Wingo Bingo (Nick Kroll, Owen Burke, Hannah Pilkes)
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Toast may be quicker, but oatmeal is thicker. Either way, why are you eating breakfast when there are so many zombies out in the yard? Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang. That was a catchphrase submission from Wool the Clown. Thank you to Wool the Clown for that catchphrase submission. I don't know. I don't like it. It was too hard to say. Now, the hunt continues. The hunt continues. But...

And this show will also continue. And I'm so happy you're listening to it. My name is Scott Aukervit. I'm the host of Comedy Bang Bang. We have an exceptional show a little bit later. We have a grief counselor and we also have an animal.

I wonder if it's animal from the Muppet Show. I love animal. Yeah. You have an animal energy about you. Thank you. Oh, no. I meant Dr. Manzoukas. I meant Gonzo. No, Manzoukas has a Gonzo energy. Yeah. Maybe because of the hair. Sure. There's a lot of hair there. Yeah. But I have a different animal. No, you have an animal energy about you. Do I have a Dr. Teeth energy about me? Yeah.

I'm just cool. Yeah. Honestly, that's a fair... I think that's a good comp for you. People say I'm Kermit, but I take offense because he's such an uptight little... You're Kermit presenting, but in reality, you're Dr. Tooth. I'm Dr. Teeth? Yeah. I know. You're Dr. Tooth. Oh, just one tooth? Just one tooth. Okay. Well... So... Hmm. All right. Have you watched the Muppets movie? Have you showed... Have I watched the Muppets movie? Yeah. Yeah.

Have you ever seen it? I got to see it. This is another conversation. We don't have time to do a Nick Hasn't Seen episode here. Let's do that. Yeah. But let me welcome our guest of honor. Eight years ago, a show...

burst onto the scene on a little platform called Netflix that up till then had just been sending DVDs in the mail to people. Yeah, and then? And then this show burst onto the scene and has completed eight incredible seasons. It is concluding its run. And what better way to celebrate it than coming on this show?

with a guy who's never seen it hosting it and none of the writers nor cast would show up to celebrate. I burned so many creative bridges in the process of making this show and to be here with you, someone who's never seen the show. Someone who was drawn on the show. Someone who believes that he was drawn on the show won't accept that, of course. Paula Tompkins and I were drawn on the show and we're not allowed to voice the characters, apparently. And specifically not allowed to, not even not cast, but not allowed to. That was the one stipulation. Yeah.

But still. Someone who looks a lot like David Caruso while Paul F. looks like Dennis Farina. These are not compliments. Dennis Farina. Worse.

In any case, Big Mouth is wrapping up its run here on Netflix. He is here to celebrate it. He is making his 48th appearance on Comedy Bang Bang. Is that for real? That is for real. Holy shit. That is an average of three a year. That's fucking, that's what I'm talking about. Yes. Keep it the original 48. Who needs? Who needs the, what do you call it? Who needs Hawaii and fucking Canada, you know? You think Canada's the 50th state? Right?

I got it right. But Big Mouth season eight is out now. His show that he's producing, Adults, is out this week, I believe. And then his film, I Don't Understand You, comes out June 6th. Please welcome back

for his 48th appearance, Nick Kroll. Thank you so much for having me. Thanks, guys. Thank you guys so much. Thanks for having me. 48th appearance. That's crazy. Isn't it amazing? And, you know, they must have been in the early years because you... It's been a little less frequent. A little sparse. I go, hey, I'd love to come in and do a deep dive on Big Mouth. And then Scott's like, yeah, you know, we've been so busy at the show. Well, I mean, to be fair,

This was rescheduled three times, and some of the guests that I originally had could no longer make it. No, of course. No, I feel like right now, you've mentioned those three things. I'm very incredibly blessed to have all of them coming at once, and I made you reschedule me, and I am so grateful. But you're here now. But I'm here now. You're in the hot seat. I'm in the late... It's the late afternoon versus the morning after the premiere, and...

And I'm in that. The premiere of Adults, we should mention, which comes out this week. Yes, which I'm very excited about. And would it surprise you to learn that I've seen two episodes? There you go. Mm-hmm. I do my research on this show other than watching Big Bounce. At this point, it's like, though, let's go through the stats because these were sent to me by Netflix. Mm-hmm.

What do we have? We have 81 episodes. Of Big Mouth. Of Big Mouth. 20 episodes of Human Resources, which, of course, as you know intimately, the spinoff you were a major HR head. All those characters from Big Mouth, they're all over on Human Resources. You get it. The cops that are based on you and Paula have a 12 episode there. Only series regulars on the show. So.

Seasons one through seven have included 71 episodes and nearly 2,000 minutes of awkwardness. Okay. That resulted in over 50 Emmy nominations. This show's been nominated for Emmys. And you know what the great part is? I personally have never had to deal with that. In what...

In what way? I've never been nominated. Oh, you've never been nominated. I've never been nominated. So these are all Emmys that are not for the show, like, because as a producer, or not for you personally as a performer. No, it's for the show itself. I guess I was nominated as a creator of the show. Didn't it win one for a show? It's won a couple. It won Outstanding Animated Program, according to this email I received. Well, there you go.

I don't know if that's true. I don't think that's true. Sorry. The series brought home Netflix's first Emmy nomination for Outstanding Animated Program. There you go. That's what they're looking for. To just bring the taste of it that close to an early Netflix. It was a DVD business, and then people saw Archer. And then Lily Hammer. Yeah.

And of course it was, it was us and Lily hammer. It was an animation. It was a, it was all DVD. And then they saw, uh, all the children masturbating and they, they realized they couldn't send it over state lines. Exactly. And so it had that's, and that's how streaming started. So people could watch your show and masturbate at home. Uh, Maya Rudolph, who I'm reading is on this show. One, one,

Four Emmys for this. Yes. She's won four Emmys. This has been a real... A real boondoggle for her. Yeah, it really is.

Can you imagine how many Emmys I would have won if I had voiced this policeman character? Oh my god. I mean, I don't know how you... I guess they would give you and Paul the Emmys for like the first duo. Co-Emmys! Best duo. Best duo. The artist who drew you guys has won multiple Emmys for his adaptation. I would expect nothing less. David Caruso himself has now won several Emmys for it. Across its eight seasons, 200

122 guest stars lent their voices. Wow. They could have made that 224. Nick Kroll has voiced 81 characters, and that's as many episodes as exist. We have one voice, one line per episode. Hi. Hi. Does anyone need penis enlargement surgery?

Okay. Sorry, but you've booked it, Scott. I think the show's over. The show also featured 74 original songs. Mark Rivers. You know Mark Rivers. Yeah. Mark worked with many times on Mr. Show. The rest. Mark Rivers has written almost every single one of the songs on the show. Who wrote the other ones? Lin-Manuel Miranda. I don't know if you've heard of him. Hack. Uh-huh. Unsuccess. I would call him a proven unsuccess. Uh,

He's no Mark Rivers. I mean, I love Linton. He's no Mark Rivers. That's what I say when I'm talking to either of them. And then a couple songs in the international episode. And then let's see. Yeah. Indian writer, performer wrote a song. And then I guess Mark wrote Megan Thee Stallion. We had Megan Thee Stallion do the show. And she did a song that Mark wrote for her. Wow. Incredible. Yeah. I always thought Mark would write a Megan Thee Stallion song. When he was a young man living in.

Seasons one through seven each generated over 156 million social impressions. That's a lot of social impressions. The thing I'm most proud of about the show is the social impressions. I don't do like rich little impressions, but I do social impressions. So just impressions of your friends. Yeah, and that I've created a bot farm that allows the Netflix to believe that there's been social impressions. Oh, good. Yeah, that's your real business. You're making all the money. The bot farm. Yeah.

You were very instrumental in the election this year. Yes. Both of them. Yeah. Fantastic. Both of them. Very happy with the outcome. And from what I'm reading, the season eight premiere campaign has already racked up 24 million plus global impressions fueled by trailers, viral clips, original songs, and fan first activations. Where, you know, the thing beyond the social impressions is the fan first activations that I...

But we did actually send a van around the country with Maury and Connie, who are the hormone monsters. I could explain what the hormone monsters are to you. It might be helpful. Just keep going. I can't believe someone listening to episode 15,000 of Comedy Bang Bang would be like, I've never heard about this show, Big Mouth. This has been so informative. No, it's important you're here because people can get really into the first couple of seasons of a show and then just...

kind of forget it's on and go like, oh, is that, you know, but it's important. You've come back to your credit. You have come back, I believe every year to promote this show. I, and I thank you very much. Well, I love, I genuinely love the show and I love big mouth. I'm always happy to talk about it. I wish you like better this show or big mouth. As far as the money that's been made for me personally, comedy, bang, bang, comedy, bang, bang.

I mean, you got sad scale for being on the TV show. By the way, you're looking at IFC residuals from the show? Oh, they stopped paying residuals, I think, because it's all on the AMC Plus platform. Which I love. Yeah, no longer airing on IFC, apparently, because I haven't seen a residual in many a year. Well, but the streaming residuals are killer these days. Killing, that's what we struck for. That's what we...

So, no, I love talking about the show. And I do think, I really, I do believe we have ended the show. Like, I firmly believe, like, we did a good job of landing the plane successfully for what the show was and where it ends up. Like, I think it will be a gratifying...

I've read a little bit about the final episode, and I think that the premise of it is indeed something that I think would satisfy fans of the show. Right. For those who... You've read ahead, but like...

but for all I can explain, it's like the guy, all the kids go on trial and they're in court and everybody for the show, you know, the guest stars all come in and. Yeah, exactly. And they all come in, all the previous guest stars from all the, all 222 guest stars and all 81 of your characters come in and testify. Yeah. It's about a 15 hour episode. It's,

And it's just a flashback episode. It was harder. All the kids end up in jail at the end. Yeah. It's just harder to animate, but ultimately gratifying. Very worthwhile. All the kids ended up in jail. Yeah. And you've been animating by hand for the entire... I've been self-drawing. Yeah. I do it all by hand. It's all on a legal pad. I do all the animation on a legal pad. And how do they erase the lines on the legal pad? Because I've always had these...

these questions. I don't know. I'm not the techie guy. I just do my thing. I studied it. I studied Underwalt. How many drawings would you... How

How many drawings would you say you have drawn across all eight seasons? Oh, how many drawings have I drawn? Let's see. Each show is at least 12 frames. So, you know who has drawn a lot of drawings while we are in the room is Gil Ozeri. Gil Ozeri, I've never met. You've never met him. But interesting guy from what I understand. Yeah. You know, he's friends with this guy who's the busiest man in the world. Ned Bellinella. Yeah.

And probably 800 other. I didn't know that they knew each other. Yes, they know each other. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. Ed can never get back to Gil because he's got too much going on. Right, of course. But Gil,

Gil Ozeri, one of our writers for all eight seasons and does voice on the show, drew some of the most disturbing images in the writer's room throughout that process. And it was a really fun. It was a fun time. That's a glimpse behind the scenes. This is the kind of tidbits that the fans want. You allow your writers to draw and fuck around? It's a sandbox. Wow. What a dream job. It's a kitty litter.

Yeah, I would love to, like, you know, if I had a regular job, like as a plumber or whatever, and I'm just sitting around in someone's bathroom drawing. Just drawing. What the fuck are you doing? Using your own feces to draw the walls. Your own feces? Yeah, your own. Why not this guy's? Patty Harrison also drew some

real special images throughout the run of the show. Did you keep these or did they keep these? They're going to be auctioned off here on the Comedy Bang Bang website. It's a silent auction. How do we do a silent auction? You go to my Venmo. Whatever you send to you, that's what... Check out at hotdoggin'.

And why did you reserve that so long ago? Because I remember when I first met you back in like 2006. When did you move to LA? I moved in 2007, but I came probably to do like Death Ray and Bang Bang early, probably like 2005, 2006. But you were always like, hey, if I ever get a Venmo account, I'm going to be hot dogging. I was not on the PayPal mafia, but I was adjacent. So that when Venmo popped, I hit yes.

I was adjacent to Manzoukas. That's a previous guest on the show, by the way. No, he's a chef who lives next door. Sure. Originally portrayed by Jeffrey Caracterini. Yes, of course. So this was the PayPal mafia. At this point, just a PayPal mob. Not a full mafia. Not a full mafia, yeah. They were immigrants. Yes, and I had been a fan. Me and Elon had been huge fans of the movie Hot Dog. Mmm.

Hot Talk the Movie. Yeah, Hot Talk the Movie. Because Elon sort of sees the world as like a ski... A resort. Yeah, a ski resort, like a hot 80s sex comedy ski resort. Yeah, like a Black Diamond thing that someone's going to go down in the last act. Black Diamond, tits in the hot tub kind of vibe. Sort of an out cold kind of... Yeah, ski school.

Remember with the guys from that? Ski School 2 with Bill Dwyer. Of course, who could forget? Bill Dwyer's star turn in Ski School 2. Never lets you forget it. Yeah, one of the Carradine brothers. Keith, David. David, but I might be confusing this, and I am, with Revenge of the Nerds. Yes. Right? Well, he definitely is in Revenge of the Nerds. Yes, he's not in this other one. It's these other guys that are like those guys, but they're not. Got it.

Anyway, that's how I got at Hot Doggin' on Venmo. Check me out. Hit me up. Send me cash. So now you and I have known each other for a good two decades. Wow. And you were on the Comedy Bang Bang television show many times, at least once a year. Yes. And yet I'm not on this Big Bell show. No.

No. You know what? It was here, and I'll give you the honest reason why. I don't, and I think the fans can attest, there's something about the quality of your voice. I used to hear that when I was working at DreamWorks. Certain people in charge over there used to talk about various stars and go, they don't have a good voice. Really? Yeah. Come on, name names. No, I don't want to do that. I'll tell you during the break. Jack Black.

No. Say his name, Jack Black. He's in all the Kung Fu Pandas. He loves it. He wanted to do the television show, and they never asked him. Oh, he's got the... Really? Yeah, he said that on the TV show, so I'm not telling tales out of school. He would have done it, and they never asked him to do it. What an idiot. Who? Him. Him?

He should have just shown up. He should have shown up and taken it. It's his. He should have Kung Fu Panda'd those people. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. He's playing Kung Fu Panda. Why can't he beat Kung Fu Panda? Exactly. So now, Big Mouth is, of course, ending, and we're giving it a fond farewell here on the show. But Nick is not resting on his laurels. He...

has the television show Adults, which is coming out on the FX channel this week. That is the way you pronounce it. FX. FX channel. And I've seen two episodes of this, but I want you to describe to our listeners who are not awarded screeners as I have, not to brag.

to break. Not a big deal. Still hard copy screeners. Netflix sent them, which I thought was very strange. Yeah, it's weird. Another network. But tell our listeners exactly what this show is about. How did you get involved and what is it about? I felt myself getting older. And so I tried to, like, as much as I could be a creative vampire, I

On younger people. Like a Drake, but for comedy. Yeah. A culture vulture. Absolutely. A culture vulture. Yeah. That's hard to say. But you know what's not hard to say is vulture. And if you guys are looking for great pop culture news, go to vulture. Do they do the listicles or is that another place? They do. That's BuzzFeed. BuzzFeed. Oh, yeah. From our friend's brother. Yes. Yes. Originally from our friend's brother.

Dave Musk. Does he have a brother, Elon? He has like 10 brothers. He probably does. And he's making so many kids. Oh, it's so awesome. Be fruitful and multiply, Elon. Way to go, man. So...

adults as a show uh ben chronigold and rebecca shaw created it were at the we started this process like five years ago and they were like 24 they're writers for fallon really funny and they came to me this idea for a show that was sort of like we want to make a live action big mouth for your 20s like about what the awkwardness and horniness and all the stuff of of that era and

uh, being your early twenties, what it felt like when, and I, and I had very, and it was like, and you were like, great, let's turn into a cartoon today. Yeah. Let's do it. Let's do it as a cartoon. We'll do, I've got the deal. Yeah. We'll put it there. I have, I get all the points and it'll be great. We'll do it. I'll do 81 voices. I'll do 81 voices. There'll be the same voices. You've already heard 222 guest stars. We'll make sure that Aukerman is not allowed to be on it. And that's when they were like, let's do it. When they got that confirmation, uh,

And no, but it was it really made sense. And they and they were kind of like in the great vein of like the friends, girls, those kinds of shows of like, what is it like to be in your early 20s? And it's set like if the kids if the girls and girls were living in like Brooklyn and Broad City were there in Brooklyn. Now those kids who are like figuring everything out are have to live in like deep Queens.

I like someone's house and like... So it's the same show, but they're just living in a different part of the city? Yeah, it's a different part of the city. Sounds cool. Adults out this week. Yeah. Don't worry. It's a different part of the city.

But it's sort of the idea is that thing of like you have this idea of what your 20s are going to be. You're going to move to New York. And then like the reality is you're like living in some one of your friend's parents house in Deep Queens. And the city, everything feels so far away. And it's five people who live together, I believe. Five codependent roommates. Yeah. But it's five friends who live together. And yeah.

And it really was like, it's got hopefully the vibe of what a friend feels like, but it's, you know, it's a fact. But it's also filthy. It's filthy, you know? It's disgusting. Thank you. From the demented mind of...

Danny DeVito. No, but these characters, they have mouths that are almost potties. Yes, thank you. I do. They don't mind that bathroom type of humor comes out of their mouths. Absolutely. And they, in fact, it wouldn't surprise me if bathroom materials- Passed in and out. Yeah, just in and out. Yeah. These characters are gross. They're gross, they're demented, and they're having the time.

the time of their life. Time of their lives. But it is... No, it's the cast is incredibly... We found like five young actors. A couple of them had done a couple things, but it's really most of their first things, they're all individually, I think, really funny. But collectively, it's like a Voltron of... And they're also...

Put them together. They're over 100 years old. Yes. If you combine that. And that was the thing. The choice is you could either hire Scott Ackerman to play all five characters. One 100-year-old or five 20-year-olds. You chose the five 20-year-olds. We chose the five 20-year-olds.

All right. But they're all, yeah, collectively funny. And then they're really funny. I think they have good chemistry together. It's pretty, it gets, the show gets, I'm really, I'm excited for people to see it. Yeah, coming out this week, a little later in the week. And that's very exciting. It comes out on FX and then the next day drops, the next morning drops on Hulu. On Hulu. FX for Hulu. We know the pipeline of however this works. This is a savvy audience. They're native to the digital landscape and we meet them where they are. Mm-hmm.

But now you're working for Netflix on one project, and of course we have the other one, the spinoff that I can't remember what it was called. And then you're suddenly working for Disney over here at the FX channel. What is that like to straddle both worlds? Well, what I'm trying to get is sort of a threesome, a thruple, where I am bringing Netflix. Obviously, I go back with Netflix. They're my primary. Yeah. But then I invite FX in, and then we can have...

a relationship where we all have an open understanding of the deal. Does Netflix ever get to leave the room and you still continue with Disney? You know what I mean? Or does Netflix always have to be watching? Like, this is what we talk about when we're in throuples therapy with FX and Netflix. Disney, it's because it's, they want to be. By the way, this is a good adults plot line. You gotta write this down. Oh, trust me. Throuples therapy is. Throuples therapy? Are you kidding me?

It writes itself. We did it on AI. Good. Yeah. Oh, by the way, we should mention all of your projects are totally AI now. 100% AI. We're using Microsoft's, it's Bing's AI. Oh, good. Oh, yeah. It has a little MS Paint in there as well.

You would not believe what Clippy has been pitching. Clippy, I love him. Well, it's a great show. It's out this week. I also want to talk about the film, and it is a film, not a movie. Thank you. I Don't Understand You is the title of it.

It is top-lined by a little man named you and a little man named Andrew Rannells. Thank you. Who I believe I've seen at two parties recently. Yes. He's great at a party. He's great on camera. He's great on Big Mouth. May have sat at my table at a wedding I was at. Oh,

How was he at the wedding? He was great. Yeah. Yeah. Got to meet him, his husband. Yeah. And he was on the Comedy Bang Bang TV show a while ago, and I think didn't remember it. But he was very funny on it. Who could forget a weird studio in Glendale? Hey, don't give away our assassination coordinates. Okay, right. Sorry. Of course. What if I still hang out there in the halls?

Oh, my God. Remember this? So the guy, I just read this article that the guy who was like, as it said in Deadline article, the architect of the Voight-

hollywood thing like the john voight hollywood thing has just invested in hollywood studios and i was like what studio and then i read the articles avenue six and van nuys which is like a has like a half a block fake the worst new york street i've ever seen right yeah we shot a bunch of like very like low end crawl show sketches in this place and i was like oh i know this place

this place is a fucking joke of a studio but hey they're there now and that's where we're gonna be filming everything that i'm so excited and so i just want to say we're thrilled to be coming in and john part of the void empire and i and when it comes down to angelina jolie or void i'm team void all the way definitely yeah yeah and um and just i'm proud of sly i'm proud of the all the ambassadors hey sly hey

Hey, knock, knock. Who's there, Sly? Who? I don't remember now. Hey. Oh, wait. It's my brother, Frank. Hey. But is that all we want to say about the film? No. I want to say that the film is a film and not a movie. Thank you. Good. The film is me and Andrew Rannells. We are a married couple going on vacation to Italy. We've been trying to adopt a baby together.

And we're kind of having it. We're at a crossroads with a lot of our marriage. And then... Not like the crossroads where you play the blues against the devil. Where Robert Johnson... No, no, no, no. Different crossroads. Okay, good, good. No, no, no, no. It's two white gay men in Rome and not an old black man deciding whether he's going to follow the devil or... But you do play the guitar in the film. I play the guitar and I made sure to have a double. Mm-hmm.

I practiced really hard to make sure that I had a double that they would never be able to pan because they always want to pan up. They want to do the pan up. They want to do the pan like, oh, look at that finger work, and then they pan up, and it's not me. Laughter

I wanted to make sure we had that. So that got done. No, but the film is... It was interesting. I just talked to Mark Maron. I don't know if you know Mark. Wow. Of the WTF podcast, I believe. Yes, WTF. Did you reschedule that one three times or was that locked in the schedule? That one was planned purposefully. Purposefully. Purposefully to move you around. He watched the movie and had...

the longest uh um um not super positive review of it so sounds like the wtf experience it was i had a blast but it was very funny because but what was interesting about it was that i think people you go and you think you're watching this one movie you're watching like kind of a like a fun rom-com uh uh with me and andrew and then a turn happens and it

It really, it takes a hard turn. Right. And it becomes sort of like a different genre. I mean, it's, it continues to be funny, but it takes like a dark turn. That's more of like a farce, like a murdery farce. Did you say farts or farce? It's a murdery farts is what I call my farts.

Okay, good to know. And this is directed by a couple of gentlemen named David Craig and Brian Crano. And very funny. It's sort of loosely based on their life trying to adopt a kid. Did they go to Italy too? And they went to Italy and had a nightmare vacation in Italy and they sort of combined those experiences. And yeah, it's... I mean, Randall's is the fucking best. We had a lot of fun together. I think the movie's really funny and...

but it is like, it's interesting trying to understand what an audience will expect. And you know, this digital streaming. Oh yeah. That you pioneered. And I pioneered by sending child pornography growth. Yeah.

Well, that's exciting. That comes out on June 6th, which is about 10 days away or so, 12 days, 13 days away. The day after my birthday? The day after your birthday. Happy birthday. How old of a gentleman will you be? 31 years old. 31. Wow. I was born in 1996. Yeah? Yeah. Oh, wow. So you were five at 9-11? Yeah. Yeah.

Wow. It was great. I didn't know what was happening. No, but you knew something was happening. But I knew I loved the tall buildings. Yeah. I didn't want to see them go down. I know. You looked at your mom and dad are crying in the kitchen. Yeah, and I had one single tear roll down my face. Oh, and it ruined your makeup? Yeah.

Wearing so much cover up. I Don't Understand You is out June 6th. Adults is out this Thursday on FX. FX and Hulu. Friday on Hulu. Everybody knows the delivery mechanism. And Big Mouth is out right now, season eight. We're all celebrating it, and it's eight wonderful years that I want to thank you personally for. Oh, man. To not have you on the show once has been the experience of a lifetime. The dream, what?

All right, we need to take a break, but we're deep in Nick's 48th appearance here on Comedy Bang Bang. This is exciting. When we come back, we have a grief counselor. That's exciting. Nick, you ever spoken to a grief counselor? I need to. Okay, yeah, I think I should too. Big mouth is ending. We also have an animal coming up on the show. This is a big show. None of the cast, Maya didn't show up. She won four Emmys.

She don't need to do this. Exactly. She'll still win the Emmy this year without being on this show. Honey, I'm just trying to get a webby nom. But this is an exciting show. We're going to come right back with more Nick Kroll, more Comedy Bang Bang. We'll be right back after this. Yeah.

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Hey, everyone, this is Scott Aukerman, host of Comedy Bang Bang, and I wanted to tell you about The Debaters. Now, what is The Debaters? It's a CBC podcast where comedians face off on the most debatable topics, topics like sandwiches versus wraps. Oh, I definitely have an opinion there.

And the Earl of Sandwich would perhaps agree with me on that. Belts versus suspenders, or even whether it's okay to have a favorite child. Host Steve Patterson keeps things rolling in front of a live audience across Canada who vote for their favorites by applause. And yes, favorites is spelled with an O-U. Check out new episodes of The Debaters every Thursday wherever you listen to podcasts. I'm

Comedy Bang Bang, we are back. Nick Kroll is here, 48. Mr. 48, we're going to tall him. Thank you. We're going to tall you. You tall me 48. I'm 48 inches tall. My 48th time on the show. You might be our 48th president as well. That's the hope. Yeah. That would be great. I would love that. I just got to fucking fill out that form. Yeah.

Well, you still have three years. No, I fucking lost it. I put it in the backpack, and it's the one that we ended up donating. Were you born here in the United States? Because you have to be... I was born in the first 48, I'll tell you that much. And are you 35 years old? I'm 31. Fuck.

This is where lying about your age comes back to bite you in the ass. You can't be president. That's the only problem. But Big Mouth Season 8 out now. Adults out this week. I don't understand you out the week after that. And then are you taking a little break? A little nappy nap? Yeah, I would love to take like a month-long nap and then come up for air. So thirsty. Do you wake up from naps? And I want sugar so much when I wake up. I don't wake up from naps. I'm still in there. That's what I tell my kids every day. I don't know if daddy's going to wake up from this nap.

All right. See you in a bit. This might be the last time we see you. All right, well. Kiss daddy goodnight and goodbye forever. Yeah. Kiss daddy on the lips. Daddy might be gone forever. Give daddy a kiss on the lips. Well, this is wonderful. We have to get to our next guest, though. And he's a grief counselor.

And I've never spoken to a counselor who specializes in grief, so this will be enlightening. For me as well. I think so. Yeah. So let's talk to him. Please welcome to the show for the first time, Bate Turfoyle. Hi! Hi.

Oh, hi. How are you? So good. Thanks for having me. It's great to see you. Hi. Bait. Bait Turf Oil. Bait Turf Oil. Yeah. Hi. So nice to meet you. This is Nick Kroll. Hi, Nick. Hi, Bait. How are you? I'm so great. So good to see you. Good to see you, too. It's great to meet you. I thank you so much for coming on the show. Oh, thanks. It's so awesome to be here. Yeah, I'd love to hear about...

Everything about your, I mean, you as a person, certainly, but your job mainly. Because, I mean, as people, we're all basically the same. I've always said that. Oh, you say it constantly. But only our jobs are different. Yes. You know what I mean? Yes, I do. You're a comedian. I'm a comedian. But Bate is a totally different type of person than us. So I'd love to talk to you about that.

Yeah, I'm not a comedian, but I deal with comedians a lot because a lot of comedians live with grief. And that's where a lot of their comedy comes from. You know, this reminded me of when I went to the doctor the other day. Yeah. And I talked to the doctor and I was like, oh, I'm so sad. I'm so depressed. I can't get over it. And he said, oh, OK, well.

I have a solution for you. I just went to the circus and I saw this clown, Pagliacci. He's so amazing. Let me give you, you know, you got to go see him. And I was like, but doctor, I went to the circus and I saw Pagliacci and he sucked.

And then the doctor was like, oh, well, actually, I am Pagliacci patient. And I was like, oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you, but I just I wasn't really into your act. He's like, well, come back a second time and I'll give you free tickets. Come back a second time. You like maybe I had an off night or something like that. And so then I went back and I was like, and he was still just like hacky and lame. I was just yeah, I didn't like him. Yeah. Yeah.

Wait, was that you doing comedy? No. Oh. I don't think so. I thought this was a joke that was going to end. I have a joke, the first joke I ever told. Do you mind, Bate, if I tell this joke? No, of course. The first joke you ever told? No. How old were you when you told this joke? This was an early street joke. It was a kid goes to the circus with his dad, and his name is Pagliacci. No. And he goes to the circus, and the spotlight goes round and around. The lights go out. It stops on this kid.

And the clown comes up to him and he goes, excuse me, son, are you a horse's head? And the son says, no. And the man says, then you must be a horse's ass. And the whole crowd laughs. The poor kid is humiliated. He spends the next like 30, 40 years just like stuck in this. 30, 40 years. Yeah, 30, 40 years just stuck in this cycle of self-hate and doubt. And he decides finally to go and fix it. He goes to, he studies the roasts. He goes to Bob's College of Knowledge.

He does everything he can to learn how to come back, and then he goes back to the circus. This is now 30, 40 years later.

And he pays off the lighting, the spotlight guy, and this clown is still there. Lights go down. Spotlight goes round and round. Did he make sure the clown was still going to be there before he went back? Yeah, he went back. Before he paid for the ticket? Yeah, yeah, exactly. Because that's a waste of money. You know, he made sure he was on the bill. Okay. So he goes in. Lights go down. Spotlight goes round and stops on the man. And the clown comes up to him. He's a little older, a little slower. And he says... 40 years. 40 years. 34 years. He goes, excuse me, sir, are you a horse's head? And the man says, no. And the clown goes, no.

And the clown says, then you must be a horse's ass. And the crowd laughs. And the man who's been waiting 30, 40 years for this moment to come back, studied at Bob's College of Knowledge, looks at the clown and goes, fuck you, clown. So anyway, that's a joke. Yeah, I've heard that before. Yeah.

And this is the first joke you ever told to... It's the first time I've told a debate. Oh, this is the first time you've told a debate? Well, this is... You have such happy lives, you know, to be able to live in this world of fantasy. Yeah, people are drawing at his work. Yeah, that's pretty amazing. People don't draw where I work. People sort of draw from there.

the well of their pain. Yeah, well, so what do you do? So a lot of times someone will say, like, give me an example of something that's bothering them, like a death in the family. Any deaths recently? Yeah, a bunch. Yeah? Yeah. Well, and then I'll be like, I'll listen, and then I'll be like, oh my gosh.

That's like terrible. And then they'll be like, yeah. And I'm like, ugh. And then they'll be like, yeah. And I'm like, it's not good that this happened. And then we talk about it. And then pretty much, that's pretty much it, you know? Do you have any, are you accredited? Well, you know, I have an office.

that i work out of i mean that sounds yeah good and i went to i went to school oh where'd you go to school i went to school i went hvac uh i went to like an hvac sort of repair yeah like air conditioning and vacuum and all of that yeah but a lot of people were really depressed to work there and i would

I can imagine. God, I'd hate to work there. I would ask that. I would say, what's wrong? And they would be like, oh. Crawling around in the air conditioner all day. Yeah. They'd be like, I'm so dusty or I get cut or my wife left me. And I'd be like, oh, it's terrible. Yeah, it's awful. So you just had a natural predilection for this. I can draw the sorrow out of somebody. And then they don't have it anymore. So all you do is you sort of empathize with that. Well, it's more than that. It sounds like that's all I'm doing.

It kind of does sound like you just go, that? Oh, that happened? That sounds terrible. Well, yeah. I mean, I'll help you right now if you want to. Yeah, what's been going on in your life? Mental exhaustion? Well, okay. I'm a little, I'm mentally exhausted from just trying to make sure I can keep you off of my shows.

It's exhausting. And just a general malaise. Yeah, general. But, well, okay. It's terrible. My grandmother, it's almost my birthday. My grandmother passed away on my birthday five years ago. That's terrible. Ugh. Thank you. Ugh.

Terrible. Yeah. What else happened besides that? When was the last time you went swimming in a pool? Oh, I mean, I went swimming a couple last week. That's fun. Yeah. That's much more fun. But I have sensitive skin, so my skin turned kind of red. Ew. Mm.

Hey, do you like spaghetti? I do. I like spaghetti, but I'm starting to have like a gluten intolerance. There's gluten-free pasta. You can have that. Okay. But then I still feel kind of bloated after I eat pasta. Do you like ice cream?

I do. Okay. But I, yeah, I love ice cream. I love chocolate ice cream. I like to put whipped cream on top of my ice cream. Notice that we're not talking about his grandmother anymore. I totally forgot about the whole grandmother thing. You're just talking, you're prattling on about ice cream and what you like on ice cream and stuff. That grief is gone. I feel much better. That's right. I feel like I can finally let go. Honestly, I would love some ice cream right now. I know.

Do you have ice cream? I don't have any. Oh, no. Don't? I don't have any ice cream. Then we don't talk about ice cream for the rest of... I'm sad because I don't have any ice cream. All right. So what do you have? You have water? Yeah, I have water. I have ice. Just frozen water. Let's have one.

I have boiling water. God, why am I just saying water things? God. Well, that's what you have. You have to do what you have. You work with what you have. Work with what you have and you ignore the rest. Okay, yeah, I have water and I'm made up. My body is made up of water. There you go. 75% of it is made up of water. There you go. You're connecting with yourself this way. This is what it's all about. It's really about saying what is bothering me, what's upsetting me, push it to the side. Yeah, okay. Push it to the side.

and just leave it there. Okay. Leave it there like a Christmas tree on a curb on December 26th. Leave it there! That's too soon. That's too soon to get rid of your Christmas tree. Nick, take a breather on this. I'm talking about Christmas. I...

I have so many thoughts. Well, I want to talk about that. I grew up Jewish and it's been really hard for me not to have Christmas. Yeah. Talk to Nick about this. Well, what did you have? I had Hanukkah. Oh, that's fun. Eight days. Eight days of Hanukkah. Eight days. You had eight days. That's more than Christmas. So you think about that's amazing. Huh. That's really great, right? Thank you. Now, don't ever say the word Christmas again. Don't.

think about Christmas. Scott told me that off mic that I wasn't allowed to say that. Yeah, well, you should listen to him. He's, you know, he's going to take my job. You're gunning for my job. How did you develop these techniques? Because these are revolutionary. Well, I did it a lot by, by, by,

butting into people's business that's where i start i'm like you seem upset or why do you have that cut on your head or whatever and then they'll be like oh i don't want to talk about it and then i'm like well come on let's talk about it or i'm gonna make it up and tell the boss and then they'll like all right i'll tell you and then they tell me and then i'm like forget it just push it out of your brain and then like sometimes would you ever tell the boss some if i didn't like the person i would

Just because, or if I wanted their parking space. I saw, there's a, when we walked into the podcast, I noticed there's an older, older, older man. Yes. Outside in the heat. Uh-huh. Kind of on a leash. Yes. Yeah, what is that about? That man, he's someone who's working through something and I'm helping him work through it. He's a patient or a client. Well, yeah. He is.

is very upset he his family left him his family how his family they collectively left him this is the usually you get kicked out of the house or they all collectively left the house he left they go to an apartment or a different i mean they dear john him his whole family dear john this is a lot of people to move it was like a family of six he had five kids yeah just kick him out of the house and so they all left and he was like so upset about it and i was like know what you gotta do break

Forget it. Forget them. And so like we threw away all the pictures. They made their own custom calendar with like every month is a different theme of whatever. Sounds like a lot of fun. Ripped it up. Oak smart. Replaced it with a what the bleep do we know calendar. Yeah, sure. And I haven't heard a piece of what the bleep do we know calendar. Yeah. Yeah. No, they're great. Yeah.

I've never heard of this, but okay. You don't know the what? What the bleep do we know franchise? What the bleep do we know franchise? Oh, it's huge. Okay. Have you never seen that documentary? I'll look into it. It's huge. It's huge. It's huge. And so then, and then he's like, I'm still thinking of them. I'm still thinking of my kids. I miss my kids. It's my kid's birthday. I'm like, no, who doesn't know about birthdays? Dogs.

Thank you. Dr. Nick. Dr. Scott. So he's now on a leash. Now he thinks like a dog. So I give him like bacon from a butcher. I'll just like throw it. Hey, you're treating your dog. You're treating your dog. They're going to die soon, but you're treating them really well. It's fine. And I walk him. And if he does die, we don't talk about that.

because that would be upsetting sure so he's like oh i went to the doctor and the doctor says i'm eating too much raw bacon i say don't see that doctor anymore yeah smart don't tell anybody that i'm feeding you this and so what we what we do is now he just lives in the moment he's like hungry poop sleep dog hot cold and it's i'll tell you something he

He's thrilled. And you sleep him in a kennel? He likes the cage. He likes the cage. They like it in there. It seems cruel, but they like it. It seems cruel, but you know what? For him, he's fine. And he said something about you sort of controlling his finances now as well. Yeah. Well, power of attorney was a phrase that he said. Dogs don't have

bank accounts and they don't their paws this is true I'm not a veterinarian but you know a little bit about dogs you have an office I have an office but the dogs their paws physically can't work an ATM machine right

They're too big. They don't have the dexterity of an orangutan. And they don't have fingerprints because they don't have fingerprints. They don't have fingerprints. They don't have fingerprints. They don't have... They can't remember their pin. Yeah. So there's a lot of problems for dogs. So I'm like... What's the shortest pin that a dog could remember? Like... A dog... Like maybe like...

Two? The number two? I wouldn't even... If you said to a dog, like, okay, number two is your pin. Number two. Number two. Then a dog went up to an ATM, do you think it would hit number two? I can't speak for all dogs, but this dog cannot. Okay. And I think it's because... And I actually... It's like a badge of honor because he's so broken down as a dog that he can't remember anything. Oh. He knows his name. Right. He knows... What's his name now? His name...

His name now? Yeah. Crunchles. Crunchles. Crunchles. Yeah. Classic dog name. And...

he's crunchles and he knows that he knows he knows his name i don't know if he knows it's his name he just knows it's a word that you're using as a thing as an affection when i grab his ears or like or he's done or he's done something wrong oh crunchles don't you dare get on my bed crunchles and what's going on with crunchles is anal glands because uh well we have to express them every once in a while yeah he you don't let you don't have him rub a

across the floor. Like you have to, sometimes I come home and he's been doing it. Yeah. And then you have to finish it off. Yeah. It looks like, you know what it looks like, you know, in those hospitals where they have lines on the floor that go in different directions to tell you where it's going. That's what it looks like in my house. It's really crazy. Sure. But he, he's really actually well trained. He hates Amazon drivers. Yeah. And,

He sort of barked to me that to him, Amazon drivers are his children. He's also upset about the MGM acquisition, right? The MGM? Oh, well, he's a big Bond fan. He's worried that it's going to water down the franchise. It's going to water down, then they're going to do all these spinoffs, like Q is going to have his own crazy... Do you think Bob Duca would ever come in and say the word Barbara Brock?

over and over? I don't know. We could try it. We could try it. I haven't seen him in a while. Okay. Let's try it. So it's really, you know, so he's happy. He's happy. You're happy. I'm thrilled. Yeah. I have no trauma. That was lucky that I was born. Now, what if he passed? Like, it's hard when you lose a dog, like a pet. How would you deal with that? Oh, yeah.

I would just push it. I wouldn't think about him ever again. Can we try it and try to do the lessons you've taught us? Let's be best duo at the Emmys. Yeah, best duo at the Emmys. We'll be co-grief counselors. Yeah, and Crunchles has died. Crunchles has died? And you're coming in. We have an office, by the way. Oh, you have an office? Yeah. Ooh, what are you paying per square foot?

It's $1,000 per square foot. Jeez, this is a nice office. Yeah, yeah. Wow. Do you have a cold brew machine? No, it's such a small office. We can only afford $2,000, so it's two square feet. Yeah, it's two square feet, so we got to hold. If one of us holds the Nespresso. Well, let's all stand closer together. Okay, here we go. All right, let's get closer. Scrunch in. Scrunch in. All right, here we go. What's your problem, sir? Yeah, what's going on? I don't remember.

Oh, wow. You're already ahead. You've already done. I'm done. You don't need our help at all. Welcome to... Welcome. Hey, another job well done. Welcome to professionalism. We're shaking hands. This is what happens. I've already forgotten about crunching. I wish more patients would do that. Take care of their problem before they come in. I know. That would be a lot easier. Come having had. I tell my patients that all the time. They'll come in like, oh,

my mom just died i'm like i don't want to hear because hey i don't want to get depressed you don't want to get brought down by their bullshit i don't want to get depressed i'm just trying to live my life yeah so if they could just not mention it then i'm like then we go yeah right then you're like cooking with gas then you're just like riffing and we just go we hit the ground running the electricity of just like when two people are just riffing with each other

Yeah, it is. That's what you want in a grief counselor. Health jazz. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So, you know, and for someone like me who has no trauma, nothing. Nothing has ever happened to you? No, I mean. Can I ask about your background a little bit? Sure. Where did you grow up? What was your dad like? Well, I don't know. They abandoned me when I was a baby. They left me in the woods. In the woods. In the woods. That's a bad place to leave.

Yeah, they just left me there. Just to be clear, they left me in the woods at the Woody Harrelson marijuana facility. Zach Woods lives there too, right? Yes. Okay. And Bill Maher's an investor. And they were recently burglared. Sorry, go ahead. They were burglared? Yeah. Oh, they should come see me. They're probably upset about it. So I was left in the woods. And I was found by some poachers.

And they kept me there. And they would use me. That's how I got my name. They used me as bait. As bait for what they were. They were bear poachers. They were bear poachers? So I would just be put out into the dirt. And then bears would come and be like, is that alive or dead? And paw me around. And these are the turf oils? These are the turf oils. They're French Canadian. And they... This is different than turfs. What's that? What?

Do you know what J.K. Rowling is? Have you ever heard of that notorious turf? Oh, Beasts of Grinwald? Yeah, the Griswolds or whatever it is. The Beast of the Griswolds? I'm thinking of the Vacation franchise. Oh, I love that. I love Chevy Chase. What if J.K. Rowling had written Vacation? Wouldn't the world be better off?

- I don't know. - I don't know. We'll never know. - We'll never know and I've already forgotten the question. So I was used as bait. It's weird, I haven't thought about this in a long time. - Gee, I wonder why. - Yeah, and so-- - Your face is, by the way, is turning red. - Yeah. - You're breathing heavy and you, like, I think you've just tamped all of this down, all of these emotions.

Which is not a healthy way... They love me. They love me. And the fact that I... The bears or the... Yeah, the bears. The poachers? The poachers. I provided them with something. Uh-huh. And they love me in return. Like a worm on a hook. Yeah. Like... Like chum in the sea. And then they love me in return. And...

Did they raise you, the poachers? Well, they raised me in the fact that if I would survive the day being bait, then they would then let me sleep that night. In the bear carcass? Yeah, they would fold me into the intestines or something so I'd stay warm. And then next morning, I would eat a little, whatever was left over from what they had. A little bear. And then they would throw me out there and...

So they're catching one bear a day? Oh, they were great. That's too many bears. They caught like one bear. No, they had like six, seven bears a day. Like six a day? Oh, man. The reason why there's like a black bear endangered species is mostly because of my dad.

Right. Because of the turf oils. And they were a couple. They were not a couple. But in my mind, they were a couple. And they resented that I kept putting them together because they were very heteronormative. Yeah, of course. And they were like, we're not a couple. They're a different generation. And I'm like, dad, dad, we're not your dads. Your dad left you in the woods. We're business partners. That's right. We work at Turf Oils Bear Emporium.

So, anyway. This is a story as old as time. This is what, you know what, you use what you were sort of brought into. And then I take whatever, lemons, and I turn it into lemonade. Can I ask you a question? Did you ever develop a relationship with any of the bears that you...

Well, in a way that they would claw at me and bat me around to see if I was alive or not. Oh, you were playing dead. That was your technique? Well, it was that or be destroyed. So I would just take it. And sometimes there was some internal bruising and stuff. I never saw a doctor...

You've never seen a doctor? Well, the turf oils told me not to see a doctor. Were they Christian scientists? What's going on? No, they didn't want to be like, wait, what are all the bruises on this kid? Oh, yeah. And I understood. I was like, who wants to fill out all that paperwork? You don't want protective services coming down and taking you away from the turf oils. Yeah, I feel like if you don't use that, that would be a great line for you to use in your grief counseling. Who wants to fill out all that paperwork? Yeah, who wants to fill out all that paperwork? Yeah.

Can I say it one more time? Who wants to fill out all that paperwork? Yeah, that does. Second take really nailed it. I really like that. Hey, I know it's too late, but we're about to restart Big Mouth.

Wait, you're about to restart Big Brother? There's room for one voice. Really? Sort of a Scott Aukerman type. Oh, I like that. Like physically? Sort of like a Kermit the Frog type person. Yeah, Kermit presenting. Just the cuck of the Muppets. Well, I have to say, I have a pretty busy schedule. Okay. I'm helping a lot of people. I bet. There's a lot of grief in this world. A lot of people don't know that. There's a lot of grief in this world. Yeah. So you're too busy to go star on a cartoon for Netflix? No.

I mean... What is it? Sex Gale? This is Sex Gale. Oh, is it sex? This is most favorite nation sex. Now, I'm Taft Hartlead. Oh. What were you Taft Hartlead for? I was in the rookie that showed the rookie with Nathan Fillion by accident. By accident? Because I was crossing Bonnie Bray and Third. Okay. And actually... They were filming there? With Chunkles. And I was crossing and...

And I was crossing kind of yellow. I shouldn't have done it. I don't think that's the problem. They blocked off the street for filming, it sounds like. Well, I didn't see any of those. Like any cones or anything. Cones? Movie sets don't have cones. Exactly. Maybe they have cones, but when I think of a movie set, I don't just first off think of cones. I mean, I think of the Cone Brothers.

Oh, yeah. And the cone heads. Oh, they were great. They may, they, so anyway. So you just were caught on film. I was caught on film, well, they, the car hit

Oh. Which was bad. Okay. And I was like, forget it. Do you remember? And you remember this? Well, it didn't affect me because I hit Chunkles. Right. So that wasn't a trauma or grief for you? No, because Chunkles forgot about it right away. So how did you end up on the show? Because I was like, you hit Chunkles.

And then once I saw Chuckles was okay, and they were like, what could we do? Don't sue us, don't sue us. I was like, am I in the shot? And they were like, yeah. I'm like, do I get paid as a featured background artist? So if I'm watching The Rookie, whatever episode this is,

Season 7, episode 19. You are leading a man on a leash, a naked man on a leash, through a scene. A car hits him, and you scream, you hit Chunkles. And it doesn't have anything to do with the scene that I'm watching. Well, what happens is they cut a lot of... This is the brilliance of the rookie. This is the brilliance of the rookie. They almost like... This is when art imitates life. They...

They forgot about it. They forgot about it. Through editing. They cut it out. So all you have in the scene is me looking like this. Oh, I see. Where the car drives by, I go like this. They cut it out of the finished product. Like this. And so they kept it. They made the most of it. And Nathan Fillion has been on Big Mouth a ton. He's a recurring character. Genuinely. Genuinely a recurring character. He plays a lot of cops, I understand. So do I. But hey, curb your enthusiasm. Yeah.

He can integrate anything. He can bring anything in. So they use that moment of bait. I'm sure that when the car hit Chunkles, he probably was like, I don't know how to handle this. I'm just a rookie. And it just fit right into the show. I didn't read the script. But so then to me, that's not a traumatic memory. That's a great memory because not only did I get paid for the day, I got tapped out of the league.

So I'm like a must hire, which is so fantastic if you live in Los Angeles. It's a great deal. So is that going to factor in you restarting Big Mouth for the fact that he's a must hire? He is. Baked turf oil? Me tough, partly. So I got lunch.

Where'd you go to Joe's on 3rd? How long does this story go on? They're catering. I thought all the germane information we've already covered it, but it's still going on. With what? What did you ask? The story is continuing? Well, you were asking. No, we asked how did you get Taft Hartley'd. And I'm telling the story. What left is there to discuss? He went to catering. He got roast chicken. Would you get any greens? Sides? What'd you get? I go greens.

I go protein. You don't go carbs. This doesn't have anything to do with... You don't go carbs. You make a ton. When you go carbs, you start falling asleep in the afternoon when it's wrapped. So I just go... I go veggies. I go protein. Are you just going to continue talking until we get to the current moment? Well, we can. I just want to say, I'm genuinely interested in what your craft...

what your catering order is. I appreciate it. Do you do a big piece of cake in a bowl? Don't do the cake in a bowl. Don't do the cake. What I do is I get a sleeve of Nutter Butters. And what you do is you have a Nutter Butter every 15 minutes. That way you don't crash. Yeah, I was going to say my three of my siblings had a peanut allergy and I gave them a sleeve of Nutter Butters and they all passed. Oh, that's terrible.

Forget it. What are your siblings' names? Jeremy, Vanessa, and Dana. All right.

scratch those names from your memory forever. Okay. Because they'll only bring you pain if you think about them. Can I give them different? Should I give them different names? No, don't. They never existed. What if he wants to think about Vanessa Williams, former Miss America turned penthouse model turned pop star? Then that's the only the star of Eraser. That's the only Vanessa you... You know a lot about showbiz. I know you're a Taft-Hartley and you're a must-hire, but... I'm sorry I watch movies. But...

Are you? You have an encyclopedic memory for Vanessa Williams movies. I'm not allowed to be sorry. Oh, I'm so sorry. I can't be sorry. Right. Because there's nothing to be sorry about. Have you ever played the board game Sorry? I'm not good with dice. What do you mean? You just pick them up and you throw them? No. What is there to be good with? Every time I handle dice...

We always lose one. What happens? They slip out of your... People get hurt. You don't... Or I lose one. Bait doesn't remember. We've met. We've met multiple times. Bait has cut me out of his memory. What? But I know that I was friends... I don't remember you. I'm friends with the Turf Oils. And what we would do is we would play dice on Bait's life every night. What? We would roll dice. And... I don't remember this.

I don't remember snake eyes. Right. I don't remember. Remember where we kept the dye? I don't remember. And I don't remember. I had to take it out to poop.

So there we are. Wow. And it was, I don't remember that. It was a dungeon and dragon style 12 sided guy. Yeah. I don't remember that at all. And then Harmon did a podcast about you. Oh, you're what the Harmon Quest podcast is based on. Yeah. Oh, Angie Harmon? Yeah. Can you name one Angie Harmon project? Yes. And you can't say Eraser if she was in that. And you can't say Rizzoli and Isles. Okay.

Without Rosalina, she... Without Rosalina, it's tough. It's real tough. But I

you call yourself a fucking grief counselor i think she sat in for kelly rippa once in all right that counts it counts it counts she sat in for kelly rippa it counts all right great great great well bait turf oil this is a wild story but we appreciate you coming on can you stick around because uh we anywhere to be yeah well let me just check on chunkles because he's been in the sun for a while do we have any water well i see him

Yeah, Chunkles is... Looks like he's trying to bite through his leg to get out of the leash, but... Yeah, but he'll be fine. All right, well, let's tell you what. You catch up with Chunkles. We're going to take a break. When we come back, we have an animal. This is very exciting. Ooh! Yeah, so Bait Turf Oil is still going to be here. Nick Kroll is still going to be here. We'll be right back with more Comedy Bang Bang after this!

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Hey, everyone. Scott Aukerman here. I want to tell you about a HeadGum podcast that I think you might be interested in. Doughboys, that's right. Hosted by Mike Mitchell and Nick Weiger. Of course you know what Doughboys is. You know Mitch from his sketch group, The Birthday Boys. He was on the TV show Love. He was on the comedy Bang Bang TV show. And you know Nick from his other podcast, Get Played. He also has a very interesting

Interesting character that he plays on Comedy Bang Bang. On Doughboys, Mitch and Nick review fast food and sit-down chain restaurants around the country, diving deep into the merits of Popeyes versus KFC and regional fare like Din Tai Fung or Regina Pizzeria.

Each episode is a spirited debate, not just about food and the fast casual experience, but on everything from Disneyland's Pirates of the Caribbean ride to Hedgehog Cafes. Search for your favorite restaurant to find out its rating or listen to episodes with fan-favorite guests like John Gabrus, Nicole Byer, Judd Apatow, John Early, and maybe even me. Subscribe to Doughboys wherever you listen to podcasts and watch video episodes on YouTube. New episodes drop every Thursday.

Comedy Bang Bang, we're back here with Nick Kroll, Big Mouth, Season 8 out now, adults out this week. I don't understand you out the week after that. Nick, you getting one of those Hollywood stars, Walk of Fame stars, because of all this action going on? You know...

I'm trying desperately to get to be one of those, because I really think that was what spells success. It's like being on, people who are not in LA don't realize how glamorous Hollywood Boulevard is. Hollywood Boulevard, yes. Oh, it's gorgeous. It's absolutely gorgeous. It smells like a million bucks. They keep it so clean out there. They keep it so clean, and it's such a vibrant area. Mm-hmm.

It's such a vibrant part of Los Angeles. Yeah. And so to just be something that Dutch tourists step on or a homeless person...

relieves himself perhaps upon and yes it to be any of those things it's why we get into why we get into this is to be a sidewalk you think i'll ever uh uh make a little podcasting you know how uh uh when you're on the hollywood walk of fame like and they have like stan laurel and you see like a little yes film reel yeah there'll be a podcast or you see a little microphone for a radio like what would they do for podcasts like like an ipod i think it'd be hot ears underneath uh earphones

Like red ears. Yes, red ears. Yeah. And messed up hair for when we have to take the picture afterwards. Yeah, exactly. And I think you would be on that podcast walk of fame. I would love that. I'm one of the trailblazers. This is our 17th year. Holy shit. And this is your 48th appearance. We also have Bait Turf Oil. And what was going on with, who was it? Crunchles? Crunkles? Excuse me?

Oh, crunchles. Yeah. Crunchles. Fine. Yeah, he was biting through his leg. But, you know, his teeth aren't strong enough to break the skin. Yeah. So he's just a lot of bruising. Did you file his teeth down, you were saying? He does that a lot by just chewing on this leash a lot. Okay. But it is a... It really is... He's fine, and I gave him water, and I gave... And you put cones all over his body, like not only just around his neck, but on every appendage. Yeah, that's how he does it. Yeah. And his penis? I'm...

I'm seeing right here. A penis cone, you know what? I designed this penis cone because they don't make penis cones. Penis cone, this sounds like a big mouth product. And this is something that is so helpful for people who can't keep their hands or their mouth, if you have a craftmatic bed, off their penises.

Do you ever squish yourself up in a craftmatic trying to... When I was in the hospital... When I was in the hospital... What were you in the hospital for? I don't remember. Okay. But the only thing I remember from the hospital was being able to get into that bed and... And squish yourself into a BJ. I squished myself into a self-philosophy. We do an episode in Big Mouth Season 8 where there is like Andrew tries to get a bed that is... Really? Self-flatting. Art...

Imitates. Imitates. Garfunkel.

Life. Wonderful. Well, we have to get to our next guest. Hold on a second. Leonard Nimoy has a star in the Walk of Fame. I just wanted to say that. Yeah, deservedly so. And he's in the handprints in the Grammar's Chinese Theater as well. And so is the paw prints of Benji. Yeah, but does Benji have a star on the Walk of Fame? No, he can't use an ATM. No, because he can't use an ATM. Yeah, couldn't pay the $26,000. Can I ask, is Leonard Nimoy the Vulcan sign or is it regular hands?

I don't know. We got to go to Man's Chinese. We got to go look. We got to go to Man's Chinese tonight. Road trip! Road trip! The boys! Holiday road! Ridden by J.K. Rowling. All right, well, let's get to our next guest. This is, I mentioned an animal was going to be on the show, and I was not lying. Please welcome to the show for the first time, a goose.

Hello, everyone. Hello, Bait. Hello, Nick. Hello, Scott. Hi. Everyone get under my bosom. You guys cold? Absolutely. Yeah, let's do this. You guys hungry or out?

Are you spitting up some food for us? No, I was just clearing my throat. Oh, okay. I got snacks in my purse. Okay. Did you say purse or the other thing? I just have to check. Yeah. No comment. Okay. Well, what should I call you? Do you have a name? I'm a mother. I'm a goose.

Not Mother Goose. Not that one. My name is Pamela. Oh, Pamela. So nice to meet you, Pamela. What's it like being a goose? I've always wondered. Oh, man. My wingspan gets a lot of use, right? I travel. I've traveled. I traveled 2,015 miles to come here today. Wow. 2,015 miles. That's almost the length of the United States. Where are you coming from? Tennessee? I'm a Canada goose. Oh, you're a Canada goose.

I travel from Quebec. Oh, our friend from the north. Okay. This is a very, and people don't realize this is a very typical Quebec accent. Yep. Sounds just like the Turf Oils. Yep. Oh, the Turf Oils were Canadian. They were French Canadian, yes. Oh, interesting. And there were not a couple?

No, they, believe me, they were not. Okay, yes. They were not. Okay. Did you guys ever come into contact? A goose and a bait for a bear? Did you ever try to eat me? Well, I remember, I thought you were dead, actually, because they would just kind of tussle you around like a hacky sack. Yeah. It's good to know that you're well. Speaking of Woody Harrelson, yeah. Hacky sacks. So, what?

So you flew 2,800 miles to be here. Just to be on Comedy Banger? No, no. What are you doing in town? Anybody hungry? I am.

Are you just clearing your throat again? Oh, I'm going to sneeze. Twizzler! I would love a Twizzler, please. Are these French-Canadian Twizzlers? These are French-Canadian Twizzlers. So it's a little different sugar flavor. It's a Twizzler. And is it a maple sugar in the Twizzler? And lard. I mean, it sounds disgusting, but I'm here to tell you that it also tastes disgusting. But there's a secret ingredient because I'm a goose. What do you think it is? Your shit?

bingo wingo and mealworm so your shit and mealworm and so geese say bingo wingo when they that's a classic quebec term oh it's a quebec not just exclusive bingo wingo what is bingo wingo uh you got it's like it's like oh whoa you got it oh okay okay okay like right on the money it's like

Yeah, sure. Yeah. Okay. Okay. So what are you doing in town? If you don't mind me asking. I'm here looking for my son. Your son? I'm here looking for my son. Now this is obviously another goose. It's another goose. It's a baby goose. It's a Gosling. His name is Ryan. Oh, okay. Yeah. I mean, you might be thinking of Ryan Gosling, who I'm sure Bate- You know of him? Well, Bate, you probably know what projects he's been in and being a fan of. Well, he was in that movie Drive.

And he was in that movie, The Nice Guys. What are you talking about? And he was in, you know what? He gets a special spicy soup at Jitlada when he has a cold. Do you know what he was tapped Hartlead for? He was tapped Hartlead for a Nickelodeon show. You can't do that on television. His second, his first role. Mousketeer first. Wait, is this, do you know that, is your son the actor Ryan Gosling? He's Ryan Gosling.

The Gosling. I haven't seen him since he left. My husband at the time took him to get water and I never saw him again. Who's your husband now? I'm not with anyone. Are you looking?

Of course, but mostly just for a casual lay. Oh. Did you see what I did there? Lay? Excuse me. I don't actually. Is that a pun of some sort? Because I'm a goose. Okay. And you lay, oh, because you lay eggs? Forget it.

No, I really want to drill down on it. No, it's fine, Scott. Forget it. No, it was very funny. Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it. It was very funny. Yeah, I mean, laying goose eggs is a term, but that's not what's happening here. No, no, no. No, that's not what's happening here. Although you are laying an egg as we speak.

I am. Thank you. And when was the last time you saw Ryan? I saw Ryan by the river when my then-husband took him to get some water. And I had to leave to shake around my tail feather. I guess I'm asking for a date more than the details. It was 72. 1972? No, it was 72 hours. Oh, it was 72 hours ago. I was at the chicken breast stripping. Oh.

Oh. Because my husband at the time was a big spender. And you needed to earn more money to afford his lifestyle? So he could spend more money on strippers?

I couldn't meet his needs. I didn't know how to blow or kiss. Oh, wow. Let me just get this straight. You're a goof. I didn't know how to sell. You're in town in Los Angeles because you had a son named Ryan. I'm looking for my son, Ryan. He was a Gosling. I flew down on him. You had a wealthy husband that you were stripping in order to meet his needs because you didn't know how to blow a kiss. He spent all our acorns. All his acorns. Do I have this about right? No.

No. No? What a... You haven't brought up the joke that I made about land. You said it was so funny, Skylar. Can I ask... Is anyone hungry? I would love... Yeah.

This looks like a Twix, but is it a Twix? That's my esophagus. Okay, these are chips. What flavor are these? Kettle rum. Kettle rum? That's a very French-Canadian flavor. I've heard of Kettle One, like vodka. No, this is kettle rum. Kettle rum. Rum that's been brewed in a kettle? That's right. You can eat it in 12%! So you are a cinephile. You just made a Star Wars reference.

Oh, did I? Okay. Have I seen you in something? Have you watched The Rookie? I was in The Rookie. Only season seven. Yeah, episode 19. I'm in it. I'm glad I got in it.

For those of us podcasting, he's making a face. He's making a surprised face. Describe it exactly. So paint a picture. You're a storyteller. Paint a picture. I can't. I've already forgotten about it. Oh, look. I'm healing every day. The face was like when you wind up a jack-in-the-box and it pops. Oh. Yeah. I think that's... Or like that Billy Mummy episode of The Twilight Zone. I know he was in a few of them, but where he sent someone into the cornfield and you see the bouncing head. Is Billy Mummy the one who's like...

the guy from my blue heaven it's a pop open are you talking about Steve Martin the guy from my blue heaven no he's got a small part in that oh no no no the twilight guy who's like hey I don't believe so I think that's an older gentleman the guy from Princey's Honor is that who you're talking about I think so he looks like a mummy the producers yes he's the producers he looks like a mummy because he's so old

yeah billy mummy was a young kid in the twilight zone oh okay not a toast to failure uh ryan gosling i mean we're trying to determine we're trying to parse if your son is the famous hollywood actor ryan gosling sex yeah have you seen la la land i'm not familiar the big short do you see that i'm not familiar what about barbie not familiar

What about Lars and the real girl? I mostly watch trees. Behind the... What about in the pines? What about the... Yeah, that's trees. That's trees.

He's let me give you some descriptors and you can tell okay great. All right, okay, so he's my son Mm-hmm. He's about the size of a son. Okay. Yeah, okay got it. I'm drawing a picture He's always around around and around mm-hmm He's not a silly goose

Thank you. This might be Ryan Gosling, the actor. He's, I mean, if it's any consolation, if it is the Ryan Gosling that you're talking about, he's a very successful actor. Nominated for an Academy Award, I think. He's got a wife and so he doesn't talk to me.

He does have a wife, Eva Mendez, I believe, and children. And he seems very happy, and he's very well respected. He's never done this show, which is like a plus. Yeah. So just so you know, he's abandoned. He's left you. Right. He's moved on with his life, but he's doing well.

right you can let him go yeah you can just forget him his that's the easiest thing to do no he needs me he wants me to sing all the classic bird lullabies oh what are some of the bird lullabies i'm like a bird i only fly away oh nelly frittata free bird free bird no that's it you got it free bird free bird does does have to do you know blackbird

Blackbird. Yeah, that's it. I mean, that's close. Honestly, if you just stop right there. Oh, the Beatles. Yeah, yeah. No. Not familiar. I don't indulge in music. I indulge in the music of the wind, the seasons changing. Oh, that's beautiful. That's beautiful. Whoa, the things I get tangled in. Oh, you've gotten tangled up in wind chimes. One time I swallowed a wind chime.

because I was having a bad dream. This is like the six-pack plastic thing, rings around the six-pack for fish, right? Oh, don't bring that up. But for birds? That's correct. Wind chimes are extremely dangerous. Don't bring that up. Don't bring that up. That's, I just. Do you have a bad experience with the plastic rings around soda cans? I don't remember. I don't remember. Were you, as a baby, were you tangled up in one of these? If there was, I don't remember.

Okay, great. What else is going on? Hey, I'm a mother. You can let it out. Let it out. I don't, there's nothing to let out. I don't remember anything that happened. Can I say, Bates, you've never had a mother. And this is Pamela. Pamela's a goose who is a mother. Who seems to want to find a surrogate son. I could sing you all the songs. I want to get away. I want to fly.

So not just even bird songs. The song's about flying. Countess, fly me to the moon. Are you allergic to dongs? Did you say dongs? Well, he has a dong. He's a naked man acting like a dong. Yeah, he has a pet. Is that okay wherever you live? Yeah, no problem if it can fit in my nest.

Dogs don't really like birds. I worry a little bit about exposing a dog or a man that's been convinced that he's a dog to a bird. Yeah, dogs primarily, whenever they see birds, they freak out. They chase after them. Yeah, I mean, I've nearly died from a Shih Tzu, but... Is this going to be okay? What's his name? Crunkles? Crunchles? Crunkles? Crunkles?

scrunchels crunchels crunchels i think is what we decided on right crunchels it's crunchels it's crunch yeah of course it's crunchels no reason to rewind no it's crunch it's absolutely 100 crunch there's no doubt it's crunchels it's crunchels but it's a man who's a dog do you do voiceover work uh accidentally i did once well you you did well he's about accidentally like then what

Well, they were doing a Pringles commercial. What do you mean they were doing one? Like a radio spot for a Pringles. Okay. You know Pringles? They're like potato chips. I know the Pringles. But what are you talking about? They come in a tube. I make a really good Pringle. It's lava, barley, wheat, spit. That sounds like Pringles to me. You don't have any with you, do you? Oh, I do. Oh, my God.

Wow. You can really taste the spit. Wow. I'm glad the mics picked that up, by the way, because that was incredible what I just saw. I know. I love that you did a flip with it. So wait, they were doing a Pringles commercial and you just passed through the studio? Well, yeah. I was there at the studio. I just finished a session. A sesh, we call it. But yeah, go ahead. Well, I'm a professional, so I call it a session. Okay. And then someone was really sad because one of their bandmates OD'd.

So we forgot about it and helped them forget about it. Now they're a soloist. This commercial had a live band? Yeah. No, this was at a different studio. He was doing a session. And then they were having lunch at this studio. At the cafeteria. No, it was like they were having a catered lunch in the studio. It was a really nice studio. Yeah, you were in the Birds, right? You were in the original? The original, the band? Yeah. And you were eating at Birds? So I ate at Birds. I always get the burger at Birds. Yeah. And...

Just to be like, you know. It's the best cheeseburger in LA. Yeah. What about La Pubelle? How many times have you been to La Pubelle recently? La Pubelle, I haven't been recently. Sorry, was it La Pubelle? I haven't been recently because. Are you in the videos they make outside there? There's no one I can help there. No.

They all have their shit together. They all figured it out. It's amazing. It's like there's- No grief here. No grief whatsoever. It's really, I mean, that's why I missed the bourgeois pig. I cleaned up at the bourgeois pig. Let me ask you this. When you're going to Bird's, are you eating chicken and turkey? No, I get the cheese- Always gets the burger. I get the burger. Best cheeseburger. It's the number one secret in LA. Best cheeseburger in LA is at Bird's. Mm-hmm.

These are very specific references for a podcast that's listened to around the world. Randomly. Okay, brag a lot. Randomly, The Hungry Cat. Also a fantastic cheeseburger at a fish restaurant called The Hungry Cat. So are you just ordering cheeseburgers every single place you go? Well, I'm trying to get my cholesterol up. You are, by the way, we should mention you are approximately 650 pounds. I don't like to talk about people's bodies. It's okay. I thought it was germane to what we're talking about. No, it's okay. It's hard to fit you under my wings.

It would be, but I would keep you warm. It would, I'm like, I'm to be fair, I'm under 650. Yeah. I'm 649 and I- And you were talking about the movie The Whale during the break saying that it was aspirational. Well, I've always, I've loved him more

since George the Jungle. Is my son in that? He worked a lot before that. That's not like a brag. I love to... Since George... That was on the... When his career was waning. Well, that's when I... He came on my radar. That's when he came on my radar. I don't know what he did before that. I'm just saying, to be like, I've loved him since George of the Jungle...

I mean, yeah, there's a long time in between that and The Whale. You can like someone like Bob Dylan after Time Out of Mind and be like, not know that he did anything before that. I don't think that that's, I don't think it's possible to like Time Out of Mind without at least having some sort of, like if you just got some- You might be a big Daniel Langlois fan. If you just got like a CD-R and it just said Time Out of Mind and you put it on-

First of all, you would go like, oh, this is Bob Dylan from the voice. Unless you've never heard him before. Yeah, but just from being a person and from hearing comedians go like, ew, ew, ew, you would know it was Bob Dylan. But secondly, you wouldn't like it if you weren't like, oh, this must be Bob Dylan. Unless you liked the music he was making. Nick, back me up on this. I genuinely don't know anything about Bob Dylan. The geese love Bob Dylan. Yeah, because he fucking whines like them, doesn't he? Because he sounds like a geese Amber Alert. It's like, wah, wah, wah.

That's a good Bob Dylan slam. Yeah. He does sound like a geese. He sounds like a geese. Amber alert. That's right. Absolutely true. We love him. A voice of sand and glue. I don't know what you're talking about. That's what David Bowie said. Pamela, I...

You know, I don't have any advice for you. I know you probably didn't come on the show looking for advice, but... But you did get booked. Yeah. Wait a minute. Somehow you came here to find your son, but you got booked on the podcast. Well, I'm looking for work in order to stay here looking for my son. And Nick, I'm curious because you mentioned that there is a Big Mouth reboot. We were thinking about it. I was thinking... Well, we are doing a new show.

The team from Big Mouth is doing a new show called Mating Season about animals living and dating in the woods. Now, I saw on this email Netflix sent me that this is going to premiere in 2026. Yes. Right? So...

I'm trying to get ahead of it. Are you going to come back for that? Absolutely. It's a great opportunity to talk about how we didn't cast you in that one as well. I'd love for you to come back. We might open up the animatic. We might open up a color to get you in there. Put a goose in there. Put a goose in there.

Take a chance. Put a goose in there. Yeah, no, I need no real estate out here. It's so ridiculous. It's like 100 acorns for two by two, so I need a job. Oh, okay. Right, right, right. Yeah. And that's 1,000 square feet. I mean, for us, that would be 1,000 square feet. 100 acorns. One square foot is $1,000 for one thing. Yeah, so 100 acorns is about $1,000? Yes. Those are expensive acorns. And would you be paying me in cash dollars, acorns, worms? I'd be pouring you in loonies. I'd be paying you in Canadian loonies. Mm-hmm.

But hey, you might get them and go, this isn't a lot. It's actually worth two. So the transfer is great. Yeah, the transfer. It's worth twice as much. But don't transfer it at the airport because they'll get you at the airport. Yeah, exactly. So you fly, but then you still take commercial airlines.

I flew Alaska. It's a long trip. I flew Alaska. I had two layovers. I did a lot of layover in Newark, which was really good. I love it there. Yeah, it's a great town. It's a great airport, though. But it is crazy. So you don't fly. You made it sound like you're like, I flew 2,800 miles to get here. Yeah, I flew 2,800 on points. Technically, you didn't even pay for it. You paid for it with points. I paid on it with points.

Credit card points or airline points? No, points. Bugs. Bugs. Oh, yeah. This makes sense. It does make sense. Yeah, she paid for airline flight. Alaska accepts loonies with cash and bug points. And bug points. Well, this all makes sense, Pamela. And I wish you luck. But I have to say, we are running out of time, unfortunately, on the show. The only thing that we have time for is one final feature. And that is, of course, a little something called plugs. Oh, yeah.

Very abrupt ending. That was Plug Bag by Shoshin. Thanks to Shoshin for that. If you have a plugs theme, head over to cbbworld.com slash plugs. You'll find everything you need there to make our closing up the Plug Bag remixes. And also you can upload your songs there. And Nick, you have so much going on. What are we plugging? Plugging. Adults, big mouth. I don't understand you.

bing's ai bing's ai yeah yep and uh human uh human growth hormone human growth hormone yeah you've been on hg for a long time yep yep and i've been noticing the difference in you i mean some people do it naturally like uh you know and uh you instead of taking the other route no i and you can tell that my energy as the podcast has gone up has really flagged yeah

And by the way, acne is broken out just in the hour that you've been here. Yeah, acne is broken out on my ever-expanding brow. So anyway, check that out. Check all that out. And Bate Turf Oil, what do you want to plug? I'm going to be staring into the sun.

Cool. Thursday. What's going on with the son on Thursday? Is there anything in particular? I really want to just get my pupils as small as possible. Yeah. I'm trying to break a Guinness Book of World Records. Oh, that's cool. Fred Guinness is on this show. He's in charge of the records. Oh, is he? We should hook you guys up. I would love it because it's sort of a side hustle I have is getting into the Guinness Book of World Records. Oh, that's awesome. And have you reconnected with your father's... The Turf Oils? Sure, yeah. The...

If you need me to be more specific, yes. The turquoise. Well, I have also a real father who left me in the woods. And a real mother, presumably. And a real mother who left me in the woods. Have you ever tracked them down? I know 23andMe just went bankrupt, but maybe you could get in there before they... I didn't even think about that. I just got a text.

Whoa. Whoa. Can we act like we're on Love Island? I just got a text! Yeah, I just read it. It says, I got a text from Jack Nicholson who's listening to this live. Oh, shit. He would like you to know that he and Angelica Houston are your biological parents. Oh, my gosh. Maybe they conceived me during Pritzy's honor. That would be so cool. That would be so cool. 1985's Pritzy's honor. That fits my age. Yeah. Yeah.

Perfectly to a T. To a T. Wow. Wow, that's amazing. That could be real. Thank you so much. You're Hollywood rock.

Hollywood royalty. No wonder you're such a Santa file. I like the Lakers. Is that a good Jack Nicholson impersonation? Hey, it's hereditary. Hey, I like the Lakers. God, I couldn't even get a spinning image. Wow. Um, and, Pamela, what do you want to plug here? I will be stripping my bare breasts at Jumbo's clown room this week. Oh, and I'll be up doing V. Oh, cheeseburger. I've heard. Yeah, really good cheeseburger in LA. Fantastic tuna. I like it. Medium over runny. Oh,

Oh, and with my own eggs. An egg? With an egg on top of my own egg. One of your own goose eggs on top? Mm-hmm, with my own egg. And is this, can I ask, I have to ask, is this money going to go back to, is it going to you, is it going to go to your ex? It's going to go, oh, God. It's a toxic loop. You've got to ditch this guy. You've got to ditch this guy. I will, I will, I will. And I just got a text. You got another text? Yeah, it's Michael Bublé is your ex?

Oh, I love his Christmas album so much. I come immediately when he sings White Christmas. You know what I mean? I'm dreaming of a White Christmas. All right. Well, I want to plug, head over to cbbworld.com.

if you want to delve deeper into the world of Comedy Bang Bang, we have every single episode we've ever done ad-free. All new episodes ad-free. Every live episode we've ever done, that's over a thousand episodes of Comedy Bang Bang. Nick has been on 48 of them. Bang Bang. And we also have new shows like The Neighborhood Listen, College Town, CBB Presents, and Scott Hasn't Seen, where we watch movies that I haven't seen before and talk about them. Nick, you gotta do that show. The Muppets. I'll go do The Muppets. The Muppets movie.

We could do Big Mouth. Yeah. I actually, I do want to do an episode where I have the creator of something and we talk about it even though I haven't seen it. Are you brave enough to do it? Yeah. Yeah. Even, I'll give you my unvarnished opinion on it. Sure. All right. Great. All right, we'll do it. We'll do it. And yeah, I want to just plug that. Head over to cbbworld.com and you can get all that stuff over there. All right, let's close up the old plug bag. We are on our way.

And they need some clothes in. They need some clothes in. They need some clothes in. We all have our bags. Oh, that was wonderful. That was Shaboynt by A Comedy Ghost in My Sleep by Randy Smith. Thank you so much, Randy. And guys, I want to thank you. Nick, always a pleasure to have you on. Thank you. Always a pleasure. You're one of our oldest and most treasured guests.

Thanks for returning. So many characters that I can't do anymore on this show. Oh, yeah, but you have 81 that you do on Big Mouth. Yeah, if I'm going to get paid for it, I'll do it. And pick out your three episodes. When we did the Martin television show, we picked three episodes. And you had Martin on? No, we did not, unfortunately. But pick three episodes and we'll do that show. And Bay Turf Oil.

So wonderful to have you on. And I hope that what was his name? Crunchles? Trunkles. Trunkles. He was Trunkles. Right. I don't remember. It's giving me so much agita. Can I tell you why? I'm actually going to forget this. I looked outside. Trunkles is gone. He's gone?

Yeah, his foot's still there with a leash on the leg. Oh, no. Well, I'm not going to get into it. I've already forgotten about him. Okay. All right. That's it. Good for you. Yeah, I'm going to go get a cheeseburger at Bird's. Yeah, get three. Go to Bird's, go to that other place, and then Jumbo's Clown Room. Do they call them cheeseburgers there?

Well, that would be misspelling the word. Okay, I know. You're a stickler. Yeah, but it's not a bird. All right, all right, Bates. Go wander off and do another episode of television somewhere. Pamela, you're a must-hire now. Oh, yeah. Oh, Ryan Gosling, fall guy.

I know that guy. Fall Guy. Even a goose has seen Fall Guy. I love that movie. Is it your son? No. Okay. Sorry. Yeah, he's great. My son's a goose. You understand where the confusion is. Oh, your son is an actual goose. Okay. Yeah, okay. Well, good luck to you. I hope you find him someday. Yeah, this was a waste of my time, but thank you. Hey, it was a waste of my time, too. I say that about all of you. I had a great time. I had a great time. Yeah. All right, we'll see you next time. Thanks. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.

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