How I Ruined A Funeral!
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- Okay, I was at a funeral when I was 11. - Uh-huh. - And I wanted to see if they kept the teeth in the corpse. - My God. - No. Safe side. - So I pulled, I just grabbed the lip and pulled it down. - No! - No! - It was a funeral! - Yeah. - Wait, the real question is, was there teeth?

No questions. No questions. I'm starving, guys. That's why girls don't want you. We all are, man. What was that? Uh-oh. What kind of shade are you throwing? What did she say? She said, that's why girls don't want you. What's up, guys? Welcome to another episode of the LOL Podcast. You guys really got to start doing this. Okay. Come on. Why don't we do like the YMCA? Yeah.

Oh, that's kind of good. Like L, but like look, L-O-L. Like it looks like the word. Okay. All right, let's get into it. All right, we're going to start off with a truth and a lie game. If you guys have never heard of it, pretty much we're going to go around. We're going to say a truth and we're going to say a lie. And then we'll have to vote on which one's the truth and which one's the lie. All right, Kate, you want to start? Not really. Yeah. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Oh, shoot. Are we going like Kate, me, like are we saying all of them and then voting? Or are we just focusing on her first? So, my first... Oh, my. My first statement. Oh, gosh. When you first got your Tesla...

I did hit something in it. Wait, what? This game is actually crazy. I don't know if she's lying or telling the truth. I know. I didn't know either. I hit something in it and I never told you. That's a lie. No. Wait, can we ask, what did you hit? She would have told you. What did you hit? No, no, no, no. No asking questions. No further info. Okay. My next fact, my next fact. Hmm. Um,

When I was a young teenager, I had a very severe shoplifting problem. True. Definitely true. I can see you with some sticky hands. Now I can see her just stealing lip gloss everywhere she goes. Oh my gosh. This is hard. So was she a criminal? She's a klepto. Was I a criminal or a liar?

criminal for sure. Okay. Return that to Ulta or Sephora, wherever you stole it. I'm going to say that the shoplift means a lie. No, it's true. That's 100% true. Watch me be right. Sorry. You don't know her like I do. She's a thief. Am I? Yeah. I just know that you stole things. Matt, have you ever seen me steal anything in my life? I don't need to to know that you're a thief. Okay, let me ask. Would you steal something?

Now? Don't ask questions. Just a general question. Oh. Now? As like a grown... Would you steal something? Would you... You hear us actually phrase that like now? Would I steal something now? Now? What do you think? Maybe back then. All right, let's vote. Maverick? She's a thief. She's... All right. Klepto. I think that the lie is you're a thief. Oh, shoot. So you think I hit something in Mav's car and didn't tell him? Yes, yes. No way she did that.

So you think the truth is she's a liar? So truth is you hit somebody in the mouse car and lie is you. So I'm the tiebreaker. Yeah. You know she's a klepto. What does that mean? Yeah. Like she's a shoplifter. Anyways. She'd have to steal like little things that like they have a little watch. It's like.

It doesn't even matter. Like the monkey off that movie? Yes. You guys know what movie I'm talking about? Where he teaches the monkey to steal everything? Yeah. Anyways, what do you think? You're a klepto. Okay. Are we right? Am I supposed to say that? I'm using that word correctly, right guys? Yeah, now you're supposed to say that. A kleptomaniac? Yeah, the truth. A kleptomaniac? The truth? Yeah, you're a kleptomaniac. The truth is that when I was like 13, 14, I did shoplifting. I knew it! I knew it! Y'all, it was bad. I literally... Wait, how

Wait, how often did you steal? No, I'm talking like, so me and my best friend, when we were like 13, 14, we wanted to go shopping, but we didn't have jobs. And so we realized that like, hey, if you take some clothes, there's a solution. This was so bad. And I'm literally

I'm literally like, I get a job when you could steal. No, I literally, I didn't have anybody, me and my friend together. We were two idiots. Like, and we realized, Oh, Hey, if you just like take something into the dressing room and put it on under your clothes and walk out of the store, it belongs to you. It's free. It's free. Yeah. And then it got bad. All my other friends knew that I was like doing it and they would want something. So they'd have me like take something for them so that they didn't have to do it. Yeah. So yeah, I did. Um,

And you're right, that was the old me. That was like, did you ever get caught? So yeah, this one time, my best friend and I, we were the only people that did it. Nobody else would do it with us. We were in a Dillard's and we were like, it was like going bowling. Like we couldn't get them to come. No, no, literally. I'm talking. We did this every weekend. Every weekend. Ask your cousin every single weekend. Wait, you stole every weekend? Every single week. No, that was like our outing was like, we were going to the model shoplift.

Oh my God. Yeah, it's really bad. So anyways, this one time I'm in Dillard's, right? And we're like grabbing everything we can get our sticky fingers on. And we're going to go to the dressing room, put on about 10 pounds of clothes and walk out of the store. We've been like doing this very for like regularly. So then we are obviously- That's insane. All right guys, meet up at the same spot as usual. Yeah. No, we're like at, we're like in the higher end, like clothes and we're taking stuff. Like we were like taking like Calvin Klein too and all that. We're like-

13, 14. Obviously, we don't have money for Calvin Klein and stuff like that. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, we had, like, literally arms full of just clothes. That's crazy. And one of the workers, like, knew what we were doing. And so she called security. And we, like, saw security walk in. And they were following us around the store. So we literally just dropped everything and left. That's why at Walmart, that's the only makeup aisle that's locked up. Yeah. No facts. Because of people like you. No, I'm honestly, I'm like.

I'm like, I am very, I do not condone shoplifting. Don't do it. It's not good. But I was broke. So it was okay. I don't care. Don't shoplift. It's not good. I was very fortunate to not get caught. I mean, maybe, no, actually I should have gotten caught. I should have gotten caught. Yes.

I needed to get caught so that I could get like a slap across the face and like someone be like, hey, like you're not supposed to steal. But I didn't get caught, but you will. All right. I want to hear Mav's truth and lie because he said. No, no, no. We're going this way. No, you said yours is good. That's why I'm going last. Okay. No, can we vote on him to go? No, it's your turn.

Just go. It's not that deep. Okay. Two truths and a lie, Cash. Actually, none of y'all know the answer to this. So this is great. I thought a long time about my truth and a lie. Yep. As y'all know, it took me a long time to think of it. Yep. Oh, wait. Don't say that.

I almost said my truth. Okay. I already kissed a guy. So now you're going to say your truth. Huh? I almost wrote that down. I know you have. He's kissed multiple guys. Whoa. Wait, don't make that face. No, no, no. I actually was going to write that down. I kissed a guy as my truth. But then I was like, oh, wait, they already know that. Yeah.

Yeah. But it wasn't voluntarily. Okay? This guy, he's a bodybuilder. No, multiple. You've kissed multiple guys. So you wanted to kiss him? No. Okay, one of them was playing chicken. No, you don't kiss multiple guys and say it was all non-voluntarily. No. I've never accidentally kissed a man. You want to? No. Wait, what? Oh my gosh. Okay. Tell your truth in a lie. Okay, okay.

Wait, can I defend myself on the kiss story? Yeah. Real quick. You have 30 seconds. We were playing chicken. I'll just leave it there. We were playing chicken and I won. Well, I guess we both won. Actually, we both lost actually in real life. It was a win-lose situation. Okay. So number one is. Why am I like nervous? Number one is I was at a funeral when I was like 11. Oh no.

Yeah, that's not a good opening sentence. That's not a good way to start this. Something turned off over there. Oh, the light turned off. Yeah. Okay, I was at a funeral when I was 11. And I wanted to see if they kept the teeth in the corpse. My God. No. Say psych. So I just grabbed the lid and pulled it down. No. No. Wait, the real question is, was there teeth?

No questions. I'm not answering who's funeral was. You'll have to find out for yourself. Next fact, Cash. There's no way you did not tell me that. That's so fake. He would do that. He would do that though. Have you guys ever poached the body though?

Well, I did it with you once. Yeah, you did it with me. This guy died and we had a funeral. We were like nine, eight and nine. And me and Mal were like, poke, poke, poke. I mean, at my grandma's funeral, I like grabbed her hand and I was like, oh. No, yeah. Same with my great grandma. I like touched her forehead. Open caskets are like the weirdest thing that we normalize. Yeah. No, anyways, wait. No, no, no. Continue with the others. That's my first one. My second one is, is me and all my buddies were out.

And one of my buddies, or well, we're not out. We were at his house. One of my buddies put glitter in the other one's drink, like a good amount of glitter. And I didn't tell him and he drank it and he drank the whole thing. He didn't notice. Is he dead? No.

No, he's alive, but he drank the whole thing. That's funny. Imagine he's peeing later. He's like, what's going on? Why is there glitter coming out of my pee? That's crazy. Okay. That would throw me off. My pee was shining, glistening, sparkling. Okay, here's the thing. Like red and blue, you're like, what's going on? Here's the thing. My pee looked like the 4th of July. As I think,

That the first statement was so astronomically wild, I don't think you could make that up and lie about it. Like, who comes up with that? I don't want any glitter in your buddy's drink. And before this, he was thinking for a while about a lie, so I'm like... Plot twists, they're both lies. Yeah, yeah. Oh, is one of them true? Is one of them actually true? Yeah, one of them.

It's a truth and a lie, Kate. But you're cash. You would like put two lies just to... Or maybe two truths. Okay. Okay. I'm going to go with... I got to say, I think... Oh my God, I don't know. Michael, which one is it? The teeth or the piss? Okay, your conversation. You said it's the first one. Wait, but is it... Is it the lie?

I think the lie is the first statement. I think that your friend did drink some glitter and you didn't tell him. So you think the truth is the glitter? Yeah, I think the truth is glitter. I can see that you have to know about the teeth. I think the teeth is true. Okay, you're a tiebreaker. I'm going to say the teeth is true too. Really? Tell me the teeth is true. It's the teeth. Let go!

Two for two, baby! Two for two! We're not gonna say that. Where are the teeth in the corpse? I don't remember. Oh, of course you did. I'm gonna have to check next time. I knew you touched the teeth. I knew it. It was bad. I don't recommend it. And the sad part is I don't remember if they were there or not.

That's the whole reason you did it. You gotta go to a funeral soon, man. No, you don't. That's so sad. Oh. Your turn, girl. Anyways, okay. Okay, so basically my first fact is that I...

Okay, hold on. Okay, okay. So, so, so. No, no, you can't say the first fact. I need to put on my poker face. Okay. Well, okay, but don't say the first truth. Just say. Don't be like, the truth is. The truth is, no. So basically, my first fact or statement, whatever. Okay, this is the truth? Yes, yes, of course.

Well, y'all don't know. Okay, this is awkward. Okay, okay. So the first statement is that I jumped out of my 15-foot window in the upstairs. I did the same thing. No, so I jumped out of my window with my bed sheets. I did the same thing. She did the same thing. Okay, we're like family, basically. Your window's pretty high. Y'all watching Rapunzel or something? Yes, yes. What?

I watched Rapunzel. And then I was like, that's your truth. I'm going. I don't even have to get a second. Okay. So wait, so wait, but so the next, the next truth is that is that, um, I, in my house, there's a big chandelier and I hung from it.

and I was- Did you play Sia's Chandelier? No, no, I should have done that. Did you listen to Miley Cyrus? Probably, probably. I can't remember. No, but I, I- What? Like, the wrecking ball thing. Like,

I want to swing. That's what she said. Oh, okay. Okay, anyways. Oh, sorry. I was on my stairs and I was like standing on top of them and I grabbed the chandelier and I sat on top of it and then I fell straight down and I broke the chandelier. So those are my two things. Okay, I'm going with the first one is the truth. The second one is a lie. Yeah, the first one is the truth. First one.

Okay, yeah, it is. I found this chandelier one because I put so much detail into it. How old were you? How old was I? It was like a year ago. What? No, girl, I was eight. Okay. On to the next one. All right, Mav. So for this one, two truths and a lie. No. No, one truth, one lie. Oh, one truth, one lie. Okay. Did you come up with two lies? No. One truth, one lie. Okay.

I'm 6'3". And I have blue eyes. We'll just leave that there. He's got blue eyes. He has green eyes, right? No, I have a real one. I just forgot what it was. What? Yeah. I thought you were being serious. I was like, uh...

Your first statement. So the real one. Okay. One, one truth, one lie. Yeah. Um, I can bench press for 50. No, no, come on. And, uh, I'm in love with your wife. Somebody get this guy out of here.

Call the police. Oh my God. Okay, no, I actually have a real one. I do. Keep going. These are funny. No, keep going. Let him cook. No, no, I got real ones. No, make me laugh. Okay, real one. I kissed a girl last night. What? Yo? Yo?

Sorry, mouth. Bro really got sick. She threw that microphone. Okay, I kissed a girl last night. Or I secretly listened to Taylor Swift. Oh, you secretly listened to Taylor Swift. You did not kiss anybody last night? Yeah, not with that riz I've been seeing lately. What are you talking about? I just had so much riz the other day. Okay, Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift. Yeah, it's Taylor Swift. I really like Taylor Swift. Okay, I will... What's your favorite... Yo! No, no, wait. No, no, no. Hold on, Ty. Listen.

I, I, I, yeah. Explain to the ladies that I do have some Riz. Wait, hold that thought though because I want to know what that was. I will give Mav credit after I have dogged this man about not having Riz. The other day we were at a restaurant and I was like, he, first of all, we walked in and it's just- And I said it loud where she could hear it. Yeah, it's just all female waitresses and hostess and everything. They were a lot of cute ones. And they're all like young. And-

Matt turns as soon as we walk in. We're the only people at the host. We've never been there. It's just her, her and us. It's quiet. She hears him clearly. He turns around and goes, I like this restaurant. And we were like, yo, was it Hooters or something? No, no. And I started busting up laughing. Anyways, we sit down. I was like, Matt, go talk to her. He goes, okay. And he gets up and there's three of them there. And I don't know what he said, but he had all three of them laughing and giggling and everything. And I was like, hmm.

That's pretty good. That's pretty good. So I'll say his Riz level has definitely gained since then. But what were you going to say? So Mav had mentioned Taylor Swift. And you listening to Taylor is amazing. I appreciate that. However, Cash, you know...

was always like, oh my gosh, Taylor Swift, not into it, right? A couple weeks ago, he was underneath our jet skis. Oh my gosh. Our jet skis had broken this day, so he was like, oh, I'm going to take a look, see if it's anything I can fix. I was like, okay, I'll go get you dinner. That's funny, you thought you could fix it. What were you looking at? You're like, oh, this is what the bottom of the jet ski looks like. The next day, we took it to the shop and dropped a couple hundred. I think the thing is,

broken with that thing. Yeah, so I go in and get him dinner. Yeah, I did. I did end up taking it to the shop. I come back and he's like under the jet ski like working. See that? Doing what? He's like, he's like poking. No, no, I was, I was just like shaking it. I was fixing it. Homie is singing his heart out to Enchanted by Taylor Swift. Okay, that's a good song. He was like, I was enchanted to me.

But he's working on a jet ski. Like what man is listening to Enchanted under a jet ski? I had to balance my steroid level with my hormones. Wait, steroid, no. Testosterone. Testosterone. I had to balance my testosterone level with my hormone levels. Okay. Estrogen. Estrogen. Oh my gosh. You guys get the point. No wonder you dropped out of school early. I had no idea what you were trying to say. You're lucky she was here. She's my translator, bro. I

She's like, you mean testosterone? You mean estrogen? People in our comments of our last podcast, someone was like, I feel so bad. They make fun of him. I was like, anybody ever say, Hey, maybe we shouldn't make fun of him.

No, I've never thought of that. Nope. Okay, that's nice. Because you make fun of everyone else. Yeah, you sure do. Name one time I can get you to make fun of someone right now. Watch this. He's ignoring it. What's your opinion on your wife? Honest opinion of your wife. Honest opinion of your wife. She's not here. Don't worry. She's not here. She can't hear you. It's just me and you, buddy. What if I put a wall up? Yeah, can you plug your ears? Oh.

I can't hear nothing. You think she's going to plug in them? I can't hear nothing. Honest opinion? Yeah. I just want to move on. I just want to move on. No, no, I'm kidding. I don't know what to say. Can we move on now? Sure.

This says a lot about you. You could at least say something. And don't hate on me for Taylor Swift. I bought you Taylor Swift tickets. No, I'm not hating. Everyone knows how expensive those are. Babe, listen. You listening to Taylor Swift actually made me so happy. I was like, does it sound like it? Also, not only did I pay for Taylor Swift tickets, on the way to Taylor Swift, we're late. And she's like, hurry, hurry. We can't be late to Taylor.

And I got pulled over and got a ticket. So it made it even more expensive. Oh, yeah. Yep. Well, I think she worked it off. Speaking of which, have you done my driver course? Cash, don't say that on a podcast. Well, I'm not doing it. It's a driver course. It's defensive driving. I think it's okay for him to say it. Yes, Cash is completing his defensive.

Defensive drivers. Yes, I am. He is doing it himself. He is not having Kate do it for him. That would be really bad. Okay, like actually, that's like not good to say. No, it's fine. I think it's fine. It's fine. Our neighbor's a cop. Oh my gosh, y'all. He's the chief too. I know him. We got this. We got these new neighbors this last week, right? And we go outside to meet them.

um, like we're talking to the husband and the wife and they have a couple of kids like close to our age and stuff. And we get in the truck to go get some food. And no, this was Matt's idea. Matt looks at me and he knows I'll do it if he says it. Yeah. And Matt goes, cash, you won't, you won't show him your police siren, which is obviously illegal. He has like a PA system and a train horn. So I have cop sirens on my car. Um,

I can talk outside of it. Oh, a Tesla? Is it a Tesla? No, it's a truck. No, it's like an actual cop car. It's a truck. It's like a PA system. Oh my God. Yeah. And I got a train horn and I rolled up to him and I was like, hypothetically, if I was to install a train horn on my car, would that be illegal? And he was like, oh,

No, not necessarily. You just can't really use it. And I was like, oh, okay, good to know. I mean, I probably won't get one, but you know. Oh my God. Then I was like, what about like a police siren? He was like, oh yeah, that's highly illegal. Highly illegal. You can't have those. And I was like, okay, good to know. Good to know. And then I was like, I actually do have the train horn. He's like, really? And he goes, what?

Honk it. It's 9 o'clock at night. It's 9.30 at night, and he lives in this neighborhood, too. He goes, honk it. I was like, are you sure? And he's like, honk it. I was like, okay, just because it's an order, okay? Because you are a cop. It's a lawful order. My parents always told me to listen to cops, so I honked it at 9.30. And he was like, dude, that's cool. And he was like, do you also have a police siren? I was like, no, no, no. Definitely not. And then when we rolled off, I played the police siren. And then...

we rolled off and I'm like, woo, woo, woo, woo. That's crazy. Yeah, well, and then our neighbors posted on the Facebook page, they were like, whoever has the train horn, can you please refrain from blowing it at night? Yeah, and it's pretty awkward because obviously everyone knows who has the train horn. Yeah. It's like the big jacked up truck with all the light bars and the rims and if you look, you can see the horn. Yeah. That's why I said

to comment on it. Yeah, Brooke, you know, please keep it down. But she wouldn't let me. Because listen, I don't know. I don't know how our neighbors feel about us. I don't. Well, the cop likes us. Oh, obviously our new neighbors like us. We're friends with them. Who are they going to call? Speaking of cops, I also hit a firefighter today with my car. Oh,

Oh, but. Nice. Well, no, he was driving a car. I didn't realize you hit a firefighter. Yeah. Yeah. Well, just to be clear, I did not hit him. I hit his car. But you said that. Oh, his car. Yeah. Harper's like, I've been there, done that. Yeah, your truck was pretty messed up. Yeah. Yeah, my truck was messed up today, and it was a very sad ride to the podcast. I would. Why does stuff always happen on me? I would like to point out that. Hold on.

Hold on, pause. He just used the wrong English again. I know. I was hoping you wouldn't notice. I said, why does stuff always happen on me? I know. Why does stuff always happen to me on the way to the podcast? Last time it was the police chase. And then this time I hit someone. Continue, Kate. I would just like to point out that Cash rear-ended somebody in our truck.

And Maverick really- Oh my gosh, she's so proud. And our Chevy. We have a Chevy, we have a truck. I tapped someone and barely cracked the front of the grill. Oh, but I haven't tapped anybody ever. Yeah, but you've tapped about 85 Curbs. Curbs aren't costing us money, but now we got to go through insurance for that. And then you had to file an insurance claim for that. And we lost money. Okay. So. Well, that's actually really- If I'm the worst driver here- It's actually really making me mad that she hasn't hit any- She did! Yeah! When you backed out and hit that car.

You forgot about that. Oh, yeah. At least I was in reverse. Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah, this is actually bad. Yeah, she hit a car, but it was a parts car, which was... Oh, it wasn't even moving? No, okay. That's even worse. No, can I... Listen, I had

I was also 16. I had just gotten my license. And it was 10 o'clock at night. It was so dark in this neighborhood. Can you stop defending yourself? No, I'm telling you what happened. Because remember the cops showed up at my house? Yes. Yeah. So I pulled out. I hit this car. The cops showed up at your house? Yes, I hit this car. And we were on our way to go to a haunted house or something with our friends. And we were running late. So I hit the car. It's like 10 o'clock at night. I was like, I'm going to leave a note when I get back.

And this car has already been hit. Yeah, it was total. It was a bad car. And so I drive off. And about an hour and a half, two hours later, I come back and I leave a note on the person's car. And I never, like, the lady, like, finally calls me to speak. Well, we left. Okay, just to be clear, we didn't leave...

The person that lived there said that car never has moved. Oh, yeah. I was thinking of my best friend. So we were like, okay, we'll just leave a note when we get back. Yeah. So I left the note. And then a couple days later, the lady calls. She doesn't speak very good English. And she's like, can you just send me $100? And I was like, that's suspicious. I'm not doing that. Like, if you want money, like she needed to go through insurance and stuff. Yeah, that's weird. And so anyways, then the cops show up to my house actually a couple days later.

because somebody had watched me hit the car and they watched me drive off. So technically it was a hit and run. And so then the cops showed up and I told him everything and I like showed him like the note I wrote. I showed him pictures of us leaving it there. And I showed him, I told him that the lady had called and he said that they tried to get in contact with her, but they never heard anything. So I didn't, but I wasn't going to just hand her a hundred dollars. So you're a criminal and you do hit and runs. Yeah. You steal and you hit people's cars and run away. You got hit by someone in the car wash.

Oh, yeah. He ran away. Yeah. I was chasing a guy down. This guy. And he was like 80. I'm not even kidding. Poor man. We probably didn't even know he hit you. No, he did. He did.

He did. Listen, we were in the tunnel car wash and you know how you put your car in neutral? I put my car in neutral. Bro put his car in drive. And he hit me in the tunnel and I was like, dang. But you know, we had to wait like a minute because the thing still going. So after I'm hit, I'm just like seeing neon lights wash my car. And then I get out and he's right behind me and I pull off to like the parking spot.

And this bro just drives away. I was like, wait, what? And so I chased him down and I was like, pull over, pull over. And he throws his hands at me and he pulls over. And then, and then I was like, Hey, you hit my car. He goes, wasn't my fault. Okay. Well, it was. And first of all, he didn't even like take to pull over to like, see. And he was like, wasn't my fault. It was the car wash's fault. I was like, uh,

No, I don't think so. But then I checked my car because I didn't have time to check it at the car wash. I checked it and it was fine. So I was just like, whatever, dude, just go. Not like, give me $100 and go. That's so suspicious. Have you ever been in a car accident or anything like that? No, I haven't. I do remember when I was younger, like three years old, I was in my car seat and my mom, we were driving and a guy came out of the bank. He was

Speeding. Wait, you said you remember this? Yes. And you were three? I physically remember this. Like, do y'all remember some things? Yeah. It's like random things that you're like, why do I remember this? I remember what I had for breakfast a week ago, but I remember that, you know? So anyways, like this guy was running out and then we were going like that. And my mom was like, she flipped him off all this. Mom. Oh my gosh. I don't think your mom's going to appreciate that one. I was like...

But yeah, anyways, and I didn't even know what that was. So then I tried it later and then I got in trouble. No, so basically, what do y'all think is under, what are some things that y'all think is overrated? Because I think a lot of things. I know Kate thinks wallpaper's overrated. Oh. Never putting that up in my house. I actually think,

Harper? Nope. Watch your mouth. I mean, I... She was like, I actually see the air bubble. I actually see the few air bubbles, but... Guys, I needed... We needed this backdrop. We were like, we want this. And so the boys were like, well, Kate, this is all you, babe. So I was like... You know what's underrated? Monkeys.

Monkeys are underrated. Just in general. Those are my favorite animals. And I took Kate. I woke up one morning. I said, let's go to the zoo. She said, why? I said, I got to go see the apes. Oh, my God. He took me to the zoo on Tuesday. And she goes, we're going to the zoo on a Tuesday. I said, yeah, it was Valentine's Day. It was Valentine's Day. I said, no. I know you were up on YouTube late that night. Look at that monkey. He's like, tomorrow I'm going to the zoo. I wasn't at the zoo.

on Valentine's Day and I was like we'll call it a date let's go and I get there and she's like you wanna go see the hippo I'm like no I went straight to the gorilla enclosure and I sat there and I just stared at them and I was like they're like humans they are humans and Ryan tried to troll me I'm sitting there looking at the glass cause like nobody's there it's a random Tuesday and I'm sitting there looking at the glass and he's staring at me

And I'm... We're just staring back at and forth at each other, looking into each other's eyes. Yo, Siri's going off. Siri, what do you have to do here? Get off. Go away. Anyways. So, I'm staring at the gorilla. He's looking at me. And then he walks up to the glass.

He walks up to the glass and he hits it and runs off. Yeah, he like punches me out. He goes, bam, runs away. And I jump. I was like, oh. And then he just ran away. Then he looked at me again. I was like, yo, these are not, these are people in costumes. Yo, we sat in front of the like gorilla enclosure for like two hours that day. That's crazy. And then we went and looked at all the other animals and then I came back. Were you bored? No, they were actually so entertaining. It was fun.

- It was honestly, it was a little sad. Like you could tell that they needed more room than what they had. - Yeah. - They had plenty of room. She's trying to hop on the trend. - Not a trend, I felt kind of bad. - Kind of bad, I was like dang. - Free the animals. - Yeah, free the animals. - No, I gotta see them. How am I supposed to see it if it's not here? - Yeah, but I think monkeys are humans. Like they evolved over time. Like don't, I look like a-- - Oh no, she's one of those people. - Don't I look like a monkey?

I mean, I wasn't going to say it. Shut it. I'm asking the ears a little bit, you know? Y'all shut your mouth. It's hard for you to not look like a monkey. She just asked if she looks like a monkey, and we said yeah, and she's like, wow, really? Yeah. No, I mean, sometimes I get offended of the things that I try to say. Anyways, so I feel like a monkey's evolved over time. So you believe in evolution? What does that mean? What you just described. Pretty much like...

love him that's how like how humans like some people believe yeah people believe that god created adam and eve yes and then yeah not monkeys i mean i guess he did later but no no monkeys were monkeys people that believe in evolution what about german monks what about them like german monks like german monkeys isn't that right like yeah what about i don't think there's monkeys in germany adam and

I mean, definitely not. Adam and Eve were not monkeys. But didn't, wasn't Eve made it out of one rib? Yeah. That's so cool. That's okay. I'm just trying to get myself out of this situation. I'm just trying to get myself out of this situation.

I can't. She's like, wow. Wow. That's crazy. If they were monkeys, they 100% would have ate a banana over an apple. That's all I'm saying. True. I mean, what if it was? Okay, I can't be doing this. All right. I can't be putting my word against the Bible, but like, I mean,

I mean, yo, this dog across the street, the cops, they said that's a Satan dog, but it's their own dog. They said it's a spawn of Satan. Yeah. They said that's Satan's dog. We were like, why is your dog Satan? And they said, they said he ate the whole book of Genesis. And then they said, they said he also ate my devotional and a Bible. I was like, no, where are they all going? Yeah. What's the dog?

What the heck is going on? I think Mav ordered food. Brody's left for Uber Eats? Oh, yeah. I saw him. Before this, he was like, yeah, hold on. That's what he was doing? Are you kidding me? No. No way. You cannot eat on the podcast. You smack too much. Yeah, there's no way. No, guys, when Mav eats, he's like...

Yeah, we're on Xbox and he and we're like, all right, guys, we're like, all right, guys, let's play. And he's like, y'all did this right in the middle of lunchtime. No, no, for real. You're not eating. Don't eat like being so for now. You literally you don't know how to eat and not smack your mouth. So you can't. Oh, yeah. Just no, no, no. Take one bite. One bite. Put the ice cream down. It's ice cream. Take a bite. Now give me one.

No, he's like... Guys, it's going to be when we're like mid-conversation. He's going to be like... No, no, no. Please put it away. Smacking is my biggest habit. It won't be bad. It won't be bad. Mav, you can't eat. Okay, I do like mozzarella sticks. Okay. You're my double.

Yeah, you just gotta put it away for five minutes. Okay, you got whipped cream on your lip. Yeah, now you just look dumb. Now you look terrible. Now you look like a monster. I'm starving, guys. That's why girls don't want you. Yeah, we all are, man. What was that? Uh-oh. What kind of shade are you throwing? Wait, what did she say? She said, that's why girls don't want you. That's why we knew the... Hey! That's why we knew your truth in a while. Ow! My leg just locked. Ow! I can't get up, guys. That's what you get for you. My knee does this occasionally. It hasn't done it in months.

My hips do that. Bro's just trying to be different right now. Bro's trying to be different from the crowd. He's trying to distract from the fact that girls... Get out of here. What...

dude can you stop can you like so annoying can you stretch out your leg maybe like get it together it wouldn't open it y'all don't understand the pain that i just went through i went scuba diving and when i went i got a cramp like that it's not a cramp my knee locks oh he's trying to back to you saying throwing shade a lot plenty of girls are interested in me with with whipped cream on your lip no they're not they probably like that a lot actually okay all right that's the

That's the end of the podcast. Okay. All right, guys. Thank you so much for watching. We'll see you next time. If you guys want to see more videos, click right here. Peace.