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cover of episode Medieval History, War Tactics & The Best Ancient Weapons | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 219

Medieval History, War Tactics & The Best Ancient Weapons | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 219

2025/6/29
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People
A
Admin
B
Brandon Herrera
D
Dash
D
Donut Operator
N
Nick
通过创意和专业服务,在节日季节赚取额外收入的专家。
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Eli Doubletap: 我对参加骑士格斗比赛非常渴望,甚至超过了对家庭的渴望。我愿意接受赞助,并为此努力训练,成为团队的冠军。 Brandon Herrera: 我支持赞助骑士格斗比赛,并愿意提供必要的支持和资源。我认为这会是一个非常有趣和吸引人的活动,可以为团队带来更多的关注。 Dash: 我对骑士格斗的历史和技术细节非常了解,可以为参赛者提供专业的指导和建议。我也愿意分享我的经验和知识,帮助参赛者更好地准备比赛。 Donut Operator: 我认为赞助骑士格斗比赛是一个很有趣的想法,可以为播客带来新的内容和话题。我也愿意参与其中,并为参赛者提供一些娱乐和支持。

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This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things that people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to Progressive and save hundreds. Visit Progressive.com to see what you can save.

Progressive casualty insurance company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations. I've never wanted anything more than I want this right now. And I'm married with children. My dad is Sir Cum. A hundred pounds on a compound, bro. Yeah. Your poor wife. I didn't have unsub gets into mandingo fighting on my bingo card. Your dad asked the waiter if he could start whistling in English. Oh, no.

Say hi to Eli. He's racially ambiguous and Brandon. His hair is fabulous. Don't I? The dog took this position. There's a fat electrician. Welcome to unsubscribe. On the count of three, three, two, one. Loose.

Oh god. Luce, I like that. Well done. Didn't say fire, he said Luce. That's commitment to authenticity right there. Alright. Well, I get to do Donut Shop today. You do? Hell yeah. Usually, this gets to do Donut.

Jesus, you're starting with violence today? Sorry. We're two minutes into this, I get an overhand right from the two seats. Damn! To be fair, I can't establish the jab right now. Hi everyone, welcome to the Unsubscribe podcast. I am joined today by Eli Doubletab, fat electrician, Dash, Aaron. Is your name Aaron? Oh my god, I forgot my slave name.

administrative results and myself, Donut Operator. What up you beautiful bitches? Hi! Welcome. You have majestic hair. Thank you. Thank you. Doing my research was like, we'll see how he does on this podcast first. If I may, I'd like to introduce Dash as the cover art from the romantic smut that your wives and girlfriends read. It's not too far off, I feel. That is amazing. Yeah.

I was like, why does this dude look like he'd be on the cover of a romance novel? Chad, is it gay to recognize the prowess of another man's... I feel like he's just the Pokemon evolution of me. laughter

All of a sudden, I fed him the lightning stone. Duh! Him being a successful realtor is making more and more sense. Yeah. Thanks a lot, Steve. Here's the master bedroom. Imagine it. Imagine it. You can stand in it so you can lay on it. Wonderful. Look at that giant mirror in the corner. Some flower petals.

Do you do real estate? Yeah. YouTube is, yeah, just for fun. Yeah, my wife and I have done it for a while. What's your female client base like? Higher than 50%? No, I get along with the dudes more. I feel like it's just more chill. I think the long hair is more relaxed for a lot of the guys. Women just don't want to talk about long bows as much. No, no, no, yeah. No, unfortunately, it's not appreciated as much because they're gay. Damn, do I feel that, dude. I mean, yeah, women suck dick. I mean, that's pretty gay.

If you ask me. I mean, science. This does kick out. So do you guys know each other? Yeah. How long have you guys known each other? I don't know the lore between any of this. How long did we go back? Maybe two years. We've served in the ranks together.

His Majesty the King's army fighting against the French in France campaigning on many a campaign Sir, please leave the medieval times. I'm sorry. Did you guys work together? No? Technically yes. Yeah, yeah our first video together was like a LARP. Yeah, we served in the LARP Corps together. Yes. Yes.

We did a bow versus ballistic dummy as the first one. Yeah. Everyone got mad about the quality of the armor. But damn, dude, I can't afford legit cuirasses all the time. Very expensive. Guys are getting on my ass about that stuff. It's going to be a super autistic episode. You were saying that yesterday. Do we really think the medieval peasants wouldn't be rocking Amazon armor if they had Amazon armor?

that's what i'm saying that's exactly what they would have been that was one of my points dude that bought the cheap armor and watch him die king henry this guy can beat on a piece of metal with a hammer for 18 years or you can just give jeff bezos like six grand no ye olde wish.com contracting lois bitter has been around for a while all right favorite favorite night movie

- A Knight's Tale. - It was fun, yeah. - That's my top two for sure. It's tied for one. - Yeah. - I was like, "Nate already had one of my notes." - Is that the Heath Ledger one? - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah, that was pretty fun. - Yeah, that was very fun back in the day for sure.

That was a movie that could have only come out of the early 2000s. Yeah, I think so. So great. Just running down there with no armor, jousting. Even with wood, it's going straight through. Queen existed. Yeah, medieval peasants chanting, we will rock you. Huge back in the day. It holds up so well. Yeah.

It's a classic. No, that or what's the... God, I forget the name of it every time. It's a Netflix exclusive one with Matt Damon and Adam Driver. Oh, yeah. Where they have a night fight at the end. Yeah, the last duel. Yeah. Based off of...

That's factual. Yeah, that was based off the last duel to the death, I think, that was recorded. The last actual death by combat. Also, wild story because no one knows the true story. Exactly. There's three variations. Yeah, it's a trippy story for sure. I just thought the knight fight at the end was actually like, oh, this is a full-on cage fight with swords and armor. And opponents.

die. It's not like, oh, honor him. Yeah, and that's the cool thing, I think, too, because in doing what I'm doing, I've met a lot of guys that do the buhurt, which is the full cage contact sports MMA of the grappling.

with the armor and all that stuff. And there's one guy out in Germany to queet him. And so he's given me some armor pieces to test and we've kind of gotten close back and forth. But he does unscripted night fights with different cultures. So he's got a crew that he goes with. One guy is like a samurai and a knight. And so the weapons are dull, but they straight up brawl. And it goes into a clench within like 15 seconds every time, right? The clench and then the takedown. It's really not fancy. It's not fancy swordsmanship. It's instant engagement takedowns.

I think I've talked about that. So that's the individual that does those realistic battles. Yeah. Like, hey, this is how this would play out actually. I think so. And he's a German guy. Yup. And then they'll do like three peasants versus the knight. Yeah, five peasants versus the knight. Yeah, that's the guy. Brutal. Because he just goes in and murders all of them. It's like, oh, this is actually how this would play out. And that's where you see there's no flash or anything. It's like, I'm going to just...

Stab you in between the crease of the armor and watch you bleed out. Jesus. Oh, it's gnarly. Where does he keep finding more people to volunteer to be the peasants? It's super good shit. If you haven't watched that, that is fantastic to watch. Have you done any of that yet? No, no, I haven't. No, that's a lot of investment for initial costs, just for the armor sets and everything. I would love to do it. I've done wrestling and grappling jiu-jitsu for a long time.

What do you mean? How much? For all that stuff? Yeah. I mean, he sent me some stuff and just like for the gauntlets and everything, that's like 400 bucks for just the gauntlets. And that's like a cheaper part. They articulate and everything. And I'd say, probably as I thought, I said, I'm going to sponsor him. We're going to fight him like a Pokemon. Oh, I will do it. You will be our champion. I'll do it.

straight up no i've i've done jiu-jitsu for a long time brandon i choose you you come out 100 sponsor i'll go in the cage a heck yes how long you've been doing jiu-jitsu oh like eight nine years black belt no no no i took it i took time on purple i took tom on off off off you know how it is yeah older yeah it's like you can't really do it consistently bro we're sponsoring a night we're sending him to buffalo bring in the company

So can I have a different name? No, I hate Cumb Nights. What is your name? We're sponsoring this. It's our name. He's right outside the Buffalo Public School System headquarters and just like, bring out your champion. Just

So come the night of the random of the unsubscribed. I can get Bunker to make the come flags for the guide on. Oh my gosh. Dude, we will buy the nicest. Dude, yeah, get this. The gang sponsors a night. We'll go film it.

You think we're joking. I don't. I'm serious too. I've never wanted anything more than I want. And I'm married with children. You kiss them goodbye and walk to your marriage. No, we're going realistic horseback the entire way. Your kids are still younger, right? Yeah. How old are they? They're all under 10. They are 7, 6, 5. Bro.

Do you know how cool it would be for him, though, to have his kids show up and, oh my god, my dad's a knight and five years old? My dad is Sir Cum. Think of the children with the name. Give me something here. I don't know what I'm saying. It's cool. Sir Cummius. Sir Cummius.

Your last name is Cision. Oh, God. Cision. That's your Cision. Oh, we've got to change up the PR for the kids. You wanted to do, actually, I think you're the one that talked about it. We've done. Because they do it out at that museum we went to, me and Ethan. That furniture museum and old village thing in, what's that town? New Brothels. New Brothels, yeah. They

They said they do it there every year. They have a Renaissance festival and they have like the night fighting. Cause people want us to do it. The night fighting. Yeah. And then we've already got ball. Like though we got people that would be like, Hey, we'll loan armor for that. If we do the fights, that's kind of cool. I have seen a couple of those videos though, where, you know, people are just using the big fucking hammers and shit. And you just get, takes a hit to the back of the head and the, the arm or like the helmet dense. Yeah. I mean like anybody got an ibuprofen. Yeah.

back before they developed crumple zones and all the impact just goes right through the metal into your body. The back of your skull is the crumple zone. Yeah.

I try to argue with old people about that. Like old cars back in the day, you could get in a fender bender and they were fine. I go, yeah, but you weren't. Yeah. They're meant to do that so you don't die. Yeah. Your body explodes on the inside. That's what would happen. Hmm.

Old people. So we'll do, are you down to join this medieval festival? How many pairs of knight armor do we need? Of course. You already have one, I'm sure. Me and him could probably wear the same set. Not at the same time. We're close enough. We're not at the same time. If Ali's lord commands, I shall answer. I'm not wearing the knight armor the entire time. It's going to get hot as shit.

Yeah, that's the one thing. I don't want to share. It's going to get sweaty, dude. The gang does this in November. August. The gang dies from...

But we just got to make sure you got the full kit. So you got the arming jacket, the mail, and then the plate and all that stuff. Side quest. Dude, I'm going to start doing more deadlifting. Jesus. Yeah. Yeah. It was like 60 to 120 pounds for full mail. Yeah. I'd say probably because everything like the mail and then the plate and all that stuff is probably 60 pounds. I would say it's probably close to that. Depends on the quality. Because right now, a lot of guys that have heavily invested use titanium plates.

So it's going to be weight. Oh, that's cheating. It's going to be a fraction of the weight for the same amount of protection, if not better. How much is the titanium suit? I don't know. The guy at Dequitum, he has one, but I've never asked him how much it is. But his real suit is part of his thing. Ye olde SR-71 armor. I was coming up with an SR-71 joke.

What does Master Chief wear? Is it Mjolnir? Yeah, Mjolnir. It's light though, right? It's freaking light, right? You just can't move. Get some Ceramite, Space Marine it. The God King Emperor. That's what demands. There's a bunch of people in our audience who've never felt the touch of a woman who are loving this episode.

I'm so stoked for this. I'm straight up tackling somebody. I'm not messing with swords or nothing. It's going straight to the ground. You train, right? Me and you, we'll go in the same time. Just straight up, just go straight for the takedown. Double A, done. He's looking for another muscle group to tear. Yeah, I know.

I never get torn doing combat. I always get torn doing dumb stuff like bench press. That is the dumbest thing you can do is fight in night armor, I think. That's what I said. I never get injured doing dumb stuff. I always get injured doing stupid stuff like stuff that shouldn't injure me, injures me. Because the last year you popped two titties on a bicep? No, the two titties. The first titty was like four years ago. So it's been a while. 450 pounds.

Yep. And then a pushup. No, just freak accident. And then you caught water. Yep. This is true. This is the wild. Oh, fuck yeah. Okay. Well, we'll set that up. And Brandon, when do you want to fight? What's up? October, late October. We'll do this. Sure. Yeah. Well, whenever it's not fucking a billion degrees outside in Texas. Hypothetically, if you did announce you were running for Congress, would that be after?

Because there's nothing cooler than having a campaign rally while you're fighting as a knight. No, if you do it again, we could have knights next to you as you announce. What in the idiocracy? That is right up there with President Comancho. I present to you the not-so-secret service. I wonder who's protecting Brandon. Is it the phalanx in front of him? Jesus Christ.

That guy's got my book. Well, we're going to do that then. I'm super fucking stoked for this. Admin, I just watched your breakdown of the Battle of...

What was the last of us last of us God what a godforsaken show Jackson Hole, Wyoming I didn't think about a lot of stuff you brought out until you started talking about I was like mmm Yeah, they did that for 25 years Yeah, 20 years to build make a fortress in the valley. What the hell were they doing? You guys haven't watched it yet Have you I have no interest in watching the second season first season was alright. I

Like, I enjoyed a good bit of it. I will give it credit. First season, episode one, when the outbreak was happening, was very good television. Yeah. Very entertaining. And the last episode I thought was pretty good. Yeah. A couple shit in between was all right. But, like, no, I enjoyed it. I had a good time with it. Second season, I already know what's up. I'm not watching that shit. Yeah.

I was really wondering too, because like a lot of that revolved around, you know, the barrels full of gasoline. Like, where are you making that now? Because it is like 25 fucking years after that's no longer a thing. Yeah. Admin, what do you point out there? Their wooden wall, their wooden wall, which makes way less sense when it's that. Massive OSHA violation. Just kidding.

Literally with the worst catapult-like metal ramp just launching these metal barrels. They have to shoot them, and then they throw torches to light them on fire. What the fuck? I don't get it, dude. So now you have flaming zombies that are all over your wooden wall. Yes, yes. Your very dry wooden wall. Do they even have a trench? No trench. You think they have anybody? Please, love God, build a trench. Yeah, it's like 101. Just dig. Just dig a trench. Barbed wire, trenches. I always wanted a moat.

A moat? Heaven forbid a moat. A moat would be dope. I want a drawbridge for my house. How cool that would be. You'd get really old for the FedEx guy. He has to do it every time. I fucking hate this house. You just have a bunch of stomped Amazon packages outside your house.

Fire it up, put it on the catapult, launch it over. I need a moat now. I don't want anybody to steal my little boy replica I'm going to put in my front yard. It's a weird thing to steal.

The Chechens may steal it. You ever met a tweaker? It's scrap metal to them. Oh, that's very true. It's fair game. How much is it weigh? It's like 800 pounds. It's ridiculous. It was really funny to drive across town in a trailer. I got some good looks. Afraid of tweakers stealing your little boy? Yes.

There's copper in your skin. Let it out. Hey, Brandon. Yes, Eli? When you think of businesses that are just crushing it, bonker, onset, what's the first thing to enter your mind? That's easy, Eli. A good child labor law attorney. Huh? Eli, I said Shopify. What did you hear? Actually, it was the overlooked secret behind the business. Like I said, Shopify. Oh.

Which brings us to today's ad. Shopify. I mean, we use Shopify on a daily basis. That's right. We use Shopify for Bunker Branding and Unsub. Those magical shoes we have, well, they're linked through Shopify to the mythical store Bunker Branding. And because of Shopify, they communicate. It's like your mom and your dad on their anniversary night. Not yours. Not yours.

Nobody does selling better than Shopify. They are home of the number one checkout on the planet. With ShopPay, which boosts your conversion up to 50%. 50%. Just like the age of all of our factory workers are 50% the age they need to be to be legally employed in the United States. Upgrade your business and get the same checkout we get over at Unsubscribe or Bunker. Sign up for your $1 per month trial period over at Shopify.com slash UnsubPod.

Head over to Shopify.com slash UnsubPod to upgrade your selling today. Shopify.com slash UnsubPod. All lowercase. Your nervous system is made of copper. With it, you brought up on that. The one thing I always go back, YouTube didn't exist, so you don't have tutorials. And then also people, I don't know what they were doing during the outbreak, but you had soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan. It's like, whoa.

what's going on? Exactly. They're just like, yeah,

Oh, shit. Are we stuck here now? But the training and everything, because you pointed out they don't have MOLLE and stuff. They have like ALICE gear, but what the fuck are people using? Should be good enough to carry ammunition. They have no crew-served weapons. Brown and 50 Cal exist. SAWS exist. M60s exist. This is the last of us. 240s exist. Museums exist. America exists. Brant Herrera existed. He was like eight. Yeah, he'd been, well, yeah, he'd been.

Imagine being permanently stuck in a timeline where the most recent camouflage, the cutting edge is ACU.

No, no, no. Predates. Really? What is it? 2006 is when ACU, the end of 2005, early 2006, ACU got rolled out. This is 2003. And the last one was 2003? Oh. Don't get me started on this. I got God's camo in 81. But why not? I haven't been able to find the proof, but I'm almost positive it was literally just some congressman's son that got the contract. Because when they were developing the new camo to replace the Lord's flannel...

They had like seven camos that they ran through and they settled on, they did like testing for years. They did testing and they settled on one that looks almost identical to multicam. They settled on it. They did the testing for years and then they went into the meeting and they're like, I like this one more, the digicam. And it wasn't even one of the ones that they had tested.

So they ran through all the testing of like, it was like six to eight different camos, found the best one, and then just pulled the shittiest camo ever out of left field. And we're like, we're going with this. A billion dollars was spent on ACUs. It was a billion. Yeah. $1 billion for that camo pattern, by the way. To develop it? Yep. Yep.

somebody that's what i'm saying i think my eye just twitched it was fucking hunter biden on his laptop with microsoft paint got a billion fucking dollars it's a grandma with her couch cushion yeah could we pull up the picture of the uh the the guy planking on grandma's couch in acu anything it actually blends in perfectly to be fair the navy's version of acu was objectively worse

The dark and light blue digicam. You know? Because if you're on a fucking warship, what you want to do is to be able to blend in with the fucking water. Where the fuck did he go? Oh, shit. Oh, no. We lost him. What happens if they fight on the water? They have to blend in on the water.

I saw where he hit the water! I just can't see him! Because you don't want to see anybody to be able to see you on a massive battleship. You got five stories up. Right. What are we hiding from exactly? Don't worry, I'm sure they're going to quit dropping bombs on the cruiser because Jim fell overboard. Fuck off.

God, you guys need to watch at least episode two, though, of The Last of Us because it is absolutely horrendous. They throw all tactical knowledge out the window, and it is 25 years they had to develop that base, right? Yeah, 25.

You know that one friend who somehow knows everything about money? Yeah. Now imagine they live in your phone. Say hey to Experian, your big financial friend. It's the app that helps you check your FICO score, find ways to save, and basically feel like a financial genius. And guess what? It's totally free. So go on. Download the Experian app. Trust me, having a BFF like this is a total game changer. Five years, dude. 25 years.

Yeah, it takes place 2028, so 25 years. Yup. And then there's, like, past that, it's like one guy gets in, and then it's just everything falls apart instantly. One big chungus of a zombie hits the wall, and then the whole thing falls apart. I'm like, what was the point, dude? It's so bad.

A chongus of a zombie is the best way to describe what it does. Yo, big chongus is in! Chongus is in! Big chongus! Oh, it's fire! No one, like, shits fire and, like, put a bunch of lead into it? And then it's just him running. He's like, they're in! They're in! They don't even have any downstairs, so all the zombies go up top and start killing everyone instantly. It's bad. I hate HBO, dude.

One of the complaints that I heard was that it was like, it looked like they were getting their ass kicked and then just suddenly everything's fine. Yeah, they won. Yeah. Yeah. Tommy's wife goes and releases the hounds and then all of a sudden they win. Oh, I forgot dogs are what helps stop that. Yeah. I don't know, dude. I don't get it. The fuck are dogs doing against zombies?

Unless they're immune. Yeah, unless they're immune. That is the ultimate Uno reverse card. Yeah. Because you're afraid to get bitten by zombies. Now they're biting the zombies. All the zombies start turning into dogs. Oh, yeah. In that case, I know a lot of toddlers that have turned into pit bulls. Oh, fuck that. Jesus.

Movie idea. A werewolf that's a toddler that turns into a pit bull. How funny would that be for a spoof movie though? We imagine World War Z but instead of developing the cure for immunity we develop a cure to make dogs turn the zombies into dogs. It'd be perfect. Can we go with mine? I thought mine was more plausible. I thought mine was more plausible.

Welcome, Dash. Did you watch a single episode before? I did. I braced myself for what would be unhinged shenanigans. He's like, I'll just watch this grandma episode real quick. It's like, oh, they're sweet. It's a nice, relaxed episode. Dear God, what have I done? I'm already on the plane. It's too late now. That was just such a funny, just such a polite letdown. Well, we could do my movie idea. No. laughter

Holy shit. I have to settle it in the medieval knight form of combat. I think that's a winner right there. That and the GED thing. Nick's going to kick my ass. That'd be great. I mean, okay, so going back to your medieval movies, what is your style of content specifically for yourself? Like me? Yeah.

So just imagine you were a kid and you had two toys and you go and you smash them together. That's kind of the idea behind a lot of it. I shoot super heavy duty war bows. So I've trained my life to get up to like 160 pound bow. So there's not a lot of people that do that. There's a few guys out in England, but not a lot. So I do a lot of archery type content against plate armor and different type of things.

like that because there's few people that have that capacity for that draw weight. Just for reference, like 160, what's your max pullback? The most I've gone so far has been like 120-ish pounds probably. Brandon, when you pulled, mine was 55. Yes, the compound bow, but it was 55 when you pulled it back. Yeah, that's absurd. 120? Fuck. 160. 160 is insane.

So that was like always been like my goal to try to get to that. So I've had some cool stuff where APA sent me something like a hundred pound compound bow, which is like the latest and greatest. And so I did that. And so just because a lot of people give me, I've never used the clamp. So I was using my fingers on it. And a lot of people give me grief about that, but they said it was fine to do. So I was pulling that and that was doing crazy.

crazy working he lies face right now bro you weren't using a fucking no lease you were just with your fingers yeah a hundred pound period accurate homie how do you just three fingers

So that was a cool one because I tested against hardened steel plate. And the war bows fail against that. But when you get that compound, like the modern bow, and it had a bishop arrow. So bishops are like, they're the arrows used for hunting elephants in big game. It's like a 1,700 grain double. What the fuck did you just say? You couldn't be allowed to hunt an elephant with a pointy stick. No, I'm serious. 100 pounds on a compound, bro. Your poor wife. Jesus.

180 pound rated makers right there. I'm like, Jesus! It is hard to articulate the satisfaction I have right now for having my reference material here in the flesh.

Bash doesn't know how many times in here and in real life I've referenced him, so it's nice to have my source material present. I can tell you, if you ever get into the AK space, I'm kind of fucked. Yeah. Have you ever had any...

I guess like x-rays comparing arms to see if after doing this for so long you have more bone density in that particular arm over the other? I actually haven't done that but I like this is anecdotal but I got like a while ago I got a massage and the guy was talking to me and he's like hold on yeah I mean pause pause pause

Pops. Just saying. He has strong hands. Yes. So what do you do? Okay.

My wife made the massage. It was a couple's massage. She was in the room, which I don't know if makes it worse. I'm digging a deeper hole. Dear God. She's sitting in the corner. We really don't need to know about that. She was in the room. It was way worse. I'm in it now. I'm going to finish the story. I can't abort. We're just going to go ahead. So your wife is watching? Yes, yes, yes. Okay. That's so funny.

But they said that it felt like there was like two different backs when he was doing it. Like the way the muscle ligaments attached on one side versus the other one felt extremely different. Like there was different, like it felt almost like a completely different anatomy for one left side to the right side. And then he charged you for two massages. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

so i do think that there's a little bit of that and historically you could find because they start at such a young age there was actually and they would deform the skeleton because it would mess with the growth patterns because they would start pulling it so young so they can identify archers by their skeletons because there is a curve and they have an example of one at a history museum over in england of an archer skeleton and they had like it was like a excess bone mass on a specific side so there's a little bit of a hunch as well just from the strain and

doing the actual weight of that bow. Kind of makes sense. It's like MMA with conditioning. Yeah. Yeah. Very similar. Yeah, exactly. Same concept as that. Yeah. So I've never done the x-ray. I've had people ask to do it, but I haven't done that yet. Do it. Okay. We'll sponsor that. Sponsor a lot. So it comes a lot. Whatever your name is, it's fun. We're on.

We're making sure that the strength of our fighters where we need you to be. Yeah, we need the MRIs the x-rays, you know, don't want to bet on a lame horse I didn't have unsub gets into Mandingo fight Different turn we are

So, and then in addition to that, I do a lot of stuff with the sling, the shepherd sling. So that's the thing that like David used, right? That's old school rope, like just rope over the head, swing around. And so I do a lot of stuff with that, testing it against different types of armor, soft armors as well. So I do some of the bone, like most of my stuff, I don't have the budget for like ballistic dummy, but I get like cow ribs and femurs and things like that to test it.

behind the soft armor, how a sling does against that. So if a rock would crack right behind. Well, you were saying, how big were the arrows? How many grain were they? So the arrows are like 1,500, 1,600 grains. And then how was for the 160 pounds? How big are those arrows? That's about 1,700 grains for that. 1,700 grains. But the arrows I got from Bishop Archery were 1,700 modern arrows. And they have like zero flex. And those are like 200 bucks a pop. The guy was nice enough to send me like six of them to try.

But they are really expensive. Yeah, 1,700 grains for references like just under 350 cals. God dang.

There's a massive, massive area. And then that one, how hard is that 160 pounds? I mean, that's the limit right now. I have 180 and 175 I've been working towards. My goal was always to get to 200 because that's like the world record technically. There's people that do more, but they just haven't. You know how the world record works where it's like people like, I want to pay for this. And so they get the record. But there's dudes out there that can pull like 210, 220 pounds.

But I've always just wanted to get to like that 200 pounds. So I've worked on that for a long time. But once I got to 160, 165, I've just been stuck. Like you just, your body, it's so taxing that you, your body just wants to break in on itself. Like, especially the left shoulder, trying to hold it out at that point. It's almost like compressing you in. And mass moves mass and you're not, you're like a buck.

90 maybe buck yeah yeah so you need to be like 250 how big were the guys pulling those well they were I mean they were smaller obviously that was just I mean they weren't like they were strong right that's the thing it's like

think of anyone with a specific muscle grouping for a specific thing like arm wrestlers or things like that where they get like you know they have very specific muscles for very specific movements it doesn't mean that you're strong overall it means you're strong in a specific specific movement that you do and so with those archers it was really just being able to be strong in that movement they were extremely strong but it wouldn't translate to like raw strength like i don't think they would out bench press people right it's just that one particular movement

And how hard is it hitting a lot of those objects? Armor? What's it punching? I mean, it's very hard. The only problem is that wood is not a great... Wood does not transfer energy well because when the wood arrow hits, it tends to diffuse it if it's not going through it. And it loses momentum fast. So if I go against...

let's say different armor types. So like mild steel is what's used a lot of times nowadays with like different types of replication. So mild steel is like low carbon content. And so it's not going to do a great job stopping it.

But if you have like a hardened steel, even if it's like C60 hardened steel and you have like 0.5 or 1mm to 1.5mm, at 1.5 it's not getting through. But at 1mm I can punch into it a little bit. But it's not going to go through male and padded gamestan. It's just going to punch into it. It's not going to hit the whole thing. Oh, shit.

it was a while to me is this what got you into your autism was like oh yeah i'll reach out to this guy bernard cornwell his work on the archer series got me into it then i found dash and i was like this this dude's pulling 160. what the like i was it was insane because once you start you're like

okay, I guess I'll get a heavy bow. Then you realize where you're actually at. I've been technically lifting weights since I'm 13. I was like, I could hop in on this. No problem. Humbled extremely fast.

Even compound was like 60 pounds. I mean, like, Brandon, you got humblebites. It's harder than you think. Like, it doesn't sound like a lot of weight, but when it's an awkward movement that you're not used to doing. Right. Which I was actually going to ask as a follow-up to that, what kind of exercises in the gym do you do specifically for archery that would help with that muscle group?

um so the best thing realistically is you got to understand too the style is very different than olympic style archery olympic style archery is usually like you see them and they come in like this and they activate the back but it's not really doing much the best thing is like a wide grip pull up

Because what you're actually doing is you're coming in and you're dropping down. And so it's basically pushing, pulling, and dropping. And so that drop motion right there, that's the hardest part because that's when you get from like 24 inches, 26 to like 32. So that's when most of the weight stacks. And so wide grip pull-ups is something that's really going to get you to be able to drop in that extra little movement right there. So that and weighted wide grip pull-ups,

But I also have like a little weight in there. Wide grip pull ups. Yeah. I'm not in that. It's called body weight. Yeah. So those are actually going to be the most useful for that type of archery. But if you're just like doing standard, you know, archery with modern is 40, 45 pounds. It's going to be right in here just like this. It's not going to take the whole body into account. Hmm.

And that's, you were like, oh, I'll start off at 80, 60. What were you starting off at? My first bow, I tried to buy 100 pounds, but I think it ended up being closer to like 70 or 80 once I got my 109 pounder. Because then I got my 135 pounder. I don't get a full draw on it, so it's probably like 120. But that one, it's like if I don't train on it, like I can't just hop back in on the heaviest weight. Like I have to essentially restack my way up. What were you cracking up at?

Huh? What were you cracking up at a second ago? My mom just texted me. Yeah. We've all met my dad, yeah? Yeah. See? I'm just gonna read this text message. Your dad took Nana and I to Plaza Mexico, the local Mexican restaurant. Do we want to bleep that just in case that's a local place that... Oh, shit, there's like five of them. So, the cook was whistling non-stop.

Your dad asked the waiter if he could start whistling in English. Your dad has a Mexican stepdaughter-in-law. Your kids are Mexican. Like the bad subtitles on a fucking Netflix thing. Whistles in Spanish. Whistles in Spanish.

I checked my phone, that took me by surprise. Dash is like, "Uh, my real estate career's gone." What does that server say? They're just like, "Oh yes, certainly sir," and walk away. Wait, what? My dad's been going there three times a week for 15 years. They know he's joking. It's still just fucking funny.

Can you talk in English, please? Brandon, I actually meant to ask yesterday. What's the next video you're working on? Do you have any gun builds coming up? Did I talk about any of the stuff I got from Rock Island? No. I don't think so. I kind of had a weekend. That sounds expensive. Yeah. I was a little fast and loose. I bought a M79 thumper.

Like the little 40-millimeter? A real one. Oh. It's a 40-mic-mic grenade launcher. Okay. I need subtitles. Subtitles. It's not a stick. I don't get it. It's a stick and a string. As far as I go. I mean, it's kind of a stick. It just has a bigger tube. But yeah, like Vietnam-era 40-millimeter single-shot grenade launcher.

But I got one of those. I picked up the Beretta AR-70. Doing some Metal Gear shit. Because fucking Eli got me an MGS-5. And that's a gun I don't own and I can't have that. So I could not tolerate it. Picked up one of those. So I'm going to be doing... You and I are probably going to work together on a Metal Gear Solid video. You have to incorporate the box. That's exciting. Oh, no. I have to incorporate the box. Because we've got some exotic shit that...

I mean like the Barrett M82A2. There's like 12 of those in the world. And you have one. Is that the shoulder one? Yeah. I think I have the one that's... I'm not sure about this part, but I think I have the one that's ever gone... The only one that's ever gone to commercial sale. Like...

Yeah, because one's in a prop house and the rest are still nobody knows. I'm sure the military kept some of them. Barrett, I think, kept one or two. One of them ended up in fucking Norway somehow, their military. And MGS5, no idea, or MGS4, Hideo picked that. No idea how he picked that weapon platform for that game. Everyone's like, no clue. Highly specific? Because we have that. We're looking for a PSG-1. I have the Stinger missile launcher. The Barrett .50 Cal Sniper rifle. The tube of it. I know.

I know. Missile launcher. And then you know, that one sits on your shoulder like an RPG, like a bazooka and you shoot it that way instead of being a sniper rifle. The military sits like it wraps on your shoulder. Yeah. Like the magazine sits right here and there's a buttstock that rests on your shoulder and you hold it and it like sits on your shoulder like a bazooka, but it's a 50 Cal. Yeah. Jamie, pull that shit up. It's actually pretty smart if you think about it for carrying around. It's way cooler to shoot. Yeah. That right there.

Oh my lord. Yeah, that's insane. Also terrifying where the action happens though. Yes. That's where I'm afraid of. Believe me, either it's going to work out or you're not going to care. Yeah. Yeah, pretty much. The...

Cause that was the one that Chris Barrett, I posted something where I showed that I had one of those or when I had just picked it up. And he's like, I don't ever use this fucking word, but that's actually a unicorn. He's like, how genuinely, how the fuck did you get that?

Rare fucking weapon. Yeah, so we just got a bunch of stuff from Metal Gear, and the Metal Gear fans are fucking rabid. I had no idea. Yeah, it's a real thing. It's a whole subculture that's very passionate about it.

I joined the military because I know it's not the message of that game. The opposite of that. But I joined because of it. I'm so fucking stoked. And then you got the Volcanic. Oh, yeah, the Volcanic pistol. Picked up one of those. So we're going to try our hand at recreating some of the ammunition for it because it's the rocket ball. It doesn't exist. Unobtainium. I saw Rock Island actually sold a couple years ago. They sold...

like 80 rounds of volcanic ammo. Like this was still like new in box from the 18, like 1855. It's like 20 fucking grand for a box of ammo. Oh my God. Most of which probably doesn't work. It's weird ammo because that's the first, that's the original gyro jet kind of.

Uh, it's, that's kind of a misnomer, but they called it rocket ball. Like it kind of is like that. It really was a very unique take, um, actually from the company that later became, uh, Smith and Wesson. It was some, some, uh, guy, his last name was Smith and you had Dan Wesson and, uh, they worked together on the, uh, the volcanic project and getting that made. Uh, but basically it was a predecessor to, uh, self-contained cartridges.

So basically they took like, if you can imagine like a mini ball, like one of those projectiles from like the civil war, like black powder, they had one of those, but it was hollowed out in the back where they stored the powder in the bullet and put a primer on the back. So it's kind of like a, a self-contained cartridge with no, no brass. Was there still rifling?

Yeah, I believe so. No shit. If you used Babbel, you would. Babbel's conversation-based techniques teaches you useful words and phrases to get you speaking quickly about the things you actually talk about in the real world. With lessons handcrafted by over 200 language experts and voiced by real native speakers, Babbel is like having a private tutor in your pocket.

Start speaking with Babbel today. Get up to 55% off your Babbel subscription right now at babbel.com slash Spotify. Spelled B-A-B-B-E-L dot com slash Spotify. Rules and restrictions may apply. I said that very confidently. I'm not sure, but I think so. Maybe so. I don't know. The only problem is they were notoriously underpowered. Like to the fact that there was a story, I don't know if it's true, but a guy tried to fucking kill himself with one of them and failed.

because it's like a 100 grain projectile, I think. Which is not that it sneezes at. But I think it was going like 260 feet per second. A paintball? Play Airsoft with that thing, dude. Straight up. That's shitty Airsoft speed. Call your hits! When me and Ethan went out to that Renaissance Festival, I didn't realize how I guess they would adjust cannon fire.

I just always assumed that they would lift the cannon up and drop the cannon down. And the dudes that were running, they're like, no, there's a mathematician on the back that was loading the next round. And he would actually on the fly, like, we need this one to go further. And he would pack more black powder into the charge. And they would literally cut fuses. Yeah. This dude is just on the fly determining things.

like for when the ball is going to explode on an explosive round and how much powder to put in for how far they want it to go. Just on the fly. Some dude doing math equations, multiple cannons back to back to back. Yeah. Like each, each cannon had a dude doing all the math and they're like, they would just set the cannons up and fire.

And then they didn't move the cannons anymore. Instead, they just repacked the ammunition. So it's like the opposite of what a sniper does now, right? You use match-grade ammunition, so that's the constant, and then you change the scope. They did the opposite. So the actual rifle was the constant. Yeah, the rifle was a constant, and then they just repacked the ammunition on the fly. That's fucking wild.

And they'd have like a chart there in the little carriage where they're like, okay, well, if we need to fire at this many yards, we'll have five seconds of flight time, which means we need to cut a quarter inch off the tip of the fuse so that it explodes over the enemy. Like they were doing a bunch of calculations. It was wild shit. How fast were they at it too? I forget what he said in the video, but it was like alarmingly fast. Like they were firing that cannon like every like 12 seconds.

Yeah, it was multiple rounds per minute at least. That's terrifying warfare too because that is your buddy's there, your buddy's no longer there or his legs are no longer there. It's also nice when the enemy formation is also constant. Stand there! Take it like a fucking man! Line! Touche. You don't need to be that accurate. You're firing at minute of crowd.

Phalanx formation. Not working. Oh my god, they have horses getting to a square. Fuck that shit. I actually just watched Waterloo from 1970. Movie goes hard, dude. Dude, that was so many extras to actually make the squares. They had thousands and thousands of people. So they filmed this in Ukraine during the Soviet Union. They pretty much used all Red Army extras to make this movie. I've never seen this movie before.

so i think from my research it flopped domestically here in the states but now it's like it's kind of still like a cult classic because it's like literally an epic of a movie like they're not going to make a movie like this again with no cgi they had some dummies to play like really far shots like in formation but everyone you see in the shots are usually like real humans not usually they are real humans kind of like lawrence of arabia that kind of scale the epic yeah exactly drowning

It is sick. You'll see the big cavalry charges and all the extras are forming square and

And there's just, it's just movie. It's just beautiful movie. There's no like Hollywood message. There's nothing to it. It's just dudes killing each other. No cultural dialogue. Reenactment of what fucking happened. Yeah, really. You have Napoleon. He's like, I'm going to kill this guy. And you have Lord of the Lone Tanks. Like, I'm going to stop Napoleon. And it's just epic. Epic retelling of the battle that inspired ABBA. Is that what that is? What? Waterloo.

It's a really, really deep cut. I'm sorry. Oh, my God. I'm just happy I'm not the only one that missed it. Chase, put in crickets. I'll see myself. It's a comedic wristband. The formation was cut down by grape shot.

It's like, damn it! There's like 12 guys out there that thought that was funny. Comment below. Three in 12. That was for you. So how does one get into, I guess I don't know if it's competitive, but I mean, you're one of the best in the world at war bows. How do you get into that? Oh, I mean, for me, it was just, I would always read about these historical classes and cultures and things. And in high school, I remember reading about

English archers and how they would do up to 150 pounds. And I'm like, what does that mean? Like I didn't have that in high school. Yeah. Damn. I didn't have an idea as to what that, like that. I just read about it and I'm like, what is that? What does it feel like? And so it kind of became a goal to like, I want to see if I can match what that did. It's the same with like the sling. I read about the Bollier slingers and like the islands of Mallorca, the Spaniards, um,

And I was like, I wonder if I can master a sling. And so it really was just reading about historical, like a craft or skill that people would master and trying to see if I could replicate that over time. And so it was just, it's just always been something that in just drove me to like, I want to see if I can master what man did back in the day, or at least get passable at it.

Way cooler than I learned a yo-yo in 30 days. I'm still on Aaron's team where it's like, you learned that in school? Yes. You're a cooler history teacher. No, no. In the beginning. No, I read about it on my own. Oh, okay. Because I remember I read Lord of the Rings and I was...

like fascinated with Legolas. And then I was like, well, what, like I want to read more about archers. So I just started reading archers on my own and just started like reading about history and the English archers and everything. And you go back to the Welsh and like the archers of Gwent back that predates that. And they had different bows that weren't you, but were still really powerful. So it was just something that I was always like, I want to see if I can match what people did back in the day, if I can measure up to what they could get to. And so that was always, yeah. Huh. That is interesting.

Well, I guess we're all lucky he didn't pick Genghis Khan. I cannot ride a horse and I would be a horrible horse. I wasn't worried about the horse riding. Not with that hair and aesthetic. Wasn't my concern. Master of husbandry. Sir, come. Sir, come. We know what his armor's gonna be. The white knight. Sir, come.

He's like, fuck! You got a little bit of redemption there. Lord Brandon has studied the comedic lines! Holding steady! They keep me around for some reason. Oh my gosh. They haven't been fired yet.

Nick, what do you work on next? I don't even know your next question. Oh, no. I was like, this entire week we haven't had time to ask just those questions yet, which is surprising. That's true. Did I tell the 442nd bit?

On podcast? I don't think I did. I think I told you off camera. I don't recall. Which one was that? I did a video. It should be going up on Wednesday. This podcast will be after that. Yeah. Yeah. So I can tell it. I'm doing a video on the 442nd Infantry Division, which was the American Japanese that volunteered to fight for America anyways, even though a lot of them were being put in internment camps unjustly. And I kind of follow...

Why they put the Japanese in internment camps, what the justification was, why it was messed up. Then I follow the unit all the way through combat. And then each stage of combat kind of has one standout guy that did something incredible.

So I guess the two coolest or slash funniest for me was the whole reason that FDR and the military as a whole decided we're going to put every Japanese person in an internment camp was a Nihao incident. So during the second wave of the attack on Pearl Harbor, they got American planes up in the air and they were dogfighting with the Japanese Zeros. One of the Japanese Zeros got hit in the fuel tank and he didn't have enough fuel to get back to the carrier. So he made the emergency landing on what he thought was an abandoned island called Nihao.

And so he makes this emergency landing, but there's actually 200 Hawaiians that live there. And the Hawaiians don't know that Pearl Harbor happened yet because it's like 90 miles away. So they like trying to help this guy, like treating him like just some dude that crashed a plane. Like, oh yeah, we'll help you. Well, then they find out, you know, within six, eight hours that they had attacked Pearl Harbor. So they throw him in jail. On Nihao, there was two Japanese people that lived there and it was a man and a wife. And the husband decides that he's sympathetic to the cause and he's going to help him escape.

So they spring this guy out of jail and get him a gun. And the Hawaiians obviously try to stop him, but he's already got a gun now. It's Hawaii in 1941. So this Samoan dude, not Samoan, Polynesian, Hawaiian, he goes to stop him. His name's Ben Kanahile. And he gets shot three times.

charging at this Japanese Imperial pilot and makes it to the pilot proceeds to pick him up and throw him into a stone wall and then slit his throat with a hunting knife and survive, which is the most Polynesian shit I've ever heard in my life. Guys, when you leave your dogs at home, do you ever worry that they might find your firearm? Ah!

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Discover a better way to balance security and readiness with Stopbox. Stopbox! Stopbox! Stopbox! Stopbox. And then that ended up being the catalyst of one of the main excuses for, well, we can't trust American Japanese people. We have to put them in termicats because they're all going to side with Japan, which obviously is fucking stupid and horrible. One of the worst things America's ever done. But that was the reasoning for it. How progressive. Yeah. Yeah.

I'm still picturing ragdolling that little dude. Yeah. I picture fucking Dwayne Johnson's character from Moana. Yeah. So like that was cool. And then I kind of like low key follow one character through the whole story. I like give you a little updates on him. And then he comes out being like the main hero at the end, right at the end of World War II when –

The Allied forces break through the German Gothic line, which is like the last main line of defense in Italy. And then Germany ended up surrendering like two weeks later. So they fight all the way through this North Africa, Italy. They're fighting the entire time. They take massive casualties. And he actually, there's a guy named, oh my God, Daniel Inouye.

He ends up getting promoted. At one point he goes in to save the Lost Battalion in World War II. He gets shot in the chest. He carries two silver dollars for luck in his front breast pocket. Caught the bullet, saved his life. So then he goes in on the Gothic line. They get pinned down by three MG42 nests. His whole platoon is pinned down and he's the lieutenant. So he gets up, rushes an MG42 nest with a grenade, throws a grenade into it, gets shot in the stomach.

blows up the first mg42 nest keeps running throws a grenade into the second mg42 nest blows that one up goes in towards the third and he goes to pulls the pen on the grenade winds back and he gets within he's somewhere between five and ten yards from the nest and the germans fire a rocket propelled grenade at him he was so close the grenade didn't have time to arm but just the sheer force of the grenade hits his arm and severs it and it's like dangling by tissue

And his hand is holding a live grenade with no pen in it. And he can't control it anymore. So he collapses and his dudes like stand up to go run towards them. And he turns back and he's yelling, no, stay back. Cause he's worried his hand's going to relax and let go of that grenade and kill everybody.

So he laying down with missing an arm, takes his left hand, prize a live grenade out, and then ends up throwing it left-handed and single-handed into this last German machine gun nest, blows it up, gets up with his Thompson, kills at least one German. Some say some accounts set as high as many as three. Cause so between one and three more Germans with a Thompson submachine gun, one handed, then he gets shot in the leg and falls down unconscious. Yeah.

And when he wakes up, his guys are looking down at him and his dudes, like all the accounts are, he said, and I quote, nobody called off the war as they're dragging him back to the rear. And he had so much morphine in the field that they couldn't give him any more morphine without basically stopping his heart, dropping his oxygen levels too low. It would kill him. And they didn't have anesthesia. So then he got his arm amputated in the field.

And then he goes on to survive and he always wanted to be a surgeon, but he can't be a surgeon with one arm. So he got into politics. He was a Hawaiian territorial senator that was instrumental in Hawaii becoming a state. And then he served as Hawaii's state senator until 2012 when he passed away. What a fucking G. Yeah. Cody had a fever today.

Yeah! That's what it's at. I hear these stories just like, "Man, I'm a bitch." Yeah. Yeah. Kurt's like, "Why am I getting shit on? I'm not even here today!" Again, just... Holy shit, dude. Host Roman Haymakers and hosts today.

Oh, my God. The worst part about that whole story is I didn't have any food to eat while you told it. You know, I usually have when I watch your video. It's a little popcorn. Oh, man. You're either a food YouTuber or you're a shower YouTuber. I watch YouTube in the shower in the mornings when I'm getting ready. Mm.

Oh, you were a shitter YouTuber. Oh, really? Yeah. That's actually a high honor. Victory. That's precious time. I don't know if your shower was up there. I think Connor mentioned that at some point where he said, you know, I just want you to know you're a TV YouTuber. Dang, dude. That's a high honor. Wait to watch it on the big screen. Big screen.

Jesus, dude, running at three in the third one, arm gets blown off and you're like, fuck it, I'll grab it with my other non-dominant arm. This throw is going to look gay. And then it will land. Nick specified with just one hand as opposed to two hands. He's like, ah! He threw his hand. It's like a potato smasher. It's like a potato smasher.

What was that? I don't know. My luck, the inertia fucks up. Tosses the hand, grenade drops. And then he grabbed a Tommy gun with his left hand. He picked his Thompson back up and killed at least one, maybe three more Germans. Do you know what he was shot in the stomach with?

I would assume an MG42. Or an 8mm Mauser. I imagine getting hit in the stomach with an 8mm Mauser would just fold you over, but if you're still going, that's insane. Because you hear about that. You see that in war shows. You hear about it. It's like, were they getting shot by MP40s or 8mm Mausers? And they shrug off those wounds pretty much. Because that's a hefty fucking round. It's a big old round.

It's like a .30-06, but it's wider. You know, if you think if you got shot in an MG42, you think it would have been, like, zipped up? So you think it was like a Kar98 if it was an 8mm Mauser, or if you think it was an MP40? Well, then he would have been zipped up, too, if it was an MP40, in theory.

Unless one round caught it, you know. I didn't get to ask him. Did you get to ask him? No, I didn't. You did some deep research? I passed away my senior year of high school. Dang. Getting shot was badass enough. That was one of the Japanese dudes? Yeah, that was one of 18,000. So out of the 442nd, so they kind of put them through in phases. They sent out a battalion as an experiment, the 100th Infantry Battalion.

And then after those guys were performing really well, because they were dedicated as fuck. They were trying to prove themselves to everybody. So then they made an entire regiment and they sent the 442nd Absorbed the 100th Battalion. It became the 3rd Battalion in the 442nd Regiment. And it's the most decorated military unit in US history for that size and that tenure.

They had, off the top of my head, I think it was 21 Medals of Honor. Holy shit, dude. Out of, wait, 1,200 people? 18,000. 18,000 is still fucking wild. 18,000 in two years. 21 Medals of Honor. They had somewhere between 300 and 600 Purple Hearts. Like, a ridiculous amount of Bronze Stars. A ridiculous amount of Distinguished Service Crosses. And then there was...

I think it was 9,486 Purple Hearts. When they went in to save the Lost Battalion, the dude that was the division commander of the 36th Infantry out of Texas, he'd never been in combat, and they put him in charge of a whole division. And he was just being aggressive because he wanted to be the first guy to break into Germany. And he had a group of Texans push way farther out than they should have, and they got completely surrounded by an entire division.

And they kept sending in battalions to try to break through the line to rescue these guys, and nobody could. So they called up the 442nd because they had been beating ass at this point. They sent in the 442nd trying to save. 211 Texans were surrounded. They sent in the 442nd. They fought for three days and broke through the line. And they ended up taking a—

I think it was 800 plus casualties to save 211 dudes, but they punched through and got them. And correct me if I'm wrong, but I, if I remember this story correctly, I think didn't later on, they made all of them honorary Texans. They're all honorary Texans because of it. Yeah. It's kind of neat.

That's dope as shit. Do you think they were confused when a bunch of Japanese guys saved them? Bro, that's like the coolest part of the story is like they know the first Japanese guy that like came because it was foggy and like smoke from all the battle. I forget his name. He was a private first class, but he's a point man in I company or K company. I or K company. And like there's an account of. Did they have an L company? The Texan. They probably did. They had so many fucking dudes out there. God damn it, Eli. Era.

So like this – there's this account of like 18, 19-year-old Texan kid just like manning his gun on his defensive perimeter and fucking Japanese dude in American uniform comes walking through the smoke and they like have this moment where they like lock eyes and like Texan kid's like lip starts quivering as his eyes start tearing up like, oh shit, I'm saved. And this Japanese 442nd infantry dude just looks at him and is like –

You want to smoke? It just offers him a cigarette. I was like, that's the coolest thing on the planet. No shit. That's awesome. Dang. Dude, those stories are wild. Dude, the shit some of those dudes did is insane. I have so much respect to any of those soldiers. I look at anything that happened in GWAT and you're like, that doesn't hold a candle. I mean, a lot of respect to everything that happened in GWAT, but that stuff is fucking wild because there is none of the modern tech. Radios suck. You're out there in the middle of nowhere. Armor's not really a thing.

At the.

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What's crazy to me, too, is that, like, just that generation was just totally built different. Because you do these crazy things for, you know, three, four fucking years. Kill more people than pancreatic cancer. And then come home and spend 40 years as a fucking postal worker. The crazy part for me... Never mention it. The crazy part for me is, like, we all grew up watching Save It Private Ryan. Like, we understood...

what they were doing like if me and you went to do that I'm not saying we'd do it better because we wouldn't but we would at least have an idea of what we were getting involved with right imagine the perspective of you've never seen Saving Private Ryan I'm sorry you want how many to jump out of how many planes at the same time you only know like a hundred people think you're in a small town like Max and that is all the people you've ever met known you maybe shot a 22 to hunt that is your life yeah welcome to team deathmatch with 800

Half of them are trying to kill you and then you're dropped the airborne is the one that I can't wrap my head around like Normandy and that shit's wild But then airborne units getting lost behind somewhere in Germany France wherever and you're like well What's crazy to me to shoot an asthma? Yeah, there's a little bit of you know perspective. I

This is 40 years. You're dropping in Normandy out of a fucking plane, static line jumping into enemy territory under gunfire. 40 fucking years after the Wright brothers did the first flight. When was the parachute created? The first parachute? Leonardo da Vinci? I think it was way before the plane. Speed up, speed up, speed up.

Was it? Yes. Yeah. Like, I think like... Oh, the Eiffel Tower guy did it. Because they tried and he died. Someone jumped off the Eiffel Tower. He's like, this is how you do a parachute and it did not work. Well, you can't... Yeah, literally. You can't win them all. I know.

Sacrifices must be made. The airborne union got 50 cents extra or a dollar 50. What was it? They got extra pay. I don't know how much it was at the time. I know they got jump pay though. It was like why a lot of dudes volunteered for it, but it was like $2 and 50 cents. It was double the pay, but it was not that much when you look at it now. And then you're deploying. How low were those entries?

I want to say, so we looked this up at one point. I'll verify. But I want to say that due to obviously exigent circumstances, they had to do some of those jumps that like, I want to say the lowest was like 300 feet, which is not safe. No. Oh God, open, open, open. And then it's dragging. The crazy part is like... 250. 250.

was the lowest recorded on D-Day. I'm good. How long, dude, your parachute takes at least 100 feet to open? To start, yeah. You're literally looking at the ground like, uh, fuck. Rounds are kicking up around you. Oh, no, I'm sorry. Due to some altimeter errors, some aircraft dropping troops at 175 feet. Oof.

That's the fucking building in San Antonio. You might as well fucking bungee jump with a knife and cut it in the right time. Yeah. I mean, at that point, fuck the parachute. Imagine looking out and they're like, go, go, go. You jump in and... It's already right there. You're touching the top of a tree. Fuck. Oh, man. Yeah, the Tower of the Americas, what you're thinking of in San Antonio, is 750 feet.

Bro. You're dropping a quarter of that. That's fucking wild. Yeah, fuck that. That is where so much respect to those. And when you land, it's not over. You've just started the match. Right, right. Oh, that's the worst part. Hell of a loadin'.

Oh, no. Well, I can't wait for that one. I'll watch the fuck out of that one. Jesus. Pretty good. What are your guys' do you do any history at all? Yeah, I mean, the history, a lot of stuff is like

older history like I do like the hoplite warfare like the hoplite heresy where it's like the orthodox versus the heretical view where as far as how they engaged in the battle right you're saying a lot of words so not many of us are going finally because the gun talk is making me insecure so I'm trying to make like some actual words like what are you guys talking about I don't get it like Captain America I understood that reference laughter laughter laughter

So the idea was that like the Orthodox view is that the phalanx, which is like the Spartan, like when you think Greek warfare, you have large shields and it literally is just a pushing match, right? So the idea is that they would go in and you would push, push, push, and you would get some casualties that way. The heretical view is more that they would be

line like kind of like a deep like you'd have a small like 20 foot or 30 foot line where the lines they would kind of Set up and then people would like to challenges in there and then they would engage and push and kill and back off because you're You get so exhausted so quickly, right? You can't a challenge So like people would literally like run out there like the bravest ones would literally just start killing each other like think of it like playing dodgeball back in the day, right you have some people that hang out in the back and

And some people get up to the front to actually engage. So literally there was like individual skirmishes in the front where people are like, because you hear all the stories, the heroical stories of the people fighting in single combat. It's literally because you had some dudes that were like the most brazen or brave would kind of come out and they would meet each other and they would just engage. And then the large bodies would move in and then they would disengage and you'd have some javelins thrown and you'd have a sling go through there and then they would engage again. So it was like a tide of battle.

Right? It wasn't just a single push. It would tide in and out and you'd have to recover, move back, and then the most aggressive ones would stay out and still engage or try to kill some stragglers or grab some prisoners and then they would kind of come back to their lines. I've always wanted to like...

have a skit where i recreate the movie 300 but from the perspective of the guy at the very back of the phalanx what's going on just what the fuck is going on there for an hour and a half and then they die you're faking it yeah yeah yeah oh you're lifting yeah how's everybody doing up there

Ooh, I'm starting to be able to see the enemy, so not well. Getting closer. That's when the battles are like, you pour water on yourself, you're like... I imagine you just get bored. What's your profession? Oh, you're just like, oh, I gotta check my profession. But I can't imagine...

Can you imagine the psychological warfare that would be that you're literally like, if you guys ever played football or any sport, you see a new team, you don't know who these dudes are, and you're like, all right. And you see him, I'm going to challenge that guy, I'm going to fight this guy, but it's like, that guy's going to murder me and I can see his eyeballs. I can't imagine being shoulder to shoulder with someone that's literally trying to kill you in lines.

Like that to me is just a different type of thinking altogether where it's just, I bet the shit talking was awesome. I believe it. This close to someone who's trying to murder you. And what are you going to say to them? Stabbing someone with a, your mother joke. You bring up an interesting point where it's like playing sports. You don't know these guys, but it's like, I remember playing football and I would play the same guys. Cause like you, you go up throughout the year. Yeah.

You're playing the same guys every year. So imagine like these Greek city-states warring. They like see the same guys over and over again. I've been meaning to kill this guy! Oh, Mykonos, you son of a bitch! This is my second time trying to kill Dipshiticles. I'm gonna get you this time. To your point though, as far as like, you know, not knowing and whatnot, we have so much information.

like modern warfare. Yeah. Realistically, it's like, all right, I've seen your fucking parade on Instagram. Like, I know what you guys are. You're using this kind of tank. You're using this, whatever. Back in the day, you're just a peasant from God knows where. And like, what the fuck is an elephant? Yeah. It's like, yeah, literally. Yeah. Where did, where did they get that from? Yeah. I remember reading something where it was like, they were doing like the physical requirements for like the, the levy soldiers. They had to like jump,

They would space out spears and they would jump over the spears. They're like, good job. Here you go. You're set. You're done. Wait, do what? They would have the spears just laid out on the ground like hopscotch almost. And it's like they hop through it. And it's like, you can do it. Good job. You're set to go. There's your military service. What's the elementary school thing where you get tested when you're a little kid? Oh, the presidential? Yeah. To see if you get a spear or not? No, I don't think it was that. I don't think it was that strict. I think it was more like that. That's way too. Yeah.

That's a high bar. That's a high bar. The president's standard mountaineering school. We got underfed peasants here. They would jump over spears to see if you could throw them or not. No, no, no. It was literally just like they would set up a very little obstacle course in order for you to be qualified to like

some sort of service like the landers landers i forget that's the one they had they were like these they were really good mercenaries but like they had the guys used as vihender which are those massive swords with like the curves that were like pike breakers and they had the pikemen so like the pikemen to be in it like they had much less strict physical conditions because really you're just like if you're a pikeman you're not engaging much in there you just got 20 foot sphere and you're like all right stay back you know

Wait, is this, did we jump to medieval Europe? Or renaissance Europe? Yeah, I'm going all over the place. Are you talking about the Landshake Pikeman? Yeah, the Landshake. God damn, I know shit. Everything before 1776 was a mistake. No, no. Once gunpowder came in. Damn you, sir! Gunpowder ruined everything. So when would they use, like... There's a lot of third world countries that agree with this.

Oh, I didn't laugh. I didn't laugh. I didn't laugh. Take it back. Play that laugh and rewind. Man, life was rad before a gunpoint. That shit blows. Dang China man had to make fireworks.

Man, just working in trades and just seeing new tools and new technologies come out to make the job easier and how much pushback and resistance and shit-talking there was from that older generation of tradesmen that are like, you'd have older dudes that would talk shit if you liked using an impact instead of a drill.

What? Just like people do not like changing and they'll just shit talk anything new that's more efficient and they'll like make fun of you for it. Like, oh, you got soft hands, you're using power tools, shit like that 24-7. I can't imagine the shit talking. Oh, you're going to use that magic black powder stuff that just goes broke. Pansy ass. Why don't you stab a guy in the face like a man? Like, you know how much money I spent on this armor? You're gay. I'm cooler than you.

Because wasn't there like that kind of pushback? I might be making this up entirely. But when they transitioned from bows to crossbows. So there was like, I mean, you can talk on this too, but really it was not necessarily a big pushback. Oh shit, Edmund's here.

No, it was more like there was an idea that they said the Pope made crossbows illegal and things like that because it was too powerful and stuff like that. But really, there wasn't a big gap between the performance of it. It was just the amount of training required that was so minimal that you could arm people so quickly and have a similar result.

But overall, it would be outpaced and outperformed by a good war bow or a longbow on almost all counts. Really? Except for the fact that it was easier to mass produce, easier to train. Like a bow, there was an old saying, like you want a good longbowman, train, start with the grandfather. So it's literally like a generational training to be able to functionally use a weapon of war that can actually do damage downrange. As opposed to a crossbow, which had very similar one-to-ones.

But it would just take a weekend. You know, you get someone to crossbones like, all right, let's do it. I didn't have to change your bone density on your right. Right. Yeah. Are you good at it? So it's like the problem. It's like war. But you're like, yeah, he walks. No. Next. Yes. He can jump over the spears. This guy's good.

Welcome back Brad Pitt!

Dude, crossbows, even those, you're just drawing back with the giant metal lever thing. I mean, there's a few different. He's got a goat's foot. They got, like, levers. They got bicycle cranks. Yeah, like the windlass, which is, like, that's a 1,200-pound crossbow, which is, like, you know, it's going to be steel, but steel is horribly inefficient as, like, to generate momentum. 1,200-pound crossbow, steel is not going to transfer as well as if you had, like, a well-made composite beam.

bow so if like you have the bows of the eastern empire ottoman bows turkish bows that are composite that have like tendons and horse and things that take like a year to make they have those those can go they've had shots up to like 700 meters that's like the world record i think for an actual bow it's a composite bow with a with a recurve and that's like the world record but of course meters yeah i know it's legit yeah

So you can look it up. But they have – it's very – it's made for flight. It's more sport than warfare because the arrows are light. They're not going to do damage on the way down. They're small. I wouldn't want to get hit by a man. True. But it's more like – Don't even worry about it. Yeah.

700 meters fucking insane yeah i don't think i want to be hit by anything that has the ability to go 700 more meters to god that is fucking wild did you get into any sword stuff no i do a lot of that like i'm not like trying i haven't done hema or anything like that that's like this sword style everything and so i do a lot more stuff with like

training weapons. So I use a lot of Warhammers, War Picks, Blunt-type damage because I feel like that's just like a lot of archers would have like an axe or a Warhammer or a Maul or things like that. So it's not as much finesse, but you just freaking nail some armor response. I've got a sniper rifle and a shotgun. Yeah. Literally went

If we're sponsoring anything we got to get this guy some fucking ballistic dummy heads because I want to see what a fucking battle a Warhammer does to that

That would be so satisfying. I just did one recently. Get ballistic high speed out here. Oh, dude. I've been doing some of the – I do a lot of the bone, right? I'll buy like beef ribs or femurs and things like that to test it out because it's just like that's – the ballistic dummies are expensive. But even that with just like the war hammers and things, I had one just recently where I had layered. I had brigandine armor, which is 1.5 millimeter chain mail, and I had a padded gamut. And then I had beef ribs behind it. And I just got a new war axe, basically a battle axe.

And so it's Orlean's battle axe. And so I took it with a really sharp pointed point on the back, and it went through everything and split the bone. It actually hit it right in the actual rib. It went through and in. So it was through three layers of armor in through the actual bone, which is way thicker than human, and in the back. And I was like, that's brutal. God damn. I wish there was a way. I know that this would be logistically...

kind of difficult but I wish there was a way to get with ballistic dummy labs and get them to do like a 50% larger head so you could do the David and Goliath shot oh I know yeah that would be gnarly yeah alright guys we got the Nephilim bust here yeah

It's an abomination from fallen angels to the world of my son. Giants! Have you seen the... It looks like competitive paintball, but it's archery with super bludgeoned arrows. Have you ever done that? No, I've never done that. I don't want to see you do that. Yeah, I've never done that. It's like paintball with the inflatable obstacles and stuff. It's one of those, but they have little bows and arrows. It's like a nerf ball on it. So you're playing...

Nerf arrows. It's like going like probably like it's like I went to a pickup game with my war bow and then they called the police. I've already killed three people. I gotta go. I gotta go catch a plane back home. I'll see you guys later. It was nice to meet you. We're gonna go kiss him goodbye. That titty's not gonna pop itself. Goodbye.

I want caffeine. My slingers. Give me the Cretan archers. That sounds like a slur. Yeah, you made that a slur. Everyone's like, yo, what's up, slingers? You gotta go the soft day. He's like, slingers. Slingers moved into the neighborhood. You can't culturally appropriate the slingers. Hey.

You want some merch that will do good? You're welcome. Dude. If you have a Slingers t-shirt, you're riding in a Nepal. Dude. You're like, they're 300 out the window. It's like, all my Slingers hate Goliath. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm here now, I'm committed. I've thrown in my lot with you bastards.

Well, Nick is gone and now we're going to learn about this because he had, you were on a movie set helping. Yeah. Yeah. So David. Yes. So, um, back in May I actually went to Greece for three weeks because Amazon had the series house of David. And so the stunt coordinator found me on Instagram and he reached out. He's like, Hey, we were making a show and he couldn't talk to me about the time. He's like, would you be interesting in teaching someone how to use a sling? I was like, sure. And he was like,

And then time went by and then I got an email, like, 'cause there's so many, like the short time I had with that little Hollywood thing, there's like assistants, assistant to assistants. Like I never knew who I was talking to. And they're like, "Hey, the producers in Hollywood, can you drive down and meet them?"

to go over what you might be able to do. I'm like, sure. So I drive down to LA and I bring the slings with me and I meet with this producer and we walk down the marina and I show him how it works. I got some rocks and just kind of toss them out there. And then we have lunch together. He's like, yeah, we'd love to have you out. How long can you commit? And I was like, I got two to three weeks max. That's as long as I want to be with my family. I'm not trying to chase a Hollywood dream. I'm not going to be an actor. It depends on how many zeros.

I guess technically. $20? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30? $30?

This is like a hobby passion thing. I don't care about any of that. So they actually flew me out to Greece and I got to, they had the two different departments. One was the stunt studio and that's what they had like, all they see in the movies, the mats and the boxes, right? With the people like they kind of section out where the set's going to be when they actually get there with the boxes and they kind of do the choreography. So I met the stunt crew and they were super cool guys.

And then I met the kid who's playing David Michael. He was a great kid, like young little kid. And so I worked with him for like two, three weeks, just trained him how to use the sling, you know? So that was great. And then I met that big Martin Ford who played Goliath. He's that really big English guy with tats all up on his neck. He's just some big like 6'8 bodybuilder guy. Is he in any other movies?

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He's been in a lot of movies. He plays the villain in a lot of movies, I think. So I was working with him on spear throwing and everything like that because Goliath had spears. So how to get that going. So I do that to Javelin and things like that as well. Here we have a couple different lengths of sling. And so I have a longer one and a shorter one. And so they would carry... The longer one's harder, I'm assuming. The longer one would be able to toss a larger projectile further. Different ranges. Just like anything. You have a longer...

you have a longer sling, you have more centrifugal force. So you can actually move a projectile further. So that's going to be like early mortar fire. So to speak, you can pass a longer rock lead or clay further down the line. So that's going to be longer range. The medium range is a medium sling and a shorter range is for shorter range. And so they carry, they have a waist head and they'd have one in their hands. They carry three different lengths of sling.

um of cord to basically do that and there's even like an old adage because they were so good at the boy slingers like they were basically always mercenaried out like even if they got conquered then the Romans were like all right because they were Carthage first and then Roman beat Cartha and they're like all right you guys are with us now they're like all right cool so they just kind of hopped around as mercenary forces what were they called again the Bollier slingers that sounds like a dope sports team

What size were the projectiles? So the Romans used lead and that was about three ounces of lead. So not super massive, but lead's very dense. So three ounces of lead is about that big. I was like, show me with that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Measurement with Harry. - 3 ounces, of course, of course. - Obviously. - Obviously, yes, yeah, totally. But then you would have larger ones, which would be like eight, like when I sling like eight ounce rocks or something, those are about that big. So that's gonna do massive damage. - That sounds like you're a drug dealer. - I know, yeah. - Talking about QPs. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - He's a real ass slinger. - Now you're committed to it. You gotta carry it forward. - I'm a dude playing dude, this guy's another dude.

The Bobby Airdslinger. And so then I was even – You get half an energy drink in this guy. Oh, good heavens. He's gone off the reservation. I was talking to Brandon too about the different – the Romans would actually drill holes in the lead shot because it would whistle. And so I've done that with some fishing lead. You just – they're fishing weights. Those are about three ounces. You drill a hole in it and you can like half drill or all the way through and it makes this hiss noise like a –

as it goes through and they would use that to keep people in place. So if they had shields, it's not going to go through wood, right? But it's going to keep people pinned down because of that noise flying over. So they would be able to keep people in position as the slingers go. So every Roman legionnaire would carry a sling and they would use those to keep people pinned down so that people wouldn't feel a flank out because they would just say that noise going over your head. Oh, fuck. It's not different than a paintball or anything flying by.

So I speed through like, shit, I don't want to move out because something's flying by. Exactly, yeah. But the holes drilled specifically so it made more noise. Just like totally just suppression. Yes, yeah, exactly. Psychological warfare. Jericho fucking whistles on the German plane, the Stukas. When you get shot at, I mean, you know distance because it's like whistle, it's not cracking. If it's cracking, it's very close. That means it's like, blah!

I need to take cover and concealment. Huge difference in how you react to that. And even that, like, because I've tested it, like, you get wooden shields against it and it makes this god-awful thud when it hits the wood. It's not going through wood, but it's going to be like this really just force reckoning boom, like thunder, thunder.

It was called a knife.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just scoop. A spork. A spork. They found a tool to remove

to remove the lead weights was also good for eating. How would they actually do that? They'd be able to inside so it'd come in and pull it out a little bit. They don't actually have pictures of what it looked like. They just referenced that they had a specific tool to remove the lead from the body when it would actually punch into it. It's like which was the king or prince that had the arrow removed? Henry V.

Yeah, that would actually drill into the arrow and open up to pull it out. They'd have to go through the actual shafts to get it in there. And at that time, it was like, oh, this is extremely... What would be the word? Revolutionary tough to remove. Cutting edge. Yeah, cutting edge to remove this. And then you look at it and you're like, oh, it's so... It didn't even have numbing cream on it. It was just like...

Have you ever had whiskey? Here's some sauce shit that some gypsy lady cooked up for you. Smell it.

So they just scoop them out. Yeah. For those of us who don't know the backstory on that, you said Henry V? Yeah. Was shot in the fucking face. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. It was hit in the face. Because they would like, and I have like, if we do this, if we go big, you know, it's like with the armored combat, you don't realize how much oxygen it deprivates from you with to have a metal over your face because you get a CO2 buildup, right? So that's what all the holes were for.

And so a lot of times during a charge or when they're giving orders, they'd lift up the face plate. So you'd be able to breathe because the early Corinthian design, like the Spartan helmet and the, with the comment is it would actually sit up on the head so you could have it up and it would rest on your head like a hat. And then they created the visor so you could pop it up. And then like those in front, it would give orders of things. You'd pop it up. And then when you did charge, drop it down and go down. But if you're issuing orders or yelling or trying to catch your breath, you'd have to pop that visor up to get your breath.

Because it really does limit the amount of oxygen you can intake when you have something covering the majority of your face. Oh, yeah. There's a gas mask. Everyone knows those. Yeah, yeah. There you go. Yeah. Gas mask run. You're like, yeah, we'll keep it. You just crack it slightly. This sucks dick. Just so your hair is not poisoned because I'd be dead. Hopefully it's not neurotoxin. How about just a little CS gas? It's a smidgen.

So you did that and then what movie trained that individual up? Did you just do three weeks? Yeah, yeah. I just did three weeks with him and the kid was great. He took it very seriously. He'd go down to the beach and practice. He was committed to it. And so he got really good in that short time. I was genuinely impressed. So I would do it up like if you've ever boxed. You have combinations one, two, four, six, right? Same like that. So it's like one, two. So I'd call out different sling styles.

basically have a big bag of tennis balls when we were in there and i'd call out like one and two and six and he would have different styles he would run through so as he got really good at it we would run through those different styles what are the different like not to go too in the weeds no different styles because like i i just assume it's all pretty similar right no so there's quite a few different ones and a lot of it was kind of you had to create like we had styles and then

flashy styles like Hollywood, right? You think of like, you know, like the jumping throws and like the spinning throws. And so we had a couple flashy ones, which was like when you spin around and move like that. If you talk about that Spaniard, the guy who does the, who dinged that, who dinged that metal pot,

Right, yeah. Because he does that spin style. He flips around and does that style to get a lot more momentum, but it looks very cinematic. Great for the views. Yes. So the standard one is just like you don't spin it too much. And if you bring it over your head, it's really just to rest.

And then you explode out on that last one. So it's like, it's just to keep the, the energy keeps the rock in the sling and you explode and you sling it down there. And so there's a couple different ones, a figure eight where you kind of come around back and up and sling it that way. You can kind of come behind and then come flip it over the front and then go that way.

And so there's quite a few different kinds and you can have one where you rest it at the side and then when you're ready, you explode out over the top of the head. So those are the ones we were working on. So like there's a quick shot, which is just one. It's just you don't even rotate it. You just snap it over the top. And that's usually the most accurate because you don't have to like when you're spinning it, you really have to calculate in your head when the release point is.

to kind of figure out, okay, I'm letting go of it here as opposed to just like a snap where it's a lot easier to kind of get it down the line. So those are good for closer range, but if you want more momentum or inertia, you generally need to come over. And then that last one, you're really going to open up and extend it out so you have as much momentum as possible. So it's extending your arm like by double, right? So just think of a pitcher. It's extending the length of their arm by two. So you have that extra momentum for a heavier projectile to go just 120 yards.

Real quick, real quick. I feel like we're a group of kids that just got old and we're listening to the best kid in the group that can throw the rocks the hardest. It's that caveman instinct. Like I just said right before we came, or I came on, I was like, dude, I bet, because you were saying people carried around a pouch full of the stones. Yes. And I was like, I bet the day before battle, just finding the perfect stones had to have

You're like, I'm gonna fucking kill someone. You're showing those off to your friends. You're like, you're like snagging a stone. Yo, check this one out. Oh, dude, you see Brad Stone? Dude, Brad Stone's so fucking cool, he came with a hole. This looks like it would fuck up an Ottoman. Turns out rock fights when you're a kid is just blood memory from being a sling.

Do you have a bedside sling? Maybe it is our word. I have my concealed carry sling. Yeah, dude, your bedside sling. Someone breaks in, you're like, babe, watch. Babe? Shit. My wife is entirely unamused by all of my nerdiness. She's like, you are such a nerd. I'm like, yes, you married me. You made this bed.

Don't worry, it bounces out with your looks. You can get away with it. I was thinking about this earlier. I'm like, he looks like the gay love child of me and John Lovell. That's accurate. Sorry, John. Collateral. For sword combat, do you just go for like the...

What is your favorite style? So you were talking about like the huge was so wonders if I under five? Massive like you grab like six foot. Yeah, and they'd have like the ricotta which is like an unsharpened port So you can grab on the top part there as well so you can have that leverage But those are like momentum weapons - yeah, and they're like Pike Busters so you have those point those were meant to break up the pikes because you have those 20-foot pikes and those could chop through that wood to kind of close that distance when you're basically trying to get in that warfare and

But for me, I mean, like I said, I'm not trained in swords. So I just like in archers too, that a lot of times it would be like a maul or a war hammer or a pick because that's going to do way better against plate because it has that blunt damage. And so as armor got better in like the 15th, 16th century, right? The swords would be much narrower to kind of punch through.

mail and then you'd have the rondelle dagger which is what's going to do the finishing move because it would engage in a clench they'd go down and that's going to be the thing that's going to get those weak points because you can't you can't thrust through well-made plate a lot of people that and that's the thing uh we've talked about it it's weapons went to like a scimitar or a uh what is the fencer uh saber yeah

I kept googling how to be a gay and I ended up getting an advertisement for some gay French sword.

But I just love how their armor got better, so they're just like, "Mmm, brute force, parry this, asshole." Literally, concussive force is what's gonna do it. So I think that's... It's like either you were an extremely skilled fencer, or you were just like brute force damage, or you get three dudes, you take a knight down, and you hit the weak points. And that's how most of them went down, like in Agincourt.

It's like it wasn't the archers that did it. It would take them off of their horses. It would take the horses out of the equation to disrupt the charge. And then the knights lose like 50% of their efficiency if they're not mounted because they're much slower. You lost me on that a little bit. How are they taking out the horses? So basically the reason why the war bow was so efficient was the long distance. And for a charge to work well, a cavalry charge, it needs to be elbow to elbow, knee to knee. It needs to be a close-knit formation for a charge to have good impact damage.

And so if you hit horses from a distance, it's going to spook the horses. The horses may die or fall and it's going to cause them to fall over. It's going to cause an escalation of the charge to be disrupted.

And so when the knights lose the ability to be on their horse, then the archers and the forces are going to have the advantage because they're going to be able to swarm. Just think of anything. It's like three people versus one dude in armor. If they're in the melee and the craziness, they can pin them down. And then they're going to have the daggers to basically go through the eyes, the neck, the underarms, where the chain mail is to really be able to finish that person off. So it's like brutal, brutal, right? Like just think of going out with like four dudes on top of you, like not the eye enough.

Saturday night. Oh no, my chain mail's open back there. Help me, Step Pikeman. Welcome to Unsubscribe, brother. Trying to buy comebacks. Step Pikeman is...

I was mentally prepared, but I wasn't prepared. Even just pragmatically, I was thinking it's a very funny mental image where let's say you got a knight full armor doing cavalry charge. How would you rather fight in full armor? Fresh and ready to go or having just been knocked off a horse and had to run 700 yards in full armor? Yeah.

Yeah, that would be brutal. And I think the thing that would work would be the French were really committed to the horse, the cavalry. But if you had, they would separate it. You had hard targets and soft targets. So hard targets were armored knights and soft targets were the horses because even they had the catch in the front. So the horses had that catch, which is usually sometimes they had mail or things, but they weren't completely armored so you could hit the flanks.

But if you had hard targets advancing, even with the bow, if they had their helmet down and they were moving, they would still be able to move forward relatively well because it's not going to go through armor, especially at an arc. You're going to have to really hit those weak points. But it was a volume fire. So if you think of 5,000 archers and they could do 10 to 12 a minute,

right? And they would do that. So you'd have possibly 10,000 arrows in the air at a time. Jeez. Because you think about the volley. So it's like an arrow flight at like 300 yards is probably like 10 seconds. So you could have two sets. Oh, shit. That's blinding out the sun. Right. Literally, it's like 10,000 at a time and there would be another round behind it. So you're firing the second arrow before the first one.

and land. Right, right. Exactly. That's crazy. Yeah. And it's not like, again, it's not a small arrow. It's like it's 1500 grain, 1600 grain, massive thing, half inch shaft that's just really coming down. So it really only a fraction of need to hit the part, hit the actual weak spot for it to actually be usable to disrupt or cause mental exhaustion as you're moving forward. What is she or are we talking about?

So this was like 14th, 15th century. And then at the 16th century, the archers, you know, they got a little more armor and things. But then after that, then gunpowder came around. And so the armor started to change where plate became less usable. And also...

you lost so many skilled archers that you weren't able to replenish those ranks. The same with the slinger, right? Because it's a skilled, it's like a skilled craft. And so as you lose those people, you can't replenish them. And that's the great thing about a crossbow. We talked about this when we did the crossbow video, how it's like crossbow, dead man dies. Like here, take this. Yeah. Right. And they can do it. But if you have a heavy duty war bow, you pass the guy next to you. He's like, what am I going to do with this? Right? Yeah. You can't put it on. Why don't you be drawing the fucking bow? Yeah.

I become the human ballista. Connor's like, I got you, bro. Guess I'm gonna die. Guess we're swinging it. This is now my melee mode. Damn you, Sam.

may not have the skill to shoot an arrow but i can hit you with a stick yeah but isn't that where kind of where like pikeman essentially i mean obviously it was a stoplight cavalry but it's way easier to just give a fucking medieval peasant a sharpened stick oh yeah i mean spears were like the king they are considered the king of weapons they existed like the earliest the earliest reference of a spear was like the clacton spear i think and that was like 400 000 bce and that was just

It was just 400,000. Yes. 400,000. Yeah. And so when we switched from monkeys to slightly smarter, we just got fired. Human covenant war. Yeah. Okay. But it was literally just the sharpen. They would harden it. My bad. Sorry, guys.

You could harden the wood by heating it, right? So they would make it and so it would be like a stronger stiff, but they wouldn't have like stone or anything. But that was like, they have a record of that as being an actual offensive or hunting weapon at that time. And it basically went all the way up until like the 18th, 19th century, right? Spears were still common, like halberds were still things that were very much in use today.

at that time and it took a long time for it to phase out even bayonets are like an extension of a spear you know that's the halberds they just started spearing like oh let's just add yes hard point at the end so you can swing it yes through armor or sharp points or uh hooks to bring somebody up yeah you've all heard the expression that every weapon is either a stick or a rock

Over the course of all human history, guns just throw rocks faster than a sling can. We just got that skill tree upgraded. New, faster rocks! Infomercials back in the day. 100 million dead! Johnson & Johnson, a family company.

See you at my radio. So what is your favorite? Is it during...

David Goliath era your favorite style of combat or formations? I think the coolest to me is that time because like I was telling you earlier, there was a moment where the slings would outrange the bows at the time. The slinger could throw 300-400 meters and at that time... Dude, you gotta make a shirt. You gotta make a slinger shirt, bro. I'm struggling with Connor. Ben Giggling made me get caught.

The teacher's gonna have to separate us. Y'all need a bunch of punk-ass slings! Listen up to the real OG sling over here! Quit yanking a man's sling and listen up! I'm just gonna

okay go on your favorite era yeah ranging bows of the time yeah so and so it was like um the idea was that they there was a thought that even like there wasn't good there wasn't good wood on the islands in order to make a bow so they had to be proficient in the sling and there's like old anecdotal stories that like even a youth at a young age

Like the kids before they could eat their, they would put a piece of bread up on a stick and before they could eat the bread, they had to hit it with a stone, right? So it literally was something that was taught from youth to adulthood. And so even me training for a long time is like a pale representation of the power and the accuracy they had. And the Greeks would set it up on the beach. They'd have these rings set up at different varying distances and they have to make it and thread through that ring with the sling.

And so it's really just so cool because it's just a rope and a rock, right? Like the ingenuity of people where it's like, I'm going to take a string and a rock and I'm going to make it something that can murk you from 120 yards away, right? Which is insane because in my mind, coming from the firearm space... Yeah.

There's no sights. Right. You're just like, fuck it. That seems right. Right, right. Yeah. That's absurd. And of all the things I've learned, like the amount of stones that I've thrown is absurd. Like I'd have to tape up my fingers with athletic tape because you get blistered all

over right and so just being able to get it to go in a slight direction of where i wanted to go took ages just to figure out i want to go straight not left not right just like i want to hit it 10 by 10 target that's like 20 yards away took forever to figure out just on when to release it and you're you're saying so people will do 120 yards and they could do that

Right. Accurately. Right. That's, I mean, again, like a nine millimeter pistol. You could, most people aren't hitting 120 yards. No, God, no. Yeah. And again, it's when you get into the weeds of the history, it's like you hear a lot of things and it's like, okay, maybe they did that. But really most anyone can hit an army.

from 120 to 200 yards away. That's the thing. - When they're shoulder to shoulder. Again, minute of crowd. - Yeah, exactly. - That way. - Yeah, and even the war bows, like even in medieval Europe, they had hunting bows and war bows. War bow is like a modern term, but it's anything over 80 pounds.

And so they wouldn't hunt with something like that because to be able to aim well with something that's 160 pounds, like your body is under such duress that you can hit a target with it, but anyone can hit an army at that distance as opposed to like a pinpoint accurate shot. You need time to be able to really settle in and aim.

But your body is basically wanting to let go the moment you get it back. So it's much harder to aim those at like a pinpoint spot when it's that heavy of a draw weight as opposed to just lobbing it downrange to just disrupt an army. I'm glad you brought that up. I was actually about to ask. Do you do any sort of bow hunting? No, I've never actually bow hunted. Really? No. Yeah. Too easy? No.

I mean, no offense by this, but you look like the kind of guy who would walk out into the forest and hand feed baby deer. I would get what he said. No offense by this, you look like the guy that would order edamame for the table. Wait, I got this, I got this.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. What an oddly specific gig. The ladies love it. Yes. With some soy bacon. I didn't mean it like that. You seem like a kind, gentle human being. You look like a Disney princess. Everybody's fucking sucking you off and then I say something nice and now I'm fucking down. Why are you so gay? Why are you being so nice to the super hot chat? Are you gay?

Tune in for the Pepperbox exclusive gangbang. The Disney princess. Oh, man. Birds are following him around.

You need to go deer hunt with a sling. That's a good piece of content. That is a lot of use. Unless the deer suffers. I think that's a very good idea. Just smack a fucking deer at my point.

everyone's laughing and it's flailing for life as like all the bones just break i did a ballistic dummy with the sling once and i hit it um like on the orbital bone and i you know ballistic dummies i feel like you walk over your giant rock

Pikeman! It was like, dude, the outdoor boys just popped up today. It's like my final video I'll never forget of outdoor boys. The fish? Yeah, he's like, did you find a rock kid? He's like, no, dad. It cuts to him just punching the fish in the head four times.

Don't take this the wrong way. You shouldn't have to type a sling of that when cave in a deer skull. Oh shit, Edmund's here. So you orbital crushed a mannequin's head. Yeah, but so the ballistic dummy, it broke like, you know, all the bones. But the crazy thing was all the way to the back of the skull, it just...

everything just like it was is like paste right and so I couldn't imagine like pre you know surgery whatever if bones splinter like that it's like if you don't die it's not an instant death right that is like a long horrible mushy skull for like a couple days where you're just

floundering and so it's brutal there is actually an old medical procedure they used to do for stuff like that it was called prayer yeah I know we'll get the priest in here but no it would be sage yeah brain mush laughter

Oh, shit. Todd is a hero. Say something, Todd. Jesus. Todd, can I have your farm filled? That's legally binding. He takes all of it and gives it to his wife. He has all heard it. Connor, open hand, open hand.

Unplugging medieval life support and just bashing it against the rock. Like Eli's gonna do with this deer. Sam which is gonna beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Oh my gosh. Yes, I'm a surgeon. I make $160,000 a year. I brought my one tool.

Well, I think on that note, we can move to the after show because that's a comedy goal. That was fun. I really enjoyed that. Thank you guys so much for coming on. Real quick, where do we find you at, bro? Dash Rendar on YouTube. Spell it out. D-A-S-H-R-E-N-D-A-R. After my favorite Star Wars character because I'm a huge nerd. Oh, that's what we'll talk about in the after show. Okay. Holy shit, Admin's here. Where do we find you?

You can find me at administrative results, but don't come looking. And what's your new one? Bureau files. You can come looking. And King Trout, where do we find you? On the internet. King Trout.

Thank you guys for coming to the unsubscribe podcast. Today I was joined by Eli Double Tap, King Trout, briefly Nick the Fat Electrician, Dash, Administrative Results, and myself, Donut Operator. Thank you. Stay tuned for the after show.

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