Shownotes Transcript
You've already kissed, so Paige. Oh, kissed. Remember that time you kissed my husband? Do you remember the time?
That was a long time ago, though. We were like practically... Mom, Dad, I humbly suggest you save some money and shop Amazon for back to school. It's for my growth, meaning my body's growing at an alarming rate. And clothes you buy me this year will be very small very soon. Plus, the clothes I love today will be out of style tomorrow. But at least your wallet doesn't have to be my fashion victim anymore.
a few shop low prices for school at Amazon. Hopefully this is helpful. Amazon. Spend less, smile more. She kissed my husband. You kissed her husband? Okay, you probably have to get out. Did you kiss my husband? Yeah, but he wasn't your husband when I kissed him. That's okay. Wait, was it like a make out or just like a peck? It was technically a dare. I think like the first time. Someone dare me! The first time? Yeah, the first time.
I don't like this at all now. I really don't like this. You dared us. I did? Yeah. Hey guys, I dared you to kiss. Yeah, it was a dare the first time. No. The first time.
Is it really hot in here? I don't know. I don't know this question. Oh, but it's okay because I pim-dossed us out because when I kissed Paige... Pim-dossed us out? You kissed Paige? It equaled everything out, you know? Wait. Everything equaled out. Yeah, she didn't think it was fair, so she pecked Paige. So she kissed Paige. We're going to cut that out, right? Right? Like, no! I...
Anyways. I don't think that's equal. I don't think it's equal at all. Okay, so I posted a video a couple weeks ago about how I became best friends with the girl that kissed my husband. Yeah. That's still awkward. It's like the only time we've ever talked about it. My parents don't even know this. This is going to be really weird. Your parents don't know we kissed? No. Hey, speaking of Riz, Cash?
Or Kate, would you say, would you say, would you say Cash has Riz? Absolutely not. Not anymore. What? Whoa. Okay. Not anymore. I can vibe with that. I used to have Riz. Then I got married. Why would I care about Riz? Well, my follow-up question was going to be, can I see Riz, Kate? In action? Yeah. You want to see me in action? Cause like, you know, I'm single now and like, I need, I just need an example. Harper was the one giving dating advice, not me. Yeah. Cash, like what would you do if like. Like if Kate was a random girl in the bar.
The bar. We don't go to the bar. Okay, Kate is a random girl at the park. What do you think? Yeah, I'm riding my scooter through the park. Yeah. You see Kate. There's two low-key popular boys behind me, but not really. I fall for Kate. You see Kate, and you're like, she's just sitting on a park bench reading her book, doing Kate things. What do you do? I would say, wait, you want me to just go off the wrist of that situation? Yeah, so Kate, pretend you're on the park bench reading your book. I'm like reading my book. Cash, you pull up. I'm on my scooter? Yeah. I would say...
I would drive by. I wouldn't say anything. Okay. I would loop back around. And then I wouldn't notice you because I'm still in my book and you have made absolutely no impression. Okay, if you still haven't noticed me, I'll loop back around and then loop back around again just to make sure I think you're actually pretty, right? Get three looks. Whoa. Get three looks, right? He has to check three times to make sure you're pretty. Then I come back the fourth time. I fall on purpose. And I'm like. Oh, my knee. Yeah, I'm whining about my knee, right? And I'm like, look at it. Look at me. I just fell for you.
But then, she offers me, but then, no, it's not over. Then she offers me help up, and I realize she's not popular. So I say, no thanks, and I get back up, and I go on my way. That's called playing hard to get. No, but I can understand why. I mean, obviously, I don't have Riz anymore. I'm married, but back in the day...
I had a Riz. This one girl. Cash had so much Riz, his friends would get Riz just off of him. Yeah, they were Rizin' off my Riz. Not you. Okay, he's never had a Riz. Whoa, whoa! I have great Riz. Mav, I've seen you in action before. When have you seen me in action? At Texas Roadhouse. What? No, no, no. I keep it short. Oh my gosh. Listen.
We're at Texas Roadhouse. No, let me tell the story. Let me tell the story. Okay, wait. For my story, it's way funnier. Listen, we're at Texas Roadhouse. It's lies. He's like, this waitress is, you know, kind of cute, right? She was very cute. Freshly after a breakup. Freshly, he'd just broken up. And I was like, all right. I see you, Mav. Hit on her, right? Let's get this riz going. And she's like, walks by. And Mav goes...
Excuse me, ma'am. Excuse me. No, that is not. That is not what happened. And he started talking in that type of voice. And as soon as he did that, I was like. And Cash told me. I had to close my eyes. I physically closed them like this. That is not true. And I was like, I can't look. That is not true at all. I'll tell you what. What really happened was I kept it short. I'm very short with girls. I said, hey.
I feel like I've seen you before. Where do you go to church? Which was a lie. He never seen her before. No, but I wanted to find out if she went to church. You lied? You lied? No, it's not a lie. About asking if you go to church. No, I didn't. I mean, I guess you could call it a lie. I didn't think of it as a lie. I just wanted to know if she went to church. He lied about church. He's got to figure out if she goes to church before he continues to ask her. That sounds like a lie. But anyway. And then she said no.
Like, no. No, she shook her head. She's like, no, I've never been to church. I was like, oh, okay. We were like, okay, can we get some more water? I was like, I'm not trying to baptize you. I was trying to baptize you. I was asleep. This is when we were dating. I was asleep in my room.
or a guest room at her house. She comes in there and she picks up my phone while I'm sleeping. Guys, we were like two, we were a month into dating. We were like a month into dating. We were like a month or two into dating. She comes in there, picks up my phone and starts looking through it. Because, can I defend myself? Can I defend myself?
Can I defend myself? She caught me cheating. I didn't know how to defend myself. But not from you guys. Yeah, and she caught me cheating. I didn't know how to defend myself. It was really awkward. Oh, can I please defend myself? Bro. No, no, no. So she checks my phone. She says she was just checking something. And then she's like,
Obviously not. Everyone knows I wasn't. She goes down to like a year ago on my Snapchat where I'm texting this girl and I'm literally just texting her like a normal human and I think I called the girl pretty or something. This is before y'all dated? Yeah, and that was it. That was it. And she smacks me while I'm sleeping. She's like, bam! And she's like, what's this? And I was like,
A year? A nightmare? I don't know. A Snapchat from a year ago. And she was mad at me because I Snapchatted a girl a year before we dated. Can I please defend myself? No, because you logged into my Apple ID the other day. What? She did. I said, she said, hey, can I have your iPad? I said, sure, I'll use it if you want to use it, you can. And she said, I said, just switch the Apple ID.
homie didn't just switch the apple id homie decided to link the apple id no i didn't yes she did so now all my photos text messages everything not anymore maverick i literally went and i deleted all of it and i said yeah but and then and then i i get it i get a cash asked me he goes hey kate was showing me some photos uh why did you take
He goes, dude, it was crazy. His camera roll is wild. Why do you take so many shirtless photos? Every morning, this man wakes up. He's not sending them to anyone. He's not working out and tracking his progress or anything. He just wants to admire himself? He literally just wakes up every morning and takes the exact same picture in the exact same mirror in the exact same pose. Listen. Every single morning. I have a reason. Okay? I eat a lot of ice cream. I...
and different things. And one day, I'm not gonna look like this. And I wanna be able to look back and go, oh, a month ago, you looked good. Like, you need to chill. Whatever you've done this last month,
You can't do that anymore. You gotta cut back on the ice cream. I'm chilling now. Right now still. I was curious. That's just the photos. Oh my gosh. Then she decides to go through my text messages with my ex-girlfriend from like two years ago. Like two girlfriends ago. Just to reminisce. Do you want to know why? I need the closure that I never got.
Oh my gosh, you were in a relationship. No, but I was watching it and I had we knew we knew all y'all did was argue That's all that happened. The relationship was like watching a train wreck happen and I was like over and over and over I always wanted to know what y'all were texting especially when you guys went long distance you guys were always just arguing and I was like, oh
I wanted to know what was happening. That's what you were on. And I was on a lifeboat going, bro, your boat's sinking. And you're like, no, it's not. It's fine. We'll repair it in just a minute. It'll be great. It sunk. Listen, should I have done it? No. And I'm sorry, Mav. I mean, I've done it too. You can't just like do it.
Like multiple times? Multiple times? I'm sorry. I've done it multiple times. Multiple times? He'll go through your phone too. Both of y'all. Bro, if somebody's phone is open, if you leave your phone open, he's going through it. You don't know someone until you go through their phone. You don't. You might think you know someone, but you don't. You have no clue who you are. If it makes you feel better, I didn't just scroll through recent text messages. Well, just to make things fair. That was almost cool, but not quite cool.
The crazy part is though, is like I said, you don't know someone until you go through their phone and you're about to go through the phone and you're not gonna find anything. Oh man, I'm already locked out. You know our password. I couldn't remember it. Why didn't you just ask? No, listen, I apologize Maverick. That was the old me. That was last week. Anyways, can I defend myself about hitting cash that one time?
Yeah, go for it. Go ahead and try. She still hits me. No, I don't. You're going to make the cops come after me. I'm sorry. She doesn't hit me. Literally, I'm going to have like
freaking the FBI show up my door because everyone's gonna be like Kate Baker abuses her husband no she no I don't doesn't anyways the reason the reason being was I was a curious gal and we had been dating for a month and I was like oh I might as well go see because I knew y'all need to remember that cash and I had like talked for years and we were always talking and always talking about how we wanted to
date each other but he was too busy working so we couldn't and i knew he was talking to other girls so i was like well i might as well go see what like what other girls he was talking to and i found that bro and i was mad like you knew i talked obviously when you were single but you were like stringing me along still but that's besides the point i just wanted to know what kind of things you were saying and i remember what made me mad mad enough to go wake him up from his nap what
what made me mad, what made me mad was I remember I always would wait for him to FaceTime me at night. I would like text him like, Oh, like I'm going to bed. Like just FaceTime me whenever you can. And sometimes he would FaceTime me at three in the morning. Cause that's when he would be going to bed and I would wake up. I'd have school the next day. I'd wake up and I'd talk to him cause I wanted to talk to him.
This is before you're dating, correct? This is before we were dating, yes. So he would FaceTime me every single night. Every single night he FaceTimed me. But again, this is before you're dating. Yes, and then... Not before we were dating. No, but you can't. That's just rude. So if anything, all my FaceTime is for charity work at this point. He didn't owe you anything. Then there would be every once in a while, there would be a night where he didn't call me at all and I'd wake up the next morning and I'd be like, huh. And then I'd be like sad all day because I didn't get to talk to him. I find out.
One morning at like 6 a.m., he texts me and he was like, hey, we were out. We played video games all night. I'm going to sleep now. Lie. Liar. Liar. Pants on fire is what you were. I just twisted the truth a little bit. He went. I found that same day. I found it. He had been texting a girl. He was like, hey, I'm outside. At 6
- To play video games, okay? We're about to run up some Apex. - And then I saw the text like a few hours later and he was like, "Hey, so good hanging out with you." - Yeah, we got a lot of dubs, okay? - Bro. - Yeah, so then I was like, I felt played because that was only like, what? - You did get played. - You were kind of played. - You were played. - That was like a month or two before we started dating. So it was like only three months ago I was hurt anyways.
Silly silly me and everyone told me to stop talking to cash. Don't act like you weren't talking to other people too That's literally called. It's called the talking stage for a reason. I wasn't. Talking. Oh. To multiple other people. Yeah, what about when I had my very first concert? I found this out yesterday Yesterday? Yesterday. Listen. I had my very first when we had our very first concert. Oh, I'm excited. We had our very first concert ever in Texas, right?
And you thought you'd invite your crush? I thought I'd invite my crush, you know, show off a little bit. Yeah. No, you were not. And then. Okay, homie. Make all the other guys jealous. There was no other guys there. It was all girls. Okay. To make her jealous. Wait, actually, only girls came? Yeah. I mean, it was like. It was girls only event. No, I'm kidding. Oh, oh, oh. No. There was, dude, it's just a lot of our fans were like. Girls? Yeah. Like. Oh. Anyways. Okay. Before my show.
she was hanging out with another dude the same day same day oh no but i kind of forgave her a little bit because the night before the show i was hanging out with another girl so we were each doing it and dude i think i was this girl i didn't know i never met her my guys are such bad influences i know don't do what we did yeah don't do it i i was i was like i just turned 16 and i had this girl on
I don't know what I was texting her on. Never met the girl in my entire life. She was like, oh, come hang out or whatever. Come hang out. I thought I was going to walk through the front door of this girl's house. No, no, no. She was like, you got to climb onto my fence. Climb onto the roof. Walk around. Go over the house and the roof and come to the other side. So I was like 1 a.m. I climbed the fence. I climbed onto this girl's two-story house. Climbed.
climbed all the way around the house to the other side and then so you're like you're like wait what fence i think i'm on the wrong roof but you're out there just climbing roofs and then knocking on windows hello i had to go through this really funky window and then i was like why didn't i just go through your bedroom window and she's like my dad nailed it shut
Oh my gosh. This girl's got a problem. He had me hanging out at home waiting for him to come around and he's going to freaking meet up with delinquents who have to have their windows bolted shut. To be fair, I literally thought I was just going to hang out with her and I was going to go through her front door. I did not know I was going through her backup window. Her backup window. Because her first window was bolted. She didn't tell me that in the description to get there. That's crazy. The first window will be nailed shut.
You must find a way around. Oh my goodness. Well, how long did you hang out with that girl? They were just friends. Guys and girls can be just friends. No, I just that night. I never saw her again. Well, no, like I mean, like how many hours specifically were you at her house? Yeah, I don't know, like four hours. Oh, that makes me feel better. That seems friendly. You were at my house for a long time.
Do y'all think guys and girls can be just friends? No. Dude, no way. Yes. We've seen it right here. You guys hate each other. Yeah. Listen. Okay, when you're... Okay, I think if guys and girls... Oh, this is such... People are going to get so mad. Guys and girls can be just friends, but... There is... I was going to say it.
one of y'all is ugly. Is that what you're gonna say? I was gonna say, one of you, one of them always likes the other one. I'll say that. Yeah. Yeah, it's not ugly, but one of y'all
Someone's definitely liking the other one. Yeah, there's tension there. And there's like, especially in a relationship, like there's no need for me to go be friends with guys that Cash doesn't know. Why are you giving us like a relationship advice? We were just asking a question. Well, because you, if guys and girls could be just friends and I would have guy friends too that weren't your friends. That's not true because I don't think guys really like hanging out with girls. That's Kat. I really, dude, you hang out with her all day.
I tell her this every day. All the time I tell her, I say, Kate, isn't it weird? Like guys and girls, they only want to hang out with the same sex. Like I only want to hang out with dudes. No, you hang out with her all day. Well, if you let me finish. I try to get you to hang out with me. I said, guys only want to hang out with guys. That's all they want to do. Yeah. Unless it's like their girl. And then like the girl they're going to spend the most, the person they're going to spend the most time with in life, they want it to be a girl.
But every other time they go hang out with anyone, they want a dude. Yeah. Isn't that weird? No. What? Do you want me to explain? No, no, no. I'm good. No. I'm saying you hang out with dudes and dudes, I'm sorry, no dude is straight up front of the girl. That's not a thing. Straight up friends with a girl? No.
They like her. Yeah. They have some sort of like interest. I'll say this. That's not quite true. I am just friends with some girls. They like you. Yeah, they do like you. But you also, okay. No, no, no. You say you. There's this maybe. I mean, she's like.
65 so I hope she doesn't like me I hope she doesn't like me bro yeah Matt will go dancing sometimes and me and Sheila we'll go get private dance rooms and do practice together yeah so I'm saying practicing dancing is not being friends I'm saying being friends someone you would hang out with and invite them over to your house like no I'm not Sheila's I love you Sheila no not Sheila I'm just talking about me coming over well no Matt will come back sometimes she got candy in her purse Sheila definitely got candy in her purse
Maverick comes home from dancing sometimes and he's like, guys, this girl I danced with last night, she has four kids and she's on her second husband. Like, literally... What does this have to do with anything? You just dance with, like, grown, 50-year-old women who have four children. Harper, what are you doing? Look, look, look. You know what I was thinking while we were sitting here talking? Harper's actually looking older.
Oh my gosh, I know. No, no, no, no. Because Harper, I was looking at her videos from when we first met and Cash and I the other night were like, she's literally grown so much in like nine months. Maybe not. Maybe not like upwards. You just look older. But like your face. I do? You look more mature. Okay, before I started, you started to talk to me about Harrison and I said, hold it. Let's talk about it on the pod. What's up? So yeah, we're talking again. Of course. Okay. Who would have thought? Like,
Yeah, I'm really excited. You're just playing games with him at this point. No. He's playing games with her. No. There's lots of games being played. Harper, it doesn't matter if y'all are talking. It matters if he's talking to other girls or not. No, he's not. He's not. I feel like you're playing. No, no, no. No, no, no. You know what? I've started not to believe things other people say because I need proof, obviously. Obviously, if Paige said, oh, yeah, Cash is cheating on you and me.
Like, obviously you'd be like, you'd be like, oh, that's like, no, no, no, he's not. I need to see proof. Yeah. Right. So I don't think I would believe it. Well, I wouldn't need proof because I would know it's not true. Yeah, exactly. So I'm not, I'm going to cheat. I would never cheat. I was waiting for it. No, no, but literally like if somebody has watched every single piece of podcasts and club video we've ever posted, you get it.
And so you should please go collect all those and tag us in. I would never cheat. I would never cheat. Make a montage. Yeah, I want a montage of Cash saying he would never cheat. Harper, does it count as evidence if he's like, you know, with you and he says you should go because I'm going to another girl's house? That was like before we were starting. That was so Halloween. That was in
We're at Thanksgiving now. We just started being a thing a week ago. Oh my gosh. Okay, so wait, wait, wait. You're telling me y'all are a thing? Yeah. What about the other girls? We're talking. No, no, no. Wait, like boyfriend and girlfriend? No, no. We're talking. But what about the other girls? The other girls? He just ghosted them. Harper, hold on. Do you really think? Yeah. Just to clarify, the talking stage? For me, it doesn't exist. I'm talking to multiple girls.
Okay. Until we have that DTR where we're like, no, no, no, we're dating. The talking stage definitely exists when you're in high school for sure. Well, we're not dating because he hasn't asked me to be his girlfriend, but we're not... If he did, what would you say? Yes, duh. I'd like to...
I've liked him for nine months. Like, uh... No, literally. This kid, see... I don't like Harrison because... Why? I want to have him on the pod. Because the kid is cute. But I don't want the girls here. I just want me and you to interrogate him. Yeah, no, listen. The kid is cute. And he knows he's cute. Okay, I shouldn't say that, actually. Hold on. Yeah, no. Harper thinks Cash is cute. Cash, you think a little kid is cute? No, no, no. Cash is cute. No, no, no.
bro no listen harper that's how you get off his pr list by the way i love him i'm following you on instagram that's weird listen i should probably um i'm gonna add him on snap james charles scandal i only added him on snap because he said he had a boat but he does not have a boat so you're gonna use the 14 year old boy i told him that i said do you promise you have a boat
And he was like, yeah. And then I show up. He takes his pinky promises seriously. Don't say, I promise. You have to stick your pinky out. I did that. I did that. Pinky promises. And then I showed up to his house. I had a sea-dew and he lives on the lake. A jet ski. People don't know what a sea-dew is. I had a jet ski. I drove to his house because his house is on the lake and I'm on the jet ski. And homie's in a paddle boat. I don't know.
A paddle boat. And right next to him was a nice boat. And I was like, can't we take that boat? He's like, when I heard that from my parents, I was like, I turned my jet ski right back around. And I went back to my side of the lake. No way. No, what I was saying is the kid is good. Look, there's not really a good way. The kid is. He looks not ugly. He's a handsome boy. Handsome boy. And he knows he's a handsome boy.
Yeah. So he just keeps playing all these women. I know. But the thing is... Yeah, but it sounds a lot like someone I know. He sounded like someone I know. He posted it. He posted it. Wow. What do you mean? I almost remember another 14-year-old doing the same thing. No, no. Not me. Not me. Kay remembers, right? Oh, I sure do remember. I remember a boy that was good-looking with millions of followers behind him, too. So he had a huge advantage. Everyone here thinks I'm good-looking?
Nobody said that. I said good looking. My point was going to be you had followers and so girls were just trying to get clout. Not anything to do with you being handsome. My fans found him, by the way. They know that he's Harrison. You said, we're going to call him Harrison. Yeah, but they found him. Wait, his real name is actually... I'm so stupid. I really thought it was Harrison. No, his real name is one letter off. Well, actually, it's like...
Wait, so do your fans leave like hate comments and stuff? No, they like him. Wait, so he literally is getting out for you. I wanted my. I have a quite. Oh, he's literally. Oh, gosh. Your context right now. Because he's. No, because he literally.
like okay finally i'm getting my followers i'm getting my followers and then and then and then he's gonna be like just kidding i'm done and then yeah he's gone forever well he barely has any followers he's like three thousand no but he did then you're gonna date and then you're gonna post six off with him and then he's gonna get followers i was there harper i did the same thing i said lots of follow you but then you never get out of it oh wait whoa i'm kidding wait a second
Hold on. I'm just happy that she's acknowledged that I gay for all her followers. Yeah. I remember she got mad that one time. Yeah. I said, Kate, I made you famous. No, you called me a paid actor. That was improvised.
No, that was actually word for word. I can acknowledge that the only reason I have followers is because I started dating Cash Baker. Thank you. That's all I wanted her to know. I've always said that. I've always said that. But you know, the thing is, he texted me. He said, the only reason I'm not dating you right now is because... I don't want to hear it. No, it's because people will think I'm using you for clout.
Oh, he's so pure. Harper. Yeah. Harper. Yeah. Yeah. That's an excuse. Yeah. That's not good enough. No, because the only reason I'm not dating you now is because you don't, I don't want to use you for clout. Um, he can date you and just not have you post about him. Harper, you better lock him in before Kristen's break is here. No. Yeah. He said, he said he wants to get matching PJs and stuff. So, Oh, that's good news. Oh, matching PJs. So my question, um,
Are you allowed to have a boyfriend? Yes. Have you had a boyfriend before? Yes. In sixth grade. No, no, no. Okay. But that's like sixth grade. No. Like now you're in high school. Like now, like would your mom and dad allow you to have a boyfriend? Yes. Would they like allow y'all to like go out on dates and stuff? Nope. What? Absolutely not. I can't wait to have Harrison on the pod. Oh my gosh. Would you want him on the pod? I want a guys only episode though.
We gotta figure out if he's good enough for our daughter. Yeah, I'm basically his daughter. I spend 24 hours. Maybe little sister. I don't like daughter. It feels like daughter. It feels almost like daughter. I'm literally like family. Think about it. When have you ever sat down with your sister and been like, oh, you're getting so big and I recognize it. Because I don't have a little sister. I have two gay dads.
What? No. Right? He's married. Oh, yeah. They're brothers. Sorry, guys. We're literally related. Two dads. But since y'all are brothers and I'm your daughter, it's therefore y'all are two dads to me. Why would you say that? But not gay. They're not gay. Wait. They're gay happy. Like, happy gay. That's what I thought we were talking about. It's that time of the season. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. You know the song? It's like, I'm gay. The Christmas song? No, no, no, no.
I know what you mean. It's like, it's like, joy to the world. My gay apparel? Yes! That's it. Gay apparel. La la la la. Every time I heard that song when I was 10, I was like, hey, it's that gay. When you heard that song, you sang that song, buddy. Huh? I know. I was always like, why are we singing? Gay. Did you know we have a Christmas song? I don't know why we're doing it, but everyone's doing it. Wait, what? Y'all have a Christmas song? Yeah. Like, like Santa tell me if you know. Oh my gosh. We do have a Christmas song. Go stream it. You just sang it.
I thought you were talking about our gay apparel. I thought you were talking about when we were like nine and we were like doing it with kids. At the nursing home. I'm going to play Harper just part of it. You got to hear how crazy this is. We have a Christmas song that we were paid by Sony to hop on like their track or their Sony was putting out a kids like pretty much a kids bop Christmas album and they paid us to hop on like their album as like a kids bop person. It's not kids bop. It was Sony's version of it and they paid us to like be on the song
So we came on the song, and then they just randomly gave us a random Christmas song, and we sang it, and I don't like it. And they got the worst one. I'm so sad that this is out. This song is actually not good at all. Is it like the embarrassment of your career? It's our worst song we've ever done. Oh my gosh. Oh no. You guys are going to have to pop this up on the screen. And they made us wear outfits and dance a certain way, and they were like, make these faces. Oh!
Yeah. They made me do that. Yes. Yeah. Turn it off. Turn it off. Oh, yeah. Y'all want to hear Kate's first kiss? Let me tell you real quick. It's not with Cash. This one's wrong. No, wait. Let me tell my first kiss story. No, I'll tell you your first kiss story. No, you don't even know my first kiss story. Okay, you can tell the actual kiss, but let me tell them the lead up. So, me and Kate are talking.
Okay, wait. No. What did I just say? Listen. I'm going to tell the story. Cash and I had known each other for a couple of years and we on and off would like text and FaceTime. Okay? Yeah. And we were like 13, 14. 10, 11, 12. Yeah. We met really young. We're talking. I had a Samsung phone at the time. Exactly. I had a Samsung. So I had to get on house. You still liked it?
I know. I had a Samsung and still was risen. Do you know how much of a turnoff it was to have the house party and not be able to FaceTime? You're lucky house party was trending at the time. Yeah, house party was trending. So we're on house party. And I don't know if you guys have ever been on house party, but it pretty much just puts your FaceTimes on blast. It tells you who people are FaceTiming and everything. Yeah, it's pretty funny. All right, Cash, I got to go to bed. I'll see you later. Bye-bye. Bye.
All of a sudden, she's in another house party with some guy. Don't say names. We'll call him Nick. She's in a house party with Nick. And I was like, that's weird. That's suspicious. Because you're supposed to be in bed. And for some reason, I didn't think much about it. But anyways, then...
Did we just stop talking? Is that what happened? No, no, no. What happened? Guys are so different than girls. Oh, I remember what he goes. She's in another house party with another guy. Okay. We just went to bed. What happened was I had forgotten to lock the room because you can lock the house party groups and you can't see who you're in a house party with. So she was trying to cheat but she was miserable at it. I wasn't cheating. We weren't
even dating yeah we were like 13 but you were like you were like psychologically cheating no no listen yeah i was i had just started eighth grade if you weren't cheating then why would you why would you try to lock the party why did you lie this happened when i just started eighth grade and i was trying to decide i was like okay i go to school with this guy i really like him a lot but i also really really like cash but cash lives in oklahoma and i see this kid every day in science class so i i
I weighed my options and I said, obviously the smarter choice is to go with the guy that lives here. But she didn't tell me her choice. She just kept playing me. Yeah, I just kept going back and forth. And the next thing I know...
She is dating this guy, right? I didn't know that. Yeah, and then she kisses him, right? No, listen. No, yeah. No, listen. Can I at least tell my first kiss story? Okay, yeah, go ahead. First kiss story. Picture this. After an eighth grade volleyball game. My mom. After an eighth grade volleyball game.
we're standing outside waiting for our parents to come pick us up. Eighth grade. I feel like that's so young. Yeah. I was like barely 13. I had like just turned 13. And it was like the beginning of eighth grade year. That's crazy. And he like...
Like, we're, like, I see, like, his parents pull up or something, and he, like, kind of, like, side hugs me because, you know, we're in eighth grade. And so side hugs me, and I look at him, and he looks at me, and he goes in for a kiss, and I swerved my head because I was like, no. And then he literally was like, I was about to kiss you. And I was like, no, really? Oh. And then I just looked up again, and, like, we went, like,
And that was it. And then I went home and I like, I thought about it. I was like, that was so beyond awkward. And I've never said it out loud. And now I'm saying it out loud and it's bringing back the awkwardness. So that was my first kiss. During that, she was playing me. I was. And then once they broke up, she came running back. I did. Well, no. And like when she was like 14. Wait, no.
Because I was still dating him. Oh yeah! Oh my gosh! Yeah! My first kiss, she was dating him. No, no, no, no. You were a cheater? I told you she's a cheater. No, not your first kiss. Are you kidding me? Listen. Oh, my first hug. His first hug. Wait, wait.
Dude, I can't even remember my first kiss. And you're like, my first hug. No, it was a long hug. How long do you think this hug was? I mean, four hours. What? It was a four hour hug. I need y'all to understand. So I, Cash's cousin is my best friend. She's been my best friend since I was like six. Slow down. I'm sorry. So eighth grade,
Eighth grade spring break, I'm still dating the same guy that I left Cash for. I find out Cash is coming into town over spring break, and I'm like, heck yeah. And I'm like, shoot, I still got a boyfriend. But...
And I was like, yeah, coming into town. And I actually, I didn't know she had a boyfriend. So that's not me. So then that night I'm laying in bed with my two best friends and we're all about to fall asleep. Cash had come downstairs and was in the bedroom, like talking to us. And he was like sitting on the edge of the bed, not sitting. He was on the ground on the edge of the bed where I was laying and
And we literally are like- - The other two girls are asleep. - The other two girls are dead asleep. And we start like flirting with each other. Like it was awkward flirting. This is like dead middle of the night, like literally like 2:00 AM. Like the parents are asleep. Nobody knows this is happening. My two best friends are sleeping in the bed next to me. - Oh.
just lays over me and we literally just sit like that. Yeah, I just put my arm over her like this. And he's on his knees for like four or five hours. I was on my knees by the bedside because there's three people already on the bed and I'm just on my knees for four hours just hugging her like that. And I literally in my head, and he knew I had a boyfriend too. I did and that's why I didn't kiss her because I was like, she has a boyfriend.
But also, she has a boyfriend. Why is she four-hour-ing and hugging me right now? And then... So I was, like, hoping you were going to... It doesn't really sound like a reciprocated hug, though. No, I was hugging him. I was loving it. No, she was hugging me back. Like, literally, I remember being able to hear our hearts, like, pounding. I remember that, too. It was loud. What is going on? What kind of... No, Matt. Y'all have, like, some euphoric experience hugging each other. Matt, why is this weird? I literally... It was, like...
It was like the longest... It's like you're one of the Avatar people and you like connected. Yeah. And so I was like really... I remember hoping like that you would kiss me, but I was also like, but I still have a boyfriend. Like that's not right. Yeah, that's the only reason I did it. But then when he got up to leave in the morning because my friend's mom was going to come wake us up because... Poor guy.
Oh, he does. I don't even, I, he never, I never even told him. Cause like we broke up. Is this Nick's first time hearing about it? Probably. And so then, um, Cash like gets up. I think Nick speculated. And he, and he kisses me on the forehead and he walks out. And then like the next day I told my two best friends about it. And I was like, yeah. She was like, Cash has so much Riz. Yeah. He did have Riz. I still don't think that's Riz. A four hour hug is like, it's like the opposite of Riz. At 13, 13,
- Yeah, 13, that's pretty crazy. - In the middle of the night, first of all, someone needed to be guarding that. I don't know how that happened. - What, the door? - Yeah, like somebody needed to be at that door because every time- - Yeah, it was at my uncle's house and he was like, "Guys upstairs, girls downstairs." And he thought the stairwell just disappeared in the middle of the night. - He thought it was magic. Like him saying, "All right guys, you stay upstairs. Girls, you stay downstairs." 'Cause it was always like a full house.
Like, it was always like... There was always like 20 people there. Yeah, there was always like 20 people like hanging out. Like a bunch of guys, a bunch of girls at like 13, 14, 15 years old. So... Yeah. And so... But anyways, moral of the story, me and that guy from eighth grade ended up breaking up like two or three weeks later. And so then... That's Kate's first kiss. Harper, listen. I don't think... I feel like you and this Harrison guy... Yeah. I feel like you're cutting him too much slack. I feel like he's not...
I mean, keep going. Sorry. I don't mean to cut you off. I just feel... Oh, he made a TikTok about you? Yeah. Oh, that's adorable. Listen, I don't... I don't... I don't... What? I don't think he's taking this as serious as you are. No, he is. Is he? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Is he really? No. No.
No. Because he will be publicly humiliated if he's not. Well, no, we're not going to publicly humiliate the kid. No, no, we're not going to, but someone else will. Who? Who? Who? Me? Yeah, you. Yeah, I will. No. Oh, okay. No, don't publicly humiliate anyone. Well, I will if he doesn't like me. No, you won't. You'll turn the other cheek. Does Harrison go to church? Yes. He went to church with me once. So. It's romantic.
i'm kidding he didn't that was crazy i was waiting no because i i'm i'm planning on asking him one so no but he does go to church yeah he does so okay but harper i just i just i really can't get past how much money you were spending on him that's what really yeah that's bothering me still you want to know you want to know i got a story for you story time well what do you
Let me go in on details on this. I know all about this, Harper. Listen, I've spent thousands of dollars on girls. Oh, and I tried to tell him. Oh, did I try to tell him? How much money have you spent on your wife? Not very much. The difference is, she's my wife. He was doing it for girlfriends. Listen, Harper, I bought...
literally helped buy cars for girlfriends I helped that can't be good man yeah I clothes dresses oh my gosh Harper one time rings he was looking at dresses they were like $400 dresses and we were like what are you doing that for like why are you buying a $400 dress he was like oh I'm just gonna like take her out to dinner and I did her did you hear that I
a dinner one he bought four road trips for one dinner on top of that the dinner was gonna be like one two hundred dollars which i'm completely against by the way um i don't know why any human should ever spend more than i'll give you max fifty dollars a plate yeah max fifty dollars a plate no hold on let me i gotta get drinks ew your butt in that yeah what you don't like my butt
No, actually, I float in that chair. Let me tell you something. Just like it's supposed to be. If you ever go on a date, so two people, if there is two people and that bill is ever over $100, many times that's happened to me. You got scammed. You are scammed and got. Got. Got. No, you're got. You have been got by the...
Restaurant. Restaurant. And they sold you... They said, come to our restaurant. We're fancy. We cook the steak better. No, they don't cook the steak better. Listen, you gotta understand. I'm not God. You are. My girlfriends have been God. Okay. And they enjoy that. Okay, Maverick. So I would take them out there. Okay, Maverick. I mean, I want to do the most... Have you ever seen me go there by myself? How much...
How much is the most you've ever spent on a date? Like beginning to end? Like everything? No, no, no. Like a restaurant. Like the meal. Like the whole bill. Wait, no, no. I want to hear a date too. I want to hear both prices. Okay. First start out with the meal. On a meal? Probably like $250. Oh! Oh!
For two people? For two people. How did you spend that much without getting drinks? You get steaks, you get dessert, you get an appetizer. Guys, that's easy. Yeah. It's really not that hard when you go to a nice restaurant. Bro, we've been sitting at a high rise looking over the city on like the edge of like this glass building. Yeah, that's pretty nice. Yeah. I mean, I guess if it's nice. I mean, in Las Vegas, my family had pretty nice dinners and like we try to treat ourself. Right?
Yeah, but your family's rich, Harper. That's different. No, no, listen. Maverick, if you spent $250 on a dinner, you realize you could have went on like four, five dinners? Yes, but to the girl, the girl... Listen, like I said, me personally, I'm totally fine going to freaking Starbucks and just getting a lemon cake and calling it a day. It's a lemon loaf. Okay, well... I actually had one of those yesterday. But the...
The girl loves... The girls just always love to get dressed up. It makes them feel special. It makes them feel important. Yeah, it does. I get that. I do. I like 100% get that. It's not for me. You gotta understand that. And this is why I married Kate. Say what you're about to say, whatever it is. I hope I'm right. She said she gets it. No, I get wanting to get dressed up and go out to a nice dinner and feel special. And it ends there. And now... No, no, no, no, no, no. But...
I wouldn't be like, oh, I need a new $400 dress for this dinner. I need it. No. I'd say, we're going to spend $200 on dinner. You wouldn't. But imagine Cash shows up with a nice dress and he's like, hey, put this on. But you weren't like that. It was she wanted the dress. No, I did that. That was me. She didn't ask for the dress? No. I feel like Kate wouldn't like that either, though. Okay. Well, one, because I have a concept of money.
I can acknowledge that a $400 dress is absurd and I don't need that for one dinner. I would say, what are you doing? Return that. But if you pay with math, it's a lot cheaper. Or I mean, if you pay with a, what's that? No, I just, I just know that I have a lot of expensive dresses in my closet that I hardly wear. Yeah. And I would say cash. Why would you need that? Why do I need that? Like I have so many nice dresses. This girl had a lot of dresses too. That's what a normal human says. This girl had like three closets full of dresses. What? Like Sherry Hill. Like it was probably really not necessary. Okay. I want to take it back.
I'm not talking about the dress. But it didn't make her feel good. I'm talking about the meal. Would you feel satisfied, Kate, if I took you on a date and we spent $250 for one meal? I would feel really guilty, honestly. That's what I'm saying. I would feel really bad. I didn't feel guilty. That steak was delicious. Oh, $250 for a steak. I surprised my girl. Yeah, think about, think about
Think about how far that $250 could win Africa. Listen, let me explain this to you, all right? That's literally all I think of money. Africa, my friend. Pre-date. You ever watch Mr. Beastful Empathy Channel? Okay, all right. For real. Listen, just to get perspective, like that date in particular, I don't even know if that was my most expensive date I've went on, but that date was about $300 for the dress. Okay. Okay.
And then picked her up and we valeted the car. So that's another like 20. You valeted a car? Oh my gosh. You valeted a car? I mean. Why would you not walk? Bro, because it's a long walk. Yeah. They did that on purpose. Three blocks? She got heels on and it was cold. It was winter. Take them off.
valet in a car is wild dude whoever pulls up to the valet and goes you know whoever pulls up to the valet and goes i'm gonna use it no do you use valet only a few times it's different for me yeah if you're unloading gear for an event okay yeah unloading gear i'll pass do it if you need it because you have like a bunch of stuff to unload for a walk
Help me walk. No, man. I get you want the whole night to feel special and stuff. Yes. All right. So listen. So we're $300 in for the dress. Then we got...
We got a reservation at a nice restaurant. Wait, which one was it? 250. Was it Perry's? I think this one was Perry's. Yes. 250. 300. 550. So. Plus valet. 560. No, no, no. There's more. So we're at like 550. And then. No, 560. Wait, 550 already? Well, we're at 250. We're at like 300 for the dress. We're at like 200-ish. 200-ish for the. All right, 250 for the meal and valet.
Okay, that's probably about... So then... No, that's about... Yeah, 550. Okay. And then... And then we went to the movies...
The date goes on? Yeah, so then that was probably like another like... No, the movies? And then you know I splurged at the movies. Like, I love the movies. Yeah, the movie's 50 for you. The movie's about the experience for you. So that's another 50 bucks at least. 600. 600. But what about the gas? It was an electric car, so we're good there. Well... Yeah, he charges at my house, so I pay for half his gas. Yeah, okay.
And your wife uses half the water and electric. All right, so $600. Let's see. Sorry, I didn't mean to be like your wife. That was wrong. Continue. That's pretty messed up. Yeah. Six something. So we're at $600. I'm trying to think if there was anything else. I don't think I bought her earrings or anything for that one. You know the most I've ever spent on a date?
I don't even know. How much would you say? How much? I can't even think about like our most expensive date. Because I don't think we've been on one. I think we've only been on a normal date. Well, Hillside's pretty expensive. It's like $15 a meal. Oh. Yeah, that's like. I thought it was a nice. It does feel nice. No, we go in there. Doesn't it feel nice? It feels really nice. We go in and we're like, this is like, it feels like a high-end restaurant. Every time we go in there, we're like. The first time
went there with my family it was like right when it opened I was like whoa this must cost like a hundred dollars per person yeah no it's only like fifteen dollars yeah but it's so normal for food but it feels really nice in there let me put this in perspective for you you paid that much for one night yeah that was literally a five-day carnival cruise for one person oh and you're trying to tell me it was special it was about to explode
I didn't say it. It was a waste of money. Okay. Yeah. Listen, first off. And you're not even with the girl. That's funny.
What I'm getting to is... Biggest waste of money I've ever seen. That's the whole point to bring it around full circle. Did she pay you back? Did she pay you back? Full circle. You're spending too much on Harrison. No. Because listen here. At least you're using your own money, right? Yeah. I didn't have the decency to do that. I was 13 years old and I was with my 13-year-old boyfriend and I found out he was getting me a James Avery ring. And it was probably like... Was it him? No. Oh. It was...
It was probably like a 70, $80 ring. And that was like really nice when you're in eighth grade. Like what 13 year old girl needs an X ring like that from her boyfriend. So I was like, mom, like I have to match this. I have to do, I have to do better, but I had no money. And I got him like an NBA Jersey that was like $120 and I didn't have any money. And so my parents paid for it. And my mom was like, we really just like, can't be spending that much on boyfriends and stuff. And I was like, Oh, but we have to, that's so guilty. But because I literally,
It was like, oh, he's going to make fun of me if I don't spend that much. Or he's going to talk about it to his friends. And I was like, I don't want to be embarrassed. And my mom was like, what if we got him something else that's not as expensive? And I was like, nope. Has to be a jersey. And then we broke up. But you got him the jersey? I still got him. That's crazy. Do you sell the ring? Recently, you got Cash a jersey.
But that was my own money. But yeah, with your own money. And then he thought it was too expensive. So yeah. Okay. All right. Okay. Okay. Kate randomly surprised me. It wasn't for my birthday or anything, right? It was random. Yeah. Kate randomly came home and surprised me. Well, he had left for a week and I was like, I'm going to surprise him. And we were dating. Yeah. We're dating. We're dating.
I left somewhere for a week to come back. Kate randomly surprised me with a hockey jersey. And I've seen this hockey jersey at the store, and I was like, I've always told Kate, like, man, I want that jersey, but it's way too expensive. How much was the jersey? It was like $200. It was like $200. Yes, $200. And I always told her how much I wanted, but I was like, I could never spend $200 on a shirt. We didn't have a shared bank account at the time. We were still dating. We were dating. And then I come back, and she gets me the jersey, and I was like...
Oh. You spent $200 on this jersey. And I was like, thank you so much. He was not happy. But... He was like, aw, thanks. And then I asked if we could return it. Yeah, we returned it. And we returned it. Why? Because I didn't... I know. I know it's bad. Pretty messed up. Someone got you a nice gift and you just...
Because I didn't, I just like, I was like $200 is way too much for a shirt. On the contrary, I wish my girlfriends were like that. Yeah, Mariko's always like throwing hundreds at us. I bought like half my girlfriend's car. Yeah, me and Kate went back and we returned the jersey because that's like $200. I was like, I'm not going to get $200 worth.
From this shirt. From wearing it, yeah. I was like, I'd rather go spend $200 and go get eight shirts. Yeah. I'd rather go do that. Yeah. But that was also before I was really like, I don't know. Yeah. And then because of that, I noticed something. I was like, hmm, Kate does not have a concept of money. So I was like, I got an idea. I was like, I'm not going to pay for her anymore.
Oh, which is something you should catch on to. Yes. Yes. Never pay for women. Yeah. Don't pay for women. Big scam. No, but I always paid for everything for Kate when we were, because when we were dating, like I'd always pay for the days and everything, blah, blah, blah. And then I got to a point where we would go, we'd be going through a drive-thru and I would say, we need two orders.
And I make her pay for hers and me for mine. That's kind of crazy. And sometimes I would make her pay for mine. Oh. Oh, that's even more crazy. I mean, that makes sense. Because I wanted her to know about money because she never had a job. But it sounds like you just took advantage of her. You're like, and then I made her pay for mine. No, I make her pay for mine sometimes or instead of splitting it, I pay for her and both of us and she pays for both of us. Wait, but how over y'all? Because.
She was like 15, 16. Okay, that makes sense. And she was like you. She was getting money from the internet. And I was like, I don't feel like she has a concept of money. And she hasn't had an actual job. But you didn't have a concept of money because you were like spending $800 at the mall every day. Yeah. When he was younger. Yeah, when I was your age. That's why I was like, Kate can't be doing that. Because I went through that phase where I blew all my money.
and so then i was so much money i know i would go to the mall drop like eight hundred dollars you guys seen those like machines where there's like a bunch of money flying around you try to grab it that was cash's wallet but it's just coming out wait do you regret it a lot oh yeah yeah definitely that's why i didn't want her to go be blowing money because she's making more money and she's never had a job and she didn't understand what money was yet so i was like she's got to understand what money is
I agree. And it did teach me. I was like, dang, this like, yeah, I spend this money. He dripped up the stairs again. Yes, he did. We saw it. No way, bro. Alex is always tripping up the stairs. At least once a day. It never fails. Okay. But to bring it back full circle, you don't need to spend that much money. No, that's insane. Especially on someone who's not your boyfriend. Also. That's crazy. Yeah, no, I.
I know from personal experience. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Maverick got scammed harder than anybody else did. Yeah, I have a thing. Beautiful women want something and I'm just like, sure, I'll buy it. I'm the complete opposite. I'm like, nope, not if it's money. That's mine. You gotta find something else. Wait, but actually...
Cash, you make yourself sound so, like genuinely, you sound like so rude on the podcast. People, literally people are like, does Cash really act like that? No. No, I'm misunderstood. I'm misunderstood. I first saw Famous Birthdays. Cash, Cash don't talk like that off the podcast. I'm misunderstood. What do I talk like
I got the podcast? Like a normal person. I think he talks worse, actually. No, because my question is on the podcast. Yeah, at any rate, I feel like I'm censored on here. But I love the flattering words. No, when I was, the other day, I was taking, I set my phone up and I was taking a video. I was taking my makeup off and Cash just starts talking about how if I got shot, I would be more protective because I have breasts and he doesn't. And I was just like- You think a breast don't stop a bullet? Oh, 100%. No. No, no, no. I mean-
I was just talking in our room and then I get on TikTok later and she posted the conversation. And I was like, you were filming this? And I was scrolling TikTok and all I hear is, do you think your boobies would stop a bullet? I was like, why would you post that? But the thing is, I saw a TikTok where a breast implant was crushed by a car, but it didn't get crushed. Let me tell you something. Wow. If I'm going to shoot you in the chest, Mav.
Would you rather throw a boob on top of that or are you chilling right now? I'll take the boob. Yeah, you take the paddock. Someone in the comment section was talking about how someone they knew had gotten shot, but because she had a boob, it was like millimeters away from her heart. And it would have killed her if she didn't have it. Imagine... Okay, hear me out. You know how girls get...
What if we got like breast implants? No. What if we got like bulletproof vest implants? That'd be very heavy. Like abs. Yeah. Like bulletproof abs. Like bro. Just metal abs.
Should we do it? It's hard to break the skin. That would hurt. It would still hurt, but you'll be okay. That is true. But you'd be very front heavy. Or, hear me out, you could just get a bulletproof vest and just put it on when you need it. You gotta wear that all the time. And then people see it. This way, you can pretend like you're dying. Like, oh no, I'm shot. Ha ha! Gotcha! Yeah, and then after you're dead, and then grab a gun and then shoot them. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. We're gonna start off with some dating advice here. So, we all posted on our stories for dating advice. Oh.
So who wants to start? I'll start. What's that? What's that? This one makes me laugh. How do I know if he likes me or wants me dead? What the? Well, how is that a question?
Okay, actually, the actual question. Did you just make that up? No, somebody actually said that. Oh. Okay. Wait, hold on. I'm sorry for whoever that is. I really do hope you figure that out. But I'd run. Yeah, but I'm going to go with He Wants You Dead if that's a question. Okay, first question is... When in doubt, walk it out.
Ooh. Okay, that's... He used it to walk it out. All right, sorry. Okay, first question. Should girls make the first move? No. Yes. I got a theory. I have a theory. I have a theory. Okay, go. I'm next. Okay, listen. So I think girls should make like the first like 2% move. Yes. Just to give the guy like the...
and then and then the guys should make the first move you mean like first move like the girls should make like the like the little like eye flicker or like the like the little stare the giggle something like that or like a little touchy to let the guys know the girls should do like a little type of thing like that and then the guys should be the one to make like the actual move yeah you agree yeah no if a girl comes up to you and she starts talking to you it's like
Oh, I guess this is easier because as a girl, I feel like every guy's interested in you. Can you just say, as a girl, it's easy? Yeah, as a girl, it's easier. No, no, y'all shut up. Every guy wants every girl, but not every girl wants every guy. But not every guy wants to keep every girl they get. But here's the thing. But we'll talk to them and it doesn't matter. A lot of guys like the idea of these girls. Yeah, but a lot of guys, the girls don't even like the idea of them.
Yeah. Listen, there's some girls I'll talk to. Well, I'm trying to think of a time I've been rejected. But you don't get it. This guy just said you don't get rejected. Well, Mr. Confident over there.
what about you don't get rejected what about what about the girl you dm'd and she never answered you and then you posted a video because i don't think she saw what about the way you saw your video technically i dm'd her did you tag her yeah technically this is your fault you guys this is actually a funny story what's the girl's name addie kate no don't okay bleep that out it doesn't matter it's on my instagram or my tiktok that's what i'm
All right. Matt was deeming this girl. He's like, what should I say? I'm like, let me see. Let me see. And I grab his phone. And as I grab his phone, I accidentally call him. What are you all doing? I accidentally called a girl on Instagram. You have really hairy armpits. Okay, Miss Miniature Ed Sharon. Oh!
That was a violation. Maybe Mr. Rat Face? Like, chill out. Old news, Harper. Old news. That was actually a straight violation. Okay, anyways, the story. Mav's deeming this girl. I grab his phone. I'm like, let me see. And as I grab the phone, I click call on Instagram. And Mav calls this girl on Instagram. And when you call someone, it's in the log. It stays in the log. You can't delete it. There's no deleting it. It just says missed call. Mav was like, you messed everything up. You messed everything up. And then...
We kind of thought a way to make up for it. So we just texted back, I guess you're busy. Oh. Because we thought that might be a little funny. But she still hasn't answered. I guess you're busy. And then we were like, you know what? We'll make a TikTok about this because it's hilarious. And she still didn't answer. And she still didn't answer. Oh.
But one day I'll run into her. Okay. And when I do. One day in like a week. I'll figure out if she's actually someone I'd be interested in. Harper. I don't even know her. What kind of questions did you get? Let's see here. So I screenshotted some and circled them. Let me see here. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Okay. Wait, pull your mic a little off your face. Like that? No, like down. Oh, down. Okay. There you go.
Okay, so basically, number one, what do I do if my friend told me her dad died but I know she's lying? Her mom told me. Oh. So. What? What do you mean so? Harper acts like she has an answer already. Okay. Harper acts like I've been through this before. Listen. My friend.
My friend did the same thing. This happens a lot. Listen, this happens a lot. And I feel bad for you. But if she's lying, she's a liar. Get her out of your house. Yeah, no, that's so true. If someone's lying about their dad dying, they need psychological help. Just don't be friends with them. Yeah, like my dad died. That's like weird to lie about. Do you guys have any real dating advice that you guys give? Oh, here's some.
Oh, that's not... I guess not. No, read it. Read it. I want you to read it. Yeah, read it. How to know if someone likes you for your personality or your body. Are we talking personality? You can just tell. Are we talking personality? I would go for looks. That's what I do. I don't know.
I'm not joking. I go for looks. I'm sorry. If a guy is really funny, I think he's funny. Hey, you're my friend. But if he's funny... Hey, Harper, I respect that. Because unfortunately for me, I had to go with personality. You're not funny. That was a joke. That was a joke. She'll be back.
She's standing right. She just dabbed. She just dabbed out of frame. Yo, like I. See, there's no winning that. Harper said looks. Everybody laughed at her. I said personality. Everybody was like, wow, that's me. So you can't answer that question. Nobody laughed at you. I'm kidding. Wait, that was rude. No, like, I mean, like, I mean, like, nobody laughed at that. No. No, I'm saying. Because Kate is pretty and I would marry her. Yep. Things are pretty. You mean it?
No, I'm saying you said you would go for looks and everybody's like, wow, that's so bad, Harper. And I said personality and everybody's like, wow, that's so bad. And that's just hilarious. But everybody gets silent. I think it's funny. It's a weird question. I guess it was kind of funny. Wait, what was the original question? Oh, yeah. Oh, you should go for looks or personality? How do you know if they like you for looks or your body? Or for looks or personality? I guess it's like whatever they talk to you about. Here's the thing. Yeah. I would say if somebody likes you for your body, then they're going to want to like... Say like...
Look at that scrumptious butt. They're going to want to do stuff with you. That's how you know. They're not going to say that. Pretty close, pretty close. Just ignore her. What did she say? Just ignore her. We'll tell you later. If they like you for your body, I would say that they're going to try to physically be with you.
like a salt no like kiss you no i mean like like i'm talking like the guys that like show up at 2 a.m they're like you up they show up at 2 a.m what are you trying to do whoa okay no everybody stop this conversation no i'm saying i'm giving my advice if they want if they want you for your body they're not going to want to spend time with you without actually doing intimate stuff like what like kissing oh my lord stuff like that we're keeping it pg here yeah like kissing anything else um
But no, but if they like your personality, like they genuinely enjoy spending time with you. And they'll ask. Yeah, and they'll like... I don't know if all y'all know this, but Cash and Kate did not kiss for pretty much their whole engagement. That drove me crazy. We kissed? What? It drove you crazy. It made me so mad. It was weird, man. It was...
When they finally kissed. It felt like she was, because she came over every day and filmed with us. It felt like she was our sister. And then all of a sudden, at their engagement, when they proposed. Oh, they didn't kiss? They kissed at the proposal. No, we kissed at the proposal. Oh, that's good. Oh, that was so crazy. Yeah. And then Karen was like, I just did that in front of my dad. Oh my gosh. Yeah. My sister just kissed my brother. God.
It was not okay. It was so weird. Because we were filming a music video when we got engaged. So after Cash proposed, we were like, okay, we got to get a couple of shots for the video. So Cash and I had a quick little makeout scene. But we just got engaged. Not a makeout scene. It was a makeout. Have you seen the clip, babe? We're like sucking faces. Every time I watch it, I'm like, why did we do that? I think,
Kissing is gross. It was very like, it was like, literally when I first saw the video, I was like, my dad watched this. My dad was there. Her dad was there in person. Dad, I'm so sorry. Actually, I would hate that if my dad like saw me kissing somebody or my mom. Well, I was getting married six months later, so they have bigger things to worry about. It was my favorite scene.
Keep that on the DL. Here's the thing is that Mav just said, well, they didn't kiss. We didn't, but now we just sound like we just didn't like each other or something. And we also sound like liars because the other podcast we were telling about our first kiss when we were dating. Okay, yeah. Now we have to explain it. Go ahead. We were kissing. Okay. When
When Cash and I first met, we kissed. We were like, when we were like 13, we started kissing each other. And what did we call you? Kissing Kate. That was my name. My name in Cash's family was Kissing Kate. Yeah, my dad was like, where's Kissing Kate?
So then Cash and I, a few years later, we start dating. And for probably about the first three months of our relationship, we kissed. And about three months in, we were like, you know what? Just as a boundary for us, we knew that we wanted to wait till marriage before we did anything. Not that we thought kissing was bad. It was just that kissing always leads to other things. So that's why we decided we're just not going to kiss. What? What?
Sorry. What did he say? Nothing. Continue. So we just decided that if we stop kissing, then we're not going to be doing other things that we don't want to be doing. So we just stopped kissing. And then we kissed when we filmed our music video and we got engaged. And then we didn't kiss again until we were married. Yeah. And then we kissed on our wedding day and we haven't kissed since. Nope. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I just think we kissed now. But no, now it sounds confusing because...
- Bro just, he just whipped up the music video. - Oh, there it is. - It's so bad, can we get it in slow motion? - I don't even wanna look. - Can we make the playback speed slower? - That's kinda scary. - Try not to swallow each other.
We can. Let's go slow motion. You can do that? Yeah, slow motion. Here we go. Can y'all tell that we're doing it? Oh, nice. Ew. That's... I mean, get it, I guess. It's still going. Oh! Oh!
And then it goes to dancing on the car. Can you guys tell that we hadn't kissed each other in about eight or nine months? Yes. I was looking for my gum. That's all I was doing. No, yeah. So that's why. We're not. I think that that sounds confusing, though, and that people. But anyways. Have you had your first kiss? Yes. Oh, I thought she was not going to answer it. Okay, okay. Was it with Harrison? Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Y'all, don't tell my mom. Don't tell my mom. Your mom just literally stepped out. Wait, Harper, I was actually, I was actually, I meant to ask you, I went to ask you before, like, if there was anything that you didn't want to know. Wait, why are you saying this on the pod if you don't want your mom to know? Well, she's not going to watch the whole thing. I mean, let's hope
not. If your mom sees this, maybe Cash and I just talking about our first kiss experience will make it better. Her mom's going to be like watching the TikTok and she's going to be getting close to like halfway in or wherever the thing is. Harper's going to like pull the wifi around. Nope. Um,
I'm not. Yeah. I know. No, but like, it was awkward. Like, it was like a weird. It was, okay. It was the day before my birthday. I was like, oh, this is perfect. Blah, blah, blah. I remember that day. Oh, we. Whoa. We filmed that day. Yeah. Yeah, I remember.
I remember when my avionics were sweatpants and my red shirt, I was like, yeah, I look so good today, blah, blah, blah. And not actually, but like, I thought that I looked so good. And then I went to lunch or no dinner with my cousins and my sister and me. And then they showed up out of nowhere. I think they were like tracking my location. I was like, oh, what's going on? The guys? Because I remember I turned off my location when I went to your house and I turned it back on. And like Hardy and Harrison. Oh, yeah. And Hosh.
Are we using their real names now? No, no. It's all with an H. Anyways. I think that was their real name. No, no. I don't know.
I don't remember their names. I don't know their names. And then, yeah, so after that happened, it was kind of awkward. And then they went to my birthday party and it was just crazy. And then they never talked to me again. Oh my gosh, wait, after y'all kissed? Actually, Hardy, he still talks to me. And Hosh. Hardy's cool. He's curly hair, right? Yeah, I actually, I mean, I don't really know him that much, but. Is he the one that comes on the C-Doos?
Yeah, he was on the CD with us. Oh. He was the one that said LA Fitness playing basketball with us. Wait, was it all three of those is who we're talking about? Yeah, I think one of those was the one. Oh, I know exactly who we're talking about. I think I know who Harrison is. Oh, I know exactly who he is. Because I look at Harrison and I'm like, he's definitely popular. The short one. Harrison said it that day. Yeah, I think he did. I think he was like, yeah. Her face. Yes.
Oh my gosh, wait, Harper, he did tell us. He ratted on y'all so hard. Was he like, yeah? He came over. No, literally, this is what he did. Harper, this is what he did. He was like, yeah, bro, like I kissed Harper. And he like, okay. Okay.
And then I was like, not that we're making fun of you, it's funny. Is he the one that was freaking out on the seat-oo? Yes! He was the one freaking out. No, he told us and we were like, where was it? And he was like, Ben & Jerry's. Yeah, it was! Your first kiss was at Ben & Jerry's? It was in front of it, not like in it, but like, and then the worker was like, W Riz! What?
And he also goes for the cherry. You're like asking what flavor you got. You're like, let me just show you. I got some strawberry. You want to taste it? I would cry if someone said what flavor you got and then that was their response. Oh my, I would need to. I'll tell you my shady thing.
This is, I feel really bad about this. So as everybody and their mother knows, Cash and I liked each other for years and years and years. Except apparently it wasn't very mutual because Cash refused to date me. But, so yeah, actually. I was playing hard to get. We're going to talk about Cash. For three years. Which works. It does work. Did you come to the conclusion last night? Last night we came to the conclusion if a guy just ignores a girl.
He falls in love with her. Or she falls in love with him. If a guy just straight up ignores her, she likes him more. Yeah, that's... I never had more girls like me until I decided I'm not dating. Yeah. Yeah.
it's a blessing and a curse man and then all of a sudden everyone everyone likes me i'm like guys no no no that was very humble i'm not dating no wait say the story kate so when cash and i were in like middle school remember i had like my middle school boyfriend and then like cash and i cuddled all night one time and i was like yeah that was a messy story you can watch like the first or second episode where i talk about that anyways so after me and that boyfriend break up i'm like hey cash like what's
Good. And so we kind of talk for a little bit, right? Then two weeks away from getting my braces, I'm pumped. I'm like, Cash has never seen me without braces. Like, I'm so excited for this. A couple of days before he like ghost me no more, like literally did not talk to me. He left me on deliver forever. And for like six months, he did not talk to me. And so
That's just rude. I moved on. Not really. I thought about him like every second of every day and it was really embarrassing. Until finally one day we started texting again. I don't think he was thinking about you. Yeah, I know he wasn't. Anyways, so the shadiest thing I ever did though was once after that six month period of Cash just not talking to me and then we like started talking like
on and off. Like at least once a month, Cash would be like, oh, we got to stop talking. We can't do this. And I'm like, yeah. And then like we'd talk two days later. Yeah. Why are you sleeping? Sorry, I'm just trying to get my butt cheeks to rest. Oh, okay. Oh, wow. So anyways, anytime Cash would be all like, oh,
oh, like, we got to stop talking. I was like, okay, I'm heartbroken. I got to get over it. So I would, like, go add the... There was, like, probably, like, two or three guys that I would just kind of text to make myself feel better. And the second that cash started talking to me again, I cut them off like that. And so...
I felt really bad, though. That's a good idea. No, it wasn't. I feel bad because I think one of them, like, really liked me. And this one time I was really upset because Cash had called me. And he was like, hey, I'm going to be in Dallas tomorrow. You want to hang out? And I'm like, absolutely. You know I will literally any day, any time, anywhere. Oh, my gosh. I know where you're going with this. I'll say it because I'm way faster. Oh, okay.
She hung out with a guy. I don't know. She talks really fast. She hung out with a guy the night before she hung out with me and never told me. But I also hung out with a girl the night before I hung out with her and never told her. I think y'all told this story last time. No, we did this twice. Oh my gosh. Yeah, but this guy, I felt bad because I was super upset because I was waiting for Cash to text me. She did the worst thing a girl can do when a guy goes to hang out with a girl. You know what she did? What'd she do?
She talked about me the whole time. Oh, I did. I was one of those girls. And so I was like crying and I was like, he said he was going to come hang out with me today. And I'm just so sad. I would leave so fast. And he literally just like listened to me rant. And then to make it even worse, I'm like literally mid breakdown and Cash says, hey, I'm going to come pick you up. You ready? And I'm like, yeah. And all of a sudden I'm like better like that. And this guy, he's like texting me and he's like, oh my gosh, like, are you okay? I hope you're doing better or whatever. I ghosted him for the rest of the night because Cash is going to pick me up.
And for like the next six hours, this dude was just like, oh my gosh, Kate. Everyone looks so bored. He was like, no one was interested in your story. She's just been talking so long. Even the two people in the audience were so dazed. He was staring at the wall. I saw him staring at the wall. Oh, okay. It was a good story. Are you single? Oh, oh. Wait, what? What the heck? What? What?
What does that mean? Are you talking to somebody? I mean, like, I feel like it's like, yes, no. I'm not like looking for a relationship. A situation ship? Yeah. Yeah, same. Yeah, same. I feel like a situation ship. We're not together, but y'all are just like iffy. Maybe. Maybe we'll be together. Yeah. Yeah, low key, I just like play around.
You keep your options open. Harper doesn't do nothing. She's lying to you. I do. Okay, so number one, there's this one guy. We're going to call him George. I was talking about him yesterday. George. Does George know we talk about him on the podcast? Wait, is this the same as? No, but Harrison knows we talk about him on the podcast. Did Harrison get mad? Oh, no, he likes it. Harrison loves it. He loves it. He's like, oh, yeah, Harper talked about me on the podcast.
So, yeah. So, Harrison was my first kiss. Okay. Yeah. As you can see, I have raised... No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Okay. So, Harrison. And then now I'm talking to this guy named... I'm not going to say it. George. Yeah. And he's going to like... So, Harrison and George are going to be fighting for you. Yeah. No, no. I'm kidding. No, no. So, like... What's his name? George. How old are you? 14. You're 14? Yeah. Yeah. So, you said I was 13. Man, I did not have this many... I did not have this many guys when I was 14. No, I have two. But...
But there could be a third and a fourth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There could be a fifth, you know. Wait, Harper, does your mom know you kissed Harrison? Yes, yes. After the podcast, she grounded me, but... I didn't know. Say she didn't ground you. No, I didn't know.
my first kiss when I was 14. Yeah. Okay. I was 13. How old was I? 15. 15. 16. 16. Yeah. Wow. Wow. Mine was at a dance competition. Oh my gosh. It was. Oh my gosh. Was it on Dance Moms? No. Was it like backstage? What do you mean on dance? When was it? At a dance competition. Yeah. It was at Nationals. Was it like part of the dance? No. Oh.
But Maddie's was. Remember that episode? Oh, yeah. When she kissed that one guy and she wiped off her mouth and ran away. Yeah, I remember. But no, I think we were at Nationals. So Nationals is like a week long, right? Yeah. So we were in Vegas and he was like, do you want to go get ice cream? And I was like, sure. How old were you? Oh, no way. 13, 14. My first kiss was in front of an ice cream shop. Oh, me too. Really? Oh, my gosh. That's crazy. It might have been Froyo, actually. You want to go get ice cream after this? Oh, yeah.
Still trying to get that first kiss. Still trying to get the first kiss. So yeah, keep telling, keep telling. That's all I got. In front of an ice cream shop. In front of an ice cream shop. Really? That's crazy. How romantic. Yeah. Yeah. I guess. Mine was like a dare and it was like, just like that. I think mine was like that too, but it wasn't a dare, but it was like that. I think everyone's, not yours, but everyone else's was like. Everyone else's was like. What do you mean not his? Oh.
We've told this one before. No, we never have told yours, actually. We told mine. My first kiss was with you. We told that, didn't we? Yeah, except it wasn't a first kiss. It was like a three-hour make-out session. That's a lot. Yeah, that was my first kiss. I'm like, what a learning experience, low-key. Oh, I had already had my first kiss. I knew what I was doing. I was 14. I was teaching him. You were like,
You were like, I know exactly what I do. You were 15? Yeah. That's crazy. And you were 13? 12? No, I would have been 13 or 14. 12? She was not 12. Just so y'all know, the adults in the house did not condone that. We definitely went behind their backs. You have to sneak around to do that kind of stuff. For sure. Isn't it crazy that they've known each other for 20 years?
How old do you think I am? Do you actually think we're all 30? No, I know that she's 30. She's over here thinking everybody's 35. I swear. No, but like for like 10 years, right? It's probably. I guess so. Yeah, about 10 years. That's crazy. Yeah. Yeah, that's so crazy. I mean, it couldn't be me. Yola!
Harper here and I'm with Maverick and a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader and they are on a blind date if you can't tell they have two blind dates on you forgot her name okay maybe alright so what's your name again it's Claire yeah so yes we're with Claire and Mav so they're going on a blind date as you can tell and I'm gonna ask them questions yeah okay so ask a question wait I'm so lost oh wait did you know I'm a cheerleader
No, that's awesome. Yeah, I've been doing cheer for five years. Harper, you're not on the team. Are you dating her? No. No. Okay, fine, fine, fine. Wait, wait, wait. Are they supposed to get to know each other and then take the blindfolds off? Yeah. Okay. Did you say you're on the Cowboys? Yeah.
all right what's with the blindfold that's kind of that's kind of did you know um it sucks to lose the playoffs every year doesn't it okay number one number one oh no hey she didn't hey i love the cowboys and this is why you feel the pain no girls yeah she didn't like that i would say maybe i should just leave yeah no okay so number one um
Did he know Maverick was a cheerleader? I did not. Yeah. I did for... I did competitive for just like... And he did it for one of his girlfriends. Oh, wow. Whoa. That's now his ex. No. No way. Kill Harper. Okay. And also... I did that to meet girls. And also Maverick one-manned me in the grass. So...
Yeah. So he's good. So he had one man, you. Oh, okay. So basically. I'm a little scared to do that. No, no, no. You don't need to be scared. So Maverick is a flyer. What? Yeah.
Uh-huh. I said, y'all? He does heel stretches and extensions and stuff. It's crazy. Oh, yeah, for sure. He's good. And I just have to say, y'all are perfect for each other. And Maverick has been desperate for the past nine, seven months. Perfect for each other. Name five things about Claire. She's a cheerleader. She is your... She's a mage. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yes.
I'm trying to think. That's a good start, Harper. That's a good start. You know, I've only known her. I like the bars on the floor. I know, right? No, you should just zip. It's fine. I think you should zip. Okay, fine. You ask questions. You ask questions. Since I'm this bad. I like Harper asking questions. She's entertaining. Yeah. This is great. All right, man, you ask a question. Oh, my gosh. How old are you? I'm 24. Oh, my gosh.
Okay. How old are you? 22. Oh, 22. He's younger. I am. That's not a problem. Oh, that is. I think that might be a problem. I'm old for my age. Don't worry. No, that's mature for you.
He's definitely not mature for his age. What? No, meet him. No, we were trying to do pirouettes yesterday. Yeah, I did. Amazing. Wait, you did what yesterday? Pirouettes. Yo, I got four in a row, though. What is that? You got two in a row. It's a turn. No, I got four out of my video. Okay, fine. Four? Yeah. That's kind of a lot. I was pretty impressed, too. Who taught you that? A ballerina. A ballerina.
What ballerina? Are you cheating on her? What? Hey, yo. It's a blind date. It's okay. They're not together. Yeah, they will be. This is like to see if there would be a second date. So are you guys even going to take the blindfolds off or are you just going to get to know each other? I don't know. Oh, yeah. They haven't seen each other yet. I don't know. You tell me.
Harper, what do you want them to do? You're the one leading them. So, I, I, um, yeah. So, what I want them to do is I want, um, huh. Okay. I'm trying to think. I want them to hold hands. Okay. Wait, hold on. I have to show you. What? I know. What are we, in fifth grade, Harper? Oh, wow. Okay. Wow. Yo!
feel symmetry. Is there chemistry, Harper? Yeah, chemistry. Okay, so... It's even. So, it's even. That's funny. And I
It's even. Okay. And also chemistry. Okay. I can feel the two hands made my heart race. Oh, okay. Made your heart race. Yeah, so. It makes sense, honestly. Yeah, like, boom. And then when they're like, uh. So, I think y'all should take off the blindfolds. Okay. Okay. Three, two, one.
I kind of pictured you as a blonde. I think just the cheerleader thing, I thought blonde for sure. With you blue eyes. Uh-oh, it's stuck up my ear. Oh, yeah, you do. Oh, no. Wait, can you help me? It's stuck in your earring. I know, yeah, it is. Let me get it out. I can't see it. Oh, gosh, you're... I do have blue eyes, though. Yeah.
Oh, there you go. Wait, you do? Yeah. Is your hair colored or is that natural? It's pretty natural. I have a little bit blonder hair naturally, but. Yeah, my hair's just naturally red. I can tell. So what are your thoughts, Claire? On the blind date? On Mav. Whoa. Not while I'm here. Kind of cool hair, I mean. Oh, let's go. Would you say cheerleading's like a sport? Stop, Maverick. You're going to offend her.
Yeah, cheerleading is a sport. It's okay. Whoa. Yo, no, cheerleading is a sport. It's a touching subject. I know it is. I've seen this fight happen so many times. Well, I do think, okay, so technically I'm a dancer. I know, you're like a Marquette, or not a Marquette, but like a, a, I'm trying to think, like a, a dancer, but like, you know, like at high school is how there's like, like how there's cheerleaders and dancers, like you're more of a dancer. I'm the dancer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I don't do,
flips or anything like that. Do you do stunts? No. Really? We're like full-on dancers. But they call us cheerleaders because we hold pop-up pop-ups. Oh, yeah. We cheer on the football team, but we dance. Well. It's a little different. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do think you have to be athletic. Okay, what about your love life? Oh, yeah. My love life? Yeah. It's been going good. Well, I take that back. I don't know if it's going good or not. The last week. How do I say this without the person knowing?
Just say it. Good one, Harper. That's always Harper's trap. If you're the person watching this, listen. We love you. And it can be Yogi. We do. Yogi. It's my fault. I'm bad at communication. All right? So, I think I accidentally went on a date. You accidentally went on a date? Yeah, I didn't mean to. But...
This girl kind of opened up to me one night, and then I was like, okay, yeah, you should come to church with me on Sunday, and we can talk some more after. And she was like, okay. So she was like, let's get lunch. I was like, okay, cool, we'll get lunch. And then we just meet her at lunch.
And it kind of felt like a date. Yeah, I'll tell the stories the slowest way possible. Okay. It kind of felt like a date. Is that what you want me to talk? Yeah, talk about Harbor. Straight to the point, man. It felt like a date. I wasn't sure if it was a date or not. And then...
It comes time to split the check. And this is the point where you're going to know if it's a date or not. Wait, who was this? Don't worry about it. It was Yogi. We get to this point where it comes time to split the check. And like, I don't mind paying for my friend's food. I do it all the time. I love taking my friends out to eat. So I genuinely wouldn't have cared to pay for her food. But I didn't want her to think it was a date. So the lady comes up and the girl says, can I get a box? And the lady says, yes, please.
How many? And then the other, and then she said, can I get the check also? And she said, yes. How many? Me? I said, I spoke up. I was like, this is my shot to make sure it's not a date.
I said, two. Oh. Oh, gosh. Two. Oh. The lady goes, two boxes. Got it. And walks off. I was like, oh, no. Frick. Okay. Well. Oh. So what happened? So then I paid for the food. How much? You paid for the food? I did. Bro, be a man. Put your foot down. It was like, God.
Cash had to do that to me one time. I didn't know what to do. All I know is if I'm paying for the food, she ain't taking home the box. Yeah.
I'm definitely taking the box home. Have I paid for it? Listen, you ate what you ate, but the rest is mine. You know what I'm saying? Also, what type of girl wants to walk out of a date with just a bunch of chicken wings? I'm going to eat these later. I'm going to eat these later. Here's the thing. I actually enjoy hanging out with her, but we're just good friends. There's nothing romantically there. I had to put Kate on a budget once.
He did. He cut me off. We were dating or engaged or I don't know. I think we were dating. I don't know, but we knew we were going to get married. So we knew our money was going to be shared, so we didn't really care. And we were just using the money, whatever, right? And then she started using money. Oh, she started using money? She started using money. Oh, no. Swiping it a little too often, you know what I mean? Yeah. She started swiping like Swiper. Oh, I know what you mean. Swiper, no swipey. And I was like, this guy chill. This guy...
Chili, chill, chill. You know what I'm saying? Nope. You know what I'm saying? I don't. Oh. A quick backstory. Mav one time commented on his girlfriend's post. Baby. Oh my gosh. Let me just say it. He said, baby, chili, chill, chill. Inside joke. That's what his comment. It was not an inside joke. It was making fun of you. It was not. Dude, he comes up with a new strategy every time to deflect from this. That's what he said in that statement. That's not true. Anyways. Anyways.
I'm swiping the card too much. Oh, yeah. She was swiping the card and I was like, oh. Cha-ching. Cha-ching. I was like, oh my gosh. I thought it was my Shopify going off, but it wasn't. Oh. And I check it and I was like, oh, dear Lord. I started praying right then and there. Welcome to married life. I was like, maybe the card will decline, maybe? And it didn't. It kept accepting. Oh, no. And, bro, she used so much money. Can we get a number? Mm-hmm.
Do you have a number? I don't. It was a lot. It was a lot of money. And I was like, okay. Plot twist, it was like 80 bucks. I was like, all right, Kate, we're going to have to...
budget here. And I was like, actually, instead of budget, I got a great idea. How about you use your own money? Because we still had our separate accounts. I had like my high school checking still open. Yeah, and we knew we were going to get married. We knew our money was going to be shared, whatever. Oh, y'all were still dating. Yes, but I was like, Kate, you got to learn, because she was like 15 years old. I was like, Kate, you got to learn how to spend money. And she was like,
Yeah, I probably should learn that because I don't really value money or whatever. She's like, I know how to spend it really well. I'm really good at it. Listen. Then I cut a point in our dating relationship. I didn't pay for anything ever again. Whoa. She paid for everything. Yeah. Not only for mine. That's a hot take. We'd split everything because I wanted her to learn the value of money. It was her bank account with her money that she earned to get it. And then when we got married, it was no problem. So you taught her a lesson? I taught her a lesson. Wow. Wow.
I was really humbled one time we went into Hollister. I thought we were just shopping with that credit card. I was unaware that my credit card was going to be used that day. Apparently I asked her, do you want to go shopping at the mall? Yes. And she took that as me offering, do you want me to buy you things at the mall? That sounds like, that literally like, oh, you want to go shopping? Yeah, obviously. So I go into Hollister and I pick out a top and I'm at the checkout and I'm waiting for him to pull his card out and I realize that he's not and I was like,
Oh.
He's not pulling his credit card out to buy this for me. That's so funny. That sounds so bad, but listen. And then you know what she said? She told me this like two weeks ago. We were talking about this story. She said, if I would have known that you weren't buying it, I wouldn't have got the top because I didn't like it that much. No, I did like it. I did like it, but I'm not even joking, guys. She only liked it if you were buying it. No, I did like it, but not a whole lot. But I still liked it, but I bought it. And as we were walking out of the mall, I went back in the store and I returned it. Oh, okay.
So you just returned it because I didn't buy it for you? Yep. Oh. But I loved when you bought me stuff. It was so special. I was like, oh, and Cash bought this for me. Yeah. I love when people buy me things. No one's buying me nothing. There's this girl that was our waitress. And then what happened? No, she was waiting on us. And I was like, this girl's personality is kind of like, she was just kind of funny and like cute. And I was like, all right. And so I just say one little thing at the table. I say, that girl's kind of cute.
Kate! I said, oh yeah, she is. Kate was like, this is my chance! This is my chance! I'm gonna take it! I have to do something!
What? What is it? I have to play Cupid. So she takes her phone. I pulled out my bow and arrows. Bro. She takes her phone, and she does one of those things where she writes on it. She's like, I got you. Okay, yeah, she pulled up. So we're just sitting there, having a meal, enjoying ourselves, and we kind of forget that I even said that this girl was cute. And all of a sudden, Kate gets this awkward laugh, twitching, nervous thing. I don't know what she was doing. What? She was like, tink.
We're like, what? And we look over at Kate and she's holding up a sign. She's got a sign up above her head. Cash, can you demonstrate? I'll demonstrate. Why did you screenshot it? You had the sign right there. This is what Kate did.
From across the restaurant. And she's showing the waitress from across the restaurant. If y'all can't read that, it says, my friend thinks you're cute. No way. That's a good move. She's laughing and nervous about it. You can tell she's nervous that she's doing this. She's like, is this funny? I don't know what's going on, but I'm doing it. I'm going to do it. I'm out here. I'm funny. And then the waitress sees from like... No, I was nervous because I didn't want you to... Yeah, we can all tell you were nervous. I didn't want to drop the ball. You did drop it. The second you
the sign you dropped the ball she never had the ball no one gave you the ball pick up the
And the ball is just not going in her hand anymore. So when you're bowling and you pick up too heavy of a ball, it's like... The girl starts laughing because it's like a glass thing. She starts laughing with some of the other waitresses and cooks back there. Yeah, you can see in the kitchen. So then she comes out. And this is kind of where Cash comes in. Then she comes down and I'm like, oh, shoot. She thinks I'm the one that thinks she's cute. Because he's sitting next to Kate. I'm sitting right next to Kate and Kate holds the sign like this. And then she looks at me and I was like... And then I was like, oh, shoot. Oh.
That's terrible. And then she comes out, and I took my ring off that day because... What? Well, we were at the gym or something, and I took it off and forgot to put it back on. And I was like, she thinks it's me. I got to tell her I'm married. So when she comes back to our table, I was like, oh, not me, by the way. I'm married. And then as soon as I said that, I was like, I'm married. Oh, shit.
shoot. And I was like, I promise I'm married. And my ring was on. She's like, Oh yeah, sure. Okay. And I was like, no, I am married. I promise it's to her. Oh my gosh. And yeah, yeah, that was bad. And then, and then I had to get into my interrogation because I needed to learn a little bit about the girl before.
Oh, it was so bad. Kate's looking out at the table like this, not even making a noise. So nervous, like shaking. Listen, not shaking. I was just like. You were making weird sounds. Yeah. I don't know what you were making. Kate's looking out at the table like this, and now she starts asking the waitress questions. She's like. She's just trying to hand us her drinks and stuff. And then she asks this. She doesn't ask like a normal human, how old are you? She goes, are you of age? Oh.
And doesn't even make eye contact with the girl. She's staring. Kate's staring straight down at the table. She's, are you of age? Like, hey. But it's like, it's more like this. Are you of age? Anybody have a chick? Are you of age? Why do I have to make eye contact with her? I'm not the one trying to get to know her. The girl answers. First off, the girl answers. You want to see how to do it? Oh, what's that? Like, how old are you? Not, are you of age? Listen, I'm not here to make friends. I'm here to find Maverick a wife. Are you of age? So she follows it up with, the girl's like, yes.
Yeah, yeah. No. No, no, she says no. Oh, yeah. First she says, no, I'm not. And we're like, what? You look like you're of age. So much worse. And then she's like, yeah, I'm 20. No, yeah. And we're like, okay, so you're of age. And she was like, oh, I thought you meant 21. We were like, no, 18. And then Kate's sitting there and she's like, are you single? No way. I said, do you happen to be single?
And then she goes, no, you did the same thing. You didn't even look at her. She's behind you. And you're just like, yeah, are you single? Yeah. But I didn't sound like some, and she goes, no, I have a boyfriend. And then later we come to find out the boyfriend is also a waiter at the restaurant at this very current moment. Yeah. So he's there too. And then it just, it all goes extremely, extremely downhill from there. And she was like, was there,
Her boyfriend was there. She was like, yeah, I have a boyfriend. And he saw the sign. When I held the sign up, she pulled her boyfriend to the glass so he could see through and see it. No way. But I thought he was just the, I just thought he was a friend. A chef. Yeah. So then she comes, we're talking to her for just a second. And she's like, yeah, I got a boyfriend. He's here. And we're like, he's here? And she's like, yeah, he's right there. And he was like hiding behind the corner, like almost like spying. What? And Cash is like.
It's okay. Come here. Give me a bed. Come here, bud. It's okay. Give me a bed. And then he finally comes out. And they, I guess, knew who we were. So it was like. Yeah, then it was even more awkward. Yeah. And they were like, do you guys have a podcast? I was like, no. No? No? Wait, so this was recent. Yeah. Oh, this was like last week. Yeah. Yeah. What? Yeah, so moral of the story, Maverick did not bag a wife that night. No, moral of the story is Kate is a horrible wingman. And I'm not. I'm a great wingman. I will not be taking that.
I am just going to keep searching until I find you love. Please don't search from where they're. It's embarrassing. It's not fun. Don't search. Every time we go out, I'm just going to start scouting. Yeah. From each of the ladies. I want one. What is one thing? Stop touching your mic. That a guy does that you're like, ooh, that's good. Good? I thought you were going to say bad. There's a lot. Do I wear neon hoodies? No. So. I.
For me, something… A good thing a guy can do is… Wait. Wait, I thought it was that. Does anybody hear that noise? No. Stop! Do not do that. I actually wasn't doing that. I genuinely heard a noise but it's gone now. It's like… Like that? Continue, Kate. Anyways, continue. Sorry. Sorry. I would say a good thing he can do is… Make money. That's good. That's a great thing. I'll work on that. I'll work on that.
I didn't have to go to college because I got married and I got a husband who makes money so that I don't have to go to college. Wow. Nice. All right. I was looking for an out of college. Hopefully we got better than make money. I don't know. It's like one of those things like how much money does your man have to make?
Have you seen those? No. How much money do you make? I don't know. Like, like… Okay, so what was the question? What's a good thing guys can do? Like a yes. Yeah. Opposite of an egg. Them being rich. Yeah. Again? Rich. And they buy me stuff. Two in a row? Two in a row?
like if you're watching this and you're like oh like i live like i live on the road like like but if you're in like a mansion and well if you're oh this is gonna get me canceled once again no but like guys she's only 14 i'm only 14 please please doesn't know any better i don't know yeah i'm just a 14 year old girl but go ahead what were you saying
If they live in a mansion, yes. If they live on the road, no. If they're nice and they live on the road, then maybe. But then if they're in a mansion and they're rude, then yes. And if they're in a mansion and they're nice, yes. So if they're in a mansion, that's an automatic yes. It doesn't matter if they're mean or nice. Yeah. That's good. I like that. And they look good. Obviously. Oh, yeah. So mansion or looks? So we got money and mansion. Yeah. Money. Really? Mansion. Okay. Harper or...
Harley, please give me a... The fact that her name is on a hard part, Harley, too. I know, so hard. Both have red hair. Both each is. I don't know. That's crazy. Because I will say, whenever we're talking, because we do a lot of work with y'all, whenever we're talking about one of y'all separately, we always have to clarify. Wait, there's only one letter difference. Yeah, it's just Harley or... Nope, nope. So I think you're wrong. There's definitely more than one letter. No, there's two. H-A-R... Where's the R? There's no Y in her name.
There's two different. The L and the Y. I don't really know. I'm not good at spelling. Me neither. But no, we always are like... Spelling Bs, bro. It's like, he'll be like, oh yeah, Harley, I mean, Harper. Yeah, it's like we mix it up all the time. Anyways, yes, not an opposite of an ick. Yeah, they have to be attractive, like Harper said. But, you know, I'm... Oh. The money, you know? They have to. It's like, if you like...
It's like a triangle. Make me pay for everything? Dude, you suck. This is one episode I should have got the gold shovel and they could have all held it and take a picture. It's like the triangle. That would be so cute. You know those episodes where it's like cute? That'd be so cute. We all have like a gold shovel. So y'all are just gold diggers together? Oh yeah. You know those YouTube videos? We're in it for love. Yeah. You know those YouTube videos that are like clearly fake and it's like, wait, is that your Lamborghini? And then the guy gets out the gold shovel.
No. No? No. You guys would all three get gold shovels. That would be so cute. It's like a triangle. So, looks, money, mansion. That's the same thing. No. Looks, money, mansion. Yeah. Looks, money, mansion. All right, Matt. Matt, what's eight? Well, I'll be forever alone. Yeah. You're left with all three, unfortunately.
What is this called? Opposite of an ick? Turn on? What is it? Money. I'll be real. If it's a girl that's not...
Like if she's like takes dating really serious and she hasn't had like many boyfriends, then that's like nice. Oh, shut up. Because there's no baggage. Wait, hasn't had any boyfriends? Yeah, she's had like none. What does that mean? That's the guy that's been in three serious relationships. No, no. I agree. I mean, I agree. Yeah, like I don't want to have to deal with like ex-boyfriends. Yeah.
Yeah. If a girl's like, I've had 12 boyfriends. It's like, whoa. That's quite a few. Sorry, it's my ex. But if she's like, oh yeah, I'm 20 and I take dating really serious. I've never had a boyfriend. I'm like, oh. I've had like one and I'm 24. It's like… Dating for marriage. Yeah. Then it's like, oh. This is nice. You're a little jealous of them. Matt, you're too grown to not be dating for marriage. Yes. That's the one that's been through three long-term girlfriends. Yeah. What? You can learn. Okay.
I have to say it was a green flag, okay? I have a green flag. You're a red flag. You're actually red. Why is Maverick a red flag? Give reasons why Maverick's a red flag. No, no, no. We're not doing this again. No, I think this is a good idea. Okay, so one reason is he...
Watch it. No. Watch it. You don't have to hold back. Okay, he gets no girls. Number two. Okay, well, start off strong. Number two. I'll let you know, I was at dinner last night with three girls. Number two, he dances. Dancing? Ladies?
Ladies love my dancing. Ladies love when I dance. Matt, you gotta start realizing, say you only hang out with all girls, it's not a flex. You know what that means you are? What? That means you're the best friend. No, that is not at all. You're just considered one of the girls. You're considered one of the girls. I will say, I was born as a part of the dinner. Maverick also was flexing that he was with three girls last night, but he started a fight with all the girls. I did. At her birthday. I don't know if we get into this. Red flag, red flag. Stop punching him. I know.
Another one. He touches his mic. He touches his mic all the time. The first part of the dinner, we're sitting at this- Don't say what you said. We were waiting on our table. So we're just sitting at the bar waiting for our table. And they were talking about stuff and I was getting kind of bored. And I was like, okay. And so then I was like, all right, ladies. How are you three going to make a million dollars this next year? What? I was like, let's talk about something I'm interested in. And they were like- Money. Yeah.
The conversation didn't really spark anything. We're going somewhere and I'm like, what's controversial? Y'all don't understand.
So then I said some controversial things. Oh. At the girl's birthday party. Let's end it there. At the girl's birthday dinner. I had all three of them pretty, I don't know if they were mad, but I don't think they were happy with me. Yeah, on someone's birthday. I did apologize to the girl that it was her birthday. I was like, hey, sorry. But she was like, I don't care. She's like, it's just a conversation. Oh, okay. If she took it well. Yeah. Wait, I want to do one. What? What's your? Hey, wait, what are we calling them?
Instead of an ick, let's call them a... Red flag. I was going to say turn-ons, but I don't like that. Green flag. Oh, green flags. There we go. Green flags. I was going to say lick, but I didn't think of that. Lick? Oh. Like an opposite of ick. Oh, like a like. Yeah. Like a like. We'll go with a green flag. Green flag. Not a lick. My lick about you. Let's see. My green flag for a girl is...
Be careful with what you say. Yeah. Because what you said earlier and Kate didn't hear. Guys, I have to go watch that back. Oh, let's see. Let's see. Oh, if they cook and clean. Oh. That's a green flag. Me and Alex were talking about how we're like single and we were thinking about hiring a chef because it's getting desperate around here. Oh. I don't feel like y'all liked my answer. I cook. I cook.
I don't cook. I don't clean. But let me tell you. Okay, never mind. I don't cook. I don't clean. Wait, what song is it? That's a dirty song. Yeah, Harper. I'm not singing it. Go ahead. I haven't even heard that. Wait, it's like… It's WAP. Yeah. What?
Don't sing that. Don't sing it, girls. Anyways, moving on. No, listen. I cook every morning. We go to the gym. I cook. I clean. And I do clean. Harper, stop. I cook breakfast and I clean up after I cook breakfast. What happened to Nicky? That was Nicky. No, Cardi B. Okay. Doja Cat.
Nicki Minaj had a song that was like what was her song let's not talk about no I'm just saying hers was like the opposite can we talk about anyone besides those two people the opposite of no the opposite of like not cooking not cleaning she was like I don't know it was something like that she was like listen
I like to think that I make a mean breakfast sandwich. So... Yeah. That's all I'm saying is I have marked off two of Cash's green flags. You make some mean toast. It's burnt every single morning. Bro, she has to know. Bro, every morning. I'm like doing some emails or something and I hear...
I'm like, what? And she's like, I burned it again. No, every morning. It's like an alarm clock. Every morning I do burn my toast and I have to try again. You guys want to wake up at like 9 a.m. on the dot? Just listen for KTL. I'm not very good at toast, but I'm convinced it's our toaster because it's not a good toaster. It's not a toaster. It's totally the toaster. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, listen. It's not my fault.
Yeah. It literally is everything your fault. Oh my gosh. You know what? Let's move on from my burnt toast. What were you going to say? No, I was going to ask. Well, Mav, did you ever at one point in your life have Riz? Oh, yes. Like, let me hear, let me hear like, like your first girlfriend. Here, I'll go first. Like, let me tell you a Riz story. Oh my gosh. I was single. I was single.
This girl... You're married, dog. Yeah, but... Your wife is right there. Yeah, but she said I don't have Riz anymore. No, you don't. You've been married a year and you've been in a serious relationship for three. I'm agreeing, so let me go back like four years here, all right? I was like 16...
And this girl is confessing her feelings for me. Okay. This isn't Riz. This is just mean. I know what you're saying. Yeah, this is actually like, okay, he's just mean. Like, you guys think it's mean? That was very, that was a mean thing to do to the girl. It's funny. Now you're making me not want to tell the story. No, no, no. Go ahead. Go ahead. It happened. Okay. So this girl's texting me and she's like,
out of nowhere, just confessing her feelings for me. And I was like, what? Like, not like, I like you. Like, I love you. She was like, I can't, I can't like just be friends with you. Like all this stuff. Did not expect this coming. Like I, okay. Like I kissed her like once. I expected it. But, huh? I think I expected it. I didn't. I, I barely knew this girl. And,
She's confessing her feelings for me. And my friend Michael is not the best influence, but he had a lot of Riz too. And his Riz, I was getting Riz off his Riz. No, no, no. Michael had no Riz without you.
I mean, we were definitely a duo. Oh my gosh, imagine if Michael heard you. Do you think Michael would agree or do you think Michael would disagree? I think we had a riz together. Yeah. I think we were like a negative and positive magnet. You guys were like wingmen. Wait, is that right? Negative and positive. You were the right wing, you were the left wing. And together the plane flew. Yeah. We were perfectly riz'd together. And this girl's confessing her feelings for me. And I was like, uh-oh, that's not what we wanted to see today. And he's like, don't worry. Just send eight ball pool.
And I was like, "You think so? You think so?" And he was like, "Yeah." So this girl was confessing her feelings for me in a paragraph on a text message. Multiple paragraphs. Multiple paragraphs. And I sent her eight ball pool. Like no response. On game messages? That's all I sent. Yes, on iMessage games. And she never played me back. Imagine if she played you back like today. Would you be like, "Hey, I'm so sorry, I'm married now."
Yo, if she ever went back and started playing the game today. Maybe you should follow up and be like, hey, I noticed you never played me back. Can we get this game going? I've been waiting a while. That would be so funny four years later. And I'm very honest, like, hey, can we play soon? That's so funny. Our first kiss, we had planned it out. Because if y'all didn't see the first podcast, I had a 13-year-old boyfriend and I
Um, I was dating him. So I was like, obviously I can't kiss cash, but you know, we had had that four hour hug. And so then when my boyfriend and I had broken up, I texted cash and I was like, Hey, when are you going to be back? You know? And then we started planning it. And then our first kiss, he had, um,
we'd planned it and I had to talk to my best friend. Uh, that was his cousin. And I was like, listen, girl, like cash is coming into town and we're going to kiss. And she was like, okay, we're going to kiss. She was like, she was like, okay. I was like, can I like borrow your bedroom to like kiss him in? And she was like,
I'm not even joking. Me and my other friend have a video. This was so bad. We put her on the ground and we pinned her down and we would not let her get up until she said I could use her bedroom. And like we sat on top of her and we were like, yes, that's a pretty big thing to do. Me and Lily like pinned her down and I felt so bad. And I'm so sorry, Haley, you did not deserve that. And so then she was like, okay, fine, fine. You can have my room for like 10 minutes. And I was like,
No. Cause like Cash and I, like we couldn't, like we never had time to be alone. We lived in different States. We saw each other like twice a year. Yeah. So we wanted to like be alone. And so she was like, and then we just put her down again and we were like, we need, I told her that she had to let us be in there. This is so romantic. It was. Yeah. Oh my gosh. And so I put my best friend on the ground. I held her down and I said, I'm going to need your bedroom for like an hour. And she was like, no. An hour for a first kiss? Well, I just want to like cuddle with him and stuff too. Yeah.
One time, I was in a hotel room with Michael again. Me and Michael. And...
There was four people. So two of the guys slept in this bed and two of me and Michael slept in this bed. And the other two guys got up at like 6 a.m. and left for the airport. So they get out and they left for the airport. And then the maid comes in our room at like 10 a.m. And me and him are still sleeping. But we're both in one bed instead of us being separate. And the maid comes in. Well, because we hadn't woke up yet. And the maid comes in and we both lean up and our shirts are off. And we lean up and she goes...
And we're like, no, no, no. No, no. Oh, my gosh. And I was like, no, no, you're good. You're good. And she's like, no, no, no. She's like walking in the hallway. I was like, no, no. Stop saying no. Stop saying no. We sleep in separate beds. Oh, my gosh. That was a bad one, too. So the other day. Oh. Guess what? Since Harper loves Mavericks Riz. Oh. Guess what Mavericks said to a girl. Oh, no. What did I say? Yes.
He probably doesn't even know what he said. Wait, was this at the resort? I know one of my friends called me the Wizard of Oz. No one said that. Yeah, they did. And I felt pretty good after that. Okay, listen. They said it to Kate. Kate was trying to interrupt my Riz. The Wizard of Oz. He said, let him cook. He's the Wizard of Oz. Yeah, he did say it. He said, let him cook. He's the Wizard of Oz. I can't say it. Rizard. Matt was Snapchatting this girl.
I was? Yes. And don't you interrupt me, Matt. Matt was Snapchatting this girl. Yeah. And she wasn't showing her face. So he says... I wasn't... No, I said don't interrupt me. Don't interrupt the dude. He texts back. He's like, I gotta see your face. And he texts back, show me that pretty face. I'm sorry.
That one hurts. And then I got one more. I got one more. And then the girl's taking too long to respond. So he sends a selfie of him smiling. Jeez. And he's jeezing. He said, yo, did you throw your phone across the ocean? You take so long to respond.
And then she thought that was funny. I do not believe this from how bad this is. Oh, gosh. No, that's bad. No, show me your pretty face. I said, yes, yes. I said, show me your pretty face. But listen, this girl...
I wasn't really interested in her. She was just really pretty. And I wanted to show one of my other friends. And I was like, yeah, sorry, dog. I can't show you a picture of her. She doesn't have Instagram. And she has an Instagram, but it only has a picture of her gerbil on it. Oh, that's a red flag. Oh, she's dressed like a gerbil. Not even a dog is a gerbil.
I know, I know. Not interested in this girl. I just wanted to show him a picture of her because she was really pretty. Because you pulled her, I guess. Maybe it was a joke. I mean, I got her Snapchat. Listen. I was like. If I were single and any man Snapchatted me, show me that pretty face. Immediately blocking. Immediately deleting Snapchat and immediately throwing my phone in the trash. That makes no girl smile. No girl goes, really?
Matt, the only way to read it is... Here's the thing. It wasn't my best move, but it was the only move I had because I went through every... We just sat there for like 15 minutes trying to come up with a Snapchat to get this girl to send a picture of her face. And then she takes forever to respond. Why don't you just say... Like what color your eyes are? She would have been like green with a picture of the wall. No, why don't you just say, hey, can you send me a picture of you? I liked your hair and I wanted to show it to my sister-in-law. She wants to dye her hair like yours or something.
That's just a random thing I said, but you could have came up with something like that. I just can't believe that y'all sat there for 15 minutes and all you could come up with was let me see that pretty face. Show me your pretty face, little girl. Harper. Yes? You had homecoming this week. How was that? I did. It was fun, but it was very stressful. I got ready with all my friends and they're so nice. I love them. Wait, before you get into your story. Oh, you got me a shirt. Jo, did you go into our closet?
Show it into my closet. No, I went into the laundry room. Oh, those were clean clothes in there. But does my hat look better like this? Am I a front type of guy? You're a back. You're definitely back. I always tell him back, but he never thinks back. Yeah, back for sure. I'm front. You're back. Not a hat type of guy. Not a hat type of guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'm going to keep the hat. Well, put your shirt on. So, my homecoming story. Put your shirt on.
Put your shirt on, buddy. Why do y'all want my shirt on? Because we're all scared. Because we don't want to see that. You got like pepperoni nipples. Whoa. Yeah, I'm a big bad. Okay, you're something. What if we just took off our shirts, Kate? Well, let's not do that. Tell your homecoming story. I'll put my shirt on. Three, two... Oh, you counted me down? One... Yeah, she's going to give you swats. I'm not a dog. Three, two...
one i got my own pace sweetheart all right well my my whole coming story it was fun so i loved getting ready with all my friends but um let's just say um so before i was like talking to this guy um because he broke up with his girlfriend and um harrison who harrison no oh some guy um yeah just some guy yeah what's his name make up a name i think you're in love with this guy that's what i think hat hat
So hat. No, it wasn't Harrison. And basically what happened was, so he broke up with his girlfriend. Then he started talking to three different girls. Three different girls. Wow. This story sounds familiar. He was using all of us for rebounds. All of us for rebounds. Oh, my gosh. Cool.
So basically, one of the girls that he's talking to right now, we're best friends. We're pretty close. And what happened was he... So he... So he what? And so what happened was... So basically, he... And so he... Hey!
Just talk normal. Show them who's boss Harper. Oh, so. Oh, yeah. So what happened was. So. Hey. That's it. How do you put your shirt on? It is on. No, that's like a crop top. I don't like that. A little too much. I do probably look a little sus. You do. Not gonna lie. Yeah. I'm not sus. Fix your hat. I think you look suspicious. See, look. I'm straight.
So, Harper, go on. Anyways, um, wait, so, after that, um, he, uh... Why are you looking at me? You guys are stressing her out now. Yeah, y'all are stressing me out so bad. Listen, all I hear over here is, um, so's, ands, so I can't even pay attention. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Um, okay, okay. Oh, my gosh. Okay, so, basically, after that, me and that, me and his, the girl that he's talking to right now are pretty close, and he was, like, making her very uncomfortable last night. Oh, my gosh.
And I was also there and he was like, hi, Harper. And then he kept flirting with the two of us at the same time. But he would keep it in secret. And then two days ago, he kissed this other girl. He's such a player. Sounds like a legend to me. No, he's a player and he's mean. So that's my story. Matt was at a prom and he wanted to be cool and show off in front of this girl. And he did a backflip. He did a backflip.
And he broke both of his feet. I did multiple backflips. At the same time. Like, actually broke them? He went...
There was a sear. Broke both his feet. Did he cry? I bet he cried. No, I didn't cry at all. No, you cried. I didn't cry at all. Did he walk off like, oh? Nope. Oh, what? I walked off like he was fine. Dude, shut up. You always try to make yourself sound so cool. I literally drove home on two broken feet. I was fine. I acted very fine. I didn't even tell mom and dad for two days. The sweetest thing was one time he was driving, so when the boys were moving from California to Dallas, Cash had to drive his car. I don't remember this. Uh-huh.
He had to drive his car. This story is 100% false. Oh. What did he do? I actually don't know. He stopped on the side in New Mexico and he like picked sunflowers but he said that they were super because sunflowers are like pretty thick and they're hard to pick so he had to like
cut it with his key but his key wasn't working anyways he put them on his dash in the car because he still had like in a good 48 hours before he'd see me because he was driving from LA to Texas and he came to me and it was like 2 in the morning and I was sleeping in his parents living room waiting for him to get home and he comes to me with these saddest droopiest looking sunflowers and he was like I
I got you flowers out of New Mexico. I was like, when were you in New Mexico? And he's like, two days ago and I drove through it and I was like, aw. Okay, all that to say I picked flowers. But dude, you know sunflowers are the hardest flowers to pick because they grow from the sun? See, he wants to hide them. All flowers. Did you just say they grow from the sun?
Like, what do you even mean? Do you need to go back into school? No, sunflowers. First of all, do y'all know why they're called sunflowers? Don't they follow the sun? Yeah, they grow from the sun, so they grow stronger because they follow the sun. You ever seen a sunflower that's made it all the way to the sun? Listen, a flower that's not pointing towards the sun is going to grow less strong than a flower that's constantly pointing towards the sun.
Huh? Uh, so... I don't know. I think it has to do with photosynthesis. I don't think it has to do with... Just go pick sunflowers and you'll realize I had to use my key as a knife. It's hard. You can't just pick them up out of the ground. Oh, yeah? I can. One time he did that. He picked normal flowers and he brought them to me, like off the side of the road.
And they had bugs in them, but I never told you that. That's the other thing about sunflowers. They got a lot of bugs. By the time he gave those ones to me, the bugs were all dead. But this night, he gave them to me, and the bugs were like crawling all over my desk. Got a few little extra gifts there. I brought you some food with it. Is that about it? I called a girl, and I said, I said, I said, do you want to go on a date?
I like used those words. Like I made it very clear. Like this is a date, not just like hanging out as friends. Yeah. She said yes. Good. Yeah. Was this? She sounded excited. Okay. Was this? Was this? Was this? Was this? Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me. No, let me finish talking. There's no questions yet. This is no talking. Let me finish my questions. Then I said, we talk on the phone for a minute. We're like talking about when we can do this.
We're talking about when we're going to go out and she's like, okay, I can't do this Saturday. I'll text you dates I'm available. I'm like, okay, sit. I wait like a day. She doesn't send me the dates. I'm like, okay. Well, I'll just send her a follow-up text saying, hey, I'm free this weekend, but I'll be out of town when it gets closer to Christmas. So just text me over the dates you're available. Yeah. No response.
I'm getting ghosted. Was it a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader? It was somebody. Why do you keep asking who it was? I think it was her. We don't know who it was. We don't know at all. It could be anyone. I mean, honestly, I don't. Yes, it was her. Okay, Claire is ghosting me. Yeah, she said yes to a second date. She said the blind date went so bad. Claire, I don't blame you. I really don't. I don't blame her either.
I didn't see it, but what does it say? What does it say? I don't know. Did you read it? No. Oh, never mind. I'll show you later. Oh. But yeah. Wait, I think I got it out. Wait. Do you think if I gave you permission, you could find me a better wife than I could find myself? I could find... Paige.
Paige. I think I can track her down for you. Yeah, listen. We need to drop the Paige thing. No, I'm not dropping that till the day I die. No. Listen, me and Paige, we've known each other like five or six years. We're good friends. We're going to leave it at that. No, y'all are going to marry each other.
No, I could never date Paige for the pure fact that she has kissed my brother. Whoa. What? Yeah, that's not true. Oh, yeah, I remember that. Yes, I can't. I can't. It would never happen. Yeah, I really do wish you would do that because I would have ammo on you for the rest of my life. Anytime he'd get mad at me, I'd be like, yeah, well, I've kissed your girlfriend.
So you can't have that. That's unacceptable. Can't have that. No, but wouldn't that be just so perfect? No. That's what I'm saying. You and Paige are best friends and you and Maverick are enemies. So girly. No, like literally, it would just be so fun. No, but I am worried about for whoever Matt picks because whoever Matt picks, I got to be like this width because if not, that's awkward. Listen, me and their sister are like this and the other girl's got to come in and she's got to fit like this.
And I'm scared he's gonna fit someone that fits like that. Yeah. Like that doesn't go in. And he definitely will. What if I pick someone and then her and my sister get really tight and then you're the odd one out? That just wouldn't happen. That would be crazy. Me, lady. I would not want to be around for that. Nope, that's not happening. Guys, I need a wife. We gotta put out applications or something. Yeah. We got you. Someone make a Facebook post. I make a lot of those on Facebook Market.
I bet you can find some keepers. Should I take that up? They have a Facebook dating thing on Facebook. They literally have a Facebook market for single people? That's, nope, nope. There is absolutely a good... You just scroll, man? Is this still available? No, there has to be somebody. Best offer. I got 60.
Listen, there has to be at least one woman between the ages of 18 and like 24 that watches this podcast that is a fit for Maverick. And if so, don't reach out to Maverick. Reach out to me because I have to verify you before you go to Maverick. You gotta go through the approval process. Yeah, if you're not approved by me and Cash, you're not making the cut. Just DM Kate your applications. Yes, all applications go to at KateMaurice underscore on Instagram. If she doesn't answer, just email her. Nope, don't send it. I'm logged into the email. Don't email Maverick.
First of all, we walked in and it's just... And I said it loud where she could hear. Yeah, it's just all female waitresses and hostess and everything. They were a lot of cute ones. They're all like young. And Matt turns as soon as we walk in. We're the only people at the hostess. We've never been there. It's just her, her and us. It's quiet. She hears him clearly. He turns around and goes, I like this restaurant. And we were like, yo. Was it Hooters or something?
No. And I started busting up laughing. Anyways, we sit down. I was like, Matt, go talk to her. He goes, okay. And he gets up and there's three of them there. And I don't know what he said, but he had all three of them laughing and giggling and everything. And I was like, hmm, that's pretty good. That's pretty good. So I'll say his Riz level has definitely gained since then. I do remember when Cash and I first started dating, I was 15. And we...
though we were private for a whole two weeks. Can you hand me the water? Yeah. We were private for a whole two weeks before a video of us accidentally got posted, but it wasn't. And not posted by a stranger. Kate posted it. I dropped the phone on my, that sounds so fake. Guys, I was like, maybe it was fake. No, I swear. Maybe she wanted to get leaked. Maybe she wanted to be famous. No, because remember, I dropped the phone on my face and I was like, oh my gosh, it posted. And I told Cash, I was like, Cash, the video posted and he took the phone and he deleted it.
Wasn't it like 30 minutes later? No, it was right then and there. I was like, oh my gosh, it posted. But because it was Snapchat, you know how there's multiple frames? It was just a video of us laying down on an air mattress together or something on the floor of my friend's room. And I dropped the phone on my face and the video posted to Snapchat, but it was multiple frames. So I freaked out and I was like, catch the video posted. And so he takes his phone and he deletes the first frame, but he didn't delete the second frame. And then like five minutes later, I was like... My phone was blowing up. It was just...
But I put my phone down and it was on silent and I reached up and I was like, you know the swipe ups I had was wild. Yeah, that was, it was, yeah. And so that's, and then, and then we were public and I was being really harassed by like 10 year old girls.
Really? It really was a heavy weight on me. Oh, was it? It was. I was so self-conscious. I was called like... I had hate pages and death threats and people telling me that... They were funny. They would morph her photos. Some of them were funny. They would try to make Kate fat and morph her photos. Now they wouldn't even have to edit. I found a picture. I took a screenshot of this one comment because Cash had a couple weeks... Good thing she did not hear that. What? No, nothing. Anyways...
Oh my gosh. No, so Hoco is coming up, homecoming, if y'all don't know what Hoco is. But, you know, so... Do you have a date? No. Are you going to get a date? I wish. What about Harrison? Oh, no, he has a girlfriend. Oh, dude. Oh my gosh. No, his girlfriend's really nice, though. Aw. Like, she's really nice, and she's really pretty, but...
What? Do you miss him or something? No. No, I don't. Oh, my goodness. Are you happy for them? No. Oh, yeah. No. So basically, I have to tell you something. So if y'all go to my school, y'all know who it is. I'm not going to say my school on here, obviously. But if y'all go to my school, ask me to ho-co because I want a mom and I want a sign. You want a date? Yeah. Aw. Aw.
Everyone doesn't know what a mum is. I was going to say, mums are so weird, bro. It's a Texas thing. I lived across the border in Oklahoma. I never knew what a mum was. I crossed the border and everybody's like, you want my mum? You want my mum? Mums are mad weird. In high school, in Texas high schools, there's these things called mums. I don't even know how to describe them. I'd describe it. It's like a first place ribbon, but bigger, massive. Imagine you won first place in like
What's like a ribbon type of competition? Like a dog show. Imagine you won first place in like the ultimate dog show and the ribbon's this tall. And the ribbon, you wear it across your chest all day. The girl does. The guy makes them. The guy makes them for the girl. Extra heavy. And then the girl makes him like one that it's a lot smaller, but it like goes on his arm. It's a cute thing. Every time this man breaks up,
Same thing like clockwork, bro. He puts his hoodie up. He puts beats on. Oh, my gosh, yeah. And he just plays music and he walks around with his hood up like this. I don't want to ask me nothing. That's all he does. I was not like that. Y'all. Don't talk to me about it. I didn't know. So how were they? Except for the last one. The first one. Okay. Which one hurt you the most? The last one. Oh, my gosh. What breakup hurt you the most? Why are we doing this?
The first, the second, or the third? Which one hurt me the most? Oh, I could answer that. It was the last one. Yeah, definitely the last one. Definitely the last one. Yeah. Yeah, the last one was a little rough. If you had to go back to one of your exes, which one are you going back to? First, second, or third? Sabrina. Well, I don't really know my first one that well anymore. Yeah, you were like 16. Yeah, I was like 16. I haven't seen her in like four years. But she's getting married, so we'll just take her off the table.
I feel like this is mean to either of them if they watch this. No, it's not. Just like which one, like if you just were choosing one to marry. Probably just because of the way things ended with the last one, I would probably go back to Kaylee.
Okay, he just said the name. Name dropping. Are you kidding me? Oh, was I supposed to say someone else? Oh, oof. I thought you were going to say the second one. No, it's fine. Everyone knows who the second one is. Oh, I mean, yeah. But we're on good terms with her too, though. Yeah, Kaylee's cool. Yeah, yeah. The last one, it just didn't end. What was that face? End on bad terms. What was what face? I don't know. You were like...
You can just make faces at you. Yeah, I will say, I think that the second relationship, it just seemed more like y'all just like, y'all's personalities just were not clicking and stuff. So I think you guys ended that like. The second relationship, yeah, it just was never going to work. We tried to make it work, tried to change each other and stuff. Yeah. Yeah, it just never worked. Yeah. Your first statement. So the real one. Okay. One truth, one lie. Yeah. I can bench press 450.
Ma'am, no, come on. And I'm in love with your wife. Somebody get this guy out of here. Call the police. Oh, my God. Okay, no, I actually have a real one. Keep going. No, keep going. Let him cook. I went to Florida with my friend Michael and we were hanging out with these two girls. Yeah, I know this story. Yeah, you already told this.
You guys do not know this story. You don't know this story. And we were hanging out with these two girls. And they got stranded. No. That was Hawaii. And then I liked one of them.
Right? What? That's why I wasn't going to tell the story. But she was like, you gotta tell the story. Hey, Kate, you kind of look like that one. Oh, me and this girl are like this now. We love each other. They're like best friends now. I thought you liked the other one. Oh, no, I liked the other one. The one she's best friends with is not the one I liked. But anyways, so I like this one.
And I was like... Wow, you definitely had a type now that I'm looking at Kate. And the other two girls? Yeah. Yeah, they were all identical. Well, let's not forget about the one. Okay, okay. Oh. All right. Let me go to the store. Everyone has a low point in life, Kat. Okay. We're in Florida. Me went for Michael and these two girls. I liked one of them. And then I was like, okay, I guess she doesn't like me back. So I'm just going to go for the other one. And I didn't really like the other one. I was just like...
I don't know. That's what you do when you're 16, I guess. I don't know. And then we go to the beach and we went at like 6 a.m. because we stayed up like all night. And then we go to the beach at 6 a.m. and I kiss her on the beach in the water. Oh my gosh. Like the notebook or something. And then. This isn't the one he liked though. This is the other girl. This isn't the one I liked. Oh, so the one you liked is just watching you kiss her friend? Yes. Okay. Dude, you got some crazy game. I don't know what you're trying to do. I was like, and then.
And then, so I was kissing her. How old were you? I was like 16. Oh my gosh. This is why you don't let your 16 year olds travel alone. Yeah, for real. My parents were like, we can't let you travel. You're going to be kissing girls. I was like, no. And then Michael is stuck with the other girl and they're just like standing there and also in the water, just like watching us kiss. So they're just like, so then the one I liked tried to start kissing Michael and
And Michael didn't want to kiss her. Trying to make you jealous? And Michael didn't want to kiss her. So he just starts dunking her underwater. Oh, no. Yes. And so I'm kissing this girl that I don't even like. And Michael is dunking the one I like underwater. He's just like, this is literally what he was saying. He was going, breathe. Breathe. And this dude, I was like, oh, my gosh.
And I was like, Michael, why didn't you just like, like do something out? Like, why don't you just kiss her? Like you guys could just talk. You don't have to dunk her underwater. He was like, I don't want to take any chances. I don't want to kiss you. Yeah. Well, Matt's never hugged me. So I get where you're coming from. Wait, can you guys hug? Hug?
Why did I bring that back up? No, I was going to bring it up at the right time. I'm not hugging. That'd be so weird on camera. No, please just hug real quick. It'd be the awkwardest hug you've ever seen. And we'll be out of frame. Oh my gosh, get on your knees and hug. I bet the frame don't even go that high. No, it does. Just hug. Joe, does the frame go that high? I don't want to hug. Yeah, no, no. I think he might be wrong. Please, please, please, please. Let's harmonize and say please. So please. You can't harmonize. Please.
You're gonna have to harmonize with her. She can't do it. There you go. Okay, that's enough. So y'all are gonna hug? Wait, guys, you're gonna be so romantic. And maybe like a little like on the cheek. What? Like how Italian people do. This is Germany. Wait, well, do you guys know how to hug each other? Harper and I can show you. Yeah.
No, that's okay. We don't need to see- We know what a hug look- Y'all are gonna hug me, Maverick. Y'all don't know what a hug- Hug me. No. Now hug me. Please! It's been 20 years and y'all have never hugged. Why would I hug you? I'll be the bigger man. Get off your pony. Oh. Oh. Oh. No. Listen. Oh, gosh. Okay. Okay. Oh, shoot. I thought I was going to laugh. Yeah, yeah. Oh. I just realized- Oh. Oh.
oh
So... You would fall like that. I guess that was their first hug. He fell like a rock. Oh, yeah, like he does when he swims. Yeah, it was like... Okay, so that was their first hug. That was their first hug, and it was so cute. Cash, if you had to choose to be with one person the rest of your life...
Because I live here too. Uh-huh. Oh. Like if Kate said, Maverick has to move out, would you tell her to leave or would you make me leave? Oh! Wait, so you're saying only one of you can live in the house? Yeah. And by the way, blood does not require, and by the way, love does not require blood. It requires love. But blood is strong. That's so inspirational. That was empathetic. I like what she said, I think.
No, I mean, family doesn't require blood. It requires love. Oh. So you have to watch out for that. Okay. I call it the door man. Choose carefully. So your question is, if I had to live here with one of you, who would it be? Well, like, yeah, if Kate said it's me or Mav, who are you picking? I mean, she does stuff for me that you just can't do. So it's like... She cooks, she cleans. Yeah, like, you're not doing none of that for me. If anything, you make my life harder by, like, tearing apart the house. Yeah.
And doing nothing. She like cooks and cleans and like. And she tells you what you think. You know, takes care of me and like. But like. You just kind of make a mess and. But I've been there like since you were born. You know? Yeah. Every day. Yeah. Of every hour. You have. I helped you learn to walk. Where would you be without me? You probably pushed me down when I was learning how to walk. No. Wait, where would you be without me? No.
Same place. Really? So, yeah, I'm thinking she literally came in the picture like two years ago. Me? Two years ago. What math are you math in? Bro. He's doing boy math, not girl math. That was a bad, unbreakable question. You pretty much just said, like, do you like your wife over me? Well, that's a little harsh. Wow. You got another one, maybe? Like...
Well, I didn't expect to really get past that one, to be honest. Wait, why did my toes hurt? He didn't plan that far in advance. I thought this would be a little bit long conversation between y'all two. Oh, Matt was such an instigator. And we're going to go on a blind date. No, Matt was like, I don't know why you would think I would choose you. I don't know either. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Oh, I know what you're saying. Yeah. What is that supposed to mean? Just, I know things that you don't know, Kate. Okay.
Why are you blinking at him like that? He's just blinking. Don't think too much into it. Oh my gosh. You know what I just saw? He said, but, or no, I like Kate. What the? No, you said, he said, I like Kate better than a wink to Maverick. First of all, that did not happen. It did. She lied. Why are you shaking your head yes? Like, yes, that happened, or no, that didn't happen? It did happen. I'm sorry. Wow. And they're broken, just like that. See, I knew it.
They were unbreakable. I knew it. Is your heart broken into pieces? Shattered. That was a really fun game, guys. I'm really glad we played. So I think to confirm that it's over. No, you don't get stuff because you fiddle with it. Would you? So is it me or Maverick if you had to live with one of us? Because you never actually answered. My Xbox. That's crazy. I would go with Maverick too. That's not a choice. No, I'm kidding.
Harper? Yeah? I have a question. Yeah? Out of everyone on the podcast, who's your favorite co-host? Absolutely not. What? You. Really? Yeah. You don't mean that. I do. Look, I know me and you have had our differences. You're not my favorite. Just face it. I just think we have the best chemistry. Oh.
We provide the best entertainment. Y'all beef too hard. I say we all go around the room and we say one good thing about each other. And one bad thing. About the podcast. Like, you do good on the podcast for this. And then a bad thing. And then you suck at this. Yeah, and then you suck at this. Okay, okay, okay. Okay, Kate, you go first. No, I'm not going first. Okay, Harper, you go first. Okay, Kate, you're really good. Oh, so you're really good at...
Wait, wait, I'm thinking, I'm thinking, I'm thinking. Maybe you should start out with the bad thing. Okay, so you're really... That one's easier. I'm trying to think, I'm trying to think. I'm waiting. Oh, you're really good at making me feel at home. Mm-hmm.
Oh, is it because I brought you snacks? Yeah. Yeah. And I give you a new shirt each episode because you always forget to bring your own. Yeah. And if you're really bad at... She's not hesitating. And then you're really bad at... I really don't know. Oh, come on. You say stuff all the time. There's so many bad things about Kate. No, I really don't know. Like, I really don't know what you're bad at. Like, singing? Yeah.
Yeah, that's true. I just say your turn. That's true. You did give it a... Okay, Cash, it's your turn. No, you're next. She picks you. Who do I say? Oh, who do I say it about? You can pick any of us three. But you can't pick Harper. Okay. Well, I thought we had to say... I thought I was going to say something bad about each of y'all and then she was going to say something bad about each... I thought we were going to do everyone. Oh, yeah. Good idea. That's a good idea. Well, she picked you, so now it's your turn. Okay. Yeah, you go. Say something about Mav. Maverick? What if I wanted to do you? Okay, do me. Okay, but what if I wanted to do Maverick? Then do Maverick. Okay.
Let's see. Who should I do? Harper, who should I do? Wait, no, no. Harper, do me. That's what I was saying. That's what we were saying. That's going to take forever. Okay, I'll go fast. I'll go fast. I'll go fast. So Cash is really bad at his style. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. I mean, what are those jeans? It's got camouflage in the knee patches. Yo. I'll just take it. I'll just take it. All right. What am I good at? What am I good at? You're good at...
Getting holes in your socks. Oh my gosh, that's so true. That was just another bad thing. No. Give me an actual compliment. Okay. Come on. You're going to get me brand deals? I don't know. I really don't know. I guess that works. Okay, so me, I'm great at everything. Oh, you're doing yourself. I'm joking. So, Matt, you are really bad at...
There's a lot. This one's going to be long-awaited. Hard for just everything you've been feeling. Unleash it now. Okay. You're really bad at... Oh, Jesus. You're really bad... He's going to cry. He's going to cry. I'm not going to cry. This is like the biggest thing. He's like... This is like the... I don't... You're really bad at dancing.
That might should have stayed unsaid. Yeah, some things are better left unsaid. I think you've got to compliment him now. You better hurry. Oh no, I see tears forming. You look really bad. Oh wait, you have better style than Cash.
I'll take it. All right, go fast. Matt, say something good and bad about everyone. Okay, off the top of your head. Kate is really, really good at freaking...
Oh, what? Cooking. She's really good at cooking. Okay, now bad thing, bad thing. Bad thing, she always brings grandma vibes to the podcast with the blanket. That is true. Me, me, me, me, me. Wait, I was so harsh. Cash is really good at keeping the podcast on track. Cash is really bad at interrupting people in the middle of their stories. That's totally not true. Well, I said it. No, dude, you just interrupted him. Harper is really...
annoying so she's really bad that's true shut your mouth that's all I want to talk to you she's also really good at annoying me oh there's that oh those two were the exact same things okay Cash you are I'm first oh so good at finding a new fun chair to sit in each week
You are good at that. He does. It's incredible. Yeah, it really is incredible. Thanks, guys. Your... Your style isn't even that bad, actually. What? Yeah, I felt kind of bad. Your socks aren't even that bad. Cash, you are really bad about...
Not going into the bathroom when you have to fart and just farting. I'll take it. I'll take it. I stand strong in that. Yep, and it's really gross. All right, go. Me, me, me. Harper, you are really good at the podcast. You're good at it. That's it? Just the general podcast? No, you're good. You're like funny. You're entertaining. You're off the walls. Your hair needs fixing.
No. She looks kind of stupid. Yeah. There you go. Okay. Anyways, what did I just say? You're really good at the podcast? You are
really bad about like zoning out sometimes and you just like pick it yourself or you'll just like stare off into space. All right, Maverick, Maverick. You are, you are really good at making me feel bad right now because you're giving me the sad puppy dog eyes. Oh, So that's a great quality you have. Thank you. Your map does make Kate feel bad a lot. I'm not gonna lie. I do? Yeah. All right, what's his good thing? Or what's his bad thing? You're really bad about, sometimes you make jokes that hurt my feelings. Oh,
That's fair. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, my turn, my turn. Who should I start with? Kate. All right, Kate, you are really good at... Dog, she's your wife. Come on, say something good. Yeah, you're really good at making the bed. Oh. Wow. That's what I'm good for. I wake up in the morning and our bed gets made. And you're really bad at... Let's see. You're really bad at making the bed. Oh. You're really bad at...
Cooking chicken. Oh my gosh. I don't want to talk about it. It's not good. Oh, that's not good. If you want salva vanilla poisoning. Salina vanilla poisoning. I got you. Salva vanilla poisoning. Salmonella. Salmonella. That's what you're trying to say? He said
Salmonella. I thought you said vanilla poisoning. No, no, no. Wait, hold on. It's salabonella poisoning. Nope. How do you say it? Salmonella. Salmonella. Salmonella? Wait, let me think because now I'm forgetting. All right, well, whatever it is, just trust me, she can give it to you. Oh, no. She's got it. What? Harper, you are really good at...
Oh. Oh. This is harder than I thought. Oh. Oh, shoot. Harper's really good. You know, it's bad that my first thing comes to is annoying, too. But you know what? I'm not going to hit. I can't double up on answers. What is with the annoyingness? I, like, am not annoying. No. No. Definitely not. Oh. Oh. Oh. We both just made that up. Yeah. No. You're really good at...
Not paying attention. Yeah. And you're really bad at... Yeah, thanks for blaming that on my ADHD. And you're really bad at... We never said anything about that. That was you. I don't even know if you have ADHD. I think you're faking it. I'm sorry. I think everyone is faking ADHD and colorblindness. Everyone that has that, I'm so sorry that he said that. Yeah, yeah. He doesn't mean it. Colorblindness, I'm sorry. There is... You know there's no way to prove it? I think there is. No, no, no.
There's not listen I could call it color red. Are you good? You can go in color red. Are you good? Yeah, I'm fine Anyways, ma'am, you're really good at oh, sorry. Oh, you're really good Fake laughing I am I had a lot of fake laughter and he does your jokes aren't funny. Oh what? Y'all see my fake laugh when he does this right here. Oh
No, sometimes that's real. No, it's like the high-pitched one, like, ah! He's like, ah! That's not true. Those are real. He's like, take it back. And then you're really bad at, oh. You're really bad at touching your microphone. Oh. I'm bad at touching it? Yeah, you're bad at touching it. You touch it way too much. Oh. Okay, stop! What?
Now that we've all got that off our chest. This is why you bore everyone. So you just yawned. You're like, you dress like a grandma. You got a blanket on you. She dresses like a grandma, says the slowest stories possible. Y'all don't know what style is. What? That's like the vibe. Next part, she's going to be sitting there knitting. Guys.
Well, okay, actually, so I had the blanket for a while on the podcast, and then, oh, Cash gets mad when I put my hair behind my ears like this. Why? It just doesn't look as good.
Oh. Anyways. But she had bought so many piercings for no reason. How is everyone going to see the holes I put in my ear myself? Yeah. No one likes ears. Yeah. Nobody. And I've never met somebody that's like, wow, look at all those piercing. That looks great. Look at all those ears. I had the blanket for the first few episodes. And then somebody named James Baker, my father-in-law, told me that the blanket looked terrible and I need to get rid of it. And I listened to him. And then I decided, you know what, James Baker? I like my blanket.
So I brought it back. You know he's watching this right now. Yep. James Baker, I saw your comment. I remember when you said... He commented, bro. Dad commented. And Kate was like, your dad commented on the video. And he just said, lose the blanket. And in the next episode, he said, glad she got rid of that terrible blanket. Bro. Okay. It's okay, James. I forgive you. But the blanket's here to stay. How many girls have you kissed since your last girlfriend? Thank you.
I like this question. This is a fun question. Yeah, how many girls have you kissed since your last girlfriend? Yeah Yeah, well, uh-huh I'll have you know, uh-huh I can't say I was gonna say Joe. All right zero man has no game. What? How many girls I reject it? Oh, no, he did beautiful ones. Oh
Yeah, but you could just lie. Zero. I would never do that. No, I'm kidding. Uh,
Listen, this is awkward. No, I just, I don't, I don't know. I don't go around just like kissing people. I'm not cash. Like that's not what I do. Whoa, whoa, whoa. How many girls have you kissed? I'm married. What are you talking about? Okay, right before you got married, how many girls did you kiss? Did you even know that I'm married? Like what? Why would you ask me that? Before y'all started dating, the like six months before, how many girls did you kiss in that period? Whoa, we're not just jumping straight to me, man. How about you tell me? I'm clean. I'm clean. What is your kiss count?
What is my kiss count? You're trying to embarrass me. That's messed up. Is it one? No. What's your kiss count in your entire life? He's had three girlfriends, so there's at least three. There's... It's four. Just face. I know. Yeah. See, I know. Just face literally
I know, I'm lame, okay? It's four. He's 23 next week. No, I'm not lying, yo. I'm not lying. Oh. I'm not. I'm a 23-year-old and I've kissed four people. Harper, my... It's respectful. I'm not saying it's a bad thing. Harper, what's your kiss count? I'm not saying. Smart kid. Listen. Come on. No, zip it. Don't trust him. Come on. Wait. I thought you only kissed one. Wait, can you whisper it to me? Was it just one? Whisper it.
How many? I heard. Did she say six? Yes. That's what it sounded like. It sounded like she said six. Six? No, she didn't say that. Yes, she did. No, I did. I said like one. She said six. No, she said six. I'm growing up. Wait, six? Wow. When? I tried to cover for you. In the summer. What? What?
This summer? All of them? It was a weekend back in the summer. No, I mean... We went to the lake house last Friday. Like, what do you mean, though? Like, how many people have you kissed... How many guys have you kissed in your entire life? Like, besides... Well, I did that... After the age of, like, 10. Like, you can't be, like, 7 years old. Or, like, a toddler, you know? Oh, at the age of 10, then, like...
even 10 i wouldn't consider like no yeah i'd say you're like like 12 when you actually started like when you first like had like your real first kiss and you were like you know my real first kiss was harrison or harrison well yeah we knew that yeah yeah so it's your total well that was like back in april so now you're at like you know she's lying she only kissed like one or two guys i'm 23 i kissed four yeah and your guy
What does that mean? I just feel like guys kiss more girls. Yeah, I feel like girls are more innocent. What? No, girls are. Also, they're not like make out. They're like. Yeah. That's still a kiss. A kiss on the cheek. No, not actually. But like. Wait. I am so confused. Like, when did you kiss six guys and not tell us? I'm so hurt. Yeah, for real.
I thought we were your friends. She's lying. Look at that face. I'm not. That's a lying. I hope my mom doesn't see this face. I think she's telling the truth. Yeah, I'm lying. Name them. Go. Yeah, I'm lying. I'm not naming them. She's trying to get out of it. It's six. I know it's six. Oh, yeah. Cash can't even name all the girls he's kissed. Yeah, wait. How many girls have you kissed? 14,000? I can name random girl names and he's probably kissed them. You probably kissed a Sydney. Rebecca? How many Sydneys you kissed? Okay.
What about...
Charlie. What about Savannahs? Oh, you definitely kissed some Savannahs. Oh, I got one. I got one. I'm not going to lie. Big toes. Yeah. How many big toes? What about Emily? There was definitely an Emily in there. Harper's two for two. Okay. Okay. Let's see. Harper's actually two for two, which is crazy because there's not that many. Yeah. Oh, he's definitely kissed some Charlies. I know he's kissed some Charlies. Charlie. Charlie D'Amelio, man. No, no, no. Charlies?
Okay, these were all when I was like 15, 16. Yeah, I know you kissed some pages. I know that. I feel really good at this game. That's terrible. Oh, I go in, I go in. Probably shouldn't say actual names because we're not friends with these girls. You kissed any Madisons? Wait, who is it? I'll bleep it. He'll bleep it. Amber? That was a... Oh. No. Why did you have to like... I don't even think he has to bleep that. Did you say Amber? Kate?
He did kiss a Kate one time. Probably more than one time. Probably a couple of Kates. Oh, he's definitely kissed some Sarahs. Oh my gosh. How many Sarahs? Tell me how many Sarahs right now. What about Brooks? Because I can name two Brooks. Brooks, Brooklands, they're all the same thing. Y'all are just naming people that you know have kissed. You know how many germs you've exchanged?
- Right? - That-- - Britney's? Don't tell me you kissed a Britney. - I don't think I've ever kissed a Britney. - Skylar? - I've met some crazy Britneys. If you're named Britney, I know you're crazy. - Skylar? - Oh, she is three for three! - What? - This is wild!
I'm good. How many have I got right? Olivia. You guys know several of them. Olivia. Olivia. Oh, he's definitely kissed some Olivias. No. You told me you haven't kissed an Olivia. No. Honestly, just go through the top 10 white girl names of like 2003. Maddie. Maddie. Welcome to Factor Cap, where Cash lies the whole time. You've definitely kissed some Olivias. And a Maddie. I'll give each one of y'all five.
Five guesses each. Madison. We already know. Okay, but it can't be ones you guys know. I know like four. It can't be ones you already know. Okay, Amber. You guys said it can't be ones you already know. I don't know the girl. I've never met the girl. No, but you know I've kissed an Amber, so you gotta guess random. Oh, we're trying to guess random names? Yeah. Emma. Ashley. Emma. Ashley. I don't think so. Emma, you never kissed an Amber. Yeah. I don't think so. Rachel. He honestly doesn't remember their names though either. Rachel.
If I asked you to name all 27 people you have kissed? Gosh, that's a crazy number. Because the crazy part is he's been dating. It was totally 27. Wait, you know it was 37, right? Oh my goodness. What?
Bro. But listen, but it was all in one summer. No, no, no. You're dirty. You're filthy. You're a bad boy. I was 15, 16. I got 37 other girls sloppy seconds. Oh, Mia. Mia. There's definitely a Mia. No, but he tried. Amelia? Yeah. No. Charlotte? Yes. I thought all Charlottes were innocent. Sophia? Yeah. Yeah.
I don't remember 37 names. That's the thing. If I don't, maybe. I don't remember. There's definitely a Hannah in there. A Hannah? Yeah. Oh.
It probably is. You literally just said you don't remember their name. Hey, Hannah, if you're watching, go ahead and comment. You let us know. It's just going to be full of people saying it. Yeah, it's going to be like, he kissed me in 2018. If anybody in Cash has kissed watching this, please leave the story in the comments below. Did he ever kiss fans? Yeah, did you ever kiss fans? Every weekend. Are you kidding me? No, I didn't kiss fans. Ew. What about those two fans that wouldn't leave you all alone and then you all kissed them? You guys kissed them.
First of all, don't ever tell a story like that. What about those two fans that wouldn't leave you alone so you don't kiss them? You kissed them and then they wouldn't leave you alone. It's an accident. Accidents happen. It's not an accident. You accidentally didn't know they were fans? Oh, are your lips magnetic or something? So, these two girls, this one girl was crying.
So you kissed her to make her feel better? No, not. Did the kisses help? Wipe those tears away, you pretty girl. Oh my gosh. Wait, put your mic down. Oh, someone's mad right now. Oh, this is good. This girl was crying. I was, I was, I was, I don't even know if I was 16 yet. Minds your age matter. All that matters is that you sucked. Well, it's important for people to know. Suck their lips. Listen, I was 16. Ew!
I was 16. This girl was crying at VidCon. Aww. And then she had a twin sister, identical. Oh, wow. Who was also standing right next to her. And I was like, Parker. I remember the twins. I remember the twins. I was like, you won't go like. They were pretty. I was like, you won't go just like walk up to her and like hug her. The ones with straight hair? You do not know these people. I'm pretty sure I met them. The blonde twins? No, you didn't.
No. Did they come over to Airbnb? Were they fans or were they social media people? No, I don't think. Because I know what the social media is. They know a lot of questions, guys. Okay, were they fans? No, no, no, no, no. Wait a minute, you have kissed a fan. Oh, wait, you just kissed many fans. No, no, no, I was thinking of the other one. Okay, listen. And then, actually, I can't tell this story because like. Continue, please.
Is it mean? Don't throw Parker under the bus, though. I've kissed a James, Noah, Oliver, Liam, Henry, Benjamin, Lucas, Elijah, Jack, Jaden, Daniel, Michael, Thomas, David, Alexander, Samuel, Ethan, Jacob, Leo, Theodore, John, Anthony, Mason, Jackson.
That was just Google. That's impressive. Yeah, it's just Google men's names. There's no way. No? Anyways, Parker went up and hugs the girl. And then I walked up. And then the weirdest thing I've ever experienced in my life. They were just, Parker hugs one. And then the other one looks at me and goes, I want to hug somebody. And then just hugs me. And then I was like, okay. That's like the epitome of like 15 year olds. 15 year old? I had a, and then we kissed them.
Okay, see and then and then they want to leave us alone like pet and then and then we saw him at another event I've only paid another event like a year later and they're like hi guys. We were like, oh
What's up? No, I had a girl the other day, older than me, was like, can I get a hug? I need a hug right now. Nope. And I was like. Kissing's low-key kind of gross. I was like, you need a hug? It is. It's gross. Especially kissing random people. Kissing random people? Uh-uh. Not the move. That's crazy. I cannot believe you did that. I was 16. I've only done this. It's honestly a miracle that you didn't get an STD. Who says I didn't? No, I didn't. I didn't.
No, but like that's how you get them. What's it like kissing 37 different people? Um, it's a disease that you can get from your mouth. Yeah, it's like a disease that you get from other people. Cold sores is an STD. I thought cold sores, but not from kissing people. I had cold sores because I was allergic to my braces. You did have those really bad. What? For a while. Cold sores? Yeah.
Yeah, that was like every other week. That was just part of it, man. Yeah. No, I was allergic to my braces, so I had cold sores, and people were like, what is up with you, Harper? And I was like, nothing. I got so sick one time after kissing Cash. I had to like... It was bad. Oh my gosh. I was like so sick. You were throwing up just at the side of him? Yeah. No, that was bad. She had to go to the doctor, didn't you? I had to go to the doctor and everything, and the doctor was like, have you been kissing anyone? And I was like, yes.
Wait, did you say yeah or no? Because your mom was there. I said yeah because I was scared. I was so sick.
I was like, I literally, I mean, I have to tell the doctor because like if I got something. I'd be like, no. No. No. One time a girl like lied about that to a doctor because her mom was in the room. Oh, yeah. And like she got very sick. Oh, yeah. See, I could have died if I would have told the truth. Here's my thing. I just don't, I don't think kisses count. What? Until the age of 18. What? No. If you're watching this and you're under 18, don't just be kissing people. Okay. I'm just not going to be kissing Airstream. My kisses don't count.
Yeah, they do, though. Yeah, they do, though. So, technically speaking. Harrison kisses every girl every day, so I'm not going to be kissing him. Are you dating him, though? No. He's, like, apparently back with his girlfriend. Wait, last time we talked to you, Harper. We were literally talking. No. What? We were literally talking. Harper is such a sad love story. I saw him in the hallway today. He was talking to her, and I was like...
Didn't you say that she grew 10 times uglier? Like, he literally said that. I will say that on this podcast. He told me. No, no, no, it's fine. It's fine. It's fine. And she got 10 times uglier. Stop talking. You're not going to say that. No, no, no, no. It's fine. We'll just bleep the one part she said. She said something nice. What'd you say? Yeah, she got 10 times prettier. Not 10 times uglier. You know who got 10 times uglier? You. You.
No, no, no, it's fine. We'll just bleep all that. All that is bleeped. Harper, you do realize, well, first of all, you have gone back and forth with this fine gentleman for quite some time. For nine months. Yep, and if he's saying stuff like that about other girls...
He's probably not saying nice things about you either. No, all my friends tell me that he only says good about me. Is that what they say? Yes, and his guy friends too. When are we getting him on the podcast? No, we're not. No, we're bringing Harrison on the podcast. No more clout for him.
out for him no i have a snapchat so i will invite him on the pod why why him and harper are beefing again they don't have to go by next by next shoot they won't be so i'll have him on without harper one episode and then what are y'all gonna do actually yeah replace harper with harrison
No, because, oh, God, he makes me so mad. And I had to leave him on open today. Why? I think that's a good episode. I don't. I think that's like. I want to hear his side of that Harper interrupting. I don't think. I don't know if he could genuinely have a conversation. I got an idea. Harper speaks very well. You know how rude he was today? He said. No, no. Oh, oh, oh. We're not reading his messages out loud. Bro, Harper be beefing with everybody. No. Harper, look at you.
You know what we should do? We should let Harper have a pod with three girls her age and just see the drama that comes from that thing. Bro, a lot of them. No, I know what we should do. Maverick sits in the middle of the couch and he does... I hold the microphone. He holds... And he does the dating between Harper and Harrison. We reverse the dating that you did with Maverick and the cheerleader. Should I call him right now and say, hey, want to be on the podcast?
Yeah, yeah, sure, why not? Go ahead and ask him. I will. Ask him, see what he says. While you're calling, who else have you kissed other than Cash? Yeah, for real. I'm doing it, guys. Um, I actually, nobody. Hey, I'm on the podcast. Um, do you want to be on the podcast? Right now? No, not right now. Like, like a few, in a few, like, I don't know, weeks. In the future? Yes. I mean, yeah, maybe. Wow. Like, I would go, yeah. Like, I would go, but like, uh, I mean, I guess. You guess? Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, I'll go. He's trying to play. He's trying to play. Cool. It's a one-to-one opportunity. Bro, tell Cash. Bro, Cash is actually making me mad. What? Why? I don't know. He just is. Oh. He's picking his hair right now. Poor boy. FaceTime. FaceTime. FaceTime? Okay. Okay. I'm FaceTiming you. That's crazy. Y'all are about to beef. We're filming the podcast. What?
Here, let me have a word with him. Hey, Harrison, it's Kate. Put it up to the mic. How are you? No. Oh, oh, name exposed. Your code name's not working anymore. It has been brought to my attention. Sorry, I have to hold you up to the mic. It has been brought to my attention. She's on FaceTime, right? Yeah. Who holds their FaceTime right in their face? I have to put the phone. Oh, wait. Oh, wait. There's the mic. Wait. Can the mic still hear me?
Holding it like a grandma. It has brought to my attention that there were some rude things done to Harper. What rude things? Oh, oh. Goodbye. Oh, no. Was I not supposed to say that? Oh, my gosh. No, it's okay. It's okay. The amount of anxiety he has right now. He needs to be humbled right now. He's typing. Wait, because why was he like...
I guess. Like, bro. Like, coming on our podcast would be such a burden. Yeah. That was the definition of playing it cool, man. He was trying to play it so cool. If you come on. Because he's not his kid. I mean, like. What rude things. Ha ha ha. I guess, like, sometime, like, maybe if my schedule's free. Like, bro. Like, it would be such charity work to come on our podcast. He's got to check with his publicist. Right. Yes, what happened to me? Oh.
What happened to you? Look how distorted his face is. Guess what happened to me? I have not told anyone about this and I have been very, very excited to tell someone. What? What? What is it? We were at the gym. Oh yeah. Y'all are not ready for this story, especially you. Move your hair from behind your ears. What happened? I'm dying to know. Okay, go on.
I was at the gym doing the leg press as one does. Did your legs get locked in? No. I'm terrified of that happening. Every time I'm doing the leg press thing, I'm like, dude, imagine my knees buckle and go the wrong way.
That would be horrible. So bad. I've seen a gymnast do that. Cash sends me videos like that like every other day. Guys, this gym pressing and it's cook up. Anyways, guys, I'm pushing. I'm maxing out on the leg press. I've done 400. I've done more. Listen. That's the max there is. I'm maxing out on my leg press, right? And I'm pushing and I'm like, and I rip one. Oh, God.
It was bad. And you're stuck there. Dude. Oh, no. So I push it up. You got to get the weight up. Otherwise it's going to crush you. No, no. So I push it up. Right? Because your spotter just left. He was gone. So you're left alone. No, no, no. I was by myself. And I push it up. And now I'm sitting there in the gym with ripped pants.
And I'm like, I thought you ripped like a. Yeah, that's what I mean. Oh, like I. Yeah, like I. Like I. Did you also rip your pants? My pants were blown. Oh. Oh. Yeah. And so I get up and I'm like, oh no. Wait, wait, wait. Huh? What? No, you did that to your pants? Oh, yeah. My mom always told me one day. No. She always told me one day. Oh. To wear underwear because one day I'll blow out my pants. Wait, you don't wear underwear? Luckily, I took her advice and I wore underwear.
And today was the day, well, a couple days ago, was the day I blew out my pants. Okay, you're saying blew out. Did you poop your pants or did you rip your pants? I pooed my pants. So you Hershey squirted them. I pooed them. And I get up like this and I'm clenching. He pooped his pants. You're sagging again.
Did it look like I was clenching? Yeah, it did. I clenched all the way to the bathroom. I've never clenched so hard in my life. You know what? When you're walking up the stairs and your friend tries to like... Oh, I hate this story so much. Poke your butthole. When your friend tries to like poke your butthole when you're walking up the stairs. And cheer when we did the mental splits, my friends would always stick their fingers up my butthole. Yeah, that happens. Yeah, it hurts. And then you like got a clench. That's...
That's what I was doing. I was clenching like that. You pooped your pants? Well, I wasn't like, I mean, yeah, I pooped them. But, and then I go to the bathroom and man, I was in there for about 15 minutes cleaning up. Dude, my, my, I had to throw my underwear away in the, uh, the, the, the trash can. Wait, they have that in men's bathrooms? Cause I thought it was only for girls. Well, no, most of the time they don't, but this is a, this is a co-ed one. Like it's a private bathroom.
No, she's talking about the little tin on the in women's bathrooms. They have the little tin on the stall for like tampons and stuff. Oh, no, I didn't throw it in that. We don't have those. Oh, yeah. He's talking about a trash can, Harper. Just a normal trash can? Yeah. Oh, so you thought that was co-ed? No girls have them? I did not know this. Y'all have trash cans on your walls? Yeah. Inside your stall? Look at my veins, bro. The more you know. Bro.
Wait, wait, wait. Back it up. You have a trash can on your wall? Yes. In the stalls, yeah. In each stall, each individual stall, there's usually like a trash can on the wall. It's not on the ground? No. That's wild. I always imagined it on the ground. No, zoom in on my veins. She's so proud of herself. What do you mean? Y'all never been in a women's bathroom before? Veins now. Mav's got some crazy veins. So, yeah. I blew up my pants. I cleaned up in the bathroom.
That's about the end of the story. And then I went back to leg pressing. Wow. Wait, you didn't go home? No, y'all were still working out. Wait, I was there? Yes, you were there. It was just a normal workout morning. And I was purposely, I came out and I was like, whew, that's bad. And I was like, I was like, but I can't tell anyone until the podcast. But I did tell Alex. Wait, what day was this? Like a week, like two weeks ago. Why would you keep that to yourself? That's just, that's crazy. It was hard to keep to myself, man. That was so funny.
It was very hard to keep to myself. Oh bro that that's did it smell? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, it's not but so do you still do the leg press? I still do the leg press. I haven't pooped in about five weeks. You know what's worse? Is you know how people wipe down the machine after they're done? I did not do that. I did not do that. Harper any more guys besides Harrison?
Oh my gosh, everyone wants to see Harrison. What's your love life? Is there a love life? Yeah. You don't need a love life. I do. No, you're too young for that. No. No, I'm literally a... No, trust him. He tried. And he went through so many girlfriends and it just failed and failed again and it failed again. I didn't even talk to a girl until I was like 16. And look where he's at now. He's 37 and single.
I still can't believe I believe that. Like, I literally thought he was 36. But I did talk to this one guy. I don't want to say his name because, like... Give him a code name. You gave Harrison a code name? Stop giving code names. She's not good at those, Kate. His name will be Matthew. Yeah. Well, there's a guy in my school named Matthew.
Okay. Jacob. There's a guy in my school named Jacob. Okay, what about like- There's no way I can get his name to this. All right. Ethan. Oh my gosh. There's five million guys named Ethan. Who the heck names their kid Ethan, bro? What?
What? Okay. I actually like that name. Ethan is such a popular name. Yeah. Fine. Nathaniel. Ain't nobody named Nathaniel. Oh, wait. No, I'm kidding. Oh, yeah. So Nathaniel. I went to school with two Nathaniels. Oh, my gosh. Well, so Nathaniel and me were talking. Actually, I'll make you say that. You don't want to be. Never mind. Oh. Well, actually, I'm going to name him...
Okay, we just move on with the story. What about like tree stump? Tree stump? Tree stump. Oh yeah, so tree stump. He'll be stump. Stump. Stump. Stumpy. Stump. Or how about Theodore?
Pick a name. I just want to move on with the story. This story's going to be like two seconds long. Okay, so Stump, we were talking and then I got the ick from him. He was like, ooh. Oh, I know what you mean. That's not what I meant. But me and my friends were talking. What the heck? Me and my friends were talking this weekend. I take it back. You do it like a pig. Me and my friends were talking. I never got the ick from you in case you were wondering.
Uh-huh. That's cat. You said you did. When? Last night. You said you could be icky when I do my walk. Okay, because y'all know. She said she could be icky when I do this. Oh. That is icky. That's pretty icky.
So that is an ick. I actually can't say that. My friend and I were talking about how we used to get the ick with guys before like getting the ick was a thing. Like, you know, like they're getting the ick, like saying ick was like came within the last like year and a half. Yeah. Anyways, why did you get the ick from him? Oh yeah. So I got the ick from him cause like he had really long nails. You did say that's one of your icks. Oh yeah. Nobody in here has long nails.
Like that's good. Oh, well, except for like girls, like having like long nails as girls is good. I asked my friend yesterday because I would like to... Guys, I took a... Sorry, I don't mean to... I'm not going to count. I got long nails. Yeah. Let me see. No, like his were like...
oh no yours aren't as long his were like oh that's weird as a guy yeah so first i said i said i stopped talking to him and then and then i started talking to him again because i was like oh well maybe i should just talk to him to have a hoko date and then like stop after and then that's so cruel and then and then so we talked again and then i stopped oh my gosh you couldn't make it to hoko
Did you call it off with him or did you just ghost him? Um, well, I told Sophie to tell him to like, be like, I was like, I was like, Sophie, just tell him I don't want to talk to him anymore. Aw, did he cry? Uh, no. He was like, he said, LOL, why? LOL, why? Yeah, I was like, uh,
Bro's heart was shattered. Yeah, he was thinking about us. I've been there. Why? Just kidding. You get it? What's like the shadiest thing you've ever done to like a guy you were talking to? Like, did you ever like ghost him completely or? So I don't really talk to any guys, but no, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. No, like I probably...
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Okay, so there's this kid. We're going to name him George. That was way quicker. Yeah, so we're going to name him. Because there's no Georges out there. Yeah, so we're going to, I saw George Washington, but so we're going to name him George. And he is this really, really small, small, very small. Okay. That's a lot coming from you. Very, no, no, no, like very small. Smaller than Stumpy? Yeah, he's Stumpy. Oh, Stump?
Oh, wait. So, so. No, stuff was actually like five seconds. Like it's a real person. That looks so disappointing. Oh, yeah. No, but what's it called? George. George. He was literally. Just break your chair.
I think I almost pulled the head off. Wow. Okay, so basically, yeah. So he's really short and he's so... The first time he asked me, I was in sixth grade and I was like, oh, so I have a boyfriend in Georgia. His name is Justin. And he was like, oh, Justin, the... Wait, I don't think I can say that. No, so like Justin, like the... Let's just say not very educated kid. Yeah. And he was like...
I'm not either. But so he was like, he was like, yeah. Oh, yeah. Justin, that not educated kid. And then I was like, I was like, oh, no, no, no, not him. The guy in Georgia. And he was like, oh, OK. So the next year he sung a song to me. He sung a song to me. That's so romantic. Does anybody know what's going on? No, I'm so caught up to speed.
No, literally. I know. She was like, and he was like, and she was like, and he was like. No, okay, okay. Let me keep saying. So the next year, he asked me out again, but he sang a song to me. And this song, he was like, we should have been so good together. And then the whole entire class. Oh, that was so sweet. And I got a video, and then we all had ISS for...
the next like a week of school because he's saying because we videoed what's iss where's it's like in school suspension it's where you like iss and then he gave you in a classroom and they don't let you go to your class and you don't go to lunch and you don't do anything you just sit in a classroom all day yeah because you got in trouble i would do iso out of school suspension oh that's like when you get kicked out of school that's ios that's my way more huh that's ios os
oh wait i did not mean to wait so after after y'all got iss what happened then he gave me a rose and i still have the rose in my closet and uh but like i don't like him it was just like funny i not funny it was nice and then then in eighth grade he still had a little bit of a crush on me so then he did a backflip um on the stage like show off oh my gosh was he like that is the thing to do