87: Gabagool & the French Revolution
01:00:20 Share

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time. Now through March 25th, spring in for storewide deals and earn four times a point. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible beverage items like Red Bull and Sparkling Ice or breakfast favorites like Kellogg's Pop-Tarts, Kellogg's Frosted Flakes, and Kellogg's Eggo Waffles, plus many more. Then clip the offer in our app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

Direct from the Broski Nation headquarters in Los Angeles, California, this is the Broski Report with your host, Brittany Broski. Cause I could be a freak all to the day, all to the day. That's not right. To the early bird. Is that fucking TikTok sound? And I could be a freak all to the day, all to the day. Do y'all know what I'm talking about? And I could be a freak until the day, until the day.

This is on a constant loop in my fucking head. It's not right. Hold on. I can get it right. Play it again. He's got that church wail. He's got that gospel wail. I cannot do it. Oh, good for me.

Wait, me really trying. That was good. Who is that, by the way? Oh, I've watched him on YouTube. What is the fucking name? Durand Bernard. I love it. I love it, y'all. Oh my God. I love it, y'all.

guys welcome back to the broski report this week we are actually time traveling okay because if you're watching this right now i am in italy if you're listening to this right now as of the week of march 10th i'm actually in italy so if you see me in italy

Mind of my business. I'm actually going to be with my family. So we're doing a family vacation to Rome. We're actually doing the Orient Express, which is super fun. I have never, ever, ever in a million years did I think I would be on the Orient Express. So it's really fun because me and my dad love trains. Me and my dad and my brother love trains.

So, naturally, we're going to be doing the Orient Express into Rome, or into Verona, actually. And then we're taking a car to Rome, and then we're going to, I'm going to live my Red Rising fantasy, okay? My Greco-Roman Hellenistic futurism fantasy, all in this little nugget up here. Because life is something that, stay with me, life is what you imagine it to be.

Life is what I've created up here. And what I've chosen to see up here when I go to Rome, Italy is red rising. Okay. It's actually going to be, what's the fucking name? It's actually going to be the Phobos. Phobos? That's the moon. That's the moon that...

What's the one they blow up? Ganymede? The duck yards of Ganymede. Where are my Red Rising bitches at? Guys, Cassius Albalona's Razor Master class. Razor Master course, steel sharpens steel. You guys don't get Red Rising the way I do.

Holy shit. Okay, that is sort of my mindset going into my Italy trip. Of course, yes, I'm going to soak up all of the history. However, it's a bit tainted right now because a lot of my past year has been consumed by genuinely, and I don't mean this is like, are you on TikTok? I've been thinking about the Roman Empire a lot.

I watch a lot of National Geographic YouTube specials on the Roman Empire. Not even the Roman Empire. I watched one last night about the fall of ancient empires. So we discussed the Persian Empire. We discussed Egypt. We discussed how there was at one point in history –

Egyptian and Greek cultures kind of lived simultaneously. And while I say simultaneously, I don't necessarily mean peacefully, okay? Again, I need a linguist in the corner and I need a historian in the corner to be like, ah, you're lying. And then I'll be like, and then I'll sit here in silence and I'll listen to him talk and then I'll just regurgitate what he said.

One of these days, I'm going to do that. I'm going to be like, welcome to my home, sit in the corner, and I'm just going to talk. And if you find any incorrect information or I misspeak maybe, then just go ahead and jump in and correct me. If anyone knows any historians, send them my way because I'd like to employ them for a day on one of these podcast episodes. Anyway,

be fun to sort of deep dive into some, I'm going to practice some Italian sayings and phrases. Because recently, as we all know, I had this little stint where I said I was going to learn, I was going to learn French. Okay, now ask me if I've gotten anywhere on there. No, I have not made any progress on my French. So, oh, I forgot to tell you what I'm sipping on today. Here in my water, in my water bottle, in my water, is

What I can only assume to be expired liquid IV that was in my pantry because I ran out of Red Bull.

I ran out of Red Bull and I leave today for my trip. So I'm not going to go buy a bunch of groceries because that is wasteful. My fucking Red Bull ran out. So I had to go to my last resort. I had this capsule. I have a capsule in my pantry of emergency things if I have no food in the house. And guess what's in there?

canned tuna, because I usually always have gochujang and mayonnaise in the fridge, so I will make a spicy tuna with seaweed. That's a classic lunch in the Broski household. I always have tuna. I always have butter beans. Great source of protein, okay? You just chop up some pepperoncinis. This is a recipe I got from Alyssa's Magic. Shout out. It's butter beans. It's pepperoncinis.

or banana peppers, if you will, and a little bit of apple cider vinegar and olive oil and salt. And that's literally it. And you mix it all up, bean salad, fucking yum. And I keep liquid IV packets in my pantry at all times because sometimes I'm just super dehydrated. You know what I mean? I also, look, if we're talking like friends, I did a brand deal with them a while ago. They sent me a bunch of product. I'm still working through it. You know what I mean? So that is actually what's going to be in here.

is their version of an energy drink, liquid IV. And I Googled it. Each one, each packet is 100 milligrams of caffeine. In a Red Bull, it's about 110, 120 milligrams caffeine in the sort of 12 ounce ones. And this is my second one.

Because I'm just, I'm telling y'all, I have fuckered my system. We're fuckered. I tried out this new place recently. It's not new. It's new to me. Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf. That's like an LA staple. Everyone knows about that place. I never go. I've never been. I went yesterday. I said, give me three shots of espresso with a little bit of hazelnut in it and a little bit of oat milk. And he said, sure. That shit had me jacked up.

I was, I should clean my toilets. I should scrub the walls. I vacuumed every corner of my room. And well, the reason I did that, do you guys even give a fuck? I'm serious. Who gives a fuck? Who gives a fuck? Holy shit. Last night, I got my fucking vacuum because there was a big ass spider in my bathroom and

I am the man of the house. I am the patriarch, okay? You're looking at the face. You're looking at the patriarch of the household. And that's just how it is. That's just how I've designed it to be. So yeah, I turned around. And I was also naked. I was naked, about to hop in the shower. Big-ass brown recluse. Naked, ran through my house, grabbed the vacuum, sucked him up. There is a graveyard of scary big spiders in my vacuum bag because...

I don't want to kill it. And I don't want to smush it. Because what if it's pregnant? Do spiders have puss puss? Can spiders get preganart? Y'all remember those Reddit searches? Or those, those, no, what was that? Quora? You guys don't get me. Okay. What the fuck was I about to Google, dude? Seriously? And I could be a freak all through the day. All through the day. To the early morning. Okay.

Oh, you know what? Actually, I've been practicing this. I've been practicing this for when I'm in Italy. Ready? Time to say goodbye. It's Andrea Bocelli. And I've been practicing this for when I'm in Italy.

Wait, here's the actually Italian words. Conte. Piero. And who performed at my wedding? Andrea Bocelli. Who performed at her wedding? Andrea Bocelli. What the fuck? Anyway, sweating under my boobs challenge. Just shot snot everywhere. Jesus Christ.

off the liquid IV energy pack geeking. I had two liquid IV energy packs and now I'm geeking.

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time. Now through March 25th, spring in for storewide deals and earn four times a point. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible snacks like Lay's chips, garden veggie straws, and planters nuts or sweet treats from M&M's and Oreo, plus many more. Then clip the offer in our app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

Okay, here is the extent of my knowledge of Italian phrases. Ready? Buongiorno. Buongiorno. Buonasera. Arrivederci. Do they do the R-roll in Spanish? Arrivederci. Arrivederci. Arrivederci. Arrivederci. Ciao. Ciao, Ella. Per favore. Mi dispiace. How do you say, I don't understand? Non...

Non incluso. Non... How to say I don't understand in Italiano? Non capisco. Oh, capisce? What the fuck is capisce? Capisce? No capisce! And I could be a freak until the day! Until the day! Capisce is an informal pseudo-Italian slang term used to ask if someone understands. It can also be used as a threat. How it's used...

You must use this knowledge for good, not evil. Never for personal gain. Capisce? I'm not in the mafia. Never was. Capisce? That's, I get it. What do you think? This is a stupid question. Because here's my frame of reference, right? Actually, a lot of you young women in the comments could answer this. Also, by the way, young woman is fully encompassing, okay? As long as you're not a straight man, you're a young woman.

You have the soft and gentle nature of what a young woman represents, okay? So do you know how, like, Quebecois, right? Quebec is a province in Canada. They grow up speaking French as their first language. Correct me if I'm wrong. French and English are both, I guess, the national language. Let's Google it instead of just talking out of my ass. Official language of Quebec. French. French is the official language of Quebec.

Only French has that status. French is the only common language of the Quebec nation and constitutes one of the foundations of its identity and distinct culture. Now, is that because Quebec was a French colony? Was Quebec colonized by France?

Yes, Quebec was colonized by France as part of New France. France claimed the area in 1535 and it remained a French colony until 1763. Then it became a British colony known as the province of Quebec. Now that makes total sense because Canada and Australia and maybe New Zealand are part of the British Commonwealth. Okay? And was Australia a prison colony? Yes. And was Canada? No. So Quebec.

They grow up speaking French. When a person from Quebec goes to France, and this is what people have told me, okay? And they speak Quebecois French, which is essentially like a, I mean, it's a dialect. It's a form of French.

Right? The way that British English is different from American English is different from Australian English. You understand. When a Quebecois person goes to France and they speak French, the French person will respond in English.

Because it's almost like this redneck version of French to them, that it's not a purist. So if you're not going to speak pure, I will speak back to you in English. That is what my Canadian friends have told me. And first of all, fucked up, right? Second of all, third of all, I am trying to relate this to whatever that, and I'm sure there's a term for it. I'll Google it.

that generation of Italian immigrants that came to New York, Jersey, wherever, through the ports. What's the famous one in New York? Ellis Island. Ellis Island in New York was the main immigration port for Italians and other immigrants from Europe from 1892 to 1924. That's what I'm talking about. That generation of Italian Americans came

A very interesting form of English and Italian came from that group, that specific region and that specific time period.

And I want to know, is there a word for that language, the way that, like, Quebecois is used to refer to French spoken in Quebec? I want to know. The Italian that was spoken in those early days of, like, trying to acclimate to American culture and...

With that and with any immigration to America comes this kind of, and I'm speaking historically, loss of culture, right? Like you abandon it. I won't call it whitewashing. I'm going to call it like Americanizing, the Americanization of immigrants during this time period.

It was almost an intentional, firsthand thing to not be... You know what I mean? And the time has changed now where, of course, culture is embraced. Or at least we're moving towards that, where it's cool to have a culture. Because what we're realizing is America is void of culture. And what I mean by that is...

a distinct, well, actually, hold on, let's talk about this. There are aspects of American culture that are distinctly American, right? When you go to Europe, when you go to Asia, when you go anywhere and you ask a local, what do you think about Americans? Like what is a standout quality of Americans? A lot of them will say they're very friendly, they smile a lot, and they're loud.

okay, there are worse qualities generally that Americans could be described as, and they are described as them, racist, fat, right? All those things where those are reflective of we are such a young country, truly, like in the grand scheme of things, we are such a young country. When you think of cities like

Rome, Paris, London, Shanghai, all of these cities are centuries old. And by that, I mean like 1200s is around the time where we started to recognize it as the city that we know it as today. You know what I mean? Especially when you think of Rome or London as cities that were under the Roman Empire. Like as we went, I was in London recently, we went into a building that had been there since 1066 AD.

That shit does not exist in America. So it's hard to compare, you know, culturally speaking, the things that determine why there is a cultural practice. Like Ireland has such a deep, rich history that goes back so long. A language, you know, all these things. America doesn't really have that. And while we have distinct characteristics and features, I would

I wouldn't say that there's one universal American culture. Correct me if I'm wrong, right? I probably am wrong. But the beautiful thing about America is it's a melting pot of cultures from all over the world. It's the American dream, right? Anyone can come to America and become an American and whatever that means, freedom to do X, Y, and Z. But in that, especially with a history of slavery that is really not that far removed,

And arguably, you know, slavery still exists in America today in the prison system. Whole other conversation. This sort of context makes conversations like these around language specifically, to bring it back to language, very, very interesting to me because it was an attempt to Americanize but not fully let go of that culture. And so you're left with this cool half and half, you know, where you get capiche. And regionally, that's understood as...

The same or a similar meaning to... Non capisco. Non capisco. Non capisco in Italy. So it's very... I love stuff like that. Especially, I think, the biggest...

And coolest example in my eyes is the whole city of New Orleans or just Louisiana in general. So many different countries have colonized or, you know, put their flags into the state of Louisiana. And what comes from that is such an interesting blend of culture. When you walk down the street, you know, on Bourbon Street, that is not, while it's funny, you know, that people get drunk and

It's a drinking street, the same way Sixth Street is in Austin. Bourbon is actually from the Bourbon dynasty, which was the Spanish monarch, right? Yeah.

Bourbon dynasty or Spanish or French Bourbon, France. The house of Bourbon was a royal dynasty that ruled France, Spain, Naples, Sicily, and Parma. I'm so smart. They were one of the most important ruling dynasties in Europe. The Bourbon dynasty originated in France in the 16th century as a branch of the Capetian dynasty.

The dynasty's name comes from the Bourbon region of France. The Bourbons also ruled Navarre in Spain. So when you think of this, especially as cities and tourist destinations that we know today, this really isn't that long ago. You know what I mean? Like their rule in France ended in 1848. So...

When you talk about Bourbon Street, it's interesting because this is the French Bourbon dynasty, but it'll say Calle de Bourbon. Bourbon Street. It's in Spanish. I love that bullshit! I love that shit! History's all around you if you know where to look. History's everywhere if you just have a researcher's eye. Nuts. Yeah, I thought that was really, really interesting. Okay, so...

I had some stuff that I wanted to Google with you guys because what would a Broski Report episode be without me Googling shit that I don't know? And the first one, completely unrelated to anything, but I was just thinking about this last night. What do birds know when it's night-night time? How do birds know when it's time to go night-night? Like, they stop chirping.

And they rise with the early dawn. Now, I know that nature is wonderful and beautiful and magical and symmetrical and everything is for a purpose and everything exists in harmony and balance, right? Why do birds not chirp when time go night-night? Why don't birds sing at night? BirdBot. Should we hit birdbot.com? BirdForum. What time do birds go sleep and stop singing?

Welcome to Bird Forum, the internet's largest birding community with thousands of members from all over the world. The forums are dedicated to wild birds, birding, binoculars, and equipment, and all that goes with it. Hell fucking yeah!

Okay, this user writes, hello, I am from Poland. I need to record the sound of a stream in a forest. Since I need pure sound of falling water without birds in the background, I'd like to know what hour do birds stop singing? I do not want to go to a forest at night, so maybe birds stop singing in the evening when it's light. Thanks in advance for your answer. Now someone replied and said, it depends on the species. Duh, right? Hey, everyone knows that.

Some songbirds, especially during the breeding season, sing well into the night. Others, particularly hole nesters, generally, I'll show you a hole nester, generally stop singing long before dark. Most owls, of course, sing mainly at night. Okay, let's hit this AI overview. Most birds don't chirp at night because they get nervous. Most birds don't chirp at night because they have performance anxiety. Okay, that makes sense.

No, it's because they're primarily diurnal. What the fuck? Diurnal meaning. And how the fuck do you say that? Diurnal. Diurnal. I have diurnal about once a week. I have diurnal after I eat spicy food.

Speaking of which, I had some of the worst stomach cramps I've ever had in my fucking life about two nights ago. I mean, I was up at 4 a.m., heating pad on my stomach, took a Tylenol. I was doing breathing exercises. I couldn't stand up straight. I've never had that happen to me in my life. And what did I eat that night? Spicy chicken.

And when I had Googled it and I said, what the fuck's wrong with me? Why is my upper abdomen cramping? They said, well, it could be two things. One, you ate spicy food. Two, it's stomach cancer. And I said, well, time will tell. Luckily, I think I just had a diurnal. Okay. I had to go to the turtlet and have diurnal. That's two poop jokes so far.

We are young. Hey, there's a fire in our soul. We go big or go home together. And Kyle Gordon's going on tour and he's coming to LA. Yeah, you bet your fucking ass I'm going to that show. I wouldn't miss a Kyle Gordon show for the life of me. We are young. Hey, he's so fucking funny.

Diurnal. Of or during the day. Diurnal. Diurnal. Why don't birds sing at night? Because they are of or during the day. Meaning they are active during the day. Sometimes I think back to elementary school or whenever the fuck I was in class. And when teachers were like, don't ask me, ask a friend. I get it. Because that was as simple, if I would have just kept reading one more sentence, I would have answered my own question.

Instead of stopping every time I'm like, what dat mean? Just spit everywhere, by the way. What dat mean? I Google it. And then context clues are a beautiful thing. Don't ask me, ask a friend. Before you ask me, make sure you've asked two friends. They were serious about that shit too. And I get it. Oh my God, if I was a teacher, I would shoot my kids with water guns. Sorry, that sentence started way different than you probably thought it was going somewhere. I would shoot my kids with water guns.

If you raise your hand and ask me a stupid question, boom, water to the face. Okay? Now sit down, use your resources, and if you really can't figure it out, ask me again. Right? It's harmless. If you stand up, okay, what does diurnal mean? Because look it up. Ask a friend. Keep reading the sentence.

You know what one of my favorite parts of history class was? Was getting into... And this is when I realized, okay, learning can be fun. It's the fucking tea, girl. When the royals would fight or like any story of revolution. When I learned about the French Revolution, when we learned about the French Revolution, I was like, this is tea. Wait, hold on.

Wait, why did they low-key kind of eat? Why is it literally tea? Why is this Dramageddon part four? Okay, why is no one talking about the fact that the French Revolution was literally fucking tea? Um, no, Queen, that's actually going to be the American Revolution because they threw tea in the harbor. Like, sometimes I see a vision of my true self and she's floating somewhere up high and she is a vision of golden light.

Yet she is shackled by her wrists and her ankles to this version of me. She's trying to get away and she's shackled and weighed down by iron chains of this version of me. Where I'm sitting on this podcast like, Welcome to Revolution Loki T. We are young. Hey, there's a fire in our soul. A severe lemur.

This episode is sponsored by PDS Debt. Feeling buried under credit card bills, personal loans, or medical debt? It's like your money's working harder for your lenders than it is for you. But it doesn't have to be that way with PDS Debt.

PDS Debt does more than just help you manage your debt. They empower you to take control. Using their platform, they go beyond the numbers to understand your unique financial situation and craft a personalized plan designed just for you. No more cookie-cutter solutions. Just a clear path to financial freedom that fits your lifestyle.

And here's the best part. There's no minimum credit score required. Whether your credit is bad or fair, they're here to help you save more, pay off your debt faster, and start putting money back where it belongs, in your savings account.

I know debt impacts so many students leaving school or people who find themselves reliant on credit cards just to make it. I know how hard it can be, but getting started is easy. Go to pdsdebt.com slash broski to complete your free debt assessment to see what options are available to you.

Every day you wait, it's costing you money. Get started with your free debt analysis in just 30 seconds at pdsdebt.com slash broski. That's pdsdebt.com slash broski. Take back control today by visiting pdsdebt.com slash broski. This episode is sponsored by Shopify.

When you think about businesses that are selling through the roof, sure, you think about a great product, a cool brand, and brilliant marketing. But an often overlooked secret is actually the businesses behind the business, making selling, and for shoppers, buying, simple. For millions of businesses, that business is Shopify. Nobody does selling better than Shopify.

home of the number one checkout on the planet and the not-so-secret secret with shop pay that boosts conversions up to 50%, meaning way less carts go abandoned and way more sales on the books.

So if you're into growing your business, your commerce platform better be ready to sell wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling on the web, in your store, in their feed and everywhere in between. Businesses that sell more sell on Shopify. Upgrade your business and get the same checkout Allo uses.

Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash broski, all lowercase. Go to shopify.com slash broski to upgrade your selling today. Shopify.com slash broski. You guys are not paying attention. If you, everyone clap three times. Okay, and if you didn't clap, do it with me now. One, two, three. Pay attention. You've been slacking off. We're learning about why birds don't sing at night.

And say it with me, because they are diurnal. Diurnal. Because the Google pronunciation always says it so fucking sensual. Diurnal. Meaning they are active during the day and sleep at night. So their singing behavior is mostly concentrated around dawn and dusk when they are most active in searching for food and mates. However, a few species are nocturnal and will vocalize at night, like owls and whippoorwills. Now, I thought a whippoorwill was a tree.

Am I- Whip or Will? It's a bird! Oh, they're kinda cute. Eastern Whipperwill. Whip-por-will. Now why the fuck is it named that? Whipperwill got its name from The Mail's Familiar Call, a three-note series that sounds like it's wailing. Whipperwill. Oh. Global warming threatens the birds we love. Okay, this is from fucking Facebook. Okay, enough about that. I wanna look up... Is there a name...

For the English spoken by Italian immigrants. Whoa. Siculish? Siculish is the macaronic Sicilianization of English language terms and phrases by immigrants from Sicily to the U.S. in the early 20th century. The term Siculish, however, is rather recent, being first recorded in 2005.

Itangles, which is also known as Anglitaliano, or in the United Kingdom, Britallian, refers to multiple hybrid terms, hybrid types of language based on Italian and English. There are numerous portmanteau terms that have been used to describe and label this phenomenon. This is what the fuck I'm talking about. Now, portmanteau is also a great word. Portmanteau. Portmanteau. Portmanteau. Portmanteau.

A large trunk or suitcase? Or a word blending the sounds and combining the meanings of two others. For example, motel from motor and hotel. What? Or brunch from breakfast and lunch. Podcast is a portmanteau. A made-up word coined from a combination of the words iPod and broadcast. Away! iPod and broadcast.

Don't ever tell me you don't learn something from this podcast. Damn, is portmanteau a French word? Yes, the word portmanteau comes from the French words porter, to carry, and manteau, cloak. It originally referred to a suitcase with two compartments for carrying coats and other clothing. Is Netflix a portmanteau? Internet and flicks. Yes! Is ginormous a portmanteau? Yes, gigantic and enormous. Ginormous! Yes!

Turkey duck chicken, turducken, is cheeseburger a portmanteau? Burger can produce a word referring to seemingly any noun between two halves of a round bun. Bacon burger, black burger, turkey burger. In fact, it's so liberated from the original word hamburger that it's also a word in its own right. Is Velcro a portmanteau? Velcro was developed as a portmanteau of the French words velours, or velvet, and crochet, or hook. Oh, what...

This is crazy. This is absolutely crazy, bro. Okay, I wonder what it's called. What is Italian English called on the East Coast? Oh, just American Italian. While Italian English is widely used, there isn't a single universally accepted term for this dialect.

The specific Italian-influenced English spoke on the East Coast can vary depending on the region, with New York and New Jersey having notable differences. Linguists sometimes use the term ethnolect to describe a variety of English spoken by a specific ethnic group, which applies to Italian English. How cool. How capicola became gabagool, the Italian New Jersey accent explained. Mozzarella became something like mozzarella.

Ricotta became rigote. Prosciutto became prosciutto. There's a mangling of the language in an instantly identifiable way. I love this sh- My heart just started racing. I love this shit, dude! I need to go back to school.

Final syllables are deleted, certain consonants are swapped with others, certain vowels are mutated in certain places. Most immigrant groups in the U.S. retain certain words and phrases from the old language, even if the modern population can't speak it. But for people outside those groups, and even often inside them, it's next to impossible to pick out a specific regional accent in the way a Jewish American says chala or a Korean American says jjigae.

How can someone who doesn't speak the language possibly have a regional accent?

Yet Italian-Americans do. It's even been parodied. On an episode of Kroll Show, comedian Nick Kroll's character, Bobby Bottleservice, a Mike-the-situation Sorrentino type, describes his lunch in this thick accent, eliminating the final syllable of each item. Capicol, he says, pointing at capicola. Mortadella, he says, as the camera pans over a thin, pale arrangement of mortadella. Coca-col, he finishes, as the camera moves over to a glass of Coke.

Capicola, made famous in its mutation by the Sopranos, gets even more mutated for comedic effect on The Office, where it becomes Gabagool. Now, I did not know The Office had made Gabagool. I spoke to a few... Okay, this is also from AtlasObscura.com, which I fucking love Atlas Obscura. If you ever are visiting a new city and you want something weird or fun or silly to do, go to AtlasObscura.com. They'll give you the recommendations for, like, the best museums. I just realized how fast I'm speaking.

and how speaking any language is a feat of... Sorry, I'm like having an existential moment right now, if you guys don't mind. Like language and how fucking different language is anywhere you go. And you want to know something I learned in my sociology class way, way back when. I took it in a college summer course in like 2017.

One shared commonality amongst every single culture on this planet is not what you would think it is, which is, you know, language or sayings or phrases or metaphors. It's not that. It is funeral rites. In every single culture, we have a practice for how we honor the dead. Isn't that beautiful?

Okay, going back. Yeah, dude, this shit makes me like, I'm like up here looking down. Damn, the liquid IV is talking to me. Hold on, it's whispering to me. Hold on, I'm getting messages from the gods. One second. Okay, I'll tell them. I think that humans are divine creatures and at the same time, very of the earth.

My heart's beating 100, 175 beats per second. I think that humans are so intriguing and it makes it even more sad and barbaric that we are so violent towards each other, that we have so much hate in our hearts for each other. When like we serve a higher, not serve, but we are destined for, you know, a higher purpose of like,

achievement and progress. Like, the bounds of what the human mind can create, we won't know because we're too busy being racist. Anyway, I spoke to a few linguists and experts on Italian-American culture, anyway, gabagool, to figure out why a kid from Patterson, New Jersey, who doesn't speak Italian, would earnestly ask for a taste of mozzarella.

The answer takes us way back through history and deep into the completely chaotic world of Italian linguistics. One thing that I need to tell you, because this is something that is not clear even for linguists, let alone the layperson, the linguistic situation in Italy is quite complicated, says Maria Paola D'Imperio, a professor in the linguistics department at Aix-Marcel University, who was born in Naples and studied in Ohio before moving to France. Crazy.

The situation is so complicated that the terms used to describe pockets of language are not widely agreed upon. Some use language, some use dialect, some use accent, and some use variation. Linguists like to argue about the terminology of this kind of thing. The basic story is this.

Italy is a very young country made up of many very old kingdoms awkwardly stapled together to make a patchwork whole. Before 1861, these different kingdoms, Sardinia, Rome, Tuscany, Venice, Sicily, they were called different things at the time, but roughly correspond to those regions now.

Those were basically different countries. Its citizens didn't speak the same language, didn't identify as countrymen, sometimes were even at war with each other. The country was unified over the period from around 1861 until World War I, and during that period, the wealthier northern parts of the newly constructed Italy imposed unfair taxes and basically annexed the poorer southern parts.

As a result, Southern Italians, ranging from just south of Rome all the way down to Sicily, fled in huge numbers to other countries, including the United States. About 80% of Italian-Americans are of Southern Italian descent. That's crazy! About 80% of Italian-Americans are of Southern Italian descent, says Fred Gardafi, a professor of Italian-American studies at Queens College. Ships from Palermo went to New Orleans, and the ships from Genoa and Naples went to New York.

They spread from there, but the richest pockets of Italian Americans aren't far from New York City. They're clustered in New York City, Long Island, New Jersey, Rhode Island, Connecticut, and in and around Philadelphia. Yet those Italians, all from southern Italy and all recent immigrants in close proximity to each other in the U.S., wouldn't necessarily consider themselves countrymen. That's because each of the old Italian kingdoms had their own, well, d'imperio, who is Italian, calls them dialects. But

but others refer to them in different ways. Basically, the old Italian kingdoms each spoke their own languages that largely came from the same family tree, slightly, but not all that much closer than the Romance languages, French, Spanish, Portuguese. The general family name for these languages is Italo-Dalmatian. Dalmatian. It's probably not Dalmatian.

Dalmatian, it turns out, refers to Croatia. The dog is from there too. Dalmatians are from Croatia? Martin Hamza. Martin, Martin and Hamza. They were not all mutually comprehensible and had their own external influences. Calabrian, for example, is heavily influenced by Greek. Oh, they're shit! Just yelled so loud, it bounced off the metal in here. And it was like this, shit!

After I did that. Damn. Studying sociolinguistics off the liquid IV pineapple yuzu energy drink. When you start tweaking so bad, you start studying sociolinguistics.

Like, Calabrian, for example, is heavily influenced by Greek, thanks to a long Greek occupation and interchange. In the northwest, near the border with France, Piedmont, with its capital of Turin, spoke a language called Piedmontese, which is sort of French-ish.

Sicilian, very close to North Africa, had a lot of Arabic qualities to it. I use the past tense for these because these languages are dying quickly. Dialects do still exist, but they're spoken mainly by old people, says D'Imperio.

Sicilian put up more of a fight than most. During unification, the northern Italian powers decided that having a country that speaks about a dozen different languages would pose a bit of a challenge to their efforts, so they picked one and called it Standard Italian and made everyone learn it. The one that they picked was Tuscan, and they probably picked it because it was the language of Dante, the most famous Italian writer.

You can see why calling these languages dialects is tricky. Standard Italian is just one more dialect, not the base language, which Calabrian or Piedmontese riffs on, which is kind of the implication. That is nuts! Yeah, it really is that. I mean, English is English because some king was like, and now everybody's going to speak English. And I don't give a fuck, okay? And now, as of right now, everyone speaks English because that's what I speak. And everyone was like, fine.

Well, actually, they weren't like, oh, fine. It's either succumb or die. So. Standard Italian has variations like any other language, which we'll call accents. Someone from Sicily would have a Sicilian accent. But when speaking standard Italian, a person from Milan will hopefully be able to understand them because at a basic level, they'll be using a language with the same structure and a vocab that is mostly identical. Yeah, we know that.

But this gets weird, because most Italian Americans can trace their immigrant ancestors back to that time, between 1861 and World War I, when the vast majority of Italians, such as Italy even existed at the time, wouldn't have spoken the same language at all. And hardly any of them would be speaking the northern Italian dialect that would eventually become standard Italian. Linguists say that there are two trajectories for a language divorced from its place of origin. I need to...

linguistics studies near me. If I enroll myself in University of California, Long Beach to study linguistics and I can't do the podcast for like six months, you guys gonna be mad at me? My semester starts soon, okay? I can't keep up the podcast and study sociolinguistics. I'm gonna look into that. Do people even give a fuck about an associate's degree anymore? If I get an associate's degree in linguistics,

I think it's also, there are so many different ways you can study linguistics of like, obviously you can just learn a new language, which I remember this and I was like, what the fuck? When I was in college, one of my Spanish professors, who was a white dude from Ohio, spoke five languages. And he was, while he was teaching our Spanish phonetics class, he himself was studying, it was so cute. He'd be like, okay, guys, I'm not having office hours today. So just email me if you need them because I have to run to my Romanian class.

I need, I need to be, I need to speak to a gay person. I need to speak to a gay person. That's how I feel, but I need to speak to like a college professor. I need to speak to a professor. I need to speak to a professor. I can't do office hours. I'm running late to my Romanian class. He was probably like 56. I lie. Never stop learning. There is so, this life is so rich and fucking cool. There's so many cool things to do. And we're on TikTok all day.

Okay. Period.

I grew up speaking English and Italian dialects from my family's region of Puglia, says Gardaff. And when I went to Italy, very few people could understand me. So she grew up speaking English and Italian dialects from Puglia. Even the people in my parents' region, they recognized that I was speaking as if I was a 70-year-old man when I was only 26 years old.

Italian American Italian is not at all like standard Italian. Instead, it's a construction of the frozen shards left over from languages that don't even really exist in Italy anymore with minimal intervention from modern Italian. That is crazy! Y'all don't even give a fuck how crazy that is!

You know what? To sort of contextualize this sort of phenomenon in America, the Southern dialects are dying. Southern dialects are a direct, you can trace them back to the English settlers who came once the colonies were set up.

And there is a very clear connection between the sort of high society British received pronunciation to when you get down to the South. It's a little similar in terms of vowels and the lilt to it. It's a very clear... I'm about to say this word, but I don't mean it. It's...

de-evolution of the English language. Okay, I don't mean that in a negative sense, but more so just like this change. It was morphed and molded into something way different.

because of a similar thing like this, where all these different people from different backgrounds. And if you've been in America for longer at the time, and you're hearing that all day, you'll lose your accent. I mean, it happens to everyone, but there used to be this guy I followed on TikTok. And I wish I could remember his name where he was from Mississippi and

And he was probably 24. And he was raised by his grandparents. And so when you think about that, his grandparents were probably in their late 70s, early 80s. And that means they were born in the 40s and grew up in the 50s, 60s, and maybe even early 70s. Now, when you think about the deep South in America, an accent like that

And surely you would think is preserved. And there are still those small towns where everyone sounds like that. And it is true to a certain extent, but it's definitely dying out with our grandparents' generation. And it kind of makes me sad. But at the same time, there are so many fucking horrific worldviews that come with that accent. That's just like, okay. Yeah.

But he was saying that his accent and his grandparents' accents are classified as an endangered regional dialect. And it is in like historical – he did some work with some historical society in Mississippi. I believe it was Mississippi where –

He went in and like recorded some of just him speaking or reading certain lines. And it's to preserve that dialect, which is so fun and cool that we have that technology now. Because imagine, I mean, when you get those videos on TikTok or YouTube or whatever, like, this is what so-and-so sounded like in 1891. I love that shit. And it's so rare. And I don't know if it's, you know, to be trusted or not. I digress. Yeah.

But the fact that we have the forethought to do that now of like, we recognize that, first of all, small town America is dying. Everything is becoming big. And with the introduction of things like, you know, Amazon and all these things, the reliance on a community or a small town is dying. It's going away. And there are two sides of that, you know, where we're more connected than we've ever been.

And the other side of that is we do not rely on community at all. I mean, not even closely to the way that my grandparents did when they were growing up. So I've talked about that on this podcast before of like, you know, I don't know my neighbors, shit like that. Anyway, that accent, the fact that even in America...

one of the youngest countries, we have accents that are dying out. It's just very, it makes me sad, right? But at the same time, as those die out, new accents are evolving. And while it sounds funny, it's very real that this influencer accent is a real thing. And it's very closely tied to, you know, the Valley Girl accent, whatever, just the sort of West Coast thing, this West Coast development of the regional dialect. But

Yeah, I've seen some people on YouTube be like, what is the influencer accent? And like, let's study it in an academic setting. So how things are always happening. Things, people, always happening. Okay.

Now, how the fuck did I get on this when I was Googling, why don't birds sing at night? Like, are you serious? Okay, I'm going to pause and we'll come back next week. And I'm going to finish my Google searches. But in the meantime, I wanted to update y'all on, I started a new book that is, me and Drew are book clubbing. Thank you. Thank you. We're book clubbing this fucking Viking smut book. Yeah!

Yeah, dude. It's called from fucking Ash and... Until the dawn!

This episode is sponsored by Rocket Money. You sign up for something, you forget about it after the trial period ends, then you're charged month after month after month. The subscriptions are there, but you're not using them. In fact, I just learned that 85% of people have at least one paid subscription going unused each month. Thanks to Rocket Money, I can see all my subscriptions in one place and cancel the ones I'm not using anymore. And now I'm saving more money.

Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. See all your subscriptions in one place and know exactly where your money is going. For ones you don't want anymore, Rocket Money can help you cancel them.

Rocket Money's dashboard gives you a clear view of your expenses across all of your accounts. Easily create a personalized budget with custom categories to help keep your spending on track. See your monthly spending trends in each category to know exactly where your money's going. Get alerts if bills increase in price, there's unusual spending activity, or if you're close to going over budget.

The new goals feature automatically saves money for you. So you don't have to think about it. Pay off credit card debt, put away money for a house, or just build your savings. Rocket Money makes it easy.

Rocket Money will even try to negotiate lower bills for you. They automatically scan your bills to find opportunities to save. Then you can ask them to negotiate for you. They'll deal with customer service so you don't have to. Rocket Money has over 5 million users and has saved a total of $500 million in canceled subscriptions, saving members up to $740 a year when using all the app's premium features.

Y'all know I like to subscribe to games and then play it once and never play it again, and I keep paying for it month to month. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to rocketmoney.com slash broski report today. That's rocketmoney.com slash broski report. rocketmoney.com slash broski report. It's called A Fate Inked in Blood by Danielle L. Jensen.

It's a Viking book and it's not so, dude. Sometimes I get like bogged down by how much I don't know. Anyone else feel that way? Like I'm reading this book and she's talking about all these Norse gods and I did not know that Baldur, as in Baldur's Gate 3,

was a god. And it's making complete sense now that I'm thinking about it. Baldur was a god. We know the ones like Odin and Thor and Tyr and Hlynne and all these ones. I've heard those before. And is the majority of it through Marvel movies? Yeah, it is. Okay, I don't give a fuck. Or is it through God of War soundtrack? Yeah, it is. Ragnarok.

Anyway, it's shit like that where I know about it from references in pop culture, but it's this phenomenon where I only know about it through that. I'm not familiar with the original legend or tale or lore or mythology of the Norse mythology. It's more so I know only...

about it through pop culture references to it. You get me? You get where I'm going? So reading this book, which is clearly a fantasy book, it's, you know, a fiction, very interesting. And I was intrigued in the same way by when I read Red Rising, I

He had a super intense understanding, like an academic understanding, as you should, of all these Roman historical figures and military leaders and whatever, and all the gods as well. It was very clear that he did his research in terms of how the planets are named, how the Roman-esque society was structured, whatever. It's very clear in this one too. And again, maybe I'm speaking out of my ass because I don't know jack shit about Norse mythology, but I'm loving it.

I'm loving it so far. It's definitely giving like, I'm just a girl and I have this power and I need a man to help me realize the full extent of my power. Like it's that, you know? So it's a delicate balance now when I approach a fantasy book because I've read so fucking many where it's like,

I want that Aelin Galathineus throne of glass, like her and Rowan Whitethorn, their balance. I've never read anything like it. And you would think that, you know, Rhysand and Feyre from Ektar is that. No, it's a bit different because Aelin and Rowan, Rowan never, ever tried to impede or step on Aelin's freedom.

Ailyn made decisions for herself. Rowan respected all of those decisions. And it was never this like, you're a woman and I'm the man and I know you can do it, but I'm still going to protect you. Okay. Even if it's not what you wanted. Like, and that's the Tamlin of it all. Okay. Fuck all that. I fucking hate that dynamic.

The dynamic between Aelin and Rowan, to me, is the perfect, like, it's how a relationship should be, man. It's how a relationship should be. So reading these fantasy books is fun, but I'm already kind of calling out, like, the guy is kind of older than her.

she's the novice where like, I was just thrown into this and I have this power and these people have a use for my power. And he's the son of some like, you know, evil king, but he's good, but he's not that good. It's okay. Fine. Like, of course I'm going to finish it to the end and eat up every fucking page. Yeah. I'm going to read it. But in terms of dynamic, I just, Throne of Glass, that Throne, the Throne of Glass series is a series that just

Stuck with me. And on that note, I need to read Game of Thrones. Stanley's been up my fucking hole about reading Game of Thrones because it's like the book. It's the book. It's the fantasy series. So it's on my list. It's just like taking that on. It's so many fucking books. And Throne of Glass was eight books.

So it's not like I can't do it. It's not like I'm not interested. And it's also, you know, with Game of Thrones, you already have a jumping off point because of the show. Like I already have faces to, you know what I mean? It's on my infinitely to read list. Oh my God. I read 30 books last year. Crazy is that? I read 30 books. Go me. Go me, dude. Okay.

I think that'll pretty much do it for me this week. So, like, thanks for listening. Thanks for tuning in. You guys are seriously, like, so awesome. That's the influencer accent. Get ready with me to end the podcast today on the Broski Reports. If you want merch, go to broski.shop. Eyes peeled. Y'all don't even... Hold on. Can I just, like...

Let me brief you guys for a second. There are a few things happening later this month, and I mean in the next two weeks, that are going to, you are going to freak the fuck out in terms of what Broski Productions is pushing out into the universe, okay? You've been warned. Know that. That's all I'm going to say on that. If you want podcast merch, go to broski.shop.

And I'll leave you with that. And I will see you next week. Okay. Loving y'all. Be good. Be safe. Bye.

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time. Now through March 25th, spring in for storewide deals and earn four times a point. Look for in-store tags to earn on eligible snacks like Lay's chips, garden veggie straws, and planters nuts or sweet treats from M&M's and Oreo, plus many more. Then clip the offer in our app for automatic event-long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.