Beneath Dark Wings | Ep. 53 | Temple of Gloom: Part 1
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Welcome to Legends of Evandris. I'm Iris, and you're listening to Beneath Dark Wings. Here's what happened last time. Last time on Beneath Dark Wings, you were all in Barovia. You had seen Fiona Silverpine transform into a horrible abomination. It was awful. You killed her, and you were able to convince Ivar Silverpine that the...

that the response would be to join with the Barovians. - We didn't just kill her, we reduced her to ash. - Yes, that's true. You didn't just kill her, you turned her to ash. - It's an accident, I swear. - And you convinced them. You then freed Sofianna, the monster slayer, the Vistani, who was not very forgiving of the werewolves, but she left unharmed. You then met with the abbot,

who told you that you were wanted by the Keepers of the Feather. You then went there, you got your own Taroka reading that was very telling and very, basically confirmed, at least in Erevin Mardukov's opinion, that you were all fate touched. And you then also shared some secrets from the box of Rabinovia Von Zarovich, the hairpin box, the jewelry box,

and got a feather, which was allegedly used to be used as some sort of talisman for traversing the mist somehow to protect you from the dangers there. What else happened? Then Escher had asked one more favor to basically go to a place called the Amber Temple, which

where he's looking for something that could potentially help free and save his own Ravinovia, his daughter Ravinovia Vanzarovich. No physical relation. Didn't we also attempt to open a box with him?

Yes, that was the box that you just described. With the secrets. You also learned how Escher had turned into a vampire. Oh, yeah? That was fun. That was good. Such an instance. You put on your cold weather gear because everyone in the comments of any Amber Temple is like, well, actually, if you try to go to Solinka Pass in adventuring gear, it would kill you instantly. So I included...

I told you that I was just dressed just like a cartoon. I was just dressed in exactly the same clothing. Yes. Winter style. Exactly. So instead of my normal hat, I had a big red... You looked like Kenny from South Park. Yeah. And so you actually...

You actually ran across an adventuring party who did not burn cold weather gear and died instantly. You also encountered a cavern with a goat skull. You were stalked by a giant black goat, or a huge black goat of some kind, with red eyes in the blizzard. You then came across the bridge over Salenka Pass, where a massive rock ROC

flew over and you were able to avoid being attacked by it, but it landed on the bridge and then you saw it with six eyes and dark feathers and Pazuzu spoke to you. And when you crossed the bridge, his name was written three times in massive rock feathers. You then found the remnants of a...

- Of a barbarian, a berserker encampment that lives in these mountains that allegedly were very, or maybe not friendly, but could be bartered with. Perhaps offer protection if you needed to rest. You found them all massacred by what looked like spiders of some kind, yes. - Didn't we try to open a box?

So yeah, you open the box, you actually told some secrets, you learn how Escher... Derek is gonna get up and leave. He's writing in his notes, "Murder Andy." No, no, it's not murder Andy. That's a smokescreen. Get real close. It's Joker's rose on his thing where it sprays the thing that kills you. On his thing?

- The flower acid. - Yeah, where it's just acid and melts your face off. - Yeah. - It's a very child-friendly. - It spurts. - We're a mature stream. - It's gonna hurt. - Did we mention this is a mature stream? - Would you say that if he gets you that way, you were hurting for a squirt? - Oh yeah.

Legends of Avengers is cancelled. It's been a good four years, everyone. Welcome, everyone. Four years. Welcome to Legends of Avengers, our four-year anniversary stream. We open a box. Didn't we open a box? Can we get all of this fucking ice? They were killed by spiders. You then went into the Amber Temple itself. None of the flamed skulls had greeted you that normally wash over this place. That was an alarmed Escher.

You then found the shattered remnants of the amber sarcophagus that had once contained Drizlash, the Nine-Eyed Spider. And all of the signs you're presuming had basically led you to very easily deduce that Ravinovia had come back since and effectively fully freed Drizlash. And who knows what would have happened? Perhaps her power increased, right?

But he was freed from this sarcophagus. How do you spell Drizlash? D-R-I-Z-L-A-S-H. Exactly like it sounds. I believe so. There might be two Zs. An apostrophe somewhere. I don't fucking care. That's cool. I just drizzled in my pants. You're hurting for a Drizlash. Yikes.

And then you get to... Then Escher leads you to the library that was the lair of the lich that ruled over this place, Exothanter. He was a cool lich. He was a very cool lich. And it was there. There's a box and you had to open it. There's a lot of secrets. Escher revealed the story of coming back through that. I don't remember that part. Yeah.

Oh, Mike? No. Yes, Andy? Wasn't there a box I had to open? I think this is pertinent to the session. I had a friend named Enzo. Oh, I had a friend named Enzo. I also had a friend named Enzo. Oh, God. Okay. Okay. I'm going to edit out three quarters of this.

You had to be there, YouTube viewers. Please like and subscribe. Leave a comment about your favorite part of the announcements. Tell us about how we can't survive with some link to pass.

Well, actually, according to the rules, those are my favorite YouTube comments. Okay, what else? Oh, you encountered a horrible bone abomination that was the remnants of Exothanter and all of his flame skulls fused into some horrible, gigantic, magical...

bone abomination. Can't fix that. Can't fix that. We can fix that. It's going to take some tools, but we'll fix it. Exit. Exit. Exit. So we haven't actually tested the music, so hopefully we'll listen to one album. So they're all just dead then.

I mean, they've been dead. Were they ever alive? They were flame skulls. They've been undead. Flame skulls were alive. They're now fused to him. The skulls were the skulls of the wizard. He was a lich. Yeah, but I mean, like...

And Exothantor actually killed all of them. Was that on purpose? Did they do that to themselves? Or did you accidentally flame skull yourself? No, Exothantor did it to himself. He came in and killed them all. And then turned them into flame skulls. He's saying that. A lich is like a skeleton. Yeah, but he can move. Right. When we found him fused, was he moving? He's very threatening, yes. He's very threatening and alive. He's shambling towards us. We're about to have a boss battle. We're going to get destroyed.

We're gonna open a box. - I was gonna say, wasn't there a box? - Somebody get to the box! You look as all of you enter this ruined, shattered, burned library.

deep within the Amber Temple, the lair of the Lich, the cool Lich, Exothanter, you see a box. - No, I'm kidding. - No, for real this time. - You actually see through the bone and the swirling green fire and magic in the midst of this thing, you actually see a large,

gilded wooden box somehow immune from the flame that's inside. And within you see bits and pieces and trinkets and scrolls sticking out, rolled up, seemingly smashed together and fused into an abomination of not just Exothand, or not just his flame skulls, but also of his library and his lair together.

So the box is in him? It's inside of him, yes. Okay, because I was picturing it elsewhere. Those who saw Curse of Shreddion might recognize this box. How big is he? He's a large creature by rule size. And you see that as this bone abomination ignited into this ghastly green flame, it's

runs towards you with a strange-looking weapon made out of his own bones and also remnants and fragments of whatever skeletal creatures and beasts that he had under his command. He charges towards you with empty, unthinking, unfeeling eyes beside just this fiery hate. I need everyone to roll for initiative. Let's fucking go!

I'm going to use this dice. I'm going to use my new dice die. Oh, shit. He's far from us. I would say that you saw him shamble around there and he's coming down. I'm advantaged.

- Why is that? - Barbarians. - Good old barbs. - On initiative. - Yeah. - Okay. I need the 20 to 25. - And you won't have it. - Not a one. - Oh, 15 to 20. - 16. - Really? - No way. - Guys, we suck. - Well, we move very fast.

- 16 to 12, excuse me, 10 to 13. - 13. - Whoa, ladies first. - I'm last. - 13, 12. - Okay. - All of us are 13. - All of us are 13. - Just tell me who's going first. - Who wants to go first? I don't wanna go first. - Well, you're not gonna go first first, so I would just propose we go down the line.

- Iris? - Yeah, okay, I'll go first. - Yeah, let's go. - I'll go first. - Iris. - No, let's go this way. As the healer, it's better if I'm going after your turn. - So Caprice, then Lufty, then Iris, then Fee-less. - I say Lufty should go first. - Okay, I'll go first. - She should. - We've already locked it in. - No, we haven't. - Flip it. - Flip it.

- Flip it. - This is not your initiative, Andy. You didn't get a 13. - Flip it. - Twist it. Punch it. Cock it. - I'm going full Karen. - Shoot it. - Jesus. - Exit the answer's going first, of course.

Of course he is. Oh, I don't have a beverage. Oh, jeez. Oh, man. This is going to be great. Oh, you're approaching me? Well, I can't beat the shit out of you if I don't get any closer. Oh. Look at that. Asher goes dead last, of course.

The green limes match the-- I should have brought some more seltzers. It's a lime ledge, we're dead! Thank you. I can always make a run up to you to go pick up a safe way or whatever. We have eight million seltzers. We've got a ton. Okay. That is, that's that, okay.

So, you see this shambling, skittering bone monstrosity that's humming with this, not just fire, but this incredibly powerful arcane magic. As it just lets out this groaning, like,

And then you hear dozens of voices all wailing and whispering and howling within the crackling fire of this beast. So it is going to... I forget how I actually... I like that description. Voices wail within the crackling fire. Jesus. Yes, it does. It's exactly what happens. Well done, Mike.

Sounds like he's a writer or something. He is going to skitter 40 feet. He's going to leap off of this balcony portion of his library and move 40 feet. Zip legs. Actually, 50 feet, sorry. He's like floating.

He's like up in the air, floaty. So he's here. Does he look like Kelthuzad? That's what I'm picturing. But also like the bonus to him. Yeah, he's like a mix of them. You're killing Rich. You're killing him! You're killing him! Um...

- You know, I should have studied this 'cause it's been so long, I apologize. - No, take your time. Yeah, we can talk about the box. - We're gonna be here for like 13 hours, so we can talk amongst ourselves.

That would be four in the morning. So buckle up. Abby says, does y'all dip into Derek's heroin again? You know, that heroin is mine. But because Abby's on her phone, she actually asked if we dipped into Derek's heroin. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Are you all positioned of how you would have been entering the library? - More or less. - Yeah, more or less. - Toa might be closer. - I definitely would not have been inside. - Why don't we make ourselves like-- - Let's arrange it, because it's gonna be how I do this. - Oh, how I do this. And hi, Matt!

I would have been, yeah, I probably would have been somewhere in front. I missed your face. What about Escher? Where would Escher be, Mike? He'd be in front, too. He'd be in front, yeah. Oh, he'd totally be in front. We're using the Shredanya Mini for Escher. Yeah, if you break that fucking sword, I'll kill you. Oh, I'm gonna roll a d6 to see who he attacks. Oh, I'll never touch that again. Hasn't it broken already? It's broken like six times. You see as there are actually several arms coming out of this creature and one small

arm underneath the underside, extends a bony finger and it points it at you, Toa. And you see this sickly green fiery beam shoot out towards you as he casts Finger of Death. So you might just be dead. Which would be a really great way to start this fight. The first thing that happens is a Finger of Death. Yeah, it's calm.

Yes. Whee! Engage. We're gonna twist that. Thank you. Thank you for the twists. Better. You hope you don't die. 22. Holy shit! That actually passed. Plus nine. Wow. Yeah, that passed. That's a ton for you. So you're going to take half. Holy shit. Half of a buttload.

How much is it? So he hasn't even said anything to us. No, he's just here to fuck shit up. We just walk in the room and he finger deaths to us. He doesn't have any intelligence anymore in my mind. You don't know that, okay? He's like groaning and screaming. You haven't spent any time with him. You haven't asked him any questions. Yeah, we have to kill him. What do I have? He's like, let's play some chess. Everything's going to be fine. 34. I see you're made out of library. Do you know how badly Toa, Toa,

I'm trying to talk myself. Felix would want to play chess with Exothanter. Half of 71 points of necrotic damage. Half of 71? So yeah, half, because he saved.

as it crashes into Toa, as it whizzes past Escher and he dodges out of the way gracefully, as he's looking completely shocked and there's a sense of dread and sadness as he sees the work of very clearly his daughter, Ravinovia, but a level of power that he was not expecting. And he looks and says, this cannot be.

We have to kill him! And that is-- That answers my question. Oh fuck! Your flesh is melting when I hit you. You see now as it's a layer action, as this creature, you see all the skulls now that help make its body start chattering and start flying off the body as eight flame skulls.

What? It was a seven. Seven of spades. Oh. That's much better. That fixes everything. Eight, you can't handle with seven. Fairly an inconvenience. Ew. Good.

right away from us as far as possible. - And I definitely don't know, from a meta's perspective, if they all can cast Fireball. - I didn't fuck you guys that badly, don't worry. - That'd be hilarious. - Oh, come on, that would've been amazing. Okay, it's the flame skull's turn. I'm gonna roll eight Fireballs. You only need to make eight dex checks. - As they

Fill the room. We all got so next. And they surround you. And you see, as all seven, shoot a beam into the center on top of you. And you see them all connect and a fireball of green flame, as they are going to cast fireball on you. But it's not seven. It's not seven. They need to combine all of their abilities to use a single fireball. Someone in the YouTube comments is going to have something to say about this.

- Yeah, well, these are actually not flame skulls. They're exothantur abomination flame skulls. So homebrew, bitch. Dix, any saving throws from everyone, please? - Home, bitch. - Dix, you say? - That's where I'm at, man. - Please like and subscribe to the video and our channel. - Natural 20. - Very good.

So I think I'll pass and only take half of this damage. Which still isn't going to help me. I need to order new dice. Hold on, sorry, I'm checking. I might get toasted. Well, actually... Twenty-four?

24, DC's 13. Oh, 16. Bingo, let's go! Perfect, so you might roll on the sixth. 15, 20, 21 points of fire damage if you fail, and 21 points and then half if you succeed. So 10. And then they're also going to then use six fire rays on each of you. Ah, fuck, fuck, fuck! Seven. You mean seven?

- Well, I'm burning one of their actions. - Sorry, sorry. - Got it. - How much was that? - 21. - 21, so. - Yeah. - So they're each gonna actually use two fire beams on each of you. - Two fire beams on each of us? - Yeah, yep. - You said one. - No. - Oh, well, I meant two. - Wow. - Iris. - You locked it in first with one. - On Toa, that is going to be 20 to hit. Okay, that's gonna be fire damage.

- Well, did you roll for Iris? - Yeah, I missed. - Oh, my life. - Seven. - My life is spared. - 10 points of fire damage to you, Tom. On Felix. - I'm so glad that you guys don't harass me the way I harass Mike when he is doing that. - There's a natural 20 on him, but it is a flame skull. - Oh, yeah, no, I'm gonna let go. - You see what I did? I took 20 damage for 10.

So you take 10 damage from the attack? How much did I take? 10. Okay. Fire damage. Thank you. Because I have to be close to the person who attacks. That's fine. And I don't think I'm close enough. What is the fireball damage? 21. 18 fire damage to you, Felix. If you failed, it was 10 if you passed. Yeah. So yeah, and then 18 from the fire ray that blasts, that crashes into you. Yeah, that's going to do it.

The other one misses. Caprice? Wait, so who got crit on you? Me. Oh, Felix. No, I will. I would. I'll bash that. So I'd have that. Just have that damage. One's going to hit on you, Caprice. It's going to be a 21 to hit. You have to be within 30 feet of me, not those monsters. Got it. Eight points of fire damage. Two on lifting.

One's gonna miss, one's gonna hit. Fortunately, I'm a Typhling. No. Okay.

10 points of fire damage. Caprice, what the hell are you talking about? A Tiefling. One's gonna miss, one's gonna die. Like a Tiefling. That is gonna be four points of fire damage to you. Okay, that is a flame-scoop turn as they then skitter. Toa, you're up. That was a pretty good time. Yay!

I'm burnt. I'll, uh, I'll, I'm like, you know, my flesh is falling apart from the product damage and all this. It's just, it's just, it doesn't look good, but I'm gonna try my best and I'm going to, uh, rage and sprint up here and I will make, uh, two attacks, uh, recklessly because fuck it.

She's spread out. I can't even clean these guys up. This is... That was actually a really bad roll. I think I need to do... Oh, I am...

Dex saving throw, that was for the Firebolt. You take no damage? What was the damage we took, 10? 10. If you pass, you took 10. I did. If you pass, you take nothing because you do the Vantress thing. Yeah. All of my weapon stuff got removed from D&D Beyond. That's fun. That's very fun. Yeah. Well, you know, get back into it. It's an all-day session. Seven. Well... I...

I think it's an 18 to hit? 18 hits, yep. Okay. It barely hits, and now that you've hit it, you realize that his AC is 18. Okay, and then I'm going to attack again, just roll that. That also hits. And then, so I'm just going to do that. Do that. Roll that. Wow, that's really good. That's going to be 15, 19, 25...

28 points of damage. Okay. How many hits is that? That's for two hits. Okay. And then let me just see if I proc Windfury real quick. I need one of these, I need one of these.

And I do not. And then for my actions, let's see real quick. Oh, I reached. It's okay. As you smash into it, you hear bones cracking and flying off as you smash into this bone abomination. But with each hit, fire blasts out. You take seven points of fire damage from that attack. Oh, shit.

And with that, it's a legendary action. One of the arms that's holding this large bone scythe reaches out and it glows with a sickening green hue and attempts to cast, or not cast, use paralyzing touch on you. - You mean? - That is going to be a 21 to hit. Okay, you need to make a constitution saving throw as you take-- - That's good, you'll be all right. - As you take 12 points of cold damage.

Do I know the DC? No. Okay, it is a 15. 15 does not hit it. As your life is sapped from you. 12 points of frost? No, no, no. Cold. It was, hold on, let me just make sure. It was only 11 points. No, no, 12 points of cold damage. And you are now paralyzed. And it's because you have life, right?

- Oh my God, you're right, holy shit. - Thank you ZZ. Half cold damage for Goliath. - Oh yeah. - This is the first time I've ever cut cold damage by Toa because I didn't realize I was cold resistant until last episode. - Thank you Z. - I am going to rush forward and say,

Hey, Mr. Boney Boy, lay off of him. And I will bounce up here kind of between right there. So I am going to go straight for do we know his name?

- Yeah, yeah, he's-- - I do. - Esher has been saying-- - Okay. I'll still call him bony boy, but I am going to, I'm gonna just take my spoon out and jab him and just do a roundhouse kick and then two punches. - Okay. - And I'll use my flurry of blows.

Okay, so that is... 16, 17, 22. Okay, so two of them hit. Okay, this is 18. Okay, I get... Nice. Can I still do it? Yeah. Gracias. Gracias. Gracias.

Is that an eight? That is an eight. Yeah, the scarab is eight. What did you say? 25 damage. 25 damage as a smack.

and to actually whiz by as this massive creature is looming over you. You're gonna get five points of fire damage as you smash into it. - If it looks to be 25. - How many points of damage was that, by the way? - 25. - 25. - As long as they're not resistant to fire. - Yeah, like as flames. - As they smack into you. - And is that from being in range or from contact? - For each head, each head. - Okay.

- Okay. - So every melee hit that you do, you take one additional one of these six and I just roll it at the end. As it blasts into you, as it's then going to use its last legendary action to raise up its scythe and slice into you, but because scythe's also going to hit Toa. - No! - I'm gonna roll against both of you. - Oh wow.

Does a 16 hit either of you? Nope. Okay, so Scythe swings and you manage to duck. I'll duck down and pull Toa down with me. You drag him down as you hear this horrible screaming as the Scythe passes over you. And you're fully paralyzed. No, it's advantage, so we'll say it's advantage. And it crits if it hits. Yeah, no, that does hit. So you manage to dodge and it crashes right into Toa as it's...

crashes right into you, the scythe. I forget that he's like twice my height and I pull him down, but not nearly enough. It is an auto crit. I'm going to roll the crit slash first. I'm going to roll the slashing first. Okay. 15. 19. 21 points of slashing. Okay. 21 points of slashing. And then 13 points of fire.

Okay. And that's Lassif's legendary actions. And with that, it's Caprice's turn. Mechanical question. These flame skulls are flying, correct? They're floating. They're floating? Would they be impacted by destructive waves if I were to cast it? Because that's a...

that comes out for me from my... Yes, they're not super high above you. Okay. They're floating at about your skull level. About my skull level. Yeah, about your face. All right. First, I'll be like, yeah, go, Luffy. You skull fuck that bony boy. And then I'll start to sing. He sings.

Is it a magical effect that is making Toa paralyzed? Yes, absolutely. It's not a spell, but it's a magical effect. This song brought to you by Winnie, who wrote the lyrics. Somebody's gonna crit someone before the night is through. Somebody's going prone and stunned. Nothing we can do.

♪ Everybody wants to kill somebody ♪ ♪ If it takes all night ♪ ♪ Everybody wants to spill a little blood ♪ ♪ Make it come out right ♪ ♪ There's gonna be a crit hit tonight ♪ ♪ A crit hit tonight I know ♪ ♪ There's gonna be a crit hit tonight ♪ ♪ A crit hit tonight I know ♪ ♪ Lord I know ♪ - Yeah! - And I'll cast Destructive Wave.

- I love it! - Nice job, Winnie! - Oh, so I think I can hit in a 30 foot range everyone except for three because I can get to any of these with my 30 feet of-- - Winnie is such a muse. - Oh, absolutely. - I am the muse. - They need to make a constitution saving throw except for three. - Is it half damage? If they fail.

- Half damage if they fail. - Anyone who's hit is immediately a blast and shatter out. You can still roll damage if you'd like. Oh wait, will it hit X if they enter too or no? - No. - Okay, so it'll just shatter all of them. - No, no, no, no. - It'll hit X if they enter. - It will hit them. - Okay, he will make a constitution saving throw. - Did you make sure that Mike heard what you said? - I wasn't actually, it's not an auto-crit against me. - Oh, just have a damage drop. - It's not?

You'd be unconscious for it to be a crit. So it has everything else, but it has to be a crit. Exit danger fails, so calculate the damage. Okay, this is going to be 6, 12...

14, uh, 18 points of thunder damage, and 12, he moved, 12, 13, uh, 15, 16 points of necradian damage. 16 points? Okay, so he's not... Necradian. 16? Okay. And he, um, he failed. He's knocked prone. Oh, no, no, he succeeded. Sorry. Oh, he succeeded, so he'll take half of both of those values. Okay. Um, so we're actually gonna...

So, what's my... Oh, and that... Any attack that hits a creature is a critical hit if the attacker is within five feet of the creature. If it's a melee attack, it's an auto-crit. Thank you! Yeah, it's right there. Attack rolls are advantageous. Any attack that hits a creature is a critical hit if the attacker is within five feet of the creature. So it's just not ranged.

That's what I'm saying, like paralyze is super bad. Okay. Oh God, okay, you're right. Okay, smash into it so all but number three clatter to the ground in shards and the green light fire is extinguished. So there's only one left. There's only one left, number three. So can we get rid of those? Yeah, thanks.

And you'll notice that each of those art pieces, they're all different flame skulls on there. - I love that. - The action economy goes like this. - Well, for now. - Iris, you're up. - I am going to point my finger out towards Toa and I'm gonna cast Dispel Magic. - Okay. - Nice. - And get rid of his--

whatever's on him. Is this a one time or? So you reach out towards Toa and Toa, your life force has been sat from, you've been horribly rended. What was the spell level? It's a magical effect. Okay, so just auto-save. It gets rid of that. As you're horribly rended, gashed down your front by this horrible green flaming scythe.

and you feel the power of Anubis that releases you. And that is, anything else you're doing, Iris? - No, I don't have any bonus action, so that's it. - Okay.

With that, there is a sudden pulse of magical energy. And you see now that the flame, it's not just fire, it's this magical arcane energy as a lich. And all of the knowledge of the Amber Temple here pulses out. As you see now, there are some scrolls that are still...

that are still maintained in this library and one just tears and suddenly casts over, I'm gonna need you to help me with this effect. I'm gonna need someone to roll for me. - I will. - A 1d10. - 'Cause I love rolling, so I would like to do. - A 1d10. - Rollin', rollin', rollin'. Yeah! - A four. - A four. I'm then going to need you to roll a 1d8, please. - Okay.

- A three. - A three. Okay, that is going to be a four. And then I need you to roll a 1D2, please. - 1D2. - Yep. - So that's a D4. So odds is one and twos is even. That's a three, so that's a one. - A one, okay. That is going to be...

- Jesus. - It is a, you see as it tears and the sickly green magic rips out and blasts towards Caprice. - Lord, I know! - As Blight is cast, I need you to make a roll, a constitution saving throw.

Oh, that's where I-- Thanks for the follow, Twister. Aw, Twister. Thank you for the follow. I loved playing Twister as a kid. How many Twists we got? A bunch. Take one. Okay. That's what they're for.

- Wow. - Fame, fame. - 13. - 13. - Sometimes I like when that happens. - Thank you, ZZ. I don't wanna walk closer to him though. I want to be far away. - Yeah, not that much.

This is a very fun mechanic. I'm a big fan of this. This is very cool. Someone else can roll for the next one, because I'm sure it will come up again. Nah. 42 points of necrotic damage. Holy shit. 42 points of necrotic damage. Fortunately, that heals me for some reason. It crashes into you as the scroll dissipates. 42. 42. As it blasts. You're fucking shitting me. Felix, you're up.

Okay, seeing all of this go down, I grab my dagger. I'm looking at the poor misshapen creature ahead of me and my dagger will begin to glow. My eyes, and I'm gonna say, "There's no time to hold back." And my eyes are gonna glow bright white as seven

motes of light appear around my head and are pointed into like a very sharp looking crown, but it's floating above my head as I cast Crown of Stars. Ooh, there you go. Can I just quickly use my reaction to reduce the damage on... Yeah, if that works, yeah.

- Swirling spectral animals fly around you in reduced damage. - And then as a bonus action, I'm gonna sling one of the motes at Exothanter. - It rockets towards Exothanter. - So that's gonna be a D20 to see if I hit. - Seven. - 22 to hit. - 22 hits, yeah. - AC's 18. - Four D10 damage. This is radiant.

You said key tens, right? This is evocation, so I don't know if I get to reroll any of these. No, I don't. That's gonna be 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30. 31 points of damage. Okay. Nice. And I have six more uses of...

the evocation, so I'm going to then just take a few steps this direction as I'm like slinging the star. - You sling one out, it flies forward and crashes into it. As that happens, Escher runs forward and he says, "You are always crazy, I guess it's time to push you out of your misery," as he swings his rapier and makes two attacks and just deftly crashes in, one piercing and then a slice across

The flame does singe him, but it sends bone fragments flying. He's actually gonna rush past you and flank on the other side as he does that. He just glides right past. - All the way to the back? - Yeah, on the other side, yep. Okay, that's his turn. It is now Exothantor's turn. - He's not good. - He chooses to pass. - As, you're no longer paralyzed, are you?

I'm not, but I'm still reckless. So it's still managed. So you see as this horrible bone monstrosity moves forward and then almost levitates and starts to park, snaps around and just moves through you. Toa, as you're going to take...

Oh. So he's moving. Seven points of fire damage as you get burned as he moves through, he's gonna move to the center of this chamber that he's in. He's gonna move onto the bridge? Like here? Yeah, about there. About there, yeah. And do we get opportunity to text him? Yes, you will. Okay. So Escher and myself. Escher will. And Toa. I use my react. Oh. So you seize Escher, like, get back here, Exothanta! As he stabs Anne. And we'll do some damage there. I'm going to...

try to hook him with my spoon. Spank his ass. 17. That doesn't matter. It's automatic. You absolutely will hit regardless of what you roll because plus one. Exactly. That's why I did that. Let's go fuck him! He's gonna stop later.

I will indeed bash his skull in. Okay, you do that and you'll smack into it, taking, well, I'll tell you afterwards. Oh wow. Lufty just turned this battle map into a paddle map. He's really in front of my face. Eight. Six. Eight points. No, hold on. Equals six. 14. 14. Don't tell me, I almost got it. Sorry. My bad.

As you smack it, you're gonna take six points of fire damage. As you burst, you crack some of the bone away. I don't care. And the flame shoots out at you. And... I don't care.

All of the skulls that are still attached to this bone abomination all open, their eyes wide, and you see this, they all start chattering and whispering and groaning and moaning through the crackling, roaring flame, and you all feel your life force start to get sucked towards, as you feel this as if your souls are trying to be ripped out of your bodies. I mean, everyone, 'cause it's within 20 foot radius. Is this a spell? Yes, no, it is an ability.

I disrupt life. That sounds bad. Kahn's using saving throw. I don't know if that matters to you. Man. Oh, baby! I think I got a 20. Yeah. Well, I rolled pretty poorly there. 22. Kahn? Oh, no, I have way more than that. 25. I forgot I'm proficient in Kahn. I will fail unless I use a twist.

- Yeah, that's fine. - You got him? - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Let's find out if it was also written in the stars. It was. - Fuck. - Damn. - You got higher than a 16? - Me. - So who failed? - I'm gonna have these fucking spicy ones. - 26 point of a chronic damage if you failed. - Oh, we all do it. - Okay, sorry. - Oh no, half of you succeeded.

- Yeah, you'd have to succeed. - That's how much? - 26 if you failed. - 25th of what variety? - Necrotic. - Thank you. - As you feel the dark necrotic energy, rip a little bit of your life force out. - Ow, my life force! - And that is his lichy ability, and then with that it is a lair action. And because I can't do two in a row,

You see as the flame skull is going to, having still life, you see a beam shoot out, fireball. Everyone, can everyone get hit by the fireball? - Probably, yeah. If he hits X-Advan or two. - I didn't know he had to kill the last one.

Can it be like a tiny little fireball? If one is up. I thought they only had to be alive. Everyone needs to make a saving throw for me. All right, all right. I'll admit that I made a mistake, I guess. All of us, right? All of us. Yeah.

I roll poorly. Natural 20. Natural 20. That's three ones. 19. 3, 5, 10, 10, 16. Oh, ticket. 22 points of fire damage if you failed. No. DC's 13. And 11 if we... I succeeded. I succeeded as well. As it bursts out. 22, 11, 5. Evaded.

And then... I'm gonna roll to see who it attacks. At least it's warmer. He's gonna rocket towards Toa, both of the fire blasts. Or actually, no, only one, but it doesn't matter. They can't hit you because they both roll terribly. So two fire blasts shoot out towards a different side of the room, and it continues to chatter, but it's going to just float there as it misses. And then... Let's see what other layer actions there are. Mm-hmm.

I'm going to roll a d6. You've fixed it. Okay. And that is going to be on Lufting. And with that, you feel a... Who was that? Who was this? This is Exothanter's using a... Or it's a lair action. Okay, he's just finished. It is not an attack. Damn it! As you feel... I knew the rules. You see this snaking tendril.

of a life force after you just ripped out your soul. It's now connected to him as a cord, a tether is formed. Oh, good. And it just happens. And whenever he takes damage, you need to make a con saving throw or you take half of it. Oh, I'm going to kill Lufty outright.

That's not good. This is not a spell, this is just a... It's a layer action. Fuck. It's a layer action. But is it magic? It is magic. More like un-layer. Okay. Like unfair? That is... But you know, if she succeeds all of her, she takes no damage if she succeeds the con saving throws. So... That's it. Tell her you're up. I love that. Don't have to!

- And we don't know that it is this. - I was gonna say, we don't know this. - No, no idea. - So it should not affect what you do. - You now see this soul magic, it's this ghastly light grooming tether that is now tethered as a banter to Lufti. - I'll save you, Lufti! - Is it life transference, essentially? - No, it's a Lich layer action ability.

I'll run up not knowing. I'm gonna try to just do a lot of damage to him to help both of you. - Thanks, Toa. - That's what you would do. But make sure you roll all of your attacks separately because she has to. - Yep, yep, so that's the first. That's the second, both hit. First one. - Kels, on brand, you're gonna die during the boss battle. - I rolled a two, but to who it attacks, I'm sorry.

- Just so everyone's clear, one, two, three, four, five. - What's your power attacks? - Six is Escher, seven is Exothanter. - You don't know, you don't know. - 10, 20. - Stop metagaming, Derek. - 20 points of damage to the first one. - I can know it if I want to. - Con saving throw. - You're not allowed to know that. - I'm not gonna use the information. - What? - Con saving throw. - Just one? You only hit once? - Just the first attack.

23. Yep, so... 7 damage for the second. Oh, her con is 8. But I have 8, so she's...

Do I feel, even though-- You feel that it is a pulse, and you feel like something is trying to rip your soul out. 17 points after that. 17. And DC 16. OK. So you got a 17. Yeah. So I pass both, and then do I still take damage? No. Oh, OK. No, you take nothing. So that, if you'd have met the-- So the 20 and 17 damage, you got both of those? Yep. But I feel that, like,

- But you don't feel bad? - I don't feel bad, I'm just like, "Ew!" - You feel your life worth trying to be sucked out, but you're managing to-- - Hey! - With each pulse, with every Toa hits, pulse of this attempting necrotic pull at your soul. - Toa, that feels weird, stop it! - Are you good, are you done, Toa? - I'm trying to sit, wait, should I not attack him? - I will say, and-- - I don't know. - Let me just turn my inventory real quick, see if I have any potions to-- - You take seven points of fire damage. - Whoa. - Do I have any left? - I don't think any of us have potions.

I still have that Revitalizing Brew. I have one greater. I have a potion. No, I'm out. Because Escher gave us some, right? A while ago? I have a potion. I think I used mine. Yeah, I mean, it's possible. I actually have a bunch of potions. I think Escher gave us... I think Escher burned some. I have three base healing and one greater.

- 'Cause I never use them. - Yeah, Mike, I'm done. Okay, I am not going to use a Legendary Action here because I don't know what to do and I don't wanna slow down combat. With that, it is Lifty's turn. - Oh, Jesus. Okay. - I don't know what I wanna do. - And for the sake of the metagaming, you will have this tethered to you until initiative count 20, the layer action next round. So it's not anything that you can save against right now. - Okay. Ooh, I don't know what I'm gonna do.

Attack him. I guess, but I'm like, I knew that felt weird. Maybe I just didn't attack hard enough, Toa. So I'll just run up. Is this anything that I can, like, touch?

As you pass through it, no. It's just kind of a spectral energy tether. Okay. And you can put your hand through it and it feels really gross, like something's off and maybe slithery against your skin. And cold. And definitely cold when you pass through it.

but it moves with you. - I'll go up and just try to like, chop it where it attaches into him to try to like, in my head break the feeling. So I would just make my two attacks. - Two attacks. - Which are 18. - No, 19 and 17, so one hit. - Okay.

Five, eleven. Eleven. Two points of fire damage to you. As you smack into it, make a constitution saving throw for me, please. You succeed. Okay. You feel that pulse again. You can use a bonus action to do melee attack. Yeah. Sure. Would you do it if you didn't have this tether?

Yeah. Yeah. No, because I probably also would have forgotten that I had it. That's fair. That hit. Metal hit, roll damage. You're going to take an additional... Nine. Five points of fire damage. And then roll your mega-con saving throw. Hit. Nice. Uh-oh. You'll then have 161 damage. Wow. So you take half of the damage you just dealt. Okay. Which is a five.

- Okay. I dealt five? No, no. - You dealt, so you'll take five. - Half this pack, okay. - You'll take five. - 'Cause you did 11. So now...

I'm like, ow! - Did that hurt? - Now my brain connects. - Yeah, as the three, there's three skulls climb on the head of this creature. They all start shattering and he takes this massive sight and begins to spin around and around and around as the-- - Big storm! - As he spins around and around and bone fragments fly out, flames burst out all around. I need everyone to make a dexterity saving throw. - Dex you say? - Yep, DC 16.

- Natural 20, that's a 30. - DC 16? - DC 16. - 17. - I failed. - Damn. - If you failed in slashing and fire, you're gonna take slashing and fire. - Great. - So the slashing damage is, so team slashing. - Okay. - And the fire damage is,

13 fire damage and you're knocked prone and pushed back 20 feet from the burst of this arrow. - But if you pass? - If you pass, you take half of the damage. - Not me. - You don't get knocked prone, you don't get pushed back. - So I'll take 15. - So if you fail, you're prone and 20 feet back. And it's slashing, correct? - Yep, slashing.

Who else? I think just Felix. Okay. That is Legendary Actions. Caprice's turn. Thank you for the twist. Thank you for the twist. Ready? I have CC. I've been rolling at advantage. That's the only reason I passed last time. Capriccio. Capriccio.

- Seeing Felix immediately blasted against the wall in such a rough and harsh manner. - You got this, Felix, get up, buddy, get up, come on, you got this. - I'll give you inspirationes. - What level? - Or dice. - 1d10. - Let's go. - I can't wait for that on Jericho.

I have an action. Oh, actually, I know where it is. I'm going to pull out my Circlet of Blasting, hold it out, and I'm going to enjoy three Scorching Ray attacks. I have to make a ranged spell attack for each ray, and on a hit it takes 2d6 fire damage. And I am going to figure out what my spell attack is. It's plus 10. I'm going to target the first one against the Flame Skull in the corner.

That's going to be a 22 to hit. Okay, it'll take one plus damage. It'll blast into it and do absolutely nothing. And the other two... It's alive. Oh. It's immune fire damage. Oh. As it blasts in and it just... It flares up the green flame and then shrinks back down.

But does it heal? I turn my blasting sort of lit. It has one hit point, but a really thick hit point. That is one thick fucking hit. No, no, it goes through the mouth, but out the back of the skull, just like clean passes right through the hole. Oh.

I'll turn the other two to Exothanar, realizing that I've made a huge mistake. 26 to hit. If they crash into it once again, Exothanar's immune to fire also. It's immune to fire damage, yep. Well, I have wasted my turn. And I guess I'll be singing while I do this. No, I'm not going to waste a song on that turn. That's miserable. You'll all have to wait. Oh.

Fuck! I'm really hurt. Oh, God. Oh, fuck. Oh, I can see my own intestines. Jesus. Iris, you're up. I am going to...

I'm gonna do a Sailor Moon charge up stance and point towards the sky. I'm just kidding. The next 60 seconds of combat is her just spinning, her clothes explode off of her body and she's suddenly wrapped with a new costume while some pop song plays in the background. So we can't see anything. Oh yeah, yeah. And I am going to summon a Celestial.

I'm going to summon a guardian of Anubis with my six level spell slot. Holy shit! And so-- Tower spell. Fuck off. And it is a large celestial and it is in the form of a jackal-headed man, very similar to Anubis. So an Anubian guardian. An Anubian guardian. An Anubian guardian will appear. And he is going to appear immediately in front of me and in front of, what's his bones? And he gets to go first. He's large.

Do we have anything from Kimma's one-shot we could use? No, but I have my little Anubis pin. Yeah, use your Anubis pin. Yeah, let's use my Anubis pin. And he gets to immediately go on my turn. And he gets to make three attacks because I cast it at a six level. Oh, wow. Anubis Omnom. Yeah, so he's going to do that. And he is the defender, so that's a meaningfully important...

It's a noobus! That's a very cute Anubian guardian. It's adorable. Where is my other d10? There it is. Have you checked your butthole? Bidap bidap butthole. I'm so glad I'm hungry. Bidap bidap butthole. Ace is 18. That is...

Oh, I should probably roll that. Let me do this damage because I'm going to hit a hole. Because I already rolled the damage. It's the wing. I'm going to write that down. Okay, so one of them isn't going to hit. Just combat stuff. Okay, so two of them will hit. So I have to take out most. It's a big...

Blow him off, blow him off, blow him off. So he is going to take 38 points of radiant damage. Wow. Radiant? Yes. Can he take damage and does he have hit points? He does take damage and he does have hit points. He probably stabbed one. He does. And he is also, as a defender, going to give...

How many of those hit? Were those two attacks that hit? Three? Two. Two.

Six temporary hit points to Toa. - Okay, so you see the shimmering, jackal-headed Anubian guardian appear. He stands large. It's just basically Nasus from League of Legends. And he smashes into this bone creature twice. He's gonna take six points of fire damage as it blasts. He's semi-translucent. - He is resistant to fire damage. - Lovely. - No, he's not, I'm kidding. - Anything else?

- No, that's my turn. - Anyone else wanna roll now the scrolls? As the scrolls shift. - I wanna do it. - Okay, roll for me, Kels. As a scroll tears and rips, I'm going to need a D10. - You said it was six? - Yes, it was a fire damage. - Three. - Three. I'm going to need a D8, please. - Welcome, Fireball. We're fighting a horrible lich in our foundation. - I am going to need you to roll a D2.

- Yeah, watch how poorly it flips. - One. - Great, one. - That was perfect. - Shut up, you're my boyfriend. - Three, two, one. Hey, that's gotta be Luffy. - Three, two, one. - How much speed does it have? - You see as it rips out and you see these actually golden gleaming light that shimmers and casts on top of you, Luffy. And it shimmers as you are granted the spell Crusader's Mantle. - What? - That seems positive.

It is a positive, yep. Yay! And with that, let me... Crusader's Mantle? Crusader's Mantle. If you want to also, like, just so you have it, you can Google it. This is a mantles world! Thank you, ZC. And I'm also going to give temporary hit points to...

I'm going to give five temporary hit points to Lufti. Oh, thank you. You're welcome. I'm sorry I bitched at you. While anyone is within 30 feet of Lufti, you deal an additional 1d4 radiant damage. Damn.

- Wow. - VB corrected me. My guardian gets to do temporary hit points every time he hits. So it's temporary hit points galore. - That's pretty good. - That's really good. - Yeah, every time he hits. - So you all feel, you see the presence of the celestial that's suddenly standing here and Escher looked and he's surprised as he's chasing after the thing. And then suddenly you feel this radiating crusader's aura that radiates from Lufti after a scroll is ripped.

and washes over her. Caprice looks back at Iris as this amazing Anubis defender is bestowing temporary hit points to all of his party companions, still holding his intestines in, barely conscious. Iris will look towards Caprice and quickly look over him towards Felix lying on the ground.

Felix, you're on the ground, knocked up against a bookcase. I'm gonna stand up. I just said it last turn. Use a bonus action to sling another mote of the old fire. I'm gonna cash in on the inspo. And rocket towards it. Rockets towards it. Well, I guess I should roll first. Yeah, roll first before you can't attack. Oh, do you roll for the Nubian attacks?

- Huh? - 19 hits. - You need to roll two constant damage. - 19 hits? - 19 hits, yeah. - Okay, I'm gonna keep this. - Two constant damage. Do you look like-- - So that's gonna be 4d4 radiant damage? - No, radiant. - 4d2 radiant damage? - Thank goodness. - That'll definitely pass. And what is that, 14? - I can roll one. - 14 will fail. I don't know if you remember any of the hits or just roll another attack for him. Just roll damage for another attack. - Oh! - And then just have us 11 is 29.

30, 31, 32, 33, 34. 34 points of radiant damage to-- Okay. Did you add the extra? 14, so seven. I'm not within 30 feet of you. And it's only for weapon attacks. That's my bonus action. Oh shit, okay, yep. As my action, and I'm gonna need you to describe how I feel, I am going to look inward and figure out how I can channel the iron oppression of Dis. As I look at this creature and it must make a,

a intelligence saving throw. Int. I'm hoping that basically has no end at this point.

Oh, good point. I'm hoping. You remember the gaze of the creature that had appeared before you in the chamber after destroying Rajani and Caprice came back to life. And you just think of that form. You think of its gaze. And you channel that infernal darkness within you, the darkness in the hearts of all men. And you're able to, you feel like you can pull that power out of you. I lied. It's a ranged spell attack. Okay, yeah.

Which is better because then it makes it into saving throws on its turn. 17 plus 10 is 27 to hit. Battle hit. So it's going to take 3d10 force damage. You look so apprehensive that way. Plus intelligence. Holy shit. Okay. It was close to cocked. It was almost cocked, but it was... 19 plus intelligence is 5. 19 plus 5 is 24. Exothantor goes prone and he's paralyzed.

Oh! Or he's just prone. I think he's just prone. Nox prone, and effect by the repressive force for one minute. So he'll take 24 points of force damage. Okay. And then he's prone. Nice.

- So you guys will have advantage on melee attacks. - As you see this bolt of what looks almost like fire, but you hear the rattling of chains actually, as these infernal chains glowing with orange and gray rocket towards Exodantor and then wrap

around him and slam this bow monstrosity into the ground. You feel that radiating infernal devilish magic pulsing from these chains. - Does it make, do I feel like badly? - You feel like a darkness, like there is a dark bit of, and you feel the iron boot of Zurn and Korvac'ia, like that turned up to 11, right? Of just the full of this realm of the nine hells. - Do I need to save for that? - You do.

Have I told you the one about pineapple juice? He would never say that. Asher is going to run into the room and just get in between you, and he says, How's everyone doing? And he's going to attack again and again, and he's slicing into it, his bone fragments. Do that. He says that? I'm like...

- Brace, pull yourself together. - I have to pee really bad. - Oh my butt. - Is it a shrimp? - No. - Oh God, please. - You gotta give him the shrimpy. - You're upsetting me. - Oh, this is really, I'm just gonna do it. I am going to need, I'm gonna roll the DE six. - Sure.

Thank you for the follow, Beowulf. Thank you for the follow. Great name. And you're going to see as the main head, which was the skull of Axothantor that has this position of power, is going to chatter out and it's going to cast its eyes on you, Iris. It is going to chatter and you hear a voice call out,

Speak in some horrible language you don't understand as you cast Power Word Kill on you. I will cast Counterspell at a fifth level. I presume that that's what you'll do. It's a nice little spell. So what do I have to hit then? 19. Holy shit. I'm going to try. Do I add anything? I add my end.

Casting it at higher levels also increases the roll, doesn't it? No. That's why I don't ever know. Why would you cast it at anything but third in a list? So you can automatically nullify it. If you cast it at a ninth level, you'll nullify it. Oh, that's right. So if you're going to sort of third level... It's sort of fifth level. It's the only thing I have in it. It's a ninth level spell. In this case, it doesn't. This is an ability check, so you can use your inspiration on it as well. So I get to add five, and depending on how it goes... I lost Derek's 1d10.

You got ahead of 19. I believe. I hit it. Oh. Okay. As it passes. As my bookmark glows. Yeah, and you do that. And I wave my hands. And it says, I'm no longer a cool lich. I'm a cruel lich.

How long are you gonna hold that? All of the skull mounts are moving at the same time, right? That is his power word kill. It's in a horrible language that none of you understand, but that's what he's saying. Iris, like, begins to pass out for a second, and then you come to him immediately. And then, Felix, you grab your dagger and cancel the magic, and that is... Fucking...

It's your day! VIP. That is his turn. Is that what it's called? Very important person? Yeah. Yes. Layer action. All of the fragments on the ground. One of the previous adventuring parties learned this the hard way, that the flame skulls can reform themselves, and they all do. They all lift up and reignite surrounding you. Do you want them where they died, basically? Just surround the party, basically. Okay.

On the walls, basically. Yeah, the farther away they are, the more they thrust the kill. They don't-- they're ranged, so they don't need to be-- Yeah, they chatter, and yeah, they don't have to be around the walls, but just-- and they chatter, and a single fireball will-- everyone make a-- I think, except for Felix-- Four ranged-- Felix is out of range. --so we can hit him. But everyone except for Felix will make a dexterity saving throw as the beans explode into a fireball. Everyone make sex-darity? Sex-darity. I love sex-darity.

What's the DC? DC is 16, I think? 13, sorry. Okay, passed. AC, DC. AC, DC. 3, 6, 6, 12, 14, 15.

14, 17. So that explains the oil. 20 points of fire damage if you failed. Half of you succeed. And then I'm going to use the double flame beams on everybody. I'm just going to go down the line here. How much damage was it? 21. On Iris, it's going to be... Is this the lair action? Yes, it's the lair action. A 17 and an 18. 18 has. Okay, so you're going to take...

Ten points of fire damage. Lufty, down the horn here. 19 and 24. Shut up. This is gonna be in fire damage, of course. 10, 20, 27 points of fire damage. Fuck me. They blast Felix. That is going to be a 21 and a 19 to hit. They both hit. Okay. Oh, my reaction.

- But I'm glad that Iris is a one. - Is it a missile? That doesn't count as a missile, right? - No, no, it's a bolt of fire. You can't catch it. - Man, I wish I could. - You try it, that's why you take the damage. You take double damage. Your hand takes damage and then it smashes you. And you feel the tether drop, by the way, on you. So on Felix, this is going to be, sorry, 18. - Oh, I'm free. - 26 points of fire damage to you.

To Felix? To Felix, yep. And then on... This is the lair action? Caprice, yep. This is the old flame skull they're shooting. Caprice, one's going to miss, one's going to hit. To that one, I will say to that skull, hey, flame skull, fuck you! And I'll use cutting words to subtract it by 1d10. Okay, so it is... It's a 17.

Or no, an 18, sorry. It's an 18, so I automatically succeed, because my AC is... 17. You say "fuck you" and it's... Don't fuck this up! Oh fuck! They're actually all laughing from the cruel lit joke that they understand in their horrible, eldest language. And then two on Toa. One's gonna miss and one's gonna hit. It's gonna be 22, and you're going to take six points of fire damage.

Okay, that's the lair action's turn. And you feel once again, Lufty, the tether dissipates and fades. Your life forges no longer connected to that next thing. Oh hey, I'm actually good again. He's been chained down. Oh, that's right. I will not reckless the attack. Yeah, he's chained. You get advantage from that. I will make these attacks power attacks, because fuck it, why not?

These will be... I'll look at that later. That will far. There, I kicked it towards you. This is one attack. Oh my god, what's this? Gross, watching you molt less fat. 40. Power attack. So that is a...

- You and I did that for way too long. - That's an 18 on my first attack. - I got problems. - We all got problems. - Can I twist this? - Yes. - 18 damage? - No, no, no, 18's a hit. - Oh yeah. - I just wanna make sure that I-- - 'Cause he's 18. - Okay, so that's two hits. Roll damage, let me know how many hits though. - Okay.

- Rich's turns don't make any fucking sense. - I know. - Okay, first I'm gonna roll for the first hit. Oh, it's a Leviathan. - 17 plus 40 is what? 17, 57,

63 points of damage from two attacks. Okay. We've got to be getting pretty close. Well, you're going to take four points of fire damage. 63? Well, you're going to... And then let me just see if Windfury procs real quick here. Probably not. Nope. And... Okay. Yeah, as my bonus action... Oh.

Oh, I totally forgot about my Mantle of the Lion King. I'll start using that. Mantle of the Lion King? No! Come in, y'all!

Okay, you smash into it as the chains of Dis are pulling it down. It is effortless now. You see the skull that had once loomed up above you, despite being able to reform. You see that perhaps if these were normal chains, it could have just reformed around him. But you see almost like this dome of infernal hellfire magic that's keeping it down. Did he take a turn? He did. So he could have gotten out of it. Oh. What's his end? Is his end really bad?

It is weird, though. Out of, what, his chains? Yeah. If he breaks out, then I'll just, I'll recklessly attack, which is fine. Sorry, Mike, I just missed that you had taken a turn. No, totally fine, that's my fault. So it does, he does break out of these chains, but you still hit him all the same, and does all the damage. He's looking incredibly rough. As you see, the bone fragments are, he's cracked all over the,

The eldritch lichy magic and flame are losing form. - An extra six points of radiant damage. - Okay. - Lichy sketchy. - From the crusader's mantle or strike or whatever. He's looking even rougher. Okay. Twitter discord, I don't know if you did Beowulf. We hope to see you again. Toa, Lufty you're up as he looks very rough. - Oh, he does? - I want Lufty you're up.

I am going to... Is he still like... I will say yes, he has legendary actions. That's true, he does. I have to do that. He does, he does, he does. Let's hold. That's factual. It's a sack of blood. And you're going to all feel once again as your souls are being ripped from your bodies. He casts drop life, everyone except for Felix.

has to make a calm saving throw for me. Oh, fair enough. It's the circle of lich, and it kills us all in the circle. Elton John, what did you get in you? 16. 17. 22 points, DC 16, 22 points of necrotic damage if you failed. Oh, that is-- If you failed, 22? 22, yeah.

- -

So 10 if you succeed? Yep, yep, yep. As the horrible, your life forces are ripped from you. Hold on, hold on, hold on, before you do that, Caprice. Wait, wait, no, no, no. What? So you said it was 22. 21. 22, yep, and then 11. So it would be 11. I apologize, apologies. Reduce it by 14, Caprice. Okay, so it's 11. It got 21 in my head. It was 11 if I succeed? It's 11 if you succeed. I succeed, and I reduce it by 14. Do I get additional? No. Can I use a twist? Yes. On myself? Absolutely.

So no changes. What's the decent? Oh my god, a 17. Okay, so I will take 11. Your life is disrupted as he pulled out and now left to you, Minka. I just wanted to maintain game state. Where's my guy? I am just going to, is he on the ground? No, he's untethered now. He would have succeeded at the end of his turn, so he's still prone. Yes, he's prone, you're right. Yeah, he's prone. He's prone.

I'm going to jump on him and just like kick him with my feet. Okay, your advantage. Oh, okay. And I'm using two ki points, one to make a flurry of blows and one to make a stunning strike. Okay, let's do it. And they're all at advantage. So we'll do the first one. That will hit. That'll hit, yeah.

Natural 20. Okay. Try to give it up. Her first natural 20 in four years. Another natural 20. Oh my god! Her second natural 20 in four years. Okay, so all four hit. One will strike, two are natural 20s. So...

- Holy shit. - I hope that I murder his dead ass. - Oh, and that's-- - I hope he still has another 400. - That goes so well with the song I'm singing. - I hope he kills you in the process. - Yeah, this will be a crit. - Yeah? - Gotta give it up, we gotta give it up. - I'm gonna eat some dink. - What kind? - Dink. - Man, that ability may have been a little too strong. - That's not a dink.

But it is pretty. What? This is a D8. No, it's not. Oh, that's a D10. Okay, so there's two cuts. That's a D8. Do you need another one? That's too regular. Get rid of Derek's dice. His dice are shit. I like his little tiny babies. All right, we'll keep Derek's dice. Give me back my dice. She likes my little tiny babies. Okay. Weird. Weird.

Please don't ever do that. Oh my god, I rolled like a hundred ones.

I also want-- so while you roll this-- You are fucked up. Brought to you by Hideo Kojima. You are fucked in the head. So I wanted everyone to see what I had to see as I looked up Crusader's Mantle, this whore-- 47 damages. How would you like to do that? Well, hold on. He also has to do damage for each one of those hits, right? Oh, yeah, hold on. Because she's at very low hit points, and I want to see if she dies.

- 'Cause I'm a horrible person. - Nine, no, you gotta maintain game save. Nine plus 11. - I'm dead. - So 13 points of fire damage. - So you live, you survived all this? - She survives. - So how would you like to do this? - I want to just, 'cause he's been fucking our friends up, I wanna just jump on him and start kind of like I'm mashing grapes for a fine wine.

and laughing, but being like, "Ah, ow, ow, ow!" And just, he dies first. And then I laugh. - So, what I had to look at when I looked at Crusader's Mantle into the Discord, if you want to look at that, I've taken psychic damage. - I have to look at it now.

- Oh, I forgot the, yeah, I forgot the D4. So he takes a little bit of that too. - Okay, so yeah, it's radiant. So you leap in as all the flame skulls are clattering. You leap into the air and you do a bicycle kick and you are smashing down. And as the flame is scorching you, you do one,

and his ribcage flies off. Another, and two of the arms smash off, and then you see another, and you see that more bones, or the spine is cracking, and then you see the main skull of Exothantor that's chattering and trying to whisper some sort of ancient spell, and you smash into it with your foot, and it shatters, and...

all of the green fire immediately bursts out and then goes silent and dim as all of the bones, including the flame skulls, all clatter to the ground in pieces. Well done, Lucy. That hurt more than I thought it would. We're not okay. The left side of my face is bruised. My feet. And I'm like, I spit blood out. And I'm, as I'm like writing myself up against the, leaning up against this bookshelf,

That was awful. Did you know he was gonna be in here? Look, bitch! No. His skulls are gone, right? I will use my Omnicast to cure wounds on all of us. Except for what's-his-face. You all feel the healing power of Anubis as Quiet returns to this ruined library.

And because my guy is still up, he's also going to heal someone, whoever looks the worst. How long does he last? An hour. Oh, wow. Asher's going to look down at the pile of bones. And he says, I thought that Exothent would be here, but not like that. Not like this. He was a lich and his mind was not his entirely. Madden from...

- 200 years since he was last healed. This abomination. I've never seen him like that. - Jan, you won't again, I suspect. - Everyone heals for 21. - Oh, thank you. - I'm sorry if he was your friend. - He wasn't, but he was the master of this place. - Who looks the worst?

I have 30 hit points. Got 29. Yeah, we all look identical to the same amount of dead. We're beat up. Yeah, we were all pretty fucked up. I look like... I'm all healing your cows. I'm on the floor and I'm taking my shoes off and I'm rubbing my feet vigorously. Wow!

What do you think happened to the guy? Is he always like this? He's got a monstrosity of skulls and spell scrolls and books. No, no, he was just... He was man, but withered away to just bones and sinew. Did he do this to himself? How did he get into this state? You still have that for another minute. I don't know for sure. But it's had to have been the work of my little bat.

As half there's no other explanation, but I knew she could craft flesh and bone. But to overpower Exothanta, its flame skulls, and do this to him. You're saying your daughter did this? Or may have done this? It has her hallmark all over it. Why would she have done that, though? I don't know. It has to have been child's play.

Maybe he tried to oppose her and got in her way. Well, if Drizlash, the nine-eyed spider, is free from his sarcophagus, who knows what sort of dark bargain she's made since the first time. Do you think Drizlash is another threat we're going to have to face? Just like the king? Like any of the other terrible evils in this horrible place? I pray not. I pray that it is just simply power that...

Ravinovia is utilizing, but I don't know anymore. And he pokes around in the pile of bone fragments and the bits of trinkets here and there. And you see now that there's a large box. The one that you had seen is sitting amidst the bone fragments. And it's adorned with skeletal hands and skulls. And despite all of the destruction, all of that, it seems to have been

Maintained. Amidst it, you actually see that there's a number of scrolls that also survived in this wreckage. Now that there's no master of this place, is that a bad thing? Is something going to happen, or are all the rest of them going to break out, or like, was he maintaining them? You know, I have no idea. Perhaps we will learn once we leave this place, but I feel fine.

I'll walk over and I'll... The box seemed like the center of it. Yes. It seemed where a heart might be, perhaps. I'll pick it up. This is kind of... This was sort of like the nexus of that whole creature. Yeah, and it's sharp, too. I stepped on it. It really smarts. Um...

It's shaped like a giant Lego. Does it feel leveling at all or like totally just inert? Like I'm making a comic check. The best person to do this. Boom! That is a, I think it's a 17. Not bad at all.

Yeah, absolutely. As you pick it up, you feel this, the same kind of necrotic energies and magics that you felt radiating on you when your life force was sucked out. All of that just sickening darkness you feel as you grab this thing. It hums with power.

I put her right back down. Are you alright? Yeah, it just feels really kind of creepy. Sort of weird, you know? Be careful with it. It gives me the Ghiblis, you know what I mean? I mean, no. No. Ghibli, Ghibli, Ghibli, you know what I mean? What are Ghiblis? Just sort of like, you know, when you feel that kind of way, where you're sort of like, Ghibli, Ghibli, Ghibli. That's very tautological. Can you just explain it with the word that isn't Ghibli?

Well, I don't know. How do you explain it besides saying jibbly jibbly jibbly? I'm going to pick up the box and see if I get jibbly. I'm having a strange deja vu. LAUGHTER

You feel the same. I would say that you feel the exact same thing. Ooh! Is that the Ghiblis? That's the Ghiblis! Is this the Ghiblis, I feel? All right, nobody else touch it. It could be a dangerous artifact. It'll give you the Ghiblis. I'm not going to touch it. I don't want to mess with it. It's clearly something... It must have been Exothanters. I don't know. I would...

without picking up the box, just kind of walk amongst the wreckage of his bones and see what there is. I mean, you know, we saw the scrolls amongst his... I would be looking to see what... Make an investigation check. Just to see if it was like his journal or... And if you want to take like a full 10 minutes or like a longer time to investigate, you can roll at advantage.

We'll be here all night. I'm sitting down and resting at this point. Yeah, I think we need to chill. It's cold, but I'll sing a song. 24. You find as you make your way through the library, you see that mostly everything has been destroyed, and actually Escher joins you.

And he seems to poke his way through and he says, "Despite Hexathant being dead, what I came here for might still be here. Felix, let's look, turn over every single bookcase, look through the entire library." Of course. Absolutely. And you take your time, and the rest of you can do whatever you do while you do this. You find that there are five spell scrolls that have remained.

Prismatic Spray, Reverse Gravity, Teleport, Arcane Gate, and Polymorph that have survived. And as you do that, what are you all doing? I would like sit up against the wall and just sort of like sit down and just catch my breath because I'm pretty beat up. I mean...

Maybe Iris, since it's really dark and spooky, maybe you should look at it since you're sort of like light and holy. You know, maybe like kind of counter it out like, you know, opposites. I don't think it works that way to her.

Felix seems like he would be the best person to look at it. He knows much more about the arcane than I do. Do we... what do we... we know he's a Lich. Yep. Would any of us understand the concept of phylacteries? I mean, I know Toa certainly would. No. But like... You wouldn't. Um... I mean, I think that any spellcaster, I think, would be able to make an arcana check and see what they know about

Lich, I would say probably a wizard would know, would probably roll at advantage. I will take a stab at looking at the bones, getting a sense of this. How big the bones are. Yeah, very bony-er, I would imagine. What kind of creatures they come from. Like if there was something about a box and some secrets. Arcana? Mm-hmm.

What were the other two spells I had? Prismatic spray, arcane gate, polymorph, what were the other two? Reverse gravity. 21, as I look and think on these questions. So phylactery versus liches. 21, I think that you would know from your, probably the dark underbellies of Galtacom, you know that there's dark warlocks and magics there. You know that you would not have access to this kind of power or magic there.

But you know that a necromancer could potentially create and turn himself into a lich. And that a phylactery would be a magical artifact or powerful object that can keep them alive and they need to be destroyed. And I would say that you probably wouldn't know how to destroy it.

I've heard rumors of these kind of creatures in Galtica. I mean, they're very rare. Certainly they're in the deepest underbelly, the underground underneath the city. And it always sounded just like urban legends to me. But yeah, it's very possible that this creature will return because it might have some sort of object it's tethered to, something that its soul will allow it to remove.

re-resurrect and whatnot. Maybe then it can continue about its business. Perhaps it's been defeated before even, and it just keeps re-emerging and re-emerging, and the Amber Temple is better for it for having something as horrific as this to be the warden of this prison. I mean, we got a lot of problems, but right now, I'll let you in on one.

That actually raises a good point. If he were to come back, I'd wonder if the phylactery itself was corrupted. If he would come back in his original state, as Escher knew him, or now. And how soon? Because I do not want to do that again. It could be a day, a week, a year, I have no idea. Oh, Jesus. It's cold here, too. I...

I'm happy to bandage myself up and get the fuck out of here if you guys are. Have we found what we need to find, Escher? Um... I need...

Let's do a group perception check. And Felix, I need you to roll an arcana check at advantage. Because you're a wizard. Arcana and... Oh, I am so perceptive. Not good on the arcana. You said perception? Yeah. Perception, he said. 30. 30.

It's not bad. Okay, well, I'm not even going to worry about my perception. I got 20 on your mind. It's still group 16. You're a wizard, Felix. So I would say... You're a wizard, Felix. I would say, Iris, you're the only one who notices this. You hear your cat ears perk up.

And as you're all looking at this box, and you've been noticing it occasionally happening, you hear a kind of a... What you thought was perhaps just the room settling, the library. But you hear a... Like cracking. Very faint and distant. After this battle... Would I... Would it make sense, having seen the amber sarcophagi with...

Mishka the wolfsprider? No, the Ron Lens. Ron campaign. I'm sorry, Driss Lash. Driss Lash, thank you. Ron arc of the campaign. I have to write a lot of bullshit in this campaign. There's a lot. And I didn't start taking notes until today. Three years later. Would I... Would it register to me that it could possibly be a cracking of another...

I would say that you probably get the sense that there's multiple cracks. With a three, you would say it's multiple cracks and you know that whatever is happening out there

It does not seem to be affecting this chamber, but there does seem to be something happening out there. While you do that, Felix, you would know what a Lich is. I would say that whatever you know about a Lich is Andy would know. But you would know that only the power of the gods and the divine radiant damage would be needed to destroy... Lucky for us, my crown of stars lasts an entire hour. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, if only we had a cleric that dealt a shit ton of radiant damage. But we have your crown of stars. Who needs my god? And I can do fire damage. You know that it's the divine power of the gods that would need to be destroyed. I would like to do fire damage. Because lucky for you guys, as a cleric, I have fire damage.

Yeah, I share this with everybody. And, you know, and I tell them it's, we need power of the gods. Oh, something holy is what you're saying. Yeah, I mean, that's what I understand. My giant Anubis is going to make three radiant damage attacks immediately on the thing if we want him to destroy it. Are you going to...

Do that as Iris. No. Do we? Do I have... No. You don't have to repeat it. We don't have to repeat it. Do I have any feeling, though, that, like, he could come back as his normal Exothant, or that, like, there's no shot and we should run off destroying him? I'll say, just for the sake of what you know and what you've heard, that you get the sense that it being at the heart...

And it being something that Ravinovia had in her control when this was crafted, whatever kind of sick joke that this was, you get the sense that it would probably come back as the same creature. Okay. All right, yeah, everybody step back and let Iris deal with this. Well, I was honestly thinking you have your radiant crown of stars atop your head.

Oh. Well, but if someone said the power of the gods, I think even though that's technically radiant damage from a 5-human chemical sense, I don't think that would necessarily apply as a power of the gods. What the fuck are you talking about, Toadman? Because it's more arcane.

"Jesse, what the fuck are you talking about?" "Are you okay?" "I mean, ugh. I mean, do whatever." Is there still a tiny Anubis, like a cute Anubis dog around? He's not tiny. He's like, if you look at the photos that ZZ posted in Discord, he's the one with the scythe, because wow. Okay. And Iris is eyeing him up like a tasty snack. Yeah, he is also like 12 feet tall.

- Oh yeah. - There's a very large Anubian, and actually once the battle dies down, he just stands where he is and he just puts his large staff or spear with a polearm of some kind onto the ground and just stares forward like a statue. - All right, all right, everyone back up. - Thank you, Lone Guard, for the caprice tie fighter.

That's not what I was expecting to see when I got in here. I was going to do some cute dots. And yes, he's going to make all three of his attacks. Do I need to roll for damage? I would say no, just for the sake of it. It would be a lot of fucking damage. If all three hit. You...

You see this Anubian warrior with your mind you're able to control and shimmering with divine light smashes it down. It smashes down its weapon onto the phylactery and you see the box strikes and a flash of gold light emerges and it shatters and breaks and you see as you hear this horrific wailing sound that bursts into this green

uh ghastly light and uh the pieces fragment everywhere and as uh as it as the the the light uh settles down you hear the

And suddenly, silence. Well, and now with that done, I believe that some of the Amber Psychophagi are cracking elsewhere in this temple. As if on cue, you all see a flash of amber light from the doorway that you entered flashes up and then shrinks back down into complete darkness and

Uh, should we do something about that? Maybe we should leave, because I imagine similarly evil and powerful entities like Drizlash are in each one of those sarcophagi, and there's like three or four dozens of them. And how are we going to leave? Out the door? Into the area where all of these entities now reside? Well, maybe we should just go take a look real quick and see if they actually are breaking, or maybe they're just cracking a little bit.

Let's move fast. But we don't have much time. Okay, so I'll start to walk down the stairway and go out, you know. I found it! I found it! Yes! Yes! And you see Escher, who, Felix, you had kind of gotten a sense that you'd cased over everything. Right. And Escher, his hair disheveled, his eyes almost like wide and maddened, as he steps forward and he holds in his hand the same color that you had seen

flash up. It's the color of amber, but it's small, and you see the size of his palm looks like a key made of amber. As he holds it up, and he clenches his fist around it, and he looks at all of you, and he says, yes, this is what I came here for. Thank you, my friends. Thank you, my friends. What is that?

What does it go to? This is the only chance. This is the only hope to be able to free my Ravenovia without killing her. If I can rip Drizlash from her, we can perhaps separate her and maybe there's good left in her heart.

All right, that's fantastic news. But we need a way out, and we need a way out quickly. I mean, looking through these spell scrolls, I could use one of them, but I was really hoping to copy some of these down. Just bring them with you. Put them in your pack. Or we can't bring them with us if we use them, Caprice. Right. I just said that. They're one-time use, unless I was to be able to write it down.

Well, I didn't know that. That's okay. I'm not accosting you. No, but I was. I'm sorry, Caprice. That's not how my magic works. So, why don't we just start running towards the front door and leave? Oh, yeah. Why don't we? I've got what I came here for. Because I literally just said the Amber Sarcophagi are cracking. Oh, sorry. I was busy. I was busy. Well, I...

I don't know what that's necessarily... Does that mean that it's dangerous to go past this doorframe? We could just take the spell scrolls, take the thing that'll help your daughter, take this box, you know, throw it in one of our packs, and then just run out. And if we see any nightmare, you know, diet drizzlashes or what have you, we just run past it.

Leave it alone. Leave them in the top of this cold mountain. They can do whatever the fuck they want, and then we're on our way. Just, you know, grab some snowboards. Call it a day. Are we sure that all of the things in the ember are back? Well, there's a reason that the aspects got imprisoned in ember. Well, do they have like a physical form? Will there be a bunch of monsters out there? Or is it more sort of, you know, kind of ethereal and metaphorical? From what I understand, after...

trying to figure out what happened to Ravenovia. They need mortals.

to channel their will. - So we could potentially walk out there, they could sloop into us and take control of our bodies and our power. - I don't consent to that. - Neither do I. - I don't think they'll ask. - Yeah, you had mentioned before that there was some sort of deal that needed to be made. I mean, do you think that's not the case anymore if they're out of the Amber? - I think that you have to accept a gift.

You have to accept one of their dark gifts willingly. Well, then we should be perfectly fine. We'll just say no thank you and keep moving. But the power of the minds, even from the sarcophagi, my friends mentioned it. They were even able, even while trapped...

To meddle with the minds of mortals. Oh, we'll be fine. We have very strong minds. Even Toa here. Yes, you're right. And he looks down at this shattered phylactery. Look at him. He's sturdy. He's hearty. Yeah, but that's just like the outside. The inside is like... Don't say that about Toa. Like coconut. Kind of empty, but sweet. This is very simple. Whatever you do, until we leave this place, say no to everything. Except to us.

Except to us. I can do that. I will say no to everyone except the four of you. And my Anubian guardian. Oh, Asha too.

Yes. You get to decide if you say yes or no to any of us, but it's no to everyone else or anything else. Yes, you don't have to say yes to us or to Esha. Would you like me to magically lock you into this framework that we described? Oh, you know what? I think that would probably be for the best. All right, well, I suggest you do what we just described in terms of nos, yeses, and various party members. I choose to fail the saving throw. Oh.

That's great! I'll definitely do that now. When you have to use a spell slot to account for Toa. Worth it. Fucking worth it. You do this, and you've all decided to take a short rest in the

If we think we have time, I mean, I was resting while they were looking. Yeah, so I think you all would have been resting, so you would take the full hour. Our king, recovery! Goodbye, Nubian guardian, you were so sexy while it lasted. His muscles are kind of tense and flexed. I'm that cat that's like sidling up next to him, like arching my back and just rubbing guy. It feels real good. Oh, he's great. That feels real good. I'm going to summon him every day. And it shimmers.

And saints. I'm going to sing for the Song of Rest because we only got through the first half of Winnie's song.

I might have something I can use to help with her healing. If you use any hit dice, you get to add a 1d10 to your healing. Don't mind if I do. What a lovely level 2 bard feature. Oh, yes. Healing dice. That's a great fucking call. That's what I'm going to do, and that's why I'm adding 1d10 to anyone using hit dice in addition to this song.

Some people like to sneak attack. Some folks can't hold out that long.

♪ Nobody wants to cure wounds now ♪ ♪ There's too much going on ♪ ♪ This spell is gonna last forever ♪ ♪ Last all, last all battle long ♪ ♪ Sometime before the sun comes up ♪ ♪ You'll have to roll another saving throw ♪ ♪ There's gonna be a crit hit tonight ♪ ♪ A crit hit tonight I know ♪ ♪ There's gonna be a crit hit tonight ♪ ♪ A crit hit tonight I know ♪

- ♪ What I know ♪ And so on. - Well done. - Love it. - I'm gonna use a little bit more. - It's not, it's just one D10, not for each one you roll, right? For just, you get it one time? - Correct. - I'm rolling such odd fire on these hit dice. - Oh shit. - I did really well too. - Like very nearly max. - I did pretty well. I got sixes and then pretty good. Not bad. - Yeah, I'm full health.

May use it kind of a bit. Oops. It's not. Yeah, I might need to use more.

Do you have to decide how many you use before you roll them or later? You can do them as you want. It's not like a gamble while you're resting that they force you to do that. I appreciate it. We're good. We're good. I just have to apply those other two. You all steal your... you feel rested.

And Escher draws his rapier once more after cleaning all the filth off of it from this creature. And he steps forward and he says, make sure you stay close. We have no idea what we'll face out there. Perhaps it'll be unchanged. We'll be able to walk out of here effortlessly. Thank you, friends, for joining me. This finally gives me hope.

We're right behind you. You're welcome. Let's get out of here, okay? And you all leave the library, and you step out and run as quickly as you can into the Amber Temple.

And you lose sense of time and space. Oh no! It's like the worst thing you can lose. Just on the border of your waking mind, there lies another place where darkness and light are one. You are alone. In the darkness. Can there be music? Because this is eerie without it. You stare up. And you are not alone, in fact. You are standing before...

a huge amber sarcophagus, a large crack running down its center. As you stare into the dim amber light and the swirling shape within, you feel its presence and you hear its voice. I'm gonna need everyone to not reveal what's on the back of these little packets that I have. And you're going to need to read them and you do not tell anybody else.

Oh, my God. Secret package. Secret package. Wait, wait, wait. But they're also sealed. So just look at that. Do not open them. Do not open them. Do not open them. Do not open them.

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in time and space for just a moment. And suddenly, you are in darkness. The only light is the very dim, dim amber light that is contained within a cracked, eight-foot-tall amber sarcophagus that stands before each of you. Was this sarcophagus here before we left? What was that? Like, we came in this way, didn't we? Or are we going a different way? Yes.

You have seen many sarcophagi, but you are alone, swallowed in darkness, standing before one, each of you. The only presence is the presence that you feel held within the sarcophagus. Darkness entirely swallowing everything out, everything else around you. And you see the wisp darkness within moving about,

larger than you had seen when you first entered and seen the sarcophagi. Toa, you stand before looking up at this huge amber sarcophagus, and the dark shade moving within growing larger and larger, looking somewhat bestial. And you hear a voice in your head. You want to be strong? I am Great Tar-Hawk, the five-headed destroyer.

Weak as you are, you'll never scare an insect. I offer you the strength of fire! You will then show your friends how strong you truly are. No. No. You want power. You cannot protect your friends. How puny you are! You cannot protect your family! And suddenly your consciousness shifts.

You see visions. You see visions of a... You see visions of a volcano erupting. You see the Makani Islands completely ignited in flame. You see the massive lava flows that spill down the sides of the mountain. You see the massive boulders, flaming rocks, crashing into villages, smashing and burning Goliaths alive. But then you see...

where the great volcano spirit is erupting and taking form to massacre your people. It is met with another being of flame. Not just pure magma and lava, not elemental, but fiendish. Hellish fire, stronger than anything of the natural world, crashes into it, overwhelms it.

smashes it back into the caldera of the volcano. And you realize now that that being of fire is you. Do you wish to claim the power of fire, tiny Goliath? I still presumably still feel the magic of suggestion on me. I would say you don't. Oh.

Oh, oh, oh, um, I can say more than just the word no. I mean, that sounds really nice, but how can I trust you? What you're showing me is if it's going to happen, I mean, I sort of dealt with all of that already. Unless I didn't. Did you deal with it? Do you believe that this is over? Do you believe that the power of wind can ever...

Clap down the power of fire! Wind is weak, water is weak, fire is strong! Accept my gift! Show them the power of fire! I was told by my friends not to trust you or anyone, so I think you're playing a trick on me. There is no trick.

You do not need tricks and deception when you can use brute force and strength to solve all of your problems. The strength of Tarhok. Can I ask you a private question about this on my card? Yeah. Don't listen, Andy. Does this refer to him? Yes. Okay. Ooh.

And this is... how should I... roleplay that? I mean... it's something I would say. This needs to... Okay, this is it. Got it. Well, I mean... It sounds like you're making sense and I definitely would like power because I want to protect my people and my own. So what would happen? What kind of deal would you do? Accept my gift!

Oh, I mean, that sounds very nice. I mean, living up to my potential is what any hero would do, right?

Yes. Yes? Yes? Well, they're gonna be really mad if I'd say yes. They will not. They won't? When they see how strong you are, all of your problems will be solved by the strength of fire. All of my problems? All of them. Every single one? Every single one. There is nothing that strength cannot solve.

That sounds really, really nice. Your friends use words. They make you feel bad about the strength you have. For feeling stupid. But all of their power is useless. Right. Right. You know, I try really hard and they still don't believe I'm capable. They don't. But you know who believes you are capable.

Who? Who? Iris. The Great. Tarr. Hark. The Five-Headed Destroyer. And especially Felix. He whispers about you. To all of them, he says you are stupid, that you are a liability. Toa.

He is not your friend. He is not to be trusted. He does? Yes. He says that? Yes. But he's my best friend. He is not your best friend. He is no friend to you, Toa. You only have one friend. The Grace Tar-Hak!

All right, you're my new best friend. Do you accept my gift? Yes, I accept your gift. Open your thing and do not share it with anyone.

I'm so mad right now. Chat knows. I'm almost mad enough to accept the dark gift and use it on a certain life! You don't know any of that! I know! Andy knows! Andy will never forget. Oh, he's pouting. We'll do it later once we... Yeah. Lifting. You stand before the sarcophagus and you hear a voice. My name is Vekra.

Queen of boxes. I bid you to accept my gift. It is disease at your command. Your name will reek of power. You're a queen? Yes, I am a queen. So you must be pretty powerful, huh? I am. I reek with power. And soon you will too. You...

You chose me? To give your power to? Like... Yes. You like me? I do not like you yet. You still have this stench of cleanliness, of health. But... But what do I do? Accept my gift. Accept my filth. Oh!

Your power will spread like disease, like a plague. Yeah, but what? What do I do with it? How does that work? You accept my gift and we will be together and we'll spread the boxes. We'll spread disease, plague, stench, filth. Yeah, but people won't like that, will they?

It seems like not fun and I... You know, fun's kind of my thing, but I do want to be... I don't know. You're a queen, so I do want to be friends with you. There's nothing more boring than cleanliness. There's nothing more boring than health. The time it takes. Yeah. That's true. Okay, I'm...

If I don't like it, can I give it back? Yes. That seems fair. Yes. Make an insight check at advantage. I like that both of you so far have just asked questions that have played into the hands of these beings that are like, why not? Yeah, okay. Uh...

You know, I think it makes sense. I mean, you are a queen and we have a lot of important stuff we're trying to get done. So you could probably help us. And you will be a queen too. And I could be a queen too. And then I could help us because I'd be a queen. And all will bow down to you. Everybody loves a queen. They love you. They will accept your gift like you will accept mine.

And they will love you and adore you for it. Yeah, everybody will love me. I'll be everyone's best friend. I want a gift, yeah. I'll be best friends. Open your card, please.

And it's all still secret. Yep. Who is Toa's person again? Tarhawk. Tarhawk. The five-headed destroyer. Toa's new best friend. I hate you. Friendship with Felix ended. Tarhawk is new best friend. Amazing. Felix. I'm ready. You stare up. Where am I? At the sarcophagus. And you hear a voice.

In your head. I am known as Irga, the Isle of Shadows. You would do well by accepting the gift I offer.

No secrets will ever escape you. All knowledge will be within your grasp. Life is pointless, so there's no time to waste searching for its secrets. Where have you taken me? Why am I here?

Thank you for the twist, Agent Mike. Thank you, Agent Gale, I've had the twist! Thank you for the follow, skeptic nuisance. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you! Mike is clearly in the zone. Apologies for all that. Derek and I are in sync today. Thank you. He's Justin and I'm Lance. That's fine. Where am I? Why am I here?

Why are any of us here? You will find the answer to that unanswerable question by accepting my gift. You will gain the eyes of shadow. You will learn about the meaninglessness of life. I mean, it's not possible for someone to learn everything. There's not enough time. There's no way. You are right. It is not possible.

For your friends. For the average common mortal. But if you accept my gift, the eyes of shadow, you can learn everything. Everything there is to know in these worlds and beyond.

Look, I'm sorry. I can't do this. There's no way. I need to get out of here, and I need to find my friends, and I need to leave. We have to leave the temple. I have to find them. You suddenly feel your consciousness leave you as it transfers, and suddenly all you're in a void, but surrounded by stars. You see the blankness disappear,

of darkness beyond them, but you rocket towards them on all sides. And within each star as you pass by is a wealth of knowledge of countless eons, countless civilizations, countless worlds. And your mind swells. Any answer to any question. And you finally see a single star looming

Ahead of you is an orb of light that radiates with eldritch color, and as you hear the horrible sound of infinity, you see Milo within, and he reaches out his hand, and you reach forward, and you know how to grab it, and you do, and suddenly you're ripped back. "Aah! No, Mace, stop! It's too much! Milo! Where is he? You know where my brother is!"

Of course. And you will too if you accept my gift. I don't know if I can handle it. Why doubt yourself, Felix? You can. I would not have chosen you as my vessel. As your vessel? Like you're stuck here? For now. If I accept your gift...

Will you take me to the stars and show me all those things? Yes. Of course I will. Why wouldn't I? I can help you get out of here, right? Yes. A mutually beneficial arrangement. And if I know everything, I can solve all of the problems. I can save Caprice. Yes. I can save my brother.

Yes? I can... I mean... All of your problems, your friends cannot help you. Their intellect and intelligence, their wisdom is so tiny compared to your brain. They are so... Compared to your mind. But more importantly, I can help them and everyone. Yes. You can help the helpless and the useless by gaining more knowledge. That's right.

I have to do it. It would be wrong of me to say no. It would. Do you accept my gift, Felix? Yes. Yes, I do. Open your packet, please. Caprice, you stare at the amber sarcophagus before you, and you see a shape slithering back and forth within. It seems to almost be shapely and seductive.

And you have seen such a silhouette and shape so many times in your life, but wait a minute, it's definitely not her. This is far more attractive, far more irresistible. You hear a voice. Ah, pretty traveler from far lands, when I roamed the world like you, all desires were within my reach. My very word was enough to collect anything or anyone I wished.

Do you wish to be as persuasive and desirable as I used to be? I remember moments ago jumping out of that chamber where we killed with Lich and knowing that there were emerging horrors coming out of these ember sarcophagi. Do I remember that? You knew that there was cracking, yes. Well, you're not Classia. What's your name? My name is...

Shami Amurai, the Lady of Delights. It's a pleasure to meet you, Shami. How are you? How's Ben? Have you been enjoying your time here? It is not relevant if I am enjoying my time. Well, it seems to me that you're probably some sort of a horrible nightmare, and I don't want to accept your gift for just offering it out of nowhere. Why me? Why this gift?

Because who is more desirable than you, Caprice? Compared to your friends. No one loves them. But everyone loves you.

Well, that is certainly true. Thank you for the compliment. I really appreciate it. Shami? Yeah? I'm all right. It's been a pleasure. Do you want to hear a song? It depends on how much time you want to enjoy this scenario, because I got millions of them. Do you wish to accept my gift, Caprice? Do you wish to accept it? Uh, yeah.

Can't imagine possibly ever, ever, ever saying yes to that. Thank you, sexy shadow lady. Shami, it's been a pleasure. I will now... Am I in, like, a void? I will just back up in this void.

Has Caprice finally learned a lesson? He backs up for eternity. There's gonna be a little moose. Look at that. How do you do that? Then you step away. And do I suddenly come back to myself? Does the vision disappear? You're cutting away from Caprice. From you. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

Iris, you see a shape before you. It looms tall, and it says... Hello, traveler. You stand before Sir Cain, the sole hungerer. I offer you complete control over death. A great power it is, but it has a price.

And whenever you use it, you'll also collect the price to be paid. Well, that sounds lovely. But I'm a worshipper of Anubis, and I would never dare to step on his toes. It would be blasphemous of me to even consider such a gift. Suddenly, a vision comes to your mind. You see Anubis standing, struggling, a howling sandstorm around him.

and you see his flesh begin to wither away. The jackal-headed man, now no more than a skeleton in the desert, as it crumbles away, dead god, the bones fall inside of his armor. The crook and flail fall into the dunes. As the sand rakes your body, you raise a paw and effortlessly

The skeleton rises, flesh grows, sinew, blood vessels, muscle, skin, fur. A god, once dead, reborn, stands before you all with a flick of a wrist. Suddenly, the thing in the amber is in front of you once again. Do you not see the power that my gift offers? A tear falls down Iris's face. Um...

And she chokes back a sob. I will not fall to your tricks. The first lesson I was taught is that death comes for us all, and I am not the master of fate. Anubis would not have chosen me if he didn't think I was up to the task that he set under his terms. I will not step from the path and give in to yours. I denounce you. Now leave me be. Anubis.

You say that. And you just hear a, and suddenly you're once again swallowed in darkness. You just step away. You just walk, you turn around and you walk. And now I'm like fully crying just thinking about you again. You're crying and you turn into the darkness and you walk as Caprice. You creep back. And suddenly all five of you are back in the library. Time and space has turned black.

As Iris, you see Caprice, and you lock eyes as the three of you see three horrible, abominable monsters. The two of you. Oh, okay. See three horrible, abominable creatures also in the library with you. Caprice, what's the ever-living fuck? And I am going to... Do I have anything? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

I am going to... As I would like the three of you to describe what you look like, and what do you do as your... Suddenly your consciousness turns, and you look down, and you've changed, but you feel like... You feel like you've become who you were always meant to be. Okay.

I'll go first. So I am now a large creature, so I'm probably, you know, I would go from 7 feet tall to probably 12 to 15 feet tall. Do I look just like this? Do I have like

I would say it's a you version of that. It's still like bits and pieces of you. So I'm still sort of wearing the same clothes and stuff. Yes, yes, yes. But you are turning into a similar creature. I am covered. I have horrible demonic horns. My skin is entirely red. I have almost like sort of like a half like goat bowl, roughly beastial sort of face and snout with sharp teeth.

I have at my knees, I have your classic kind of devil goat leg that kind of goes back and has hooves. I have spikes coming out of my shoulders with skulls impaled on them because skulls for the skull throne. And I have blazing bright red eyes and a slavering black tongue.

And that's what I look like. I'll pass it over. What would I sound like? I'm just curious. I have to come up with a voice. You're still Felix, right? I'm still Felix. I am a humanoid-looking creature. But my arms and my face have become...

Very withered, very thin. I also have an extra arm. I've got a third arm now. Also withered and bony and kind of gross. My skin is a light pale blue. My head, though, from kind of like where my eyes would be, it has like stretched and elongated up and out.

almost like into two obelisks, where they're like thicker at the bottom and tapered up at the top, and kind of amongst them are fleshy eyeballs. And I have eight eyes, four on each side, and they kind of get smaller as they go up the obelisk. And I look like this mutant lich flesh abomination.

And I'm still me, so like I guess I don't know. What color is your... My skin is like kind of like a light blue, pale, and I'm very thin and gone, and my face, and it looks like the skin is stretched over the bones underneath. But my head is this weird like elongated, like almost like a tuning fork, like coming out of the side of my head. Okay. Exactly, yeah. And I'm like this, and I got an extra arm, and I'm like...

I'm picturing the same thing. I'm picturing the same thing, Nost. I don't know what I'm picturing. Kels. So when you last saw me, I was roughly five feet tall, adorable little blue thing. And now in front of you is a large...

almost a slug-like creature, if you could picture Slurm Mackenzie. I can! So in front of you is a mass of just kind of slimy, gelatinous, green, goopy, formless flesh.

And there are appendages coming off that might be arms. They might be tails. You're not really sure. A slash across the top kind of opens into this like gloopy drooling, like slimy mall. There's other orifices that again might be mouths. There's teeth and claws and just everything.

bursting boils and bubbles and skin lesions and tentacles coming out of the top of my head that again have little like mouth like orifices at the end um and i'm basically just creating a puddle of

greasy, goopy, slimy goo, and I'm emanating just a horrific smell. I assume that because you accepted the Queen's filth, you also have a bankers box full of sticky VHS porno tapes? Exactly. Oh, so you're actually the Kelsey! Yeah, exactly right. Who wants to watch Chitty Chitty Gangbang? Okay.

I actually wish I was dead. So you see me and what tentacles might come up. You hear like my skin like...

sliding as I move. You might hear little things pop and burst on me. I don't want these meatballs anymore. You picked the wrong time for meatballs. Blame Mike. You'll see my appendages come up as I'm just like...

And that's what you see in front of you. Oh, fuck, Iris! What the fuck? Oh, my God! What the hell? Jesus! Oh, my... What the fuck? For the first time in my life, Caprice, I am speechless, and I'm going to cast Anti-Life Shell on myself. Okay. I can't do it to you, Caprice, but I don't want those things touching me. Well, thanks. Yeah.

I would say that both of you would recognize the traits of Lufty, of Felix, and of Toa. That would make you not immediately be like, oh, it's just a random monster, I'm going to kill him. I would say it's very apparent. Caprice, I don't see anywhere where Toa, Felix, or Lufty could possibly be. We must kill these things. I think they're the, look at them, look at them.

- This one looks kind of toey. - You'll see bits of my sweater and my leader hose and kind of like a- - It's consumed, Luffy. - And like the spoon kind of sticking out at an odd angle. - Do we still recognize them? We know we are still ourselves. We have all of our memories. - You have all your memories, you know, but what's on your cards is basically the big change. And so you've accepted the gift. And I will say within each of your persons, you feel the presence of that dark vestige that you had spoken to.

Caprice, you are right. We are still your friends. And as I look at you, dark, yes, my eyes will focus on you, around this elongated, bizarre thing, seven motes

of light, similar to what you saw previously, only now it is deep, deep, dark purple, and it almost looks like a void. And even though it's darkness, you still feel like it's hard to look at. And it's bright, but it's not. It's this dark space light crowning my head. Like black holes. Almost. Felix, look at yourself! Did you accept the fucking gift, you stupid idiot? We had all agreed we were not going to accept the gifts. It's...

Caprice of all of us can say no. So I use magic on you. No. It didn't work, Caprice. Lofty. Oh. No, no, no. I think that's, I don't think that's Lofty. I think that's, I think that one is Toa.

Oh my god, she's speaking to me! Don't pop on my linens! Don't you recognize me? You've never been as ugly before. You can't conquer me. I've always been quite pretty. Come here. The power we've gained is what we need. I'll start sliming towards Iris. Is Lufty undead? She is not. And I posted pictures of just the general thing. I'm gonna escort. I'm gonna escort.

My description can't do the picture justice. I think I did pretty good. Oh, that's not one. It's in general? Oh, it is. Yeah. That's what I was. Oh, no, no, it's in a pretty different. Oh, Andy's pretty good, right? Okay, beneath dark wings. I was going to say, anyone who's not watching this right now is going to be real confused. Oh, that's fucking badass. Oh, you didn't describe the teeth in your fucking stomach. It's an orifice. It was rotten teeth.

I'm gonna look at you guys. I wanna see y'all. Those are like a bunch of penises with a lot of foreskin on your head. I think that, at least my assumption is, if Caprice had accepted, he would probably have actual penises and shit everywhere. Yeah, it'd be a floating cloud of boobs. He'd have like six tits. He'd have penises everywhere. Will you...

Thank you for the follow, likeadrake. Thank you. This is everywhere. Welcome. And thank you for the sub, GTRPG Academy. Thank you for the sub, GTRPG Academy. And thank you, Big Moms, for the sub. Thank you, Big Moms. Thank you. Thanks, everyone. Thank you. Did you have entities for me in Caprice?

We'll talk about it in the next show. Okay, perfect. I just want to make sure. That's what that's there for. Will we talk about it in the next show, what's written on the back as well? Because I have a question about that. Yeah. Or is it a pair of blades we can talk about now? What's the question now? My question is, what could you have written on anyone else's for them to possibly accept the gift? That's what blows my mind. Is that like, what you wrote here is like totally... A Vanjerson show. A Vanjerson show. Okay. A Vanjerson show. It's hypothetical now. If it's relevant to the story now, then yeah.

You say that and you accepted the gift. Yes, but anyway, we can talk about it in the show. Everyone stay where you are. Don't slime towards us, Lufty. Stay where you are, Felix. Toa, you guys got corrupted as fuck. You guys accept, where's Escher? Where's Escher?

Yes, where the fuck is Asher? You look around and you don't see Asher. Of course he would leave us in our moment of need. What could possibly have caused you to do this? We had agreed to her. We're your friends. No, you're not. What are you talking about? Of course I am. No, you think I'm stupid. You think I'm an idiot. You think I'm worthless. No. No, I know. I know.

He told me. We didn't think that before, but look at you right now. You accepted the gift, you idiot. Yeah, honestly, Capriza's a point. I knew it. And I'm going to walk up to him. As soon as you start to walk towards me, I would pull out my viol and I'd be like, don't you fucking take another step. Toa has a point. We have been gifted. Unbelievable.

that we need to save everyone. - What did they offer you? - I've seen everything. I know all, and I have solutions to it. - And it doesn't bother you that you've got like eight eyes? Look at yourself right now. Look at your hands. Look at your feet. Look at your body. - Milo will never recognize you if we find him. He won't want to be anywhere near you looking like that. - It doesn't matter.

Please do, you must kill him. There is no hope. There is only fixing the broken. Finding the lost. How could you all have done this? Look at- Yeah, just look at me, though.

Please stop the smelling. It was helpless before we made the bargains. It was helpless. We had no hope. This was the only way. It was the only way. We had hope. To save my hope. No. No. We didn't. Caprice is right. We had hope. And I can't speak for him right now, but I still do. I will not let whatever stupidity the three of you have succumbed to

Uh...

Are you two standing next to each other? Oh yeah, we would have like shoulder to shoulder. He's like 10 feet from me because I have an anti-life shell that he can't get into around me, but... You guys would have been able to back into the rest of the library while the three monstrous party members are probably, you know... Oh, can we... Yeah, let's do that. Let's actually simulate it. That's why... Please. That's why... Because I'm about to cast this shit. So where are we? Uh...

I would say that probably the three of you are just past that little bridge, the three monsters, and then Caprice and Iris are probably a little bit further into this larger library. I am, I would say a good- And I'm 10 feet away from her. Yeah, I would say I'm probably a good 15, 20 feet away from them, wherever you want to put me, but I'm not like right on, I'm not on top of them, right? I would be like around you guys, I guess, but, you know, at least a good distance away. Are you a large creature as well? Oh.

- I wasn't really given a... - No, I would just be like the android. - No big. - Like a creepy lich man thing. - Iris is right. We will proceed, but we cannot do so without you two accepting the power. - Yes. - All I got was a compliment and then it was nothing. What are you talking about?

You should have accepted. You could have had the power like we do. And I'll continue sliming toward you. You stay where you are! No, keep on sliming up. Caprice, I'm not sure what to do. Both of you are disgusting right now. I am sure that if you call deep within now,

The offers will still stand. I'm going to immediately sink to my knees and I'm going to do Divine Intervention. You will fall to your knees as you try to cast Divine Intervention. You had simply attempted and failed less than a week prior. It's only a week if it succeeds. Oh, well, I would have said you get the sense that a week has probably passed, shockingly.

As you've lost sense of time. Oh, fuck. Oh, well that's even scarier, so... It's all our campaign's rhyme. Regardless, regardless. That is so much worse. That's so fucking funny. Great. As you attempt to cast Divine Intervention.

Oh, so that's where Escher is. Neat. I should also note that as I'm moving, a trail of grease is being left behind me. I fall to my knees.

I know, miss. I know. I know that you are in trouble. I know it, but I need your help. My friends have succumbed to their vanity. They have succumbed to stupidity. They have succumbed to a lust for power. And I need you, please help us. And I'll reach out and he will not answer. He will not answer. Not immediately. As suddenly you see Iris's eyes flash in radiant gold and

And she collapses to the ground. And you are left alone, Caprice, with these monsters. Oh dear. And Iris, your mind leaves this chamber. Your friends all changed to horrible monsters. Helpless. Not sure what to do. You call on the power of your god and you suddenly feel something within you. Is it within your heart? No. It's within your soul.

burst out and you see Caprice as you back up the three monsters approaching you, Iris collapsing to your side. You see a core inside of her glow with the strange orangish-yellowish light as Iris. Your consciousness leaves you the chill, the absolute chill of the Amber Temple far behind. You didn't really realize just how cold it had gotten.

until you are now in the blasting heat of a desert. And it feels like home. Yeah. But it's not. It's looks, you see dunes all around you. You see off in the distance, strange temples, pyramids. Beyond that, a tall wall of what looks like a sandstorm. But through it, the sand, you see the dense,

dark grayness of mist as it swirls around violently, and a huge radiating sun is above you. And before you, you suddenly see, after taking in everything that you have, you see that huge black pyramid.

a beam of silver light rocketing into the sky. The swirling clouds that are around you are penetrated by this massive beam as it rockets upwards into the mist. You see the 13 symbols on the door to this massive pyramid, the tops of the steps. And you see what looks like a hieroglyphic of an owl on its door.

And then you see it. You see him. You see Anubis. You see the muscular form in those adornments of the Osirian pantheon as he holds his crook and flail in one hand and another hand is outstretched at the door. A pulsing beam of golden light that with each pulse

You see the temple shake. And you see now that there's only one sigil around this door that's lit up. Just one seal remains unbroken.

as it pulses. And you see now your god that had once stood so tall, with very full muscles, full body, imposing. His jackal head and his dark skin now is sunken in. It looks hollow. And you realize now that you're standing directly beside him. And...

You suddenly feel like you can move and you can speak as Anubis stares forward, his palm outstretched, attempting to contain whatever power is attempting to burst out of this pyramid. I would immediately rush forward and stand behind him. My god, I will help in whatever way you need. I'm here. Let me help you. Let me relieve some of the burden that you hold with on your shoulders. He stares forward.

incredibly deep in thought, and then he looks down and suddenly everything goes still as if time has stood still. You look and you see the whooping grains of sand around you suddenly hold in place. As Anubis moves and you see him lower his hand, but the beam of light is still connecting towards the door of this pyramid.

And he looks down at you, a hollow jackal's face, but with the sentience of a man or humanoid of any kind. And he says, "There is not much time, child. You will help, but I must confess that I have doomed you." - I will blink a couple of times and think of Caprice. We will make mistakes.

both men and gods. He pauses and he looks back to the door of this massive, really more of like a massive stone gate to this pyramid and then turns back to you and he says, I do not have much power left. And I hope the mistake I will make if you allow me to return, that you will one day be able to forgive me.

I will give you the small fragments of my power I have left in this godless land, but you must hurry to Harakia, beyond the mists. It is your destiny, but I must warn you what I have done. I won't say anything back. I'll just nod and stare at him.

In this godless land, its dark lord, a pharaoh, one of the first, with a neck bet, rules from death. Millennia ago, his soul was ripped into seven fragments. The seven car.

He desperately seeks to reunite them. I had a hand in his punishment. I controlled where to place one fragment. These pieces of Ka can be contained in souls. And when you were born, his Ka came to Evantris.

I will nod knowingly. I prayed you would never come to Harakir. It would be out of his grasp. But the Fates, they have a cruel sense of irony. Now all that remains, the only hope, is for you and your friends to come here, deal with Ankatep. Deal, more importantly,

"Wherefore is Doom, the chained god? He will not stay chained much longer. You must accept help from even the unlikeliest and most distrustworthy." "I will raise my hand. You will forgive me for what I must do. But I understand you. Save your strength. I know what you ask of me." And he pauses and he says,

Thank you, Iris of the Sands. No. Thank you, my god. And you see as there's a flash and where Anubis stands, he looks incredibly hollow. You see the sand part and he seems to be standing of what looks like Anubis.

but a grotesque mockery of it. And where there's the head, would normally be a head of a jackal, is a skull. A jackal skull? A jackal skull. Which is a beautiful skull, by the way, if you didn't know what they look like. As... as it then gets consumed in the sand once again, and suddenly your consciousness returns. You rise up.

And light radiates from you. I turn to Caprice. I'm so sorry. Pazuzu, pazuzu, pazuzu. And what did you just do? And I'm going to start stomping towards Iris. As soon as you start stomping together, I will sing a quick song. I hope that's what you meant. The tiniest quick song that I could possibly, before you could even get a step out, I cast Force Cage around the three of you.

And there's no save or anything. It just happens. 20 foot by 20 foot by 20 foot cube. Definitely could in my opinion, but up to the DM. Large, large, and medium creature. Bingo bango. I will sing a quick song for that purpose, I guess. Yeah, well, you do that. Let me pull up. You want to force the hand of a cleric. That's how you do it. Are we allowed to take actions? Yeah. I'll tell you what the...

Yeah. Mr. Bard, that's my name. My name again is Mr. Bard. I have a question. I have a couple questions. So do I have access to any of my normal stuff? Yes.

I would look to, as you are doing this, if I may, I know she's done the Pazuzu thing, so if I don't have time to do anything or react or say anything, I will just let it ride. Okay. Fourth page. An immobile, invisible, cube-shaped prism composed of magical force springs into existence around an area you choose within range 100%.

feet. The prison can be a cage or a solid box as you choose. I choose cage. So there are bars of vertical caprice colored energy in all directions, 20 feet by 20 feet on a side and is made of one half inch diameter bars spaced one half inch apart.

A prison in the shape of a box can be up to 10 feet on the side, creating a solid barrier that prevents any matter from passing through it. When you cast the spell, any creature that is completely inside the cage's area is trapped. Creatures only partially within the area or too large to fit are pushed away from the center of the area until they are completely outside. A creature inside the cage cannot leave it by magical means.

Is that a lid?

It's just a fake box that I just trapped you inside. But we are able to see through it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There are vertical bars. So there is no roof to this. It's not a box. It's a cage. So all six sides are stopping you from progressing. I've used my biggest magic to try to trap the three of you out of terror, not knowing what Iris is about to do. And then I see her do that.

You see, as I'll finish my description of what happens... Oh boy. As you see Iris rise, as she's radiating with golden light, and as you play whatever core you need to, to completely encage and entomb these people, you, Iris, rise up, certain of what you must do. As you then say, "Pazuzu."

Pazuzu. Between each one, I slam my staff down on the ground. Pazuzu, slam. Pazuzu, slam. Neither did I. As your voice says, "No." As your body begins to shift and shape and grow. My body? Yes.

as suddenly all the feline features elongate and change as you see not Iris before you, but it is. There's still the elements of her, but she stands as a no longer a cat, a jackal still wearing her vestments as she blasts and radiates out to all of you. As Iris, you feel

Your mind completely... It's yours, but it's also Anubis's. You are sharing consciousness as you stand and grow and even larger than your Anubian divine guardian and blasting... What was that? I said, yeah, fuck that guy. Yeah. Guardian, and it radiates with the light of a desert sun. And to the three of you,

This light is so, is so horrifically vile

and disgusting. It is the worst possible thing you can imagine. It is hideous. It is painful to be bathed in this light. I put this bulb on me. Yes, I have to breathe! You don't know what you're doing! Are you able to react? Yes, as you feel the horrible light on you, it is burning your skin. It is singeing you.

As you see Iris, this jackal-headed avatar of Anubis stare down at you as it says,

Dark vestiges, you have no power. In the light of Anubis, the light of the Osirian pantheon, be banished back from whence you came.

as it radiates out, and you suddenly feel the horrible shifting and cracking of bone as you begin to feel the presence of these things almost knocked out of you.

As Iris, as Anubis' mind almost melds with yours, you suddenly feel at home as you regain that full control, and you know that Anubis is there. You're able to act now. You feel temporarily.

as the Avatar of Anubis. What do you do? I don't know. What can I do? That's a great question. You can judge the weight of a soul and decide what... Caprice, dead. Felix, dead. I'm just kidding. So I will say, as you rise, you feel your power radiating the pulse of your Ka, of Ankatap's Ka.

blasting out and bathing these three abominations in light, and you feel, and all of you feel now desperate to stop what's happening as you are, as the dark vestiges that are in your minds, in your souls are attempting to do that. What do you say?

Oh, as I'm shrinking from the light and being burned, I would say, this is not the way. There is no point or hope in mortality. You can become more than mortal. It's the only logical way. And I will attempt to...

bloop, blink out of this cage. If I, you said I can use what is-- You can use teleportation magic. Yes, so I will attempt-- Or interplanar travel, so I would presume that you could make a charisma saving throw to try and beat-- Which I'm not very good at to be realistic here. But I would try to Dimension Door because that is-- Well, it's conjuration. Well, it's spell safety C18. It says you teleport yourself. Does that count as teleportation magic? Yes, yes, yes. So while you do that, what are you two doing in this instant as you feel the pulse?

I will scream, no! This was our only way! It was our only hope! You're all weak! All of you! You'll never accomplish anything without this! I guide 20. I'll basically be smashing the sides of the force cage helplessly. Okay. With my corrupted totem. What are you doing? I would be screeching from the pain of the light, but still trying to

force my goopy, gelatinous body through the caged bars, even though I can't. It's like Play-Doh going through. You're attempting to push the Play-Doh, and you see a little bit, and then it gets pushed back in, and your squishy body, you know you can shrink yourself and slither out, but it's force, and you aren't able to do it. Too clean and too stupid! I pass the saving throw, so I would teleport directly, like,

on top of Caprice essentially, blinding him instantly. - Okay. - And then I will use one of my motes to attempt to kill him. - Yeah, absolutely. You do that. And as this is happening, Iris, what are you doing? - I will turn to Toa. And I'm imagining like two golden beams shooting out of my eyes and like boring into you. - Toa Kamanui.

You have been fooled. You have been tricked. You are not stupid. Is this something I can counter spell? You are strong. I don't see why you couldn't. No, I'm not. You guys want to wrap this up real quick? Let's not. Let's not interrupt. So this is happening while... So let's pause on this. 21 hit. Pause. Yeah, 21 hit, but is it a spell? Let's pause it. It is not a spell for this instance. You cannot counter spell this. Oh, okay. But let's pause this. Sure. And then continue what you're saying. You are not stupid.

You are strong. You always have been. Your innocence is what makes you better than so many others in this world. I have seen it in you. I have believed in you. And so has Felix. Do not let fear control you.

And then I will turn to Lifty and I will say... Okay, let's... As you say that, you resolve and you hit him and do whatever damage you're going to do. I'm going to re-roll that bad boy. I'm going to re-roll this bad boy. Okay.

Oh, that's good. That's good. Man, it's not good for Caprice. It's going to be 18 plus 12 is 30 plus 4 is 34. 39 points of... Well, we'll call it 4 points of psychic damage and 35 points of...

some sort of horrific radiant damage. - So as you say that, you see this blue monstrosity that was Felix leap forward and shoot down, shoot Caprice's horrible Eldritch Star blast into him. - How do you go down? Oh, you fuck! God damn it! Why? Felix, what are you doing? Just stay in your cage, get back in your cage! - How do I feel about what she said?

That's a great question. I would say that it blasts and as you feel the pulse, it rings true and we're going to basically finish the rest of Iris' biz and then we'll see what happens. But you feel that pulse and it's starting to make sense and then once again, the darkness takes over you. And I will say, no, you think I'm stupid, but you're all weak. All of you are weak and pathetic. And then before I turn to Lufty, I'll say, Toa, I love you. You're family.

And I will turn to Lufty and I will say, you had always been beautiful to me. You were always more than you gave yourself credit for. And though I allowed my fear of your capabilities to let us truly hone and harness our friendship in the beginning, you are my sister now.

And Lufti would never succumb to this. You don't need to be a queen because to me, you already are. And then I will turn to Felix. - Who is literally like, you see him just teleporting over. - Yeah, but now I've got the mind of a god in me, so I don't have human emotions, Mike, all right? - He crashes this beam into the reason he's like, "Oh fuck!" - I'm very clearly trying to kill him. - And you see as he is now-- - I'm readying my next spell. - Yeah.

I'm stuck in this cage. Felix. Your intelligence is immense, but you have been tricked. Your love for your brother and your love for your friends has blinded you to the evil that now resides within. The Felix that I know and the Felix that is in there is far too smart to be tricked. No.

that Milo will see you again. And it will be Felix Ackerman that saves him and not this horrific abomination before me. You are strong and you are smart and you will rise. And I'm going to begin to chant in a Nubian accent.

ritual or spell for, um, imprisonment and try and imprison their, the entities within them. How does that work? Uh, I don't know what it would sound like and it's not something I have on here but I have a god in me so we'll see what you let me do. Am I able to respond? Yes. Yeah, I would say that you're all able to respond now. And once again, just like Toa, you all feel the, the,

the grip released temporarily as you hear her. It makes sense. It is Felix hearing this. It is Lufty hearing this. If you want to respond first, you can. And I just basically, whatever happens, I put into your hands. Exactly. However you want to do it. And so...

You're saying that that entity... You have a brief moment of clarity. I have a moment of clarity. You have a brief moment of clarity. You're understanding it, and then once again, the dark power, the Queen of Poxes, then comes to your mind, and you're still you, but under the influence. So how Toa had responded aggressively, it's, you know, you understand it, you hear it, but then it comes back. We're still monsters, right? But you kind of might feel conflicted. Okay. So hearing that, I was...

Iris, you just need to take my hand. Just a moment. You're too clean. Very clean. As soon as Iris is done addressing me, for a brief moment, I look around.

like Felix again, but my eyes are wide and there are tears streaming down my face. It's the stars! My brain! It's in there! Iris, help me! And then it comes back and this is nothing like mortality. We will be greater. And before I try and perform whatever, Richard, basically just a

an entrapment spell that maybe I would have heard or tried, but I've never done it before. And before I say that, I'm going to call out to Anubis. Anubis, my body is yours. My soul is yours. Do as you will.

You ring that out and you see Iris, the canine Iris, looming over almost like a statue. As once again, Caprice, you're clawing back away from this monstrous Felix. As you all feel the horrible singe of golden light hit you. And as you say that, you...

I would say expend the highest level spell slot that you have available. - You got it, I still have my seventh. - I would say you use your seventh level spell slot. - It's all yours, Mike. - And it blasts out and suddenly you all hear a collective hiss or groan or roar of rage and bitterness and hatred as it bursts

and suddenly you all feel in this radiating blast of golden light, you feel the darkness, the dark gifts, the dark vestiges all ripped out of you and you see the slithering tendrils of

the slithering tendrils of these dark gifts, these dark vestiges rip out of you and suddenly you all feel the horrible, disgusting metamorphosis that comes over you, but in reverse. You all shrink and turn back. Your flesh returns to normal and it's agonizing. It's absolutely painful as you feel, but it's actually more painful to your souls as that dark power is ripped from you. And

you feel that darkness leave you as you collapse to the ground, as you then hear this horrible hissing and roaring of anger from Toa's dark vestige, as they all slither out, screaming towards the door and disappear in silence.

The room falls quiet as you then, Iris, suddenly feel your own transformation. Metamorphosis, reverse, as you feel Anubis' consciousness leaving you.

but not his presence. As you suddenly slump back down, exhausted. Can I just be knocked unconscious? Because that was a lot. No one's unconscious. I would like to be. Okay, you're unconscious. I would literally fall unconscious. Like not dead, but like that's a lot. Iris is completely exhausted, unconscious. She falls to the ground. You are all on the verge of consciousness, but you feel it and you're overly pained as you collapse to the ground and quiet returns. Felix, get off me.

Iris falls unconscious. Oh, we're playing, sorry. Iris falls unconscious to the ground, the light no longer radiating. Quiet finally returns and you saw the hissing, shrieking dark vestiges slithering out and then disappearing out of the door. And all quiet returns to the Amber Temple. The four of you conscious

Caprice horribly wounded. The three of you crumple to the ground. You're conscious, but you're exhausted. You're in pain. And suddenly your minds return. It's a very bizarre experience. Have I up-fit-ed?

You're like right on top of him. I barely am able to push and roll you off. I am shaking. My eyes are wide, and I'm just crying. I'm so sorry. Caprice, I'm so sorry. My brain is in the infinite stars. Please tell me that sorry means that you're okay. Are you with yourself again? Are you whole? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'll take that as yes. Fuck. Fuck.

I have a question, Dungeon Master. I mean, Compression Jim. Thank you. It's Compression for Tilda, actually. It's Compression Moak. Oh, sorry, Compression Moak? I don't really like Jim. Okay, it's Gruntilda. Do we have any kind of-- Wait, who even decided that Jim was short for Gruntilda? Is it?

So what? Is it, uh, so are there sort of like two ways to kind of approach this? Is it, oh, we have this horrible, like this realization, oh my god, what an awful, evil thing that happened, and I never should have done that, and I was tricked, and I have ultimate, like full, full, full regret and remorse, or is there any like, oh no, like, is there any like half regret where like I still feel like, oh no, I lost all this power, or?

I'd say however Toa would feel about it, right? I think that you can really... It's yours to decide. You had been thinking legitimate thoughts with...

I forget the name, Tarhawk or Hartawk or whatever his name was. - Tarhawk, my new best friend. - Your best friend, and you were feeling those things legitimately, but it was under the influence of the dark vestiges. - Do we have like full understanding of everything? - Yes, you understand what you were driven to do, you understand your goals, you understand what you want to do. - And I am very sorry. - And so, but I probably hear you in relief. - Do I understand what you're doing?

Do I understand what I looked like? Yes. Absolutely.

- No. - And are we still in the cage? - No, no, the cage, as soon as Felix drops on me and he says, "I'm sorry," I would have undone the cage and been like, "At least Felix is back with me. Iris is unconscious. I need companions. I need to not be alone at the top of a frigid ice mountain in the middle of the Amber Temple filled with who knows what eldritch abominations. Where are my friends? What's happening?"

I feel so weak. I feel so weak. Speaking of that, uh, uh, everyone but Caprice takes a level of exhaustion. Oh, wow. Sweet. Um... I was so strong. I was tricked. Your magic didn't work, Caprice. Iris! I'm gonna just try to get up. Like, am I able to stand up? Yes. Okay. And I'm going to...

Don't blame yourself. The fact that whatever punched through that magic and affected your mind, that's not on you. All right? That's true. And I'm going to sort of stumble and I'm going to run to Iris's unconscious body and I'll like say, Iris, are you okay? Please wake up.

and I'm gonna just check to make sure she's alive. - Is she okay? I'm gonna try to stand up and then slip in my own goop and fall down. - Oh yeah, there's a huge slime trail, it smells putrid, so that remnant is there. - I'll stand and I will help heat Felix up. - Come on, come on, come on. - I am shaking and I'm pale and I take your hand. - I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry. - It happens. - I'm gonna stand up and then find something to lean against.

If there's nothing nearby... Then I would just hold on to you. And you're able to find there's tables, they're all broken in and it's the ruins of a library, but you're able to find plenty of stuff to rest in. And see that you need the extra support. And I'm now paying very close attention to how Toa treats Iris. I would join you and... Iris, please wake up, I'm so sorry. I don't need to be a queen. I just want you back, please.

I'll be trying to wake her up. And if Iris wants to wake up and... I do, I just want to finish writing my note. So she's groggy, you see her eyes fluttering. She's alive, she's fine. Yeah, I'm not dead, I just wanted it for the dramatic effect. She used all of her exhaustion, just how you felt in your transformations. I was already two levels of exhaustion when that happened, so...

She's very exhausted. She's feeling... As Lufty says that, you'll see Iris' eyes kind of flutter open, and I'll look up to you, and I'll slowly raise my paw and put it on your face. I told you already, Lufty. To me, you already are a queen. I love you.

I'm so sorry. Me too. I love you too, Iris. You are my family. And I can't believe I feel so stupid. You are. You're all right. I am stupid. I can trick so easily. Do you think Felix is stupid? No, he's very smart.

Felix also succumbed to that dark power. Well, I'm sure there was a very good reason why he accepted, but it wasn't a good reason why I accepted besides getting tricked! And it's not because either one of you was stupid or weak. Or me, right? Or you. My mind was not my own. I felt sympathetic to the voices. I mean, to the voice.

Of course you did. You're kind-hearted. You're wonderful. All of you are. Iris, thank you for saving me. Do not thank me. I had the soul of God in me. Could not have done that without Lubits. But he needs our help. He told me that we must go to him immediately. To a realm of shadow. And I'm afraid. How do we get there?

A musician. Uh, did I...

catch in the process of this that I may have understood that perhaps more time has passed than an hour or a day or maybe even a week, that we lost time. I would say, just for the sake of this, that you all start to feel the way that your magical powers work, that you can sense that a long time has passed. I'll give you that. You don't know how long. You don't know how long.

This change that affected you and the voices that tried to compel us into the same, this wasn't something that happened over the last hour or so. It sure isn't just down the hall.

We've been up here for who knows how long. For perhaps weeks. Alright? But how could he have escaped? Is he dead? What if he was like us? Did he take power from something else and just leave us?

If his experience was anything like mine, he had the ability to say no. And I imagine someone with that amount of will. Yeah, I imagine that he probably would have said no, but he had to get out on his own. Or the key. Maybe the key protected him. It was made of amber. Smart thinking. See, I knew he was smart. But where did we go? I mean, maybe we just vanished. And he left. Because he didn't know what else to do.

If there were some non-affected observer standing in the hallway watching for the last however many days or weeks, we probably would have watched comatose Iris and I just sitting and staring into nothing, and you guys slowly transforming into the forms that we ultimately confront. Not something that happened instantaneously. I do not believe that Esha had ill will in leaving us here.

We can't rest up here.

We've got to get out of this temple. We've got to get somewhere as far away as possible. Yeah, if we can, we should all try to zoop down the side of the mountain. Just brunt force. Can we teleport or somehow message Esher? I don't know. I'm incredibly weak. I will not be able to walk. Can we fly? No.

Just give me... If we can make it out of the temple without something else offering us and transforming us these horrible gifts. Just a moment. Um, Felix? Yeah. Are you my best friend? Of course, always. Okay. You're also my best friend. Thanks. Thanks.

I give him a big hug. I'm like still shaking and like very much just not in the right place of mind. Right. And I'll just, you're sort of like looking past me. Yeah. Just like put you down. Sorry, just get some rest. We need to let Iris rest. Can you get up, Iris? Are you okay? I would like to lay here for a while. I have three levels of exhaustion, if that were a thing. Oh, um.

I look for anything that could be like a pillow and a blanket and just try to find anything that would make Iris comfortable. And I no longer have any charges with my staff, so I cannot get rid of levels of exhaustion. Is there anything in the room that would be like pillows, blankets, that sort of thing? Yeah, I would say that there's probably remnants of probably the softest thing you could probably bunch up on

tapestries and things that would be a little bit more plush, things like that, and remnants of furniture. You could probably pull the rotting down or something out. But you know, you'd be able to find, you could make something soft. Okay, I'll try to pull some just gross, the least gross tapestries down and like run it over Iris and I'll like put one over her and then I'll like sort of fold another one up, be a pillow. Hey, just rest. Thank you. Thank you. We all need to thank Caprice.

If it had not been for your quick thinking with that force gauge, I don't think you and I would have survived that. I don't think we would have had time to beseech Anubis for his help. You saved our lives, Caprice. You saved our lives, Iris. And I have to say that I have questioned your loyalty, and I hope you understand that. Yeah. But you have proven to me by not taking this gift that you have learned from what happened with that...

Lady in the shadows, you have my full trust. Thank you. It was remarkably easy to say no, given what's happened to me. I'm here for the bitter end. Or the sweet end, if we're going to be a little optimistic and hopeful. I would like to be. Well, let's shoot for the sweet end. What, uh...

What does it take for us to get out of here? How can we get out? Because I think that if I can, if we can get to the surface of the mountain, maybe there's a way for me to carry all four of you. Well, I can carry you. I'm tired, but I'm okay. Well, I mean, if you must. All right, let me just wrap you up like a nice...

Do burritos exist? Yeah. Cat burrito. Like a nice sushi burrito. And I'm going to wrap her. Sushi-rito. I'm going to wrap her in the tapestry and I'll pick her up. I think I can walk. Maybe I could just hold on to someone's shoulder or arm or...

Something I'm pretty tired and feeling a little slow. You can sit on my shoulders if you'd like, and I'll lean down. I'll just, I'm gonna, every time you step, she kicks Iris in the face. I'm gonna just kind of cross my arms on myself and cast Levitate and just kind of hold onto your short tail or your skirt and just kind of fall alone.

- Like a balloon. - Like a sad little balloon. - Like a little blue balloon. - Caprice, I think you should lead the way. - I'll walk next to you. - All right. Let's go.

and I will attempt to lead them down the stairs, out the tunnel, through the passages that we had to go past the big statue and out the front of the Amber Temple if I can. You do that. You make your way. You are feeling exhausted. You make your way out of the library. You walk down the stairs into that familiar...

Into that familiar space and where you had seen three sarcophagi, or I suppose two sarcophagi standing and one shattered, one that I believe Escher had mentioned had once belonged to and had some entity called the Blood Queen. You now see the wreckage of two sarcophagi. One cracked.

just as the one that you had seen. But after the divine intervention that's been here, you no longer feel the pull. It's no longer able to twist your mind, your sense of time and space. You get the sense that perhaps if someone entered here, you're not sure if they would be spared. But at the center of this... Not the center of this realm. Besides one of the other very large piles of amber, you see a body lying

On his back, you see Escher. He's lying with one arm out and the other gripping the amber key that seems to have plunged into his chest. You see that the amber key now, where it once has been that beautiful amber color, is now swirling almost nearly black. What do you do?

I would run up immediately. I'd hobble over. As the person with perhaps the most faculty at this point, I would reach at you first, and I will not try to remove the key. I will not try to do anything, but I will try to touch the head and get a sense of if his life force, as undead as it might be, is still in him or if he is truly beyond the veil. Message check. Yeah. All right. Okay.

He doesn't have a pulse. He doesn't have a pulse. Duh, Caprice. You run over. Is he okay? I'm sure it's fine. You need to wallast himself. 18. 18. You check his vitals, and you look at his eyes as you look into them and check his pulse. He is down.

But he's always been dead. You got Kelsey good. He died in the moment that he shared with you from some woman whom he used to love named Stradania. Yes. But he seems to be dead. You don't, you are not versed in the arts of whether an undead creature has life that he's still there. It

It is, it eludes you. But he is very immobile. And his hand is still clutching the, and you can only really see the key through the fingers and the bit at the end. Nobody touch the key. No, Toa put me down. Are you sure? Yes. You're very weak. Oh, believe me, I know. Well, you need to give me some time to unwrap you. I'd wrap you very tight. You just, you roll the anise lamp on the ground.

- Instead of a concussion you get when you spin really fast, your brain just can't rattle. - Have you ever seen Jackie Chan's first strike? The moment when he jumps off the tower after, okay. - And I just, I sort of try as quickly as I can. I unwrap her and I'll set you down. - I'm going to very slowly move towards Caprice and Escher. And then when I get to him, I'm gonna kneel down and I'm going to slowly open his mouth. I'm gonna take one of my cat claws and slice into my palm.

and drop four drops of blood into his mouth. Okay. I love that face. I love Mike's face. Okay. You do this. You lean in and you drop one, two, three, four. You close his mouth again. And I did roll four, so I'll take four.

Hit points. And... Oh, she's damaged. Nothing happens. And then you see his hand twitch. His eyelids flutter very, very gently. And there's some of his undead muscles start to twitch a bit and then go still again, gripping tightly. I see what you mean. I would propose we do that again if we remove the key first.

I think we should remove the key first. I think we should be prepared to feed him. Do we have any volunteers? I've got it. I'm ready to go. I have blood. You're all exhausted. I can look at your faces. I'm tired, but I have... I'm hearty. I'm resilient. I have a lot of blood. I already know he likes mine, so... What do you mean? What? Huh? I'm willing to help. Well...

Let us all stand over him. Caprice, I would say maybe on the count of three, you pull the key from his chest and we'll all begin pouring our blood into his mouth. This sounds horrible. Why don't we just remove the key first and see what happens? Well, because we don't want him to immediately die. Well, he's already dead, but immediately cease to exist. All right. Daggers out.

I ready my Ravenclaw dagger. And I'll go through my pack to find something sharp. Yeah, can I use yours? I take three claws. You can take my dagger. There you go. I take two claws. I've got my rapier. I'll be all right. To us. I just have the spoon. It's kind of dumb. This is going to hurt. On the count of three.

I'm going to say one, two, three, and then we're going to go. Not when I say three. We will slice on two and squeeze on three. No, we're going to squeeze on go. We're going to slice on three and squeeze on go. All right, all right. As long as it's... Shit. Hold on, hold on. I just need to...

I need to get in my battle trains, okay? And I won't mechanically reach to reduce the damage of this. And you'll see my eyes. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. What? What are you doing? Actually, I'm focused now. Return to us, Thesha. One, two, three.

Three. Go! And I pull the, on go, I pull the, as we all drip blood from hand to hand as closely, we're literally doing like Mighty Duck style, like it has to be really close to get into his mouth. You do that and you feel a horrible sense as you grab the amber key. Oh.

You pry it from his chest, and it rips out with a sickening crack. And as soon as that happens, you see Escher's eyes open wide as he...

And he gasps in his undying, and his array of blood falls into his mouth. And you see now where he had been incredibly hollow, he looked like far more withered than you had seen him when you first met him. And as the blood fills him, and you, Caprice.

As you yank the key, you hear a voice in your mind, "Bring me." Oh my god! Fuck no. And you yank it and suddenly you feel a horrible darkness, but then again, it's pushed back into the key.

And you are holding it and you feel this nearly black amber key as you hold it. And Escher sputters and he looks incredibly weak still, but you see his flesh start to fill out a bit more, the darkness around his eyes. The darkness around his eyes is decreasing his normal, not his full complexion.

'cause you know he needs to drink a lot of blood and get sold real true soul essence to really feel. I kill myself and... I feed him my breath. I cast Turn Inside Out. As he sputters and swallows-- I cast Hangnail Zipper. As he-- All of you. He knows that he doesn't need to breathe, but from just his mortal life, it's he...

What the fuck happened? What happened? Andrew, what happened for you when you left right after we killed Exothander? What happened for you when we immediately ran out into the hallway? I was here. I was here. No, the key. The key? It's filled with whatever being I'm assuming possessed you. You stabbed yourself maybe in the chest. Maybe. Yes, it was automatic.

We found you out here. I accept it. You accept it? And then a split second I knew better, and it worked. Now that thing is in it. Well, can we put it back into the Amber Serphophagite it came from? He points over and it's just complete rubble. Can we put it into the one of the other Amber Serphophagite? Yeah, maybe one's vacant. I don't know. I don't think so. That was the thing that gave Exothantor his power. Who's key?

Tenebrous, the being inside that key. Tenebrous the what? Just Tenebrous. Is he related to just mademoiselle? What happened to you when you accepted? I felt the power feeling me, changing my mind. But I had a brief moment and

I plunge the key into my chest. And it must have worked. It stopped you from transforming. We don't know if it's been hours or days or weeks. A whole time and space was lost. These three, they accepted and they were transformed horribly. They didn't have this protective talisman, whatever you want to call it. Charm? We came here for nothing. Why do you say that?

We can't fix the key? We have to be able to do something. Don't give up! Do any of you know how this amber magic works? Well, maybe it can hold two of these horrible evil beings inside. Do we know that it can? We could try. You really are stupid. Do not say that to Toa. Yeah, I don't want to hear any of your lectures. You said we could come up here and find answers.

Did you just say "hemst" ? Well, I was wrong. Well, then you're just as stupid as the rest of us! You're right, I am! We should have let you starve. Yes, you should have. I should just stay here. I'm going to lean down and slap him across the face. Get yourself together, man! I don't have time for this. Uh, make an intimidation check.

Fuck. You've got to be proficient in that. No. Thank you, noses die. Oh, baby. And you said, you said intimidation. I don't know if a 27 is going to work. You smack, literally smack the sense into him as his eyes flutter. I deserve that. I'm sorry. Yeah, you did. Get your shit together. Come on. I'm sorry. Yes. Let's go. Forgive me.

Forgive me. And he slowly stands up and he says... I put my finger in his face. Don't you ever call Toa stupid again or you will face me. Do you understand? I do. No, he's right. No, you shut your mouth, Toa. Don't be stupid. I need to be less stupid. Toa, don't you ever call yourself stupid again or you'll face me. I love you. I...

I never would have accepted the deal. I guess Felix accepted it and he's not stupid. No, you're right. I won't say it. Yeah, don't call yourself stupid. You call Toa stupid. That's a friend of mine. You'll have me to face about it. For what it's worth, they're right. You shouldn't. But I wasn't all stupid. It happens to the best of us. Well, maybe...

When we finally get a chance to relax and rest, you could give me a book or two that I could maybe read and start to get smarter, you know? I think you're smart enough already. We just gotta be more careful.

How much more careful can we be? We have taken calculated risks. We came up here knowing there was great danger and we got kind of super fucked and we survived and that's great and fine and I'm proud of all of us and now I've got this key. What do I do with this fucking thing? Nightmare abominations. I do not know. Perhaps we can find a way to free whatever this entity is.

Free at where? I don't care. Well, I do. We can't just let this entity roam free in Aventress. Yeah, it was in here for a reason. Alexa Thantor is dead. The wizards are dead. This wizard's not. And he's the most capable wizard I've ever met. Thanks. I have a question. Yes. Do I recall...

any particular details of the sarcophagi that were still whole, if they have keyholes. - Make, I would say that you'd be able to tell that they do not have keyholes. - That's nuts right now. - Yeah, thank you Iris. I wish I could come up with an answer. I just don't know enough about these.

types of magics. If there was something that we could learn about or study, we might be able to figure it out. I would like to cast Legend more. I'm just kidding, I didn't take it. As you stand there looking at the key, you feel that presence inside Caprice. I'm gonna get a crock. And as you all sit there, you look over and you hear as the amber...

sarcophagus, the one that remains in this room, the shape starts to twist and shape, and you feel like it is growing larger. And you start to feel its pull. We should really get going. We have to get out of here. Yeah, we can't stay here any longer than we need to. Do we need this key? Should I just leave the key? No! We need to figure out a way to get the fuck is in there out so I can use it on Ravinovia.

Drizlash is going in that key. I don't care. Oh, I see. So we need to get the entity out. I'm not a fan of getting entities out of anywhere, all right? Let me just put that on the record right now. If... Do you have anything back at your castle that we might be able to do work on this and together we might be able to figure out a solution? There may have been something in the library of Exothantib, but it's all gone. It's all destroyed.

But there has to be knowledge somewhere. Can we talk about this outside? Yes, can we leave? I'd really like to leave. Do you need help? Iris, can you walk? Should I carry him? I don't think so. Oh, right, all right. I'll wrap him back up and I'll leave. Let us rest at the ruins of the barbarian village. Can you regain strength off of animal blood?

Yes, it's not ideal. Then we will try to find something for you to feed on, on our adventure. I may be able to help in that regard, and I think I have a solution for this key, if I can sing it a little song. Let's get back to the camp, those huts, the barbarian camp, and we'll take it from there. We just need to get out of this fucking hellhole. Yes. Yes. Yes.

We have a lot to talk about this evening. You make your way through the Amber Temple. You see the cracked remnants of the sarcophagi for those of you who had accepted. Those, you even see the, for Caprice and Iris, the sarcophagi that you had accepted before remain whole but cracked. And can you hear it...

As it continues, and you feel the presence, the call of these things increasing. Thanks for the compliment, you sexy bitch. That's where the divine, whatever divine blessing is upon you is still holding. As you heave the door open, and immediately you're blasted with snow and wind as you recall, unfortunately, just how bitterly cold. You know it's not too long.

to the barbarian village that's near this place. And you make it as quickly as you possibly can. You heave your way through the snow as you see the mountain looming up, and you look back just one moment as you see a massive bit of snow get blown in front of the door as it starts to pile up once more as you look back and you turn around to pass, hopefully leaving the Amber Temple behind you forever.

And you travel. And for the purpose of this, we'll need one constitution saving throw as you as the bitter cold chills you to the bone and you eventually arrive at the ruins of the village that had been brutally murdered by Ravinovi, whatever spiderlings that she had with her.

I'm still advantage. Well, I'm disadvantage. Are we doing one for the whole group? No, no, each of you. Oh, okay. I rolled a natural one. You got a 27. I think you should twist that. I'm at disadvantage, so the chances that I'm even going to... Oh, shit, why? The later ones are ability checks or saving throws. Does a twist trigger another disadvantage? No, it is rolling another die. Add an additional die to the...

Yeah, can you take a twist out for me? You said it's a saving throw, right? Yep. Okay, so I'm okay. I'm 16. It's only ability checks right now. 17. 17? Anyone got below a 16? 24. Oh, I made it! 16 is the DC. As you arrive, you see the charred remains of the hut where you had burned all the bodies and the hut. And you see that one...

standing still, as you manage to make your way, that had the, you had cleared out all the webs, cleared out all the bodies, given them a proper burial. I'm not sure if that's what they would have wanted, but it doesn't matter. Better than them frozen in time, forever, perhaps. As you make your way, you close the door and the snow blasts against and you hear the howling wind all around this hut, but it is quiet. What do you do? I...

would begin laying out the scrolls that we found if I was so allowed to be the one who held them and just look at what we had. You had them on your person, transformed. You still have them on your person like any of the rest of your inventory, right? Then I would just kind of lay them out knowing that, you know, you might be able to use them, right? You can cast it, right? You could cast it or you could study it. But you can't...

permanently learn anything from them, can you? No, I can look at them and be like, neat, maybe I could read some of those. Fuck. Okay. If it's a spell scroll that matches my class, then I could potentially enjoy it. Unless it's above a spell scroll level of what I could potentially cast, and then there's additional rules I can't remember. Okay.

I would just be looking through them. - Yeah, and you see that it's the five spells. I mean, you get the sense that there were hundreds of spell scrolls in this library that had been destroyed. - Just the wizards, like, wizards' bane. - You now get the sense that if Ravinovia had arrived

and undergone some sort of similar bargain with Drizlash that perhaps she had some sort of transformation herself. Oh, God. She's probably some horrific creature now. Oh, God, no. I can't wait to see what that looks like. I have an idea based on my reading of Chris Estrade. And Escher is very quiet the whole way.

He looks at the key, seems to be, have lost hope once more. As the doors close, you hear the howling wind. It is still incredibly frigid, but it's still far warmer in here out of the windchill. Are you sure I have a plan? Yes, Caprice, what is your plan?

Well, I need to know if you think that the key before it was inhabited by this terrible entity was a non-magical key or if it had intrinsic magical properties. If it was just amber and it was in the form factor that it was in, I don't want to destroy it in order to free the entity because that means that we will have a destroyed key and we won't be able to benefit your daughter through it in the future. No circumstances are we to destroy that thing.

It is magical amber, it's not like you can just create, just go to a tree and shape it into a key and it works. It's the magical amber. I'm an alchemist. I'm not nearly as well versed in the arcane arts as Exthanta, especially, and even those wizards. They turn into flames. That is clear. Sap comes from a tree. Amber you will find in stone. It's petrified sap.

Yes. Not fresh sap. That's what I mean. Was this original key made by the petrified sap that Iris described, or does it carry additional properties? If I were to break this key, we would be lost. Even if you could break that key, and I don't know that you can, it is a... It's an ancient magic. It comes from...

The realms of shadow of death, the realms of the shadow fell beyond them in the mist. So what you're saying, and just to re-synthesize what you're saying, back at you, we need to free the entity, but we have to keep the key intact. Yes. What? Whether or not, if the key is filled or it's shattered, it's worthless to us.

But the very least, if there's any chance for us to get that thing out of it, I don't care how, then we can perhaps use it on Ravenovia. Well, I have two ideas on that front. What was the deal that you were offered by the voice that's now contained within this cave?

What do you mean the deal? It was a gift. Some voice came to you. I was offered the ability to seduce, to be sexy to others, to attract, to have my way with whomever I want. It was...

Should we let the pugs calm down? The pugs are bugging us. I want to hear Kelsey go, I love you. I love you. So that's what I do to Remy, and he goes, ballistic. He hates it. When I say, I love you, Remy. He's like, ah! Literally the Tasmanian devil animation from the ball. Yes, it's very accurate. It's like a tornado with arms and crazy shit coming out of it. They are our attack pugs. Yeah.

What did the voice tell you? What did it offer you? It offered me arcane secrets, recipes, a chance, a knowledge that I thought that I could utilize to save Ravenovia, undo all of this. It sounded so appealing, but I knew better in a moment of clarity, brief moment of clarity. I almost involuntarily punctured myself with that thing.

Whatever's trapped in this thing will only come out, I would imagine, because it thinks it can offer a gift again, similar to the sarcophagi. Can that be how that works? Or you might have to puncture someone else with it. Does it work both ways? Like, can it leave? Just puncture someone else? Well, I'll at least try. Oh!

That's badass. Where did you get this? You gave it to me like two years ago. It's been here for two years. I recognize it instantly as the souvenir I got in London at Windsor Castle. What a goofy bitch this is. What a goofy bitch. It's about that size. That would hurt. It could hurt, but with the four of you, I feel like... It's not, it was in my chest for God's know how long.

It's not going to transfer into you. The purpose of that is to... My understanding is to take something and you can throw it away, I don't know. There may be knowledge that we can figure out how to use it, but I am ill-equipped. It would be ridiculous to stab yourself in the chest with that. The only reason we were able to free Lufty, Felix, and Toa was with the power of a god. A god that is weakened and cannot help me again.

You would be lost to us. Well, I don't want to do that. I'm just talking about possibilities right now. What? Wow, that's not a possibility. She just said it. We can't bring you back, so that's a no. We freed you from one dark entity. Let us not have to free you from another. I think Esher should take it. He should carry it. He figures out what to do with it. You can do research and stuff, right?

I suppose. Learn about it. You can turn into mist and fly around and figure out what to do. Yes, perhaps. We also don't have to solve this mystery at the top of this mountain. We should get some rest. Yes. Perhaps. Just don't stab yourself with it again. Think about it. Perhaps. And he grabs that and he puts it in his coat. Well, you all look terrible. Well, thank you.

Let's get some rest. It's a long journey back. Some sleep. As we're just preparing to go to sleep, I've removed 750 gold from my inventory. It's going to take me a total of 14 hours to copy and learn the teleportation. Okay. But I'm going to start working on it.

So I might spend four hours one night, four hours, you know what I mean? Yeah. It's going to take me some time. So I roll up the other scrolls and I have the television scroll laid out in front of me. And as we're all kind of easing in, I've been listening to the conversation, but I begin to just write my book. And Escher will look and say, Felix, boy, it's maybe better for you just to work on that. We rest here and then you use it.

It'll be safer than us trying to make the journey home. Oh, God. Asher, you have to understand, this is going to take me... I mean, it could take me a day and a half, almost two days. Lovely, I could sleep a day and a half, almost two days. But then I'd never even cast it. There's so many things that could go wrong. We could end up in a wall. We saw that we passed a beast. We are weak and tired. We're at least safe from the elements in this hut. The gigantic eagle and then the gigantic goat. It was a rock.

There was a rock? Yeah, there were a lot of rocks. Um... You're right, Woody, there were. Okay, okay, if that's what you guys want, I can just work straight through. We can even you. You'll be fine. You're really smart. All right, I'll work as fast as I can. I'll work straight through all the way until I'm done, and then it'll be fresh in my brain, and I'll just be able to cast it. Right? Yes.

Nothing will ever go wrong. No, it'll be fine. No, it'll be fine. You know how to use spells, and it'll be just fine. Just like every other time you use a spell. Okay, if you need me, I'll be right here for the next 14 hours. That's fine. It's just like a study session back at the academy. No big deal. Just to pull all-nighters all the time. No big deal. No big deal. Okay. No pressure. Um, if anybody felt like making tea, that might be nice. Oh...

I'm just going to get to work. I'll say, sure. And then I'll just, I'll pull out a cup and like put some wine or something in it. Drink up. Oh,

He completely fails putting it in because he's so blitz. By the time he's drinking all the wine, it doesn't make any sense. You're going to cast a spell and our body parts are taken apart and teleported all over the globe. Do you know what spaghettification is? Yes, I spaghettify us all over Evantris. It was close to dusk when you arrived and

And at this point, you light a fire, you warm your bones, and you settle down in this hut. There's a little bit, you can get a sense where there actually would have been a tenting to let the smoke out that had been built in. You're able to clear it of the snow. And you settle in, and you feel like night has just fallen. And as you hear, lose the elements, the wind, it dies down a bit. And then as you're settling in, you hear, "Fuh, fuh."

The beating of massive wings, and you hear the reverberating, booming cry of a rock.

Fucking rock. Thank you so much for listening to the Legends of Avantris podcast. We hope you enjoyed the session. If you want even more campaigns to listen to, become a member of our Patreon at the Pearl Dolphin tier or higher to unlock Shroud Over Saltmarsh, a patron-exclusive campaign set on the high seas. You can find that at patreon.com slash legendsofavantris.

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