cover of episode Kate’s First Heartbreak!

Kate’s First Heartbreak!

2024/12/28
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The LOL Podcast

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People
C
Chase
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Harper
K
Kate
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Narrator
一位专注于电动车和能源领域的播客主持人和内容创作者。
Topics
Kate: 我在六年级时经历了第一次心碎的恋爱。我的男友和朋友几乎没有说过话,他的朋友说我很难看,这让我很伤心。后来,男友当众和我分手,我哭了一整天,非常尴尬。这件事让我意识到世界并非总是美好的。 这段经历让我非常难过,我哭了一整天,在每个课堂上都哭泣,同学们都看着我,我感到非常尴尬。一个同学安慰我说我值得拥有更好的人,这让我对他产生了好感。 同一天,我放学后说脏话被老师听到,老师打电话给我妈妈,妈妈没收了我的手机,还发现我和男友的短信,这让我更加伤心。 Chase: 我在一个高尔夫球场上看到一个高大、穿着白色衣服的生物。它大约10英尺高,全身白色,没有穿衣服,像细长的人形大脚怪。我当时非常害怕,赶紧逃跑了。 我告诉我的表哥,他认出了这个生物,并告诉我那是“高个白人”。后来,历史频道采访了我,因为我的目击事件发生在莱特·帕特森空军基地附近,那里据说隐藏着外星人。 我家的一个花岗岩纸巾盒上刻有与我所描述的生物相似的图案。我认为我看到的生物向我发出了恐惧的信号,所以我才感到如此害怕。

Deep Dive

Key Insights

What was Kate's first heartbreak experience?

Kate's first heartbreak occurred in sixth grade when her boyfriend broke up with her in front of his friends in the school hallway. They had barely spoken in person during their two-month relationship, and the breakup was public and humiliating. Additionally, his best friend had previously called her ugly, which added to her emotional pain.

Why did Kate's boyfriend break up with her in such a public manner?

Kate's boyfriend broke up with her in front of his friends in the school hallway, likely to assert dominance or avoid a private, emotional confrontation. The public nature of the breakup amplified Kate's embarrassment and emotional distress.

How did Kate react to her first heartbreak?

Kate reacted by sobbing uncontrollably for the rest of the school day. She cried in every class, and her teachers even checked on her, thinking something serious had happened at home. The emotional toll was significant, and she felt deeply humiliated.

What was the role of Kate's boyfriend's best friend in her heartbreak?

Kate's boyfriend's best friend told him that if he ever called Kate beautiful again, he would slap him because she was 'so ugly.' This comment was relayed to Kate by her best friend, adding to her feelings of insecurity and heartbreak.

What happened after Kate's breakup that made her day even worse?

After the breakup, Kate got in trouble for saying 'what the frick' loudly outside school. A teacher overheard her, called her parents using Kate's phone, and her parents discovered she had been texting her boyfriend. They confronted her, and she lied about the relationship, compounding her emotional distress.

How did Kate's parents react to discovering her relationship?

Kate's parents discovered her relationship after going through her phone. They confronted her, and she lied, claiming it was just a rumor at school. This added to the emotional turmoil of an already devastating day.

What was the kindest thing someone did for Kate during her heartbreak?

A classmate who saw Kate crying all day told her she deserved someone better. This small act of kindness made a significant impact on Kate, and she developed a crush on him afterward.

Chapters
The podcast begins with a discussion about first heartbreaks, transitioning to anecdotes about daily routines, social media, and unusual events like alien sightings and a wrestling move gone wrong. The focus shifts to a water-related prank gone awry.
  • The podcast starts with a discussion about first heartbreaks.
  • Anecdotes about daily routines, social media and unusual events are shared.
  • A water prank is mentioned.

Shownotes Transcript

Translations:
中文

We started dating in February and we maybe in the whole two months that we were dating spoke like ten words to each other. So you guys were like secret Romeo and Juliet type lovers? I've heard generic financial advice all my life. Like, don't buy fancy coffee every day.

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everybody knew we were dating. A little side thing that shattered my heart. The guy I was dating told his best friend that he thought I was the most beautiful girl in the world and his best friend responded, if you ever say that again, I'm going to slap you across the face because she's so ugly. Bro, Kate, you're actually going to make me cry. I know. Before Chase comes in here, Chase, our friend, thinks he saw an alien, so y'all be nice to him in the comments. And then all of a sudden, I'm riding, I look back again, and I really get a good look at

this thing and i see a 10 foot tall all white no clothes walking like a slender man sasquatch and i'm like i'm either gonna have to hop off of this thing and run for my life or i'm gonna die here today harper about that video that jason harb posted um what is jason arb

What is? My mom called him Jason Carb. Jason Carb? He's like mom. He's carving up right now. It's ball team season, baby. Oh,

So, like, you came on here complaining about the video, but you were in the video. So, either you do like being in the video, or you don't like being in the video. You don't get to just be like, oh, did you see that video he posted? How rude. When you were, like, volunteering to be in the video. Every time Jason Harper posts a video, Kate's like, or Harper's like, he posted again. I never saw this coming. I mean, I didn't participate in the whole thing, but I mean. Danny Cash! What? You drank all my water, boy! Whoa! Why do you sound like a... It had to be done! You sound like a...

You sound like one of those movie characters. You're like, gosh darn it, I need another beer. I need a cigarette. Oh my goodness. Do we have to bleep that? Why did I see Kate say that after like four children? Like, what's going to happen? I need a cigarette. I need an e-cigarette. That's crazy. Oh no. I wish I had a camera angle for that one. She just like looked at her tea like it was like, I don't know,

looking i was looking to see if it was steaming like it was this close to her eyes and her eyes were almost crossed she's like i needed to see if it's steaming you know i've been i was wanting never mind all right bro you gotta stop doing that every episode i think i'm gonna go plant my never mind oh i self-tanned oh you self-tanned again i think i'm gonna have to go get a water because i don't think my voice is gonna make it through you'll be fine do

Just swallow your spit. You'll be fine. Jess? No, actually, I... Can you grab a water bottle? No, you're not... You're not my servant. You're not my servant. You just wanted to go try to find your gift. That's what you were going to go do. No. You were going to get water? Yeah, I... Listen to my voice. Wait. Listen, if I try... Where's my gift? You guys said... If I try to sing a high note, it won't work. No, Harper, that's never worked. Appreciate it. It doesn't work.

Harper. No, y'all better give that girl water! Okay, I'll give you water! Please, please! I just washed my hair! No! We're just gonna give you water. Come on, Harper. Just anything, please, but don't wash your hair. I got a crazy game. We're gonna text each other. One of us, if you choose the right one, one of us is gonna spray the water on you. One of us will actually give you the water.

Okay? Math, text me which one you want to be. Wait, no, if she can't get her hair wet, don't do it. Math, text me which one you want to be. Cash...

If Harper can't get her hair wet, don't do it. Well, it's up to her if she gets her hair wet. If you have to spray it, just spray it in my face, not my hair. The hair is all finished. Oh, yeah, that'll work. For sure. She's soaking wet for the next hour. Matt just texted me which one he wants to be. And y'all can't joke around and fake it. Oh, no, you're not. But I might squeeze this thing just all over you in a second. Matt, Matt are chokes. I'm checking to make sure that the correct brother does it.

Okay. Okay. Okay, so I choose any brother? One of us will give you the water. Just hand it over. Or you can choose both of us and see what happens. You get a drink, Andy. One of us will just give it to you. The other one is just going to squeeze the bottle. Maverick. Maverick. Take the water. Take the water, Harper. Go ahead and grab the bottle, Harper. Just grab the bottle, Harper. Stop doing that. Just grab it.

Last chance, Harper. Do you want this bottle? Yes. Are you sure you want that one? Are you sure you want this bottle? Yes. How bad do you want your hair to not get wet? Oh! You are not supposed to spray water! You sprayed me first! You sprayed yourself, what an idiot. The one thing she said was don't spray her. She sprayed me first! Because you want to give her the bottle! Stop throwing stuff! It's really not cool. Guys! Wait, how did it get in your hair? Because mom

No, she sprayed me. Okay. Do you feel better now? Well, there might be like some. Maverick was supposed to give Harper a drink and Cash was supposed to spray it. I didn't spray her until she sprayed on me. My thingy. No. Maverick wanted to go up the bottle and that's why she tried to grab it aggressively. Maverick, you were supposed to hand it to her. That's like literally your fault. You scammed her.

Do you need to go change? Yes! Go. No, she's trying to get the gift! And I haven't got to open my gift and you're gonna spoil it for me. I just can't believe you sprayed air. What?

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She did. That was like the one thing she said. I literally said like... You would not have sprayed it on Kinsey's hair. Just wait. I would if Kinsey sprayed me first. Just wait. Wait for what? Watch my hair curl up. You gonna make a diss track about me? You know what? Yeah.

Yeah, I am and what does that mean? Please stop Barbie, that is so inhumane. It's so gross. Dude, not like you just jumped on a tree with your butt the other day. No cash. Yeah, I remember that. We all remember that. Guys, RIP or another TV. Oh, yeah, please fix that, man. Yeah, last episode, if you guys didn't watch. You'll have to. I kind of like did a wrestling move off the top of this. Oh my gosh. And the TV came down. You want a blowjob? Yes.

Sorry, you can't do that. But we are about to have a moment of truth on if the TV broke or not. We just bought this TV last week. I don't even think it was a week ago. We bought it like four days ago. So we're going to see if it's broke. Anybody got any bets? I actually have no idea. It's definitely not broke. Not broke. There's no way. I don't think so.

Oh, there it goes. It's gone. It's gone. So good. Everything you touch just breaks. Oh, no. Did you turn it off? No one turned it off, dude. You have the remote. To that TV? This doesn't work to that. I'm telling you. That was bullcrap if I've ever seen it.

- Oh crap, if I've ever seen it. - Well, have you ever seen it? - I just want a water. - Wait, yeah, you still didn't get a water. - Go get your water, Harper. - No, I'll get it, trust me, please. - Cash, you okay there, bud? - Tracking mud everywhere, the house just got cleaned. - Our house just got cleaned today. - Is it on? - No! - Actually, it is on. The red light's on. - No, it says on. - It's on. - What are you saying, is it on? - Yes, it's on.

Oh, he's so dumb. Yeah. Guys, listen. I know in the comments some of y'all are going to be like, Maverick, you shouldn't have thrown the water. He's trying to make himself a victim. Maverick! Not victim! He's trying to victimize himself. We got a situation, man. A what situation, bro? Your wife called me dumb. Oh. And I don't take that lightly. So she has to suffer some consequences. Dude, I guess just take it. I'd be scared of that if I was you, Maverick. No, she knows better.

She knows better what- I'd be very scared of that if I was you. I'm insanely soaked. Mad mad, I can feel it. You can put your boyhood on, can you too? The way she's trying to act like she cares, she's like, "I didn't want this to happen." Are you trying to act like me? No! You can play it a little better than that if that's what you're trying to do, Harper.

- It's on. - Yeah, Kate plays the victim very well. - I don't play the victim, I am a victim. There's a difference between playing and being, and I being a victim. - You are a victim? - I being a victim. - I being victim. - Listen, what are you doing, bro? Bro, what are you doing? - Bro, yo, chill on my hair, please.

I can't believe your hair is still in there. It's a Roku TV. I see that. Why is it like that? You said this on and off, man. That's gonna fall. We should take this hair and auction it off. No, we should take that hair to all the live shows. Are your fingernails still in there? To all the live shows and then we'll be like, this hair has been to multiple states and countries. The hair on your head has been to multiple states and countries as well. Maybe not, but this definitely has. And we need to make it into a picture or something. What?

Where did that come from? That drawer. That's her hair. Why are you looking in the drawer? Oh my gosh, my nails are in there. Oh, there's our free merch vouchers. Hide those. That's disgusting.

Be more chill. The TV is like crooked. Stop throwing things in the wall. You can spear it right through the wall, but please don't hit our nice painting. Oh my gosh. Nice. Like our house, like the foundation is going out, I think. No, but that wall's foundation is, man. Every time I hit this thing, it's getting closer and closer to falling over. You know what makes me sad? Huh? Our house is like a giant prop. It's really unfortunate. It really is. It's just like we have a prop house.

And we have no real home. We're homeless. Yeah, we're homeless. Yeah, no, we do live in a... I sound like a weed eater, man. I told you, a victim of bullying at the moment. What? I said I told you I'm a victim of bullying at the moment. A victim of bullying? You bullied yourself. Weed, weed, weed, weed, weed, weed.

Are you making fun of my stutter? Your stutter? No, we're making fun of that you didn't properly construct a sentence in your head before you started speaking. And you were like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. No, he's making fun of the stutter I have. No, because you didn't know what you were going to say. Kate doesn't have a stutter. She's fooling you. That's actually crazy. You're trying to claim you have a stutter. Yeah, we have like 5,000 episodes where you didn't stutter. I do glitch sometimes, and it's a stutter. That's what just happened. I knew exactly what I was going to say, but I stuttered when I said it, and Maverick is making fun of me for it.

Hold on. What do you mean hold on? It says a lot about your character. Why'd you say hold on? I'm not on my phone for no reason. That's not even what I was saying. Oh my goodness. I just realized you're not supposed to be on your phone. And if your mom watches this episode and sees you on your phone the whole time. I'm texting a friend. Oh, you're not supposed to be doing that. Yeah, you're grounded right now. Your mom told us not to let you on your phone. You seriously aren't allowed to be doing that. Well, she doesn't care. She does what she wants.

And I'm not gonna stop her, so. - Harper, at this point are we like always family? - Matt, what are you possibly adjusting, man? - I'm moving it closer. - Like he's adjusting his-- - At this point are we like basically family? - Yeah. - You have red hair though. - Who's like the mommy and daddy? - Oh. - That's odd.

of that? Let's definitely bleep it. Just a continuous bleep. Please, I want to bleep it. I don't even know why we should bleep it, but it just... I feel like we should be. What do kids call their parents, mommy and daddy? I call my dad Poppy. I call mom Pops. Does anybody actually call their dad Pops? Sometimes I do. My friend Annalie does. Really? You don't call dad Pops every once in a while? Pops? No. I've never heard Cash say that. Pops? Sometimes I'll be like, hey Pops. And that just sounds like a pop. It sounds like a cliche movie saying.

Sometimes I say father. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Pops sounds like, hey, Pops. Like it's like in a New Jersey baseball movie. Hey, senior. I just can't believe you got my hair wet. You forced my hand, man. He literally squeezed it. Yeah, but she like pushed it all in. She did ask you not to. It's just like, it's really. So if I ask you, Kate, not to throw water on me, and then I throw water on you. She didn't throw water on you. You wouldn't let go of the bottle.

You're telling me she didn't intentionally throw the water on me? No, I think you intentionally gripped the bottle a little bit too hard and Harper had to rip it out of your hands because she was thirsty. You were depriving her of water and then you got all upset when the water she was trying to grab out of your hands got on you. Hey, we're going to be upset about things. Remember when I said three days ago we need AAA batteries? I bought you AAA batteries. You did? They're on the kitchen counter. Hey, listen. You need to take back everything you said because Harper is going to tell the truth right here. Harper?

No, don't. Did you intentionally get water on me? No. I wouldn't do that. See? She would. That was clear evidence of her lie. I don't understand what your problem is. You don't understand what my problem is? You always are doing things to me. Because you try to frame me. That's what I don't understand. You're putting me over the edge. You're pushing me to my limit. So why don't you just quit? She's about to crash out. CPU overload. Skippity overload. Oh.

Oh, boy. No one does it better than you. Skibbity riz. Harper's line in the song that says that, like, I was dying. Dude, it almost got cut, too. It was close. It was, like, this close to getting cut. No, that cannot be cut. No, it's not getting cut. Skibbity riz. What's your other line? It's, like, skibbity riz and I know who I am. Oh, I know. I found my voice. That's what it is. It's so funny. Yeah, we...

I know what I was gonna say but I glitched. Listen, we- this is what I was gonna say. Did you get that? Why did it fly sideways? It's gonna rip someone's hair out. Now Kinsey! Kinsey! Kinsey! Stop it Kinsey! This was my Christmas present!

Yeah, but it's still a present. Okay? If you guys didn't watch the Christmas episode, this is my Christmas present I got. And I've been waiting on AAA batteries to come in ever since. Hey, you can't fly through that hole at top speed. It's behind me. You're gonna take one of our eyes out. No, he's not gonna take nobody's eye out. In case y'all are wondering, I've been a drone pilot for like two weeks now. Oh, no!

Genius. You ain't no drone pilot. Yeah, these pilot days are over. No, you're cut. No, seriously, we drove. How far is that? Like three, four miles? Now, why would she do that? I didn't put any on you, man. See, that's what she does. And now you're going to look bad if you put it on her. That's it. The helicopter is on a suicide mission. Wait, if it hits her hair, gosh, if it gets her hair, it's ripping her hair out. No. Oh, okay. You can't defend yourself, Harper. She just squashed that thing. Okay, I can't defend myself.

I can't defend you there. I was so uncalled for, Harper. You actually broke it, man. Oklahoma State. No, I did not, okay? You actually broke it and it's not flying straight. No one cares. It was never flying straight. I'm going to fly through the hole. Just give me a second. Harper, unfortunately, I did watch you just dump the ball on the floor. Harper, you're standing right in front of the camera. Ready? Watch. Here we go. Here we go. Ready? Let me just go change it.

Oh, oh, oh my! Up, up, up, up, up, up, up. You unplugged something. No more airplane. It's so loud. Please. It's kind of funny watching Cash attempt to pilot it. It is funny. But what's even crazier is he looks like a caveman with his feet out right now. Oh my god. His feet just out in the dirt. He's like a modern caveman with his helicopter. Yeah. It's like caveman. Matt, please don't. Please don't hit it. Why would I hit it? Oh wait, hold on. I would never hit that thing. Alright, here we go.

Harper versus helicopter. I need to sit here. Hold on. Here we go. Ready? If that thing comes at me, Cash... No, it's not going to, Kinsey. I swear I will destroy it. Matt, I can barely go straight. I got my slipper for if it comes close to me. Oh, that's bull. Stuck in a tree. I won't fly it anymore. I'll destroy that, too. No, don't break that one. This is actually like...

I got my real drum. This is like expensive. And if it gets broken, even by me, you have to buy a new one. Nobody hit this one. This one's like $1,000. Okay, that's enough. Are you recording? Yeah. Are you recording? No. You should record. I think that's enough. Look at how steady that thing is. That's pretty crazy. That is kind of insane. It looks like it's being held up. He drove this thing all the way to Starbucks over the car. He drove it to the Olive Garden. Oh, really? Yeah.

- People around us were like, oh my gosh, somebody's following us. - Oh my gosh. - Jays, y'all ready? - It's China. - Wait, no, the funniest thing, Kate, I don't know if we told you, this poor kid outside on the sidewalk walking by our house, Cash was like following him around and he's on his scooter and he's like scooting as fast as he possibly can. - No, poor my bullying. - Wait, because he was flying the thing around? - Do you guys remember the drone? - Cash was following him with the drone and the poor little kid was just, what'd you say? - There's drones in Utah and they said it was China.

Oh, oh, Cash, Cash, Cash! Cash! Cash! You freaking idiot! Cash, come on, man! I knew that was gonna happen too! I just knew it! He broke it, huh? Okay, that's awkward. Please tell me it's not broken! Oh!

Wait, wait, let me see, let me see. Is it broken? Hey, it's gonna be broken if you keep flying it. It's fine. Yo, I'm actually a master at flying kites. Freaking Taliban hired you. You're that bad at piloting. Dude perfect. Is it dude perfect? Is it dude perfect? Alright, here we go. Is he dude perfect? No, he is dude fail. He is not dude perfect. Cash. Cash. Stop it. That's like a thousand dollar drone. Please stop.

- It's enough. - I'm aware. - He literally wants to break it so that he can go buy the $3,000 drone after this. - It's flying fine. Flying hot. Matt, stop. If that blade hits someone, it's actually dangerous. - Oh yeah? - If I sit on top of it, it won't fly me up? - I'd be so mad if you take my eyeball out. - He has it in sport mode. Why is it in sport mode? - 'Cause it's gotta be sporty, man. - Okay. - All right, we're gonna go through the hole. - Look at the wind. It's blowing the dirt on the ground. - I'm so scared.

Cash, it won't fit through that hole. I'm so scared it's going to hit the wall and come back at us, Kate. Cash, I don't think it fits through the hole. It does not fit through the hole, Cash. Protect your head. Cash, please. He's going to go full speed. No, he's not going to do that. Wait, yeah, it will fit if you can turn it sideways as it goes through. You'd have to do some crazy maneuvers here. Nobody cares to watch this online. Come on, Cash. I promise everyone's entertained. No. Oh, Cash. Cash.

You're like an angel straight out of her head. No, no, no. You see, the drone does not fit that way. That's crazy. So it has to go sideways. How's that floating in the air? Here we go. Oh, no. Cash, it's not going to fit that way. It's not going to. Cash. Oh, no, Cash. This is terrifying. Oh, oh, oh. All right, I'm going to call it. I'm going to call it. It's not fitting. Yeah, okay. All right. It's landing. Okay, calm down.

Okay. That's crazy. You fly outside, I'm fire. No, you're not. Oh, this carpet is disgusting. And you just keep tracking it everywhere. Every step, it's going everywhere. His shoes are gross. What are you doing over here? Pains. Pains? Yeah, you. You did. What? You did. You literally were like, wins.

I actually promise you- He's poking wet over here! He's got teacher butt! Guys, I'm selling this on feet finder. Yo, that's a crazy pic! That's a crazy pic. You guys send that to Alex, throw that up on the screen. I'm not capping, kidsy. I actually promise you I did not mean to put my butt in your face just now. You poked it out, Sarcash! It's cause I wasn't trying to step on the carpet with my feet, because my feet are dirty. So I don't know what my butt was doing. Man, Cash, all I know is you are never gonna be a pilot.

No, I promise you guys, when I fly it outside, I can go everywhere. Where there's nothing to hit? No, I can go in between power lines, everything. Yeah, right. I don't think that's legal. If you hit a power line, it catches on fire, and then you go to jail. What? Low key? I don't think that's how that works. Yeah, I don't think so. Wait, genuinely? Genuinely?

Genuinely what? Dude, you know that's my least favorite word? Genuinely? Genuinely is my least favorite word. Like, say seriously. You always say genuinely. It's his least favorite word. Weest. Weest. Weest. You know what word I also hate? I hate when people say... It's like a group of people. What do they say? They say... Me and the boys? Business people, they're always like, oh, we got the...

I can't remember. But it's a stupid word. Wow, man. That was great. Hey, you've done this before too, man. The gang? No, gang is fine. Gang, gang. Yeah, that's fine. Business people. Yeah. And they say, we got the... We got the bag. No, not the bag. The bag. There's a group of... But instead of a group, they use another word instead of group. For business people? Yeah. Cohort? Cohort. What is that? When they're like...

Yeah. They're like the cohort. I've never heard that word in my life. Yeah. Well, usually. I've never been in a sort of that. Is that really the word you were thinking of? That's great. Cohort. I don't get it. It doesn't, it seems like a made up word. Cohort. What does it mean? Stupid word. It's a group of people. Yeah. It's literally just like the group of people instead of just like group of people cohort. Yeah.

Yeah, so it's like how we call animals, like herds and flocks. We're called cohorts. Good job. What is gray with the Jurassic Colossus? You kind of made me like it when you put it into that framework. What does gray loot mean? What? Gray loot? Well, loot is like a fortnight. Gray, I don't know. Gray is, you know, it's a shade in between white and black.

Oh, yeah. Listen, guys, lately we have been playing a video game, and if you guys can see that chart over there, Cash has eight wins, but that's false. Those are definitely all fake. He added those, but I have four. Can you see it on the camera, or do I need to get it? Every single night. I'll get it. Kinsey and I. Actually, can you get it? My feet are all dirty. Where's my champion belt? For our husbands to come to bed, and they ignore us. I am. Where's my belt? Every single night. You don't fit in the last time.

Yeah. Hey, you know what? Oh, yeah, let's say that story real quick. Yeah. Okay. This is great. This isn't actually a good concept for me personally. Oh, yeah, because you're petty, Matt. Depending on how you tell the story, sure. No, Matt doesn't want me to tell the story because he's the pettiest man alive. Not true. Do we have the belt? That's just not true. I don't know where it's at. They have a WWE belt that the champion gets. Are we filming after this? No. Why? Filming what? Another video. Another pod? Oh, we might. No, we're not.

Yeah, this is for Cash. I'm going to deliver it to him now. There you go. Wow, thank you. Okay, that was crazy. It's kind of a heavy trophy. Can I feel it?

Sure. No, she's going to try to hit me with it too. I'm going to explain this story in short. Yeah, make it short. Don't interrupt each other. Every couple nights a week, we all play Smash Bros. Every single night. We have a tournament every night when we play. Every night. And whoever wins the tournament gets to put their name on the board. So if you win, you're a champion. If you win twice, you're a two-time champion. If you win three times, you're a three-time champion. Sure. There's four of us. Me, Maverick, Alex, and our friend Paige. Are you bored?

Is this story boring you? Yes. Well don't worry, you're not gonna be bored no longer. Yeah, you're not gonna be bored. Not the scoreboard. You're trying to ruin it! He's trying to ruin it! We remember, Mav. Hashtag we will always remember. Can Kate Harper? Can Kate Harper? I will take your face and plant you in this dirt and you will grow like a red fern tree. A red fern tree?

Don't do it. I'm going to keep on. I'm going to keep on. Okay, you can hold it for a second. I'm an eight-time champion on the board. Mallory's a four-time. Sorry, Alex, but Alex is number one. And Pepe's never won either. Sorry, Pepe, if you're over there. But me, I'm an eight-time champion. They hold tournaments when I'm not around. That's how he gets to eight. No, I would be a nine-time if we counted that one. But we didn't count it. Bro keeps on glitching.

I promise you I'll plant your face. Plant her face? Plant her face. Yes. Plant my face. In my pot box. Plant her face. Plant her face is the name of a dope band. Plant her face.

Listen, I don't know much about the Smash Bros. bonanza happening in our home, except I know that it takes my husband every night, and I'm mad about it. Really? Why are you mad? Your husband is enjoying life. He comes to bed every single night, every time, without fail. He comes in, he's like, this is way more fun than Smash. What? Laying in bed and watching TV with me. What's way more fun than Smash? Wait, wait, wait. Everyone stop. Yeah, what? Okay, re-say it, please. Uh...

Please re-say it. This is way more fun than Smash Bros. Why Smash Bros? Okay, re-say it. I want him to come to bed with me every night and watch Netflix. I want him to come watch Netflix with me. Me when I really never want to. I know, don't say it. So many jokes, don't say them.

All right. Sorry, Kate. We're listening to you, Rhea. I just want him to come to bed and watch Netflix with me, and then he'll play Smash Bros. And some nights, we don't get to watch Netflix because he played Smash Bros. too long, and I'm already asleep. Fuck! Crap! Because some nights, I don't play Smash Bros. because we watch TV all night. He does. He glitches every time. Okay. Actually, I take it back. Not if you just spray it on me, I'm going to turn you into a fern tree. If you just do that one more time, I'm going to turn you into a fern tree.

Does he actually go to sleep, though, whenever he goes to sleep? So I don't want to hear any of you girls yelling. Ooh, burn. I don't want to hear any of you girls yelling, no, don't put Harper's face in there, when I fairly warned her right now. Fairly? He firmly warned you. I firmly warned you. So if you hear it all the time. It's not warned. It's warned. Yeah, okay. Big deal.

I fairly warned you. He firmly warned. I firmly warned you. We got so off track.

Yeah, Kate's mad because I take her husband away to play video games every night. But he has the time of his life. Trust me. Every night he's like, I don't want to go to bed. I love Kate, but I don't want to go to bed. You're such a two-faced liar. I've never said that. I've never said that. Alex, be quiet. I've never said that, man. I've never said that. You're such a liar because you come to bed and you're like, I didn't even really want to play tonight. I don't know why I played. You're such a little...

The two boys over here that are thinking I have a blast playing Smash Bros with them every night.

I'm gaslighting them. Okay? I'm gaslighting them. Oh, he's gaslighting us for sure. And look, babe. I mean, I'm an eight-time champion. Of course I have a little bit of fun of whooping them every single night. And how you know I'm a champion is they're literally physically trying to destroy the scoreboard. That's a fake scoreboard. How is it fake, Mav? Cash, you just added those on there. They're making an actual argument over this...

How is this fake? Wait, wait. The other day. A government document. You took a marker and you put them on there. What do you mean how is this fake? Because Alex and Pape will both verify this scoreboard is real. Alex will verify right now that scoreboard's fake, right? Yep. See? Alex's name isn't on the scoreboard, so I'm sure he thinks it's fake. On the real scoreboard, Alex is the champ. Actually, I'm sure all you losers would say is it's a fake scoreboard. Well, but I remember.

remember a couple days ago because they will like play smash bros and then the next morning you know we all do our thing and every once in a while maverick has come out with the switch in hand and they're like that's crazy mav you've been practicing but there was one morning pape and alex were upstairs like in the in this room getting stuff together and pape walks over to the bedroom door to go ask mav a question and he hears that mav's in the shower and

and then he hears map talking and map was like pape was like maps going on and on about his wins in smash right now that was crazy we all heard that matt was in the shower talking to kenzie about how good he is at smash bros no no no no that's not when y'all are done playing at two in the morning then he walks in and i'm wide awake because all i hear for five hours and i got champ on my head you're like bro you're an idiot and i wanted to

King, whatever the names are. You can't play him because you already played him. And then he comes in at two in the morning and then he has to sit there and talk about how he won or how he lost to Cash. I like spitting on myself talking. No, I was listening. Thank you. I'll talk to you then. Yeah, I'm listening.

He has my belt. So when he finishes going on for 30 minutes about y'all's game that I had to stay up till 2 in the morning for, then he sits there and listens to Joe Rogan or Joe Blow, whoever the heck else he listens to. And then we don't go to bed. Bobby Jack Smith. Bobby Jack Smith. And then we don't go to bed till 3 in the morning. Are you too fat for that? And then we wake up the next morning and he continues to tell me about his Smash Bros. Are you the current champion?

False news. Listen. We need a piece of paper right now. What do you mean? I need a piece of paper. Somebody? Anybody? Why? I'm going to make a contract. A contract? On the pod? I don't think we're signing any sort of contract right now. Yes, you are. Hey, if someone else can sign on our behalf, we can sign on your behalf. No. Either A or B.

The games move to Pape's room. Or B. That's doable. There are three options here. B. The games move to Alex's room. Not doable. Or C. The games move to the living room. That's also doable. No, that's... Okay, so there are two options. Alex and Pape's room.

- I like where we're at. - No, no, y'all unfortunately you do have to move. That's like extremely unfair that Kinsey has to listen to you all night. - Unfair, when is life fair? - Unfair, I mean she gets to listen to me die on the cross. - As long as I sleep under Kinsey's bed. - No, you guys, the bare minimum would be moving into Pape's room. That is the bare, bare bottom of the barrel, the least you could do. - When we play right here, Kinsey gets to be closer to the champion every single night, which is me. - No, it's not.

When Mal goes in and debriefs the game, Kansi's probably like, man, I married the wrong brother because Cash is an eight-time champ and my husband is only a four-time champ. I do hear that. When she talks to me at night, we always talk about how Cash is always the better one. That's false news. Fake news. I'm always the champ and I will always be the champ. Kansi's a law-rider. Your wife is being quiet because she knows you're only half as good as me. No, because she has videos of me coming in there with champ on my head. Yeah, four times. I have eight of them.

You have those when I'm not around. They don't count. I have nine when he's not around. You can't hold a championship battle. The viewers don't like it anymore. Nobody cares, but I will say, Kinsey, you are a much better woman than me because I would be flipping my head every night if I was being kept up. I would just start raging. They'd all be like, what's Kate's problem? She's such a rage woman. My problem is you guys. That's what I would say. I'm going to record you later and I'll just play it outside the door. Get out! Yeah.

You guys have to move to a different room, unfortunately. Can't do it. Never could. Never will. Well, Mike can. Maybe Pabst room. That's the only one. Hey, they're taking the TV off again. Oh. Even the TV got ruined. I know what the problem is. Ain't got no water on it. Never. Nope. That didn't work. It's unfortunate. Maybe we can buy another TV. You guys think we can do that? Watch this video so we can afford another one.

Oh, y'all should do some things so we can make some extra revenue. You should subscribe to our channel. That brings us no revenue. Yeah, it doesn't really, but maybe you'll watch more of our videos. Then we'll get a diamond plaque, maybe. Yeah, we could get a diamond plaque if you subscribe because 80% of you that watch these videos are not subscribed. I feel

I feel like every YouTuber that says that says 80%. No, it's true. You can go to the stats and it's like 80% of the people that watch your videos do not subscribe to you. If you've made it this far into the video, then you probably want to subscribe anyways because you want to see more of this. Also... If somebody says that, I don't subscribe. I know. Honestly, I'm like, okay, now I'm not subscribing to you. I only subscribe when I'm like, wow, they put a lot of work into this video. They kind of earned a lot of subscribers. Yeah, guys, look at how much production value we've put in. Look at this. We did this for you. Hey, can we mess with that?

What thing? The watermelon? No, we're doing that next episode because it's going to get messy here. It's going to get messy? Oh no!

I got to plug one more thing. You guys should also go follow us on Spotify. We're trying to become the number one podcast in the world on Spotify. So go follow us on Spotify. What are we at right now? I don't know. We're always like number 10, number 12. But we're trying to become number one. So go subscribe. We were number 10 for all of 2024. We were the 10th podcast of the year. Which is crazy. Not just the month, but the year. Crazy. Were we ever the top two in the month? They said we became number one. But I don't think that's true. I don't remember seeing that.

It did say we did become the world's best. 2025 is going to be an even bigger year. Let's go. What the? She's making fun of you, Maverick. Yeah, that's not how I would say it. Let's go. We were filming a YouTube video one time and Maverick was like mid-sentence and he just looks at the camera and he goes, let's go. No. That was a joke. It was funny. It was funny. I liked it. But now I like unironically I catch myself sometimes by myself I'm like,

I know. I said it to Katie last night in bed. I looked over at her and I was like, let's go. Oh, boy. He, like, picked up his snacks. I've always said that. Why just now? No, it was just funny the way you were, like, you were, like, talking, talking, like, so normal. Let's go. Back to normal. I was like, what just happened? I just, like, broke the fourth wall. I was like, hey, real quick, should we have Chase explain his alien story to Harper? Yeah, he's already explained it to me. Oh, really? Mm-hmm.

I've already gotten on the golf course. Well, I've never been explained it. What's it called? Wait, pause. You've never heard his alien story. Only y'all's versions. Are you being so for real? So Chase got a bad haircut today. Before Chase comes in here, I'm going to tell you guys exactly how his alien story is going to go. Well, you have to explain. No, don't tell the story. No, no, no. I'm just going to say a little bit.

In case, a little bit of context, Chase, our friend, thinks he saw an alien. So y'all be nice to him in the comments, okay? He has always, by the way, believed in aliens and been very convinced there's aliens. And also, he's one of the people that saw it. And if you're a woman over the age of 21, he's a very nice guy, very normal. He does not believe in aliens. Well, he kind of does.

He's gonna say like this he's gonna be like I saw an alien on my golf course and I was like listen He's for real so Don't tell the whole story I'm just gonna say one little bit he's gonna be like the alien was so tall and I was like Did an NBA player move into our neighborhood? Okay, so you get the gist Cash knows the story word for word Yeah, we've heard it like five times somebody grabbed him We don't even need to say that I'll just say it Let me go get him Cash no no no don't walk on the actual real carpet Why? Cause you're disgusting

oh my gosh here can we just can we just phone chasing alex will go hey baby that's don't sell these let's go wait no oh what do you mean oh why i literally just did that oh really he did it way louder decimal was like 12 all right alex is getting chased dude our carpet is so cooked i'm stressed it's fine this is rugs

No, no, no, but everyone's gonna walk off the rug onto our real carpet. No. I don't think so. Chase! Man of the hour! Chase! Chase, welcome to our dating show! Today we are finding Chase a woman! Hey! Alright, Chase. I need a wife. Name, date, and name. She's right here. No, no, no. What do you want to know? Wait, wait, can Alex tell you?

Tell me Alex. Did he tell you what we wanted? Aliens. How'd you know that? I've never been told the story and everybody else has and I've heard lots about it so I would like to hear. Okay. Okay. Cash always makes fun of me about the story but it was some real stuff here so long story short I live on a golf course. Wait not long story short because we have an hour. Okay. Oh. Well we got 20 minutes so. 20 minutes so I'll make it a medium one. Um.

I live on a golf course. I'm riding my Segway. I do the same thing every single day. It's 6 p.m. summer. Still? Still. I'm riding my Segway on the golf course, right? On the trail. Segway definition.

They don't know what a Segway is? Okay, a hoverboard. We'll say a hoverboard with a stick. I'm riding it down the golf course. Yeah, with that. I'm riding it down the golf course, right? I do the same thing every day. I was listening to music. I was jamming out. It was an amazing day. I look to my right into what I think is a person. That's your left, Cash. No, you continue. Okay, yeah, okay. I'm riding the Segway. I look to my right.

And I am freaking out almost instantly because what I see is I think it's an NBA player that just moved into the neighborhood. An NBA player that moved in. I'm not kidding you. I'm not kidding you. Are you mimicking me? Cash doesn't believe me. I saw a freaking alien, okay?

Do you want to know? Keep telling the story. Kind of now. All right. So I'm riding the Segway. All right, Chase. We're all succeeded. At this point, you just say, oh, it's some tall guy. And you think it's a tall guy. I think it's some tall person that moved into my neighborhood. And I'm riding it. I look to the right. My vision's not the best. Keep in mind. Do you go over there a little more? Or do you go farther away? No. So I'm looking across the golf course. Like on the path. There's another path across the golf course. And I'm looking. And I'm looking.

riding the Segway and I look back and all of a sudden I'm like, this person's like 10 feet tall. I'm like, what is this? Right. I do this every day. I'm not, you know, and then all of a sudden I'm riding, I look back again and I really get a good look at this thing. And I see a 10 foot tall, all white, no clothes,

I don't know if it's naked or whatever it was, but no clothes. I didn't see any clothes on it. Wait, like white, white or just like pale? No, like a pale white, head to toe, walking like a Slender Man Sasquatch. Oh my gosh. And my heart drops immediately. You're joking. No. Were you on like shrooms? No. No.

I asked the same thing! I was on nothing, I was on nothing. Besides his hoverboard, that's the only thing he was on. I was on the hoverboard, and so, and I'm not kidding you, my gut drops instantly. I would too, if it's on Naked Man. I am completely scared. 10 foot tall, all white person, right? And so I look back again,

And it's booking it. It's literally its arms doing this. I'll do the motion for everybody. Look. Oh my gosh. He's walking like this. Oh, heck no. No, don't chase me. I'm out. And I'm so scared. Wait, he's coming at you?

No, it was going this way. I was going straight parallel to me. So it wasn't looking at you at all. Instant fear. Like I've never been more scared of anything in my life instantly. It's broad daylight. Like the sun was set and it was beautiful out. Like I was like, this is such an amazing day. And all of a sudden I'm fearing for my life. And I keep going. I get one last good look at it. And it's already halfway around the bend in a fraction of a second. No way. The Sasquatch alien. Okay, but I believe him.

I do too. I believe you saw something. Well, so what happens is I'm riding and I really stop and I squint my eyes and I get a good look at it and I see it's fingers, everything's like this long. It's hands, everything's this long. And it's riding and my segue is pulling, the hoverboard is pulling me backwards because I'm going too fast. And I'm like, I'm about to poop my pants right now. I'm either going to have to hop off of this thing and run for my life or

or I'm gonna die here today is what I thought. So I'm not kidding you, in just a fraction of a second, I was so happy 10 seconds before this,

And that's pretty much the alien story. Wait, wait, what did you do? There's more. There's more. You went home. Okay. Did you see another alien? Wait, how did you get home? Did you leave your Segway? No, no. So the Segway, I stayed on it. And it was coming around the bend. And I just kept going. I didn't look back. I go home. I said, Mom, I saw the craziest thing ever. She's like, oh, my gosh. My cousin is like a conspiracy theorist pretty much, right? I like that. Yeah.

You like that? How old's your cousin? So I go up to my cousin, right? And I said, dude, I saw the craziest thing the other day. And he was like, what did you see? I said, dude, I saw this all tall white, 10 foot tall creature across the golf course path. And he goes, I go, what? He goes, you saw a tall white.

And I was like... A tall white. A tall white. I was like, what are you talking about? So let me get straight. You told your cousin, I saw a tall white. No, Mike. Mike. And he said, you saw a tall white. And he goes, you saw a tall white? And I said, well, what's a tall white? And he goes, look it up right now. I look it up. And I look up the picture of it. And I'm seeing...

A sketched out version of what I saw. Are you kidding? He popped up a picture of it. No way. He popped up a picture of it, yeah. And it's exactly what I described in everything. And he was like, dude, he's like, you saw a tall white boy. He gets on his computer, emails somebody, and the History Channel calls me. The History Channel? Look it up. Linda from the History Channel. She's like the biggest girl in the alien conspiracy things. You saw that? Yeah, I saw that exact same thing. Let me see it. You can pop it up on the screen. Text that to me. I will. You can pop it on the screen. Or I'm texting it to you because I don't have Alex's number. Okay.

But that thing's fingers are pretty long. Yeah. And she interviewed me for like two hours saying it's crazy because you live right next to Wright Patterson Air Force Base. And that's where like they hide the aliens and stuff. And I was like, they hide them. They're like, that's for Area 51. When the first ever UFO crash, like in the United States, they said that they took the bodies right next to where I live. So she was like, it's weird. And she's like, there's tall whites, there's grays. And she's like, they signal fear to you.

I was like, they signal fear. She's like through like telepathy. So I'm riding the segue. I'm just terrified. No, he's, he's, he's signaling it. And that's why I had the instant fear of like, I have to run for my life right now. What did his face look like? Like an actual alien face or normal face? I didn't see a face. I had no hair, no clothes. Like this almost? Yeah. I mean, basically. Oh my gosh. But. It didn't say the tissue box. And when I go home and this is, I said to my mom, I was like. Like this?

Yeah, pretty much. You got the idea. I saw that, yeah. And my mom was like, it's so weird that you're telling me this because when we first moved into the house, she's like, I bought a granite tissue box that has exactly what you're talking about on it. And I was like, what are you talking about? I go to the bathroom and I look at this tissue box and I'm not kidding, I see like a 10 foot tall image ingrained in the granite just doing this. Oh my God.

Maybe it was an ice skater. Wait, wait. Is it supposed to be there? It's like whenever you're looking at granite or like a brick wall and you're like, I see the shape. No, it was carved out. It was supposed to be there. Oh, it was supposed to be there. Oh, my God. No, no. It was just like, you know, it's like natural. It's granite. It just forms naturally. Yeah, see? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it just forms naturally. And there's the creature, just the 10-foot creature that I saw. Oh, my gosh. That's the story of the tall white. Take it. You can believe it if you don't. Why'd you look at me when I saw it?

- You always mimic me when I say that. - 'Cause you know you always mimic me for it. - No, I just think it's a funny story Chase and I like it. - Okay, all right. - Chase, it's not your story. It's the way you tell it. I've never heard anyone tell a story like that. - Really? - I believe it. - You're a good storyteller. - At least Harper believes me out of anybody here. - No, Chase, I've always said I believed you saw something. - I believe you saw something too. - I believe you saw something.

I just ultimately, you're on shribs. That's what I was going to say. Okay, to everybody out there, comment, do you believe my story or not? Or do you believe in aliens or not? Because with all the government stuff coming out, we're going to be seeing some aliens soon. And you're not going to think I'm crazy, Markay. You're going to be the first person I call. I definitely believe you, Shasta. I don't think you're just lying about it. No. And if you say you weren't on anything, I believe you weren't on anything. But I think there's a lot of...

There's a, I don't know what I think. There's a lot of, I don't know what I think. You'll know soon. I told my story. We'll know here in a couple of years when the government discloses it. You'll know soon. Thank you. Dust your feet off. Bye. Wait. Yeah, you come on real quick. Do you want to come on? Quick. Hello.

Watch your socks. There's debris everywhere. Harper. And that couch is very wet. Hey, guys. Meet Harper. This is my new best friend. Harper and Harper. She's in law. She's in fifth grade, right? Sixth grade. Sixth grade, sorry. Get it together. Her name is Harper. She is a content creator, actor, and singer. Yeah. Yeah. Harper and Harper. And don't we look alike? Have you seen an alien? Yeah.

No, I haven't. Yeah? But I totally believe him. It sounded real. It did. And I believe it, like, fully. Yeah. It sounded, the way he spoke, it was genuinely, I don't know. We believe you, Chase. I trust. I do. Everybody comment in the comments, hashtag, we believe you. No, just give Chase the validation he needs, because he feels very made fun of by us, and we don't mean to make you feel like that. I'm not making fun of you, Chase. Nope. You're just a fucking...

Funny storyteller, man. Should we plant that tree? Oh, we already did. It grew. It grew to a big tree. It grew inside Cash's belly button. Oh, that's fun. Yeah. It was fun. Saving the planet. Dead tree. One belly button at a time. Quiet dead. Yep. We got dirt everywhere. Well, before you go, who's your favorite YouTuber? Oh, y'all. Oh, of course. Thank you. The cop out. I'm my favorite YouTuber, too. Have you watched our videos together? Yes. Really? Yes.

Oh my god, I love Salish. Salish Matter might be coming on a podcast episode in... She promised. Like, uh, three months. Hey, we need to get this interview real quick. Have you ever had your heart broken? Um, no. I actually broke someone's heart. No! No way. You broke somebody's heart? No, I'm joking. Wow. That's fine, that's fine. Also, another question. Do you think my lashes are too long? No, they're so pretty. Do you think?

You just bought yourself another five minutes. No, I'm kidding. Oh, yeah. Sorry. So you're telling me you're 11? Yeah. I'm about to be 12. Yeah, she turns 12 next month, but you were 11 and you've never had a heartbreak? She said she's a heartbreaker, Kate. She didn't get her heart. Oh, see, I was opposite. Me too. I was 11 and I had my heart shattered. Oh, it wasn't really shattered, though. It was destroyed. I was...

I could cry just thinking about it. Tell us all about it, Kate. Tell us, Kate. Tell us. Oh. Oh. Listen, don't even get me started. It was sixth grade. Oh. It was 2015. Oh, sixth grade. It was. It was. It was 2015.

maybe 16. I don't even know. I got my first boyfriend. Oh my goodness, you poor thing. No. I had never spoken to this kid ever, but I was in like sixth grade. Wait, then how was he your boyfriend? No, just trust, okay? What is it, Facebook Messenger? No, when I was in sixth grade... Okay, airdropped him. Will you be my boyfriend? I did not do that. Okay, we'll stop interrupting. Yeah. Sorry, sorry. We believe you, Kate. Yeah. You had a boyfriend. I had a boyfriend. Listen, I...

Everybody started dating in sixth grade. And I remember being like, oh, like, no one likes me. Like, I want a boyfriend so bad. And, like, I was watching all the movies. And every girl in high school had a boyfriend. I just wanted a boyfriend. I was like, I just want someone to like me. So, in a very, like, I was not easy on the eyes in sixth grade. Like, I loved it.

Listen. Do we have a picture of Kate in sixth grade? Oh, I got you. I want a pic of Kate in sixth grade. I got you on the ears. She's a bully. I want to sit on my lap. I was just all around. I was a solid 2.5, okay? Dang, Kate. Out of 10? Out of 10, okay? I was not that kind of sixth grade. You were put together, very pretty. I was the opposite. You're fine. Okay.

Like, if I was the guy, I would date her. If I was in sixth grade, like, I was, I thought when I came in, she was, like, in ninth grade or something, but no. That's what everyone thinks. They're always like, are you in eighth grade? Yeah, you definitely seem older. Guess what grade I'm in? Ninth. No.

10th. Yeah. Wow. That is crazy. It does not look like you're, y'all look like the same grade. Y'all do look the same. Yeah. Wait, who's taller? Oh yeah, let's see. Oh my goodness. Let's take a look. A look-see. Oh, she's stepping on, she might have her. Who? Harper's State of the Street. Harper's might have Harper Zilmer. Yeah. No. Yeah, this couch is so cute.

Sorry about that one. Actually, no, that was Matt's fault. Yeah. No, it was her fault. She sprayed me first. Everyone saw. Did you see how mad I was? My hair was... All right, sorry. Sorry, Kate. Look how long his legs are compared to theirs. You were down bad. You were trying to get a boyfriend. Down so tremendously bad. And then I'm assuming this kid was also down tremendously bad. Huh.

That's why he chose me. Yeah. So anyways, I remember like his friend had said like, oh, he thinks you're pretty. And I was like, wow, I've never heard those words before. And so I was like, I need to get married to him. Like that's my husband. He thinks I'm pretty. This is a sad story. In sixth grade? It gets worse. Yeah. So anyways, we started dating in like January, February. I wrote it in my diary. I remember we started dating in February.

And we maybe in the whole two months that we were dating spoke like 10 words to each other face to face. We texted every day. But like if we pass each other in the hallway, we wouldn't talk. We wouldn't look at each other. Like, I don't know. You guys were like secret, like Romeo and Juliet lovers. Everybody knew we were dating. Everybody knew it. So like, did you say goodnight to him? Yeah. We texted. Yeah. Yeah. I think so. See, we think the same thing. Yeah. We're twins. Yeah. Yeah.

So I was like, you know, obviously texting him all the time, but we didn't talk in person. And yeah, I remember always being upset that he would never come up and talk to me, but like I wouldn't talk to him either. So, you know, it's scary to talk to a guy in person. So then anyways, it goes on and on. And this is like side little side thing that shattered my heart. His best friend.

This was really sad, actually. The guy I was dating told his best friend that he thought I was the most beautiful girl in the world. And his best friend responded, if you ever say that again, I'm going to slap you across the face because she's so ugly. Wait, how did you get that out? Because his best friend said that to my best friend and my best friend told me that. And I was like, oh my gosh. You must have been crushed. Who was your best friend? Were you crushed?

It was a different girl. I bet she would. Dude, how are you... Well, that girl needs to... No, it was... How are you not still crying? I have a much better question. No, I actually... If I thought about it hard enough, I think I could cry right now. Like, it's really sad. I don't know why anybody would say that to an 11-year-old girl. That sucks. But besides the point... What if somebody said to you... If you... What if somebody, like, you were dating a guy and you were, like... And then they were, like... Their friend was, like, hey, like, don't ever go up to that girl. She's ugly. What would you do? Yeah, that's exactly what... I would be so mad. Oh, man.

Yeah. It was so mean. So the guy that says that, and I'm like, okay, that's really sad, but it's fine. At least my boyfriend thinks I'm pretty. Man, this is a sad story. I feel so bad for you. You never made me feel bad for you. You always play the victim, but I never buy it.

But this is like, yeah, that was really sad. And so then I'm like, okay, like he does, that guy doesn't think I'm pretty, but like my boyfriend thinks I'm pretty. And then little six year old Kate or whatever you said, sixth grade, sixth grade. Yeah. And then a week later it's, we're having like our little passing period and I'm walking to my next class and

And my boyfriend, who I've spoken to maybe three times in person after two months, comes up to me and he has like three or four of his bros behind him. Oh, he got the squat? He got the squat. To break up with you? He pulled up on me. He was like, they're going to back me up. Listen, listen. He pulls up on me in the hallway with like his bros behind him. And I'm like walking and he comes up to me and I'm like, oh my gosh, he's speaking to me. Like he doesn't do this. Mean character. And I'm like, this is my chance. Like what if he gives me a hug or something? Like what if? What if?

Instead of that, he goes, I'm breaking up with you. No. In front of everybody? Basically the whole school. Yeah, there was like so many kids. At that point. It was like he had told so many people that he was breaking up with me.

And like a word got around he was breaking up with me after third period. Like it was like being the hallway. Kate, you're actually gonna make me cry. I'm really sad for you. I tried so hard not to laugh. No, it's... You're laughing? No, it gets worse. You are a cruel individual. It gets crazy. It gets worse. Just wait. So then... There's no way this story gets worse. Yeah, it gets worse. So he breaks up with me. And instead of just being like, oh...

okay, I'm so in shocked. I'm so embarrassed that it happened in front of everybody. I immediately start sobbing. And I was like early in the day. I sobbed for the entire rest of the day. I cried in every single class. Everybody was like, what is wrong with her? Like my art teacher or like my theater teacher or someone pulled me out of class and was like, like, are you okay? Like, is something going on at home? Like my face was

swollen all day I sobbed everybody knew and I was so embarrassed I was like why am I crying this much over this like it's not that deep and everybody was like kind of side eyeing me and I remember I will never forget this kid I will never ever forget you I'm not gonna crying voices coming are you about to cry yeah what did you tell the art teacher this I had a boyfriend that I said 10 words to and he broke up with me no I

even remember what I told her. I was like, no, like, I'm fine. Wait, wait, wait. Continue what you were saying. It was about to get good. I'm not gonna say your name, but I will always remember this kid, because this was, like, the nicest thing. He was, like, he saw me crying all day. I had, like, multiple classes with this kid. And he, I had, like, kind of been friends with him, but, like, not really. And he was like, what happened? And I just told him, and he was like, well, you just, you really do deserve someone a lot better than that. Like, you don't deserve that, Kate. You're such a... I had the fattest crush on him after that one.

I bet. I was like, please come marry me. Be my husband. I literally crushed on that kid all throughout middle school. I thought he was so cute. He's like, you deserve someone better. She's like, well, there you go. You deserve someone better. Not as good as me, but better. Kate's like, I wonder where I can find that. He's like, no idea. No idea.

Yeah, I was like so in love with him after that. I was like, he's so sweet. Bro, Kate, you're actually going to make me cry. I know. This is so sad. It was really sad. I'm not even close to crying, but that would be, like, if there was a story. Yeah. So is that the whole story? Or is there more? I mean, yeah, that was pretty much it. And well, to top it all off, actually, I forgot about this, but I just remembered. Does it get worse? It gets worse. Oh, my gosh.

So the same day that we break up, I'm like, I've cried all day at school. And finally it's time to go home. So I walk outside and I'm standing with my friend and it was like, it was really hot this day. I don't even know what was happening, but I walk out and I'm like irritated. And I'm like, why is it so hot? Like what the frick? And I said, frick, that does just top it all off. And no, no, no. And a teacher hears it. What the frick? She heard me say, what the frick? And she goes, I like said it pretty loud. She goes,

uh-uh excuse me what is your name and I was like Kate Baker I was like oh wait Kate Marie I was like Caitlin Wentworth that was my name at the time Wentworth yeah Wentworth I was like Kate and I told her and she's like who's your who's your homeroom teacher and I told her and she was like I'm gonna tell her that you said that and on Monday morning she's going to get the message and she's going to call your parents and tell your parents that you swore on school campus and I'm like

Like, I can't. Like, I got too much going on right now. Like, no. And so instead of just being like, okay, yeah. Who does this? Okay, you get in trouble. And she said, your teacher's going to call your parents on Monday. I said, I have my phone right here. Would you just like to call them now? Ha ha ha!

And I hand her my phone. And she calls my mother. The teacher calls my mom off of my phone. I have a story like that. And she's like, I'm out here with your daughter after school. And she just said this. And it's just out of control. It's out of control. And I was like...

I was like, oh, okay. Was this like an old teacher? She was just like a middle-aged teacher. And so then, naturally, my mom's like, well, my 11-year-old just said a bad word at school. Like, I have to take her phone. That's not a bad word. No, and then my parents didn't know I had this boyfriend. So they take my phone, and the same day we broke up, all of this is happening. They take my phone, and they go through it, and they see that I've been texting this guy, and I love him, and he's my boyfriend. And then they pull me into their room, and they're like,

Kate, who is this kid? And I was like, it's just a rumor at school. Everybody made up that we were dating. Like I never, I've never had a boyfriend before. And yeah, so I'm like heartbroken lying to my parents. That's not a good alibi when they have the text messages. That is a horrible day. It was probably one of the worst days of my life. That wasn't just Kate's

First heartbreak. That was her first worst day ever. That was horrible. That was like when I realized the world is not all sunshine and rainbows. Yeah, sometimes it's hot outside. Are you okay? No, I'm so solid now. But if I see you ever again, it's on site. I can see Kendi dying to steal the spotlight right now. She's like, people feel bad for me. Oh my goodness.

I got stories on stories. See, I knew it. She was plotting. All right, well, come back next episode to hear Kenzie's heartbreak. We'll see you guys next time. Make sure to subscribe because 80% of you aren't. Wait, we're actually not letting her tell a story? Bye!