I Was A NYPD COP Involved In A Shooting | Steve Pedullo
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My name is Ian Bick and you're tuned in to Locked In with Ian Bick. On this week's episode, I interview our first member of law enforcement, Steve Padulo, who is a former NYPD police officer. We all make mistakes, experience failure, and fall down in life. But if you decide to get back up and use it as fuel to your fire, you can choose to not let it define you. You can make it through to the other side

and turn it into an opportunity. I went from owning a popular nightclub when I was 19 years old to becoming a federal inmate by the time I was 21. Join me, Ian Bick, as I interview people from all over the country who have experienced the rock bottom of the American justice system.

Steve, welcome to Locked In with Ian Bick. Thanks for having me, man. It's great. You are our first law enforcement officer. I am excited to be here, man. It's great. It's fantastic. Yeah, we're excited to get your perspective and being an officer in one of the biggest cities in the world, New York City, like that crazy. The stories I'm sure you have for us are going to be insane. I have so many. I've probably forgotten half of them because I'm so used to it over the years. But I'm sure a lot of things will come back to my mind and we can definitely discuss a lot of that.

Awesome. So starting from the beginning, where are you from? South of Nassau County, Long Island. Married father, two little kids. Served in the New York City Police Department. I had 16 years of service. And here we are today. How old were you when you decided you wanted to be a cop?

ever since I was a little kid, I always, I always had that intuition, that sixth sense of if something was wrong, I knew it. If something, I just went with it as a kid, as a, you know, I got feeling. So I could say probably when I was like five, six years old, I knew I wanted to be a cop. It's back in the day. I used to watch that show. Why TJ hooker? No talking about. Well, I'm 1995. Yeah. 95. So, uh,

So I used to watch, ever since I was little, I always knew I wanted to be a police officer ever since then. - I wanted to be a firefighter growing up. - Firefighter? - Yeah, and then even in high school, I wanted to be an FBI agent, so it's kind of funny. - Do you still apply for the FBI or no? - I don't think so. - I think you might frown upon that. - Really? Yeah, I think so. - I think a little bit. - I think, you know what you should do? You should definitely apply and see how they respond. - Yeah.

That'd be funny. My cousin was going to apply and then he's like, I think I got to cut you off for a little bit while I'm going through the application process. Do you know any known felons? No. Wait a minute. Yeah. Was anyone in your family an officer too? So my uncle Frank, may he rest in peace, he was a Port Authority Sergeant. He had over 30 years with the

but the, uh, Port Authority Police, uh, Police Department, unfortunately had passed away in 2008 from a 9-11 related illness. Oh, wow. He wasn't in the towers, but he was work, he was working, uh, that day and he had gotten sick, unfortunately from that god awful event. And he came to his demise and may he rest in peace. I'm sorry to hear that. It's okay. Thank you. Appreciate, appreciate that. How old were you when you became an NYPD officer? I was 24 at the time. Uh,

Um, he went to the police academy, you know, six and a half months of, uh, of grueling nonsense. Yeah. What's that like? I hear some stories about that. All right. So when you go into the, when you go into a police academy from the hiring process, you have to take a written exam. Okay. So get past the written exam and then you call, get called in for a mini medical. So your mini medical is pretty much eight hours of sitting down, filling out paperwork. You're in this little chair, you're all cramped up.

After you're admitted to medical, you have to go physical, psychological, and the psychological consists of 1,600 yes or no questions. So on question number 342, do you love your mom? I'm serious. All right, yeah, you circle yes. And in question number 1,200, do you love your mom? You circle no. So now after you take your written psychological, you have to draw. And at the time, I kid you not, they wanted you to draw a person.

And they want you to draw a house. And I was coached on how to draw it. I drew the house. I drew the sun in the corner, meaning I'm happy. You had to draw a tree, which I don't freaking know what the hell that's about. And then after all that, you sit down with your psychologist and

and you have to explain yourself. Like, do you have like a chart? I'm like, what are you looking at? Like, what the hell are you looking at? Because some questions you've answered yes, and some questions you've answered no. Maybe you made a mistake, and they wanted to interview you with that. And then you go for your physical, which you have to be in somewhat of a decent shape before going into a police academy. You have to do running and sit-ups and all that good stuff. And once you pass all that,

We'll let you know, kid. And then you get the, you literally, some guys I've heard, we get the call at like 10, 11 o'clock at night. You still want the job? We'll report to Queens College 8 a.m. tomorrow.

What? Yeah, that's not a joke. At least I had a couple of days notice. I could have told my employer, you know, listen, I'm resigning. You know why? I'm going through the process of the police department. And that's it. You get to Queens College and it's three days of standing in a suit and sitting and it's very uncomfortable, but that's how it goes. And

kicks off from there. What year was this that you graduated the academy? So I went in July 1st of 2004 and then you graduated in January, like mid January, uh, right in time for the New Year's Eve detail, which was my first, you know, my first New Year's Eve working. Technically you still assigned to the police academy because we didn't graduate yet. We have something called gun and shield day. Um,

which we knew were graduating, so you're in your dress blue, in your blues, so to speak, and you're issued your shield and your firearm. And technically, you are a full-sworn police officer, even though you're still in the police academy. And, oh, go ahead, kid, welcome. They put you right on, right into Times Square. Which is pretty, which is nice, because we were lucky. I worked at Detail three times in my entire career.

And fortunately, it was all in the 30s degree, so to speak, or some degrees it was like negative eight, negative five with the windshield and thank God I never had to deal with that because that is just...

freaking miserable. It's horrible being on, you know, being outside, you know, for 16 hours and you're standing on your feet the whole time, you know, get breaks here and there, obviously, but, uh, it's, you can't get that cold out of your body when you get home. It's horrible. But I was fortunate enough not to deal with that. And, uh, it's pretty cool. If you've never been to Times Square, highly recommend it. Highly. It's unfortunate though. Like you weren't, they put you in that pen and people like, well, how do you go to the bathroom? They said, well, that's why the Lord invented adult diapers. Um,

People like, yeah, you got it. Once you leave that pen, you can't, you're not getting back in. That's wild. Yeah, it's crazy. It's pretty sick. What's like the craziest New Year's Eve story as an NYPD cop? I really don't have a crazy New Year's Eve story, but I remember one New Year's Eve I was working and, you know, you get there, you got to be there early in the morning, like 7, 8 o'clock in the morning for the detail. Now it's like maybe it's 11 o'clock at night. I'll never forget this. Four people come up to me and maybe five or six blocks later,

from the ball and they go, "How do we get close to officer?" I'm like, I'm like a real smart ass. I'm like, "Oh, you're early, early for next year." And it's like, "Oh, we just got..." And I felt kind of like an asshole because, you know, we just got married. I'm like, "Oh, come on." So I literally escorted them five, true story, I escorted them five blocks. We have something called like a family panel for cops and stuff like that. And I said to some other officer, "These are my cousins."

Okay, and and be literally on the guys any closer you'll be you can press the goddamn button yourself Okay, you get to let the ball drop and to this day. I'm sure they have a story to tell on their children So I felt you know, I felt bad for them because I was like a wise ass tired and stuff But uh, yeah, it's like a feel-good story that they'll never forget. That's good I'm sure not that many people would do that. Yeah, it's not that not many people would do that but um

I think you're right, actually. Not many people would do that because it's unfortunate that when you are, you're a human being at the end of the day, right? So you get that question like, officer, can I cross the street? Officer, by like a 1,200th, 1,400th time of hearing that same question when there's police barricades and all that other nonsense, right?

people get burnt out, people get frustrated, right? So, but yeah, I had to do the right thing and hopefully they'll never forget that experience. I mean, I think it just puts it into perspective too because like from the criminal standpoint, they don't really know what the officer's going through, like what that person had to go through that day. You could be like their 10th arrest and you just don't know what the feeling's like or what's going on in their mind. Of course, of course. And I think a lot of people just don't understand that aspect of it. Yeah, it's, I cannot, I think you hit the nail on the head with that

Because if you got an officer on a car stop and if he or she might be a little disrespectful to the motorist or whatever the case may be, I always say try and get that person to benefit that one and vice versa. If I was the officer and I was pulling somebody over and they were a little frustrated and they were

a little rude. I always try to give them the benefit of the doubt as well. Maybe they're on the phone with their husband or their wives, what have you. They got into a fight. Their kids are sick. You know, people don't realize that we're human beings at the end of the day. And, you know, people do have bad days and maybe, you know, people just learn how to let that go every now and then and just give them the benefit of the doubt, like I said. Definitely. So you get out of the academy. What's like your first assignment? So when you're in the police academy, you

have a list of where you're going. And we're sitting in, we're still in the academy and our OCI, it's called an official company, is reading out last name Smith, the 102, just whatever, Padulo, 75. And I'm like, what? And if you don't know, the 75 precinct is probably if not one of the busiest precincts in all of the police department, at least in Brooklyn. And it was like,

throwing right to the line lines then and back then um there were no i mean there were cell phones obviously but like there was no gps's and stuff so you got to the 75 precinct and we have a couple days of orientation okay and all right orientation's over here's your map kid they give you a map they give you physically give you a map and you're walking around like oh wow look at this and it's like you're in a you're a rough table you're you're no joke like it's it's it's a

It's real world out there. And you're walking around, you learn real quick as you went and gone. Once you got settled in, what's like a typical day like as an NYPD cop? In that precinct where I was at the time? Yeah. So what we did was we would have a flip-flop schedule. So one week we would work, I believe it was like 9.30 a.m. till 6. And then we would flip-flop to the following week, which was 6 p.m.

5:30 at night till 2:00 in the morning. So one week of days, one week of nights, one week of days, one week of nights. And after some time, you would have the way the posts would go, we would be like a steady post partner, so to speak. And this guy Doug, Doug used to work with me. "Oh, what do you want to do today?" "All right, cool. We'll do this." "Well, you're looking for an arrest or you're looking to write some tags or whatever, and then we'll take our meal and then..."

Go about our day. Try and... When it was cold out, try and stay warm. There's a saying that a good cop never goes cold, hungry, or wet, right? So you would find out where your post is, where the place is to eat, where could we hide out for a little bit if we needed to stay warm, and where could we take our breaks. And then...

like washing and just keep going over and over and over again is it true that like officers have actual quotas like for speeding tickets arrests that they need to accomplish in a day so it's not a quota but it is a quota so to speak so i could uh i had this argument with someone i'm actually a co-worker of mine years ago had uh i was having a you know summer party and one of his civilian friends were there he's like oh my god i work with this guy he's like oh you guys and your fucking

He's like, and your quotas? And I'm like, well, let me ask you a question. What do you do for a living? And the guy goes, well, I work for a boat factory. I'm like, oh, you work for a boat factory. Okay, so you sit at a desk. He goes, yeah, I sit at a desk. Great. So if you would say you work 22 days a month, and if you played on Facebook or whatever you played on your phone, at the end of the month, your boss said to you, hey, Ian, what did you do all month? I did nothing, boss. Don't think they're going to be pissed, right? Yeah.

Yeah. So to answer your question, there was a certain level of expectation and certain level of performance that you needed to do, um,

on a monthly basis and they expected it from you. And if you didn't, repercussions would come. Now with that pressure on someone, say if it was a lazier officer, would they go out and look for people that maybe didn't deserve to get arrested or were innocent in that sense? Not necessarily in that, but in a lazier officer, and I know what you mean by that, they would be giving less desirable arrests.

um maybe he was a homeless guy and he had an open container of alcohol but then when you run him for warrants um he has an active warrant now because the guy the gentleman didn't take care of his warrant so with the open container plus the warrant that equals an arrest but mind you some of these people haven't showered in probably weeks we have a car full of stuff that the auto has to be vouchered you can't throw that's their personal property so that type of arrests would be a real headache to deal with and

That's why guys went out and they did what they had to do, you know, so they weren't given like a, they called a bag of shit. So you weren't handed a bag of shit if you did your job as an adult. And as an officer, how much leeway do you get to decide like whether you're going to give someone a ticket or arrest them? Like where's the line? I know. So let's start with the hardest. So on a domestic violence case,

My hands are tied. Okay. If you call 911 and we get there and the, whether it's a male call or a female call, it doesn't matter. And they're like, well, I just want him out of here. Well, I'm not a bouncer.

So I'm not a bouncer. That's not my job to just throw somebody out of the house because if he comes back and kills you, that's on me. Okay? So with domestic violence call, there's zero tolerance. On other stuff, there is some discretion. There's different ways to go around certain things. And on a car stop or something like that, there's always discretion. There's always... My thing was, if I pulled you over and if somebody's on the phone and somebody's talking...

You know what would get them a warning? Politeness. I'm not asking you to kiss my ass and call me sir every three seconds. That actually would annoy me. But if you were polite with me, listen, officer...

I just got into a fight with my boyfriend. I'm really sorry. 99.9 would be, man, have a nice day. Please drive carefully. If I pulled you over, I got the teeth sucking and the rolling of the eyes. These cops are racist. He's only stopped because I'm blah, blah, blah. Then you were getting nailed. Then you would get nailed really hard. And people don't realize that. Is that your demeanor and your attitude...

will work a long way when interacting with, at least with me, with the police. - Yeah. Now does, as being an NYPD cop, like kind of what you see on TV, but the average American watches a ton of TV. I watch like the rookie shows like that. - Okay. So I used to watch a show, Blue Bloods, and ironically, with Tom Selleck. - Yeah. - And ironically enough, they filmed that where I used to work. - Really? - They filmed that like three or four blocks from the actual, so I've been on that set hundreds, like countless times.

I met Donnie Wahlberg a couple times, a really nice guy. I never met Tom Selleck and some of the other cast members. I don't watch any of those shows, so to speak, because I can't. Just being a cop for so long and some of the stuff that they put on television, it's totally off base. It's totally like, I would say, a movie prequel.

like Pride and Glory or Brooklyn's Finest. Like some of the lingo was really spot on. But a TV show, I really... What's the most off-base thing you would say? The most off-base? Okay, so in that show Blue Bloods, for example. So it's like his character, his name's Jamie, right? So Jamie was like three years on the job. He's going to like the narcotics unit or he's getting to the specialty unit. That's bullshit.

That that's, that's nonsense. Unless you know somebody or you have what we call a crane, which is a hook that

then that person, that officer can get moved around. But in reality, you have to have some time on the job before you even consider to apply for specialty units like highway patrol, canine, et cetera, et cetera. Gotcha. Now, once you got settled in, you have a few years under your belt. What kind of officer do you become? What are your principles? Well, one thing I always said, you have to be squared away. So my number one perspective was whenever I was in the public eye, I

I always, my shoes, my boots were always polished. My pants were always creased. My arm, my gig line was straight. My arm was a crease polish because my personal pet peeve was a sloppy officer. I can't stand it even to this day. Like you ever see a sloppy state trooper? No, they're so squared away and so professional.

And that's, I always felt my professional presence, when you're speaking to somebody, this officer means business or you're not screwing around. And they've interviewed, I saw this one interview with a cop killer. He killed a state trooper and he interviewed this person and he said, well, why do you challenge this officer? Because he looked like shit.

And they thought he can get over and he did. And unfortunately, he he murdered. He went out murdering that that that state trooper. Wow. Yeah, it's it's so I've always. So to answer your question, my officer that I became, I always my goal was to always be squared away. If I worked 20 shifts a month, 19.5 of those shifts, I was I was squared out because there was that was my number one goal. I'm curious. What do you what's your opinion on out of shape cops? Because I know like the public has a big opinion on an out of shape officer. Shame on them.

Shame shame on them. I just read recently that the NYPD Dropped completely the one point get a correct to graduate the Academy You have to do a certain amount of push-ups certain amount of setups and you have to run one at 1.5 miles and certain amount of time you're a female It's you know, it's different time, but they scrapped that run they scrapped it completely and that is you're opening the floodgates and

As a joke, you're, you're, it's not safe. If you're, I'm not talking like a few pounds overweight. Like you have some officers that are graduating the academy now that are morbidly obese, that are just like completely out of shape. It's not, it's you're, you're a walking heart attack. You're, if, what happens if you're fighting with somebody and I have to come help you and I can't because I'm out of shape. Like it's, it's crazy. So to answer your question, that's,

You're asking for a lot of trouble. What if they let themselves go on the job like you get in you're in Top tip shape and then you let yourself go happens all the time It happens to happens to happen to me it happened to the best of us I used to be well to maybe 45 pounds heavier than I currently am now and you look great now. I appreciate it. You flirting with me No, I appreciate that

But it happens too. It's the job. You're working a lot of hours. You can't brown bag it. Or if you're doing a detail, there is no place to brown. You can't walk around with holding your lunch the whole day. So you have your Chinese food or your pizza. And after a while, it starts to trickle and it starts to get out of control. And it's not good. It's not good. I always said...

that the police department, for example, so the state police, they used to have an incentive. So every six months, by volunteered, you could do push-ups, sit-ups, and run, and they would give you like an X amount of bonus. So like I'd say it's a $2,000 bonus. You're telling me if I'm going to work out, I'm going to stay in shape, you're going to give me two grand twice per year? Hell yeah. But with the city, it's such a large department, they can never do that because half those guys and girls will probably fail and will not pass, and then we have a huge problem.

Interesting. How does it work with like the free items? Like you see in TV movies, the officer gets like a donut or whatever. Like, do you go into a place and they say, hey, officer, here you go. And they get some perks from that. So the way the way that works like that, there's really nothing is a free item. OK, we had certain areas that, you know, we didn't.

As a business owner, you can't tell me what to charge somebody, correct? Okay. But also as an officer, you can't take anything for free because that's a violation of a patrol guy policy. And technically it's corruption. Really? Sure. Of course. Why are you giving me this free sandwich? Are you going to let my customers double park? But there were business owners that would charge maybe less of what they would charge a civilian. Okay.

And we appreciate it. It wouldn't influence my decision to respond to a call there any slower or faster. Like, oh, this is Mike's Pizzeria, for example. I gotta have to do Mach 3 to get to him. But you always like, to one restaurant, we would go to a Thai restaurant, right? They would say, okay, officer, no charge.

You still put money because that business is going to lose money every time a cop walks in the door. But unfortunately, what's I saying? One bad apple spoils the bunch, right? So we had this one guy. I'm not going to mention him. Asshole. He would go in there and he would be like, all right, thanks. And he would go over and over and over. And I'll never forget this one time I was picking up dinner for my partner and I. And you try not to. You would rotate restaurants. You wouldn't constantly go to one spot because it's.

You get bored of the food, right? And it's not fair. It's not, this guy owns, this guy's running a business. So I was like, oh, it's $28. And thank God I had money on me. Holy shit. Cause if I did, I'd be embarrassed. And I paid him and I found out this, this officer screwed it up for the rest of us. So,

that went over very poorly put it that way on that topic what kind of corruption do you see in nypd to be honest with you in my time in the cor in the police department i saw zero corruption really i never i never i could hold my hand over a stack of bibles uh i've worked with 99.9 of good men and women that are outstanding in every avenue in every aspect i've never seen any type of corruption ever like i responded unfortunately to tons of dead bodies right and

And grandma, so to speak, had $1,000 cash in the apartment or whatever case may be that I easily could have put into my pocket, but morally I couldn't do it. But yeah,

I never personally witnessed anyone, anything in that level. Do you think it goes on or it just, I'm sure it does. I'm sure it does. Thank God I never personally saw something like that. And it's unfortunate, but you know, if you're working at McDonald's and you're a piece of garbage, or if you're the CEO of IBM, if you're corrupt, it doesn't matter where you are. You're going to,

If you're not a good human being, you're going to do shady shit. Yeah. And eventually it gets found out and it's a minority. Oh, yeah. It gets found out. And it's not worth it at the end of the day. You have, if you do the math, you know, officers in retirement plus their benefits. And if you live, you know, 50 years, God willing, after your retirement, you're talking about millions of dollars, millions of dollars with everything combined. Is it worth it to you? To steal, you know, 500 bucks off a stranger, to piss it off, to get fired? Not worth it.

Yeah, some of the people like I've been interviewing on the podcast, you hear their story about like, say they took 200,000 from their employer and then they lose 15 years of their life because of that. Yeah, so you do the math. It's not really worth it. So you're making like, if you break down, so you're 200,000, 15 years of life, so you're pretty much making like three cents an hour. Yeah. It's not worth it. If you're gonna steal...

We're going to steal big. Now, Rikers Island, what's the story behind it? Why is it such like a hot ticket item that everyone talks about? Do you want to laugh? I've never been to the island. Really? I've never been to Rikers. I only get informed by what I see on the news. But you hear stories about it. Yeah, of course you hear stories about it, but the conditions are so...

uh deplorable in there like with the toilets and the water and the shit's leaking through it's funny though it's like it's like the precinct too some of the conditions in the precinct like you be on doing your business they're number two and there goes a nice little cockroach right by you oh you shit like what the like yeah it's the conditions are obviously different than compared to the island so to speak but uh from what i'm hearing it's not good it's and they want to shut it down but where do you put those people where do you put the prisoners

you just, you let them go. Like, what do you, what do you do with that? Like it's, how does it make you feel as an officer that you had people sent there essentially? Um, well, I never really thought it was a really good question to, to, to, you know, to answer, uh, that you asked me. Um, I've dealt with, I've had maybe right around 200 arrests in my career and I've dealt with guys from, you know, open container of alcohol with a warrant all the way up to, you know, the guy, uh,

raped his child's mother, and he beat her with a golf club, and he burnt a cigarette in her forearm. Wow. So to send that piece of garbage to the island, so to speak, felt good putting somebody like that. It's unfortunate that this victim, I'm sorry, let me back up.

He was part of the mafia, this guy, the Russian mob. Wow. And they got to her while he was in jail for a couple of days and she dropped the charges. And I remember sitting in an office and the attorney was like, oh, you look upset, officer. I'm like, well, the woman was just raped and we have no complaint. She was like, what do you want me to do? Nothing. I walked out of her office and I was, it's frustrating. You see that a lot happen? You see it happen sometimes when charges are dropped or...

or the officer, the paperwork's sloppy, so to speak, and charges get knocked down or dismissed, you know, it can be very frustrating. So maybe you see more, like, corruption on the defendant's side more than anything than the officer's side. Of course. And then the prosecutor's office, they always want to pull everything out. They always knock everything down. They don't want to deal with it. They have the conviction rate, so to speak, but...

like whatever you charge i could i could charge charge with 20 different things and they're like oh we're knocking this off we're knocking this off knocking this off because they don't want to deal with this so to speak which it's it's ridiculous do you see situations where the prosecutor like like you're saying pleads them out and then those individuals are back on the street all the time and then they're back in all the time and how is that handled all the time it's just it's like a revolve it's a revolving door now with uh with the laws and the no bail reform and stuff like that which

I obviously don't agree with. I mean, you have some of these guys that are getting out with very serious charges and it's like constantly rotating door. It's an open door in and out and in and out. At what point do you say enough is enough? I guess what I read in the paper recently, I had three loaded firearms, three separate times and the guys out on the street. I mean, that's, that's pretty serious. Yeah. I read an article where someone got out on bail and then killed someone or the stabbing incident. Yeah, correct. And if the judge did their job, so to speak, that person would still be alive. It's crazy. But,

But then there's also situations where like the no bail makes sense and certain, I mean, giving someone bail makes sense. Of course. But so how do you differ that? Like what's the solution to that? That's a really good question that I don't know how to answer that we could

a politician need to figure out. I mean, obviously if someone does, has a suspended license or petty larceny, so to speak, something like less of a violent crime, then that person deserves the bail or no bail, so to speak, and they need to be released on their own recognizance. But if someone does like a home invasion or a burglary, a robbery, and then like you're getting out

That that's no good, man. That's that's crazy. I feel like the federal system has it more down pat. Like in my situation, it's are you a flight risk and are you a danger to the community? So if you say rob the bank, they're going to mark you down as like a danger to a community. Of course. I mean, you're doing a bank robbery. Let's touch on that for a second. I guarantee that wasn't your first time. You didn't wake up on a Sunday. Hey, Ian, you want to go rob the national national bank?

They've done that before. So it's a pretty serious crime. You had a long career with the NYPD. What are like the top three craziest things you've witnessed? Top three craziest things I witnessed. Well, one, I was involved, you know, in my shooting in July of 2016. It was...

That was unbelievably. The second craziest thing I ever witnessed, unfortunately, with my partner and we're about to go to dinner and there's a car accident behind us and I'm like, come

Come on, man. I got my food. I want to get out of the car. So as I'm getting out of the car, I see two cars, right? One rear-ended the other car. What I don't see is the Chinese food delivery guy between both these cars. Oh, wow. Yeah. So this guy right here was actually just leaving his bachelor party. And he blacked out drunk at the wheel. And this is a livery cab. And he literally pushed the delivery driver forward.

so to speak. So I get out of the car and I'm like, you know, I have to pick up a car accident and I look, I'm like, holy shit, there's a guy that's crushed. I could literally see his skull. Did he survive or no? No, he died. It's unfortunate he passed. And, uh,

What gets me to this day when I think about it sometimes is that now I had to go to the hospital. You know, they still did like the CPR and they tried to revive him, but he was a goner. And I'm at the hospital, you know, trying to itemize the stuff from his wallet. I remember I take out his wallet and I has a picture of his little girl at the time and they were on the beach. Maybe the girl was like two or three years old. But the guy, they wanted to give that motorist seven to 15, I believe.

And his attorney argued that if he were to get out in 15 years, his wife couldn't conceive. The judge bit. So I think he got like four to seven. He's out now. He's the guy he's released. And that's like a manslaughter charge? Yeah. So it's vehicular manslaughter. I don't know the exact charge, but that could be one of the charges. And the third craziest thing I ever saw back in, I want to say, 05, 06, guy on a motorcycle was

I was running from the cops and then the guy, the motorcycle turned and a guy who happened to be Dewey T-boned the bike, okay? And I get to the scene and the guy was like maybe 42 years old. He was a 21 year old kid. His body was here but his helmet was like 50 yards away. And I remember, I'll never forget this, they're doing CPR on the body and the ambulance door on the side was open and you could see the blood coming out of his mouth and they're doing chest compressions on this kid.

And a few weeks later, I'm at, you know, Mirage nightclub in Westbury, you know, at the time. And I see the guy who dies, he's brother. I looked right at him and he looked at me like, what do I know? Meaning me, where do I know you from?

I should have went up to him. I should have said something, but I didn't. I was just, I was nervous. Like we were going to fight or whatever the case may be. I didn't want to deal with the headache. I was with my friends. I was off duty. I just left it alone. I walked away. But those are the top three craziest things I ever experienced. When you see traumatic experiences like that, how does that affect your mental state? Like as an officer? You know, it doesn't really affect.

It can affect me personally. It never really affected me. I've been to, unfortunately, several suicides. Like one woman, I remember she, she taped, she went to her bathroom and she lit like charcoal in a bucket and she was breathing in. What is that? The sulfuric, whatever acid that's coming from the charcoal. And she made all the vents were closed off and she left it. Like she had a cat with her and like the cat was like,

The cat's like lifeless. The body is lifeless. I've been to one guy hung himself and the body is just like sitting there. And I'm like, oh my God. But as an officer, you know, that really didn't bother me. As a parent, that was like my child. Like she cut her arm. I'd be like, oh my God, oh my God. But at work, it really didn't affect me that much.

Is there a support system for officers like checking up on you? Sure. There's, we have something called PAPA, Police Officers Peer Action Association, that if an officer feels, you know, he or she needs help, you can call anonymously. Okay. And you can get, they call you back and you can talk. You can meet the other person on the phone. It could be a cop you're talking to. It could be a deputy inspector. You don't know who you're speaking with. And it's always, there's tons of,

ways an officer can reach out but it's unfortunate that they don't reach out sometimes because

This stigma of the mental health, and I'm glad you brought this up, actually. I was going through something back in a day, and I decided not to go to the police squad. I got help on my own, okay? And I'm happy I got help. I got help for myself. But if you reach out, now you're labeled, okay? We had this one officer. He did three tours in Iraq, and he wasn't right. He wasn't right in the head. Whatever he saw, whatever happened to him,

But guys at work were making fun of him. And I would get very offended. This guy is fucking, he's defending our freedom overseas and he's asking for help now. And you guys are labeling this guy? You're out of your mind. But that stigma of like, you reach out for help. Now, unfortunately, they have to take your gun. They have to take your shield. You don't want to inflict, you know, God forbid, do something stupid to yourself. And unfortunately, you're labeled. That's why you read in the paper, like I read in the paper recently, a 23-year-old officer in Staten Island took his own life.

And he was at home with his dad.

22 years old, you have your whole life in front of you and it's not worth it. I mean, look what's going on with the senator too. He's getting labeled and everyone's, the Republican or Democratic aside, he asked for help and now everyone's like, he should resign, this and that, just for going and asking for help. Yeah, that's crazy. And it's shame on them for someone saying like, this person needs help and you're shaming them for that. And if anyone watching this, I want to say one message that I want them to remember, it's always okay. It's okay not to be okay.

And it's never worth it at the end of the day. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

And I want anyone watching this, I always want them to remember that and take it from me, man. I'm happy I reached out. I'm happy I got myself help when I got better. Very well said. Well, we're glad you made it through to the other side of that. I appreciate that. Thank you. Now, this has been a really big article and news story all over the U.S. right now. So I'm very curious about your perspective. What do you got? In the prison system, as inmates, we see a lot of guards, right?

And CEOs hooking up with each other. Now, recently there was that article about that female officer that was hooking up with those. Crazy. Does that happen in the New York police department? Does that mean like coworkers hook up? Yeah. Our coworkers hooking up with each other. If I would be lying to you through my teeth, if I said that's not, that's not the case.

You know, we have something called the patrol guide and the patrol guide, it's like pretty much a 2,500 page book, so to speak, with different rules and regulations. Does everyone read that? Yeah.

You only read that book if you're studying for your sergeant's test. It's like reading stereo instructions. It is the most dry, drawn-out material. I'd rather stare my eyeballs out than read that book ever again. It's horrific, okay? But in whatever procedure, whatever section is subordinate, a supervisor is not permitted to date a subordinate. It happens all the time. And if you get caught doing that,

Big no-no. But it does happen. Me personally, I would never date, at the time when I was on the job, another officer. It just wasn't for me. It was something I'd never be interested in. Was it as severe as what's going on on TV right now with this female officer or was it never that bad? I don't think it was ever that bad. But there was a story last year.

How this officer from whatever priest, I believe in the Bronx, she's at a holiday party and she's giving her lieutenant a lap dance. And then naturally all the cell phones come out and it's on the front page of the paper. It's there. The press is at this lieutenant's house, unfortunately. It's not good. No.

Now, were you ever in a position where you had to do something maybe against your morals or principles because other officers were going through with something, maybe someone that was higher above you? Thank God, never. I never had to do ever. There have been a few times where...

that I was ordered to make an arrest and if I'm giving a direct order from a supervisor, if I don't follow that order, I could be suspended on the spot. It's failure to abide by a lawful order. And unfortunately, if my sergeant or lieutenant or et cetera

that person's under arrest. You can't say, no, you have to, I have to listen to that order. I don't agree with the order, but I had to do it. And does that happen? Of course it happens. Of course it happens. It happens sometimes more often than, you know, than the person likes. But if a supervisor is directing you to do something, you have to do it, whether you agree or disagree with it.

What was the most dangerous situation you were put in as an officer? My shooting that occurred on July 17th, 2016, 742 in the morning. I'll never forget that day. I had to cover patrol. So I wasn't on patrol at the time and I had to cover and I was walking into the precinct. It's a Sunday morning.

And the boss is like, "Hey, Steve, you know, you want to stay inside today, answer the phones?" And I'm like, "No, thank you." I can't sit still for... Because when you're on the T.S., it's called a telephone switchboard, you get the dumbest calls. The public is like, "It's stupid as shit. I don't want to deal with it, okay?" But now I'll go out. So as I'm standing in roll call, my dispatcher is, you know, raising me up, you know, police language and saying, "We have an emotionally disturbed person at this location." I'm like, "Okay, great."

So I want to get breakfast. I'm all bent out of shape. It's early Sunday morning. And as we're getting ready to go out, my dispatcher known as Central is saying, we have a male Hispanic with a firearm, white shirt, red hat, blah, blah, blah. So now we're flying to the call. And she says about a minute later, be advised, it's now 8:30, which is a robbery. She goes to 30 at gunpoint, numerous calls.

And when she says numerous calls, it's legit. What does numerous calls mean? Meaning numerous 911 calls. Meaning this person's calling, this person's calling. So you have numerous calls. So I pull into the parking lot and I'm driving and I exit the driver's side. And under two and a half to three seconds, I see the guy walking. He's taking a loaded .40 caliber from his waistband.

And I'm pulling mine out and I'm like, I screamed, don't do it. And he either said, die pig, whatever he screamed at us. And he opens fire directly towards us. Now, the girl I was with, she split over to the right. I split to the left. That's your partner? That was my partner that day. I never worked with this girl a day in my life. Never worked with her a day in my life. She fired twice. Him and I going at it. I fire 13 times twice.

And he's down and he goes for a second firearm. So when I key my radio, I'm like, show me your effing hands. And he simulated it. And I let two more rounds go. He didn't have it, but he was simulating a second firearm. Two more rounds flew. One missed, one of him in his chest. And when he got hit in the chest, he had blood on his hands.

So now at this point, the backup is coming and I'm screaming to the boss behind me, like, "Cuff this guy. What the hell are you doing?" Like, so I walk up to him, holster my firearm, cuff him up, and I walk off and I start to cry a little bit because I'm trying to process, like, what just occurred. Like, what just happened?

Now my boss, my direct supervisor pulls up. I'm like, yo, am I hit, bro? Am I fucking hit? Am I shot, dude? And it was just like, he's like, Steve, turn around, turn around. I wasn't hit, thank God. And ambulance pulls up. Blood pressure is 186 over 110. Your blood pressure? My blood pressure, yeah. And they're like, you're gonna struggle. We need to take you to Elmhurst for trauma. Was this your first shooting ever? My first shooting, yeah.

ever, yeah. And what year was this? 2016. So this is like, what, 12 or 13 years on the job? 2016, yeah, just about, yeah. And now...

I go to the hospital, my delegate's like, "You have to call your wife." 'Cause it's Channel 5, it's breaking news, it's blowing up. Now, if I call somebody, right, and you don't pick up, I'll text you. So I call my wife, it's Sunday morning, she's sleeping, and I leave her a long voicemail, and I kept reiterating, "I'm okay, I'm okay." And she had to go to the bathroom, she's like, "Why is Steve leaving me a voicemail?" She calls me back like two minutes later, she's hysterically crying, I'm like, "I'm not hit, I'm fine."

Wasn't shot or anything. But from the shooting that took place, there was 22 rounds exchanged. And it was two buildings. So I wear these devices. I'm not throwing the car. I'm not wearing them now. I have severe tinnitus, which is nonstop ringing in the ears. I also have hearing loss on top of that.

Oh, from the shooting? From the shooting, yeah, because there were so many rounds exchanged. Wow. So what happened to the individual? He wound up passing away. And what was that like when you found out that he passed away? Relieving, to be honest with you. And I want to touch on that. It's unfortunate that a human life was taken, okay?

At the end of the day, we have families to go home to. I had to protect myself. I was only doing what I was trained to do. My partner was only doing what she was trained to do. And we had to protect ourselves because we have loved ones to go home to. And it's unfortunate that he had to pass away, but that was his decision to have a gunfight and he lost. And what happens next? Do you go back on the job? What's the process? So what happens is, so since I'm injured...

From the shooting, I'm out. It's called line of duty, line of duty injury. So on performance of my job, in the form of a police officer, I was out line of duty injured for about six and a half, seven months. So I have to see my department doctor every once a month to check in and go through numerous tasks, et cetera, et cetera. And by the seventh month, he's like, you're going to have to go up for early retirement. And I wasn't really too sure how I felt about that. I loved the job at the time, but at the same time, I'm thinking,

This might be a blessing in disguise of what's going on. I'm lucky to be alive, okay? Because when you're involved in a shooting, they do a 3D reenactment. Every bullet's accounted for. It came to my attention months later that one bullet was 18 inches from ripping my head off. And just knowing that, my hair is standing off my hands, right? Just knowing that, it just wasn't my time. It just, it was not my time. Um...

So anyway, so I go up in front of a medical board and it was like getting all these questions like out of the left field. And I walk out of the room like, what just happened? Like I wasn't knowing what to expect. I get home, you know, you can call, you find out, oh, denied. I'm like, all right. So I go up in front of the medical board three months later to give you three times to go up in front of the medical board. Second time I went up, I was in 90 seconds, went home, called, approved, approved. And then you have to wait.

three or four months for to go in front of a pension board instantly approved and then my attorney calls me I'll never forget I worked at midnight meaning I worked overnight so you're still actively working I'm still actively working but I'm working like it's called restricted duty so I'm on a desk you know I'm on a desk duty it's like when a professional sports player um

has a certain amount of time left on that contract, right? Let's say they injured themselves or they blow their ankle out. No, they can't ride the bench, so to speak, until they do their contracts on. Of course, it's the dead weight to the team, right? So the way the police department views you is you're pretty much your dead weight. You're, I hate to say it like that, but it's the truth. Like, you can't be a full-duty police officer, okay? So,

went in front of the board instantly approved my attorney called me and he goes uh you're done and i'll never forget those words he's like it's been a pleasure my chris it's been a pleasure i hung up the phone i looked at my wife she's like how do you feel shake you're retired

I had no words. I couldn't even, to this day, I still can't understand it. I can't process it, obviously. But it was so surreal at the time. You know, then you have to call the pension board. You have to make an appointment, come down, you know, decide what kind of monthly payout you want to do, what all your money you've saved and stuff like that. And they give you your retired police department ID card. I must have looked at it on the train for like, I was staring at it. It says retired. Like, holy shit. Like, this is real. And it was just like, say again? Yeah.

No, no. I was like, holy shit. Like, this is fucked. Like, I'm retired. I was 39. I was 39 years old at the time. I mean, it's pretty chill to be like 39. You're like, holy shit, I'm retired. And yeah, that's my story. And what did you retire as? As a police officer. So we had spoken to my captain at the time. And we're like, get a detective. I wasn't arid. I was very humble. Okay. I'm like, get a detective shield. And he was like, eh.

I could put in for it. Like, I'm like, I'm not going to force it. It's to carry around a detective shield. Like who cares? Um, but we, these did it right by us. And, um, we retired. Do you feel like that incident kind of like, um, killed some of maybe your career dreams that you had for the NYPD? Um, an incident like that, not that it killed some of my dreams, but it definitely put a lot of things in perspective at the time. Um,

I can't imagine going through that and experience ever again. It was so traumatic and so, I don't know what word I'm looking for. It's something I think about all the time.

It's like a bad memory that I can't remove from my mind. You know, coming that close to, God forbid, not being here, it's something I'll never get over, ever. On that note, did you ever have to deliver bad news of someone's death or passing? Never, thank God. It's always like a high-ranking officer that will deliver a message to a family member. It's never the rank of a police officer. It's a supervisor that's very high up. Uh-huh.

How do you think family members of police officers are feeling when they see incidents like yours occur on TV and they know their loved one is in the line of duty at that time? What do you think is going through their mind? It's a lot of crazy stuff. Because since I retired, I will see on the news, this officer was killed, God forbid, and then this officer was killed. There was a female officer in Chicago two years ago. She was on a car stop, a young mother, and she wound up dying. And I remember sitting there, I'm just crying. I'm

almost blind... It's so heartbreaking to see that stuff on television. Especially someone in my position, you turn on the news, this officer was shot, this officer got killed, etc., etc. It's...

It's very hard. It's heartbreaking to see stuff like that What about you after the shooting any issues like with your mental health or PTSD from that incident mental health is fine What happened was years later? I definitely developed some type of PTSD last year because I would see all the stuff on the news like These guys are getting killed except and it's just like I

Being a father at home and I'm like holding my kids and it's just like I'm watching the news and it's just like that just started to spiral and spiral and spiral to the point I'm like, I need to get some, I need to speak to a therapist, which I'm, it's probably one of the best things I ever did. And you still actively? I'm still actively, I go to therapy once a week. That's great. It is initially,

I was very embarrassed. Okay. And I'm like, no, I'm a big, big, tough guy and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It's like an alcoholic who thinks they can get a grip on their drinking and they can't. And I was just, I knew I was going down a very spirally dark road. And I said to my wife, I'm wanting, I had enough. I need help. And she's excellent. Thank God. She is excellent with

you know, getting appointments and blah, blah, blah, and all that good stuff. And she found the therapist, which with coronavirus, you couldn't find one. Yeah. I didn't know that. Apparently there's a lot of,

People going through a lot of different issues a lot of different things and it's very difficult to find a therapist Thank God luckily enough I was she was able to find me one who I am very comfortable with which is another thing which is second plus and She's probably the most one of most amazing people. I I could tell her anything I don't hold back because building a relationship you therapist if I'm gonna lie or not be honest There's no point of going

There's no point. You're building a bullshit. You're building something on nonsense. Like you need to be honest and upfront with them for them to work through your issues. And it's probably one of the best things I ever did for myself. Yeah, and there's a stigma out there that if you're a bitch, if you're a man and you go to therapy, and I always like had that a little bit like, oh, men don't go to therapy. And then I had court ordered therapy as part of my probation. And I was like dreading doing that during prison. I was like, oh, I don't want to go to therapy when I get out.

I find a therapist. The first one I meet, I actually hit it off with her. She's like this 85-year-old woman who refused to retire. That's pretty cool. And I'm meeting with her. And it's just like it gives you a different perspective. Oh, yeah. And we started our first sessions like not even talking about my situation. It was just like talking. Just bullshit, right? And she eventually got me to open up. And then once they forced her to retire because of COVID and layoffs and everything, I went to see someone else. And it was just like not the same. But, you know, it's good knowing that like –

an adult like yourself, a man is putting it out there that, you know, therapy is good. Therapy is probably one of the best things someone could do, especially if someone had, not just cops, I'm talking people in general. If you're going through marital problems, if you're going through problems with your children, work issues, parent problems, your parents, any issue that someone might have, therapy is always, and you'll get to people, but what is it going to do for me?

Well, why don't you go to a couple of sessions and sit down and speak to someone? And you keep finding that you can hop around to a different person. Of course you can. If it doesn't fit. Of course. If you sit down and, you know, I was fortunate enough to sit down with this woman. Her name's Dominique, by the way. I'm going to tell her. Hi, Dominique. Is that the cover up for like the stripper? That's her. Well,

We'll talk about that off camera. She is the most like, and she's not judgmental. I feel like I've known her for years when we sit down and we talk. People that say going to therapy makes you weak. Well, shame on them. Shame on them because you're a coward to say something like that. You're reaching out for help and it makes you weak. Well, then I guess I'm weak and I guess everyone else is weak because I want to get myself better. Because mental health is just as important as physical health.

Definitely. Now, we just heard from you some of the lowest points of being an NYPD officer. What were some of the high points, the positive aspects? Some of the high points. Okay. So I made some lifelong friends that I will forever consider them family. I've worked with some people that they're not my partners. They're my family. I've worked with...

several people that I am so proud to tell them, you know, who tell them that you guys are like my brothers and sisters to me. I met a lot of great guys and girls on this job, had a lot of cool experiences. I met a lot of celebrities where I used to work. I'm

one of the nicest celebrities I ever met, uh, Stifler from American Pie, Sean William Scott. I never watched it. You never saw American Pie? Never. You gotta check, you gotta slack on that. Uh, maybe he's watching this podcast. He was probably, I spoke to him for 20 minutes, like, as if we'd known each other for years. Paul Giamatti, you know who that is? You don't know who Paul Giamatti is? I'm a visual person. Yeah,

I've met several people. Ray Liotta was very nice. You know who that is? I think so. Do you ever watch Goodfellas? I think maybe. I'm behind on this. You didn't watch Goodfellas in prison? Yeah, I lost three years of my life. Come on, dude. But to answer your question, that's one of the positive aspects. And another good aspect is that I was...

I could proudly say that I paid for our wedding, okay, by ourselves. You know, we got married, I got married in 2013 and Hurricane Sandy happened in 2012. I remember telling my boss, I'm like, listen, just put me on the roll call and I'll go to Staten Island. I must have worked well over 100, 110 hours of overtime that month. But,

that paid for my flowers, my DJ, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And through my job, through my employer at the time, I was able to purchase our house where we live with my wife. That's great. And no one gave me a thing. And I don't want to sound arrogant or...

whatever you want to say but we earned everything that we have in our lives we earned every single time you know i i know friends that are fortunate enough their parents give them like they sell the house i get a discount and all that other bs not us you know like the american dream and

And we, you know, a few years ago, we did our yard over with the pavers and the grill and the pavilion and blah, blah, blah. And it's proud for me to say that we could afford it. But that's some of the positives, that if you want to earn, the money's there. Now, you just mentioned celebrities. Were there any celebrity arrests you were a part of or witnessed? Never part of any celebrity arrests or witnessed, but...

One time, we were filming. You've watched Impractical Jokers? Yeah, of course. Okay. So shout out to Sal from Impractical Jokers because I wasn't there for this. But allegedly, because at the time, my mother-in-law, she had passed away. So I had to fly to Arizona. And my team I was working with, they were filming Impractical Jokers. And they got out of the car and they knew it was Sal. They threw him against the fence. They coughed him up. They're pretending to talk on the radio. He's like, whoa.

Whoa. And like they flipped the script on this guy and he was actually really cool about it. I wish I was there to witness it. But to answer your question, no, I never was involved in any, but I wish I was there to see him. Well, what's an officer's perspective on body cams? I'm for the body camera. I am 100% for the body camera because without the body camera, without any camera, so to speak, people are going to speculate. Okay. People are going to be like, Oh my God, this is what happened. No, no, no, no, no. Right to the camera.

there's, there's the body camera. Cause if you have nothing, if you're not doing anything wrong, you have nothing to be worried about. That's how I look. That's, that's how I look at it. Uh, it's unfortunate. I've heard stories of like, you know, uh, you and I are partners, right? And, uh, all right, you have the arrest. I'm going to go downstairs, but my body camera's running and I'm going to the bathroom and I'm looking at my cell phone and I'm looking at something I shouldn't be looking at. And my body camera's running. And then I look down and I'm like, uh,

So then I have to tell my, it's more embarrassing if anything, I have to go tell my boss and blah, blah, blah, blah. But before I retired, that's when they just started implementing the body cameras. But to answer your question, I'm for them and I'm 100% for them. Now, there's a lot of people in America that see the select few officers that are doing a bad thing that aren't like your typical normal officer.

And that causes a lot of Americans to be anti-police. What is your message to those individuals? I'm so happy you asked this question. So I hope anyone watching this would never categorize an officer, if they did something criminal, if they did something immoral, okay, that every cop is like that. Because that's not the case. Okay. Are there bad apples? Yes. Are they racist, so to speak? I'm sure there are. I personally never witnessed it.

But I ask the public, I ask anyone watching this, please don't categorize any one person's actions as a whole, as a police department. Because truth be told, 99.99% of guys and girls that take that job are good men and women that uphold the law and they do their job flawlessly. That's great to hear. I mean, when I know looking back on it now, now that I'm older, wiser and everything I've been through, I felt like I was very like...

all the police, like this and that. Just because of my situation, I felt like I was getting picked on and this and that. Sure. I can see where you come from. Guys, like, you know, it's... But throughout this journey of, like, owning the nightclub and stuff, there were some great detectives that were nice to me. They would give me a heads up if something was happening. Of course. And I gave them mutual respect. And then even now, like, some of my...

friends have family members that are officers and I have good relationships with them. And like, I'll get comments from people online. They're like, so are you like anti-police or this and that? I'm like, no, like there's a couple of bad apples. Yes. In my situation, there were bad apples, but that's not the norm. And people need to know that. Of course. I want to tell you this one story that I was told in the academy. Okay.

So my instructor was telling me that once he was, you know, on the beat, whatever, he was arresting somebody. He was a transit cop and he locked somebody up for like, I don't know, I guess he had hot to turn style. But he bought this guy a slice of pizza, let him smoke a cigarette in the cell and he treated him like a gentleman. Just because he's hot to turn style doesn't make him a bad person, right?

Several months later, the same officer is on the training platform and he's fighting with someone. He's fighting for his life. And the guy he had locked up four months ago was on that platform and he jumped in and he helped arrest this guy. He goes, now we're even.

So ever since I heard that story, your reaction is great. Ever since I heard that story, I always try and treat someone with the utmost respect. Just because you ever suspend the license, you steal some bullshit from the store, doesn't make you a bad person. You knew who the players were and you knew who the bad dudes were, so to speak. And then the average person that might have screwed up and made a bad choice, a bad decision, those are the people you treat with the respect and what they deserve. Yeah, I love hearing those videos and stories about if an...

a prison guard is getting like jumped or attacked and the other inmates step in because it's like, that's not cool. You don't do that. Of course. And they defend that person. Yeah. Like whatever, like, you know, I'm retired obviously, but if I'm where I live, I see a car stop. I'm once a cop, always a cop.

If I go to a restaurant, I'm always trying to sit my back towards the wall to watch who's walking in. I always have that... Did your background check me coming into this? I actually was doing like 90. I'm like, in bed, Google. We'll get to that in a second, actually. It's funny you brought that up. But where I live, whatever, anywhere, if I see a car, a cop on a car stop, I slow down to see if that officer is okay just because that's who I am. Okay?

Okay, it's funny. You just mentioned that googling my wife We go on our first date and she googled this shit out of me out of you out of me We actually met online my wife and I believe it or not tender Tender didn't exist back then. I'm happy didn't so I probably have an STD. So what is that like? I probably have like an STD right like I heart cupid. No, it's like big bald cops for you No, we I mean I have plenty of fish and

And I remember all the prisoners used to be on POF because that's how they would meet girls to send them money. I heard. That's crazy. Like you're incarcerated and you're on POF. And women would dig that shit, right? I hopped on POF in prison. I was on Tinder, POF, but it's so spammy. It's like there's all these spam things. I totally forgot about POF now that I got to go download. Yeah, I got to download that, right? So my wife and I, we met on POF. We probably spoke for like two weeks.

before we met in person and we're talking and she's like, oh, how was your boxing match? I'm like, what the hell are you... What are you talking about? Like, how do you know I was involved in a boxing match? She's like, I Googled you. I'm like, oh, come on. It was... It's pretty funny she actually found that out because if you... My name is not that...

My last name is Padulo. And it's like, you Google me every, you Google yourself. Well, you're not, you personally, but if someone, a lot of stuff comes up and you get sick, like someone wants to stalk you or something like that. It's great. I plan on doing it after I leave here, by the way. I mean, I Google myself all the time because you look at the analytics and you have to see what videos are trending and stuff. Of course. And now like, I feel like more good stuff's coming out. Like when you Google me now, my website's the first thing. Whereas before you would Google me and it's Danbury nightclub owner accused of fraud. And that,

it just causes so many issues because no one's looking at the date of the article. Yeah. Like you could do something terrible 20 years ago and maybe it's not even that, that bad, but it's bad. Yep. And it can just ruin someone's life. And I think a lot of like inmates that don't have, that are coming out of prison and are in like, say my situation, but they're not actively on social media promoting a good message. No one's doing that good article about them that they turn their life around or this and that. It's just like the bad article. The negative comes off.

And that haunts them for the rest of their life. It's horrible. It's unfortunate. If someone makes a bad decision from the past, it should not affect their future. Especially like a young man like yourself. Like you did... That's why I started following you on social media because you did such a positive turnaround. You did a 180. And I'm like, holy shit. Like I caught on to that. I saw all the positive information. You started popping out. And by the way, shout out to JD, man. That was probably one of like the best interviews...

Sunday night the kids are going to sleep. I'm like, all right, honey. Go now look the YouTube like I was great That was his it his his I'm huge fan of that guy. It's awesome. I'm glad you brought that up So from a law enforcement officer's perspective, what's like your opinion on me and what I'm doing like as a whole? Well, I keep looking in your eyes. I could hear the Beatles playing right now. I'm staring at your eyes right now I could hear like the music going But what you're doing is a whole right now It's like I give you I tip my hat off to you like so much credit especially if someone like that like I

Jesse, is that the guy's name? Jesse Crossan, yeah. Another big fan of him. He's trying to put out all his positive energy and do the right thing and turn his life. It's amazing that you didn't fall back into that revolving door like we spoke about earlier. It's like, okay, you got nailed. Let's see the next game. And I'm sure you being in prison, you've talked about that. Guys that's old me know is like,

The prison life. So while they're in... You ever see the movie Blow? They get concocting all these different things. Are they ready to get released from jail? Oh, it's like smuggling drugs again, et cetera, et cetera. But it's great, man. You guys are like, you're killing it. Thank you, man. I hope this blows up like...

Joe Rogan status. That'd be great. That'd be great. Yeah Do you think there's officers though at the same token or not even just officers maybe agents? Whoever that don't feel that same way when they course of course there are unfortunately there are guys and some girls that They are like, you know, they're very Filled with piss and vinegar. It's like all this guy got locked up. Well, he's a piece of shit. That's not the case man That's you didn't beat your wife 20 times over right? You made a mistake. I

Paid you death to society last time I checked, right? Now you're moving forward. But yeah, there are, there are, unfortunately, there are officers like that, that just won't, don't have that positive outlook and that positive perspective in life, which is very, it's very unfortunate. Do you think there are crimes though that aren't redeemable? Like for instance, we interviewed someone that walked into a school with a shotgun, didn't, didn't kill anyone, but still nonetheless caused a lot of traumatic experience to individuals. I saw it. What's your opinion on that? Do you think he can be forgiven in that sense? Um,

That's a really good question that I don't know how to answer.

Now, I didn't watch that interview fully, but I remember I did see some of that, how someone attacked him with a machete. Yeah, that's the craziest part of his story, that he served 17 years, comes out volunteering, he's genuinely remorseful, and then he just gets attacked. Yeah, like that's like 17 years later, like that's crazy. And then as he told that part, I never, I wasn't looking at his wrist during the interview, but then I'm like, holy, and the way he was explaining it, I'm like, his wrist was hanging out, and like he was in front of me.

rough shape but there are some crimes like obviously crimes against children you can't you can't articulate that that that exact crimes and stuff like that's that's like the worst that's that's i'm sure you've seen in prison like guys who were violators of that got what they had coming towards them definitely and that's what what's the uh worst crime scene you've ever been on the worst crime scene it's an excellent question uh we gotta go we gotta go back to that question because i don't i don't know if the top

So it wasn't really a crime scene. So we got a call for an aide. I got a call for an aide. And I'm like, all right, whatever. So I'll never forget this. The guy, it was like a new apartment building. It was like maybe eight or nine stories high. The guy's sleeping in bed. And the wind was so strong that the glass broke.

To his bedroom, okay? Bedroom window. And the glass, like, shattered his arm, but hit, like, an artery. So when he's getting out of his bed, the blood is, like, splattering all over. So when I get to the apartment, because when you have an aided, the ambulance comes and the police get called also. It looked like the guy was stabbed to death. No, he was still, he wrapped up really good and stuff. I'm like, who died? He's like, no, this is me, bro. And I'm like, holy shit, like, you survived this? Like, you need to say your prayers. That's probably one of the craziest scenes I've seen, though. Wow.

I mean, there was blood like at every inch of that apartment. It was like you're in the movies. Wow. What's it like working with informants in New York City? I personally never worked with informants. There's a whole procedure when it goes to that. Like if you to be a CIA, you want to be a continental informant, there's certain guidelines and rules that...

you know, the sergeant or lieutenant has to sign them up and they have certain protocols to follow. I personally never worked with the CI, but I couldn't, I couldn't tell you to be honest. But do you have like unofficial informants, like as a regular officer? I'm sure you do. I personally never had one, but that could bite the person that could bite the officer in the end, in the,

in the ass. - Working someone off the book. - Yeah, that's because if that person gets injured, okay, the CI gets hurt, and now the CI comes forward of like, well, I was working with Officer Smith, unofficially, we have a huge problem. You can get burned pretty bad for that. - What are a couple facts that the average person wouldn't know about the New York Police Department? - Couple of facts.

Not all cops are racist. Let's start with that one. There is a quota, so to speak, and the officer sometimes has no discretion. What are the facts about the New York City Police Department? That's a really good question, man. You kind of caught me off guard with that one. I'm bringing the heat today. You're bringing the heat today. I see that.

I don't know. It's the best that I can answer that one. I think throughout your interview, you've answered it too well. So I wanted to see what else I could get out of you. You'd fire away, man. I'm ready. Now to close out the interview, what is your message coming from a member of law enforcement to that person that maybe is like me and was involved in some crime intentionally or unintentionally as a youngster or someone that was middle-aged or older, older than you? What's your message to those individuals? Okay, so first off,

I want these, I want everyone to know that don't believe everything you hear or see. What I mean by that is like, video is so we'll go back. So for my shooting, there was somebody on the seventh floor filming the whole thing. And what this kid did was he edited the part out of me being shot at first. Okay. He edited out all the good parts. He puts his bullshit video together. And at the end of the video, it goes, guess what y'all? He was a, that was a white cop that killed him too.

Okay, so now this kid puts his video out on the internet and people are so quick to judge and so quick to bite on something like that. It infuriates me because you don't have all the facts and circumstances. So all I ask for, the message that I could put out, I want everyone to know that not every cop is a racist. Not every black is a criminal. Not every person is this.

As a whole, do you understand what I'm saying to you? I want anyone who makes a judgment call or a decision, I want them to know all the facts and circumstances from a police-involved shooting, about bad information. And also, I want the public to know as well is that cops, they're good people. They're good men and women that are there for the public. That's why we took this job. That's why we took that employment. You might interact with a cop having a bad day. Don't take it personally.

Don't take it, don't take it, if you got spoken to the wrong way,

rubbed off your shoulders and uh tomorrow's the first start tomorrow's the first day definitely you know well said and agree and i think it also it goes the same to like an officer as well i think there's a lot of and you're obviously not one of them but there are some officers that look at like say me who's labeled as a felon like not giving us that chance and i think like there are cases where you know everyone should be kind of given a second chance if they serve their time 100 100 and

And I think if officers, you know, watching this and hearing your story and, you know, knowing your mindset, I think that's great that it's getting out there because it's not out there. You know, you don't really hear people coming out saying, hey, I support this person. He did X, Y, and Z, but this is why I stand behind the person. Of course, man. It's like just because...

People make mistakes and people screw up. And I screwed up in the past and nobody could walk on water last time I checked. And I certainly can't walk on one. I have my imperfections like you have your imperfections, et cetera, and so forth. So I always ask is the public is not don't judge anybody. And they also have another message that be kind to one another. OK, because everyone has a battle that you know nothing about.

Okay. I saw that sign a long time ago and ever since then I tried to live my life like that. Some of them might fight alcoholism. I don't know. You're strongly alcoholic and why is this person a full-down drunk or why is this person abusing narcotics that they need help with or this person has a bad gambling problem or et cetera, et cetera, which by the way, I have to check my parlays after the interview.

Steve, we're putting out positivity here. At the same time, it's a great point you brought up. You have to remain positive. I'm a very positive person in general. I could be on an airplane and the guy could be nose diving. He'll pull up. Don't worry about it. Try not to scramble. Try not to panic.

And if people are having a rough time in their life, always remember the ship, the storm cannot last forever. Things will get better. I promise you. Steve, thank you for coming on today. This talk has been incredible. It's been a pleasure, brother. Thank you for having me. You're awesome, man. We got to do dinner sometime or something. That's it. I'm looking forward to that prison lunch. Get that prison lunch. Definitely. You want the mackerel or? What am I choice? You have a menu? We got mackerel and ramen noodles. Let's do it, bro. Thank you, Steve. Thanks, brother. I appreciate it.