211 - Cody's Big News & Eli's New Show | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 211
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The NBA playoffs are here, and I'm getting my bets in on FanDuel. Talk to me, Chuck GPT. What do you know? All sorts of interesting stuff. Even Charles Barkley's greatest fear. Hey, nobody needs to know that. New customers bet $5 to get 200 in bonus bets if you win. FanDuel, America's number one sportsbook.

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on. You just throw a rock at his head and knock him out. They're just telling rednecks, go be pirates. What's that sword you guys carry called? Oh, no. Say hi to

Well, boys, it's just the gang again. I like it. Three, two, one.

I heard that. I heard that. And then the media put it back down. Hi, everyone. Welcome to the unsubscribed podcast with Eli Double Tap, fat electrician, Brandon Herrera, myself, donut operator. It's been a minute since we've done just the boys. It has. What's up? Beautiful faces. Nick's in town. Y'all are in town. Everyone at Cody, you have life updates. Everyone has updates. We got fucking engaged.

Yeah, dude. When's the last time we did a just a gang podcast like this? It's been a month and a half. A month, yeah. According to the internet, like a week ago, but. Yeah, a week ago. That's true. Hey guys, we're happy to have you here. We're lucky to be together. Always getting married. I am, I am. I got engaged at the Hotel del Coronado, Coronado Island, out there in San Diego. How was it?

It was good, dude. Someone's going to make an honest man out of me. I'm going to have a little Mexican babies running around, hopefully next year. I can't wait till your kids cut my grass. Yeah, dude. Okay, Mr. Herrera. Hey, look, I had to do it. It's a rite of passage. He cut my grass. My kids cut his grass. It's a whole give and take. Your kid's name, B, that's weird. That's weird, dude. Cut the yard, God damn it. John C. Sparrow.

Garrett. God! You don't have them yet. You can't say that. Thank you. It's fine. So you had a whole thing planned out and she didn't know about it. You even had a photographer there, right? Yeah, we brought a phoenix out who does beautiful strangers on Instagram. Why is Finn following us? Don't worry about it. Lazarus. No, don't expect anything. Just play it cool.

How'd it go though? It was good, man. Went out to the beach on the Hotel Del, right in front of the Hotel Del Coronado. And like I said, my friend Phoenix was out there and I was trying to distract her because she was looking at him. She was like, he looks familiar. And I was like, no, no, no, he doesn't look familiar. Look at that wave out there. That wave is crazy. There's surfers and stuff out there in the thing. And so Finn, or not Finn, excuse me. He's the photographer. Yeah, Phoenix, the photographer. He's like, that wave.

way, that way, that way, that way, that way. And so I'm like trying to distract her while I'm walking out there and I'm looking at him. You're doing the soy jack meme. Oh, look at that. That mountain out there looks cool, doesn't it?

I'm going to put this reflector right here. Just, oh, trash, you know? It's like getting the perfect light set up for one shot. Is that, he was doing all that for a single shot? Yeah. Yeah. What was funny is his disguise. When we FaceTimed later, he's like, he's wearing, I love Phoenix to death. He's like one of my favorite people. Very genuine, wholesome guy. Wearing this gay little hat that is just like, oh, this is my disguise. And Moody was like, that was the reason I identified him. You have the nose. Yeah.

no one knows who i am right well she recognized him because he had the fucking hat on he was like i wore it so she wouldn't recognize me but she was like look at that guy with the hat right there it's like no don't look at that guy don't look at that don't look at that guy if there was somebody wearing that hat on the beach that would be all i could look at it's like one of those like 1920s paperboy hats

Oh, my God. I need to look at this hat. Oh, like the uncircumcised hats? Like the Peaky Blinders. Yeah, with the foreskin over the bell. If somebody was wearing that on the beach at Hotel Del Coronado, that would be the only thing I was looking at. He even sewed the razors into the hat, too. It was weird, man. He cut a homeless guy. Yeah, he killed a homeless man while we were on the beach. My name's Eagle.

Geneva. He did yell at some people, by the way. To get out of the way of the photos? Because we were walking down there and we've been planning this all morning and he was walking down there and like some people stepped in the shot and as we're walking down, I can see him screaming at people. He's like, get the fuck out of the way. Will you marry me? Fucking move! Move, bitch! It's like, whoa, okay.

Good time. Good time, Zoe. Who's that guy in the funny hat yelling at people and threatening? Baby, don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. And then she said yes, obviously. Yeah, yeah. Well, she didn't say yes. She hugged my head. And cried? Yeah, and cried a little bit. Did you cry? Yeah, out of my penis. Any romance, go on. I cried out of my penis. Also, his mother. I just bring up her to the room. I know. I got to hold back the jokes now. Oh, God.

Let's get it out of the way. Now she knows you've had sex. It's going to be a good episode today. Tonight's going to be rough for the second one. Oh, just like fucking Nashville.

Like the Nashville live show where we did two shows in one night. The first show was like, all right, got the nerves out. And then the second show, we were just belligerent. Everyone loved it the entire time. It was a good time. It was a rough, rough fucking time. Two shows in a row. Hey, if anybody's carrying a gun in here, show it to us now. Oh, that's the one that was super weird and they thought we had guns.

Yeah, that was when they were scared of us. One fan walks up with an empty tube and everybody freaks out. AT-4s do look like rocket launchers. They are rocket launchers. If you don't know better, I'd be like...

Well, the manager of the show, we've talked about this before on the podcast. The manager of the show came back and he's like, the staff is really scared of you guys. I was like, why? Someone brought a rocket launcher into the theater. It doesn't work. It's fine. It's not a real rocket launcher. We're all carrying. It's good. They'll protect you. I promise that. Yeah, this would be the worst place for somebody to try something.

Have a beef fuck around, find out. Most of the audience is like prior service of some capacity. There's probably a couple guns in the room. There's a couple guns. It's going to be like a zombie movie. They just like slowly rip the criminal apart. I guarantee it would just be a horde. What was it?

Atlanta? No, it was San Diego. Hannah got too high off that edible. And after the show, she was freaking out. We let her talk about that? She ate far too much of an edible that she should not have eaten. From a stranger? No, it was from her brother. From a dispensary. But it was like, this is 100 milligrams. Have one square. It's not working after 10 minutes. I'm going to eat the whole thing. Type of a situation. 100 milligrams. On fucking Pluto by the time the show gets done. She's

freaking out she's walking extraordinarily well five milligrams is like we'll fucking send you to the moon so a hundred milligrams you are you have seen god you talk to him you go back you you're you're living like she's like having a panic attack and she's like i don't want you doing live shows anymore out of all those people they're looking at you it's so scary what if one person there wanted to kill you blah blah blah i was like sweetheart

If somebody was gonna kill me and they did it at my live show, my last moments would be getting to watch the 2499 other people literally rip them into pieces. It'd be so hilarious. It's literally a zombie movie. Arms and limbs flying about and getting ripped open. Why are they eating him? Everybody goes home with a piece of fuckhead. It's disgusting.

She was a champ, though. She was a champ. She had the time of her life. I just remember walking up in her eyes like this. Getting the DoorDash dude for Papa Murphy's that I had to call at 2 a.m. after the show to get her food was pissed because we had to get food to Coronado across the island.

DoorDash drivers love driving pizza across that big-ass bridge. He messaged me. He's like, hey, man, just so you know, this is going to be like 25 minutes of my fucking life driving across this bridge. I was like, I'll take care of your tip. Don't worry about it. Mobile ad. Mobile ad. It's an interesting bridge. I don't think it's that crazy, though. What? Like...

It's not that big of a... It's a big bridge, but it takes fucking two minutes to go over. If you're doing DoorDash, you get a drive. It's kind of out there compared to where everything else is. You know what I mean? If you're just delivering drunk people food at one in the morning, running from Taco Bell to houses and back. Well, don't they account for that, though? What? Distance?

I have no idea. Distance. Sometimes I think, but still it's at the whim. It could be probably like if there's any tolls for that. It was drunk and it was 2 a.m. I don't care. I'll give him a big dip. It's fine. You got stuck on the tarmac. I want to hear that. I know you were probably human. There's no story. The plane showed up 30 minutes early and they're like, oh, well, the plane in front of you showed up late. So they just pulled in. So now we have to sit here and sit on the plane for another hour.

do nothing the entire time. That was it? Yeah, pretty straightforward standard airplane bullshit. Because, you know, like the AC on planes doesn't really work when they're on the ground. Or when I'm fat. So I'm just imagining... Well, that was my next part. I'm just imagining sitting next to you on the ground, on the tarmac, just waiting.

It's true. And just getting my left side of my arm progressively more moist. You're just breathing heavily. I'm sitting next to some kid that got upgraded. He was coming out here to see his sister graduate to be a Navy corpsman. So he was cool the entire time, which is unfortunate because I love when I end up sitting in first class and it's just some snooty bitch that's mad that I exist the entire time. It's hilarious. Well, this guy win a contest or something?

that's the look you get every time. And I love it. My favorite part is like going out with our crowd. You get a bunch of just tattooed guys and t-shirts and, you know, wearing camo shit. You go to like a nice steakhouse and just the looks that we get. Do you remember that one time they stopped us from going to the bathroom? They escorted us. It was fucking wild. The, the servers, it was like a pretty, pretty nice steak joint, but it was like a couple of years ago. It was in San Antonio. Uh,

We like, I think it was Batty, like me, Batty, you and Cody were going to the bathroom. I think it was like a party or something. Yeah, we had a bunch of people out there. But we were going to get up, we were getting up to go to the bathroom and they thought we were dying and dashing. So the servers formed a wall, a human wall in front of the front door. Yeah, they were like, follow us and then escort us to the bathroom because we couldn't find it, obviously. Yeah.

Like the implication was they thought we were going to sprint out on the ball. I thought you guys wanted to play Red Rover. You just run out the line. Oh, I win. Okay, where's the restroom at? I was like, what the fuck?

Like now I want to do it out of principle. So when, uh, last time I was here, I brought my dad down and I bought him a first class plane ticket. Cause he'd never sat first class. And it's like a six in the morning flight. We're headed back to Iowa. Oh no. And my dad is probably still drunk from the night before. And the dude sitting next to him is just like,

overly aggressively nice business suit with like this big ass fancy Breitling watch on like all this bullshit and he's just visibly mad that my dad is sitting next to him in a fat electrician shirt and

And my dad just leans into it. My dad drank like fucking six Jack and Cokes at 6 a.m. on his flight next to this guy. Hell yeah. Just furious the whole time. My dad's sitting there eating beef jerky, drinking Jack and Coke. Because if you guys don't know, in first class, they'll just feed you drinks and it's free. Right at the beginning, too, before you take off. Yeah, they'll say, what do you want to drink before we take off? And they'll just feed you a drink. Yeah. So dad's just going ham. Dude, my dad's like, I don't want to cost you any more money. I was like, dad,

It's free. Tricks in first class are free. He goes, fuck! Literally, like, he... I'll pay your check and coke. Do you want a double? Yes. He's trying to be respectful and immediately free. That would be disrespectful to not drink as much as possible since you already paid for it. It's like an all-inclusive resort for him now. He's like, oh, fuck. I've never been cut off on a plane before. Cody? No. No.

I think Cody's almost got cut off from a flight before. Weren't we on a flight one time where the lady was like, you've had too much to drink. We've only had two drinks and we hadn't been drinking all day. I don't think I was there for that. I think that was the one where you were in California, but I don't remember. Yeah, I had one lady come up and I think we just had differing political views. Might have been wearing a shirt or something that she didn't like. And

Came up and was like, you're cut off. I'm like, ma'am, respectfully, I'm in first class. I haven't drank today and I just want to drink. She's like, no, you're cut off and like wouldn't let me drink. Yeah, it was weird. Weird stuff. What was the, it was one of the live shows. Cause I remember Rich was there and the one stewardess was just like,

literally not even bringing drinks anymore just giving out the miniature bottles like she would do like four of them in her fist just to set up on your tray in front of you i was like what is happening yeah so sometimes you get like the really nice ones and then sometimes you get the ones that are like no no more

It's weird, dude. It's just like a coin toss anytime you fly. That's the general rule of life, though. If you're just sweet to people, there's no reason to be an asshole. Just be nice. Befriend the people. You get better service. Everybody has a better time. It's a win-win. Don't be an asshole. But sometimes you get those...

They want to be a dick. Yeah, yeah. And, like, anytime we fly, we don't act up. We're not loud. We don't fight with other passengers. Like, we're the nicest people ever. We've occasionally been kind of loud. Okay. We did have the lady on one of the live tours come up, and she's like, you guys are in a band or something, right? You remember her? Yep.

I remember the first one. No, I remember that one. What's the one where you get there's no assigned seating? Is that Southwest? Yeah. I remember the first tour we were going on. I don't remember the venue, but we do this cute thing. Well, Cody and Brandon do this cute thing where they don't board the plane until they're calling your name over the loudspeakers because you're at the bar.

We made it. I participated in that as well, but because it's Southwest, the only thing left is fucking middle seats. So I'm walking down the middle seat and I see two like

smaller women and I'm sitting between the two smaller women because I'm fat and that's the most room that makes sense like Tetris and I go excuse me can I sit behind you and Cody behind me goes ha you gotta sit next to the fucking fat guy the whole plane gets dead ass quiet and we don't know that we know each other that's some of my favorite shit is when the plane has no clue we're all tight

the hijinks you can get do you remember that one where it was this most recent live tour because we were all flying somewhere but it was all first class like all the hosts were first class and Rich was being fucking rich oh when you walked it was it the one where it was like oh my god is that your youtuber we always fuck with each other too yeah we fuck with each other all the time we're never loud I'm like we have the propensity to be quite loud uh

was that the one who was like or were you fucking with who was it when they like brandon walked around i know rich did that to me at least once but i think we've done it to everybody at some point yep and they're just like egging it on with the stewardess it's like oh no you really should ask like seriously he's a somebody oh and it goes that's what it was you research you and then you guys joined it's like holy shit it's bad electrician just going towards fat electrician the youtube star dude i don't

I don't think it was last time. I don't remember where the flight was. It was recent. It might have been for the drive tanks thing or the time before. One of the two. I'm in like the third or fourth row back. The dude in the very front row, so it's just like the wall with the TV screen in front of him. I sit down. He's three seats in front of me and on his screen he just has his phone sitting on top of the TV. He's watching his phone.

I'm not like paying attention to it. And the two women in front of me are like snickering back and forth and then pointing at me and looking and I like take my headphones off. I was like, yeah. And she's like, is that you? And the dude is watching one of my videos at the front of the screen. I was like, Oh yeah. Yeah. That's, that's me.

It was something. That's wild. I had that in San Fran where I was doing the speaking engagement for Young Americans for Liberty. And I was at the bar waiting for my flight. And I look over and the guy next to me, literally from me to you, the guy next to me is watching your video. And I'm just like, I'm not going to say anything. Yeah.

Just drink and move on. There was one... I always love that where you're making fun of somebody or you're one of our friends for being famous or whatever. But the fucking earlier at the brunch place, we're like... We had a couple drinks and we were just like, all right, we got to bail out because we got to go work. And the waitress is just like, oh, work? Now you're going to go work? What do you guys do? Connor. Are you talking about Connor? Yeah, Connor says. What do you do for work? He's like, I'm

bludgeon puppies to death with a hammer. Without skipping a beat. And then I go, and Nordstrom Rack. And Nordstrom Rack. The girl's face. You weren't there for that. She goes, oh, oh. Connor kept it going. He's like, yeah, that's what we do. It relieves stress after Nordstrom Rack. What? What?

Damn, Connor, you couldn't just say YouTube or something? Brandon got recognized. It was like Brandon Gonzalez. That was hilarious. Just the wrong Mexican last name. My favorite part, he's like, oh yeah, no, I voted for you. And I was like, I hope you didn't vote Gonzalez because that was the wrong fucking guy.

Brandon, is that you? Brandon, is that you? Brandon's like, yeah. He's like, Brandon Gonzalez walks up and shakes his head. It was funny. Sorry, he didn't say puppies. He said grown dogs. We'd be dogs to death with hammers. Why do you start at the tail? It was a hard shift at Nordstrom Rack. Yeah, it was a hard shift at Nordstrom Rack.

Holy shit. He's like, God damn it. And then I rolled through a stop sign in my gated community and the cop followed me here. Subtle flex, but all right.

It's a gay community. I don't think about stop signs anymore. My wife grew up in a town without stop signs. You got one in your gated community? That's exactly wrong. He followed you here, though. I saw his car catty-cornered into our little driveway there. He was really trying to get you. I had no idea. I was like, oh, he's following me. Cool. I just assumed it was ice. Same. Yeah.

Fuck, they got me. Rolled up, pulled in. He followed all the way to the house to get out. And he's like, hey, you, Eli. I was like, what's up, man? He's like, oh, never mind. I was like, oh, hey, blah, blah. She's saying, thank you for what you're doing. I was like, oh, the guys, you want to meet him? He's like, can I? I was like, yeah, come on. And immediately everyone's like, oh, what's up? We had a Bexar County deputy that was just like in the fucking podcast. We did have a sheriff's deputy just walk in here and take pictures with us. He was rad.

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I like Connor walked out in his bathing suit and then walked away immediately. He's just in shorts. While listening to music on a cassette player. I didn't know we were a cassette team company. I didn't either. Picture Connor just wearing his shorty shorts outside sunbathing and walking in and there's a cop there and he's still got his fucking tape player in his hand. Connor's just...

Do faults back to like base stat base settings. I don't talk to cops Are you showing the class your tape player that you have you got a fucking walk people music? That's not that first Sutherland that's Jeff You're just watching one of your money gets ripped up in the sky, huh?

Beep boop beep boop.

We got everyone in the MGS5 right now. Oh, Jesus, dude. Thanks for getting my son addicted to drugs again. Like, fuck, dude. And MGS5. And MGS5. Yeah, dude, it was heroin. Now you guys got him on fucking Metal Gear 5. We watched him for a night. He came over, hung out, and then just had the... He just watched play. John's boofing the Konami fence. Yeah.

He made him buy it. Brandon's fucking killing it. And Connor just started playing it. Just everyone's playing that game. That's like all my spare time at night is fucking MGS five. Cody, do you want better sex? I love better sex.

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well that's just what that's like 10 years old now right is me to play league of legends and listen to war documentaries like adults i wish i could but i've had the man who sold the world by david bowie stuck in my head for the last seven days i don't know what to do such a good song it is a great song i was listening to it on the way here i oh that's on my like my playlist and then in the game you know how you can play the cassette yeah and you

I'm starting to do that now. I didn't realize you could do that during missions. That's all I do. You just turn on your iPod. It's like baby driver. It is. It's all 80s shit too. It's all fucking good. Like the final countdown by Europe and like shit like that. Billy Idol, fucking Rebel Yell. You get in your vehicle, just run people over. Trank them, steal them. Well, John started asking me about the lore of the, when you kidnap someone, he was kidnapping puppies too. You tie them to the balloon. Oh, yep. He was like,

He was like, oh, this is all fake, right? I was like, no, the CIA actually attached people to balloons and a C-130 would come by and pick them up with a hook back in the day. He was like, wait, that's real? Yeah, the CIA did that shit back in the day, buddy. It's fucking wild. They experimented with a bunch of it, right? For like rapid extraction? Uh-huh. That had to kill a few people. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I mean, I don't think that ever is going from zero to 700 miles an hour immediately. Yeah, I would assume so. Yeah, you gotta break a few eggs, man. A real stretchy bungee for that. Yeah, dude, make an omelet, break a few eggs. Dude, I would not want to be testing that one. That's like prisoners get tested first. We'll reduce your sentence. Just test this out for us. First one died. Was that Skyhook? Or what was that? Skyhook. Okay. Yeah.

Batman did it in a dark night, right? Through that little Asian man out the window. You could have just had an Asian guy. Yeah. Take it, bitch.

Oh, man. I want to talk about John's lore this summer, Nick. Oh, boy. What? John's going to be going to camp with Nick for a couple weeks this summer. Send to Iowa. Two, three weeks. Forget. Yeah. What was it? Send to Dagestan. Two, three years. Forget. Dagestan. Two years. Wait. Okay. What's going on? John's going to come do jujitsu and learn how to sell t-shirts.

Yeah, John's going to live with him for two or three weeks and they're going to sell t-shirts and do jujitsu. Yeah. He's going to camp. Like the shirts made here? Yeah. No, John's making the shirts. I know. John's like weaving. He's like quite dark. Okay. Oh, that's interesting. Okay, that's why you brought it up when we were talking about Asian guy. Yeah. Like straight suffering. That's what I'm talking about. He's going to go with Nick. He's going to learn how to suffer and weave t-shirts, quack bang t-shirts on his own.

That's going to be good. When do you get them? Whenever Summer starts. Yeah, whenever he wants, really. I love this. I can roll now, so we're good. Yeah. He's going to be selling all your t-shirts. It's like the fucking Dave Chappelle bit. Like, I got a whole ass sweatshop down there. No, it just means Cody's going to start selling some merch for once. Damn! God damn. Ow. Jesus. Taking poison. My heart and my soul. Taking poison damage. One, one, one. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow

He's going to come back a little monster. I hope so. He's big enough, kid. He's about your size now, man. He is not 260 pounds. Yeah, I know. You know what? He's getting there. He's bigger than me. I don't know. He'd beat Connor. My son's, but...

I love you. Don't set me up to hurt you like that. We were at Topgolf the other day. Fucking John and Connor were getting into it, just like shit-talking each other. He's like, am I going to have to fucking fight a 16-year-old? And I'm like, I would recommend striking because I'm not confident about your odds if he hits you on the ground. Well, I mean, sometimes, you know, we'll be at the house. We'll have a couple drinks and be like, all right, fight John. And Tom says, fucking animal.

Not compared to Nick, but... Just bring out the rancor. Yeah, John has some ground game on him. So I'm excited to send him to Nick's place for a couple weeks just to have some fun. Eat some corn. Fuck every time Cody comes down from his room with John on a leash. It's like Hopper, the crazy grasshopper from A Bug's Life. Tore him away from his anime to beat up your friends. Every fucking time we get drunk...

Having a child is basically like having a Pokemon, essentially. Watch it fight people. John, use claw attack. John, use claw attack. The sooner you beat up Uncle Connor, the sooner you can get back to your hentai. John, get back. He'd just throw a rock at his head and knock him out. That's

painted red and white with a circle on it. John, use boulder. John, use 9mm. Just throw a gun next to him. Oh God, he's learning from my cop tape. John, throw an unregistered firearm near him. Oh God.

John uses unregistered firearms. The drop screwdriver. Did you see that meme that went viral on X last week? Which one? It was a listing for a gun. It was on like Gun Broker or whatever, some gun auction website. But it was a, what's it called where like the police department's selling it off? Yeah, it's a evidence locker gun. Oh, yeah. So it was a high point, but it didn't say evidence locker. It said like,

former cop carry gun or something and it was a high point and some like a drop gun some army dude commented and he's like at first i was wondering why the cops would have a high point yeeter and then i remembered why we carried a pkm when i was in the army that post went viral why is that nick

are there any buybacks coming up soon we've already done a couple of new year and that one ever so i was talking to my boy uh big shout out to uh west riddell i was talking to him apparently on monday they've got some that got sent to me today by my other buddies i've never seen it before i saw i've seen that that's so good they should make it they should invent a gun that doesn't whisper stuff to you that's a connor gun right there dude

But my boy Wes was telling me that they've got a bunch of gun bills that they're voting on in Texas in a couple days, and one of them is basically bans state-sponsored gun buybacks. Good. Because they don't fucking do anything. Although it's going to hurt my content. Yeah, it's fun to go to those. Me and Eli have seen coming with you to those things. Fuck you, Shaq. Why didn't you show up, dog? Where's Shaq? It was your gun buyback. I...

bought and built out the gaudiest deer hunting rifle for Iowa this year. It's hilarious. What'd you do, Nick? Marlin, the lever action company, came out with a Magpul edition. So it's a Magpul stock, Magpul M-LOK front grip.

on a stainless steel lever action 4570 and it's a trapper edition so the whole gun is only like this big because i always got those uh one of those states that has like the gay hunting law yeah so it's got iowa's so flat you have to hunt with straight wall cartridge so like you can't hunt with any high-powered rifles yeah so it used to be shotgun only forever i love the idea like you can't hunt with a high power rifle so instead i'm using a 4570 government

I mean, the logic is the 4570 is like, it's hitting the dirt after 300 yards. It's a bison killer. I'm like, yeah. So I have that gun with a fucking can on it because they just legalized suppressed hunting in Iowa and a fucking ACOG. Oh, yeah. You're going to just die. That's all we need. You want to know why you've never seen a buffalo in the wild? 4570 government.

Colorado just came out with their bullshit this morning. They finally signed that bill, right? Yeah. Yeah. Detachable magazine on rifles. It was a super restrictive gun bills. I know we were fighting it for a while. Oh, that's also, it's like California's legislation. I think it's worse. Yeah. In a couple of ways, it's kind of worse. Everyone was happy and clapping. They're like, no, yay. No more detachable magazines.

Crime will go down. Crime's going to drop now. We can't wait to see how this works. It's almost like we've seen it before and that doesn't have any correlation to crime whatsoever. Fucking wild.

There was the video where it was basically a bunch of people that were testifying in front of the state legislature, like, please don't take my constitutional rights away from me. This is illegal. You shouldn't be doing this. And it was the state legislator that was drawing on her iPad. She was doing like a coloring book. That's the one I see. It was multiple people watching videos, doing anything but paying attention. Yeah. Fuck you.

All right, guys. Something, something. Never mind. I got to ask you. Chicago crime in 2025. How many people have been shot in Chicago this year? 1,200. April? 2,500. 1,200. 3,000. 402 people have been shot in Chicago this year. Man, that's down. 104. Yeah. 104 homicides. In one city. The strictest gun laws in the country. That is...

i tried having that argument with somebody and they were like well yeah but the only reason they have that is because in indiana the gun laws are so relaxed that people from chicago just drive to indiana and buy guns and then do violent gun crime and i go cool so then why isn't indiana as dangerous as chicago hmm well okay well those factors what's the other factors involved like i've been told that socioeconomic

What is registered gun violence versus non-registered? Do you ever have any bad habits? Yeah, I've had bad habits. What are we doing it now? Yeah. Okay. If you're part of the 50% of people who try to quit vaping each year, well, you're going to have to equip yourself with the right tools for the job. Right, Cody? Is it fume? Eli, can you tell me about fume? Well, one thing is it has zero nicotine. You can fidget with it. Give it to me. Let me fidget. Fidget.

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Code on sub! Head over there now. I did read a statistic about that the other day. Basically, well, it was something along the lines of guns used in crimes that have been caught. Like, recovered guns from crimes. There's a wild, like, it's a wildly high percentage of those that are stolen. That's what I was going to say. It has to be a very high percentage on that. And you're like, okay. Yeah, a lot of people steal guns specifically just for crime. Weird. Yeah, crazy. Believe me.

When I dip my toe into crime, I'll definitely be using the guns that I bought myself at the store. I definitely won't be acquiring sketchy guns to do bad things with. Also, hunting with a suppressor was illegal? Yes. What's the logic on that? People are retarded.

The people that make the laws about guns don't understand guns. Oh, yeah. 100%. They watch movies. Do we need to get in a whole conversation on why democracy sucks? Is that where this is going? The video of the Indian guy, it's like, a democracy of the people, by the people, for the people. But the people are retarded. Yeah, exactly. Brandon, you have more ATS stuff coming up.

Or is it just focusing on that bill and then whatever else you're rolling out? Because you were up there last week in Austin doing some stuff too. You're going the whole government route again, aren't you? Well, that was like the term limit stuff. We were working on some of that stuff up there. But I am friends with a couple of the state reps who are just doing really base shit right now, which like any support I can give for that is awesome. I just like being able to do stuff. There's a lot of people that talk about doing stuff. I like to at least be useful for something.

But yeah, well, I was going to be talking about some of the ATF stuff that they're rolling back because Cash is out now. Cash is no longer ATF head. It's the guy who is military, right? Dorsey, Secretary of the Army. He was also a, I think he was a Republican lawmaker from North Carolina. But he...

He's pretty decent. They also fired the deputy director of the ATF, who's a total shithead. He was the guy who was responsible for the arm brace stuff. He had medals and shit from his service at Waco. Had been in the ATF for 35 fucking years and was just bragging about all the unconstitutional stuff they've been able to do. That guy should have been fired day one. Should be in jail. You'd be in jail.

Army Secretary Daniel. No shit. Army Sec. I don't really have a line of comms with him yet, but I am cautiously optimistic. Sounds like he's got a good track record. Just learn guns. Just have people that know it. The wait time for SBRs and suppressors is still really low. It'd be cool if there wasn't a wait time. I know something about that.

the the reason why do you know why the wait time shot to zero basically because they know they're about to lose the ability to have tax stamps so they're trying to green light and collect as much money as possible if i had to guess it's actually way more insidious than that okay so it was like kind of like why did the trains in germany run on you know kind of like that what they were trying to do is they were expecting uh this is from what i've what i've heard you know inside and out

They were expecting the arm brace thing to pass or, like, to be, like, confirmed by the courts and shit like that. Basically, if you had an arm brace or whatever, like, you would have to have registered that as an NFA item, like, as an SBR. So they built a huge infrastructure system because they were expecting millions of people to be registering their arm brace pistols and shit like that because they were going to make it a felony. Oh, okay.

And so literally they were that time they sold tens, if not hundreds of millions to firearms, to random everyday citizens and sporting goods stores and then decided it was illegal and they needed to give them money to be able to keep shit they bought legally where they were literally going to turn millions of law, otherwise law abiding Americans into felons overnight because of an arbitrary ruling. Yeah, that was the exact time.

Dope. But they built the infrastructure because they were basically going to be pointing a gun at the average American gun owner and saying, register it or it's 10 years in prison and a $250,000 fine. Per, right? Per infraction. That's the terrifying. It's per infraction. So, yeah, that's why NFA wait times accidentally went through the floor because that shit got disposed of. Good. So...

The reason why it happened wasn't super cool, but I'm glad it did. When are we going to get like a huge anti-gun guy on the podcast so me and Brandon, everybody can just rip them apart? Just actually hear their side. I think a lot of people are scared of us, to be completely honest, man. I've tried to invite people on the podcast. They're like, no, no. We have invited people with like somewhat conflicting views, and they just

We've even invited some of those people to range day. Yeah. It was like, Hey, come out and like, seriously, like no strings attached and come out and see what the culture is actually like. Uh, instead of, you know, your, whatever you think it is up here. Preconceived notion. It's like the guy that you'll get along surprisingly with everyone. You'll see. We're not, everyone's just good dudes. Everybody's polite when everybody's got a gun. Well, like we, like I thought we might've talked about it before. We had some people, uh,

Come out to the, like one of the last range days that we did who works for some platforms that we work with. And they're like, we thought you guys were going to be unsafe rednecks.

It's like, no, we like, this is the most safe environment to shoot a machine gun ever. Cause they won't say it openly, but then you call them on it. Like you thought we were a bunch of dumb hicks, didn't you? And they're just like, if you, if anyone fucks around stupidly with a gun, we will be the first ones to punch them in the mouth for being unsafe. You get your ass beat. Yeah. So, um,

You just get chucked to the ground instantly and then kicked out. I guarantee it. Yeah, dude. And we, we like at our range days, we have the, the, our RSOs are special forces dudes. And then we have the sheriff's department standing by also. So like if you're unsafe, yeah, we're like, Hey, drag that person out of here right now. They're not welcome ever again. Yeah. We had a bunch of active duty flight paramedics and shit like that. Like we, we had, you know, we got infrastructure there to do it as safe as we possibly can, you know, even for the worst case scenario.

But, you know, we're just a bunch of dumb hicks. What do we know? Dumb hicks that like shooting machine guns and stuff. One of my shooting gloves have those hard knuckle pieces so it doesn't hurt when I drag them on the ground like a fucking idiot 24-7. Smooth brain. Nick Horngy. Oh, God. Nick Horngy. You, um...

Met a dude I didn't know. So any military story, any of the World War I, World War II heroes, any story on an individual, it's all in the congressional library. You can get them documented or digitized and then put it in to always live on there. And then family members can just type in their name, pull it up. Older dude, he was in the military. Then he did something with the secretary of defense or he was a doctor guy. Very old, him and his wife. Sweethearts.

He had a story. I was like, I tried to Google the guy. I'll get his direct name. Kid joined at 12 years old. This is World War II. Joined, forged. He had a hobo forged documents for him. Signature. Like back in their days right here. Yeah. That time period. And it was like, oh, so hobo. How old are you? I think I'm 16. Brought the hobo. Oh, okay. To the recruiter. Hobo's like, yep, my kid's 18 or 16. Whatever the signing age to sign him on. He's like, yep, go. Boom. 12 years old. He is a sergeant.

15 years old jumping out of airplane. He did Battle of Bulge and something else. So he's a Sarn already. And then they go...

and then kick him out of the military because like you lied about your age they found out he's 15 finally i think it was his mom his mom wrote a letter to him because he finally wrote and then she wrote a letter to the army it was like hey my kid is joined at 12 he's 15 right now uh can i have him back so then he has to go back to high school he does high school for a couple years then goes back dude that's what happened to jack lucas

No shit. I don't know that one. The dude that won the Medal of Honor, I did a whole video on him. So he didn't watch- Way to watch his content, Eli. His dad or his stepdad was like a used car salesman that just wanted to get him out of the fucking way. And he's like, I want to join the army. So his stepdad, the used car salesman, comes in and is like, smooth talks the recruiter, convinces him that no, he is 17 or 18. Whatever the fuck the age limit was when he was like 15.

So he ends up joining the army. He's at, I think it was Iwo Jima, and he fucking jumps on a live grenade and then grabs another live grenade and pulls it under him. Both grenades blow up. Somehow he fucking survives. He ends up getting the Medal of Honor, and then he has to go back to high school because they found out he wasn't old enough. So homie was rolling up to high school. The most decorated war hero. With a fucking Medal of Honor to finish high school.

Like, how would you say to these kids? It's like a fucking 15 year old going to high school or like that. It's like, yeah, I took two grenades. What do you do? It reminds me of, uh, that movie, like catch me if you can. Like, uh, the, the Frank, uh, Frank Abagnale. Yeah. Abagnale. Frank Abagnale. Yeah. Like, he'd just cheat, like, uh, at a young age, he was just lying or when he did the, um,

When he pretended to be the substitute teacher. He was a substitute teacher, the fucking airline pilot. Like he pretended to be a doctor, like all sorts of shit. But have you heard the controversy about that since there's like the, there's actual controversy that apparently they're saying that like,

half of his story was made up which is hilarious because he was a con man that's like he supposedly passed the bar exam too in the movie that's what they said but like there's some controversy about like they're like some of the dates that you gave us for this you were in jail when that allegedly happened it's hilarious that the story about like one of the greatest like youngest con men ever is like potentially

A con. A con man. Surprise Pikachu. Conception. No, it's what he did. Because he even worked for FBI or whoever, the government, for fake and fraudulent checks because he was so good at that. And I know he caught a fuck ton of people because of it.

Later on, I think he went to go like found like a anti-fraud firm or something like that, like a security firm that basically handled stuff like that. Just really good on him. Pulling the ladder up on everybody else. What a piece of shit. I made mine. Fuck y'all down there. It's a great movie too. Is that mouse? Turn that milk into butter. Was it Catch Me If You Can? Yeah. Is it Scorsese? Yeah.

Oh, does Corsese do that? No, I want to say it was Spielberg. Spielberg. Spielberg. You want to know what a good fucking movie is?

The Death of a Unicorn. I just watched it in theater with my wife like two days ago. It's hilarious. It's got Paul Rudd and that girl that plays the girl from the Addams Family in the new fucking rerun or whatever. Oh, I know what you're talking about. Super popular actress. I have not seen it. Such a good movie. Wednesday? Yeah, Wednesday Addams. What's her? It's a girl that plays her. It's her and Paul Rudd, and they go out, and they're meeting with some dying businessmen with –

cancer or whatever and he's like on his deathbed and paul rudd's the lawyer that's gonna like oversee the estate and he's like trying to close this deal and they fucking spoiler alert they hit a unicorn on their way up there into this guy's like huge mansion out in the woods and the unicorn dead body they don't know what to do so they throw it in the trunk and then the unicorn has like healing properties and it turns into like this whole shit show just spirals but it's just this movie of like

there's zero fat on the movie it's like john wick like there's no background this is fun to watch here's what happened just action for an hour and 20 minutes five minute conclusion fucking credits roll the end just turn your brain off and laugh yeah just fun shit this is fucking wild cocaine cocaine bear kind of i haven't seen cocaine bears oh dude is it good have you watched it no i haven't seen i haven't seen it either i just know the premise is this like hobo with a shotgun

Yeah, it's good. Cocaine bears, I think it was just like, hey, let's just have fun with this. Well, it's based off real life. Yeah, other than they like amped. Well, like extremely loosely. Well, it's like every horror movie ever. They're like, this is based off of true events. It's like there was, in fact, a farmhouse. There was a farmhouse where somebody heard some steps one day. A cocaine bear, they have a...

The kids do coke in it, too. What? That movie goes... Yeah, dude, that movie's a fun-ass time. Like, the kids find it. They don't know what it is. They accidentally get into it. This cocaine's too hot. This cocaine's too cold. They're like, what's wrong with... This cocaine's just right. What's wrong with your kid? I don't know. And he's like, I feel so good!

like they're running the bears just mauling everyone everyone that's violent as shit and then it's just coked up out of its mind it falls in love with cocaine so then it's just speaking of cocaine uh and to kill a unicorn the who's the the actor he's like the nerdy kid and meet the we're the millers or meet the millers whatever the fuck that movie is yes he plays in marvel shit now the redhead yeah anyways he uh

he's like the rich entitled prick son and he's like yeah he's fucking grinding oh he's like grinding up the unicorn he's the one that's like you want me to suck that mexican cop's dick and meet the millers oh god i haven't seen meet the millers in a minute what's 10 000 it's like 50 bucks oh i'll just give you 50 bucks fuck have i never heard of this movie

He turned out to be an incredible actor, not just the punching bag of Hollywood. Because he's something Adam, I think. It's a funny movie. And its audience love it. Critics are going to hate it. It's like critics versus audience. So it's a good, it's a fun. Go and have fun. Me and Hannah have date night. So I see every movie in the theaters pretty much. Just to do it. And the new Jason Statham movie is super good too.

working man. So basically Beekeeper 2? It's Beekeeper 2. It's literally all it is. Jason Statham 13. I don't remember who it was, but I mean the entire... It's another chocolate movie. Jason Statham beats people up. There's five minutes of introduction of like Jason Statham works construction, but he used to be former SAS British guy. Go beat that guy up. Oh wow, we didn't know he used to be a Navy SEAL. Now he's going to kill us all. Eight times.

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Until you do. Sleep better, stay cooler. He like opts to carry the M14 to go on like the final mission because that's what he had when he was in the service or whatever. But his service buddy that hooks him up with the M14...

has this at first I thought it was a thermal like it's an ungodly big scope and I was like what the fuck is that and he's running around with it just murking dudes the whole time and then he finally gets to the scene he's got the got the little flip down um pad on his vest and he's like taking machine gun fire and he flips the little pad down and it's a fucking bluetooth scope so he just holds the gun up looking like a dick just fucking it domes the guy

I've never heard of this. Dude, there's so many good movies out right now that they're not major blockbusters. They're just good. They're just silly and fun to watch. They're just good 80s movies. We got The Accountant 2 coming out on the 25th. I'm stoked for that. Yeah, I'm stoked for that. We all went to my house the other day and watched The Accountant, the original one, just to prep for it. That was a better movie than I remember it being. I remember it being good. But it was...

It was just fun. It doesn't have to make sense. It's just fucking cool as shit. Those movies are the ones you just go and don't, again, just go into it having fun. Don't go in thinking it's like, well, this is going to be the next...

Lord of the Rings or this epic story. It's never going to happen again. No. Just going to have a good time. Beekeeper. I love Beekeeper. It was just fucking stupid. It's fun. Fun time. Working Man. Sounds like a great movie. That and like Working Man. I think it would have dethroned Snow White. Yeah. It was already like tragically crashing. That movie was. It's like some random fucking Jason Statham movie. That movie was horrible.

horrible you had to watch it you went and watched it i took my kids yeah it was god awful because they originally started out they had seven dwarves and then peter dinklage yeah rode in on his small horse and fucking was like you can't portray short people as dwarves in a movie that's bad and then all the other dwarf actors that aren't a-listers are like bro i'm

there's only like seven roles a year that require a dwarf and now there's a movie with fucking seven of them and you're fucking over everybody else so then they're like mad that they weren't dwarves from the guy who made his entire living being called a half man on hbo yeah he pulled up is this seriously what happened yes peter dinklage got his fucking panties in a bunch of dudes probably wanted to play that movie yeah they did so they were all pissed off he pulled up the stool after yeah like okay well we're not gonna

there's no ladder the one we used to get to the high floor we just picked it up and walked away with it dude so then they're like okay well we'll just have seven people so they get basically got like the seven dei hires it was like the the most diverse seven people on the fucking planet that you could possibly imagine only one of them was a little person and then

Then they leaked that that's what they were doing and everybody got super pissed and they're like, no, it's Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, not Snow White and the seven random motherfuckers living in the forest. So they're like, fuck, fuck! Snow White and the seven dead gypsies. So they're like, well, CGI the dwarves, which is what they did, which is fine.

They CGI'd the dwarves. I heard they looked horrible. They looked fine, to be fair. Like, that was fine. That part didn't bother me. But then, like, they had apparently already hired the seven DEI hires to play in the crew, so they couldn't fire them because they were going to get fucking sued because they had apparently already filmed, like, half the fucking movie. So now they're just like, well, you guys are a band of thieves. So now it's Snow White, the seven dwarves, and a band of thieves.

That were originally the Seven Dwarfs. So now there's a new band of thieves. So like literally the whole movie, the whole storyline is fucked up because it's like 75% of the movie is introducing you to the 30 fucking characters that are now involved in this movie. And then there's like 10 minutes that the whole poison apple and all the shit. I'm not kidding you. I went up, walked out, took a piss, came back in. Everything regarding a poison apple had already happened and the movie was over.

Right after they introduced all the characters. Wait, the poison apple just happens at the end of the story? Yeah, no, the whole movie is like 75% introducing all the characters and then the whole storyline and conclusion wraps up in like 20 minutes. It's really weird. The thing that shocked me when I saw the clips start to circulate online, like on Twitter and shit, is the screenshot that everybody uses of, yeah, she's doing the fucking Leonardo DiCaprio from Wolf of Wall Street. Yeah.

All that shit. I thought that that was a Photoshop. I thought that they were purposely making her look retarded. Nope. That's a genuine screenshot from the knife. The sword when it's pointed at, I don't know who has the sword, but the sword at her and the Huntsman or whatever. And she's like,

Nick, have you seen that? The lady doing, like, acting like she's her. Jamie, bring it up. You, like, that is a real, actual screenshot of the movie. I don't think I'll ever watch that movie. Yeah. It's something. Oh, you don't want to talk about Minecraft? I haven't seen it yet. I haven't seen it yet either. I thought we should all go see it together.

I saw the one viral clip where when somebody touches a creeper and it starts blinking or just the one dude yells Allah Akbar really loud and everybody laughs. I saw that part. That's about it. Oh, I'm sorry.

It's like the creeper starts blinking orange. It's about to blow up and somebody just screams that at the top of their lungs. Dude, they've had to shut down movie theaters this week because when they drop the tiny zombie on top of the chicken, like people just go crazy in the theater, start throwing popcorn, start throwing water bottles at the screen. Some poor minimum wage employees because people can't behave in public.

I don't know. I've talked to a couple of people that work at movie theaters. They love that job. So I just mean like having to clean all the shit, the amount of, they love it because he's like, dude, the amount of fucking iPods and shit that I have for free, just falling out of people's pockets. They keep them. Yeah. Sorry. Continue. But no, no, there, there's just been this big, this big thing going on this week. People going to see the new Minecraft movie. And as soon as Jason Momoa shows up in the ring,

And there's a chicken and a little baby zombie drops down on the chicken. Everyone just goes crazy and starts throwing popcorn. The chicken jockey. Yeah, the chicken jockey. And it's been a big thing across the United States where people go crazy and just go absolutely nuts ruining movie theaters. I couldn't tell if it's a bit. If it was, now it's caught on. So now it's just everything. It's caught on like hell. And Jack Black came out earlier. I think it was today or yesterday. And he was like, yeah, I love it.

Because people are just going nuts over it. It's like people aren't watching it because it's a good movie. People are watching it because it's such a meme that it's such a bad fucking movie. So I'm not sure I would get any of the jokes. I've never played Minecraft. I don't know if... I don't know that there's jokes from my...

Steve and you dig and you build shit. Pretty basic. No, we're old, dude. You played Minecraft. Yeah, dude. I played Minecraft when John was two years old on my lap. I used to play Minecraft beta. Oh, I guarantee. Have you played Minecraft at all? Both of y'all.

The most, it is super hard to be like, oh, this will be fun. And then you start mining and then you find unexplored caves and then you start building in those unexplored caves and then you start looking for diamonds. It gets out of hand real fast. Did you see the, because who's the, it's Notch, I think. Yep, the creator. Was the, yeah, the creator of Minecraft. What did they say? What was that tweet that somebody said?

About which part? Where they were accusing him of a bunch of shit. Like, forgive me if this is not a verbatim tweet because this is, you know, a conversation I had two weeks ago. But somebody was accusing him of a bunch of shit. He's like, oh, you mean that racist, homophobic, millionaire notch? First off, billionaire. That's what he, he literally, he tweeted, he's like, billionaire. That's it.

I love that story. It's fucking great. Dude, he, once he sold out, he sold it for like 3.2, 3.8 billion dollars. Yeah, because as the story goes, he built it in a weekend for a contest or something, a Java contest. Yep. And then he sold it for how much? 3.2 or 3.8 billion dollars to Microsoft. And when he built it, you had 2009, 2010, 2010.

came out for alpha it was dwarf something dwarf if i remember right and then it was minecraft and you'd had to buy it through his paypal account because i bought it through paypal this is oh same dude back in the day yeah and then i remember he posted on our message board in the minecraft ones that he got um flagged paypal like locked his account because they thought he was laundering money because he was pulling out like 180 000 a day because the game just blew up and he's like oh

There you go. I found it. It was somebody was quoting something of Notch and somebody replied, Notch is a racist anti-Semite millionaire. His input doesn't mean anything. He just goes, asterisk billionaire. He's living his best life. You watch him on, they had him on some talk shows and they're like, so what is it? And he's like, oh, just hang out. I'm

Just rich now. Don't have to worry about anything. I talk to him on Twitter sometimes. He replies to some of my shit. Yeah, he's a pretty bass dude. He just made his...

What, Microsoft bought Minecraft for $2.5 billion in 2014. He's just living his best life now. And he still has residuals. Yeah, and he's still, like, I think he's just talking about making a new game here soon. He's just chilling and tweeting, like, living his best life. He sold Minecraft but still gets residuals? He does. Let's see how it worked. How much does Notch make from Minecraft?

Oh.

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Head over to Shopify.com slash UnsubPod to upgrade your selling today. Shopify.com slash UnsubPod. All lowercase. Like, I know it's kind of the meme at this point, but if they release Minecraft 2, it's game over for the highest grossing game of all time. The cell made him a billionaire. Additional notch earns, like, in 2012 from Minecraft cells, he made $101 million. God. Yeah.

Because Minecraft made Microsoft all fucked up. So even if he was like, yeah, give me like one to 5% and then do whatever the fuck you want with the rest of it. He's quite fine. And to have that overnight success, because again, it was overnight PayPal. He didn't know what to do. PayPal locked his account.

Hey, I'm talking to PayPal. They thought I was laundering money. So it's locked. So I can't sell the game right now. Sorry. Got to figure it out. Got a banking account set up that can handle it and then had to transfer everything. But it was just chaos because, again, $180,000 a day or something like that. And he's like, and that was overnight because he free game. Then he's like, I'll just charge 10 bucks for it. That's life changing money for most people. Every day. Every day. That's fucking wild.

you know what do you do with that whatever you want apparently become an anti-semite on the internet i don't know how much they buy yeah he's doing quite fine for himself nick what uh what videos do you have in the works for any history coming up uh i'm working on john paul jones big fan of him is darth vader no it's uh the father of america's navy

So it was basically the Scottish guy that was a merchant marine and then killed one of his crewmen because they tried to have a mutiny. And then he knew he wasn't going to get a fair trial, so he fled to America. And then that was like right when the revolution was kicking off. So he's like, and I'll volunteer for the Continental Navy. And he does. And...

He ends up being present in when they attack a new province, which is basically the Bahamas. And they launched this guerrilla raid to like seize a bunch of gunpowder and shit. And then he does really good. So they ended up giving him a ship and basically just give him the orders of like, Hey, go fuck with the British. So he sails across the ocean and launches raids on England. And he's like the first person to like make an attack on mainland England, like 700 fucking years since the Vikings did it.

And it's just a fucking shit show of a story. Like wait, when it was, they were trying to go after America and he's like, fuck this. I'm going to. Yeah. Well, and that's why it was a brilliant strategy. Yeah. It's like, no one's going to expect that he's back there. They're undefended. So he's terrorizing England. So they're having to send back like a huge portion of their Navy to go patrol, to make the citizenry feel safe.

So it like just this massively disproportionate effect of like he just took out fucking two fleets from the British Navy that are no longer allowed to like interrupt America's business and like patrol their coasts and shit because they have to now go back and guard their home turf. It's pretty smart. Yeah, you're going in and it's like you're backgating. And he was like the whole time he was like straight up guerrilla warfare mindset. He's like, all right, we're going to go in.

And this is where this fucking town stores all the coal for the entire region. We're going to go in there and burn down all their coal reserves. It's like the shit he was planning. He's like, we'll see how much they care about owning the new colonies when they're cold all winter. Like, dude was legit as fuck. Which is also, like, just imagine just on the logistics alone back in, you know, the late 1700s.

Having to take all of those ships and manpower and everything to the Americas and then immediately send them back. And what were you waiting for? Message. Yeah.

Of, hey, we're getting fucked up over here. Someone went behind us and is now attacking our city. How many hundreds of dudes and how many months of time did you just burn at ships? It's like two months. His whole thing was like he had Marines. Because that was right when the Marine Corps got started at a ton tavern.

And like he exploited the fuck out of having Marines. So like his ships, America couldn't build a big warship. Like they just, they didn't have it. So like he's the USS Ranger was like 18 guns, which wouldn't like a big shit back then. It was like 42, 50 gun ship. He's got like, he's got like 18. So he's just got this little fast ship with Marines, but he just fucking covered the deck and those little swivel guns, a little tiny cannons and fucking muskets. And he's like, all right, here's the fucking plan boys.

We're just going to gun it and fucking crash into them. And as soon as we crash, fucking tie our ship to theirs and we're going to go fuck them up. And like he, he caught the USS or not the USS, the HMS Serapis, which is like an actual British warship. It's like the only time somebody had ever fucking commandeered a British warship that should have outclassed him. He's like, nah, fuck you. Pulls up next to him, ties his boat to his and the Marines just go out there and beat the fuck out of everybody.

His ship sank. That wasn't the Ranger. That was the Bomb Richard was his ship at the time. His ship ends up sinking because the British are just fucking blowing holes in it. But all the Marines are on their ship, so they just fucking took their fucking ship. Do you describe it as the Bomb Richard or the Bomb Richard? Bomb Richard. It's a French version of Bottom Richard, which was Ben Franklin's pen name during the Revolutionary Warfare bullshit. Really? Yeah, Poor Richard was what he wrote his...

alias or whatever that he wrote his name under so that's what the ship was named after so that ship sinks but they took over the hms serapis and he basically had to go and dock it inside of a dutch port which was a neutral territory

So the British had all these warships just waiting outside the Dutch Harbor for him to come out. And he's like, I'm not fucking leaving. And then finally they were putting like political pressure. So the Dutch were like telling him to fuck off. So he ends up like sneaking out in the middle of the night and they wanted him to, they wanted him to fly a, a French flag. They like came up with a legal reason that he would be able to fly a French flag. Meaning the British weren't going to be able to attack him. And he's like, no, this is American ship. Fuck y'all.

So he lost his flag when his ship sank. So he like just has like the description from like Benjamin Franklin and some letters and shit. I've seen that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is where the Serapis flag comes from is what it's called after the ship, the Serapis. He goes to some Dutch seamstress and she just like throws together what she can from the like shitty description of the current American flag. And he fucking slaps that bitch on the ship and sails out in the middle of the night and makes his getaway. Why does it sound like some shit we would do?

Hey guys, here's a ship. Okay. What we're going to do is we're going to put guns, little guns on the side of it. We're going to crash into them. That's the flag that she came up with. That's the only time it's ever like been like legitimately flown in us. History was some Dutch seamstress. We need to start using that. I love that fucking flag design. The, uh, I'm still stuck on the fact like that's a, that's a very cool story. I haven't heard that in a while. Like I just got like flashbacks to fucking high school history, but, uh,

I'm still stuck on Benjamin Franklin's pen name being... Was it Poor Richard? Yeah. Imagine all of your diplomacy for a budding country in the middle of a war. All the correspondence is being done by a guy under the pen name Broke Dick. I think it was like secret letters. Sincerely, Broke Dick. But there's just some funny shit that happens because back in the day...

So like when the Continental Navy was getting started, they're trying to start a Navy, but like they also don't really want a Navy because they don't want to be a global power. They just want people to be leaving the fuck alone. So like a lot of people in government don't.

Well, he's the reason that we became a big naval power. So they're not really paying Navy dudes shit, but they're also issuing letters of marquee, which basically means any fucking dude that has enough money to buy a boat is legally allowed by the US government to go out and seize British shit and just keep the spoils. Is it letters of marquee or marquee? I think it's just letters of marquee. Marquee, okay. I'm not sure. I'm just short for marquee.

I genuinely don't know. Either way, they're issuing that. So like that basically makes you a Corsair. You're basically a pirate, but you're saying that shit. They're just telling rednecks, go be pirates. Exactly. So like everybody's going to do that. So like a lot of the Navy dudes that are signing up for him, like every time they get the opportunity to like do some real shit that would do damage, they just would kind of want to like go plunder shit. And he's like trying to be a professional about it. So he launches this raid on Whitehaven and he wants to go like burn down all the ships in the harbor and –

He sends out his group and his group goes and does what they're supposed to and the two other groups go and just break into a bar and get shit-faced. And then he's like, well, fuck, we got to do something. So he's like, okay, we're going to sail up to Scotland and there's this Earl, like some high-ranking aristocrat and Earl. We're going to fucking go kidnap him and then trade him for a bunch of American sailors. They show up to his house. He's not there.

So all of his sailors, like the Marines are the only ones that have his back. Like the Marines are like, no, you're not fucking touching the captain. The sailors are like, they're ready to launch mutiny and be fucking pirates the entire time. And so the Earl's not there. And they're like, let's start fighting.

sexually assaulting people and stealing everything and he's like no no we're not actually pirates that is that is not what i said so why are you wearing the ray pack what's that sword you guys carry club oh no

I don't know. It doesn't have a name yet. I wonder what they'll call it after this week. Just doing some pillaging. He's like stuck in this situation where the Marines got his back, but his crew wants to do this. And he's like, all right, just...

Fuck it, we're going to go steal their silver set. And he goes and he steals this Earl's silver set, which is a big fucking deal, whatever, I guess. So he steals this Earl's silver set, and then he immediately starts writing the Earl's wife and is like, Madame, I'm so sorry, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'll personally buy it at auction and return it to you. I'm literally trying to fuck this chick.

And I know he's trying to fuck her because he makes copies of the letter and forwards copies to Ben Franklin, which is like the ultimate womanizer of the founding fathers. It's like, hey, bro, check this out. Literally. The 1700s equivalent of sending screenshots of spinning games is what this was. She opens up that last letter. It's a dick drawn. It's like a Thanksgiving turkey hand. Yeah.

What's that sword called again? Or he dipped it in ink and just smashed it on the paper. Kind of like I do on all my NFA forums. You want my thumbprint? All right. It's always weird. It's the bottom thumb. The bottom thumb? The bottom thumb? I hate that.

I'm going to give you that bottom. Give him the grand thumb. Put my bottom thumb in your front butt. Also, my Marines have the, what's that sword called? Oh, fuck. Oh, story time with Uncle Nick.

I can't wait for John to come hang out with you this summer. God, he's going to have so much knowledge. All right, John, I know you're going to bed. I need to tell your story first. We're going to talk about the rapier. John's just like, rapier than who?

John's going to come. That guy is literally insane. Just so we're all clear. What ended up happening. So he wrote her, wrote to Benjamin Franklin, like, yo, about to smash. She seated. Yeah. Legit. So he ends up like, it's like 10 years later. He ends up getting the plate back to her, but how did it,

So that goes on and the whole time he's like out there literally just kicking ass. Like the dude's a fucking one man army with his ship and he ends up getting dicked around because the British military like

to be an officer, it wasn't like about ability. It was like, you're from the right family. You know what I mean? And the Americans started copying the same mentality. So by commissions, exactly. So he, he was getting fucked out of every promotion possible, even though he's the only one that's actually good at shit. And then after, after the revolutionary war is over, they're like, he's still getting dicked out of these promotions and they're,

The Russian queen princess, whatever the fuck you want to call her. Catherine, I think it was. Catherine the Great. She has a war going on with the Ottoman Empire and she's hiring naval officers from anybody that has experienced Navy. So he ends up basically getting the okay from Thomas Jefferson to go over and –

be a naval officer for Catherine the Great fighting the Ottomans. Oh, shit. And, well, he gets over there and guess what other country is sending over a bunch of officers? The fucking British. And the British fucking hate him because he made him look bad. He kind of killed a lot of them. He made him look stupid. He made him look like shit. So they end up, like, staging this whole thing where he allegedly, you know, assaulted a 12-year-old girl, which almost every historian is like, this is completely fabricated just to get him kicked out.

So he ends up getting basically ostracized because of that, moves back to Paris, lives there the rest of his life, passes away, and he's like in some unmarked grave forever. And then Teddy Roosevelt becomes president and gets a hold of the French, and the French really like him. And the French end up finding his grave, and they exhume him, and they bring him back to America, and now he's got a tomb at Annapolis as the father of the U.S. Navy. Fuck yeah.

And he started off being a fucking pirate. Dude, he's got... Messing up everyone in unconventional warfare. Privateering is a wild... When he pulled up to the USS Serapis, they were just hammering his ship and they basically asked him if he was ready to surrender. And he responded, I've not yet begun to fight. And then sends the fucking Marines in and makes them surrender. Captures their whole ship. It's fucking awesome. It's such a wild time in how war communication, everything worked. Because you're just going based off of what...

Your boss has said that they said. I got a letter from a fucking pigeon. Yeah. And then you're like, we're getting on the thing and we're going to go on that boat, kill everyone and then take it. And then we'll go get drunk afterwards. We'll go grab bar. Like imagine showing up to unsub. It's like, okay, we got to rob some silverware.

Nick's like, I want to grape some people. I'm like, well, hold on. So it's unsubbed. Yeah, yeah. Nick, let the guys go. Well, imagine like sailing down to Florida and telling all their rednecks with boats, take your guns and take as many of their ships as you can. You know, they're all like, hell yeah. That's wild.

Which is funny because that's what drives me fucking crazy when you have people like Biden and shit like that. It's like, listen, Jack, the kids touch my arm hair or my leg hair in the pool, like that shit. He's like, you can't own a cannon. You have in no point in American history have you ever not been able to own a cannon for one. That's just absolutely a fabrication. You've always been, I own a cannon.

There are less regulations on buying a cannon than a Glock. Can you just build a cannon? You can buy one. You can buy one. If you can afford a cannon, you can buy a cannon. Tally-ho, lads. Just over a counter? There is no background check, nothing, because it's a black powder. It's non-fired. It's like that green text. Yeah, tally-ho. Tally-ho, lads. But on top of that, there are periods in American history where the American government at the time just says...

Fuck, we don't have enough guns. Hey, if any of you citizens have a ship that has cannons on it, we could really use it about now if you want to go fucking kill some people. Yeah, it's legal now. You can do these things. As long as they've got that flag, you can go fuck them up. The funny part is, like, just the British perspective of what that had to be like, that the colonies were launching raids on mainland England. It would literally be the equivalent of, like,

If in 2012, the Taliban rolled up to Manhattan with a battleship. What the f*** is happening right now? The UNO reverse card. Where's our Navy? Dude, it'd be f***ing wild. You're out there like, what the f*** is going on right now? Even as a citizen. That'd be the perfect place to raid because they don't have guns. Hey.

You would have Harlem fighting back with their illegal fucking guns. I've had this skit. No one wants to occupy Harlem. I've had a skit in my head forever. Ever since I watched the remake of Red Dawn. Yeah. And I was like, if we could make like a hot shot, like a Charlie Sheen's hot shot, like scary movie parody of Red Dawn, it would be so fucking funny to have like the Chinese invade mainland America and just like

I just want the scene where they're recording the Chinese talking and the Chinese are like, okay, sir, that last section of the country is pretty rough. But the section we're coming up on now has very strict gun laws. Nobody's allowed to own guns. We think it should be really easy to take over the city. Okay, what's the city? Chicago? Chicago?

It's just hard cut to them getting lit up by drive-bys from Impalas and shit. Choc-a-go. Chirac? I just want to see the part of that movie that's just our crew f***ing up a bunch of Chinese special forces in f***ing guerrilla combat. It's just us like...

I swear to God, I've killed that guy like three times today. The government doesn't want you to know this, but you can just take their nods after you kill them. Was it Chinese in the new Red Dawn? Yeah. Well, so it was supposed to be Chinese. And then all of the financiers for the movie made them airbrush out all the Chinese flags and turn it into North Korea. Because China was financing part of it. Which also, North Korea having the...

They don't even have the ability to feed their people. Yeah, flying here is a big... Oh, no. We have a friend here. We have a Quinn. Hello, Quinn. You're going to be on later, beautiful. Do you want to come say hey real quick? Oh, my gosh. Go wave. Go wave. Look at this guy. In here, right here. See?

There, right in the middle. Hi, everyone. Hello. For the future of what's going to come, or depending on how these... We're going to come. Nathan's going to come. Don't come. I'm going to come. Chickago.

Beautiful. I'm excited for it. We were just talking about if you drop Chinese paratroopers into like the Appalachian Mountains or, you know, Texas or somewhere like that, how well it would go. Who would win? A company of Chinese paratroopers or a high school trap shooting team? Just have to convince the South not to

Dude, I said that in a bit. I was like, if somebody invades mainland America, the biggest issue is going to be convincing rednecks not to have a taxidermy. That's the biggest ethical issue involved. The taxidermist can't seem to get the eyes right. My favorite meme is like the 120-pound Chinese paratrooper versus 250-pound corn-fed Bubba in the mountains. I love the one where it was like... Hey, wait, I've seen this one. Somebody had a video of

of .30-06. And they're like, just so we're clear, the average Japanese soldier weighed 116 pounds and you assholes were running around in the jungle with a gun rated for elk shooting these guys. Yep. What?

I never thought about the taxidermy thing and how realistic of a situation that would become if someone invaded. Well, I know we've talked about it. Do you know how many fucking... It would be like fighting in the Pacific Islands where they're taking fucking skulls. I was just going to say that. And teeth on necklaces and stuff. We brought that up when I talked about the 77th. Do you know how many fucking emails I got from people that are like, Hey, um...

My family has one of those skulls. What are we supposed to do with it? Can I buy one? Fucking not tell anybody? I don't know, bro. Is it...

is there a law against that human remains there's a weird law with because i you can't take new human remains if i remember correctly but if it's a like historical piece i don't know grandfather there's some yeah there's some gray literally there your grandfather brought it in please forward those emails to me i kind of want one i would love to have one yeah we really could an unsub school up there real quick also we have to like put it in a

No, like the painted Japanese skulls that were trophy shit. We'd have to put that in a case. Yeah. I also got an email that somebody got kicked out of a store in Japan for wearing my It's Never a War Crime the First Time shirt. And I was like, yeah, I can see how that would be confusing to wear in Japan. Well, it wasn't a war crime the second time either. The logo of Fat Man on it. Jesus, dude. And we've been talking about going to Japan for a while now. But Eli, you said tattoos are going to be a problem for us over there. Yeah.

Dude, it will be super interesting with this group when we go to Japan because it is...

Like the tram system or the subway system, you take that everywhere and then everyone's super quiet. So it's like being respectful. Culture is not eating and walking. So it'll be this weird in between between us and then $20 for 90 minutes all you can drink. So I'm like, oh, the guys get super shit wrecked. And then we're going to try to keep rules in place. You know we would be respectful to their culture. Exactly. I have a hookup so we can go eat with sumo wrestlers.

Which, like, nobody gets to do, by the way. Did you see the Shane Gillis thing with that the other day? Uh-uh. Shane Gillis was the, like, guest referee or announcer thing for an actual, like, sumo match. And it was the funniest shit. He has probably no idea, and he's just calling it out. No, and he won't know. He, like, was asking, like, hey, how do I say this? Oh, yeah, I don't know how to say that. Like, just, like, trying his best.

Have you seen... They're like, Shane, how does it smell down there? He's like, don't do that. Don't disrespect these athletes. Have you seen the video? It's like... It's not even a... I mean, it's a big dude, obviously. But it's not like... You think sumo wrestler, you're thinking like 400 plus pound dude. It was like... Dude was probably like 260, 300. He was a big boy. But they had like the best D-end or D-tackle in the NFL. One of them. Oh, yeah. And he like...

Full on, like three foot gap football stance comes up full like foot fire trying to move this dude. And this dude is just planted in the ground holding him laughing while this dude is just giving everything he can to try to move this dude doesn't move a fucking inch. Oh, those dudes are.

monsters man crazy their thighs are fucking that big i would love to go watch one of those calvin went he was he just got back from japan calvin might uh do the worst for me the other coach at my jiu-jitsu gym and

We have a student that grew up in Japan and his uncle was a teacher forever. And I guess his uncle's student grew up to be the head monk of one of the temple for like one of the biggest sumo teams. Cause all the, they have monks, all Buddhist monks. So all the, all those, that's where that all the sumo wrestlers, they know those things were big boat, little boat. You'll still have monks, Buddhist monks. So you're, that's where you get the orange garbage, Chinese culture. I think Japan is a little boat.

ideology of Buddhism. So they just have different mindsets on how Buddhism works. I thought Japan was more like Taoist. They have a mixture. So any of the, you have Taoism or is it Taoism? Something else.

They might be now. Back in the day, it was Buddhism. Christianity started taking in 1400s. I've got a very mile-high view of this. I don't really know the details of the culture. And then they ripped out Christianity. I think Nobunaga. I forget which dude ran in. He's like, no, get rid of this. We'll just go Buddhism. And then the other one is... Anyways, basically, all the sumo wrestlers, they're not professional athletes that make a bunch of money. They're literally like, they go to a...

a buddhist temple i guess this is what he told me i haven't checked this but like his understanding was basically they show up to a buddhist temple like i want to be a sumo wrestler and the buddhist temple takes them in and they don't get paid they don't get anything they just get to eat and sleep and train for free and they just do that their whole fucking lives so he got to go stay in this buddhist temple with the the sumo team and he's like calvin is like 155 pounds like he's not a big dude and he's like they were like scared of me

they live in a buddhist temple they ever seen a white guy covered in tattoos like and so they're just like on edge around him the whole time he's like dude you're three times my size you could just spike me off the ground and i'd be dead but he said it was super spike you into the end zone i said they were all like super nice you said shintoism shinto yeah that's okay yeah that's what i was like what is it there is another one shinto shinto belief do they have you watched that one um

I don't know where he's from. He's a white dude that is... Tom Cruise, Last Samurai. Yes, exactly. But he's a big dude. I'm going to watch that when I get home. Smaller compared to other sumo wrestlers, but he is almost... Oh, yeah, the Czech guy. Yeah, that's almost a Yokozuna level, or he is. But this dude, against like 300, 400 pound guys...

You've seen him truck them like it's nothing. This dude's 220. He's a small sumo wrestler. Terrifying. He hucks these 400-pound guys. Is he a white guy? He's like Czech, I think.

He's crazy good. If you pull it, dude. Just wait till the Russian Muslims get into that sport. Yeah, right? Dagestan. Bunch of fucking Chechens get involved. What was it, Nick? Three years, he forgets? Yeah, two or three years, forget. Three years to Dagestan. Forget. We just fight now. This is what we do. Cody, what do you got in the works on your stuff? Oh, God. Has anyone been shot lately?

Yes. No, dude. All I want to do is build businesses with unsub and you guys and hang out with y'all. You're like, I'm over video. Yeah. Well, I mean, someone gets shot. I do the video. I want to do other things. I want to hang out with my boys. I'm getting old, man. I've been doing this YouTube channel for 10 years now.

Don't you fucking demo on me. I'm not demoing on you, dude. I wish I had a resort property to sell, but, you know, I don't. Cody's like, I don't have a resort. Brandon wakes up with pink eye because that wasn't a hooker's butt. Don't tell me about what we did last night.

Why you gotta cast that evil on me? You're probably right at some point. I can't wait to go with Chris at their wedding tomorrow. God, now you got me fucking overthinking about it.

Because apparently American money is like super dirty. Yeah. Well, I'm not just American money. I'm sure it's every money. We've been to Vegas before, buddy. We know how dirty it is. I don't want to think about it. I don't know. I think we're all just doing our own thing and then trying to build businesses together and having a good time. We got a lot of good podcasts started lately. What are you working on, Mr. B-Live? Mr. B-Live's got a thing. We got...

Oh yeah, we do. Well, I like this month's focus for us is the autism awareness and we have, that wasn't the thing. I know, but that's the one I like. I hate my own. Could you stop talking about autistic people? I have a horrible idea about that. We do have a great thing going on this month. Yes, this is all. And we're doing, we're adding a special needs, a nonprofit once we find one.

on just shopping for which ones actually do the right thing and not just blow everything on. Yeah. Administrative fees and marketing and all the people like we want to make sure that like, I know at least speaking from my perspective, like we, we try to run this like a business,

And make sure that like we're spending this money as if it's our money where we want to make sure that it's the money you spend on the shirts actually goes to a good cause. Not just saying it does, but a place that like the money actually goes toward what they say it does because most charities are full of shit.

It's terrifying. Yeah, dude. When you look at the word non-profit and you're like, oh, they're nice. It's like, okay, non-profit. The NFL is a non-profit, just so we're clear. Just throwing that out there. The entity doesn't make a profit, but

Everyone on the fucking board of directors. It makes a million plus dollars a year. Yeah. It's terrifying. All on donated money. So if you guys do like help us out, like buy shirts, help with the autism community, we shop around and we find the best charities to put that forward too. We're going to raise so much money that we're going to find out everything about autism that we could find out and then nobody's going to like us anymore. Rich, could you tell us what you think about autism real quick? Oh, look, a new person.

Rich uses kill minorities. Just what this podcast needed. Another hairy white guy in a tank top walking to the club. I just want to show you that you're not the only one that can pull this off. I've been outside. Autism is my favorite type of retard because Eli has been able... What? Oh, they're supposed to be my least favorite? You guys aren't fair. Also, how does that little make the action figures work show? Did you just type in...

What do you ask it? If you say a specific person or do you have to describe the person? Yeah, you have to describe the person. Okay, got it. For me, it was like, man, that's actually alarmingly close. It just whitewashed me. It just looked like a white guy named Daniel. What's he dressed like? Like Cody. What's he dressed like? Like Brandon. Oh.

All right, Jamie, pull that up right now. Show them the thing. I was actually cracking up. Yours is great. You're a fucking gorilla. You look like a Minecraft character. It's a refrigerator with arms. Corn! And then corn. Corn, bush light. Bush light. A rubber duck. I was like, oh, this is great. And I hate communism super big. You got me. That last, one of the last podcasts that went up, they're like, damn, Cody's hammered.

You can tell because he's talking on his own podcast. It's the cocaine. No, you could... I would be terrified to see you on cocaine, actually. That's the one drug I've never done before. I think there's multiple. I was like, there's probably multiple. There's lots of drugs I'm sure you've never done. Crocodile. Crocodile. Yeah, dude. I want my skin to rot and my body. That's some shit only the Russians could have come up with. Crocodile shit.

What if we made a liquid version of the gulag that you could just inject into your veins? Make with red match head. What does the fucking Russian do with the big arms he was injecting what into his arms? It's just oil. It's just some oil that sticks inside the muscle fascia.

And he became like a quasi celebrity over there because his arms are so big. Synthol. Yes, it's because he was injecting nasty shit into him. Well, that's another one. Oh, there's the kid you're talking about. Yeah. And did you see his MMA fight? He looks like the dude from Umbrella Academy. Yep. The giant, the big fucking arms. Did you see his MMA fight? He did an MMA fight? Oh, yeah. Let me guess. How'd that go? He can't fight.

weird since I'm not working out doesn't equate to fighting period he got his fucking ass beat any of those dudes just gonna get their ass beat if I was his opponent I would just punch him in his fucking arms pop it pop his bicep goes into toxic shock I just like that's what they're like where you go like that and they're like I think that's good oh yeah there's the Indian guy too

That looks like a chat GPT thing of someone who like a computer that doesn't understand what a person looks like. Yeah. When I grow up, I want to be a cloud mom. I don't, I don't want to put in the work, but I want to look a certain way. That's fucking wild. That was a bizarre catch. I'm sure he gets all the bitches. Yeah. I'm sure he's saying it. And then we have, what else is in the, Oh, we got, let's say hi to Eli. Got that finally launched and y'all beautiful souls. I still have to do your interview.

and yours is after cody's cody cody's is yours was great too i love you almost made me cry on yours what'd he say what does he say give me a second no is that please hold yep because i'd never seen nick show emotion ever and so that i was like oh damn that actually that means a lot coming from nick the corn eating gorilla showed emotion

No, it's a lie. Never happened. I say that as I throw my son to you for several weeks this summer. It's fine. He's going to do great. John, you know what your dad said to me? Just slap him around. I'm going to show him my drop down and draw your gun technique so he can use it on Rich when Rich attacks him with a knife. Lay on your back. They probably have no idea what we're talking about on that one. I have no clue.

He's a cop. Look as white as possible. Skin changing stones. What the fuck are you guys talking about? Knife. Go. Me and Pewview did a video about the 21 foot rule with the knife. And I was like, I bet I could get shots off in 10 feet.

And I did. And what I did is, okay, go. I just immediately dropped to my back. And once I was on my back, I had my feet in between me and the guy with the knife. I drew my gun and shot off my back like 10 rounds and just mag dumped the guy. And some people on the internet think it would work. And some people think that I'm an idiot. Yep.

What, Rich doesn't think it would work? Rich doesn't think it would work. He said I should run away in a zigzag formation yelling serpentine while I try to draw my gun. As he's holding bad bitch. That was the best argument. I will say, I was like, the one comment that annoyed me on that short, because the short went like...

Not super viral, but the short got thousands of comments when we were talking about it. And somebody was like, wow, I can't believe the fat electrician is trying to argue combatives with Rich, a trained cop that probably has way more experience than him. And I was like, Rich? Maybe. But I don't think that most people have a grasp on how little combatives training the average law enforcement officer gets. Like female cops. Just period. Sorry.

It's like, ah, what do I call her? It starts with a B. Trash. You were just waiting to say that. Yeah.

How much combatives training does the average cop do, Cody? Did you see the... It's trash, dude. It's so bad. Shrimp. Did you see the video that just came out recently of the three British women cops trying to arrest a man? And he's just like, no. He just said no. Literally just basically just said no.

Was he calm the whole time? He's just standing up and they can't do anything. They're trying to pull him to the ground. It literally looked like my two-year-old and my four-year-old hanging on my legs. That's what it looked like. It was not good. It wasn't good at all. Some of those videos from the UK blow my fucking mind.

Where people are getting arrested for social media posts and shit? Well, those two. But, like, I just... The A is, like, a little bit of normalcy bias, but B, just, like, the people who are incapable of performing violence of any kind. There was a video I was watching of somebody getting, like, stabbed. Like, it was an older lady, I think, getting... Being stabbed on the ground. There's a guy on top of her just stabbing the shit out of her. And there's, like, eight dudes around her, like... Oh, and one dude eventually picks up, like, this light tin trash can and, like, throws it at the guy. Does absolutely nothing. And he's just sitting there, like...

go into town and none of these quote unquote men can do jack shit about it. You got a license for that knife? I don't think he's got a license. You got a stabbing license. They have to call the cops with the guns too in that situation. Yeah, because the majority don't carry guns. No, can't.

wait the police can't unless you're like the cops yeah the cops there are certified officers with firearms yeah you have to call the cops with guns to come help you in situations show what would you say with a gun is like SWAT to them and and straight up in Ireland how would you say that what would you say the ratio is of cops who carry guns versus cops who don't I mean the only cops who carry guns are like special

You gotta call them in. It's just like in the US, if you call a SWAT team in, like Brandon was saying, you gotta call the cops with the guns in. I wish that happened in America just to see how bad it would get. You're showing up with no guns like, fuck, dude. It's like, oh, this is why they carry firearms. Got it. How did a third of the planet get conquered by the SWAT?

Well, that was back before most of the planet had access to gunpowder. Turns out us... Took over a third of the planet to get spices, didn't put any of them on your food. What the fuck is going on? Turns out that starving yourself in protest doesn't stop a musket.

I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think a lot of people over there, even if they have knives, like a chef has a chef blade, an eight inch blade. You got to like register it and go through a whole process just to have shit like that. I don't know. Did you see the legal knives that they created with the block on the end? Yeah. I think you were telling me round tip knives. Have you seen those? So you can't stab. Still cut, but no stabbies. There's a whole thing.

Still stabbies. No stabbies. I hate everything. Square knife. Square British. Give me a honing stone and a screwdriver. It's like California with their not being able to put your thumb behind the fucking pistol. Just read that. I could stab somebody with that. Because it's still sharp too. Just rub it against a fucking rock for a minute. You can stab someone with it.

That's what's wild. Are they allowed to own lawnmower blades? It's like a machete. They have those weird-ass fucking rules.

The zombie knife rule, which is hilarious. What are their knife rules? I've actually never looked at British. Meanwhile, our British following what little we have is fucking having an aneurysm right now. Most of you guys probably agree with us. Yeah, if you're over in that part of the world, let us know about the lulls over there in the comments. We would really be interested to see that. You guys seen this shit? Also, we're sorry. This is a German SWAT wearing fucking chain mail. Oh, yeah.

I think we were talking about that the other day. German SWAT wearing chain mail because that's what they run into. I'd be so pissed. We're going back in time. The last time people in Europe were wearing chain mail, who were they fighting again? Are those people in Germany right now? Don't look at me. Look that way. Is that a Jerusalem cross? What?

God wills it. Dude, sorry, but wearing a plate carrier while wearing chainmail, I'd be fucking pissed. That's hot as shit. Yeah. Also, they have an unlocking folding knife with a blade up to three inches can be carried without valid reason. However, anything else, flick knife, butter knife, kitchen knife. Some would say that three inches is too much.

Or just enough. It's huge. At least we don't have school shootings every day. Well, at least y'all schools ain't a fucking shooting gallery. Sorry, I'm just reading. You're swatting where's the chainmail? That's your tweet. But

At least my wife didn't get attacked with acid for showing her ankles. Jesus Christ. I love my group of friends. Oh, when are we going to watch Lord of the Rings? Are we doing that? Name of time. Are we going to rent out a theater to do it? I think we should. We're doing the whole marathon. 100%. Everyone. Okay. 12 hours long. Yes. We're just going to commit to the bill. Oh, yeah. Let's do it. They got a bar in that movie theater. What are we worried about?

I'm down. I think I want DoorDash food there. Let's go. Is this an us thing? Are we inviting people out to come with us? I have no idea. It'd be recorded. It's also, I have no idea. The gang does. And then whoever we feel like inviting. Yes. Okay. Well, that one scene where he kicks the helmet, I don't know if you guys. The vein popping out. You got to remember that part. Was it?

Were you here when I talked about who they wanted to play Aragon? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. I think that was our last game episode. Okay. They tried to replace Viggo Mortensen. No, the first pick was Russell Crowe. No shit. Yeah, they wanted Russell Crowe to do it. They offered him like 10% of the money of the franchise, and he turned it down. And he's like, that was a mistake. Because it was like the Alec Guinness thing. Yep. Where like to play Obi-Wan, they would have given him like...

like something very similar like all the like some some percentage of the merch rights of star wars just like uh and then you add oh was that matt damon for avatar avatar and then james cameron's like i'll give you i think it was 10 owner 5 or 10 gross if you just play the part

And James Cameron also says, I don't need you, by the way. This is going to be massive with or without you. But I would like you to be involved. This is the main. So I'll give you that. And he couldn't because he was filming the Bourne series. And they were doing reshoots. He's like, I'm sorry. I cannot. So he's like, I'm probably the person who lost the most money.

period and that's all all of the avatar guess avatar gross right now 6.5 billion dollars right no four uh 3.8 or 4.2 billion dollars globally so the first one you just gave like five numbers sorry 4.2 4.2 the first one was 2.9 billion just for the first one uh-huh i don't know the second one i just looked up the first one but god damn he turned that down he yeah he was bored oh

Imagine now 10% or 5%, any percent of that. That's what he would have made. And it was all the IP. It was the entire IP. That's before. He would have had enough money to fly to Epstein Island as much as he wanted. So fine. All the fucking money in the world. That's where we draw the line. Really? Making fun of actors? Nope. I'm good with it. Continue. I'm good. That's about it. I think on that note, we can close her out. Are we going to do the thing? We can do it.

All right, guys. Thank you for joining the Unscribed Podcast today. I was joined by Eli Doubletap, Fat Electrician, Brandon Herrera, myself, Donut Operator. We love you. We love you.

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