Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
Joe Mama's so big that when she goes camping, bears hide their food. I know it's supposed to be funny, but I don't really joke about Yo Mama jokes. All we did was change it from Yo Mama to Joe Mama, and now he's all mad. Dude, stop. Mom, Dad, I humbly suggest you save some money and shop Amazon for back-to-school. It's for my growth, meaning my body's growing at an alarming rate. And clothes you buy me this year will be very small very soon.
Plus, the clothes I love today will be out of style tomorrow. But at least your wallet doesn't have to be my fashion victim if you shop low prices for school at Amazon. Hopefully this is helpful. Amazon. Spend less, smile more. You have a problem? Yes. Stop. You can go if you don't want to be here. Matt, are you being serious? Guys, Harper won't tell us what she has in her mouth. What do you got in your mouth? Spit it out. Spit it out. What is that? Just spit it out.
Oh. Oh! That's not gum. Is it paper? I think it might be toilet paper. Harper, you are not eating toilet paper right now. What are you eating? No, is it the stuffing out of the unicorn? I swear if you had the stuffing out of the unicorn again. Oh, is it gum? No, it's my dog's throw up.
No, what is it actually? Gum. Why were you being so weird about it? Well, that was a major letdown. Yeah. So what's the story you need to lead on? I'm not leading on any story. Maverick has some stuff that he thinks is hilarious, but he won't tell us yet. Pop a wheelie. Pop a wheelie. He won't tell us. I can't pop a wheelie. It's got training wheels. Yeah, you can. Come on, sweetheart. Pop a wheelie. You can't pop a wheelie unless you're... I can't move on the bike. Yes, you can.
How would you all like me to move on the bike right now? Pedal. Pedal? I can't pedal. My knees hit this. Oh, I see the issue. Let me pop a wheelie. See this? If I pedaled, my knee would hit this. Okay. That is a problem. Just pull it. Just... Well... I think you should break. Wait, which one's the back? Hold on. What do you think would happen if... Wait, wait. Harper, spin the front tire. Okay. So this is the back one. All right, here we go. That wasn't that bad. Hold on. Wait, wait. I got it. Oh.
That's what I'm scared now. Okay. I'm a little scared. All right. I'm nervous ready What do you think would happen you guys like that? Do you think would happen? No, no, you have to say per se first That's Kate's new favorite thing guys person she loves saying per se well, what do you think would happen per se? Uh-huh if your knees didn't hit the handlebar, what do you think?
Um, what kind of question? What do you think would happen in that situation? It'd probably be a normal bike that I could actually drive. So you think you could pop a wheelie if the handlebars? I pop a wheelie in everything. If it's got two wheels, I practically ride it on one all the time. I'm so good at riding on one wheel. I can ride a unicycle. I'm pretty sure I remember. Let me get this right. You're in front of me.
There's another guy right in front of me riding a motorcycle. We're going down a road. Yeah. I see you pop a wheelie. Uh-huh. And you end up on the ground. What the? When did that happen? That happened. That never happened. And then he's like crying. He's like, oh. What is it like to just make up stories? And he had to ride home.
- That's the makeup couch. They just make up stories. - What? - Bro. - What? - When did this happen? - With that kid, I don't remember his name. We were all out riding out dusting. - And you're popping a wheelie and you got a little too far back.
And you didn't check your braking. Okay. Okay. This did happen. We were on motorcycles. You were on like 35, 40 mile an hour. Yeah. We were on motorcycles on the road. We're popping wheelies and I fell. Okay. Big deal. Whoop-dee-doo. You cried though. I did not cry. And you clearly couldn't ride on one wheel. He's... You know what? People say this happens. They say when people have a big insecurity, they try to push it on to other people and make them look like they have the insecurity. Is that why you call Kate fat? That's what you're...
First of all, I never said that. What? I never said that. I never called her fat. Oh my gosh. One time, we were making board game puns and I said, your life is like the pig game where you stuff it with hamburgers. That's all I ever said. It's been way more than one time. One joke that I regret for the rest of my life. Okay, guys, I've learned. I'm not saying a fat joke anymore.
It's been way more than once. It's been like 15, 16. If anything, I guarantee you this man say more fat jokes than me. You say way more fat jokes. In one of the episodes, you said, Kate got on the scale and it said to be continued. That is not... I never said that. That's what you said. That's what you said. Did I ever say that, Kate? No, you made that up.
- Yeah, see he just makes them all. - I might have made that one up. - Do you see how he was just trying to gaslight? Like I did not make that up until I said you made that up. - But I said the truth, all right? I told the truth. Listen, the truth is you've many, many times
You've uh, you've made fun of Kate's weight. No, and why I think that it's one way It was what we were all naming board game puns and I just said it okay I didn't think I just said it and I think before you speak brother. I still stand by that It's a job. I don't know why everybody just mad at jokes anymore man But no the what we talking about that you were lying about the me falling on the the motorcycle. Oh
And crying about it. Did I cry, Mav? Did I cry? Yeah, you did. No, I did not cry. You want to know who actually cried? And I can call our father for proof. Yeah, you don't hear that one? We were on dirt bikes. We're going through the woods. Mav's trying to keep up with me the entire time in the woods. When I was like 12? No, you were not 12. You were like 16. Congratulations. You were like 16. I was like 13. When you're 12 and you break your foot 10 miles an hour.
10 miles deep in the woods. You were like 16 years old and I was like 13, bro. And we're driving through the woods. 16? I couldn't drive? Are you insane? Motorcycle, the dirt bikes. You could drive. Yes, you could. 16? We're ripping through the woods on the dirt bike on these trails and Matt's trying to follow me but he can't keep up. You know what they say about people that say stuff like this? They say that their insecurities are the reason they're saying things about you. That's what they say about people like you. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You can't steal my online, bro. That's what you're saying about it. Anyways...
He ends up wrecking a couple times like little ones. Projecting. He's projecting his insecurities onto me. That is literally what I just said you're doing. That's what you're doing. I'm explaining why he's projecting his insecurities on me. That's a shame. Anyways, he ends up wrecking and like breaking his bike and his foot hurt or something. And he starts crying, breaking down in the woods. He's crying at 16 years old. He's like, are you insane? He's mad at his bike. He's like kicking his bike. I didn't kick my bike at all. I didn't kick my bike at all.
My foot was broken. I didn't kick my bike. And me and my dad were just sitting there like. Are you insane? No. Me and my dad were sitting there and we were just like. I didn't see him doing that. Yes, he did. He was breaking down his bike. His bike. His dirt bike. He's like, it's your fault.
Why don't you call your dad next? Oh, you want me to call dad? The fact that you're trying to say I kicked the bike when I had a broken foot is insane. Well, just call your dad. Me and my dad were sitting there in the woods just staring at each other. I stand up and I start kicking the bike. That logically makes no sense. Call your dad. Calm down, bro. Every single time we've called the parents, what has happened?
Okay, you want to? Okay. We'll ring him up right now. Ring him up. Ring him up. Actually, your dad don't got time for this. He wiped down the knees. So, Matt's saying he never cried. Let's hear it. Hey, you see this man? Don't you want to support him? Join the LOL Bros. The LOL podcast, but just the bros. It's called LOL Bros. Link in the description. All your viewership brings it AdSense. And then we can get this man some new pants that don't have holes in them. Help a man out.
Go watch LOL Bros and subscribe. No, I wasn't crying. I was pissed. I was very angry. What shot does the speaker come out of? Hey, we're shooting an episode right now of the podcast. When me and Mav were... When we were all on the dirt bikes in the woods that day and Mav wrecked, did he cry?
Um, yeah, a little. No, I did not. Was I kicking the bike screaming? No. He cried because he was so mad. I was angry. That he wasn't able to jump that jump without wrecking and stuff. How old was he? How old do you think he was? 14. Okay, that's in the middle of what we said. Wait, wait, wait. He said 12, I said 16. But was he kicking the bike? Oh, was he kicking the bike after he, like, out of anger?
I don't remember him kicking the bike, but he was very upset and he did cry a little. I did not cry. Now you was riding through the woods like a crazy maniac about to hit trees and kill yourself. Yeah, but I didn't. No, you didn't. And that's why we didn't go riding anymore and I sold the bikes. Yeah, he did have to sell the bikes after that. That's crazy. All right, well, thank you.
So, so I guess both of y'all were kind of lying, uh, no, okay I might have exaggerated like a little but a little you did cry You acted like I was a four-year-old. Huh? You acted like I was a four-year-old You he literally said you cried out of anger. You were so mad. It was frustration You wanna know how mad he was? He had to get on the back of our dirt bikes and we had to drive him back to the car My foot was broken. Oh my gosh. Was it actually broken? Yes, it was fractured
Dude, we need to call him again. Oh my gosh. I literally went to the doctor after that. It wasn't like broken. Did you get it cast? No. He said just wear it. What are you talking about? We went to a doctor. Our doctor operates out of a trailer house. It wasn't a real doctor. No, he's a real doctor. Even when I broke both my feets, legit broke them. He goes...
You got hunting boots? I say, yeah. He goes, just wear them real tight. That's what he said. Instead of a cast, he said, wear your hunting boots real tight. Yeah. That'll fix it. I...
Listen, we lived in a small town, okay? Our doctor operated his office. It was a trailer house. And I just always thought that was normal growing up. I was just like, yeah, that's our doctor's office. I thought it was completely normal. Never even questioned it once. Last time I went to that doctor, I walk in and I'm like waiting for him to come out and get me so he can fix me with whatever problem I had. And I'm waiting and this guy comes in.
With a big old fish hook in his mouth. With like a bobber hanging down. And it's like through his cheek. And he's just standing there. The way he would just stand there. Like, you need something? Doc comes in and he's like...
the pliers he takes him to the back room and just pulls the fish hook straight out the guy's mouth and you just hear you don't really hear screaming the guy's just kind of like because that guy got goes back out the band-aid on walks back out yeah our doctor's solution every time we had a problem we'd be like doctor it hurts if i do like this he'd be like oh don't do that well can you fix it
It's probably a lot harder to fix it. Just not do that. Just don't do whatever that was. Don't do that anymore. Oh, my gosh. And I never questioned about the trailer home thing. Did he live in the house? No, no. But I never questioned that his office was a trailer house until Kate, we started dating, and Kate goes, that's your doctor's office? It's a trailer house, too, behind a truck stop. It's behind a gas station. It's behind this little gas station. It's not a gas station.
It's so bad now that I think about it. It's like, there's the doctor. That's a gas station. No, behind the gas station. Oh, there's the hospital. No, no, it's right there. To get to Doc, all you gotta do is go behind the 7-Eleven, okay? And he'll be right there. You'll see a trailer house. Stitch you up. Not above the door. He'll stitch you up good. No, I just, I still can't get over Maverick crying and then kicking the bike. Right? That didn't happen. No, it didn't happen. I have a feeling it did because I feel like you've
That's adorable you think that. No, no, and then you're like, no, no. I feel like Nav's a little mad. I feel like he's kind of mad too. I'm mad? I think you're a little mad. Don't start kicking things, Maverick. Nav, are you mad? He's going to pull this trick. That's what he pulled on the bike. Bro. He was sitting down just pulling the little sibling kick at the bike. At the bike. Okay. He's like. Look at him. He's mad, bro. I see the anger. Maverick.
I don't like lies. Deep breaths in. I don't like lies. Deep breaths out. He's actually getting mad. Deep breaths in. He's actually getting mad. Deep breaths out. That's crazy. Why are you taking breaths like that? What a crybaby you are. No, what a crybaby.
That reminds me, when we were little, I used to have bad anger issues. Very bad. You think you did? Matt was kicking the bike. Well, that's the funny part. Once we got older, our anger issues switched. Yeah, again, we called the parents about this, and they said that never happened. Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?
Oh my gosh. Matt, you had anger issues for a minute. What are you talking about? You didn't even live with us. No, but I was around you enough to know. This was recent. You lost in the last year. Oh my gosh, are you insane? What? We literally called mom and dad on the podcast about literally recent. No, no, no. This wouldn't be mom and dad. Homie, this is not not mom and dad. Can we play it
I don't know where that clip is. We call mom and dad they say this is not a kid. Oh my gosh You won't even listen bro. This was like in between 2020 and like 2023 you didn't live with mom and dad then yeah How would they know it was when you were oh my good girlfriend that we were all like, oh my gosh He is so angry all the time now because I'm sorry 2020 I
pretty sure it wasn't one specific girlfriend it was even the next one too like you think yeah you're insane no i mean it was definitely the girlfriends because once you stopped having girlfriends you stopped being angry real it's not existing y'all are trying to gaslight me in the face of this right now you know how many fights i can say that you started and started cash you can't say that when you start the fight and then what you this is what he does he's like listen i cut your hand off
But you're the one with anger issues because you got mad at me. I can hit easy ones right now. When you flipped me in the chair up here. You kicked me. You literally kicked me in the back. When I was trying to borrow your Adidas pants and you flipped out. Yeah. No, they were mine and you said they're yours. Or whatever it was. You flipped out. No, but you were like about to hit him. It took.
It takes both of us to get into a fight about that. You were screaming at me. I'm screaming at you. Wait, wait, wait. When you got really mad and so you started punching the window. Yeah, that fight. That one was earlier in our lives. But yeah, when you started punching your own car window to try to get to me. That means, dude, that's bad anger issues if you're beating up your own car. Again, you started it. He kicks his dirt bike. You hit me with the car. He punches his car.
You hit me with the car first. Vehicle always wins. Okay? You're never going to win those fights. Mav versus dirt bike. Airsoft gun versus truck. Airsoft gun. I'm like, dude, I'm just going in the house. You're not shooting me. I'm going in the house. And you go, no, unfortunately, I have the airsoft rifle, so you have to do what I say. And I said, no, I'm going inside. I'm not playing this game. Anyways. And I start to walk in the door, and you're like, ah!
Walk that way. I'm like, no, I'm going in the house. If you take another step, I'm going to shoot you. I'm going to blast you. And I'm like, Matt, we get it. And then you blast me. And then what happens? I get mad. Calm down.
No one's mad right now, bro. This is ridiculous. You're like going on next fight to the next fight. No one's mad, bro. Because over and over again, there's a pattern, bro. No one's mad. There's a pattern. Anyways, what I was trying to say is I used to have anger issues back when I was a kid. He has them now. But... This is a wild thing to say. But when I was a little kid...
all my cousins and everyone would call me uh angry cash no it was either cry baby or it was angry baby i forgot which one it was i forgot which one it was i don't remember that at all you don't remember that every time i get mad no it was something baby but i don't remember what the first word was probably angry but you guys only called me it when i was actually mad and then it just made me more mad you never remember saying that i don't remember that next time you're mad i'll be like angry
Hear that? Next time he's mad, he gets mad a lot. No. That's what she just said. Next time he gets mad. Yeah, probably in like 2029. No, because he's trying to gaslight everyone. This is kind of proving my point. You're mad right now. I'm literally talking in a very calm level. No, but you can just feel the tension. All of us can feel your tension, dog. Listen. It's like the room is separated. It's like there's a line right by Harper and that side of the room is mad. Cash? Joe? Are you mad?
No, no, that corner. I don't know what you see, Matt. I don't know, Matt. There's just a little bubble right here. Me personally, I'm really happy. Look at it. He's trying to be nice. No, but legit, like, it does bother me when you tell, like, millions of people. Harper, would you like to move to this side of the room? Like, there's millions of people watching, and then you say lies? Like, that's kind of crazy. I didn't say any lies, bro. I can feel you getting more mad. It's kind of crazy. Yeah. All right.
I might say some lies about you. That's all I'm saying. We're gonna start doing that. Matt, just calm down. Remember the exercises you've learned. In. Come on, do it with me, Matt. In and out. He's crying. How are you feeling now? Do you still feel mad? No, I'm fine. I'm fine. You look like an Angry Bird character. He does. He looks like the red one. Yeah, you look like the red Angry Bird.
no but i mean definitely as a kid you had more anger issues but as we got older we both i don't like not like had anger issues like none of us were like angry but like that's absurd with no like but with each other like me and you could just make each other extremely mad yeah but like you were always the one hitting punching slapping did you not just hit me in the back of the head punching the car that was you hit me in the back i was sitting in this pink chair we're playing video games matt turns around
grabs the bottom of the chair and just yeets it backwards. Why do you start in the middle of the story, bro? And he yeets it backwards. And then I hit him in the back of the head. And then I hit you in the back of the head. He's getting mad. He's getting mad. You kicked me. You kicked me. I flipped your chair. Then you hit me in the back of the head. You skipped the first part. Kate was going to say something. What were you going to say? Yeah, let's skip it. Bro. What? Why is he actually mad? I'm not mad. Yeah, let's skip it.
I'm not mad. Not even Harper can tell you're mad. I'm not mad at all. She's a redhead, bro. If I was mad, if I was mad, I would flip that bike. I'd go there, I'd grab your bike. So you agree, you have anger issues. I said if I was mad. You guys at first, you said if I was mad, I'd hit you. That's what I do.
That's anger issues. You can't control your anger. No, I said if I- When I'm angry at you, when I'm angry at you, I just walk away. I'm like, alright, I'm walking away. That's not true. When you're angry at me, that's not true. You literally hit me in the back of the head. You just said you did. After you hit me. Yeah, I only hit you after you hit me. It was self-defense. Wait, is that from his chair, bro? I know, that chair's breaking, and I think it was because Mav yeeted it. Oh, okay. Everything's my fault around here. All the time. Mav, what was that? What was it the other day? Wait, hold on, wait. Some random thing, and it was my fault. What was that?
Oh, I forgot. The chocolate in our white carpet? Oh, yeah. No, not the chocolate in the white carpet. I'm thinking there was liquid across our whole house for some reason. There was this sticky substance. Okay. Which I pointed it out. I found the sticky substance. I left in the morning at like 8 a.m. And I didn't get back until probably like 9, 10 o'clock at night. Like I was gone all day. When I left, the sticky substance was not there. And when I got back. We believe it was not there. Just a question.
pie. Okay, I will say, because I was here for both sides of it. Kate's gone. Me and Matt were home. And Matt was like, what is this stuff all over the floor? We're walking in. I literally saw it in the glimmer in the sun. And I was like, uh-oh, there's a sticky spot on the floor. We got to clean that up before Kate gets home. Whatever that is. And then we start looking and we're like, it's everywhere. Matt was going to start cleaning up. And I said, don't clean it up because Kate's just going to want to re-clean it. And you're not going to clean it right. And Kate's going to want to redo it.
So I was like, so just leave it, and Kate can just do it however she feels is right. Because Kate gets angry if we try to clean stuff. Well, so just re-clean it. I appreciate the effort. It's just nobody can do it to my standard. Wait, what were you going to say? Go ahead, finish the story. And then Kate comes home, and I'm like, Kate, look at all this sticky stuff. And she was like, I can't believe Mav did this. That was just the first thing she said. I was like, whoa, we don't even know what it is yet. Well, I really...
I still believe it was you. I don't know how you did it, but you were the only one who could have done it, Maverick. What does that even mean? That it's just a Maverick thing. You're the only one that has that talent. I was gone the whole time before. I got home from dancing, came straight up the stairs, went to bed, woke up, walked out on the porch, walked back in, and I go, there's sticky stuff all over this house.
So what do you think it was? I think it happened days earlier and we just didn't notice. To this day, we don't know what it was. It was on the floor, the countertops, the barstools. We got like water everywhere and I can't imagine water would do this, but that's the only thing that got everywhere. No, we all want to know what was actually crazy is we have a white carpet downstairs where our couch is. We've already talked about this and it's not true.
I'm skipping this subject. Skip. Skip. I'm skipping it. We already talked about it. It's not true. Joe said we didn't talk about it. We did. I don't know if we did. Do you remember this story? Chocolate in the rug? Yeah. Here's the truth. You thought Maverick put the chocolate but then he was eating M&M's or something. Say something about Mav's anger issues. Yeah.
You know who has real anger issues here? I'll be real. Like, not like, like, wouldn't expect him to, like, hit someone, but if, like, there's a door getting slammed in the house. See him trying to deflect right now? No. Okay, I'll listen. I'll be the median here, all right, because I'm honest. You know what I'm saying? I'm the middle ground. Maverick is the most likely to hit someone. I'll take that.
Really? Yeah, I'll take that. Really? You'll take that? Oh, I agree. Like once I'm mad, it's not that I'm out of control, it's that I don't care. So I'm going to hit you. That's gone out of control. But anyways. No, I'm very much in control. I'm hitting you. Mav is most likely to hit someone or damage your property. I don't really damage property. No, no, no. Not on accident like slamming a door. I mean like grabbing your TV and smashing it. I don't do that. But I feel like
like you would no i have done that yeah yeah that's the most likely to cause damage to you or something you hold dear like he's not gonna just like break something you don't like he's gonna take something that he knows you like and break it and yeah and kate is definitely most likely to slam a door
Or slam a door. What else? Scream like... Yeah. Well, yeah. Maybe raise the voice and yell. What am I most likely to do? You? That's what would cause the problem. Yeah. That's 100% true. What am I most likely to do? Have a lot of attitude. Oh, so much toot. It's all there. Attitude is crazy. What do you mean attitude? What do I mean? I mean...
R-E-S-P-E-C. I can't spell. Respect. That's the word I was trying to spell. Wait, what? The lack thereof of respect. Yeah. We just hear mom over the corner go, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. You know, the other day, Harper and I
Harper and I were on Instagram live and her mom comes in trying to get all her brand deal clothes together because they're coming over to our house. And her mom's like, Harper, where's your new white fox stuff? And Harper literally says, Mom, I don't know. And then she was like about to say something. She was, let me not. I have an audience watching right now. Because she was live streaming. I was like, Harper, you shouldn't not yell at your mom only because there's an audience. And then her mom was like, yeah. And she goes, no, but I can't yell when there's an audience. No, I did not say that. No.
Don't worry. If she's ever given you attitude, just start alive then, I guess. Yeah. Hi, guys. No. I mean, yeah, but, like, I know I shouldn't give attitude. I know I shouldn't give attitude to my mom, but she gives attitude to me. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so.
I'm sorry. The teenager in my eyes is the one giving attitude to the parents. My sister's rude. What does that have to do with anything? Deflection. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. My sister's rude. Listen, I might be bad, but you gotta meet my brother. Bro, let me pop a wheelie. I don't think you can. You know who's worse? Who's even more mean? Is the comment section on our videos. Oh, no. Let's see. They...
They started saying yo mama jokes on one of the TikToks. Oh, God. You want to hear some of them? Sure. I'd love to hear yo mama. I feel like Kate's going to get mad at these. I feel like I can't say these. Don't make inappropriate jokes. Yo mama so fat when she stepped on the stairs and said to be continued. We already said that. It was even funnier coming from you. It's a good try. Yo mama so ugly she walked into a haunted house and walked back out with a job application.
With a what? Job application. I don't know whose mom these are. I don't know whose mom these are based on. Based on a true story. Yo mama's so fat she was overthrown by a small militia group and now she's known as the Republic of Yo Mama.
That's the kind of things you say, Mav, that we're like, our audience doesn't get that. Wait, hold on. I don't get that. Okay. Wait, wait, wait. The audience wrote it, so I don't know if they get it or not. Wait, wait, wait. Explain that. Did you get it, Kate? No, we'll just move on. Wait, no, no. None of us got it, so please explain it. I didn't get it. Can you explain?
Yo mama so fat. No, no, no, no. When she fell, I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up. That was kind of funny. Yo mama jokes are like, have to be the most unfunny jokes. Yo mama so stupid, she returned a donut because it had a hole in it. Your mama so stupid, she, oh, a donut. She just got it. Harper, I can't hear you if you're like that. You guys know donut holes? Yo mama so old, when she was in school, there's no history class.
You guys know donut holes come from the donut and they punch out the middle of the donut? Who would've thought? Why would they do that? Oh, man. Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. They make the donut full. This one's kind of cruel. Your mom is so poor, she chases the garbage truck with a grocery list. Oh, my gosh. Everyone is just kind of side-eyeing Kate right now. Can I laugh at this? Not bad. We didn't write these. No, I just...
Yes, I just don't if any of you guys out there get mad at this remember oh they wrote them yeah Why am I so they made some about Joe here we go? Yeah, Joe mama So dumb she trips over wireless internet Wait these are about Joe's mom or Joe? Yeah Joe is that true?
Joe mama's so big Japan thought Godzilla came back Yo mama jokes What'd you say Joe? I know it's supposed to be funny but I don't really joke about yo mama jokes Joe mama's so big that when she goes camping bears hide their food Okay you can stop What?
You can stop. Joe. I'm so confused. Joe Mama is so fat, Thanos had to clap. His what? Thanos had to clap. Thanos? Thanos. What? Yeah. I don't know. You're just being mean. Joe. Can we move on? I'm bored of this segment. Y'all should have seen Joe before the episode. Joe. Joe. I joke about other people's mom, but not mine.
If you don't start with Joe, just start it with yo and he'll laugh. Joe. Let there be light. He asked her to move out the way. You've been mean to everyone the whole podcast. That's what I'm saying. I've never been mean to everyone the whole podcast. You kind of have. That's crazy. Yes, you have. No, at the beginning. No. We're skipping it. Yeah, we're skipping it.
- I'm skipping it. - That's not true. - Wait, what was so important that you had to wait to tell us? - Oh yeah. - I think we should continue the Joe Mama jokes. - No. - No, dude, for real, stop. - Well, I would, but your mom just gives me so much to talk about. - Dude, mama. - It's not funny. - I get Whataburger. - You really need to stop, for real. - I'm so confused right now. - He's mad at you, okay? Just own it. - Joe looks pretty mad at Gash, I'm not gonna lie.
You screwed up again. What? You have to walk off. I'm sorry. We told you they weren't funny. You said this was a good bit idea. No, I didn't. Yeah, those are good. Let's react to those. You said fans commented your mama jokes. Should we say them? I was like, if you want. You said that's a good idea. I don't think so. So he's kissing the mic. I'm so confused right now.
um so basically me and ericson was this not the plan for the episode we matched today at school is that what y'all were no i didn't no no no we did not wait i didn't know y'all were back on speaking terms again yeah yeah they're always back on my mom doesn't approve do you no nobody here approves mom and i don't think any of the viewers mom do you approve
Yeah, exactly. Maybe... How old are you? 14. Yeah, when do you turn 15? March 20th. You ask me this every podcast. I know, because... Okay, maybe you should just...
be, you know, since you're 14 and all, just be single. Yeah. No, well, he wants me more than I want him, so I'm expecting fail, and I'm expecting failure. What does that even mean? I'm expecting him to cheat on me. Are you just, are you just trying to stay together long enough to get through Valentine's Day? Yes, yes, that's exactly what I'm doing. Isn't that called cuffing season? It's cuffing season. Wait, when is cuffing season? You don't gotta worry about cuffing season. No, I know, but like, I know that's a thing, like, when is that? Uh, I think it's supposed to be, like, when it gets winter, Christmas time, like,
holidays could be cozy together you know no no arison he's like the only story he's like you're so pretty i said no at least he's trying to compliment no and then i was like don't say that but like keep it coming what no no i said don't say that why because it's so cringy i'm not trying to be like his old relationship you don't want him to call you pretty no i want him to say you're ugly
Why would you want anybody to say that? But like as a joke, so then I know he's like... Oh, like flirty. No, no. Just, you're ugly. Oh, just straight up? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'll take advice. Yeah. No? No, Kate doesn't like that. I won't try that one. That doesn't work. No, but we wore Nike dongs, sweatpants, and a black sweatshirt.
Oh, that's so cute. How emo. Matt, do you want to get off your phone? Well, some of these are really funny, and I really want to continue reading them. Yo mama's so fat, when she stepped on a camera, it said, too much weight. What? Yo mama is so nasty, she went swimming and made the Dead Sea. Wow. Wait, I don't even get that. Splash. I'm telling you right now, these jokes are not hitting at all. Yo mama's so old, she was the waitress at the last supper.
Joe I don't understand like you thought this was funny earlier like what's the problem? I'm gonna do your mama jokes, but I'm just I'm confused like if there's a problem like is there a problem if you keep telling jokes like that Yes, you wanted to do these jokes earlier. You thought it was a good idea Just confused we had a whole meeting downstairs about this before we did it I know cash will let you joke like that, but I'm not really gonna play like that. Yeah, I don't care It's a joke
Dude. We literally were joking about it 20 minutes ago. Y'all need to make him stop.
I'm trying. Yeah, I mean, seriously. What is going on right now? I think you should stop. It's just not a good idea. I think it's just inappropriate, weird. Guys, the tension in this room is going to stop. Is this what it was? Is this what the plan was? Like, y'all are going to like, hey, Maverick, here's the script for the episode. We're going to all not continue the script. We're just going to make it look like Maverick's the bad guy. Yeah, but you're just going too much. You're just going in at the same thing. This was the script I was given. What do you mean? We don't script out.
script out the podcast. Before we went down there. All you said was, yo, should we say that Joe Mama... We planned out the whole podcast down there. We planned out all of it. What do you mean planned out all of it? What does that even mean? We planned it out and Joe was like, oh yeah, like Joe Mama jokes could be funny. Wait, wait, wait. What do you mean planned out the whole podcast? All we did was change it from Yo Mama to Joe Mama and now he's all mad. Dude, stop. Bro, do you have a problem? Yes. Stop. I'm so... Like...
Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yo, mom. My jaw's on the floor right now. Like, I'm so confused. Joe doesn't like this. Man, dude, I wish I had popcorn. No, I really like it. No, but mom, seriously, could you please give me water burgers? This is stressing me out. Joe, you can go if you don't want to be here. Well, then, I mean, we kind of want to have camp. Because this is supposed to be a funny podcast, and this was the script, and now he's making it all sad. We kind of want to have camp. Okay, I just want to say something, okay?
I would decide to say, I don't know why everybody keeps getting mad at jokes. Oh my gosh. No, that's not real. I don't know why. That does not happen. Look at his camera. There's no way. His camera's pointing at the ground. His camera's literally just pointing at the ground now. Wait, actually, is he... Is that what you had planned? No. No, this was a plan, right? No. This was scripted. Nope. I was going to talk to you guys about this love is blind chick I met. So he's actually mad? There's no way. No way.
Wait, you're joking. There's no way. I got an idea. I can be Joe. This was literally his idea. Wait, Matt, are you being serious? Yes. No, you're not. Joe doesn't get mad like that. I've never seen him get mad. Cash, you're not Joe. Get off the camera. Say a joke about my mama. Cash, sit down. Joe mama's so fat when she said to be continued. Cash, seriously. Wait, no. Are you going to
Go talk to him! Wait, hold on, okay? I haven't done the pop zoom yet. Hold on. Alright, say something crazy. There is no way this is legit. Are y'all pranking me? Wait, hold on, hold on. No, you're messing with us and I know you are. We'll cut this later, but it's... Are you joking?
I'm convinced y'all joking because this is in the script. This is what I was supposed to do. Wait, hold up. I would like to clarify. What do you mean script? All we said downstairs was no, no, no. We played out the thumbnail. We played out the whole episode. This is ridiculous. Did he drive away? Right now? I don't know what's going on. You're joking, right? Because you talked with him before this. Yeah, y'all schemed this, I thought. Wait, listen to me for one second.
Downstairs we just said can we go mobile right now? Oh one second. Can you listen? Yeah, all you said downstairs was should we make Joe mama jokes or yo mama jokes that people are commenting on? Yes, you left you left and you said you said yes, that's a good idea. Let's do that first segment I said, okay me and Joe continue to talk about it We picked out comments that we're gonna do and then I read them and I didn't want to read them to you beforehand cuz I wanted to be legit and
I mean, I saw him laughing and stuff, but like, if you're being serious, you clearly saw he was getting upset over the joke. Well, I didn't know if he was like playing or something. Why didn't you just stop? Why did you have to push him? Well, I mean, here's the thing. He couldn't get mad over his joke. If Joe is mad right now, what do you want to do? Go get him? Can we go mobile?
We're going mobile. Have you seen that guy? Wait, hit me with one. What? Hit me with one. Off camera? Off camera? We'll cut this out. You're still on camera. No, but actually off camera. Are you joking? Yeah. Guys, why did you have to do that? Hold on. He texted me. Wait, he texted you? Yeah. What'd he say? One second, Harper. Hold on.
No, he's all joking. Cash can read it. No, he's messing with us, Mom. I already know. What does it say, Mav? You can read it. I just didn't want Harper to read it. Why? Okay, well, listen. Okay, guys, since no one's talking on the episode right now, I'm just gonna talk. We handle the situation over there. Can I read it, please? That was an ugly text.
Wait, you put your mic in front of your... This is crazy right now. This is wild. That was a crazy text. Like, guys, Joe jokes about everything. Like, listen, we joke. We go pretty hard with jokes off camera. Like, we joke around a lot. Yeah. And Joe is like... Can I please read it? Trust me. It's not appropriate for you. Wait, so we're not joking here? No. We're not joking. Do you think he's joking? Okay.
Sorry, I hope this is a joke Wait, I got you guys I'll make sure we're... Wait Oh, this sounds sick What time are we at? Do we have a full episode? Um, you... I'd say like I would know In the corner of the thing it should say what the time is Corner of the thing should say time...
Can I please... It says 100% battery. Wait, what did you say? I don't know. What did you say? Kate. Wait, wait. No, no, no, no, no, no. What's the soundboard say? We're good on... Listen, okay, listen to what I'm saying. Are we good on time? I'm listening. 38 minutes. Okay, then maybe we should just wrap it up. No, no, no, no, no.
You still... Bro, think about it. I can't believe this. Think about it. Our producer is gone. Cash is not here. He doesn't even know how to tell time. I can't believe they're talking about me when I'm right here. You don't even know how to tell what time we're at. Dude, I know. It's probably like... What time is it right now? Like 4.30? Like...
Dude, what? Guys, I'm convinced this is all a joke. Y'all are just joking with me because joke, like, because Joe isn't like that. Like, he doesn't do that. So, can I please just read the text? I told you Matt had anger issues. That was not me. He's the one that walked away. Okay. These were his jokes with me. I agree. And that's, listen. I agree. Oh, wait, Joe's back. I'll just let you take this now.
Joe, do you have something you'd like to say? It was a bit. We were just joking. It was a joke? Yeah, it was a joke. It was a Joe joke. It was actually Joe's idea for the whole joke. You know what's crazy? What?
Is I think y'all are so slow? Oh, bro, I got you don't even broke the second Joe said the first time he said that's not funny whenever I said, oh this is Okay, okay, bro, I knew all along I
I mean, I kind of stressed for a minute. No, the text was just us talking about if he should come back in yet or not. Yeah, see that. Oh, bro. I was really intrigued. That's like the second walkout fake. I was like, no, he got mad over a joke. Two people playing on the pod. I don't know if you guys watched the episode where all of them planned to make me mad. And they obviously made me mad. And then I walked off. But I was actually walking off because they all were purposely trying to troll me.
One day, somebody's actually going to walk off out of anger and it's going to be completely unplanned and we're not going to, like, nobody's going to care. We're all going to think it's fake. Oh, he's just joking. Matt is over there smashing cameras, just kicking it. No, went to Michael, the editor's editing this though. He's going to be like, oh my gosh, this is legit. Yeah, the editors are going to be like, oh my gosh, this is the last episode. I need to find a new job. Like,
Can you imagine? If Mav's mad, I promise you guys, if Mav ever actually legitimately gets mad on the podcast. That camera's knocked over for sure. Because that's towards the exit. That camera's getting pushed over directly to the right, which is going to knock down that camera right on the job. And I'm probably going to light out with me.
Who do you think is going to be the first one to actually get mad? If somebody actually gets mad and is like, guys, we can shoot another day or whatever. I'm done. I'm leaving. It's going to be you, unfortunately. Sorry. I only say that because you would get mad at something I said or something Cash said.
And you wouldn't think it's funny. Not saying that what we said might not be completely unhinged. It would be wild. It might be something we should not have said. Something that was private. But actually, I would say any three of us might could say it, honestly. Yeah. And... I wouldn't. I don't think Harper would say it. I would. Harper wouldn't say it. Harper would say it without... Here's the thing. Harper would say it without intending to make her mad. Yeah. And then...
kate would just be like oh we'll just cut it out but if me and you like continued on it yeah that's if anybody is gonna walk off i think it's gonna be me and mad making jokes that we think are funny that you don't and we're gonna continue done that and i haven't walked off no i know but it's it'd be like something that you actually think is like but we could push the limit not funny oh nothing i'll not i mean i'll tell you what bro that made me kind of like i kind of felt like joe was mad no because he actually seemed mad and i was like wait is he actually mad
So Joe has anger issues, guys. I was like, is he actually mad? I would say the hardest person to get mad would be Harper to get her mad to leave. Really? Yeah, I don't get mad. I don't know what we would say. Oh, I think I could get Harper mad.
Yeah, I think Harper would be one of the easiest for me to get mad at. No, but I don't know what we would say. I believe she would get mad. I could say a bunch of stuff. Yeah, if her sister was on here, or her sibling or something. I don't know what we could say. I could make Harper mad within five minutes. I'd make her never want to come back to this house. Okay. No. Not doing that. No, no, no. Let's see. No. I just know I can't. You don't think you could?
I don't think so. I don't know what I would lead off with at all. I don't know, but I just try. I fire a bunch of things up. Yeah, you would just have to say, you would just fake stuff to her, act like her mom's saying something, but tell her, her mom said this, her mom said this. She'll just get mad enough to where she just walks off. I would just fire a bunch out of her, see what sticks, and when I say something that makes her mad, then... The short jokes, the ginger jokes, those don't make me mad. That's what I'm saying. Those are just like, whatever. No, those wouldn't make you mad. They're not going to make you mad. But like...
Nothing makes me mad. Oh, yeah, it does. You get mad when you get told what to do. Mom, stop. Please. Oh, God. Well, we should probably wrap this episode up. I get mad when I'm wrongly accused of something. Wrongly accused? Or when I lie about something and then somebody finds out that I lied about it and then I'm like, no, I didn't. That's why you don't get mad when they make the redhead and short jokes.
No, I don't think that. Because you're not wrongly accused. You would do horrible in court if you ever got accused of something. In court? No. Like, something that you did not do? I would jump the judge. Dude, that was crazy. That was absurd. Did you see that? Yeah, absolutely. That was crazy. You know what my favorite part of it was? Like, two weeks later, he had to go back to the hearing with the same judge. Did you see that? He had to go back, and he came in. He's, like, all chained up and stuff this time. And the judge sits down.
It's just the tension in that room was crazy. They had like 15 officers. And he's just like. - That's crazy. That's like insane. - Imagine, because wasn't it literally just for like some sort of like driving ticket? - No, I don't know. - I think he got sent in for like life. - Life in parole. - Yeah, he like. - No, no, no, because I looked it up. I was like, I wonder what he got. And it was something like minor. Like he was probably gonna get like a couple years.
But it wasn't like it was like three years. Yeah, it was something like three or four years. But now it's like 15. Now I'm gonna probably quadruple that sentence. Not gonna lie. What happens when you jump the judge? Yeah, you can't be doing that. Dude, you know what I thought was crazy in the video that when he jumps the judge,
Not many people looked like they helped the judge. It was like a brawl for a minute. I was like, let's see what happens. I don't think anybody knew what to do. We never... I got money on the criminal. Is that the first time in history a person has jumped the judge? No. No, definitely not. But probably the way he did. This is the first time anybody's ever done this in the whole entire world.
Like that's the first time anybody's on that because you can't do the same motions. You can't move the same muscle You know, I think all the time I'm like this is the first time anyone's ever said this sentence and I'm like what? supersonic Supersonic camera lost in the ocean at the bottom of the sea super sky mushroom. No, it's not really a coherent sentence But no one's ever said those words come on. No, nobody's ever done this. Oh
Like, nobody's ever moved those. Well, that was a pretty basic move. Kind of crazy. But, you know what I mean? No one's ever said that sentence in one. Y'all think about a lot of the same things. Yeah, y'all's brains are alike. But, you know, she's 14 and you're, like, 21, so. No, but you can't, like, nobody's ever done. You know, guys, I'm almost 21. My birthday is coming up.
Wait, your birthday's coming up too. Yeah. What's the date? March 20th. No, no, no. I knew it was in March. What's the date date? March 20th, 2009. My birthday's first. I don't believe you. You're lying. You're 21 right now. No, I'm 20. I think he's 20 because he can't go to the bar. You think I'm 20? What the? Wait, are you for real? He was born in 2003, Joe. Well, wait. They've been married a year. Why are you doing math, bro? I'm your brother. I don't remember. But I know that he was 19 when they got married.
And they've been married a year. Year and a half. Year and a half. So then 21 March. Yeah. So this year they'll be married two years. That'd be 21. I don't know why I do a math. I just, I told you my age. I'm 20. I'm having a crisis because I'm actually about to be 20. What is it with the lipstick thing? You're just always playing with it. You can't ever set it down. It's the weirdest thing. I know. I like fiddling. Kate has been having a crisis. The amount of time, you know, she said something. At least like once a day I say it. She said something today. I won't say what it was, but she said,
but I don't want to tell my parents or something. I was like, you're almost 20 years old. You don't got to tell. It was like a stupid thing. And she's like, no, I'm only 19. I was like, yeah, okay. Well, you're almost 20. She's like, no, she can't, she can't accept the fact that she's almost 20. I, I'm literally gonna, I don't know. I don't like thinking about it. I like being a teenage girl.
What does that mean? You basically attend more good years of your life. No, I just like being able to say, when I hit a curb, I can say, sorry, I'm just a teenage girl. When our bumper hits something, sorry, I'm just a teenage girl. You can't get mad at me for being a teenage girl. No, they're mad at you for hitting the curb. They're not mad at the age. You only have 10 more good years of your life.
He only has seven. That's really sad to say. That's a terrible thing. Harper, I'm 27. You have three more good years of your life. That's not true, first of all. I mean, I've been telling my friends, once you're 30, you're over. No, I'm peaking at 30. What are you talking about? I'm peaking at 30. I'm going up, bro. I'm on a trajectory no one can stop. I'll be 30, I'll be chilling. Here's how I feel life works. You're 40, I feel like I'll start to feel it. Zero to 10, you're a baby.
10 to like 20 it's like you know you're learning you're growing up you're growing up 20 to 30 I feel like it's like oh you're living life now like you're living 30 to 40 is like you learned how to live life yeah some stuff hurts a little yeah you just learned how to do it better some joints are aching um
40 to 50 is like, okay, you definitely got at least one or two kids. And yeah, you probably shouldn't be doing... You skipped like all 30s? You said 20 to 30s? No, I said 30 to 40s. And now 40 to 50s
Oh yeah, 40 to 50s is like, yeah, you probably got a couple kids. You got to be super responsible. Like, you're an adult. You have graduated to adulthood. And 50 plus, you're retired. Yeah.
Nah, it's your time. 50, you can still be cooking, bro. No, I'm kidding. 50 plus, you're getting ready to run for president. Yeah, 50, you're like president. Well, should be president age. And then 60, like 65, you're retired. You out of here. Man, you said so many things that I wish I could have stopped you before because I was so bored at the very beginning. What the? And you just continued to do all the ages. You know, when you want to know something else about an age, they're trying to raise R's.
retirement yes yeah what's up with that? I saw this wait wait is that you two? no not I don't fit in y'all do it's all y'all have you seen that? no way the retirement age right now is what 65 62 something like that we don't gotta retire 60 I thought it was 65 yeah 65 65 68 the retirement age right now is 65 they're trying to raise it for us to like 70 or like 73 or something oh shut up wow we don't have a retirement age 70 year olds don't even work in we gotta take care of our people you know well
I probably won't work when I'm that old. I'm probably not going to work much longer at all. Kate is going to be working next year. I think I'm 20. I'm not a teen anymore. I think I'm done working right now. You know what Kate told me? I think the podcast is over. You know what Kate told me yesterday? She goes, no, two days ago. Sorry. Two days ago. She has a mental breakdown. Starts crying. All I do is work. Like a dog. I'm a work horse. Oh my gosh. You are not a dog. No, no, no. Because she was like, half the time I just...
I mean, you work very hard and you do lots of great things and I cherish you very much. But I also know that a lot of time you watch a TV, dog. No, no. She's like, oh, I do. She's like, I do. You know, I do like the social media stuff like that type of stuff. Oh my gosh, you make me sound so bratty. But then I also have to clean the house and all this stuff. And then she goes, I have no time to myself. And I was like, well, what about two nights ago when you had girls night and like all your friends came over and they were like, she's like, well, that was like,
That doesn't happen often. Next day, she had like the whole entire day off. And she read her books and watched TV. I was like, what about now? Because, listen, first of all, you're making me sound like I'm some brat. No, I was just saying you had a moment. Yeah.
And I literally they don't want to talk about how every single day I talk about how grateful I am that this is my life and I don't have to go to college and I don't have to wake up and work a nine to five every single day for the rest of my life. They don't want to tell you that. But I do say that quite often. Besides the point. Yeah, I was overwhelmed. We are just like filming a lot and I'm exhausted and my body is hurting in so many different ways. I'm exhausted and I'm tired.
And I was, and we just like, we've, we're always doing something. Even on days we're not filming, we're doing something else. And then on top of that, I tried to keep up with the house and I live with three grown men and it's just a lot. And I was like, you're complaining again. No, I started out grateful. And my life sucks. It's just horrible. No, I'll tell you how much I love my life. Think about it. Think about it.
Think about waking up at 5.30 a.m. every morning, doing school for eight hours, sitting in a chair, sitting like hunched over. Are you talking about you? Yes. Well, you should sit. There you go. It's probably your posture. No, it's sitting in a chair for eight hours and then going to a stupid podcast.
Everybody is on one today. Not me. I personally haven't said nothing rude. Which is an accomplishment. I actually talk about you. Honestly, Harper's life is crazy. Waking up, going to school, cheer, doing the podcast. Don't know how you do it. Sounds like your bulge is complaining now. Y'all should start your own podcast.
Talk about, it could be called like workhorse. Listen. Slaves. Y'all literally don't, y'all make me sound like I'm so bad. Yo, this, this episode is on. All I'm saying is that I was under the impression that I was going to be a wife and a mother. Huh? I was under the impression that I was going to be a wife and a mother. You are a wife. So stop trying to get into that. All right, we should end the episode. All right, guys. Thank you so much for watching. We'll see you next time. Peace out, bro. Did you want us to?