not sure.

- I think the only thing that comes close to that isn't like shitting yourself, but like it's when you go back to the gym for the first time in ages, you have like ab day or something. And like the day after your entire body aches and like the one time you sneeze, it just like puts your entire body into like pain mode. - I literally did this like two weeks ago. I had an ab day for the first time in months. Not one day, it was like five days afterwards. - Oh really? Why was it laggy?

- Dude, no, no, no, as in like for the next five days. - Oh, like in a row. - It hurts so much. - Yeah, I see, I see.

- 'Cause then you went hard. - I just went too hard, man. I just went too hard. I don't know, what can I say? - Talking about seasons though, like can Japan chill with its changing of seasons? I don't know, like last week it felt like winter. It felt like it was coming on the tail end of winter. It was like warming up a little bit. And I think we had two days of spring, like spring weather. And I remember like going out yesterday or the day before in this jacket and I was sweating my ass off.

- Ass off already. And I just like Japan, I've just noticed it doesn't have a transition period. You just wake up one day and it's a new season. - And they say Japan has four seasons. What a lot of shit. - It's such a lot. Japan has two seasons. It's hot or cold. - It is two. It's winter and summer. That's all they have. - It's like different stages of cold and then just different stages of hot. There's no warm.

There's no like warm period. You get like the two day- - The warm period is maybe like in the evening when like the sun's just gone down and like the residue of like the concrete heat is like escaping. That's when it's like, okay, that's kind of pleasant. But then immediately afterwards, it's just like, oh, now it's cold as shit 'cause you're in a t-shirt like an idiot. - I always forget how hot it is until the summer comes. And then I'm like, oh yeah, this is hell. - Yeah. - I think it's like trauma for me.

I like forget about it. And I'm like, what? Summer what? I'm winter game bro, I'm wearing a coat. And I forget that for half the year in Japan, you just can't wear more than one t-shirt. - Yeah, exactly. - Unless you're a Japanese person. - Who can wear a full suit and an overcoat. - Yeah, and it'd be like, oh, it's a little dab of sweat right here. - What temperature is in the office? Can we have 30 degrees Celsius please? What? - Yeah, I don't know how I walk around in the summer and just see like business people in full on suits

Like running along With that briefcase And I'm here dying In my t-shirts and shorts I'm a sweater I'm a big sweater boy I am I am as well I sweat like a motherfucker I am It's It's

- I mean, like I'm the complete opposite of Sydney because she doesn't sweat enough when it comes to heat. Like I'd like, we're deep in summer and like feel her forehead and it's just like, there's zero perspiration at all. - Yeah, Aki's exactly the same. I'm like, that's how you get heat. - Our body's working. - Yeah. - If you sweat a lot, that's healthy.

- Yeah. - Technically. - It's water weight, isn't it? - It's water weight. - I mean, I mean, I mean. - It's water weight. - To me it's like, it's a copium. Like it's healthy, it's healthy because like, I feel like the tiniest bit of heat and my armpits especially just start, just start perspirating and there's no way like, and like, there's no way that doesn't ruin anything you fucking wear unfortunately. So I just have to like be worried in the summer, even if I'm not, even if,

even if I'm like underneath air conditioning, I still sweat sometimes. - For me it's weird. I don't sweat through my armpits as much. For me it's all in the face, which is horrible because you can't hide that shit. - You're literally like that meme of that guy. I don't know. He's like on the radio. He's like. - I'm like that Key and Peele gif where it's just like dripping wet.

But like the rest of my body is okay, I hate it. But yeah, I mean, I guess that's why we're from England, right? I mean, do you feel like being British has conditioned you to like cold weather or do you feel like you've gotten used to like other climates now that- - I don't think it's the temperature, it's more so the sun. I think I'm allergic to the sun.

- Is that 'cause you're white? - Yeah, no, very white, very white. Very white indeed, actually. - But I would understand because you guys have that lack of sun in the UK, but in Australia we have an overdose of sun. So I'm also traumatized by too much sun as well. 'Cause in Japan it's like sometimes the sun works and then sometimes it works overtime. - I still think the summer was worse in the UK than it was in Japan because we don't have AC.

- Oh yeah. - So it's like three, four weeks of like, at least the last time I was there, it was like three, four weeks of just uncomfortable sweating and I can't do anything. It was like, at least in Japan, I can game all day in a comfortable AC climate room, right? It's not, yeah, okay, when I go outside, it sucks, I sweat. But like, I take that over having to be in my bedroom sweating and being able to do nothing

- That's true. - It's horrible. Like you get one of those fans that blows air, but I feel like that's literally like a copium machine. It doesn't do anything. - You just move the air around. - It's just blowing the hot air into my face. - I actually like the fan. - I think it's a Southeast Asian thing. - I think it is. - I think it is. - Southeast Asian people, they love fans. I swear, they're just like fans all the time. - So to me, you admit defeat.

if you are putting on the AC, right? That means you are more weak than the weather. - Why is the fan any different? - I don't know, the fan, I like the feeling of just hot, not exactly cold air. - Did you say you're a fan? - Fuck off, Joe, fuck off. - Just stand under the AC. - Because to me, the AC, it just feels like, how can I put this? It feels like artificial air. - I get it. - Does that make sense? - No, I understand that the AC air is not one you wanna be like,

I don't know why, it feels weird. - 'Cause I feel the same way about like heaters, right? Where if you have, there's a difference in having like a warm room and having a room that's been warmed up by a heater, right? 'Cause it feels 10 times more stuffy for some reason. - Oh yeah. - Like I don't like the feeling of just the artificial heat as opposed to just being in a country or in a temperature that is comfortable, like naturally outside. Same thing with AC for me.

me with AC if you get if you have a room that's cooled with AC it just feels I don't know like the air how can I describe this it feels like it feels sterile

You know what I mean? You know what I mean? - No, I don't. - It feels sterile. - This is first world problems. - It is first world problems. - I agree, I agree. - Like it just like, I breathe it in, it's just unnaturally dry. Sometimes like my asthma, like my lungs feel the dry air way more with AC air than with like just cold air in general. I don't know. It's completely something that is just a me issue, but that's why I much prefer having a fan as opposed to having the AC.

- Did I ever tell you about why my apartment smelled like shit for like the first two months? - Your current apartment? - Yeah. - Why? - No. - Like literal shit or? - Like literal shit. - Is it 'cause of the AC? - Yeah, so.

I moved into this apartment building and something just kept smelling weird. I couldn't put my finger on it, right? And I'm wondering, what the fuck is this thing? I turn the AC off, right? It's still coming in. My apartment still smells like shit. This is brand new. I just got this place. Why does it smell of shit? It's not me. I'm definitely flushing. I'm covered in shit. I thought, but it's not that kind. It's like a lingering. I'm getting this, right? So,

I go to my balcony, right? And there's like bird shit. And I'm like, well, it can't be that because I clean it and it still smells of shit. I'm like, what the fuck is going on? Why does it smell of shit?

Turns out that there was this one place where these birds were shitting that was like the intake fan was right here and all the birds were just shitting right next to the intake. And I couldn't see it because it's like right next, like there's this much gap between the roof and the box they're shitting on. It's literal perfect size for one pigeon to fit in. And they loved, loved shitting there.

I don't know why they loved it. Maybe because they felt like the roof was close. It was nice. - So you basically were huffing in bugs. - I literally for two months was just huffing in. And I'm pretty sure that like pigeon poop is like one of the poops you don't want to be breathing in. - I think any poop is. - I don't want to breathe in any poop to be honest. - As in I think they have like one of the more dirty poops out there, I believe. I don't know if it's correct.

- Compared to what poop? - If I laid a log there, it's not gonna smell as bad. - Is there a poop scale of like hygiene quality? - I think so. - I think it's just like all poop, right? Surely. - I remember when I was, 'cause when I Googled like cleaning pigeon poop, there's a bunch of things that were like, "Warning, please make sure you don't actually touch the poop." 'Cause it's like filled with like disgusting parasites and stuff. - When isn't it filled with disgusting germs and stuff? - I don't know, I play with mine all the time and it's not that bad.

I could have been just a generic warning. Anyway, so I cleaned it and then I was like, great, this is amazing. It's all fixed. My apartment doesn't smell of shit. Two days later, I start smelling shit again. They just kept coming back. So I then had to install like those spikes

on it to get rid of it. And finally, now my apartment doesn't smell of shit unless I leave the door open and take a shit. Then it does smell of shit. I was going to ask how you've sorted the problem. My apartment is, my balcony is like a jerk. It's like half reflective now. I've put reflective stuff everywhere and it doesn't stop them.

- Yeah, 'cause I noticed that, 'cause in my house and in my home in Thailand, it's like on the outskirts of the city. So it's more next like nature, the nature side of things. And I noticed the spikes do fucking nothing, man. The spikes is a great place for birds to start a nest. - Wait, really? - Yeah. - These are like comically large spikes. - Okay, okay, okay. - I literally don't get any birds on my balcony. - You're so lucky. How does that work? - I don't know. - How do pigeons decide

this is the building that I'm gonna fuck up. - Maybe one pigeon is like, oi, check it out. - Yeah, 'cause sometimes we get like that one fucking pigeon that's hanging out outside the toilet of this office and I can fucking hear it 'cause I don't know why, like,

- It's like it's here and in Thailand as well. The first thing I hear when I wake up is just these birds going at each other. Like it's not even that right? It's not even pigeons. Sometimes it's just like, sometimes it's, I swear it's just like the fucking ghetto. Like it's the fucking ghetto of the birds, right? And like, and just here's like, "Oh mate, what are you doing here? What are you doing here, mate? Bruv, bruv, what are you doing?" And I'm just like-

- Every fucking morning, I don't know what it is. And we, so we installed spikes to try and stop these birds from like hanging out outside, like stop them loitering, stop the ewes loitering outside of our window. - I wanna see these spikes you were using.

- It was just like the plastic spikes. It's just like that. - Maybe it's just plastic and they just didn't do anything. - I don't know, but like we thought, okay, we're gonna install them to stop the birds like hanging out here every morning. It did the entire fucking opposite because now they like found out that spikes are great for propping up a nest there. So they just built a nest there. So we literally helped them settle down. - At that point, you just gotta give them credit. That's just impressive. Big brain.

- So yeah, unfortunately- - I'd rather the birds though. 'Cause like in Australia, I would wake up to just like possums fucking on our roof. - What does that sound? It's just like a lot of like rattling like this and a lot of like, at like two in the morning, I'm like, oh my God, please stop. - That sounds pretty good. - No, it's not. - How does that sound good? - Do they make a mess?

- I hope not. - Well, if you hope not, that means you don't know, right? So that means they probably don't make a mess. - I mean, the mess is like half the problem. It's the fact that I can't get to sleep 'cause of these pots and stuff. - I'd rather have trouble sleeping than have to clean this shit up every like two months. It's awful. They shit on my Ikea furniture as well. - Oh, because you got furniture out in your balcony as well. - So wherever I put like the reflective stuff down, they just move.

And then I put like the reflective stuff right above. What is the reflective stuff? It's like a- Like CDs? What's those? The Colossoscopes. No, what are they called? Kaleidoscope. That's it, sorry, Kaleidoscope. The Kaleidoscopes, like kind of patterns that reflect. And it just scares them off. Yeah. But sometimes it doesn't. And then other times they just like-

it's like they're edging. They'll like find a spot and they'll have one foot on and they'll just start shitting off of it. And I'm like, how am I supposed to predict this? This is insane. - That was a different, very different edging to what I thought you were talking about. - They were standing on the edge, right? I was like, the pictures are doing what? - They're probably edging just like, ah, ah, ah. - They're probably doing that as well. - Direct eye contact, just like, ah, ah.

- It's awful, it's awful. And they're like, it's such a pain in the ass. - Yeah, 'cause- - Pain in the ass. - Do you ever have to deal with annoying wildlife in the UK? - No. - I feel like the most- - You don't have any wildlife in the UK. - I feel like, okay, the most annoying thing for me in the UK is, I don't know if you have it in Wales, but in the city in Brighton at least, or at least when I was living in London as well,

Foxes, the sound that they make sometimes at night just is like the worst screech I've ever heard in my life. - You guys have foxes? - We do have foxes. - It's like the deadliest animal we have. - Yeah, they're fucking pussies though. Because you make eye contact with them, they run, they're already down the road, fucking making it down a mile. - Yeah, I used to live above a bunch of restaurants, so I always saw foxes. But they never made noise.

- They never made noise? - No. - No, actually they never make noise if they're in the vicinity of like guys or humans. But like for some, I would sometimes hear them just like screeching off in like the background. And they literally sound like, I don't know, like a kid being assaulted or something, right? Because I remember the first time Sydney like moved to England, she heard this noise and she was about to phone the police. I was like, no Sydney, that's just a fox. 'Cause it just sounds like at least-

- Like you just hear that in the background, right? And I'm just like, the first time I heard it, I was like, what is that noise? - At least that's what they tell you. It's the foxes. - It's the foxes. - Trust. - It's just the door with like plastic gloves on. Yeah, it's the foxes. - It's the foxes, yeah. - Yeah. - I don't know, I only had ants. - You had ants? - Yeah, we had ants. - Ants that would get into the house. They're pretty good ants, huh? They're really good at getting into your house. - Yeah. - Yeah, but they're like, British ants are tiny though. They're like fucking-

- Can they even be called ants? - But when there's a lot of them. - Yeah, but like, that's the problem with it. - It's not just a single ant. - Yeah, you're under arrest. Ants don't travel solo. They're not like fucking wolves. - You don't see a single ant in your house and you're like, "Oh, fuck."

- They're normally like, they're very kind to their aunts. They have a nice line that directs you to exactly where they came from. They're really, really considerate in that sense. But they'd get into like the bread bin and stuff and they'd get into like- - Yeah, like the sugar containers and stuff. - We have that a lot. - They're so good at finding it. - Like you think you've like sealed that bread box up like tight. - I can't find where the snacks are hidden in my house sometimes.

- Yeah. - So I have to follow the trail. - My parents would hide them, but the ants would always find them. They'd always leave them. - I'd never really had such a big ant problem in the UK. It was more when I was in Thailand. - Might be where you live. - Yeah, yeah. 'Cause whenever I'm in Thailand, if you have a piece of food out or you drop a tiny bit of crumb or something, there's like a timer starts.

Right before you have that time, the timer starts before you can clean it up. Otherwise the ants are gonna clean up for you. And then you just kind of a line of ants just marching through your home. Yeah. And like the thing about Thai ants is that they're pretty fucking big as well. - I'd rather them be big though, easier to kill.

- No, no, no, no. - Okay, so it's like a super villain. You know when you step on an ant and it just doesn't die and you're like, what? Is this how like the villains feel in movies when their attack doesn't work? - It's like Ant-Man. - What do you mean my attack fails? - But like in the UK, like ants are just a slight annoyance because what the fuck can they do to you, right? They're just- - What do you mean? They can like eat your food. Like make it like- - Yeah, slight annoyance. - Slight annoyance. - That's very big annoyance. - Right, like they don't bite you or anything. - I'd rather them bite me than take my food.

- Really? - Have you ever been bitten by an ant? - Not yet. - Yeah, I don't think you'll say the same thing once you get bitten by one. - Not like the fucking, what's that guy called on YouTube? Coyote Peterson or whatever. Not those kind of ants where he's like, "While my hand is swollen "and 19 times the original size, I can scarcely breathe, "but this is mildly painful." - Even if it's something like, even if it's not like toxic or like super painful, that is more of an annoyance than the ants eating your food.

- I don't know, if it was a mild pain, I'd rather that than have to like- - What if it's like a lot of mild pains? 'Cause it's a lot of ants. - A lot of mild pains. - A lot of mild pain. - A lot of mild pain, what does that mean? - Because you're not gonna get- - Can you give me an example of a lot of mild pain? - Well, because there is a- - Can you give me another example? - Because when an ant bites you, that just invites the other ants to also attack. - What's going on where I'm gonna give them a second chance? - You never know.

- What is this? - You're like, "Oh, that hurt." "Another, another please." - Again. Yes. - One more time. - Put them on my nipples, please. Bite me again.

- Do you have to deal with any annoying pests in Australia? - That is like the entry requirement. When you get in the border, they're like, "Oh mate, do you mind if a koala bites on your toe, mate?" - Nah, for what? I don't even think I've ever seen a koala in the wild. - Dude, I wanna see a koala. - They're extremely rare in the wild because they're so hidden. But like my house, we used to have these like wasps that flew around all the time. - Fuck, how'd you get rid of wasps? - You don't.

- The last time I went home, I remember my dad was like, "Son, come and join me for a beer on the balcony. It's a nice stand." I'm like, "Yeah, sure." I walk out and there's like 20 wasps just flying around. And I was like, "Father, there are a lot of wasps flying around your face right now." And he's like, "Yeah, it's all right. They won't sting you." I was like, "Okay."

- Why do wasps exist? Like, do they do anything good for anyone? No. - They are the dickheads of the internet. - Not the internet, the insect world. - What is it about so many creatures though? - But like, a lot of creatures don't actively try to like be dickheads and sting you. And like, the thing is at least,

- Are you judging an animal's worth based on how annoying it is to people? - Kind of, kind of, yeah. - Fair enough then. - What do wasps do for nature? 'Cause you know, like bees, they make honey, they pollinize flowers. And you know what? At least nature had the decency to nerf bees. They get one shot. That's like their nuclear option, man. That's like their fight for their lives. - This is how super villains are born.

- It starts with wasps, Garnt. What's the next step, huh? - Like I would be- - Is it people under six foot? Is that the next? - I would be happy if- - What's the point of people under six foot? They can't reach the shelves I designed. - I would gladly be racist towards wasps. - All right, well that's an out of context type of emoji. I would gladly be racist, cut.

- No, 'cause yeah. - Garnt's the kind of guy where if he got a death note, the first thing he'd write is wasps. - Wasps. - Just every wasp. - Everything that annoys me. - Like a one by one, one by one by name, every single wasp in the world. - Is that like a syntax error for like the death note? It comes back, it's like, sorry, did not, did not.

- Spell correctly. - I should preface, I actually have a phobia of bees and wasps. I don't know if I've ever talked about this. - You have told us. You got stung in the eye as a kid. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Okay, yeah, I would have that. - But the thing is, I've grown, even though I'm fucking deadly scared of them, in my heart, I still understand why bees are a thing. I think after years of conditioning, like bumblebees,

They look kind of cute. They look like furry and big and they pollinize. They're chonky. Yeah, they're chonky. I almost give them a hug. Have you taken any steps towards trying to conquer your fear of bees?

- I think we can do like a Fear Factor-esque kind of thing where we have a- - What would the steps be though? - Why don't we play Dark Souls music, right? Like, and then we bring out, and Garnt, your punishment for the trash taste after dark is that you have to put your head in a box of bees. - What? - What? - Where's this Fear Factor? - Yeah, let's do it. - Would you do that?

If you told me, okay, here's the thing, right? I'm an idiot. If some guy came on, he's probably, he's always Australian because on every single wildlife show where there's a wildlife expert, the fuck is always Australian. Of course. He'll come on and be like, oh yeah, they won't sting you. And then 10 seconds later, you're like, ah, ah, ah. And you're like, oh, you're fine though. You're fine. You're not gonna die. Don't worry. It changes to, oh, you won't die. Yeah, yeah. If some wildlife expert told me that it's safe to do it, I'd do it.

- What, stick your head in a box of bees? - That's a big fucking step. I mean like, I don't know if- - How much for you to put your hand in a box of bees? - How much are you willing to pay me? - One minute. - One minute? - One minute. What is the minimum price you'd do it for? - 10. - I would gladly do it for like five. Yeah, five Gs. - Five Gs, yeah, 10 G for me. - I don't know, it'd have to be more than 10 for me. I don't know, maybe. Or maybe just for content.

- That's sweet ad revenue baby. - If I'm just chilling in my living room and you can't, "Con, how much do you put in the box of bees?" I'll be like, "Oh, five grand." And then they do it. But if it's for content, I probably do it for free. - I mean, here's the thing, right? Because before, like when I was a kid, I couldn't even look at like, I couldn't even look at videos of bees. Like I'd see a bee and I'd literally scream and like run inside and like shut the door. - So if we got a box of bees, you would do it for content?

- How do they get a box of beads? - Maybe. - How do they do this on shows? How do they get a box of beads? - I go through phases where maybe out of a sense of morbid curiosity, I look at,

bee cleaning or like bee videos on YouTube, right? And just seeing like these beekeepers just fucking like scooping up like these pile of bees and just them casually being like, oh, you know, they're very friendly today. I've only been stung three times. I'm like, you've been stung three times? And that's it? That's it? I'd be fucking...

One time is more than enough for me. - I wonder how many times would you get stung if your hand was in that box for a minute, with like 100 bees. - I think if you just stay still, then probably nothing. But if you're fucking doing this. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - This is a...

- Ignorant wolf, what is it? - Wolf ignorance? - Yeah, wolf ignorance, I think. - Yeah, but like, okay, bees maybe because bees maybe, wasps get the fuck out. I'm coming here with a flamethrower. - Bees, bees, bees. - If you come here with wasps. - How about we put your hand in a box with a feral hyena gun? What are you after, for a minute? - For one minute. - Or a minute, or when? - For content, for content. - For content. - I don't know, it's like,

- I've also like been glad, have you ever seen a hornet as well? - Yeah. - Those are fucking like terrifying. I think I've seen one. - We have the killer hornets here in Japan. - Yeah, you have the killer hornets. - Yeah, those, I don't wanna fuck with those. Those are like scary. - Those are scary.

- Yeah, especially like, I remember seeing the video of just like hornet, it sounds like a fucking anime fight or something. It's like hornets versus bees. - Dude, that video is epic. Where the bees like surround it. - Yeah, the bees surround it and like, it's not even like a war, it's a massacre, right? 'Cause the hornet, like one hornets takes down like a fucking a hundred bees or something.

I feel like- - No, no, the bees fuck up the hornet. - Oh really? - Yeah. - We've seen different videos then. 'Cause I've seen- - It's too late for fights. - I don't know which bee it is, but there's videos where like, there is a way that they kill the hornet by, basically they all just compact themselves on the hornet. - Right. - And they roll around and they do it like with like such like energy that it actually just burns the hornet alive.

- What, like through friction? - Yeah, it like kills the hornet by being so hot. - Holy shit. - That's fucking metal. - Japanese honeybees. - Japanese honeybees. - They kill the Japanese hornet, like they surround it and they compact like a ball and they roll and like keep like suffocating it and burning it. - What the fuck? - It's so badass. - What? That is fucking badass. - I'm sure there'll be a clip on the screen right now. It's fucking cool. It's so cool. Like nature sometimes is like- - That just sounds like a shonen.

- I just love it that these bees figured this out. They're like, fuck it, just throw ourselves at this. - How did the bees figure that out? - I don't know, man. - Fucking hell. - You ever heard of friction? - We could use that.

- Yeah, because like the only video I've seen is where like, it's just these bees, like this hive of bees just fucking chilling, making honey. And then these fucking group of 10 hornets or something just come on and start like fucking biting their heads off, massacre this entire hive and then fuck off. I'm like, Jesus Christ. - Where was that in Bee Movie?

But yeah, like fucking nature can be fucking metal sometimes. Cause I remember seeing this video, not about bees, but I think it was like ants and scientists would just were like, they were studying fire ants because fire ants have a way when they're moving in a group or have, they have, how can I word this? When they're, what do you call like a group of ants? A horde.

- A colony? - Yeah, a colony of ants. The way they act and behave sometimes can behave like a liquid and sometimes can behave like a solid. - This is certain ants I think can do it, not all of them. - Yeah, not all of them. I think it was fire ants. - They can cross water by bunching together and basically becoming kind of like a pseudo solid. And then they can kind of like- - Yeah, so they can have, these ants can have as a colony have properties of a liquid or a solid

depending on the situation. - That's so dope. - And they were like, scientists was literally studying them to try and apply this to like real life metals and real life applications. And I'm just like, that sounds so fucking metal. - Can humans become liquid if we try hard enough?

- I'm solid Joey now, soon I'll be a liquid Joey. - I am solid Joey, but no, yeah. That's the weird nature videos I've seen every now and again. Did you guys watch a lot of nature videos? - Oh yeah, I fucking love nature documentaries. - I think, yeah, I think- - I grew up watching like, 'cause they used to just do like constant reruns of like every like David Attenborough documentary. - I suppose in fucking Australia. - Oh yeah, we love that shit.

- Go out and stand there and you'll see your local kangaroo fighting. - Now the other kangaroo clip was the one where the guy punched the kangaroo in the face. That one was all over Australian news for like two months. - Yeah, I remember that. - Where he's like saving his dog. - What's that about? - The kangaroo was like hitting the dog. - Yeah, he had his dog in a grip, like a vice grip. - How does that happen? - I don't know. The clip literally starts with the guy in his truck

like just calling out to the dog being like, "Oh no, fucking Terry," or whatever the fuck his name was. I remember what it was. And he jumps out and like the camera pans over and this red kangaroo, like fucking, you know, beefy motherfucker standing like two meters tall just has the dog in like a grip like this. And the dog's just like, it has the most like help face that I've ever seen.

and he squares up and the kangaroos fucking squaring up. And that's really dangerous because like, you know, one kick from this red kangaroo, like in the chest, that dude is dead. - Yeah. - A hundred percent. - Right.

But no, this guy's like the biggest mega chat on the planet which just goes whack and just socks him in the face and the kangaroos like, "What the fuck?" He looks around, he's like, "Nah." He just jumps away. And he saves the dog. But I think as well, the kangaroo felt threatened by the dog, I think. So the kangaroo also tried to kick the dog as well. So the dog could have died too. - What do kangaroos eat? What do they eat? - Grass. - Are they herbivores? - Yeah.

- But they're also very- - Pretty fucking strong for herbivores. - But they're also extremely territorial as well. - Is the picture I've seen of like jacked kangaroos, is that Photoshop or is that like real? I could never tell. I've seen it in memes. - Some of them are real and I'm sure some of them are like overdone, but like red kangaroos, which are like the biggest breed of kangaroos, like they like on average stand like two meters tall.

- I mean, Australia is like the most interesting wildlife. I mean, that's because it was like a, it was pangea on its own for like hundreds of thousands of years. So all these weird animals. - It was like one of the first ones to like break off. - Yeah, so it's had hundreds of thousands of years, but that's also why it's also like super delicate and why when they introduced foreign pests, it like completely fucked up Australia. Like they have a rabbit problem. Do you know about this? - Yeah.

but they can't kill the rabbits. You know why? - Why? - 'Cause people don't want them to kill the rabbits, but the rabbits are literally killing everything. - And everyone's like, "Oh, the bunnies are so cute though." And farmers are like, "Ah." - Yeah, like they...

They like eat everything and there's nothing left for like the, you know, because rabbits are like insane. They're like so good at like taking everything and fucking. - Like the British. - Yeah. - They literally, well, I think it was brought over by a British guy. - Of course it was. - Because a guy wanted to hunt rabbits in Australia. - In Australia. - So he brought over some rabbits. I could be incorrect on this.

Obviously rabbits are like very, very good at expanding. And so yeah, they had the trouble. And they've been trying to, they were gonna start culling them and getting rid of them. But obviously trying to pass a thing saying, hey, we're gonna murder a million plus rabbits. Is that cool with everyone? A lot of people are like, no, rabbits are so cute. We can't get rid of rabbits. But it's like, but our wildlife is, but rabbits are cute.

- That's a really interesting question of like, is it, you know, obviously- - Just because it's cute. At which point do you count something as a pest that needs control? - Well, I think when it's actively- - When it's like actively fucking up the natural world. - Yeah, that's the problem is that like the delicate ecosystem that Australia has because it's so susceptible to- - Yeah.

pests and stuff, I think the rabbit went crazy. And so many of the natural species. - What does it fuck up? What do the rabbits fuck up? - Well, they eat everything. They take everything. - They basically eat all the food that natural animals are supposed to eat. - Rabbits are only like,

from what I understand, like they are only limited by how much food they're eating. They can breed and make as many of themselves as they need to. It's just, is there enough food available? And they're really good at getting it as well. So like the, what are those fucking tiny rats with big ears and a tail in Australia? - Oh, bilbies. - Yeah, like those things eat shit compared to the rabbits. The rabbits like absolutely cream them and everything. And also rabbits, like rabbits eat their own babies. - Do they? - Yeah.

- Do they actually? - Do they? - That's metal as fuck. - Like rabbits don't give a fuck. Like everyone's like, oh, rabbits are so cute. Rabbits eat their fucking babies, bro. Well, you're gonna call something cute when it's like devouring its first born child. - It's like, oh, if I eat this one, I can just make another one. - Yeah, sometimes. - Yeah.

But the fact that that's even an option is like nuts. - I mean, let's be honest, humans are, let's not pretend like humans haven't done it, all right? We're not great. If we judge the whole species by one or two rogue rabbits, then maybe. - Okay, the one thing that doesn't make sense to me, I guess, is okay, rabbits are fucking thriving in Australia. They're like beating the shit out of Australian wildlife. Why is it not a problem in the UK?

- Well. - Because you guys don't have enough native animals. - Well, rabbits are, as far as I understand, they're native to the UK. - Yeah. - So the whole like ecosystem in the UK had been created with rabbits being in it for a very long time. - Yeah. - If I'm correct, can you Google this? Foxes, yeah. - We got foxes.

- But the foxes eat the rabbits. - Yeah, you need to have the balance, right? - I'm just finding it funny that rabbits can survive fucking Australia where you look at a spider wrong and you're fucking dead. And then like in the UK, foxes are like the biggest pussies of the animal kingdom. - Australia has a lot of species that are like, it's like the, you know, you're playing on the easy server.

It's like a lot of these, even though we know Australia is like one of these super scary animals with these snakes and stuff, they have a lot of species of animals that can only survive in Australia. And it's very delicate. - Well, like koalas, for example, only eat eucalyptus and a specific type of eucalyptus that's grown in only-

only in Australia natively. So that's why you don't see koalas in the wildlife outside anywhere else because they literally can't survive. Like in any other continent, like the animal probably wouldn't have evolved to just eat one type of plant that is very not popular. You know what I mean? Like you would have to adapt. Go on, sorry. I think you can actually eat a plant

- Yeah, so. - Okay. - But in Australia, they're like, "It's our territory now, baby." - If you introduce a species, there's a problem why these,

Obviously people didn't understand this in like the 1900s. We didn't fucking know what was going on. They were like, just bring my pets over. I'm sure it'll be fine. - What I understand is the argument of why we shouldn't be getting rid of these rabbits. It's like, oh, they're so cute though. Meanwhile, when the Australian government was like, eat the kangaroos right now. No one was like, but they're so cute. - Okay, this is also a common thing with cats. Cats are more often a very big pest in places. People don't want to get rid of cats because,

People have pets. They have cats. If the government is like, "Hey, you at home, are you okay with us killing all of this animal?" And you look down and you see that animal staring at you that you've loved and named and fed. You know what I mean? It's really hard. - So what you're saying is less people need to keep rabbits as pets. - No, no, no. - I understand. - What he's saying is rabbits have way too good PR.

- That is literally it. - That PR is too fucking good. - They're like the McDonald's of animals. They've got it down, right? You can tell them that McDonald's puts all the shit in their food. It doesn't fucking matter. People are gonna eat it. It's like, I understand both sides and I don't,

I empathize with both. I empathize with these poor, like these people who care about the natural wildlife who are like, we need to keep it the way it was supposed to be. I also understand why that person with 10 rabbits at home might not wanna have all of the rabbit population culled. I get both, right? Also another fun fact, while we're on fun facts about animals. - Go on. - Did you know, I love this. I was watching an episode of QI the other day and they talked about this.

Do you know why for the longest time they never gave the giant tortoise a genome, like an official genome name? - Why? - Do you know this? - It's a genome. - Like they could, you know how every name, every animal has a Greek name? - Oh, okay. - Right? - Right. - Do you know why they never gave the giant like turtle a name? - No.

They knew about this animal for a very long time. - Right. - Problem was- - These are the motherfuckers that can live like 300 years. - Yeah, exactly. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Problem was people couldn't stop eating them.

- They never ever made it back. - Oh, I did hear about this. Yeah, because every time they tried to ship the tortoise- - People would just eat them. - Yeah, it would never survive the journey 'cause they were too delicious. - So apparently through the, 'cause we don't eat it anymore obviously.

- Yeah, yeah. - 'Cause there's none left, they're an endangered species now, right? - So in the writing, right, here's the, it is literally like the perfect storm of unfortunate for the giant tortoise. So apparently in all of the documents left about the giant tortoise, it tastes better than any meat. - Yeah, damn. - It tastes better than lamb, it tastes better than beef, it tastes better than pork. Everyone like almost unanimously agreed who tried this meat agreed that it tasted better than all of them.

- Damn, I wanna try it. - Another unfortunate, evolutional part of the giant tortoise is that it also, this is just so sad. It evolved so that it could store up to like one gallon or one liter of water. I can't remember which one it was. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Inside of its body, almost perfectly like a sack.

So when you would eat it as a human, there was almost perfectly this one liter capsule of water. - So basically it came with a drink. - It came with a- - It's like a meal. - Imagine it, you've just had this, you're living at the time. - It's just a survival pack at the end of the day. - You're living at the time where beer was drank more than water because water was more often than not poisonous. It was hard to get a hold of in certain places. So you had this animal that tasted amazing

that was this perfect kind of like, it could store very easily. It was very easy to eat.

- A lot of the meat was edible in it as well. And it had this one gallon sack of water that you could just drink. So sailors would, when they would take them back, they were like, well, fuck, we're gonna eat it. Because not only was it delicious and amazing, they also had a free gallon of water they could drink. So it never made it back. - Wait, so does it have a genome now? - It did, it did after many, many years, it finally got one. - It's just food.

never survived the journey back to like the UK or something. - Wow. - So they could never- - Yeah, yeah. - That's just so good. It's really fucked up, but that's hilarious. - That's really funny. - Can you imagine it? You're just on the boat and you're like,

I just want to imagine the scientists waiting. They're like, all right, I want to see this animal so I can figure it out. What do you mean you ate it? They're on the port back. They're like, we're going to bring back 10. We're going to eat nine. We're going to let one go back. We all agree. One can go back. We only need one to name it. And then it's like one week left on the ship and they're like, oh, dude.

- Remember that flambé giant tortoise we had, dude? - It's looking kind of delicious right now. - I'm getting real parched. - It just makes me wonder how good must it have tasted. - Yeah, it must have been amazing. They just come back to port, they're like, "We brought 10 back, we got one. "How many shells we got?" "One, two, three." Fuck, we ate them all.

- Next trip guys. - This time we're gonna bring in 11. - The way they wrote about it was that it was so delicious that like it sounded like they genuinely just like couldn't resist eating it. But like imagine it's that delicious, we were like,

- Boys, you fancy just going for like a quick voyage to the islands to go and get some more giant tortoises and then just keep eating it every time. I'd like to think it was that good. They would go back to go and get more. - Me and the boys on the way to get giant tortoises. - Oh, dude. - It's an endangered species now, right? - It's an endangered species now, right?

- Oh, I thought it was just endangered. - We fucked up. - Okay, okay. - So it's kind of like the Dodo as well, right? - Yeah. - But like, I would rather, okay, I don't want us to extinct any animal, right?

- But I would rather as extinct an animal 'cause it's too damn delicious. Not that we wanted its horn or something. That feels so wasteful. If we're like, dude, we made an amazing stew out of the giant tortoise. Part of me is like, that's fucked up. But at least you used it. - At which point do you think like natural selection should just take its course? - Right, right. - Okay, I'm just saying. - You say like it's your fault for being born this delicious. - I don't know. I don't know. - He's got a point. He's got a point.

Why the fuck? This animal just was so unfortunate that it evolved to be the perfect like food for humans to eat. - You fucked up in some way in evolution by being super delicious, right? - And having a free sack of clean water. - You kind of are, you kind of are, right? They just didn't survive, obviously. - Again, every part of the tortoise was also edible. The marrow apparently was also delicious in soups and stuff. It was every single part of this fucker was delicious.

- This tortoise had evolved somehow to be so goddamn delicious. I don't get it. And I'm angry that I'm never gonna get to try it. - Yeah, I'm angry that I'm never gonna try it now as well. So I mean, I'm more angry that it's extinct

because I can't right now. - Listen, listen, listen, we care about nature or something, all that bullshit, but you know, the delicious animal. I mean, we've talked about eating possible dinosaurs and all the dinosaurs we might not possibly be able to eat, you know, like where's the Jurassic park episode where they bring back a extinct animal so they can just like serve as a delicacy, right? That's all I'm saying.

- We brought back the T-Rex because we heard flambéing this shit. - That's what Jurassic Park would actually be. It wouldn't be a, it'd be a restaurant. It wouldn't be a theme park. - It wouldn't be a theme park. It would be, come on, come on. If you bring back an extinct animals, there's gonna be that one fucker who's like,

- Me, I'm gonna be that. - So how do they taste? Come on, there's definitely gonna be a dinosaur restaurant somewhere in the world. - Of course, of course. You know, I mean, it's the turtle, it's unfortunate that it was perfectly evolved to be.

- The writing was on the wall. - I mean, there are some animals where I'm just like, without humans, you'd be fucking, you'd be on your last legs. - We saved you. You should be grateful, snow leopard. - How did pandas become China's national animal? Because isn't it like pandas,

- They don't fuck. - They do not fuck. They just refuse to fucking have offspring and fuck. And I'm just like, if you have an animal that just like does anything that is possibly could to willingly not fucking breed, at which point you're just like, maybe they just,

don't want to exist anymore. - Or the band is just like, we just want to die. - Could you stop? - Here's the problem with us as humans when I think it comes to us with extinct animals. The amount of shits we give about saving an animal is inherently tied to how cute it is. That is such a, I refuse to believe any other explanation. If you told us, oh, we have to save this one species of flounder, people would be like,

- We can live without a flower. - But it's delicious. - There's two things people care about. Is it delicious? - And is it cute? - And is it cute? - Right, like if a panda wasn't as cute as it is, would we care? - Probably not as much.

- We are so fucking biased. All the animals we wanna save are either cool as fuck or cute as fuck. - That is true. - Think about it. Think of an animal off top of the head that people are trying to help, like you see campaigns about and stuff, where the animal isn't cute or cool. - I mean, I don't know how, like I know, like the most endangered species I know are like pandas. - Cute. - Tigers. - Name extinct animals that are going extinct.

- Cool. - Cool, yeah. - Cool. - I mean, it's just any animal with good PR, right? - That's it. - Yeah. - But to get good PR, you need to be cute, right? - Cute or like badass. - Like if a species of snake was dying out, yeah, those snake people online would- - Snake people online? - You know who I'm talking about.

Most people wouldn't give a shit. Let's be honest. Like you're not gonna see the, like the fundraisers about it. I'm just being honest. Like that's how we are. We're so fucking biased as humans. We love to be like, oh yeah, save all the animals except the ugly ones. Fuck them, they can die. - Unless they're like exceptionally ugly, like the blob fish where it just becomes a meme. They're like, well now we gotta save it. - Now it's like, it's so ugly, it's cute. - Now I'm fucking cheering for it because it's the fucking underdog. Now look at him.

- Someone's gonna cheer for that. - He's doing his best. - We need to save the tooth fish and it's just a fish that is just like literally razor blades and like no eyes or face. You're like, well, no one gives a fuck if it dies. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm sure the scientists who spend their life researching this stuff will be very sad, but the general population doesn't care. Let's not pretend like we do.

- We don't, we don't. - We only care when it's already happened. - Yeah, I guess so. I mean like animals have been going extinct for the entire history of nature itself. - I'm not saying we should just let them go extinct. - No, no, no, I'm not saying that. I'm saying like, I feel like we should try to preserve nature as much as we can. - Of course. - We're not gonna be like weak mindset. - See ya.

- I think we should get rid of all the plants. We need more water parks. Fuck them, fuck the plants. - I mean like if humans have had like a direct effect on making this animal extinct, I think, yeah, we should take responsibility. We should be like, okay, yeah, we kind of fucked up their entire environment, their entire habitat. Let's try not to do that again, unless it's delicious, of course. - You think rabbits have this meaning?

Should we stop fucking? I don't think we're taking over a lot of things. No, no. Just enjoying it too much. Consume, consume. Fuck, consume. This episode is sponsored by ExpressVPN. Going online without ExpressVPN is like not having a case on your phones.

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This episode is sponsored by ExpressVPN. Watching Netflix without using ExpressVPN is like buying tickets to a Taylor Swift concert, but only being able to watch the opening act. That sounds horrible. As you know, a lot of content on Netflix is region locked. Luckily, we get all the anime, but I'm missing a lot of good old British TV shows. But thanks to ExpressVPN, that's a problem of the past. Because ExpressVPN lets you change your online location to wherever you want. Control where you want Netflix or other streaming websites to think.

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- Sucks. - What's the process around that? - Broom and running shoes. - In the UK, I think it's just to call a specialist. But I think a lot of people just take matters into their own hands.

- Yeah, we just take matters into our own hands. - Yeah, because like, I know I've had to see Sidney's dad deal with like a wasp nest being like just newly formed. And even that was just like, I am standing behind it's like six foot of bulletproof glass while I'm watching you do this because I'm not- - How do they deal with it? Do they shoot it? - That's the most American bugger. Not on my property. Get the shotgun.

- He had a broom, he had a broom as well. But he had a shotgun just in case. - There's no good reason to own an M16 unless there's a wasp. - I have seen like a video on YouTube of like Americans and I think they were Texans getting rid of wasps' nest with a shotgun. It went exactly how you think it went. - Oh shit!

Washed immediately come and attack Yeah No it's like Is there any like fucking animals That you fucking That terrify you That you'd see and you're like

- I think Australia's just conditioned me to be like, as long as it doesn't kill me, I'm not really afraid of it. - There's no like one particular animal or bug that scares me the most. But like, I mean, if there's a deer or a bear in front of me, yeah, I'm gonna be scared. We've already spoke about this. - Yeah, we are scared. - It's not so much me being scared of a lot of animals, it's just me being like creeped out or cautious about them, right? Like I'm not scared of a cockroach, but I'm not like, ooh yay,

- Yay little cockroach. I don't love it. - Yeah. - You know what's okay. One bug, not scary. - Okay. - Like 50 bugs together freaks me the fuck out. - Yeah, I'm actually the same. Like I fucking hate spiders. I mean, like only a few people don't hate spiders but I actually prefer like the bigger the spider is like the more comforting it is for me because at least I can see it. It never leaves my view. - It's easy to kill. - Right. - It is, it's like it's- - Get the shotgun.

- A large hit box. - Literally it's got like a large hit box, right? In case I wanna do something. Those fucking small spiders that scurry about, those are the ones that fucking keep me up at night. And I don't know why, I don't know why. - That's the one thing I don't miss about the UK. I had a lot of spiders in my house in Wales. - Are any of them poisonous though? - No, no, no. Just like, you just don't wanna see, like when they go under your beds and you've like lost them. - Weak mindset.

- It does suck when you see a spider go underneath your bed and you're like, I'm dead. - No, the worst one is when you're sleeping and you see it on the ceiling and you blink and it's just disappeared. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I've had loads of mice and rat problems in the UK. Have I told you about that? - No. - Actually, I think you have. - I've had rats in Swansea and I had mice in London.

- Right, what's the difference between a mouse and a rat again? - Oh, you know the difference. - Rat is like a huge mouse. - Rats are like, well, they're massive, dude. They're fucking disgusting. - Rats are like the mega chads. And the mice are just like civilians. - Mice aren't that scary, but mice are so fast. - Rats are fast. - Mice move at like the fucking speed of light though. And also the thing that sucks about mice is that they can like, no gap is too small for mice. They can fit through anything.

So they would go under the door. Even though the clearance is like this, they would like squeeze underneath. - They turned to a liquid form. - Literally, literally dude. I remember 'cause we were, it was so funny 'cause this Maisonette in London that was created, it was being touted as being rat and mouse proof. That was the whole point behind the building. And the landlord was extremely furious when I told him about it. I was like, yeah man, we got mice. And he's like, what?

I bought this place specifically 'cause I was told that it couldn't have mice. I'm like, well, we got mice. - How do you make a place mouse and rat? - It's not possible. I don't think it's possible. And so we had these mice and they always came out at night. I don't know if that's normal. I never saw them during the day. - Are they nocturnal? - I don't know. It was horrible though 'cause I'd be like in my bed watching Netflix, TV's there, door is here and I just see a shadow. - Oh shit.

- In my room. - Yeah, I've had that before. - And I was like, what the fuck? - It's so weird, we don't get mice and rats in Australia. - Might be too hot, I don't know. - Well, I think it's 'cause all the snakes are fucking here. - Yeah, true. - Yeah, right? - They get like fucked by snakes and stuff like that. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - Cats and stuff. And yeah, we tried all this expensive stuff for killing them. In the end, the thing that killed them the most was just- - Mousetrap? - The basic Amazon mouse trap.

It would clap their cheeks. - Don't fix something that's not broken, right? - I think the poison killed some of them, but we ended up just needing to like clog it. But the thing is they chew through everything. - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah. - And no matter what you clog it with, they get through it. Like in New York, the rats can chew through concrete. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Little by little, right? - Insane, it's insane.

- The one pest that like- - That's some Shawshank shit. - Yeah, the one pest that like terrifies me of ever getting is termites. I've never known anyone with termites. - We had termites. - It's not really a problem unless you have like a wood house though, isn't it? - Yeah, yeah, 'cause like my parents' place had like a termite infestation and it was scary because it's like, oh, the house might come down. - Yeah, right, like it's the one of the few pests that if you have it in your house and under the right conditions, it could just kill you.

- Yeah, because wooden houses in Australia mainly, right? - Yes. - Yeah. - How'd you deal with termites? Like what's the process around getting rid of termites? - When it comes to termites, you just have to call like a specialist for that. - Don't they just like gas the place? - Pretty much. They like smoke it out basically. - Right. - Yeah, but like, yeah, we had a termite. It wasn't like a massive infestation, but we were like, "Oh yeah, we should probably get rid of these now, because if they expand,

Yeah, the house is gonna come down. So fuck that. - That's fucking terrible. - It's so scary. - It's so sick that when they do that, when they just put gas all in the house, that's something that's so cool. - Well, why? - Why is that cool? - I was like, wow, they just put a tent over the house and gas it. I'm like, that's so badass. Who thought, oh, we're gonna kill these rats. Oh, we gotta use these rat poison. The guy's like, hold up.

"Boys, what if we gas the whole house?" - What if we nuke the house? - The first time someone suggested that, someone must've been like, "You're crazy." I was like, "No, no, hold on. "What if we put a big tent, a comically large tent, "around the house?" Someone's like, "You're a genius. "Let's try it." - How else are they gonna get rid of thousands of tiny insects just living in every single crevice of the house? - They're not gonna be like...

- It's either like the tent or the flamethrower. And I'm like, before we get the flamethrower out, maybe we should try the tent. - I think the one job on earth sort of somewhat related to this, not dealing with like getting rid of bugs and stuff, but you know people who clean houses after people have died? That's like the one job I don't think I could do.

- Oh, it depends how horribly they die. - Yeah. - Well, 'cause normally, you know, when you get older, you struggle to take care of yourself. So the house gets like really like, you know, fucked. And I saw one about Japan. It's so depressing. And it was just like- - It happens very often in Japan. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they go in and they're just like, "Well, we're just gonna take all this guy's possessions "and trash them and stuff." It's like, "Oh, that would break my heart, dude. "Just go into someone's house trying to figure out "like what their life was like and stuff." I couldn't do it.

- I mean, I guess, I mean- - You're like, oh, I don't give a fuck. - Bring in the trash truck. - I thought you meant people who had been brutally murdered. - Yeah, that's what I thought. - I was like, yeah, that's a pretty bad joke. - I mean, that's probably one part of it, but what if you're like a guy who couldn't take care of yourself, you're like 70 and maybe you couldn't make it to the toilet and stuff. - I don't know, I feel like- - And the room smells- - Just like shit yourself? - Yeah, but yeah, I mean, it happens. Like it happens. - Yeah, of course.

- I think that'd be like a fine job. - Can't say, I'll do it. - I mean, it's not a pleasant job, but I feel like it's- - Would it not freak you out just knowing that like someone was there and living there like a week ago? That would freak me out. - I think you'd get pretty numb to it after a while. - I feel like cleaning out all of their stuff, you'd just be like, oh, this is someone's legacy. This is someone's entire life. Why would it freak you out?

I don't know, just trying to figure out what happened. Like what was their life like? - I think that's super interesting. - Yeah. - Yeah, you get like a peek into someone's, not saying like this is like a glorious job or something, but I think, you know, if someone died peacefully of like old age or something and you're cleaning their house, I think that would be like a really interesting way to really like- - You can like piece together what they're like. - Piece together what kind of person they are. - You know, I'm thinking fortunately in the modern era, we have this peaceful ignorance that we think that

A lot of deaths are this like pleasant. He passed away with his friends and family, especially like Japan and stuff. It's like, no, like Tanaka-san died age 19 in his apartment and his family hadn't seen him in five years and he doesn't have any friends. And he's just a skeleton now. And it's, yeah, it's like, it happens. Because the video was like following this guy that I watched and he was cleaning it out. And it was just like, he was like, yep, it looks like you tried to make some food right before he passed, but he wasn't able to. And it's like, oh, fuck.

I'd mention... Heartbreaking, yeah. Imagine what a curry, dude. We all deserve that. We all deserve just a nice meal. Before the curry. Wait, so how would they die then?

- Well, you know, if you're getting really old and you're not, you know, and you're not able to make it to the toilet and stuff and you can barely get out of bed and no one's there to help you, you know, it can be really fucked. - Oh yeah, yeah. - Like, you know, one day your heart could just be like, I don't think so. And then just stop, you know? - Yeah, I mean, I think there are worse ways to pass away than that. I mean, it's, they died in the home and you know, I think that would be something where a lot of people wish

to pass away. - I think a worse job is like the people who have to clean up after like train accidents.

- Yeah, that would be traumatic for you. - That would suck ass. - Like to me, if I knew a guy died peacefully, peacefully of old age in their own house, I'm like, you know what? Death is never a nice thing, but if there was a way that I would want to go, it'd be like that. Just nice and peaceful in the comfort of my home. - Just like very quietly, just like reflecting on that person's life. Meanwhile, it's like, oh cool, this guy jumped in front of a train.

pick up his fucking pieces of his skull. I would much rather do the house job than the other one. - I know, I remember I stayed at an Airbnb once

And the guy running this Airbnb was like this old Japanese guy. He was like in his seventies or something. And it was like showing us, you know, giving us a tour around the house. And it's a bit morbid actually, but just like one block away from the house was like a graveyard, right?

And we had to walk through this graveyard to get to his house, right? And he pauses at one of the graves and he talks about, oh, this is, you know, my dad's here. My granddad is here. And I'm going to be right there. And me and Sidney go. He's always prepared. He's prepared. Cool.

- Cool, how'd you react to that? How'd you react to an old guy being like, "Yeah, I'm gonna be there in a few years." I'm like- - Why won't the student act? - Okay, I'm outta nowhere. - But I mean, I can't even begin to empathize what my thoughts would be like at that age. At what point do you just accept your own mortality and you just come to terms with it and come to peace with it. - I think that's kind of bad ass though to be like,

kind of facing reality and being like, you know what? I'm going to be there soon. I'm just going to enjoy life, you know, while I still have it kind of thing, you know? Yeah. He's pre-ordered. Yeah.

- He pre-ordered his gravestone. - He pre-ordered death. - He had like the space and everything. I was just like, oh, to me as a young guy, to me as like a guy in his thirties, that's like, dude, that's a bit morbid to me. But I mean, I don't know. At that age, I don't know how I'd feel. - Well, people in Japan like everything planned out.

- That's true. - They like everything to be predictable. They're like, "I wanna know when I'm dying so I can figure out how many crochets I need to do." - Okay, at which age would you ever consider getting life insurance? Right? 'Cause, okay, 'cause- - Isn't it when you get like kids you're supposed to? - Yeah, usually. - Or like writing a will.

It's something you never really think about. - But don't they say that you should write a will like in your twenties? - Yeah, I've been meaning to. - I feel like we're at that age group where we should have a will already. - Okay, here's the thing. I think it's when you have something

we're quite successful, we've done well. And so if you have some savings that could be of great help to your family members or something, fuck the government, don't give it to them. Make sure you know who in your family who gets it. So I think if you have anything worth giving to your family that is significant, you should do well at any age. God forbid something happens. God forbid. And to my sister, I give my entire body pillow collection. No.

- Nothing else. Do not touch the bank money. Who am I giving my YouTube channel to? I'm literally giving away clout. Who wants the clout on my YouTube channel? - I have already decided that I want the reading of my will to be a comical endeavor. So I'm gonna add the most stupid items to my will and be extremely specific with instructions just to get a good laugh from the grave. - Yeah, I don't know because like I don't have any brothers or sisters and I would hope

that i pass away after my parents so and i don't have any kids right now so at this point i'm just like when when when is there if that like awkward conversation or that awkward realization to be like i should write a will or i should look into life insurance because i don't know like i don't know about your parents but uh like i remember like a few years ago my parents told me that they had started writing their wills and i'm just like mom dad i don't want to think about

I don't want to like, I acknowledge it, but at the same time, just, I don't want to hear about it. - I mean, my dad just used to meme his will all the time. Like growing up being like, if I ever did like a good deed, my dad will be like, I'm adding that to the will. You get an extra item on my will. - He's like, yes. And my sister will be like, what the fuck?

What the fuck? It's like a fucking competition. It's like, who wants the, who wants the house on the wheel? Who's it going to be? Yeah. Cause like I told the story of how like I gave, uh,

of my dad, like my dad wanted like a car engine. And he's like, son, the entire record collection that I have was to your sister, but now it's under your name now. I was just like, yes. - I'd like to think your dad doesn't even have a will. He's just making shit up. - He's just making it up. - He's just saying shit as he goes along. - Probably. - But yeah, I remember I read somewhere, I think it was on like a Japanese program that they recommend that you should just write a will like as soon as you're just like,

- I think it's pretty cheap. I think any document and then you get it witnessed, I think. - Yeah, I don't think it's that complicated. I think it's just like going out of your way to be like, hey, I'm going to write about the moment after I've passed away and who gets my belongings. And before you think to yourself, you're like, I don't have any belongings worth giving away to begin with. Why would I write a will? - Well, my JoJo collection needs to go somewhere.

Who would you give that to? Who would you give that to? Would you trust one of your family members to do it? - I would trust the boys with my JoJo. I'd like to think that you'd keep on to them. - Thank you very much. - You'd treat them well. - Definitely not reselling that. - You can resell it if you want. I better get good price. It's my JoJo.

- Like on your deathbed, I'll be like, could you just like quickly sign this? - Hopefully my name won't be like worthless at that point. Maybe it'll be worth something, I don't know. - How do you go about like, what is the structure of writing a will though? That's what I've always wanted to know. Like, do you write it like a novel or like a letter? - I think you can be- - Can you write it like a poem? - I think you can be as playful as you want with it. You ever thought about doing a video will?

- A video, yeah. - What's up guys? Welcome to my will. So I'm dead. - Is that like the new YouTuber fucking trends? We've had apology videos. Now we just have- - Make sure to subscribe. Just kidding. You're not gonna get another video after this. - You've heard of, I made this video five years ago and uploaded it. Get ready for, I made this video when I was alive and it's probably where I died.

- I think that would be fucking cool. - Yeah. - I think that would be cool. - So if you're watching this video, I'm dead. - But also the payoff might not work if like YouTube like doesn't exist in like 60 years. - Or it's probably gonna be like age restricted and fucking banned off YouTube. Imagine that, imagine that. Someone like dies of like a terminal cancer. - You can play a video of a dead person on YouTube.

- Well, I mean, it's not you showing the fucking footage of you dying. It's like me now, age 20, I record something. I'm like, this is to be played. Not me like, bye guys, boom. It's not that. - I mean, the only closest thing I could think of was like the unfortunate thing of what happened with Etika.

And that got removed my YouTube. So I don't know, we've never had it before. So I guess we've never had like a president before of like what would happen. - There's these YouTubers who have died and the video is still up. I think that was a special. - But like, has there been a YouTuber who has recorded their like a goodbye video

- Right before they die? - No, no, no, like a goodbye video that would be uploaded post-mortem, you know? Does that make sense? - Without, okay, can I ask a more question? Are you asking that without the intention of then doing something very sinister? - Yeah, without the intention. - Like let's say they have like a terminal illness or something and- - Oh yes, there is. - There has been. - There is. - I'm sure there has been. - It's a powerful watch.

I don't think I could like, I don't think I have the heart to watch it. I don't think I can watch it. A guy was vlogging his cancer journey. I forgot the name. I wish I knew the name off by heart, but it's hard to watch because, you know, he's doing well at some points and then it's, unfortunately, it takes a turn for the worst. Yeah. And the last few videos he uploads are very painful. He's in like the hospice and, and,

And, you know, it's really, you know, I think that it was very rare that we had footage of watching that. But yeah, he was uploading a video and yeah, he unfortunately passed away. But all the videos are there and his whole journey's there. And it's very inspiring. But how cool is it that, you know, at least, you know, all of that is now documented forever. And that's just like out there for people to watch and be inspired by. I can imagine that a lot of people found comfort with it.

I mean, yeah, it's hard to watch. - Yeah, I don't think I could. - Yeah. - Yeah. Like, okay, this is going on a tangent, right? Because we are talking about terminal illnesses and stuff like that. Like, do you feel like watching that, you know, watching something like that happen in your eyes, in front of your eyes, do you feel like,

with how awful that situation is, that seeing that kind of thing portrayed in media so often has kind of like desensitized or desensitized you to like how awful that is in reality, just because, you know, the cancer patient or someone dying of cancer has been like used as such an,

a common writing trope in like every sad anime film and just like every sad plot point in general. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's, it's,

I guess until you experience it, right? Yeah. And it's someone close to you or even, you know, with yourself, you experience it. Like, I think it's impossible to portray it in an authentic way. I think though, just the sole fact that, you know, that trope has been used so many times in fiction and yet it still continues to draw emotion out of the viewer or the listener or whatever it is, right? Like people, like, you know,

Stories about the main character has a terminal illness, slowly dying, and it shows all that. First time you consume anything like that,

99% of people will like, you know, be very emotional. Like, yeah, cry. But it's interesting how you could watch 10 different shows like that and you'd probably still cry in the 10th one as well. Right. So I think like, even though it's been overused in fiction, I think just that is so powerful and potent enough that like, it'll just continue to like evoke some kind of emotion. Let alone if you yourself experienced that shit, like that is like,

That just adds onto it, I feel. - Yeah. - And I'm sure, you know, some people would be desensitized to it, sure. But I think at the end of the day, there's a reason why writers still use that trope. - I guess for me, like I went through like a weird experience where I had seen so many stories like this that there was a point where I got desensitized to the media where I was just like, oh, it's a character dying because of a terminal illness. And then I unfortunately experienced

a family member passing away because of something like this. And it was just like, it definitely grounded me in a way that I never, not that I never thought I would, I just like put things into perspective for me, right? And it just, I don't know, like it,

I haven't since, since that has happened, I've like actively avoided any stories around that because, because it seems way more, way more real to me. So I don't know how I would react to that. Like that part of the reason, for example, that's,

I couldn't watch "Clan" ads, right? I couldn't finish "Clan" ads. Was because at the time I was watching it, it just felt like cry porn. It just felt like cry porn where like I was like so disconnected with what was happening on screen because I'm just like, you know, this is,

this is key just trying to make me cry. It's trying to make me cry. But yeah, I don't know if I had a point. I just like, I don't know if I would react differently to watching those types of media now that I have grown up and I have more experience about, more experience about, you know, the real events that's,

I guess, influence stories like this. And if I would still feel the same way or if I would still be desensitized because it is a fictional story that has been told many, many, many times. - I think when it gets to that point though, it just revolves around how well written like those stories and characters are. - That's true. Because there are so many stories where they use that trope, but you're just like,

I know I'm supposed to feel sad for this character right now, but the writing is so mediocre that it hasn't given me enough emotional storage for me to care about this character. - That's true. - I think it's like impossible to replicate the feeling of going through it in real life, just because like, no matter how good the writing is,

you know, you're talking about something that, let's say it's a movie. Yeah. He tries to do it in two hours. Yeah. What would take essentially like a lifetime to build up. Yeah. Yeah. Like the reason it's so crippling in real life and it hurts so much is because if it's like your friend and then it happens at 20. Yeah. It's like, well, you have 20 years of being their friend. Yeah.

And now it feels like it's being robbed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I feel like it's almost impossible to portray it in a way that will give you the same emotion. I think it can give you a sense of empathy,

in a very deep way, but nowhere near can it like compare to the feeling that you might feel if you go through it, I think. - Yeah. - Well, I think one of the biggest, not issues, but one of the biggest hurdles between like communicating your experiences to an audience member or to someone who hasn't experienced the same thing as you is that there is like such a massive difference between sympathy and empathy

empathy like there'll be like there'll there'll be people i talk to and they talk about their experiences and i can definitely sympathize with the emotion that they're feeling but there's also a there's also like do you guys ever feel like a connection with someone who has actually shared the same experience with you like like the same emotional experience with you then there's like there's a connection there when you share that experience that cannot be replicated no matter how

how much other people would try to understand you and try to understand your feelings and anything like that. There is a feeling that cannot be replicated without the same empathy. And I don't know, to me, there's something special about being able to communicate that empathy through like fictional media, right? Because there are some times where I watch a film

And I feel something that's not just, hey, you should cry or you should feel this because this character went through that. It's, wow, I really feel like an actual connection with the creator now because he's portraying an emotion that I know

is impossible to depict unless you have been through that exact experience. And I'm trying to feel, I'm trying to think of when was the latest time? When was the latest time? I mean, off the top of my head, I think of like Evangelion, right? And like, why, why that's,

why I have such a close emotional connection to that. And it's so weird for me with Ava because I've watched Ava in several stages of my life. And the reason it's the most important for me was because there was a point where I felt like I was going through the exact same emotions the creator was. And this is going on like a complete fucking tangent, by the way. And yeah, I guess to me, that's why...

going on a different hand, going on a different hand. That's why media is like such a big, such a big part of my life and why I'm a fucking anime YouTuber, I guess, is because I, I guess that's what's like what I search for in media, which is not just to be entertained, but like this connection with a person and a creator. And that's why I try to make content. And, uh,

I don't know where to go from there, but that was- - Thank you for coming to my TED talk. - Thank you for coming to my TED talk. Wow. I mean, I guess this is where you go from talking about people dying from cancer, right? Where'd you go from here?

Yeah, I don't know. It's like, it's, you know, it's tough because like, I think the one like emotion that I personally feel when it comes to like real life situations and stuff like that, it's like, it's not, it's not even like, cause you know, when you're watching like media that revolves around like a death of a character, right? In any situation. Yeah. Most people think of like sadness, you know, like a depression or, you know, like some, some, like,

like rooted emotion. But like people who have experienced, at least for me, when I experienced like a real death that happened, like you don't feel anything. Like it's like you feel empty. And I think this feeling of emptiness is extremely difficult to portray in fiction. Because it's like, how do you try to show or evoke something

that is not an emotion. Yeah, yeah. You know? And it's like, because I remember like when one of my friends from high school, he unfortunately passed away very like, you know, suddenly from an illness. Right. You know, I had never experienced that. That was like the first time I had experienced death in a close, like a real death in a close vicinity. Yep. And like, it was so weird because, you know,

media and, you know, people who haven't experienced that would lead you to believe that like, you know, you go to a funeral. Yeah. And everyone's crying. Yeah. You know, it's like, and it's like, everyone's sad. But, and I thought I was the weird one because I didn't cry at his funeral. And I was like, am I weird? Am I being desensitized? Like, you know, like I should be sad. I should be crying. I should be grieving, you know, all that kind of stuff. And not to say that I wasn't. Yeah. But like, I think,

because I'd never experienced anything like that before. That's when I realized I was like, oh, I'm feeling empty. Yeah. Because that, because, you know, it's like, it's beyond sadness. It's beyond grief. And like, it was almost like this weird thing where like, I didn't start crying about his death until I got home.

And that's when it like hit. - That was the exact same experience I had with my grandma as well. Like at the funeral, I was just like, am I broken? Am I a broken human being? I feel nothing. - Yeah, it's like, I should be crying right now. Like you hear back on like, I was hearing back on my friend's life and like hearing speeches from my classmates and whatnot. And I was just like, why am I not crying? Am I weird? And then it's like, you grieve, everyone's sad.

And then I went home and I remember like, I went into my room and I lay on the bed and then I just broke down crying. Yeah. And it's like, oh, that's what that feeling is. And it's like, I personally have never seen a piece of fiction that can properly evoke that emotion. Right. Like it's, I don't know. It's weird to say like, it's not like it's faking an emotion or anything like that when it comes to fiction, but it's like, it's not...

- I wouldn't say it's like, it's not the correct emotion, I feel. And I think that's just because it's just so incredibly difficult to show that real emotion, especially when it's with a bunch of characters that you didn't spend your entire fucking high school life with, right? - Yeah, exactly. So like personal question, what's the most you've ever cried to like a piece of fiction at all? - The most? - Yeah.

Probably the second half of Clannad Afterstory. Like, the last, like, six episodes, I was, like, continual... Like, I was, like...

like episode like, you know, 14, 15, I'm obviously not gonna spoil it. Episode, like around like episode 14, 15 of "Clanet After Story", like something happens. And it's like, you break down crying and you think to yourself, okay, it's all out of my system. And then the next episode starts and it's just like, fuck man, why? And then it's just that for the rest of the episodes until it's over and you're just a fucking mess. - I just cried everything.

- There's a lot of future stuff that isn't even said I cry. - Like what? - I don't know, like just, Deku will be fighting in my hair and I'll start crying. If it depends on my mood, right? - Yeah. - Some days I'm like a fucking rock and it's like, it could be like the worst thing on earth and I'll be like. - It's really weird because I've found myself and I think this is healthy because I've found myself

more easily crying towards pieces of media and fictional pieces of media now than I did like five years ago. - Oh God, yeah. - Yeah, five years ago. - I would cry anything. - Yeah, and I think like the thing like, the one that broke the camel's back was like "Anohana." - I cried a lot "Anohana." - Yeah. - I think before "Anohana," I don't think I had ever cried watching "Anohana."

I'm trying to think. For me, it was weird. It's like very early on when I was watching a lot of anime. Like, you know, because I think I first cried at Clannad. And then it was just like a chain reaction of like, and then I watched Anohana and then I watched Air and then I watched all these shows that made you cry. Yeah. And then for a while, I had this blank period where I just- Because you exhausted yourself. Maybe. And then the one that broke the camel's back for me was Makia.

- Angel Beats made me cry. - Angel Beats made me cry, but I didn't cry. There was so many sad shows that people were crying. I didn't cry at the end of July and April, even though a lot of people did. - I didn't either. - Yeah. - I don't know. - And I was like, am I weird in that? Am I just overexposed to this kind of media?

And then I watched "Machia" on a fucking plane, tiny screen like this with shitty headphones. - Crying in one piece. - Yeah, and like crying to like three pixels. And I was like, and then the ending to that just like destroyed me. And I was like, why is it this one that made me cry after all this time? - It's weird because before like I would, anytime I would cry towards something, that thing would be like really, really fucking special to break down the brick wall that I am.

- The stone of a man, the obelisk known as Gant's emotions. - Exactly, but nowadays because I cry way more easily, I don't know, it's weird. Sometimes I have like empty cries where I cry and I'm just like, it's over and then I feel nothing. It's just like, I don't know, it's weird. - I'm like, I cry and I feel amazing.

- Yeah, right. - I just do it and I'm like, "Yeah." - I went to McDonald's the other day and I was like, "Why do they do this?" I cried and I just fucked up. - I fucking cried to Demon Slayer and I'm just like, "Why would I cry to- - I get it, I get it, I get it. - The moment I feel sad, I'm just like, "Bah!" - I just get it over with, man. I just do it. - Have you ever had those cries though where it doesn't feel like you've released?

where you just feel shittier. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Do you want to talk about edging with tears? - Not edging, but like you cry and then you- - It's not even climax with tears. - No, no, there's those times where you'd watch something really sad and then you just let the emotions out. And then after your tears have subsided, you're just like, "Hoo, all right, I'm glad that's out. I feel good. All my emotional baggage is out." And then there are some times where you would start crying and then once the tears have subsided, you're just like, "Man, now I'm more sad than I was before I started crying."

when I was like 15 with breakups, I'd cry and I'd feel worse. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Why did you leave me? Well, well, well. Ha ha.

- Getting back to funerals, I wouldn't, like even if I wasn't, you know, sometimes when you're like 10, you didn't really understand what's going on. And then maybe when you get older, you're like 15, 16, and it's like, oh, it's this person that you barely ever met, but you have to know 'cause you're all connected. You know, I wouldn't know them, so I wasn't like sad, but I would just like cry 'cause I'm like, why is everyone crying? This is so sad. - You cry because everyone around you is crying. - Yeah, 'cause if everyone else is crying around me, I'm like, fuck, well, I gotta do it now.

- This is human emotion, I must cry now. - Sad.exe. - It's something about being around people who like when a room is filled with sad energy, it just makes me get like that. - It depends for me, right? Because it's like, say for example, like the Demon Slayer movie, everyone was crying like fucking crazy at the end of that. And I'm looking around like, oh, oh, it's now. I have to cry now.

- I can't get the tears out right now. - No, no, no, no, like to me, if I cannot cry to a piece of media, if there's someone else in the room, like there is a- - I can't show the manly tears. - Sydney as well? - Huh? - Sydney as well? - Especially Sydney. - What? Really? - Do you know why? - 'Cause she'll be like, "Oh baby man, you wanna little cry?" - No, no, no, no, no.

- No, no, no, because like 10 minutes before the tears even start forming in my eyes, she's bawling her eyes out already. Sydney is so- - You're on clean up duty. - Sydney is so emotionally receptive that like she will start crying five minutes before the sad moments happen and she'll be like in tears. - Oh my God. - Yeah, like,

- Yeah, because yeah, if I'm watching with Sydney, I am on emotional cleanup duty. I'm like, "Oh, it's okay, baby, don't worry." I'm like, "Baby, I didn't even get my point." I didn't even like, yeah, I guess you can't really be like, "Oh baby, are you okay?"

- You've heard about relationships where the guy comes too fast and then it ruins it. What about the one who cries too fast? I can't get my tears in. She's already decided it's over before I've even started. - Yeah, 'cause like I remember, 'cause like your name, I cried like a fucking baby the first time I watched your name and it wasn't even because it was,

- Sad? Your name was to me, the reason it's one of my favorite anime films is 'cause to me it's like the perfect cinema experience where there are so many things happening on screen that there's like so many emotions.

that I just get so absorbed that my body doesn't know how to react other than just crying. Sometimes I get emotional and I don't know what to do with it and I cry. - That's like an overwhelmed cry. - Yeah, it's like an overwhelmed cry. - The music normally does that for me. - Yeah, yeah. - I fucking cry like an eeky, I don't know. It's always the music. - First note to Black Parade. - Where is the music? Did the music make me cry then?

Like my hair academia, I don't know why I tear up whenever I fucking hear you say run, but like I keep screaming. I'm like, why, what's going on? - Yeah, I don't know. - It's like I've been programmed to like a certain tune. I'm like, - It's like Pavlov. - Yeah, I literally like, I'm like, dog. - And so I remember second time, 'cause the first time I went by myself. - Sorry, Mark Zuckerberg, by the way, watch this.

I know you don't really like these segments. I know you can't relate to this, sorry. - So the first time I went by myself and the second time I was like, "Sidney, you gotta see this film. "It's fucking amazing film, better come see it with me." And I remember it was the moment just before Radwimps start playing. And that is the moment where I start crying. I remember sitting in this film and it was the second time I was getting as emotional, I was getting as into it. I was like getting absorbed and I'm like,

It's coming. It's coming. Radwimps are about to play. And then like, on like a minute before, like they start playing, I'm just saying,

- Like next to me, I'm like, oh God. And it like, it just took me out. I'm like, of course it's Sydney bawling her eyes out. But yeah, that's why as much as I love Sydney, if I'm watching a sad thing, if I want to have an emotional release, I cannot watch it with her in the room. - Shut the fuck up. - I'm like, Sydney, can you stop being emotional for one second? - Did you watch his new movie?

- Is "Weathering With You?" - Oh, "Weathering With You." - Yeah, "Weathering With You." - "Weathering With You." Yes, I did watch that one. - Did you cry? - I did not cry that night. - Did you cry at, who's the other director who's good? - Manro Hisoda. - Manro Hisoda. - What's his, "Belle"? - I thought "Belle" was okay. It was, did you say it was mid? - Okay, his, I watched it by the way. - You watched it? - I haven't seen it yet. - What did you think of it? Okay, did you watch it in cinemas? - No.

- Okay, I feel like that's a movie you have to experience in cinemas because everyone I've talked to who has seen "Belle", right? They've talked about how it's like a fucking incredible cinema experience with like the sound and the music and like,

There are definitely scenes in "Belwood" I'm like, I get that. It feels like, especially with like the musical scenes, the musical numbers, it feels like these scenes were made to be experienced in a theater with like the surround sound and everything. In terms of the plots and everything else, it was not his greatest movie, in my opinion. - Was it one of those movies though that it was like cry bait? - Yeah.

- So it was like the, yeah, because that's the thing. - I felt like you didn't earn it. - Right, but that's the thing is like, sometimes it's so weird with fiction that is like,

obvious cry bait. Where it's like, sometimes it's like, yes, I will buy into the cry bait very happily. Thank you very much. And then there are other times where it's like, okay, you don't have to push this in my face this much. Like I'll cry when I want to cry or if I can cry. They have a digital world in the show and a movie. So I just, I just wasn't invested in this world. I just didn't think it was like, I couldn't see it being,

being a thing or why people would care. I get it 'cause it was like, we're just gonna make an online world where you can be anything except you can't and your avatar is chosen for you and also there seems to be like a class system where some people are more important than others in this world. - Why does that just sound like some world? - And I was like, this is just like- - It is exactly some world.

- Oh, okay. - I was like, how do you know it's a whole set of "Memora" movies? - He's made the same movie again with "Beauty and the Beast" this time. - Yeah, it was "Beauty and the Beast." That's what I was also like. What's this? I wasn't, that was okay. - It was okay. I agree with you. - You know what I watched in the cinema? - What? - "The Batman." - Oh, how was it? - Very, very good. - Really? - Have you watched it yet? - No, no, yeah. - Is it three hours? - Yes. - Okay. - And I loved it. - How was Robert Pattinson in it?

- Delightful, just a treat. What a great guy. What a great guy. - What a bloke. - I saw him in the other day. It was like 2010. It was like women like fawning over Rob Pattinson. It was like 2020, men fawning over Rob Pattinson. It's so true, dude. - Hell yeah. - It's good. It's a good movie. - Is it a good movie or is it a good Batman movie?

I think it's not that much for a Batman movie. - Really? - I'd give it an 8.5 out of 10. - Because I'm like one of the weird people who really don't give that much of a shit about Batman. I don't know, to me it's just- - I really liked this portrayal by Rob Pattinson in Batman. - Is it kind of more like on the Joker side of like,

storytelling or is it more like a Batman Beans type of If that's the scale that we're going with I guess it would lean more towards the Joker side but I wouldn't compare it to the Joker either it's more like they clearly want to tell Batman as a character through this kind of somewhat realistic lens of like if Batman was a real person he would be a fucking weirdo

like more like a human drama side of things. - Well, it's yeah, it's a kind of detective movie, but also, you know, they don't shy away from showing Batman as being having a lot of issues. - Yeah. - Like the man's got problems. - Yeah, yeah. - You know, and- - More money, more problems. - Yeah, dude. And I liked the villain. I thought it was pretty good. - The Riddler this time. - The Riddler, yeah. - Oh, it's Riddler. Oh shit. - I thought they did a good, really interesting take on the Riddler that I liked.

I just had fun. Like I was there for three hours, maybe towards the end I felt like I could have hurried up a little bit. But overall I wasn't bored. I really enjoyed it. I had a great time. - I'm interested to see what Riddler is like in a movie of that caliber, right? Because to me, the Riddler is Jim Carrey.

- It's literally the opposite. - It is opposite, okay, okay. - I think you'd both like it if you watched it. - I'm sure I would, yeah. - It's a great cinema experience. - The thing that's always wondered me about "The Riddler" is how the fuck would that work in the age of Google?

Like the riddle comes up with like a riddle or something and Batman's like, hold on a second. Okay, I got the answer now. I got the answer. - I think I saw that in the Buzzfeed article once. - It's like the one YouTube short that he like watched the other day. And he's just like, I remember that one. I know the answer to that one. - Fuck, I would look it up. I was showing on TikTok, but the algorithm's so shit. - The only issue with the movie is that I wish Robert Pattinson was just out of the costume more.

- He's just so good. - Does he do like the gravelly like, "Oh, man." - Oh yeah, he does, yeah. - Oh, okay. - He's pretty good at it. - Oh, okay. - He's just really good at doing voices in general, actually. - He's just a good actor. - He's a good actor. - Right? Definitely. - I watched "Good Time" again after I was like, "You gotta watch 'Good Time.' It's so good. Please watch 'Good Time.'"

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- Has there ever been a Batman that I thought was interesting? 'Cause before the, okay. I feel like before the Dark Knight Rises, Batman just had like an awful streak of just bad movies and that just made his- - Just DC in general. - Yeah. - You don't like the George Clooney Batman? - Well, with the fucking bat credit card and the fucking bat nipples and all that fucking shit.

- Even the best thing about that was fucking Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mr. Freeze. - Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you. - Yeah, I just feel like for the longest time, Batman was just either a boring or comical character to me. And the most interesting characters were the villains of Batman.

And the only time I thought Batman was an interesting character was actually during the animated series. Like that was like, that was peak Batman for me. - Yeah, yeah, definitely. - Have you seen the animated series? - Yeah, I love the animated series. - How does this compare to like the animated series then? 'Cause that to me, that is good Batman. - It's a different experience though entirely. I feel like it's hard to compare them both when they're both trying to do wildly different things. I think, but that's also so good 'cause Mark Hamill as the Joker in that is amazing. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So good.

- I don't know. I don't feel comfortable comparing it almost. I feel like it's not fair. - It's apples and oranges. - It's not a fair fight. I think you should just watch it. You won't regret it.

- Just watch it. - Conclusion, watch it. - Genuinely, like it's definitely like- - This is just Connor talking about media in general. Connor, sell me on it. - Just watch it. - No, there's a lot of stuff I'll tell you not to watch. I don't think it's worth your time. This however is worth your time. - Did you play the Batman Arkham games as well? - I loved the Batman Arkham Asylum game, dude. - Oh my God, a story based game that you played? - It was hardly story. The combat was fun and punching and exploring was fun. - That's true. - I don't know what the story was. I know Joker was-

- God damn it, I thought we had one thing in common for once when- - He's got goopy gamer brain. - Yeah, goopy gamer brain. - I liked it and there was also the combat trials. That shit was fun as fuck. - You did the combat trials? - Because I was addicted to getting all the achievements on Xbox. - Wait, you did side stories? - Well, no, so I was obsessed with gamer school.

That's like the last thing I do. Like if, I hate it when there is like a fucking, when there's a point in the game where you can like do a trial for the combat or one of the game mechanics. I'm like, get the shit out of my face. - No, me too, me too. - Yeah, okay. - Unless there's achievements. - Well, okay. - So you're an achievement hunter.

I was. I was an achievement hunter. So here's what happened, right? When I first got my Xbox and I discovered these achievement things, I thought, oh, that's pretty cool. That's a pretty cool thing to strive towards. And then my friend was an achievement hunter.

And I was like, I wanna be better than him at this. And so I was like, well, I'm gonna start doing it. And then I got kind of addicted to it. And I would research games that were easy to get all of the achievements on and then buy them and do them just to get the achievement score. I had like 60,000 gamer score or something. You could only get about a thousand a game normally. But you got DLC for some stuff as well. I bought Lost the game.

Like this TV show lost specifically because you could get all the achievements in like two hours.

- Really? - Yeah, I don't know why. - So you just speed ran it? - I was absolutely addicted to getting these achievements and Arkham Asylum was one of them I got 100% on. And it was really hard because you had to do one of the trials and maintain a combo of like 100 or something. I can't remember what it was. I remember it took a lot of attempts. - But you also had to collect all the- - All the Riddler trophies. - All the fucking Riddler trophies. - Did all of that. And there was also like, you had to do all the stealth missions perfectly as well or something like that. I can't remember exactly. I remember it was really hard getting all the achievements, but that was such a good game.

- I didn't mind doing it. - When's the last time you did that then? - Achievement collected? - Yeah, yeah. - Not since I was like 18, 19. When I went to university and I had less time, kind of realized that like, wasn't that fun? - It's not fun at all. It's not fun. - I had gotten one of the hardest achievements on Xbox. - Right. - Which is like staying alive on "Dead Rising". - Oh, for seven days straight? - Yeah. - Yeah. - You did that? - No, not that one. It was another "Dead Rising" one. Not the seven day one.

- What makes it so hard? - Wait, that's on the first game, right? - That's Dead Rising one, yes. - I've done all of them on Dead Rising two. - Oh shit. - Which is I think, no, they have like kill 1 million zombies or something stupid. Sorry, not the three days one. My mom would have killed me. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. That one was you had to be alive in like hardcore Dead Rising endless for seven real days.

Like in the real world. How did you get that? What was the other one? You have to go in shifts, surely. What was the one I did on... All of them on Dead Rising 2 are really hard. I remember that took so long. That's just like a difficult game. Yeah. There's some games that... You know what? Oh, maybe this is why I hate JRPGs. JRPGs always had the hardest achievements. Yep, they did. Hands down. The most...

And they had the most cruelest ones where like, get this item that if you miss it, you can't go back and get it. Fuck you. So that's, I think that is what genuinely stopped me from ever buying a JRPG for a long time. - 'Cause like people have to be psychopaths. - You do. - You have to be psychopaths. - You do. - I'm looking at you, Joe. Well, to be fair, how many times did you have to like play "Persona 5" before you 100% did that? - Like six times. - Yeah, exactly. - But I also 100%ed "Final Fantasy VII Remake" as well.

- Well, that one's not too bad, I guess. - That's not too bad, yeah. - Because I feel like that's like a third of like the original game. - Yeah, exactly, exactly. I wouldn't dare deal with the original. - Oh no, no, no. - No, no, fuck that. - I feel like they've become a lot more accommodating in these modern times compared to like OG JRPG games where they assume that that's the only game you're playing for the entire year. - Yeah, they just assume that's the only game you have on that console.

- I'm just gonna last you the entire fucking time. - Exactly. - I'm trying to find my Xbox profile so I can see what I've done. I think it's this one. - Isn't the hardest Xbox achievement the fucking Mega Man 9 one? - What's that one? - What's that one? - It's the one where you have to beat the entire game without getting hit a single time.

- Oh, so that's just a no hit run, but an actual achievement. - Yeah, which if you've played any Mega Man game is practically impossible. - No, what's the game? One of the Tom Clancy games had an achievement for being the number one ranked player in the world. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - No joke. - I remember, I think I saw like a WatchMojo video a long time ago, which was like the top 10 hardest Xbox achievements. - I was like top 10 list of games I'm never gonna buy. And one of them I already owned, it's like Gears of War. So it was like good to get.

like a hundred thousand online kills in the first game. But like no one was playing the first game after like the third one came out. - How would that even be possible? Like how much, you know, how many hours? - How many hours? - A thousand matches with your mates. - Right, right, right. - No, no, it's kills. So you have to be averaging like fucking hundreds. - It's ridiculous. - Yeah, yeah. - And Gears of War is not an easy game to get kills in. - Yeah. - So it's very difficult. I can find this, I can find it.

- All right, I've got the list of all of these. Some of these games are just fucking stupid. I have 51,000 gamers score on Xbox, right? - That's like what, 50 games, 45 games? - Every single COD game, I have every single achievement. Every single Halo game, I have every single achievement, except for the newer ones like Halo Wars 2 and Halo Infinite. I have all of them. I did all of the, I don't know, did you ever do Halo?

- There was those challenges where you had to like do certain things without dying, like the skull ones. Did all of those. - I only played Halo 1. - I've only played Halo 1 and Halo 3. I didn't play Halo 2. - I got every single achievement in Blue Dragon.

- Blue Dragon? - Yeah. - The JRPG? - Yeah. - Oh shit. - Yeah. - I remember you were talking about that. - Yeah, yeah, right? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think, what's this one? What's the most rare? What's the rarest one? Head trauma. - Every type of melee weapon on the zone. - That's so weird. There's like rarity. - That's a lot in Dead Rising. - Yeah. - Everything is a weapon. - I've killed, yeah, okay. Some of these are like really low. Some funny games I've done. "Doritos Crash Course 2."

I got all of the achievements on Doritos crash course. - Why would you buy that game? - It was free. - No, the other question is why is there two of them? - Yeah, it was really popular. I've got all the achievements on Red Dead. I think that wasn't too hard.

What else have I done? What weird games are these? - So like, would you basically do nothing? Would you basically do nothing until you 100% of these games? - Yeah. - South Park games. - I played the South Park tower defense game, lost. I have Terminator Salvation, which I think I got 'cause that was easy. But then it turned out to be really fucking hard. What's weird? What other games do I have here? God, most of these are cards in Assassin's Creed.

- Happy Wars. - I don't even know what that is. I didn't even do that one. That must've been too hard. - Wait, hold on. What was the one after that? Guacamelee Super Turbo Championship. - Dude, that was a good game, dude. That's a good game. - Guacamelee. - And then other games I couldn't do them all. There are quite a lot of games actually. A lot of the Gears of War ones were just like fucked. - Yeah. - Forza, Destiny. Fuck, dude. I played some weird ass games. What's wrong with me? - Well, I think as a kid, you just played any game that you could get your hands on, right? - Yeah, exactly.

And now they're like, FIFA, of course, of course. You have one achievement on FIFA. I don't know why, FIFA 09. I got all the achievements on Halo Wars, which one of them included getting to the highest rank, which takes like an absurd amount of hours. Jesus. Stupid amount of hours. Yeah, I mean, I don't think I've ever got addicted to a game that much that I wanted to 100% it. No way.

- 'Cause I think the closest I've come actually, surprisingly is "Tales of Arise" like which was last year. - Oh, oh shit. - It's the first time where I actually did the fishing mini game. 'Cause you know how every game has a fishing mini game. I was like, what fucking loser plays the fishing mini game? And I'm like,

this is actually pretty fucking damn fun, collecting all the fish. But yeah, I mean, recently I've been playing Horizon Forbidden West. I'm like the one fucking person 'cause everyone's playing Elden Ring right now. And I'm like, I'll get to Elden Ring eventually after I finish Horizon Forbidden West. And yeah, I mean, it's- - Is there a fishing mini game in that one as well?

- I don't think there is. I was like, I was like- - You're like, "God, I wish." - Can you fish in Elden Ring? - I think so. - I don't know. We're not like Dark Souls or like Soulsborne. - I'd like to think there's fishing. In an ideal world. - We need a Twitter account to be like, "Yes, you can fish in Elden Ring." - I felt like it's just every JRPG right there you can fish. - Yeah. - It's like a staple. - I don't know how that, why did that become a trope? - Because Japanese people love fishing. - Do they? - We love fish.

- Okay, they love eating fish. That doesn't necessarily- - They don't like catching it though. - A nation of fishermen. - By the same logic, should we ask Brits, should you love fishing? 'Cause we're a fucking island nation as well, right? - We're shit, we don't eat fish. We're fucking idiots. - You got fish and chips. - That's it. - We eat cod. - We want fish and like salmon if you're rich.

- Yeah, why is that? Why is that? Not only why is there a fishing mini game in every JRPG, but why is it that 99% of them have no effect on the main story whatsoever? - It'd be pretty shit if you're fighting Sephiroth and you're about to fight him and he's like, "Sorry, you haven't collected all of the 19 different species of fish. You are not ready to face me." It's like, well, yeah, I guess that would be weird. - I think I want a JRPG where you're actually rewarded

at the final boss. The bar is like, "You've done the fishing mini game?" - How did you know that sea bream scales are my weakness? - They start with like half health. - Oh, where's my health bar gone? - I know some people who are like deadly addicted to like every fishing mini game in JRPG. I mean, Alan is that guy. Alan is that guy who boots up

and then he spends like the first 10 hours on the fishing mini game. And then after he gets bored of that, then he actually goes play the game. - Alan's that guy who actually does the Mahjong mini game in Yakuza. Because let's be real, every Yakuza player is like, don't mess with us. We don't know how to play Mahjong 'cause no one fucking does that mini game in the Yakuza games.

- Well, isn't like the mini games, the main game in Yakuza? - Yeah, exactly. - Right? - Except the Mahjong mini game, 'cause no one knows how to fucking play it. - That is until you come along and play Yakuza. - And then I'm like, let me show you. Let me show you how to do it. - Yeah, how's your Mahjong coming along, Joey? - Really good. My addiction is growing. - You're speed running, old Asian man. - Yeah, I am. I am. I went to a Mahjong parlor for the first time the other day. - Oh, how was that? - In Ebisu. It's really fucking fun. I mean like,

I think that the general stereotype of a mahjong parlor is like, it's fucking dark. It's like smoke is everywhere. Like basically fucking Akagi, right? But like I walk in and there's, I've never seen that many lights on in one room. Like I came in, I was like,

- Oh fuck! - It's so bright and like no one's smoking in there. Like a lot of really young people as well. Like there was maybe like two tables that had, you know, older gentlemen and everyone else was like around our age. - Was it all men? - No, surprisingly like half of them, I'd say like half, maybe 40% were ladies. There were like a couple of tables where it was just four ladies just sitting around. But yeah, I went in, I went with like one of my childhood friends

because he's been getting into mahjong as well and he was like oh we're gonna go to this one in Ebisu and I was like why this one in particular and he's like the fried rice here is fucking lit

And I was like, so we're gonna go play mahjong or are we gonna go for the fried rice? - You get fried rice with the- - Yeah, you can order food there. And to be honest, probably some of the best fried rice I've had in Japan. - Nice. - While playing mahjong. - I believe it. It feels like the kind of place where you get a weirdly good meal. - Yeah. - Where did mahjong get this image of it being like a game for old guys or old people? - 'Cause it's always old people playing it on like the street and like betting.

- Is it? I never see that. Like normally, like my entire image of Mahjong comes from media basically. 'Cause before like before moving to Japan, I'd never, I guess I'd never seen anyone playing Mahjong. - I know you're getting this right. POV, you're watching a movie, right? It's a spy movie. Let's say a spy movie or any kind of movie. They're undercover in...

- Indonesia, let's say. Do they play Mahjong in Indonesia? - Yeah, South Asia is pretty popular. - All right, so they're playing, let's say they're in Indonesia on a mission. Oh no, their cover's been blown. We're gonna start running through buildings, charging the one building. Oh, it's a food store, chicken everywhere, running to the next room. Oh God, it's a bunch of old people playing Mahjong. You've seen this scene like 500 times. - Yeah, every time. - 'Cause it's always just old people in a smoky room playing Mahjong. - Every Jackie Chan movie. - When they bust through the thing and they keep running through, it's always that.

- Always. - And then they always do some kind of corny one way or another, right? As they're running out of the room. - Well, it's either that or it's like an old like- - Indistinct Asian shouting. - Yeah, it's always like an old Kung Fu movie. And you get into like bad guys layer. What's he doing? He's sitting down playing Mahjong with his fellow, with these guys asserting dominance, right? That's like the image I have of Mahjong. Like in that,

- Well, it's like, I feel like it's like the poker of Japan or like poker of Asia really. - Yeah, definitely. - It's like the kind of game where gambling is not legal, but me and the boys can have a little wager or two. - Yeah, just under the table. - Have you guys ever played bridge before? - No, I'm not 90. - Yeah, exactly. - I've heard of that game. What is that? - That's a game which I don't know. - Is that a card game? - It's a QI.

- It is a card game. I don't know what the image is. I don't know if it's like famous outside of the UK or anything like that. - Oh yeah, it's famous in the US. And again, for being the thing that people play in retirement homes. - Old people play it, right? And like, I remember, I think it was in like high school or something. One of our teachers for like this, for like, you know you have a free period sometimes and it's the end of term. You can do whatever you like. So this teacher decided to teach us bridge.

Just teach us the rules. And I got like, I got like addicted at a point where I'd like joined the bridge club. Yes. I was, I was that kid who actually joined the bridge club. Cause like it had this image of like Mahjong being what old retired people play in retirement homes. But like, it is fun as fuck. Right. Like it's, it's kind of similar to Mahjong in a sense where you get given a bunch of, you know, it is, it is kind of like poker where it is like,

luck based but it's also skill skill based but what i found most interesting to bridge is that it's it's a team game right so the basic concept is before each game you have a partner who sits like opposite you right and you basically have to make a bet on how many how many points you would be able to get in the hand you're about to play so you're like kind of communicating with your partner and communicating and trying to like

what everyone has by the bets that they're placing. And I thought that was like, I think that's like super genius. It's basically like Uno, but before the Uno game starts, you have to try and guess what everyone else has. You're working in a team. And yeah, like to me, I wanted to talk about it because like Bridge has this image of being a,

boring game that all people play, but I think it's like interesting as fuck. And I haven't played bridge since I was in school when I was in bridge club. But yeah, I got super addicted for a while because I think it's a genuinely fun game. - Yeah, it's the same with Mahjong, right? It was like, before I started playing it, I was like, no, I'm not gonna get into this. This is what my grandma was into. But then when you actually start playing it, you realize just how like intricate it is. And it's not just like a fucking, you know. - Well, I don't think it was an old people thing. I think it was like a really complicated

- Yeah, but it's interesting though how even something like Mahjong, which is a very complicated, deep and very mind intensive game is associated with old people. If you look at the pro scene, for example, most people are like dudes and chicks in their 20s. - It's like chess in the parks in New York. All the old dudes are playing chess.

while playing it, but it's the young people who are the best in the world. - It's a PR thing, right? When are we gonna get like, you know, a Twitch category? - Everything's a branding issue with you, isn't it, guys? - Yeah, yeah. - 'Cause I- - Well, I- - Everything can't be fixed with a bit of branding and PR. - Yeah, remember like literally just two years ago where chess had the same thing, and then suddenly chess had a fucking second renaissance,

with the explosion it's had on Twitch. And now it's seen as like this cool thing. - Mahjong's next. - Mahjong's next. - I'm gonna call it, Mahjong is next. - You know what I wanna learn? - VTubers are already on that shit. - Yeah, yeah. - That's the secret. We need to get the VTubers to all start playing it. - The Japanese VTubers have been on that shit for so long. - Yeah, right? - I think, yeah, weirdly chess is one of those sports where when you look at it on paper, it just shouldn't be a spectator sport. Like everything about it makes it,

almost a bad spectator sport. There's long gaps in between moves. It's not that...

Storylines are a little harder to get across. And it's visually not that exciting. You look at a board for like 15 minutes at a time. If you're lucky, they'll make a move every 15 minutes in the World Championship. But somehow, I think just out of pure, like being a very solid and ubiquitous game, it's managed to somehow carve a good niche and a pretty strong one. But also chess has also had great success by having the branding of being the smart landscape.

The smartest of smarts play chess, Jonathan. I think the problem with chess as a spectator sport is that with a lot of sports, right? You look at the higher level players. You look at traditional sports like football, basketball, maybe even league or whatever. And you can like...

You can even, even as a normal person, you can appreciate the skill being shown. You see someone doing a speed run of Mario 64 or something. You're like, damn, those are some- - No words needed. - Yeah, no words needed. That's fucking speaks for itself. But like me watching,

a high level chess game like the chess world championships is like, I've never understood the feeling of that side character in Dragon Ball Z where like the characters- - Explains the moves. - Yeah, yeah. Where like the main characters are following the fight perfectly and you just see like, you just see nothing. This is me watching high level chess, you know? - That's why I think chess has gotten really good in recent years at having,

kind of what a lot of e-sports are doing and what traditional sports are doing for a long time, where one of them is the one that's saying what's going on and one of them's helping add color and break it down and explain it. And chess has been really good at that recently. 'Cause I mean, I like watching the world championships, but even then there are periods when nothing happens for 20 minutes and it's like,

- Shit to do man, like come on. - Yeah, sometimes I get like, I get recommended like a clip of Magnus Carlsen streaming or something like that. And it's just like an out of context clip of like this fucking 500 IQ move. And then the move happens and I don't even know it's happened. Because it was like five moves ago that he reacted to it. And like, I remember, I think one of the funniest videos I've seen is just like, I can't remember the exact video, but it's a,

it's a parody video of someone commentating on a Magnus Carlsen stream and it's just like a normal person commenting on his stream and it's just like and Magnus Carlsen leaves his knight hanging is he going to take it is the opponent going to take it no he doesn't take it he doesn't take the free knight oh now he's left his queen hanging is he going to take the queen Magnus the queen is right there no he doesn't

take the queen and he looks like he's in an awful position right now and he resigns, Magnus Carlsen resigns. I don't know what's going on. And it's just, it's exactly how I feel watching a high level chess game when I'm just like, there is a hanging queen right there. Why is Magnus Carlsen not taking the hanging? Oh, and he just resigned for no reason. And he scrolls to the comment section and it's never the top comment that's explaining what's happening. It's always like buried a few comments down. Just be like, can someone just,

Explain to me what I just witnessed, please. But yeah, I mean like that's why one game I really wanna get into, as it sounds super interesting, it always looks super interesting to me, but I'm fucking terrified of possibly getting into is Go. Go seems to me like that is just like chess is complicated by itself. Go to me, even just the concept of Go, it seems like what like viewing

- A bottomless pits that you cannot see the end of. - My granddad was into Go and he was really good at it. And he tried to teach me when I was in high school and I was like, I don't know what the fuck is happening here. I know you're showing me the ropes really nicely and kindly, but all I'm thinking is, ooh, black and white stones.

- All I know is that Google documentary about the AI they built to beat the best player. - And then I read Hikaru no Go and I was like, I understand what's happening. - I like, because I also read Hikaru no Go as well. I read all of it. And I remember there was a point where they tried to explain what was going on to the viewer. And I think halfway through the manga, they just stopped. They just stopped showing the matches, right? And they just like,

- I'm not even gonna try and explain it. This guy wins and you see it like it's a manga that just it bases its hype on of people off of like character reactions as opposed to what's going on in the match. - It's not very good, is it? - I think it's because they just assume you're like, you're 15 volumes in, you should know how this works by now. We're not gonna explain it to you.

Like, I still don't think I understand how football works. And I watched all of... What do you mean football? Sorry, American football. Oh, okay. Sorry, football. I don't know how football works. And I watched... I read all of Eyeshield 21. I think I understand how it works. I don't think

I don't think that's like very, you know, like realistic. Like you're not gonna be like, you're not gonna be watching the Super Bowl and be like, "Well, he could have done a devil bat ghost there. Why didn't he?" - But you know when you're like watching something and you're like, "I feel like I should understand how this base game works." Yeah, I don't. Baseball is another one that I've watched stuff about and I'm like, "I think I understand the baseball, but I'm not so sure." - Really? Baseball's fairly easy to figure out.

I don't understand when they swap that much. But then again, I've never watched the game. Three strikes, right? And they swap teams? Yeah. So you get three goes and then everyone... No, because then everyone on the field swaps? Yeah. Yeah. Oh. You've got to strike out. So that's three outs.

- Yeah, so it's not three like throws, right? - No, it's three strikes. - So when you throw in baseball, it can either be a strike or a ball. And you have a strike zone that pitchers have to throw into. - Yeah, I know that. - So when it's three strikes,

and then they're out. And when it's three outs, they switch. - Right, right. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And there are usually nine innings. - I don't know, it's just like, even when I read stuff about it, my baseball just doesn't look fun. Am I bad? Am I wrong? - Baseball's hella fun, dude. - Really? - Yeah, I love watching baseball. - I mean, there's a lot of sports that are fun to play, but not fun to watch. - I feel like it would be fun to play, but not fun to watch. - To me, that's baseball, that's golf.

That's cricket. Sorry, Indians. Um, I'm offended. Like I have, I have fun playing them, but watching them, I kind of fall asleep. I mean, I think kind of same with American football as well. Cause, uh, I think my problem with a lot of American sports growing up with, you know, somebody who watched, you know, uh, you know, real football, um,

and a lot of Europeans. Yes, I fucking said it. Yes, I fucking said it. It's the amount of starting and stopping and the advertisements that go in between. - Yeah, that's what I don't really like about the NFL or the American football is like, yeah, it's just way too many starts and stops. And I'm just like, right as like when a play is happening and you're like, oh shit, here we go. Oh, they stopped. - I don't understand.

This is again from someone who's, again, I think I understand how American football works. I don't, I'm not sure entirely. You think you understand how it works? I think I understand the rules, right? Okay. But even when I'm watching it, my older brother really likes American football, but I'm just thinking like, why would I ever want to watch this over rugby? Yeah, I'd much rather watch the rugby. There's no point where I've ever watched an American football game and thought, fuck, I wish this was rugby.

Sorry, there's no point that I haven't thought that. Every single time I watch American football, I'm like, I just wish this was rugby. - I think just because, I'm gonna be the American here. I'm gonna be the American sticking up for American football. Because I think, even though I just complained about the stop-start, I think,

the beauty of American football is that it comes in bursts, right? And when that burst happens, I don't think there's another sport that could really compete with American football with just the amount of small things happening in such a short period of time. Because there are so many things going on

when it's in play. - Australian football would like to have a word with you. - Okay, I haven't watched Australian football, Joey. - That's our footy. - Okay, Joey. But to me that is the real strength of American football. - It's super intricate, especially when you know, when you have an idea of like, oh, that's this play and they're doing all these different things. That's fun to watch, but it's like,

It happens so quickly. It happens so quickly. And then by the time you're like, oh, that was kind of cool. Then they're stopped. - Yeah. - Plus that's why I love basketball. Basketball is so fun to watch. - Basketball is really fun. - Basketball is hella fun. - Yeah, it's sports that, you know, have a constant movement going on. That's why rugby is so fun because it's like, except if it's like a penalty or whatever, it's just like constantly moving. - Yeah, like to me, like this is a preference. Like I, as a spectator sport, I do like when the,

when the rules are, how can I, how can I, how can I word this like fluid? You know, that's like the offense and defense can change at any time. If, if there's, if there's a sport where, you know, you have an offensive team and a defensive team, and then they swap at certain intervals, like American football, like,

baseball, cricket or whatever, then that's like, I like it when anything can happen, when there's more randomness of like, you know, someone. You want Mario Party? Yeah, basically. What are the items? Banana, put some banana peels on the baseball field and then I'll watch.

- Yeah, I mean like every sport has- - You should play the Mario baseball game. You'd love that game. - They'd bring out a new Mario soccer. - Yeah, they are. - Is there a Mario baseball game? - Yeah, on GameCube. - Super Mario Strikers. - No, Strikers is the soccer. - That's the football game. - Yeah, Sluggers is the baseball game. - Oh, Sluggers. - Oh my God, dude, that's a blast in the past, bro. I tried to get that game for Christmas for so goddamn long. My parents had to like buy it off some shady Chinese website and it turned up and my parents and I also was too young. I didn't know about region lock. - Yeah.

And my mom, bless her, she tried so goddamn hard to get a copy of this game, but they just never sold it in Europe. - I found Sluggers the other day actually in Akihabara and I bought it and I played it for the first time since I was like 12. And I was like, this game's godlike, easily the best Mario sports game. - No, Strikers was really good. - Strikers is good, but I'm more of a fan of baseball than soccer.

- No, no, football, you're right. You were right the first time, Joey. - No, it's soccer. - You were right the first time. - It's soccer. - You were right the first time, Joey. - It's soccer. I refuse to call soccer football. - Oh my God. - But anyway, that's been this episode of Trash Taste. We did talk about a wide bunch of things today. - A random episode. - Yeah, very random episode from wildlife to sad boys to back to video games, right?

- God, I wanna eat a fucking tortoise so bad. God, I wish I could have tried that tortoise, man. I bet it's so good. - What is it with you and extinct food? Like first it's the extinct banana. - If I was born in like the British empire, I would have been the one guy they were like, "Fuck, don't let him on the fucking boat, dude. He's just gonna stop bringing on weird fucking animals

- The reason why it hasn't had a genome name is because of Connor Cahoon. - Dude, I would have been like, sorry, scientists, man. You gotta try it. Oh wait, you can't, I ate it all. - Okay, here's the thing.

- Since we're past the era of discovery where, you know- - Are you adding in another topic before we end this? - I guess so. - Yeah, go on then. - Since we're past the era of discovery, I'm jealous of not the people who were the first to like discover this new land, but imagine like discovering a new animal and being the first person to ever taste it.

- The people who taste it of your type of people. - What do you mean? - Well, if you're like, you know, in Australia, I'm sure like Aborigine people had eaten a bunch of the stuff that was there. - Yeah, of course. - Sure, sure, sure. - But yeah, I guess you could, you would be the first foreigner to try it. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And document it. - I guess. I think to me, that's way more exciting than discovering you've had mass. - Think about all the foods that might've tasted good, but the first guy who had it thought it tasted bad. So he never, he never tasted it. - Yeah, but it's also like, there's like a terrifying element to it, right? Because you don't know, like, could you imagine the first person who drank like cow's milk?

Like that would have been fucking terrifying. - It would have been terrifying, which is really weird. - Yeah, it's like, oh, this weird white shit just came out from the tit of a cow. I'm gonna drink it. - I respect it, I respect it. - Big balls, big balls. - You'd be pretty sure the little cow drinking it, you thought, oh, yeah. - Yeah.

- Anyway, that's been trash taste. - You know who else likes milk? Our patrons. - They love milk and probably giant tortoises too. - I was thinking how the fuck am I gonna segue into the patrons? Milk. - This guy loves giant tortoise right here. - I thought you said something completely different. - Wait, what? - I thought you said, "You know who we love to milk?" Our patrons. - Oh, God.

- Hope you enjoyed this episode of Trash Taste. See you guys. - Hey, if you wanna be milked, then make sure to go to our page on patreon.com/trashtaste. Also follow us on Twitter, send us a message on the subreddit, and if you hate our face, listen to us on Spotify. But yeah. - Anyway, that's been Trash Taste. We'll see you guys next week. Bye!