My Grillz Maker - Alligator Jesus
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For any drool you might have. Mm-hmm. Tosh Show. Tosh Show. Tosh Show for show. Hey, guys. It's Daniel Tosh, and welcome to another episode of Tosh Show, the most peaceful podcast out there. Can we get some light rain? Yeah, that sounds good. How about rain on a metal roof?

with an occasional thunder. This is peaceful. Can we add in some random animal noises? How about some ocean in the background? Oh, this episode is getting more and more zen by the second. How about some wind chimes? Can we add some wind chimes there too? Good, good. Just some soft piano in addition. It's a little overwhelming, I'm sure.

What else? What else would help this show? A big train. A train? Yeah. Ah, Eddie. So peaceful. How are you doing today, Eddie? I'm doing great. You getting excited for Fourth of July? Oh, you know it. Woo! Where are you taking the family this year, Griswold? Well, I think this year we're going to spend it at the beach near the house. Oh.

That's boring. The beach? Yeah. Now, I don't know if I need to tell people where Eddie lives, but he lives in South Bay here in Los Angeles. And when I talk about South Bay, I'm not talking about Palos Verdes or Torrance. I'm not even talking about El Segundo. I'm talking strictly Manhattan Beach and Hermosa Beach. I don't even care about Redondo Beach. Now,

On 4th of July, it's just nonsense. Girls from age 13 to 55 dressed like complete whores. And they walk up and down the Strand. And that's the sidewalk that runs on the beach. And then there's these million-dollar homes that are just one right after another. And they run between...

10 million to 25 million. That's about the price range of most of those strand homes. Now on 4th of July, for whatever reason, when I used to live in South Bay, you can just randomly go into people's houses that day. You just, every house is just opened up and, and debauchery is going on. It's just a party.

Just serving alcohol. And that's what I recall of 4th of July. So that's what you're going to do with your family, huh? I'm going to take them down to some of those big old houses and party. Mm-hmm. Well, that sounds nice. You grilling this weekend? I will be grilling, yeah. How often do you grill? I grilled last night. I grill like three times a week. You're a three-time-a-week griller. I'm a once-a-week griller. Mm-hmm. The other day, my wife made me grill. And I was, uh, she did all the prep work.

But then she hands me so many things, like it was eggplant, and she wanted this bread grilled, and there was shrimp, and there was chicken thighs. Every single thing she gave me had a different increment of time that it needed to be grilled. And then the sheer number, when you give me shrimp to grill and just give them loose, and then vegetables, and they're just loose, they're not on a skewer,

Now I'm, now I'm spending, I'm burning every hair on my hand just in there way too long. It's like, oh, it just needs two minutes each side. Oh, great. There's 300 of them. Right. I mean, if you're looking, you ain't cooking. I know that. I find it painful. It was just a lot of grilling, a lot of flipping. I was, I was annoyed. And then, then she's like, oh, well, you know what? You could have done the eggplant a little longer.

Nobody wants to eat that shit anyway. Tastes like mush. Are you a gas grill guy? Yep, got a Weber. You got a Weber? Got a Blackstone to also flat top. I'm pretty sure I have a Viking. You have a Wolf. I have a Wolf? I have a Wolf. That's good. I don't even know. It's a Wolf. It's got red knobs. I love it. She works right away.

I've never used the rotisserie thing in it. And it's got a sear thing. I've never used the sear thing either. There's a lot it does that I don't use. There's lights inside of it. Don't use those either. I'm always shocked that they work. Seems like that'd be too hot for lights. I really just set it to medium high for anything, no matter what I'm cooking.

Sometimes when I do chicken wings, I do the high heat on one section and then just set them on the other side where there's no heat and just, you know, it takes 30, 45 minutes. That's as fancy as I get.

Oh, you know, I also do something with a baked potato that I think is pretty good. You take a baked potato. This is how I grill my baked potatoes. And I take a fork and I stab it a million times all around. And that's dangerous because a potato is dense. And then I smother it.

with olive oil, tons and tons of olive oil. And then I double or triple wrap it in aluminum foil and I grill it for about an hour, hour 15. Uh, and basically, uh, if, if done right, it comes out like a twice baked potato. It's almost like mashed potatoes when you open it up. Uh, that's fun.

Well, all this grill talk is misleading because today's episode is about grills.

Enjoy.

We'll be right back.

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My guest today believes that the key to a beautiful smile is to have the words baller written in diamonds on your teeth. He's the grill maker to the stars. Please welcome Alligator Jesus. Thank you. Do you want me to call you Alligator Jesus at all time? I mean, that's what my mom calls me, so. She calls you Alligator Jesus, never even shortens it? She shortens it to Gator. Oh.

There. Just a gator? Yeah. But who gave you the name Alligator Jesus? Not me. It was everybody that was teasing me. So if you see that line right there, there's a little scar. I still have a pin in my wrist from wrestling an alligator when I was younger. I used to.

I used to catch alligators and mess with them too. Yeah. I mean, you know, it's molesting. It's like a restable offense in Florida. Not when I was doing it. When I was doing it, we were like yanking them out of ponds off the golf course. Yeah, yeah. And like throwing them in the river and the country club guy would give us 50 bucks for getting rid of them. Exactly. You know, it's like a thing that in Florida, it's very normal. Us Florida guys, we know, yeah, yeah, Florida, you know, whatever. But I went with

Native Americans. I went with Miccosukee Indians on an airboat and we sought out a very gargantuan, big ass alligator. And the guy jumped into the water and hugged the thing and taped up its mouth so I could do a photo op thing. And-

They were pretty rude to the gator. They were kicking it and they were really freaking mean to it. And I just had had enough and I wanted to let it go. But they were like, all right, you let it go because they weren't going to – Untape it? Untape it. And I'm like, well, it will starve. Yeah.

Yeah, so what? Was there a response? I'm like, nah, I'm going to let it go. All right, go for it. And it broke my wrist in the process of trying to let it go. I mean, it's a pissed off, like, big-ass gator. I don't know how big of a gator you've ever— No, no, the ones I messed with were in the three to six foot max. Nah, this was like over 12 feet. This is a big-ass gator. This is a big boy. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And yeah, it, it, it, you know, holding onto it, it broke my wrist and this thing swelled up. I was 23 because under 25, I still had my mother's health insurance. Okay. So that's where alligator Jesus came from there. Cause you should be dead. They, they made fun of me cause I was trying to save the gator, like some sort of alligator Jesus. And it was just a douche. Makes sense.

I like it. No, I'm happy with it. Born in Miami? Born and raised in Miami. Are you Cuban? Yeah. 100%? 100%. Mom born in Havana. My dad on a technicality born in New York, but Cuban. And yeah, we're raised in Miami, my three brothers and I. Miami's very different now. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Cool.

crazy different. I lived there in the mid-late 90s. Oh, cool. So you saw it. Art Basel came in the early 2000s, like 2001 or 2002, and that really did a big

of the ecosystem down there because, of course, that brought all the attention and the money and the people to invest in South Florida because now all of a sudden everybody from around the world saw the economic possibilities of South Florida as they did time and time again in history of it. Everyone would just come in from somewhere else, see the magic of that South Florida economy

and say, I can do something and build something from here. And all the ass. Oh, man, of course. Yeah. Did you, were you a Canes fan? Yeah, definitely. Are you still a Canes fan? I mean, I don't follow any sports ball these days. Athletes will hit me up and be like, oh, do you watch our games? I'm like, not really. Oh, you,

You don't care at all about sports. No. I like it. Now, you went to FIU. Yes. You're the only person I know that went to FIU. Really? In the history of the world. I mean, there's a lot of artists and people coming out of FIU that are making some notable changes in the world. That's pretty cool. Did you ever want to go to UF?

Never. Me neither. No. It wasn't my steez. My wife, her whole family, all gators. Oh, my gosh. They do that whole thing with their hand and everything? Oh, yeah. They do the chomps. Yeah. I guess it's better than the other racist hand. Yeah, the Seminoles definitely, I mean, hopefully they cut that out. Now, you studied...

At FIU. Yeah. Jewelry design? Yeah, I did. Well, they had a small metals metalsmithing program. Okay. And I got into that because I had to get out of photography, which was my main thing, because of an allergy to the chemistry. By the time I was turning 18, I started to notice these, like, rashes on my hands. And by the time I turned 20, my hands would just literally go like this. And I'd have to go outside, get fresh air, run my hands under cold water to, like, get dexterity back in my fingertips because the—

saturation to all that chemistry was really messing me up. So let's talk about your ride. When did you move from Miami to Los Angeles? It was 2011. I started coming out here and then 2012, January 4th, 2012 was the day I moved here officially and landed in Culver City and said, this is where I'm going to

going to live. When did you get to jewelry? Because you didn't immediately. Once I moved here, I was in the art world and the jewelry was my hobby. And who shoved you in the right direction? Murakami, Takashi Murakami. He's the one who, I came out here working with him. And it was like, he had already seen your jewelry before. You know, it's a funny story. It's all as a curator and art director at a museum on a lunch break.

And I'm walking down South Beach on Washington Boulevard. There's a pawn shop next to a nightclub, as there is. And I looked and I did a double take. I'm like, that's a fucking Murakami in the window there. Yeah.

there and it was a gold sunflower eyes like the sunflower with a smiley face okay inside of a skull that was completely covered in diamonds and it was a ring but it was blatantly a takashi murakami artwork i recognized it and i went into the pawn shop asked him if i could see it and the guy was kind of like ah this fucking thing you know i've had it in my window in the store in miami downtown and no one's looked at it for two and a half years here you go you want it six thousand dollars i was like

Are you kidding me? We just sold Murakami prints for like 20 grand at the gallery that I was working with in LA. Were you, were you questioning, were you positive you knew what you were doing there? It was signed on the inside. It had like the monogram. It had a serial number. It had the carat weight. This was as legit as it could be. So, you know, I put a deposit down 600 bucks. It's like all my money at the time. And I went upstairs and called Kai Kai Kiki, his organization in Long Island city.

And they were very dismissive of me, and they're like, you know, why are you calling us about this thing? Uh-huh. But then, yeah, a Miami Beach detective was at my door the next day asking questions about me. So we went over to the pawn shop, and it turned out the thing had been stolen from Murakami years before at Art Basel. Uh-huh. Okay.

And it was like a story that Murakami and his people really wanted just to go away. They didn't want this thing to resurface. Okay. Whatever. I guess insurance had been paid out. So then this thing kind of popping up again was a problem for them. I did get it. Was it dangerous? Were you ever in danger? No, but I did go to Kaikai Kiki and they were very much like, oh, thank you for coming. Please leave. They were like-

Not wanting to address this situation. Did you get paid out at all? No. I did not get paid out, but it did open a lot of doors. Like, you know, doors opening. Okay. That's pretty cool. Murakami blew the doors off the hinges for me. Okay. Murakami and this whole situation got the attention because it was international art news of a collector out here, galleries out here, museums out here. An institution started to take notice of this kid who –

Did something great. Murakami publicly called me at an event. Ah, this is David Tamago, most honest man in America. And like called everyone to stand up and give me a round of applause. You say, listen, I was trying to buy it to sell that shit. Yeah, absolutely. What would it have been worth? You know, over seven figures or something now, but six figures back then. I love it.

I love it. Art world is whatever you can get. I know. So seven is what I'm holding on to. It's really up there. And to get back to your question about when I started really being Alligator Jesus, 2017, Gagosian Gallery, I think it was his show in March, maybe in 2018, but I'd already been doing my jewelry more and more. Murakami had his big solo show. They always do around the Oscars at Gagosian. Okay.

And Murakami sees me and he just beelined it for me, grabbed me out of the crowd. And he's like, oh, David, how are you, Mr. Tamago-san? Blah, blah, blah. So good to see you. Glad, glad, thank you. You're here. And I'm like, mind you, this has been years. I haven't seen him. Don't do an impression. And he, yeah, he pulls me over and introduces me and says, oh, Pharrell, Ben Baller, this is David Tamago, best jeweler in America. And I'm like, what? There we go. That's Ben Baller. And-

He's like, yeah, your Godzilla ring was amazing, this and that. I'd shown him a piece back in 2013 that I made in 2010. So I'd been doing jewelry all the time. And he was telling me all those times, stop curating. Stop working in art. Don't work in film. Do your jewelry. That's what you're really passionate about. That's what you're great at. Because you did do everything out here in LA. Yeah. You were wanting to do film, all of it. People like me, we are just resourceful. That Miami hustle, we're like,

Always figuring out how to get things done. I mean, you're... Let's be clear. You're not to knock...

The wonderful people of Miami, your hustle is not necessarily. Some people in Miami, a little less hustle. Yeah. There's some people that I kind of would like to push a little harder. There's definitely a thing called Cuban time. I'm well aware of Cuban. I've lived on Cuban time. I've been to a Miami Heat game where there's no one at the basketball game until the middle of the second quarter. Do you believe in ghosts?

Absolutely. Oh, interesting. Alligator Jesus believes in ghosts. You know, I went to the Quad Cities and I had like close encounters with ghosts and stuff. And if it weren't for like those kind of situations I was put in, they're like, I'm a scientific brain kind of guy.

I can't explain those things. Is it drug related at all? Not at all. I'm sober as hell. You know, I've never been a drug user. Not even casually. What about hallucinogenics? Natural? Like a mushroom or something like that. Microdosing is very common right now. But like I was at Burning Man a couple of years ago and I wanted to do a 0.5 gram and somebody's like, oh, here, take this chocolate. It's half a gram.

I eat it. You can't trust their math. And then of course it's, oh, my bad. That's five grams. And you know, I was-

floating. That was the harshest, craziest drug trip I've ever had. And is that the story where you ended up having to take off? Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That is that story. You heard that? All right. Just go on. Who calls that needs an emergency grill while you're on five grams of mushroom? She's the only one in the world that I would say I would allow to have a grills emergency and it's Madonna.

Okay. And she needed me in New York, like tomorrow. So then that's a situation where like, I say, I just laugh because I'm at the center of Burning Man itself. I'm at the man. When I got the wild service, it just came into my phone. I'm like, am I hallucinating this? Her executive assistant says, Madonna needs me in New York tomorrow.

Well, you can have me if you get me from here. And I just took a selfie at the man and she figured it out. You know, so you took a private jet to New York, a helicopter. Well, yeah, it was all that shit. Like, you know, Burning Man has everything you need. If you need it, it's there. And, you know, if you need to get off the playa, there's a helicopter. They'll take you to Reno, Reno. You can catch a PJ from there. I went to LA, grabbed my tools.

Got a red eye to New York. That was the most efficient thing. Am I supposed to say PJ? I mean, that's— God damn it. That sounds better. That sounds better. You get to a level and you just start taking more comfortable means of travel. Uh-huh. I just like the term PJ. I just never said PJ. Yeah.

Pete, start saying PJ. Well, you call it soda, not pop, right? You grew up in the South. I think I call it soda. Yeah. I mean, it just depends on where you grew up. Where you grew up, if you call a private jet a PJ or not. Yeah. All right. If you grew up with it.

I did not grow up with it. Was grills always going to be a specialty or no? Not at all. It was definitely not something I was interested in doing because I had made grills in Miami, but grills back then were very much street culture. And street culture doesn't pay the bills. Does not. And those kind of clientele, definitely they bring things from the street, that attitude, that swagger, and then that aggressiveness and threatening attitude when it comes down to pay.

That's always fun. And there's a very competitive nature in Miami for grills. Like people are always saying, I can do it cheaper. But like that cheaper person, they're either cheating the carrot, which is like if you're paying for 14-carat, they're giving you like 11-carat or 12-carat. Okay. And they're putting more alloy. So you're not getting exactly what you're paying for. Yeah, of course you're getting it cheaper. They're not honest businessmen like me.

Everything that I do, I can put my name on it because I'm casting it myself. I put the actual diamonds. But I hear about New York jewelers and other places where these big rappers – in fact, there's a very famous rapper here who his entourage gave me a broken piece of jewelry to assay, which is melt down the gold, extract the diamonds, and they wanted to make something else with it. And they had paid –

A substantial amount of money, six figures for this necklace, and it was in pieces. And it turns out once we assayed it, it was like nine carats, not 14. And the diamonds, I actually gave him the diamonds to look at the diamonds, and he was like, nah, these are VVSs, which stands for very, very slight inclusions, which you should not have any perceptible things inside the diamond and imperfections in it.

And I gave him one of the diamonds to look at with a loop. And he's like, well, it's all that stuff inside the diamond. And I'm like, those are inclusions. These are I. These are included diamonds. These are trash. Like...

famous jeweler that he spent all this money getting this jewelry piece from. May accuse you of lying or no? No, because I literally made sure that he was with me throughout the process. I like to. Right. You have to almost do that now. You can't like take stuff away from people. No, no, no. There's a lot of stuff like that. You hear about like, oh, if you take something to get resized, make sure they do it in front of you and stuff. But I don't, I never do it. My wife's ring. I'm always like, just go clean it. Yeah.

What are you going to do? Are you going to swap it? But yeah, I mean, that's a definite thing in jewelry. So grills weren't really my thing because the clientele are very thuggish back in Miami. And it wasn't until I got here in LA. Or we have a classier thug? No.

No, I was very ingrained in the rave community and the after hours. Did you go to raves? Yeah. But you were never like into ecstasy or anything like that? I was always known as like, oh, alligator's there, but he's partying drug-free. And people would always say, I don't know how you do it. And they're like, jaw jacking from cocaine and whatever else they're doing. I have never done cocaine in my life, ever. That's all going to change right now. Yeah.

I've seen how it destroys people's lives. All right. So you're clean, you're straight, but the rave world was what kind of... Absolutely. And that community, that plur, peace, love, unity, and respect, that principle in the rave community is definitely...

a really cool concept in any community. It mirrors that of the Juggalo community, which is what I really came from. That's what I forgot all about. How could you forget? One of the first things you did was you, did you create their website? What did you do? Well, I was making websites. For Insane Clown Posse. Yes. For people that don't know what a Juggalo is. Whoop, whoop. Uh-huh.

A juggalo is a fan of and a loyal part of the community. Did they pay you in Faygo? They paid me in something better. Oh, good. Clout. Let's get back to, I want to get to grills again because the pandemic, oddly enough, made your business skyrocket. Yeah.

Did you see that article Flop Magazine wrote about me? No. It was called The Pandemic Hustle. And they documented how I sat on my hands for about two weeks and then I was like, I can't handle not doing anything. I watched Tiger King and I'm like, that's it? I got to get up.

Out of the house and do something with myself. So I decided to finish up all the orders that I had pending. And I started a drive-up service where people would drive up to my house. They'd crack their window open. And I would be in full PPE, gloves. I had extended gloves. I had—

A painting suit, mask, all the nine. And I would take their impression through the cracked car window. Okay. And then take that impression, drop it into a bag of bleach and tell them, drive off, Venmo me, and I'll make your grills and you can come and pick it up the same way in a week. Okay. And of course, EDD money started to kick in and people started to get all those paychecks coming in for unemployment. Uh-huh.

That's so many people going to your house. They couldn't stop themselves. When did you decide, hey, this is too much. I got to get this out of my house. So I was making the – I do everything in downtown in the jewelry district. Right. That's where I produce it and fabricate and everything. And I was so busy making stuff that I could stop – I had to stop doing it at the house. So I had people just driving up to me in downtown. Uh-huh.

And it was when someone tried to mug me and literally, I don't know if they're trying to mug me or it was just a crazed guy with a knife walking up to me while I was making an impression with someone from, from a car. Someone screamed alligator, look out. And there was a guy, maybe three steps behind me, come creeping up behind me with a knife. And, you know, I just ducked and ran and the guys ran after him, but he was coming at me.

probably to rob me. And I was like, holy shit. Did you have anything on you at the time? I had jewelry on me. I just come downstairs and I had my backpack with me. And this is like around the times of the riots. So, you know, there's an air of like rebellion in LA and people in the, in the downtown district, especially the jewelry district, people are, are known to not flaunt anything that they know. The richest person down there is walking around with just a, a,

A paper bag. A paper bag and a black t-shirt, no chain on. You turn around and you see somebody with a knife. You're like, oh shit, I got to get off the street. I'm no longer street level. That same day, I got a little studio. It was probably about twice the size of this little space here. You don't have to brag. It was bigger than this. No, but it was very small. It was just like a small space during COVID. I didn't need a big operation. And I was just like, I got to get off the street. Were you by yourself?

Yeah. Where are you at now with people that are helping you? I've got my one production manager and he, he runs point. He thinks, takes things from point A to B. Like I'll do the wax up. It goes to casting. Casting is a, a totally separate operation because,

My friend's company, they're efficient. If I get it to them by 2 p.m., it's ready the next day. They have options that if I get it to them by 1 p.m., it can be ready at 7 p.m. Back then, you were making a grill. You'd make an impression. You'd make the grill, and they'd get it the next week. And that's a very fast turnaround compared to normal grills that people get custom-made take—

Three months. Three months. And now where are you at? Same day. Same day. Yeah. We're operating, like, we'll charge you a little bit more because it is a stress. You know, we've got to like, everything has to flow flawlessly and accurately. I can't even get same day dry cleaning. Is wearing a grill bad for your teeth? No, not at all. I mean, you got to- Do dentists recommend it? If people wear retainers, the same problems with retainers, you got to clean it every day.

If you drink something, you got to rinse it out. Do you sleep in it? No. Do you wear a grill every day of your life when you're working or no? Yeah. This is my everyday look. Like I didn't get dressed up for this or anything. I'm just like going to cruise through the day looking like this. What about going through TSA? It's a pain in the ass because the dental alginate is like a powder. So they always want to test it. But lately, because I travel so much and I keep going to a lot of the same cities, the TSA know who I am.

So it's pretty cool now. Like I get spotted or, you know, when I started working with Madonna going through TSA in New York, oh, you're Madonna's jeweler. So that's really cool. I get spotted with that because she was on the Fallon show just like talking about her grills. I mean, yeah. I don't know. She's –

I don't know what's going on with her. Madonna's awesome, man. I mean, yes, the concept. No, she's got four decades of being a real pop icon.

I mean, there's very few pop stars that are like Madonna level, Michael Jackson level. Like, and she, Michael Jackson. Now we got a Taylor Swift, Beyonce even. Is Taylor going to ever rock a grill? You know, I see her people watching my stories. It's never the actual artists that reaches out first. It's always the people in the peripheral. When they're that big, do they want shit for free? There are people like that, but...

What's a bottom-end grill cost and what's the Cadillac of all grills cost? What's my range? I just made a grill. We finished it last week. It was $225,000. Is that both top and bottom? Yeah. Is it always top and bottom? That's what...

looks best. Like, like having that symmetry is always something. And if you get like a single tooth over here, you should get another tooth over here because your bite, imagine you do have a layer of metal over the tooth. So if your bite, I'm always about making sure that your bite is comfortable.

I don't want your jaw to be like all weird. So you have the grill makers that you look like robot teeth because they're all very straight. You see that as well with like veneers when they're done poorly. They just look like chiclets. Bad veneers. It's hard to look at people. It's hard to look at them and same with the bad grills. So I'm always about following your natural. You scratching the inside of your lips with them? No, no. Never. There are certain textures that people want like diamond dust because it's very low cost.

sparkly finish, but it feels like sandpaper. We don't do that because we tell people it cuts your lip up. What percentage, ballpark it for me, your clientele is white getting grills? Of Caucasian people? Mm-hmm.

Maybe 50%. 50% Caucasian grills. Yeah. It's becoming more mainstream? Yeah. I consider white mainstream. We did do this number. We looked at all of our orders from 2023, and we realized that on average, our customers are women over 35.

That's the average. Yeah. Huh. What about jacked up teeth? Do you ever go like, oh, we can't deal with this? I had someone recently came in and he wanted a top six, but he only had three teeth that they could hang on to. So I was then making an additional three teeth that were false.

And that's something that we can easily do for people, which is a great feeling when people are telling me like, yeah, I never smile anymore because I'm missing some teeth for whatever reason. People can miss teeth for any number of things. I've got two implants in the back. And I'm sure it took like a couple months for the,

The implant, the heel, this and that. Yeah, they have the stupid bolt in your mouth. Absolutely. It's awful. So imagine in the interim, we offer this for people because it's affordable enough, like $200 a tooth in gold. You can have this bridge in gold that makes it look like you're not missing anything. Can you eat with grills in your mouth? I don't recommend it. You could.

I mean, it's easier when you have a full grill than if you have just a couple cap here and there. And if you have any fangs, like that makes it a little difficult. You like doing the fangs? It's the most popular thing for sure for us because a lot of people in the subculture communities and the nightlife, they like that darkness to it. You know, vampires are always popular. What percentage of your business is grills versus other jewelry? I'd say 50%.

Because we're doing a lot more like engagement rings and big chains and a lot of like custom jewelry for people these days. Fake diamonds versus real diamonds or whatever versus created. I'll say this. LeBron James has publicly said he wears CZ.

Everything that he wears, all that jewelry is cubic zirconia, which is like very much worthless. It's like 10 cents for thousands of stones. But the work to... The craftsmanship, the workmanship and everything isn't free there. He's paying all in the labor. It doesn't matter whether you're putting diamonds, lab diamonds or natural diamonds. Lab diamonds. That's the word I was looking for. Lab diamonds are...

Still very expensive still. No, not- They're not pennies. Not pennies for sure. But there's different qualities and different grades of lab diamonds. You can get moissanite, which is on the lower spectrum. Then there's two different kinds of lab diamonds that are named after the process of how they're made. And then there's natural diamonds.

And that's where you get to the conflict diamonds? Well, I mean, you don't find that anymore. No? No one's. I mean, unless you're— I don't know. I mean, are you buying jewelry from a back alley? I have no idea. But, I mean, there's got to be—there's only so many diamonds in the world, right? What happens these days, people have mixed parcels where, like, if you're buying in bulk, like, 10,000 one-millimeter stones, which, like, in my grills, I have, like, little tiny one-millimeter diamonds, right? Okay. They're all around the opals.

If you're buying 10,000 and it's $1,000 per 1,000 of them, so it's $10,000 for this bag. And the person I'm buying from, if it's not some valued, trusted person with a great reputation, and I'm trying to just find the cheapest deal out there, I'm probably going to find somebody who's going to sell it to me for $7,000 or $6,000. And what they've done is they've taken out

4,000 of the natural diamonds or just 50% is natural and then 50% is lab diamond and they've kind of mixed parcels because to the naked eye, unless you're starting to put those diamonds into a spectrometer to read the light passing through it and everything and that's,

That's a whole process all in itself. It can't be checked once it's in the jewelry. It's just like a drug dealer. Yeah. He's giving us dirty drugs. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's like cocaine, I guess, if you cut it with stuff that looks a similar way. Yeah. You see that in the movies where they're in labs cutting stuff. Well, I've seen it in person. Yeah.

I mean, are you doing mostly lab diamonds or? I always tell everybody, tell me your budget. I don't have any prices. Tell me your budget and then we'll design something toward your budget. Because some people, they only have 500 bucks. And then especially, I guess what has made me most popular with artistic clients and artists that are producing content and producing like either, even if it's TikTok,

or if it's artists that are making music videos and album covers and performing and everything, I want them to not feel like, oh man, I can't afford that Johnny Dang $200,000 chain. What they don't know is like, all right, that Johnny Dang $200,000 chain,

$100,000 goes to Johnny Dang. That leaves $100,000 for the materials and the labor costs. Well, he's getting that made very cheaply with either his in-house labor or overseas with even cheaper labor. So that might be a $50,000 materials and labor chain. $150,000 of that thing is like— You've got to cut that middleman out. You've got to cut that middleman out. Or I just tell them, like, you know, you could get a $50,000 chain, which—

very easily attainable from someone like me and you know if it's if you don't have the $200,000 and the Johnny Dang stamp of like I got it from Johnny Dang which says a lot in the community of rap but you want to have that look you can get one made in silver with CZ they

That looks just as good. And mind you, if people like the Kardashians are no longer really wearing fancy jewelry because of what happened to Kim in Paris where they broke in and were robbing her of all of her jewelry, celebrities are more and more switching to lab diamonds or even jewelry.

silver and cz you're still gonna get robbed whether they tell you it's fake or not you just got that part i love bad baby where she was on record saying i can't wait for the day someone tries to steal something from me i'm just gonna give it to them let the stupid asses like take it and it's not worth anything chad johnson a pro football player ocho cinco he was he always bragged about never buying real diamonds it's you can spend your money on better investments than that

I mean, the only thing that has a resale value is the natural diamonds. The labs don't, no one wants to pay. Oh, they don't, they don't resell. Interesting. Your company, your office space, what kind of insurance do you have to pay? I'm getting even new insurance now because it's like, is it crazy? No, it's not. It's not horrible. I mean, what's the most diamonds you've ever had in your, we don't keep a lot of inventory if any in the studio. What about you? You ever let people borrow jewelry? Yeah. Um, I've,

You know, it goes over my head, but a friend of mine came over and yesterday was like, hey, so-and-so rapper and so-and-so rapper. And I'm like, oh, this rapper from Wu-Tang and that one needs some change here. Just take this. They're brass and glass. Uh-huh. But, you know, Bad Bunny, Megan Thee Stallion, Lil Nas X, all these people, they're not –

always buying this stuff. They're renting it or they're borrowing it from jewelers. And there's plenty of stuff being rented from Beverly Hills, but you know, you'll see the same design over and over and over again. When we make low cost rentable stuff, it has really cool design involved in it and it looks good. And it makes the artist feel like, Oh, I'm getting something unique because it came from alligator Jesus. Yeah.

And they know that if it's something that's really unique and really custom, I'm not just going to loan it out to a bunch of people. I don't want iSpice to borrow the same chain that Doja Cat wore. Those two women should have their own identity and they shouldn't be wearing the same thing publicly. Yeah.

Do you think you'd ever become mainstream enough that you would have your own line that like at Christmas, like the Zales, the big alligator Jesus's new blank forever pennant grill necklace at Zales. Every kiss begins with alligator Jesus grills at K. These are things that do you strive for that type of mainstream success? Nah. No. Nah, if it's not fun, I'm not going to do it. And I love...

Look, we're here for a very short time and I want it to be- Well, you, because you're on the street with diamonds. Yeah. People are coming at you with fucking knives. Yeah. I want to have fun doing this. And sure, maybe I don't have kids, but I'll leave like a legacy to my kids and who cares after I'm gone what they do with my legacy. With your legacy. Yeah. I at least had fun doing it. But it's very much all about me interacting with people and I still love-

making art alligator the alligator has in your logos two heads where'd you come up what's the significance behind that there are decisions in your life every day that we make that could lead you in one direction or another and the having the two heads about it it's like at least the acknowledgement or the awareness of that every decision you make in your life could lead you down a path okay anybody that's on my show um i always give them something from my house uh that's

that I don't want anymore. This, I'm giving you this, uh, from my house, but I, it's not that I don't want it anymore. My, uh, my wife's aunt, um, uh, Travis Blanton. She, uh, she is an artist in Vero beach. Oh, cool. Does ceramics. So you guys give him a wine stopper. That is fresh as hell. You know, I should have named my company million dollars and people would give me a million dollars. Yeah, no, I'm giving you an alligator stopper instead. I like this. So now she has to send me another one.

How big is your community? How many people are actually making grills for this specific clientele? It's worldwide. No, I understood. But I mean, but is there hundreds of jewelers or is there less? There's about a hundred of us out there. At the top? At the top, yeah. It's not competitive? There's definitely people that feel like it's competitive and don't.

And they're lost because I make a much better friend than a competitor because, I mean, first of all, you're only competing with yourself in what you do. Clit rings. You ever make one of those? We have.

Do I need to get an impression or can you just ballpark it? Speaking of impressions, I brought everything to make your dental impressions. Oh, God. But is this the same type of impression that you do at the dentist when you're like get fitted? Because those things make me gag. You've only done it in the U.S.?

Because I don't use the U.S. stuff. In fact, the U.S. stuff is not even legal in the EU because of all the chemicals and weird shit. Will it pull out a filling by chance? No, not this stuff. Okay. So I import my dental alginate from Denmark. It's color changing, so it's not like in your mouth for like 20 minutes or whatever. How long is it in my mouth for? 30 seconds to 45 seconds. Okay. It's really quick. And it's the most accurate impression. I'm paying for my grill. No, you're not.

you're not. Yeah, I am. I support the artist. All right. That's cool. As long as it's cheap. It can be whatever you want. I have to tell you my budget, my budget for my grill. What's that? 300,000. 300,000 is my budget? He'd break a, you know, it's wild because there's some jewelers that like throw these weird numbers out there. I'm like, how the hell do you get that number? And I told you before about the Johnny Dang where it's like,

100,000 goes to the artist. Like, you know, I just did a project for Adidas and my take home. Did you really? That's awesome. Congratulations. Thank you. And it was like a quarter million project and like, you know, oh shit, I shouldn't say this, but like, you know, my take home. I like telling people what things cost. I just put,

all the money into making the thing. You took it all. I put everything into it. I was just like, I'd rather this thing to be like really cool and awesome and give this as a gift to the city of LA for people to see this thing. And you know, whatever, it's Adidas. Like my name attached to Adidas is a cool thing. It's a big deal. It's a big deal. And that'll, that'll turn into things later. Or maybe I'll do a partnership with them later, but it's just for me more important to make the art. Oh no. Yeah.

This would be the best way in the world to like have me killed. Yeah.

You're like, oh, yeah, just put this in your mouth. And then all of a sudden, it's just done. Foaming mouth and it's just like, oh. You can't travel with that, though, can you? Yeah, I do. That's the stuff, though, that they are like, what the fuck? Yeah, it's inert. It's inert. I mean, people travel with protein powder, too. Right, but anytime you have your own cans that don't have labels on it, that sends off some flags over there at TSA. Do I need to sign my name to this?

So that you remember whose mouth it is? You know, I have an order for him. I'll fill out it. Oh, God damn it. You got an order for him. Look at this thing. This thing is official as fuck. How many grills a day are you doing now? At least five. Every day of your life. Yeah. In somebody's mouth.

You know, my assistant is doing impressions for me now because like right now while I'm here, we had some appointments, you know, we changed the time. So I had some appointments I had already arranged. So I was like, oh, whatever, still come. My assistant's able to get the... Look at all these up charges. It looks like you're getting your tires rotated. Yeah.

Cut outs? Do I want any fangs? No, I do not want fangs. I'm just going to let you go willy-nilly and do whatever you want. Would you like a top or a bottom grill? I think a top. Top. Couple teeth. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I gag just if I hold a pen in my mouth. You'll be fine. So pull your lip. Say ah. Ah. That's it. Bite down? No need to bite down. Oh.

You see how it's pink? It's color changing so as soon as it's as white as the spatula, it'll be ready. For any drool you might have. This is great. The only thing that slows it down is if it's too cold and it is so freaking cold in here. But yeah, you're about done. Say ah. Ah.

It wasn't so bad. No, it wasn't. You know, there's a dentist here in LA, Connelly, Thomas Connelly. Okay. And he's in Beverly Hills. And he does the, he's an actual dentist, so he'll remove teeth and put like new teeth. He did Post Malone's where he has magnets implanted into the platinum teeth so that the grills will magnetically hold on. Oh, interesting. So that's really cool.

He started with the baby where he put magnets in the back teeth so the grills just go thunk and hold on. They don't cause any tension on the parents. If one post gets older and if his kid does good in school, he could take his report card and stick it to his mouth. He could do that now, man. Posty, I'm looking forward to seeing him at the Gov Ball. The Gov Ball? Yeah. Good. Alligator Jesus, you're just –

You're doing all the cool shit. Yeah. You hang out with all the cool people. I appreciate you being on the show, and thank you for making my first and last grill. I got your impressions whenever you need another one. Oh, right. So I went through that one time. That's it. That's great.

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Plus, at these prices, you're burning rubber, not cash. And with eBay Guaranteed Fit, your part is guaranteed to fit your ride every time or your money back. Keep your ride or die alive at ebaymotors.com. Eligible items only. Exclusions apply. I want to thank Alligator Jesus for hooking me up. I look different, right? You like that? My first grill.

What do you think? You look different. Got yourself a little top pony. Little man bun. Looking all Jason Momoa up in this motherfucker. Yeah. Look at us. All of a sudden, I got a little more street cred. Killing it, man. Killing it. Hey, should I tell them what happened the other day? Guys.

Another great story. Carl, you want to hear it or no? We do it? Let's do it. My son had a friend over. They were playing in the pool. I was swimming with them. They were both physically attacking me. Then my wife's like, ah, your daughter wants to get in. So, you know, when you're fighting off two five-year-olds in a pool, it's nothing better than having to hold a one-year-old the whole time. So that's what I'm doing. Anyway, that part of the story doesn't matter. Then we take...

My one-year-old is done. She wants out. Take her out. Take her swim diaper off. She's walking around. My wife's going to get a diaper. And then she poops right in the living room.

The doors are opened up to the pool area. She poops in the living room on the rug. And they're like two very dark, very dry. She's not getting enough water, I guess. Round. They come out really round. Like just slightly smaller than a baseball, bigger than a golf ball. Okay, there's two of them. Boom, boom. Going to be a very easy pick up and clean. My wife...

Immediately steps in one. Barefoot steps in it. Goes between her toes. She starts freaking out. Then she's like walking on her heel to go get something to pick it up. I go, don't go pick it up. Go clean your foot off. Clean your foot off first. Then we'll pick up these two balls. All right. Well, then she goes and cleans her foot. Then she comes back and she goes, guys, bad news. There's only one left. Yeah. You got anything to say for yourself? You ate another nugget. Yeah.

Just coprophagia at it. Just boom, gone. Just ran in, said, oh, here's a unattended turd. I'll take that. Why'd you eat it? I had to brush your teeth. Meanwhile, when my son's friend and his mom are just watching this whole thing, like, what is happening in your house? And I'm like, this is what we do. We step and poop. Dogs eat it.

We all laugh at each other. Good times. All right. Thanks for watching the goat. Is this the season finale is available now? Good job, everybody. What a great show. I can't wait for a Emmy season. Do you think we'll get nominated? Yeah. Do you think we'll win?

Probably. Right? Those things are all political. And we've got everything on our show. We've got all the races, the sexes. It's a slam dunk. We're going to win. Boys wear pink. Check out our clothing line for toddlers. Also, got some tour dates coming up. Hawaii. Second show added in Honolulu. Go ahead and come to that show. That'll be fun.

And what else? One of my son's bedtime stories. Reminder, if you're just listening to his nonsense, if you're watching on YouTube, it is subtitled. See you next week. Once upon a time, there was a little lion. All they wanted to do was roll. But every time they rolled, it sounded like this. Every time they rolled, it sounded like a mouse. So...

They ate a big lion. And then they tried to rule around the lion. And they twiddled it so far like feet. So they ate more lions, more daddy lions. And then they tried to rule and it fell right down. And they were so happy. The end.

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