ReWives ReRant: Toxic Environment
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So I am in Atlantic City in a hotel room. I came here to do an appearance right after Watch What Happens Live. Usually Watch What Happens Live is live and you walk out of there at like 1030 and or 11 sometimes and people have been drinking and it's chaotic. And let me explain to you what Watch What Happens Live is like.

And I've been doing it since the very, very beginning when Kathy Griffin said she wouldn't do it. She's done Johnny Carson and she would never do Watch What Happens Live. That was the beginning. I remember her saying that to me. And of course, now Oprah's been on Watch What Happens Live. So is every other major celebrity. So is Hillary Clinton. So anyway, I've been doing it since the beginning when Kathy Griffin wouldn't do it. And it used to be.

You went into a building and you went up an elevator and you came out and there was like this bank of offices and a corner office was the head producer who owns the production company. I think they still produce it. And I would sort of sit in there and wait with my group and it was their personal office. And then you would come and go into this other room, which was like a little cute green room and get your makeup done and go out to watch what happens live. Now...

And I remember they used to do craft, they used to have a bunch of food they used to order in the beginning, but there wasn't, you know, they would make your own cocktails. They've been doing it right since the beginning, but now it's really, you walk in through, you go in through some other side of the building, which is like the bowels of the building and coming through the back. And there are all these different people and they're staged in one area and there's a step and repeat and there's a backstage and there are multiple green rooms and there's tons of social media and there are all these different things.

And so you're still in like the bowels of the building and there's still banks of offices and there's snacks in certain places, but it's like you moved from one place to another and one dressing room to another. Cause I might be recording another show earlier and they used to not record shows. And now they record other shows earlier. So on this day I came in and was in one like busy, big makeup room that I had,

only seen once before where multiple people could get their makeup done. And I ran into Teresa who had been on the show earlier and that was a fun interaction. And then Andy comes in, he always comes in, which is great as a host. And, um,

And then you're shuttled to like another room with your whole group where like your green room is and you're doing touch-ups and you're waiting to go out. And it's just like a lot of chaos because there's usually drinking and people in action and social media and it's, and just, it's just crowded and there's chaos. And so you leave and you're just exhausted. So I went in to watch what happens live on the heels of a conflict with Andy Cohen. I announced rewives and on that morning,

Before it was announced, I texted Andy Cohen and said it was my birthday. And I said, happy birthday. This, you'll think, is amazing or whatever. So I sent him the clip of Elizabeth Moss on Rewise. And he said, fun! Exclamation point. I...

because of my crazy abusive childhood, that was not normal. I have spidey sense. So you see, he said fun. And then, and I said it to Paul and I said it to like a couple of other people and they said, that sounds great. I said, no, that's not, that's not, that's negative. They were like, what? I'm like, I know it all. Him saying, oh, fun is, is like, he doesn't know what to say. So he's just saying, oh, fun to just say something. So then, um,

I said something like, it's not, you know, it's really amazing. It's really interesting. It's different. And it is different because, because I don't see any other former fired housewives having Elizabeth Moss, Emmy winning, you know, world renowned actresses on their shows. And I said something and he said, I'm just glad to see you embracing the housewives. That told me everything I need to know. That told me, oh, we're going to go on a ride. Not a real, I didn't know we'd go on the ride. We went on a ride, meaning,

And he's shading it a little because he's read everything I've said. But he always acts like he hasn't read anything I've said because so many things have happened, whether it's the MTV award or other things, or my show Money Court gets announced and I don't get a text from him congratulating me. And I'm always like, why did he congratulate me? Because he does seem to read everything. So he did read everything, I guess, that I've ever said. I never knew if he did because he doesn't ever bring it up. So now he's effectively saying you've shaded The Housewives a

But he didn't say this yet. So everything is just, oh, great. I'm just glad to see you embracing the housewives. Okay. Then we pitch it as a show on Bravo because we thought it would be a great show. Sort of like they had something about the couch. There was a couch show on Bravo. We pitched there because we think with all the clips, it'd be an amazing show. We didn't know how successful it would be. It was just an idea, but we thought it was pretty good. I mean, the production company thought it was pretty amazing. The way that Bravo responded seemed like

there was a little bit of sensitivity around my launching rewives, like it being a little personal. And in the past I've had situations where Bravo, it's very personal to them versus only being about the business. So I did write a book called business is personal, but Bravo definitely has, um,

taken things personally that are business. So then Andy jumps into the housewives pool and while he's on his show, he says something about that he was surprised. And he says that I've said negative things about the housewives, which I've said it was toxic because it was for me. And someone recycles what Andy's already said and he doubles down and he says he's shocked because I've trashed the housewives for so long. But he doesn't say any of this to me privately. He says it publicly.

So I'm thinking, am I going to respond to this? So the same day that that comes out, the same day we had been turned down for watching what happens live to promote rewives.

So the same day that, and money for it. So the same day that that article, that all the articles come out about Andy saying he's shocked, watch what happens, lives call. And I predicted this. I woke up in the morning. I said, wouldn't it be smart of them to book me? I don't know if they'd have the guts to do it, but to book me on Andy's show right after it's, he's been sort of calling me out publicly, not privately. So they book us on the show. I'm like, here we go. My whole team's like, here we go. I still don't hear from Andy. So now,

The show comes and I hear that a book with Jeff Lewis. So now I'm booked on the show and I talked to my podcast producer. She's very smart, Amy. And I say to her, he's all over talking about being shocked and it's picked up everywhere. Do I just wait for his show and comment on what I think? She goes, no. Why would you give it all to his show? Say it on your show. Mention it all. I'm like, wow, this is unique because everybody's used to going on Andy's show and him getting all the scoop on everything.

And so I said, oh, okay. So I commented on it. Still nothing privately from Andy. So I'm like, all right, let's let it ride. Let's wait.

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Hello, everyone. I am Lacey Lamar. And I'm Amber Ruffin, a better Lacey Lamar. Boo!

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So I go to Andy's show and it's chaotic as always. And I bring my daughter and we get there in the afternoon. Thank God, because it's taped and it's going to be on days later. So it's not 11 o'clock at night. I'm not drinking alcohol. I get there. Andy comes in. I see Teresa first. I talk to Andy. All good. We do a TikTok together. Then we're on the show. He comes right out with it. Okay.

So we have, you know, beef or we have a conflict. The only reason it's not real conflict is because we both know the game. Now, Andy and I are friends and we do go on beach walks and we do text and he has told me things that no one knows. And I know where all the bodies are buried and he knows exactly how much money I walked out of there getting paid. And he knows I'm not going to tell anyone because we're both grown ass adults in the entertainment industry first. That's what we both are first. We're both protecting our own realm.

So I know that while he didn't do it privately, even though we're friends, that he's saving it for a show because he's putting business first. So he says we had beef, et cetera. And he said, I said this. He said, I said, surprised. I said, shocked is what you said. And I said, we haven't discussed this.

We've only discussed... This has only been out publicly. You chose to air this publicly, not privately. Just like a housewife. He saved it for the show. He did not say it to me. Here's my text. We text about the dumbest thing you could text me privately. A, that you didn't love that I'm doing it. B, that you're shocked. Any of this. So I didn't know any of this until this came out in the public. So then he says, you said it's toxic and you said it's boring. I said, I didn't say it's boring. I said...

He said, you said Legacy was boring. I said, I haven't seen Legacy. He said the announcement. I said, the announcement was boring. We're announcing two shows. We're recycling and putting the same people through the rinse cycle and recycling former and fired housewives over here in a quote unquote Legacy. And we have a new show. Great. We have a new show. That was the idea that I thought was more interesting. But I did think Legacy was boring. Guilty. And I copped.

So I'm in between Jeff and Andy. Andy's to my right. Jeff is to my left. So now Jeff comes in. He goes, and what's so different about this Housewives? Because I really and what's so different about your podcast? So now shots are fired. Like there's a little shade. It's like, you know, real subtle, not that subtle.

shade and frosting. Oh, really? And what's so different? Ooh, teeing up the ball. What's so different about this podcast? So I've just gone over here and said to Andy, well, you said shocked and it was boring. And also I'm entitled to talk about it. Check that box. Now I'm over here playing tennis and Jeff is like, so what, and what's different about this? I'm like, well,

It's not first and fourth. And I don't even realize that Jeff has a podcast about the housewives. I've never heard his podcast. So I guess he talks about the housewives, but he's not even on. Okay. He has nothing to do with the housewives, but I, and he's up. So I didn't know any of this. I didn't even know what I'm about to tell you. So I say to Jeff, he says, and what's different. I said,

Because I wasn't thinking of him. I said, well, it's not fired disgruntled Bravo housewives talking about the podcast. So he says, I was fired. I didn't even know this. He says, I was fired. And I said, well, well, that's why you're so bitter because he's saying he's clearly bitter about something. It doesn't even involve him, but maybe he thinks it involves him because he's a fired employee. That's now talking about his former high school, which is what I've said. So maybe now he thinks this involves him when it really doesn't. So I,

He then is like, wait, I was just teeing up your podcast. He's trying to pretend, which later Andy clarified was shade. He's trying to pretend he wasn't shading me. And he was just wondering what's different about my podcast. And I was like, if you're going to come for me, you're going to get shot. Check that box. Now he's on alert. So anyway, now we're going back and forth. Then they say, why, um,

Did you unfollow Kyle? And I do unfollow and follow people randomly. Like sometimes someone's posted so many times about something. Maybe it was about housewives and I wasn't on housewives at the time. Maybe it was about Erica Jane. I have no idea. I literally don't know, but I am friends with Kyle. I do text Kyle and I, I,

I'm literally friends with people that I don't follow. Andy points out, we don't follow each other. Jeff, I am sort of, you know, bullshit friendly with, we don't follow each other. And I follow random makeup artists and weird people like from stores that have reached out to me. I have no method to my madness of my following on Instagram. Someone could clean out my house. I do know because I do know that I don't follow Balenciaga, thank God, because other people have been trolled for following them. I have a random system for who I follow and unfollow, but Jeff,

What are you coming in for me? Because Jeff was behind making faces. Okay, so all this is to say, for me, none of this was anything. This was just a normal day at the office because I'm used to going in to the Bravo Clubhouse with...

armor on, not even knowing. And I thought to myself, what I didn't say to Jeff Lewis, which I'm mentioning it all with you, this is not spilling tea. This is spilling strong coffee. We're going to spill strong coffee on re-rest. No diluted tea. This will be strong coffee spills. So what I didn't say to Jeff Lewis is what's different. It's not former or fired disgruntled housewives slash employees. It's also different.

internationally acclaimed actors, comedians, actresses. Elizabeth Moss is not going on, you know, Housewives recap shows. So sorry, not sorry. That should be the name of this show. But what was interesting to me after getting unbeknownst to me, sort of

quietly ambushed, I come off and my daughter's like, whoa, that was shady. And my assistant's like, whoa. And my assistant, my daughter and everyone around said, oh, they came for you. It looked like there was a tennis match that you were in the middle and you were just hitting back balls. And my assistant said, the difference is everybody else comes in with a script and you are not, don't have a script. And you're just answering in the moment, which happened to me on one reunion, one reunion. You can ask Andy, there was a

firing squad on the opposite couch, firing squad. And I took them all one by one. How? God only knows. But I did. So don't come for me unless I send for you. That's a Kenya Moore line. Because my assistants were everyone in my team. This is what shocked me. I thought, oh, that was fun. Andy, Andy. And I thought, oh, that was sort of fun. And that was a lot. Everyone on my team said,

That guy, Jeff Lewis is mean. He's not a nice person. He came for you for no reason. Like you didn't do anything to him. I actually brought he and his daughter a gift. I brought him an Italian simple little nothing, you know, a hand painted ornament from Italy. Um, I bought them when I was in Italy waiting for Christmas and I've only given out one to Jeff Lewis, to be honest with you. Um,

And I gave a cute, like, squish-a-mo-hello-kitty pineapple to his daughter. I looked up how old is his daughter. Her name is Monroe. And I realized that that would be nice for her. And he came with a firing squad for no reason, with no goal. I'm not on a show with you. I have nothing to do with you. What are you so angry about? What do you care about what I'm doing? He looked at me like I had just vomited on him.

He had something going on. So it was a bit of an ambush. I totally held my own. But it's another thing my assistant Taylor said that was interesting. She said, you often say how we represent you, meaning when we're out and about, meaning my staff, you want us to just like not be have our heads in our phones all the time and be nice to people and be kind. And same goes for me, Bethany. Sometimes I'm looking at something. I'm stressed about something. I'm not looking up. I'm not saying hello to somebody I've passed in a lobby. And it all matters because that's their one interaction with me.

And they experienced it as rude, even if I was in my head or I wasn't rude. And so they and I realized that that person will tell everyone they know that I was rude. And my assistant said, he's that person now. Everyone we were with thinks he is so nasty and mean.

and came for you for no reason. They were like, what did you do to him? And I frankly don't know. So that's the strong coffee about what happened at Watch What Happens Live. And I'm not saving it for Randy's show. I'm giving it to you here on my show. I'm not just coming in for the low-hanging fruit, clickbait and trashing people. I'm giving you context and telling you a story. This is my experience at Watch What Happens Live.

Paul said to me, Jeff came for you. Then he quickly became your friendly sidekick. The whole point is what my assistant said about how people will perceive you. The other thing is what's crazy is how desensitized I have been. Here's the moral of the story.

It is a toxic environment because I did not even realize that people were coming for me for no reason. Like, I didn't do anything. I mean, it was, it felt like, you know, Andy, it was business as usual. But I'm sitting with a person who came for me for no reason whatsoever. I literally was just sitting down at a talk show and the other guest was...

was trying to gotcha me the whole time. He was just angry. He didn't want to play the game Andy set up for him. And it just, it felt, it felt toxic and it felt, I felt justified. I'm going to listen to these bitter, angry people about what I should and shouldn't do in a podcast. Why do you care about what podcasts I'm doing?

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Welcome to the CINO Show. I'm your host, Cino McFarlane. I'm an addiction specialist. I'm a coach. I'm a translator. And I'm God's middleman. My job is to crack hearts and let the light in and help everyone shift the narrative. I want to help you wake up and I want to help you get free. Most importantly, I don't want you to feel alone. Listen to the CINO Show every Wednesday on iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I am Lacey Lamar. And I'm also Lacey Lamar. Just kidding. I'm Amber Revin. Okay, everybody, we have exciting news to share. We're back with season two of the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network. This season, we make new friends, deep dive into my steamy DMs,

answer your listener questions and more. The more is punch each other. Listen to the Amber and Lacey, Lacey and Amber show on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Just listen, okay? Or Lacey gets it. Do it.

I talk to people about navigating these moments.

Their stories are full of candor and hard-won wisdom. And you'll hear from scientists who teach us how we can be more resilient in the face of change. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.