The Party That Turned Violent & Changed My Life Forever | Kyle Cervini
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The NBA playoffs are here, and I'm getting my bets in on FanDuel. Talk to me, Chuck GPT. What do you know? All sorts of interesting stuff. Even Charles Barkley's greatest fear. Hey, nobody needs to know that. New customers bet $5 to get 200 in bonus bets if you win. FanDuel, America's number one sportsbook.

21 plus and present in Illinois. Must be first online real money wager. $5 deposit required. Bonus issued is non-withdrawable bonus pass that expires seven days after receipt. Restrictions apply. See full terms at fanduel.com slash sportsbook. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. Kyle, welcome to Lockton, man. Straight from Rochester. Straight from Rochester, man. My family's out there. We were just talking about that. We were just talking. It's like a stone's throw away. And that's a nice part of town, too. Yeah, we go like a couple times a year. I'll have to hit you up next time I'm out there. We'll grab some food. Sure, let me know.

I can't really tell you any good places because everyone will tell you, like, get a garbage plate. That's what I just found out about last year. I didn't know what that is. It's, you know, it's burgers and, you know, some stuff. But that's what everyone tells you. But go to Country Sweet. Country Sweet Chicken, that's where you should go. Wait, can you walk into any restaurant and order a garbage plate? Mainly. They've all kind of jumped on the trend. So you can, like, you can find one pretty much anywhere. And it's all the same price? Yeah.

Depends. Depends where you are. Like, I bet you're starting around $10 and probably going upwards near $20 depending on the quality of the joint. Yeah, someone DM'd me, and this girl I was talking to last year was like, did you get a garbage plate? And I was like, no, I don't know what that is. No, I'm going to be getting in trouble for saying this, but it's like if you don't have anything to do later, maybe, because you're probably going to be like –

Where's the bathroom? I'm serious. Like it'll mess you up. It's good. It's good. You know, I'm going to get, they're going to hang me for this. So did you grow up in Rochester? I did. I did. Born and raised in the city. And we moved when I was about 15. They was getting, the neighborhood was getting crazy. It was crazy, but it was just like peak insanity at that time. Cause now it's like even worse. I go there now and I'm like, this isn't my neighborhood.

So we moved when I was about 15 an hour west to like the middle of nowhere. And that's when I get into trouble. Who did you grow up with? I grew up with my mother and stepmother. I'm nervous. I'm sorry. I got to relax. You're doing great. I grew up with my mom and stepfather. And my dad for a long time lived right around the corner.

my parents were always divorced ever since I can remember. So did you have a relationship with him at all? Your biological dad? Oh yeah. Yeah, definitely. Real good. We were all pretty tight. He kind of had the normal separated parents, you know, weekends, Wednesday, Thursday visitation and stuff. And he literally lived like a street over for many years until we moved. And then he moved to a suburb of Rochester and we moved an hour away. So it was like,

Kind of got a little more difficult then, but I was in my teens and working. So then I started working for him, you know, eventually. So then we kind of caught up from there.

you know, years of kind of visitation kind of stuff and then work together for a long time. Were you closer with your mom then? Did you spend more time with her? I did spend more time there. And as a kid, I kind of preferred it because my dad was like more of the authoritarian and I could kind of do whatever I wanted with my mom. And that was just because she was kind of busy.

And she was a lot more easygoing, but she was real busy with, you know, she rescued animals my whole life. And the animal rescue scene in Rochester is busy, like real busy. Really? Yeah. My house was like a zoo. My second grade class, this is no joke if anyone remembers this, we took a field trip to my house.

to see the animals. And then everyone had to write like, what was your favorite animal? It was crazy. So did that job pay the bills? No, nonprofit. Yeah. It was actually like a large expense. So all the stuff that she did, rescuing, vet work, and then adoption, everything just kind of fed itself, you know, and, uh,

She had to take care of all these animals nightly. It was like a big deal. Like a hundred cats, Burmese python. We had a monkey. I had a monkey growing up until I was like 18, I think, if it died. Was it big? No. You ever seen the movie Outbreak by any chance? No. It's a 90s movie, but that's the kind of monkey. It's called a capuchin or some people pronounce it differently, but it's small. It was crazy too. Its name was Chico. Okay.

Yeah. And he would like look at you and he would like put his hand out because he had to be in like a large cage inside of another cage. And he would like go like this and then you and he'd grab you by the hand and try to pull you in and like bite you and he would throw piss at you and stuff. Oh my God. The only person he liked was my mother. Did your stepdad have a good job?

Yeah. Well, yeah, he was a mechanic and he was a printer for a long time. And then he went and worked at my aunt and uncle's auto shop. They owned an auto shop on the other side of the city. And he worked there until they just sold after 60 years in business. Yeah.

So...

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no, we weren't close. We're way closer now. Um, you know, as the age means less and less, you know, she's, uh, she just turned 30. Um,

So I was, she was always like a pain in the ass. Wow, you're 40 now? Yeah. Bro, you look great for 40. Holy shit. I'm 39. Dude, you look good for 39. Well, thank you. I was worried too. Yeah, it's like me, bro. I can't really grow facial hairs. Oh, I can't at all. You have that same problem? Yeah, I could grow like what you have now. Oh, dude. I can't get on the sides. I grew it out for like months and I was like, this is ridiculous. Everyone was laughing at me over Christmas. They're like, what are you doing?

I was like, this just looks bad. I said, I know. I've learned later in life it's a good trait to have. In prison it wasn't, but now it's a good trait to have. I would have struggled. Dude, it works for me because people think I'm a lot younger than me. Yeah, youth is the thing, man. I hate getting carded in every bar that I don't know the people at. See, I like it. When I get carded, I'm like, thank you. I'm flattered. Yeah, but then I've got to bring my ID in, and if I don't have it on me, I don't know, it's just frustrating. Yeah, believe me, when you're actually trying to do something, it's frustrating, but...

I'm like, yeah, hey, oh, spray paint? Yeah, here's my ID. Thank you. How would people describe you as a kid? I was kind, friendly. People who knew me closer would say I was kind of nutty. I was kind of crazy. I did a lot of stupid things. I tried to be a kind person. My mother really instilled with the animals and stuff to be kind of a kind person.

So that really rubbed off on me a lot. Did people make fun of you for the animals? Yes. People who knew. People who didn't, I just got made fun of because I was just a white kid in the hood. So, like, I even kind of make a joke these days, like, I understand racism. Believe me. You know, like, I experienced, you know, because normally people don't say that, but.

It was difficult in the hood being a little – and I'm not much bigger than I was. I was much – actually, I was much smaller. So I got – I did get picked on a lot, which kind of made – put me in situations where I had to, you know, had to make it. I had to survive that.

But I remember one time with the animals, I had all my friends have like lived with us at one point or another. I got like three core friends from childhood that are still around and they've all lived with me. And the one kid was living with me and we were outside of my house. And another kid from another neighborhood was coming by. They knew each other. And he said,

That house right there? He goes, they do animal experiments in there. And the kid that I was with, he like started laughing. And we kind of knew like, he goes, they don't do animal experiments in there. But so that was like the rumor of the neighborhood is the animal experiment place. But people would like throw dogs over our fence, throw boxes of kittens everywhere.

It was crazy. We had an 18-foot Burmese python. Was it a big property, a big house? No, no. It was a city house, just a small. Like the whole basement was full of cats in individual cages, litter boxes, all individual. My mother would be down there every night cleaning, changing, feeding, you know, taking animals every day to vet appointments and stuff. It was like different. It was iguanas and birds and wildflowers.

At one point we had 18 dogs in the house.

It was like, it was, it was a lot. Did you have plans for your future? Say when you were in high school, were you thinking about that? Yeah. I, I, I thought like everyone my age, I thought I was going to be a rap star. I did. And, and so, so I didn't care about anything, you know, like I, I, I could care less. Like I was going to make it and it didn't matter. So I put a lot of time and effort into that. Other people were pushing me to go in like the tech direction and,

because I had a run with early on computing and stuff. And so that's where I should have gone. And like the little college that I dabbled around in was in programming and stuff. But no, I thought in the end, I just thought I was going to rap and make a million dollars and sit in my Rolls Royce and laugh at everyone. It didn't go that way, did it? No, it didn't pan out at all. See, what I figured out eventually was...

You know, you can make the music, but you got to do something with it. I'm like, yeah, I'm just waiting for the phone to ring. I used to get drunk and call Rough Rider's office. Like, just like there was like a woman on the answering machine. And I'm like, oh, listen, listen.

You got to listen. You guys need a white boy, and it's going to be me. I just thought, you know, someone's going to call DMX is going to call me back one of these days. Hey, at least you got dreams, man. I did. Oh, it was big. It was like, that's what I thought. I like dedicated my whole life to that. And it was just, you know what it is. You know, it's not what everyone thinks it is. And that's what I've learned going on is that like,

It's not – you can have talent. Talent's fine, whatever. But it's definitely about the image. It's about the whole thing. It's about the social – which wasn't really – social media wasn't really –

It's like you had a MySpace maybe, you know. Yeah, it's all optics in this entertainment business. Right. Any type of entertainment. Exactly. I saw an interview with some lady and she's like, oh, talent's got nothing to do with it. She's like, are you marketable? You know, is what you're doing marketable? If it's not, then you're not for us, you know. And so I guess that's what we had. We had the drive. I would like to think we had the talent, but it never really panned out.

Did you end up graduating high school? I did. I graduated high school. I did. Um, and I did one semester at college and that failed miserably. Oh, it was so bad. Like math was never my thing. And, um, I took the, you know, the exam to where they're going to place you. And, um, it was general studies, which could lead in a camera. I can't remember what the computer was, some sort of coding class or pipeline. And, uh,

I scored so bad on the math. They started me in remedial math class. And the first class of remedial math was recognizing whole numbers. So like one, two, three, these are whole numbers. And I was like, damn, I really did bad on that one. And you needed like a trig class to do coding and all this stuff. And I was just like, there's no way I can do this. So I didn't really go any further than that. And then into the workforce. Cool.

What was your first big boy job? The real actual job was a pizzeria when I was 18, my uncle's pizzeria. And that was just a lot of fun. Did you actually make the pizzas? Yeah, I made pizzas, wings, all that stuff. I feel like that's such a good trait to have. I learned how to make pizzas. See? And that gets you into a lot of doors because it's a limited talent. Right. Not everyone could do it. You got to know. And we kind of had like a specialty. I know you guys out here have kind of had like large pizzas, kind of specialties.

from New York City's like big, you know, but we had like the biggest slices in Rochester. So it was like a big deal. We were open till two o'clock in the morning. So like, it was like a big place to go. Midnight line would be out the door for big slices. So that was cool. Where would you say your life first started to take a negative turn?

Oh, definitely when I was like 12, when I started with computers, that's when I kind of got into like criminal activity. I was do, do little dumb shit in the streets and stuff. But it was doing computer crime was where I was like, and there was never any consequence. So I was like, oh, this is like, this is not really illegal what we're doing here. But I started doing computer crime and I was like,

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I remember the AIM. Mine was Dirt Biker for Life 95. Was it? My first ever screen name was KZKHS97. And I don't know why I remember that. But then that was like the free trial that you get on AOL. And shortly after that, like the free trial ended and I never paid. My parents never paid for it again. But I had AOL from 98 until 2006.

by nefarious means with accounts and stuff. And that was like, it was like a big deal.

And so I did that like kind of the whole time until I got into like real actual trouble, the paperwork trouble. And that's kind of – but it was a mix. It was – there was a lot of programming, coding, HTML websites, Visual Basic, C, Delphi, like the old stuff that's like antiquated now. But that's where I kind of got started and then –

That turned into identity theft and, you know, like. At 12 or was that later on? That was probably, no, that was probably start of 12, 13, 14. How would you steal someone's identity? Well, the easiest way would be we would take code, like rip code right from AOL's web pages. So you can get like kind of the outlook or, you know, the way the site would look and

And you would make a burner page on like Angel Fire or GeoCities. I don't know if you remember those. It was just like a free thing where you could host your own site. And so you'd get one of those. Then you'd get a redirect to like CJB.net and you'd make like AOL password update dot CJB.net. And it would be like a duplicate AOL site. And when they would say, we just need your old credit card information and an updated backup.

and you would spam that all night and wake up and your email would just be full of people's cards. How do you get people's email to send that to? You would go to, well, your screen name was your email address. So what was yours? Dirtbikerforlife95. And at AOL.com. So if you were in a chat room, you would have a program that would go and collect chat rooms. And all it would do is go in the chat room, collect every name in there, leave, go in the chat room, collect. So you'd have a thousand screen names there.

and then spam those all night. And back then, spam websites didn't look like spam. Like now you can easily kind of... Oh, yeah, there was no... Everything looks similar. Yes, and just that method and everything wasn't really like... It wasn't popular. You know, like the new scammers that are calling... Like I get 50 scam calls a day because I ask for hand jobs and shit all the time. It's real bad. But they would have loved to have that kind of, you know, thing back then because it was just like...

It was serious, man. And it didn't mean anything. When I was a kid, I was just like, whatever. That's like the only crime I really feel bad about. So what would you do with their identity then? We would actually trade those like currency. So I would have a file of a thousand people's information and just trade it with other people for three-letter screen names or, you know, all lowercase screen names that were cool. We'd call them leets.

So like if you would get Ian Bick, it would just Ian Bick and you would try to get names like that or G unit. I remember everyone was trying to get for a long time. And in the shorter they got was like even like three letters. Then eventually people had to two character screen names. It was cool. But how does that translate into money or.

Or it doesn't at that point. That part really doesn't. So you weren't looking to make money. No, no. But we would card stuff. Like I had a digital camera, which was crazy at the time because there was no like preview screen or anything, but it took like 350 pictures and you just plug it in your computer and it was like,

look at this. I can take as many pictures as I want. You know, they were terrible. It looked like Roblox, you know, but, but it was like, it was cool to have. Yeah. I was going through my old digital camera from like eighth or ninth or 10th grade. What? Yeah. And we just took all the, all the sleepovers and stuff. We just took all these photos. This is before there was phones. Quality was,

crazy too right the iPhone just came out but no one really had it you know yeah oh yeah for sure this was like the infancy of digital photography and the cloud and all of that oh shit cloud wasn't even like because every time you switched from a new phone you would have to download those photos manually and it was always a big ordeal I never did that I just reset every time just reset and it was that right and now I have like 20,000 photos on my phone oh yeah I actually was just pulling videos from my cloud last night and it was like 18,000 pieces of media I was like

Oh, my God. It's crazy how it adds up. It does add up. And that was like my first good computer had a six gigabyte hard drive. Like, what is that? I just downloaded a video that I was editing that was six gigs. Like that would have took up my entire computer. Yeah. But so, no, that never really translated to money.

You could there was a lot of people that made a lot of money as kids doing that but um, we would just buy dumb shit We had cds and concert tickets because they would at the time I think it was ticket master. They would even or email They would mail the tickets like in an envelope to your house So we would just have them delivered to an abandoned house on the street just in the mailbox and concert tickets and you could sell those and stuff but um

No, I was more interested in like the screen names and stuff. And, you know, people at school would be like, oh, can you card me this website or that website? Or I say, you do whatever you want. Here's 15 cards. So that was like where I got in. And the people who I was with eventually, they ended up like the whole Paris Hilton thing. They were like crazy.

involved that was like a direct connection to myself and people that I was with so that was like a big deal that was like FBI secret service shit did they come see you no I got I had my case like at the time so when I started seeing all that happen I was like

I got to get out of here. So I kind of stopped dealing with it. And by the time I came back, the people were in prison. Like the one, the one dude's pretty famous now, um, Camo. He was like, he was like a genius, a whiz kid. Like he, I remember he was 14 years old. People were afraid of him. Like adults were like afraid. Um, but he was like the man and he kind of had a lot to do with that. And I think he ended up doing fed time multiple times for, um,

Computer related stuff. So I got so I was in like all this crazy shit and And so I got out of that once I got like a serious case outside of there I was like I can't fuck around when you first started doing this would you have considered yourself a criminal? No, I didn't think so then my parents they got like they got me like a kind of we had like a cheap computer at the house and they're like, oh he loves the computer he's I think so they bought me they spent like 2,000 bucks is a big deal and

on this six gigabyte. The gaming one. No, I wish it was. It was just like a fucking basic ass computer, but it was. Oh yeah, computers were expensive back then. Yeah, exactly right. They were like flat screens. The price, most things don't go down in price. Flat screens and computers go down. Oh yeah, you could get a desktop for 200 bucks now. Yeah, that was like, oh, y'all know, 2000 bucks got you six gigabytes in a,

and a CD writer, you know, and it was like, we can write CDs now. It was a big deal. No. So they were like, I'll get them off the streets. I was selling weed a little bit. The guy who was, uh, who we were selling for came to the house looking for money one day and they were like, what the fuck? So like, let's get them off the street. And, and they're like, look, he's loves it. And it was, the computer was downstairs in the middle of the room and everyone's just like, he's just on the computer all the time. And it was all bad. Yeah.

Yeah, it was real bad. Yeah, computers have really progressed. I'm a big Lord of the Rings fan. I was trying to play the old game and it doesn't even work on the new computers. Yeah, because it's the outdated processor. No, no, no, sir. So my brother found one like Black Sights or whatever online where you can download the game and it runs it or whatever. Right, right. So it worked out, but I spent $150 on the CD from Amazon. I'm like, oh, shit.

We have to make this work. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So that was like – but no, I would have not considered myself a criminal then. It was just – it was computers. It was nothing. It was numbers on a notepad, you know, on a Microsoft document. It didn't seem like crime to me. Let's be real. If you use nicotine, why settle for something outdated?

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And that's when I got in like the most trouble I ever got in my entire life. How old were you? Was this before college? Yes. Yeah, I was 16. And we moved and I was like, I was an angry person after we moved. I didn't understand, you know, I didn't understand that moving out of the city was like,

the best thing that could have happened, especially the way the neighborhood and just everything went, like they could see before I could that this was not good. So they bought a house literally in the middle of nowhere. And I'm used to being like urban environment. There's a corner store here. There's a corner store there. I know everybody. The neighborhood is crazy to where a farmhouse in on 16 acres is

And there's just nothing around. Town is an hour and a half walk in one direction, you know, like to go to Jubilee, a little grocery store that like, you know, it was like in the middle of nowhere. So I was like very mad. I was like an angry person over that. And I think it kind of like made me like aggressive because I started to school out there.

And at the third week, they gave me in-school suspension, which I didn't know what that was. I was getting in all these like altercations. I never got an actual fight there, but it was like all these almost fights. And they were like, oh, you want to be a fighter, huh? Big tough guy, huh? They were like, ISS, you suspended five days. I was like, yes. I was like, ISS on my birthday. I was like, that's going to be – or suspension on my birthday. That's going to be great.

Because I thought I had to week off. And they're like, all right, well, the bus picks you up on Monday and you go to this other school. Oh, it was a separate school for the ISS? Yeah. We just had a room like the size of this and all facing a wall. Yeah. And the teachers would always forget to give you work. So you're just sitting there doing nothing. Oh, I learned fast. So it kind of ties in later where I ended up going to school after they asked me to leave this public school. Wow.

was the old high school in the district that a church had bought. And they opened up a Christian school in there. So I would see these other kids like going through the hall while I'm at this newly found ISS. And I'm like watching everybody like, hmm, look at them. They're all wearing uniforms and stuff like that's weird. And I'm in here with all these maniacs, which was terrible. And a guy that he was a nice dude, too. I wish I could remember his name. He took me outside. He's like probably the third day in. He's like, why are you here?

He's like, you seem like a normal dude. He's like, you see what's going on in there. These guys are nuts. I said, I don't know. I'm just not getting along out here, you know? And, uh, so I came back. I was there for like two more days after ISS, the worst week of my life. Not really, but it was, it sucked. And then, uh,

And they were like, you can't come here anymore. Like, you're a problem. We've been down here multiple times daily for the first three weeks of school. They said, you got to find somewhere else for this kid to go.

So my mother found out about this Christian school. And I think I remember here, you said you went to a really small school. A Montessori school. It was at, they said like 30 kids in one room. Even less. It was like 12, 15 kids, but fourth through eighth grade. Mine was K through 12, 30 kids, maybe 40 at the max. We were all in one room and it was like one or two other rooms that we could leave. So I understand that. Very, very small. And, um,

I ended up going there. It was like the best thing ever. It really was. It was awesome people. They were like, no, come on. Let's learn about this. And that's where I learned about a lot of religion. And I still totally fucked up. But... So tell us what happens. What gets you into trouble? So... A friend... I met a friend through another friend. A friend that I grew up with from fifth grade. He went to a foster home. The foster home was...

was these great people in the town of Brockport. And they're awesome, just a beautiful family. And they had a bunch of kids of their own and they had other kids. They would take in, you know, kids from the city and do a foster program. So my friend that I grew up with introduced me to one of their kids. His name was AJ. Him and I hit it off like,

All we did was spend time together. We were like inseparable. And he was driving at the time I wasn't. And he would drive out. It was about a 40-minute drive from his house to our house. So he was like my saving grace, someone I could hang out with. And he would come pick me up and we would go do stuff. And we were just like best friends. And he died. And our last interaction together was just wasn't good. You know, I don't – I feel kind of –

Our last interaction ended up with me saying that I couldn't be friends with him anymore. And I didn't mean that, but I just wanted him to think that what we were, he was kind of involved in that it would make him lose something. And, and I didn't mean that. And yeah.

And he would call me collect because it was technically long distance. And like not a lot of people had like free long distance. So that night when he left and I said, I can't I can't I can't be friends with you anymore. He called me from a mutual friend of ourselves. And I can still hear the collect calls. Kyle, call Ed's. And I remember saying, I'll call tomorrow. And he died. And it like broke my heart. I'm still like heartbroken over that moment.

And and I had never experienced that before. You know, my great great grandmother died at one point, but never anyone like that. And it was like my whole world fell out from under me. And so funeral, you know, all that. And I'm like completely heartbroken. And a week later, his brother, who is I'm closer to an age now.

He said, we're doing a remembrance party for AJ. And, you know, I want you to go. I think it would be a good time for you to go to. So we hooked up and went. And it was like out in the middle of, they called it the sand pits. But he was like driving through the woods. They like pulled into an Aldi's parking lot and then like drove off of the parking lot and then drove into these woods. And then it was a clearing and it was like a massive bonfire set up. And I got there early.

It was like two o'clock in the afternoon. That shit went crazy. I didn't have them boys knew how to party. So I'm wasted. I was like drinking heavily and, um, people started fighting. They were like, and I'm like, this is not what this is for. So I was like trying to break up fights and stuff. And, um,

Because I was there because I was hurt. And, you know, this is supposed to be a good thing. There's hundreds of people there. They're driving in kegs on four wheelers and shit. I had never, never seen anything like this. I was like, wow, huge fire. And I had a rap battle. Like they were like, this guy raps. And they were like, you guys should battle. So I like killed this dude. It was a, it was good. And all the paperwork out there was like, Kyle was great.

And not literally. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, not him. And it was so I was like the man. And then everyone's like, that's AJ's best friend right there. He's you know, so I was like I was feeling cool at this party. So I was like trying to be this mediator. Oh, no, come on. Let's not fight. And now it's real late. And someone was fighting or starting. And I pointed at this dude.

And he, all I could see was like a white shirt. You know, it's like, I can't even tell you midnight maybe. And I just pointed at like what I could see. It was like a light colored shirt. I was like, is it him? Is it him that's fighting? And this dude didn't like that. He like, didn't like that. I pointed at him. He started going crazy. And he's like, next thing you know, I'm pointing at someone. Then he's screaming in my face. He's like, scream, going nuts. And then he said, you know what? And he spits right in my face. And now there's, now there's a crowd.

And I'm like, all these people just thought I was so cool. And now this dude just spit right in my face. And I remember I wiped my face off. And I said, if you fucking spit in my face again. And he said, you spit in my face again. And I wiped it off again. And the crowd's getting bigger. And I, fuck. Now this is where I was, I messed up. And I used to tell different versions of the story to make myself not look as bad. And I was always worried about repercussions and

But this is kind of, I told this on my show too, but this is, so I pulled the box cutter, a utility knife out of my pocket and I put it on the side of his head and he couldn't even see it because he was so close to me. I said, if you fucking spit in my face one more time and he spit directly in my open mouth and all I could taste was beer and I just, I lit him up. I cut him right across his face.

And then he grabbed his face and went back and nobody knew what happened. I think a lot of people thought I slapped him. And then once it became apparent that that's not what happened, then other people started. I just got my ass beat. People just started coming in. So I just started trying to cut everybody. And so this is kind of it seems it sounds terrible, right? That's what I used to say. Like he punched me.

I mean, he did spit on me multiple times and in my mouth, which is like probably as disrespectful as you can get kind of. But that I fucked up. And I remember this. So this is this is where it's kind of a weird story. It was like the weird how things happen. The second person who got cut in the face, he his his cut like went here and then stopped here and then started back up.

And where it stopped was his jugular vein. And the third person that got cut was this, he didn't have anything to do with it. He wasn't trying to hurt me. He was trying to help me. So sorry to you, man. I always wanted to say, I was sorry. My lawyer said I couldn't, I cut him down his fingers, down his hand, but his hand was wrapped. Sorry. His hand was wrapped around this dude's neck, trying to pull him off of me. And so the razor came down his face and over his fingers and,

So if he wasn't trying to help me, I probably would have killed the guy who got it, the second person who got cut. So I get stomped out. They like stopped me relentlessly. And I understand now, you know, I was like a, I was, I was an unknown there, you know, like I didn't know anybody but AJ's brother and his friend Ryan, like as all the people I knew there. And, um,

So they they stomped the piss out of me and I kept trying to get up and leave and they're chasing me further and further in the woods. And I finally got away and I crawled into this pricker bush like I was I lost my shoe and shit. And I was like, all right, I got to think if it's difficult for me to get in here, it'll be difficult for people to get in here. So at least I'll be able to like maybe have time to get out of the back of this bush or wherever I was climbing. It was pitch black. Now I'm in the woods.

And I threw up all over myself. And then I kind of fell asleep, I think, for like half an hour, an hour. And then I woke up. I couldn't hear anything else. I was like, I got to get out of here. I got to find out where I am. I'm all beat up. I got nothing in my pockets. I got slammed on my head. I'm walking. I hear these people talking. I'm like in the side somewhere. And they're like, who are you? And no one knows. Everyone's scattered. I ruined the party like 100%. It was a bad thing. And...

And this guy's like, who is that? And I'm like, who are you? I'm scared. I'm not trying to have part two happen. I don't know. Again, my sissy ass doesn't have a knife anymore. And I'm like, oh, so he goes out, whatever. Just let him go. And I seen the guy had this cup. It was like a boob.

And I go, is that titty cup? And he's like, yeah. He was pouring people liquor shots out of this cup that looked like a boob all night. This kid Scott. And I go, I remember you. And he's like, oh, come on. He's like, what the hell happened? I was like, I don't know what happened. I was like, people said I did something that I didn't. I was like, I got to get out of here. I got beat up. So they get me out to the parking lot. I get picked up.

But like, I'm trying to call people. I don't know who to call. I didn't know this at the time. I'm covered in blood. It was like, it looked ridiculous. It was blood everywhere. So this dude says, I'll give you a ride as long as you weren't the one who did it. And I was like, oh, I didn't do anything. I was like, I didn't do anything. Give me a ride. And he's like, yeah, right up front. And I'm like, nah, let me ride in the back. I was like, I'm hurt. I need to lay down.

i end up getting blood all over his car he tried to sue me later i swear man they said you let him in your car that's your own bad this is kind of funny but so he drops me off at these apartments

Where I started the night at the apartments in Brockport, I meet up. There's Jake. There's AJ's brother. He's like, what is going on? Walking through the parking lot. I go, dude, I don't know. Where's my other shoe? He's like, what are you talking about? He's like, I said, these are Pauly shoes. I was like, I lost one of them because they're like size 10 and a half or something. They didn't fit me. I just needed something to wear. He's like, you don't, I don't think you know what's going on, man. He was like,

Next thing you know, a sheriff comes pulling in the parking lot. Jake's gone. I'm like, where'd Jake go? Sheriff pulls by. I didn't even really know how bad I looked, but they pulled by, looked right at me and just kept driving. I go up to this apartment. This dude, Ed, he was at the party. He wasn't supposed to be. He's the one in the paperwork that said, I don't know nothing. And I always said, be like Ed. All of his statements or whatever, he said, I don't know nothing. It was a fight. I got out of there.

He said, I said, dude, I think I'm going to jail. He said, oh, you're fucking definitely going to jail. I was like, I need to use your bathroom. And I'm looking at myself in the mirror and I go, yeah, maybe I did mess up. I called my mom. I said, ma, I think I messed up. She goes, the police are already here. And that's 40 minutes West. She goes, a whole convoy of police pulled in. I said, well, I'm here. They sent, they sent a friend of theirs, this guy, Gary, he died last year. I miss him a lot.

He came out to pick me up and I watch him. He pulls up at the apartment complex. He gets out. He's got a gun behind his back. He thought he was on like a secret agent mission and shit. It was awesome. I get out to the car. He's like, put these clothes on, sweatpants, a shirt. He takes all my clothes, bags them all up, puts them in a trunk. And then we leave. I turn myself in. I had to go to the hospital the next day and the detectives were at the hospital. And then that's when it was like,

That's when now in my mission in life, I try to explain to people about their basic rights, which I had no idea of. And I think these detectives are scumbags because I was 16 years old and they were like, you know what they want a confession out of you. So I'm in the hospital and they're like trying to get this confession out of me.

And, and I'm like, I didn't do it. I just, I thought maybe if I just lied enough that all this would go away. Like I thought the whole time I didn't think anything was going to happen. I stabbed these people. I thought, I thought I was just going to be nothing. Like I would go home and be like, damn, that was a crazy night. I didn't realize how bad I really messed up. So as soon as they discharged me at the hospital, it was like immediately discharged or like, all right,

Well, you're under arrest, you know, for two first degree assault and one second degree assault. I'm like, OK. And I didn't really know. I like I have no idea what's going on next. You know, this is a first for me. And he's like, well, we can do this the easy way or hard way. Keola, he's a cock. And he said, I said, well, what's what's what's what's the easy way? He's like, we.

cuff you in the front we walk out of here like gentlemen and I was like well what's the hard way he's like I break your arm we stay here a little longer and then I cuff you and then we get out of here and I'm like all right well we'll just do the easy way then they take me to get food I'm they uncuff me we go on it's in the thing which is crazy they take me to a deli and get me a sub right I'm under arrest with two major crimes detectives and I'm getting us ordering a sub and

And they were right. They wrote it all down and shit. I don't know what that had anything to do with anything. You think they were trying to butter you up or something? I think so. And don't that you need a parent with you? Right. You would think so. I thought so. I didn't. That's why. And there's like all kinds of stuff in there. Like, I didn't even realize like they were standing around in the hallway at one point just listening, writing down what I was talking with people about.

And I didn't realize, like, obviously, I know better now that everything you say can and will be used against you. Apparently, that was everything. And they're constantly writing notes and wrote down like he got a ham sub with with cheese and lettuce and he got a Pepsi and all this shit. Yeah.

No parents nothing take me down to a substation I got cuffed to an eye hook in like this cell and I think they just wanted me to like This is what it's gonna be like and they closed me in a cell and I was like fuck this is beat and uh

So we're going back and forth and I thought maybe if I just lie, if I just tell him so many different lies, like even at one point I said like I had a flaming bush, like a flaming thing I was swinging around from out of the fire. Totally ridiculous. Not what happened at all. I was like, I'm just going to have this thing. Maybe if I lie enough, they won't be able to get to the bottom of it. You know, I was like, no, that's exactly not what happened. And he's like, can we do a written statement from you? And I was like, okay, sure.

So he gets all the stuff together to do the written statement and he pulls out the, pulls out the two finger guns, starts typing like this. And I'm like, Oh, we're going to be here a long time. And I said, I'll, how about I just type it? I said, I'll type my statement. I'll type everything that happened. He said, no, I can't let you do that. And I said, then I think I needed an attorney. He's like, does that mean you don't want to talk about this anymore? I said, yeah, yeah. And then, so that's where the paperwork ended. Um,

I had to get a, you know, who is the best lawyer in Rochester now? He was the man. I got a lawyer. He kicked back several plea offers and I ended up pleading to two second degree assaults with, what the hell was it? Five years probation restitution rehab as a sentence. And the offers before that, I feel like I should have just went with like the one year sentence.

because like probation made me a junkie like probation kicked off my drug and alcohol abuse because I smoked a lot of pot and drank a little bit here and there kid shit you know and uh once I got on probation intensive supervision felony probation I was like well I gotta get high somehow how am I gonna live without figuring you know how to get high so I uh

I asked the rehab, I was like, well, I can you show me my test results? I said, my dad doesn't believe me that I'm off drugs. He said, oh yeah, you're, you know, all my, all my tests are good. So I had to sign this paper and shit. And they gave me a whole list of everything they tested for. And I was like, oh, they don't test for pills. They don't test for all that. I was like, oh yeah, I could definitely get Vicodin. I could get all. So that's where that started. And, uh, well,

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So then a pill problems and... Why didn't you get expelled from your high school for that? Right. Because yeah, most people I talked to, if you have outside conduct like that, you'd be expelled. Right. And they knew all about it. They were actually... The judge said to my lawyer that the only reason he didn't send me to do whatever they saw fit was because of the letters from my teachers at school. And all they did was...

Because it happened at the end of May, like the last day of May. So there was a couple weeks left in June for school. They gave me a packet to take home to finish out the year because there were death threats and they said they were going to kill me. And so they were worried about death threats coming to the school and –

So I finished out school at home for the last two weeks and then started my senior year the following school year. How did people react to you when you started the new school? Oh, the next year? Everyone acted like nothing had happened. It was like... So that summer actually helped you? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Everyone was cool. That school was like, they really care about kids.

And everyone there really cared about what happened. And they liked me. And I liked them. And so they were like, they accepted me back with open arms and were just like. And, you know, in Christianity, like self-defense. And that's kind of where I was wrong, where I was trying to play the self-defense thing. And the judicial system was like, no, no.

This is not self-defense. Even when I was lying and saying like, oh, they hit me, they jumped me. I did this to get out of it. My lawyer said, oh no, we're not doing self-defense. You don't want to take this to trial. He said, I've seen the pictures. You're not taking this to trial.

But where I was going with that is, you know, just defending the fort is like, you know, in Christian religion is like a thing, you know, like you can defend yourself and your family if you have to. So so the story that I was kind of going with kind of fell in line with I was defending myself when I was kind of ashamed that I just wanted to be a gangster, I think. What happened to the kids that you cut?

The one who got it the worst, he ended up suing me and won. And the one who got it the second worst, the other guy who got cut in the face, he didn't have insurance. So he was the restitution. And I think the last kid didn't press charges or he didn't pursue me civilly, but the charges were taken by the state.

So they charged me because that's why I was to first degree. And then the second degree assault was for his hand. I don't think I don't think he pressed. But I'm not sure it's all in the shit. I can't remember if he did or not. I know he was on my side. Did their families want you to go to jail? Oh, yeah. But I think they also wanted a cash grab and they didn't think I would be any good as a cash grab person.

doing 10 years. Have you paid off the restitution? Yeah. It was like, it was like 1500 bucks or $2,000. That's it? Yeah. Something like that. But then he sued me and won for, um, 185,000. So what happens to that money? It just lapsed. Oh, that's it's all done now? It's done. It lapsed. It was nine years. Then they had to re-up it after nine years and he never re-upped it. And

It's kind of hard to get blood from a stone. Yeah. And at the time I didn't, I didn't have any, I had like a regular job, a factory job and shit. But yeah, it was definitely difficult to, there was like nothing to have. They tried to sue my, my parents, the homeowner's insurance. Homeowner's insurance says, well, he doesn't live with his father. So you can't sue them. They said, no, he doesn't. That's not his residence. My stepfather owned the house that I lived in.

But I'm not adopted by him. So his homeowner's insurance said, you know,

wherever they tried to sue the beverage place that had that the kegs came from and they're like we don't have any record of this kid buying a keg here because i didn't they're like stick it up your ass so they just sued me and i went to a um a lawyer's meeting my criminal defense attorney sent me to a civil attorney and he was cool he said this is the best piece of 75 advice that you're ever gonna get he's like don't show up don't go to don't go to court

I said, that sounds counterintuitive to what I'm doing here. And he's like, you're going to lose. You pled guilty. You already said you did this. You're going to lose. He said, I could take you for 10,000. We could go to every single one of these. He said, you're going to lose because you already pled guilty. He said, just don't go. See what happens. And that was it. And then the kid, he died like 10 years ago.

unrelated but now is this off your record now because it happened as a juvenile um to a certain extent because the marine corps was like oh because i tried to i tried to be a marine when my life was like in the shitter i was like maybe that's what i need you know a good friend of mine was a marsat guy and he's like you need to come this is where you need to be

I was like, yeah, they need like people who are like hardcore. And I thought, and they were like, oh, they pulled up everything. They're like, no, no, sir. So I, I don't know. I mean, I've never had an issue. I've never run into anything that it stopped me from doing aside from the Marine Corps. But, um, no, it didn't really affect me too much. So I'm not, I'm not sure. I mean, it's in there somewhere. They found it. They pulled it up. Um,

But as far as like, I don't know. That's a good question. Before this happened, would you have considered yourself a violent person? Yeah, kind of. Not like violent, like...

I know violent people who would fight a lot. And since I was kind of the small one of our group, I always felt like I ended up always fighting. Whether win or lose, it was like for somehow or another, I always was the one that ended up fighting. And then we all would fight after, but I was always like the person in the middle of it.

I think I wanted to be, you know, does that make sense? Like I always wanted to be the tough guy because I was just a little nothing, you know. Did your relationship with your parents and stepdad change after this incident? No, no. My parents, everybody, my family is like super loving and accepting. And I mean, they were like...

This – we are only helping you with this, so this better be the last fucking shit that you're in. I was like, oh, it will be. But then, of course, I started being a drug dealer after that. I thought I was going to be a drug dealer. So –

I never got in trouble for that, but given the circumstances and everything that I had already been through, I probably should have not done that. But that's what I decided to do. As soon as I was off probation, I was buying weed from somebody. Now, I'm off of pills. At that point, I think I was off of alcohol for a year. And I was like, oh, time to get my weed back. I'm going to fucking do it.

And a buddy of mine at work was like, why are you buying – you're from the city. You know people, right? Why are you buying weed, this dirt weed off of this dude? He's like, why don't we just start selling weed and you can smoke weed for free? I was like, that sounds like a fucking great idea. So do you think if this never happened, you never would have got addicted to pills? Yes, 100%. Yeah. I worked that whole probation system like to my advantage. And I made it just so I could use drugs and drink the whole time. Like I figured out all of their –

things that they would say were random that I learned weren't. When the officers would figure out that I was like a normal, like easygoing person, I would always get given to the rookies. So you could tell when there was like a new hire because I would get a new probation officer and they're new and they're always by the book. And I did the full five. So I went through a bunch of people.

And the one she was like real weak and she told me all kinds of stuff that she wasn't supposed to. And so it just helped me be, you know, a degenerate even more. And especially that I knew like I was high on pills standing there in the office, bugged out and I'm pissing for cocaine and marijuana.

You know, and I've never done blow. And you never got violated? No. And one time I was supposed to, which is kind of weird. We had a call-in number. Did you have to do any? Yeah, you would call in for the drug test. Call in and see if they'll ruin your weekend. You know, Super Bowl Sunday. You call in Friday. They're like, call back Sunday. Oh, yeah. Okay. So I'd have to call in Friday. And-

Apparently I missed it and I really didn't mean to. So I showed up to my appointments at that time. I was like halfway in there every two weeks because I went from like twice a week to once a week and then every two weeks and then once a month. And I went to my appointment and he was like, you missed your call in. I said, no, I never missed my call. I didn't call my number. And he's like, it's right here. It says you missed the call in. I said, well, call the message is still the same.

So he calls, puts it on speakerphone, he calls and my number wasn't on there, but it was the fucking week before the message had changed the week, you know, since. So there was a new message without my number. And he goes, that's interesting. Your number is not on there. And I was like, but it was the apparently I got called the week before and I just didn't go.

Which I would never I wouldn't not do that. But I must have fucked up. But I was again, I was on drugs and alcohol. I was I had a big problem. So I'm sure I just forgot to call. And but he said he had the violation written up. And I was like, oh, shit. But that didn't pan out.

So tell us about your addiction, how bad that got. It was bad. I had like – I got like a weird organizational thing. So I had like all these little individual bottles with like the names and milligrams of –

different hydrocodone and, and not even so much like the, you know, they have seven fives, fives, tens, whatever. But they also have an acetaminophen rating as well. So some of them would be like 325, 500 or, or more. So they were all individuals. So I was just like heavy into taking any kind of pills that I could find. And it made me like, I couldn't do anything without doing that.

And I was, for a good portion of it, I was an alcoholic too. And alcohol actually was probably the worst thing for me. As I was saying about it in there, like it's sort of been a bad time. If not, I was just a degenerate drunk. And in March, I'll be 17 years sober. Oh, congrats, man. Yeah, thank you. And that was a big deal. That was like the worst thing for me was alcohol. That was like...

I couldn't do anything. And I thought I could do everything when I was drunk. And so now I'm on probation drinking. And the last night I drank, I was at the local mall. We went to the Danbury Mall. It was kind of similar. I'm walking through there. Do you remember Sparks? No. It was like an energy drink, alcohol drink.

And it was like when they got banned, like for a local from being an energy drink and an alcohol, but it was some similar to that. I was walking through the local mall, just like wasted drinking alcohol. Like that's, that's, you can't do that. And I'm on probation and doing this dumb shit. And, and, uh, I, I thought I was going to run out into the road and end my life. Cause I was drunk and mad. My cousins were there. It was that Taco Bell. It was all stupid. And, uh,

I was like, I'm going to run into traffic. And I couldn't get up this hill. It was all snowy and shit. It looked ridiculous. And I was like, I can't do this anymore. Obviously, I don't have control of myself. So I quit drinking. And then eventually I quit pills. I stopped doing pills. I didn't quit, which is kind of a strange wordplay with me. But if I say I quit something, like I'm done. But I just kind of stopped doing pills. And I had like a small relapse when my son was born.

And, uh, I don't really remember the first month of his life cause something happened that really upset me. And, uh, after that I was like, I quit, I'm never doing this again. And, uh, so then I'll be a 13 year, well, January, I was 13 years drug free and, um,

Yeah. So, so drugs and alcohol were like the worst thing that ever happened to me. If I would have just done the year in County, I probably, I, I would got to assume I would never have been, uh, addicted to anything. You know, a lot of people say, I hear it a lot too. It's the disease, the disease. I don't, I don't, I'm not, I don't believe that. Um,

What do you think it is then if it's not? I think it's, if anything, it might be a mental illness. But I, you know, like, and what I say is if you were on a deserted island, you know, if I was born on an island, would I be addicted to, you know, hydrocodone? No, but I could get cancer. I could, you know, that could happen. That's a disease. You know, I'm not going to get a drug problem on an island. So I think that's like people who want to,

make it seem like, like feel bad for me. This is a disease that I have. No, I chose everything. I was, I had two half milligrams of Anax in my hand. I was taking a piss and I dropped one of them in the toilet full of piss. And it didn't cross my mind at all to just reach in there and just grab it out, kind of shake it off a little water and take it.

And I had a pocket full of them, which is the sad thing. It wasn't like that was the last one. You know, that was my choice. I was like choosing to do this and do all this stuff. I wasn't, it wasn't like...

You know, and I chose to quit. And I chose that, like, this is not good. Yeah, I think addiction has a lot to do with circumstance, environment, and your choices. Because you can be born into a drug-fueled family where your mom is literally giving you or your dad heroin at eight years old. And that's kind of an uncontrollable thing. And you form that addiction. Oh, yeah. And they're doing it.

Or you get into an accident and you get addicted to that. And while all that's going on, you have the mental aspect of, okay, you're depressed or something happened to you or you're going through something traumatic. Right. And that all kind of triggers it. I agree. I don't think like if you look at, say, someone like me, I don't just randomly have a drug addiction tomorrow.

Right. Something is a precursor to that. Whereas you could randomly get a disease tomorrow. You could. Exactly. So I think that's part of it too. And that's what I – and I'm sorry to everyone who thinks they got the disease or, you know, everyone's got their own way of dealing with their addictions and problems. So I think that's kind of just a thing that people – maybe that's what you need to do. Like I was going to meetings and shit when I was –

full on active addiction. And I was listening to all these people like, but I never went to a meeting afterwards. So I like when I got clean, I never went to meetings. I had never been to a meeting where I wasn't on drugs, you know, if that makes sense. In rehab, all that did was just like, again, teach me how to work the system. And rehab didn't do anything. I met cool people at rehab, though. Okay, cool. I started smoking cigarettes in rehab.

which made me start smoking tobacco for 18 years. Like all these things just like led me to do all these other things, which is kind of ridiculous. But, you know, it is a disease in the sense where it's kind of like an epidemic with like the –

Just that when you look at it, the bigger picture, not an individual case by case. It's a disease when you look at all of the people affected by it. Yeah, for sure. That is definitely like, like you said, an epidemic of, and now I can't even imagine, like I would be afraid to do drugs right now just because like, I, you know, I know people that died that are dead because they thought they were doing something that they weren't, you know? And it's like, it's, it's even scary to think. So I'm like glad that I'm like,

Yeah, to me, that's the scariest thing. Like I have friends that like will do cocaine for here and there. And then they'll be like, why don't you just try it once? And I'm going to be like, because I'm going to be that one person where it's laced with fentanyl and I'm dead from it. It just doesn't interest me, you know? The one time I was at like a small gathering and there was some blow going around. And I was like, I'm going to try this because I just reported two days ago. I was like, and I could probably do a little bit. And this was, you know, in 05 or something.

And I was like, I can do this and it'll be out of my 06 maybe. And I was like, I can do this. It'll be out of my system. And I said, let me try some of this. This kid, Josh. And he said, you never did this before? And I said, no. And he said, don't. And I said, really? And he's like, you'll never stop. And I didn't. And then I still, I still never did coke. So like I did a little heroin at one time, like a couple of times, but I never did coke. And I think that was like a real friend move.

Because I had a lot of money at this time in my life because I was living at home. I was selling drugs and I had like a good job. So I could have been the man, you know, by like, go get an ounce. Let's all do blow all night. And everyone knew like I wasn't afraid to spend money. He was like, no, don't do this. Don't do it. You'll regret that. Don't do it. And I don't know if maybe he just knew me better than that. Like how much of I loved alcohol and alcohol.

He said, dude, you drank with us all night and you were the only one not doing powder. I was like, oh, not something to be proud of, but I'd like to drink. What keeps you sober for that long? What are some tools that have helped you along the way on the days you kind of feel like, you know, you wanted to use it? Because I'm sure you had those thoughts. You know what it is? It's kind of corny, but it's my timer.

I like when I went to Las Vegas when I was six months in from not drinking. And that's like not the place to be at when you're trying to quit drinking. And I didn't know that. Not at all. No, I was like, oh, shit. And I was thinking, what's the difference? I'll be six, six months. What's six months? I'll get fucked up. I'll come back. And I was like, no, just stick with it. But I smuggled all kinds of prescription drugs there. But I wasn't drinking.

So it's like my timer. Like if I were to go out there and drink right now, like 17 years, you know, almost 17 or cook done nothing, you know? Um, and those, those kinds of things are what makes them like, I don't want to reset that. What, what a downer that would be to have 17, 13. I think I'm four years off tobacco. Like, and I miss that the most. I miss tobacco the most. Oh man, I miss it. I do. Um,

But resetting those timers is like a big downer to me and I just don't want to experience that. What do you think has been the greatest lesson you've learned from this experience both with addiction and also the incident that happened that night? The greatest lesson I think is jail is real. That is like no – that's no joke. I got super lucky I think.

So that crime is definitely not what it's supposed to be. And, you know, like the people that I met through all of this taught me a lot of lessons throughout. Can I tell you real quick, just a quick kind of small world story? So computer crime. I met a guy back in the, I was 12, I think, or 13. He wasn't a computer criminal. He's a programmer. He was 17, I think, at the time. His name's Jeff.

He would listen to all my 12-year-old questions. How do I do this? How do I do this? You know, how do this coding, coding? How do I do these calls, API calls? How do I do this? And he would always be there teaching me this shit, right? And I lost track of him. You know, we both grew up, whatever. I'm working at this factory building IV pumps, right? I'm working with this dude named Jeremy. Weird dude. I add him on Facebook. And this was probably 07, 08.

Mutual friends, I get a message from somebody that says, this isn't Kyle from Rochester, is it? And I'm reading a name. I'm like, Jeff, dude, this was the guy who taught me how to program when I was 12 years old. These two guys worked together at a stereo shop in New Jersey.

I how to how we came back together through this guy I worked with in another state was crazy and uh and like he owns like Zuka skateboards now he's like a super nice guy all these years later and I said dude you know I've known each other almost like like pushing 30 years and how we got brought back together so the people that I've met through all this kind of criminal behavior and stuff I met a lot of good people and like the people at my school they were all good people and um

And I think you should try to the lessons that you can take from anything and all this stuff is like find good people and keep them around you. Surround yourself with good and positive people and influences, people who who aren't so worried about themselves, but they're worried about you as well. I don't know if that answers the question, but I feel like I've met a lot of people through all of this baloney. Like when I stabbed everybody, I figured my friends' parents would be like,

This is my son's thing. You know, how could you, you know, and they were like, please, what can we do to help you? And they were like, with open arms, we'll get through this together. So I met like all these great people through all these times. And it's not all bad, you know, I guess no matter what's going on in your life, everything's not all bad. There's things that can be taken from everything that are important.

That are good. And my kids help me stay out of trouble now, too. So obviously you watch a show and I'm sure you've heard some of the stories where there are a lot of guests that have stories like yours, but, you know, they end up in prison or jail because of that. Right. Does that how does that make you feel about like the criminal justice system as a whole? It's totally it's terrible. I think I'm and just as as life goes on, like I should have went to prison.

I think I feel like I did. I want to know, you know, but I, I've hurt people really bad. Like I almost killed people. They said the kid was sticking his tongue through his cheek. It was like, it was, it was gruesome. And, and I, I, I know people who have done less that are, you know, some, someone was telling me someone's got five years for stealing a dog. I kind of think maybe that's bullshit. Cause I was like, look what I did. And I didn't,

But I think it just makes people look at the state system where it's very unaligned. Yes. Every, you know, a guy could do a year for something that's way, you know, worse than a guy that did 10 years for something, you know. Oh, yeah. It's a messed up system. You've met people who are, you're like, how much? Well, I think the biggest issue is like sex offenses on the state level. On the feds, it's pretty kind of straightforward where they have the minimums. But like I read in the local people here, even in Danbury and Bethel,

sex offenders getting less time than I got in prison. Oh, yeah. And I think that's insane. No, that's totally nuts. I saw like some meme that was going around. It was like, oh, this is how you solve immigration problem. It was like, tell these people to go out and sex offenders and however many they get, they'll get like, will get instant citizenship. And I was like, I mean, I don't mind the message. Like that's, and with kids myself, there's a sex offender that lives 10 houses down. And

Yeah. I under, yeah. The, the, the guidelines or whatever is totally messed up. Yeah. They need to streamline that across all the states. And I just don't understand like how, how can, how can anybody look at this and say, oh, you did these terrible, like I used to work in a kid's prison actually in industry. I used to do the floors there.

So we'd talk to the guards while we're doing the floors, which is cool. I got to work with all these kids and shit was kind of cool. They were like helping me do carpet cleaning and shit at one point. Yeah, it was, it was cool. Uh, DMX was actually locked up there, which is another little thing. But, uh,

And he was telling me about these disgusting stories. He's like, there's kids in the max unit. He's like, they were pimping their sister out who was like three years old. And they're 16, 17 years old pimping out a three-year-old. And they're going to be, he said, they'll be locked up until they're 18 and it'll be back in the world. And I'm like, what?

that's fucking insanity. That's your little baby sister. Like, it makes you think, dude, it makes me like not trust anybody. Like, um, my kids, uh, I'm very protective of my children. Um,

Um, and they know that. And I try not to be because I want them to be honest with me about everything, you know, so I'm not like some strict whatever. And we, we talk normally to each other. And, uh, so I'm hoping that if there's any kind of any weird behavior anywhere, like they won't be afraid.

that they'll get in trouble, that they'll come to me and say like something weird or I don't like the way so-and-so's dad, you know, whatever, because I just, I'm not very trusting of people, especially some of these terrible stories that I hear. It's nuts.

Well, Kyle, thanks so much for coming on the show today, brother. Thank you, man. Can I say one thing? Of course, man. I know I gave you the shirt. I started this company and stuff. And we'll have the link to that in the bio too. And I appreciate that, which I would never ask for, but I appreciate that you do that and you help a lot of people out. But-

there's a guy bus from machine studio. He took me under his wing. We're in kind of the same thing and he's got to be one of the most positive and influential people I've met thus far. And he is just like a super good dude. And, um, and I don't think I would be where I am in progressing with what I'm doing. Uh, if it wasn't for him. So I'll shout out to him. Shout out to, to bus from machine. So a good guy. What do you have a podcast tip? Yeah. I mean, basically I,

I call it that. And sometimes I have people like come and sit down and we talk, but mainly it's like a journal that I come to every Friday and just talk shit. That's awesome. Talk about my life. And I kind of think like, if anything were to ever happen to me, um,

It's your legacy. Yeah, there's a hundred-something episodes right now that my kids can go back and say, my dad was kind of a weird dude, you know. Well, now we can add this to the list. This is awesome. And everything you got going here. I know everyone tells you this, too, but keep going, man. This is cool. It means a lot, man. You know, that's what we're kind of going for, like the way, you know, when people walk in and we want them to be inspired. Right. I came in, I was like, oh, God, hold on.

Shit, I wasn't... You're like, is that really Ian? Yeah, when I turned the corner, I was like, there he is. He's a real person. So everybody, Ian is a real person. I'm not a catfish. He exists. And I got to... Dude, I'm so happy your dad was here. He's a good man. He is an awesome... The episode with you guys, I'm like...

He is on your team. I feel like everyone should have that experience, like sit down with a parent because that'll live there forever. I get to look back at that. That'll be a conversation. Big time. Playing forever. And I'm so glad I just got to meet him. He's a good man. He likes to come around here more. We've been spending a lot of time together. He'll come out to dinners with us and he'll hang out and stuff. And I go over there every morning to walk around.

my dog that lives with them oh that's awesome yeah so I go take my dog for a walk and him and my dad are really close that's great he likes it's cool to be able to see the success that's come from such a bad period of time yeah man and did you think it was did you think like my

life is over or did you I did for a little bit because of what society does like the felony and I mean I remember you know distinctly my lawyer was like to the judge pleading for no prison time because how bad a felony is on your record and now I'm at the point where the felony hasn't affected me at all like I've thought about you know maybe go for a pardon but I'm like

Right. Do I? I mean, yeah, it would give me gun rights back, but that's not something I personally am not passionate about. Would it be cool to go to a shooting range, maybe hunting? Yeah. But you made it this far without. Yeah, I made it. But I also think having the felony on my record is a good thing because it gives hope to so many people. Yeah, oh, for sure. Like if I got pardoned tomorrow, say, by Trump, right? Right. Not everyone gets that opportunity, and I get that. And I just feel like I'm more like one of the group. Right. You know, having that felony. Would it be cool? Yeah.

it would be cool you know because I feel like that would be such a redemption arc to it yes but I think the first part is you know paying off the rest of the restitution because then it's like well what could people say bad about me at that part you know right oh you got a lot left right I'm down to 350 now wow that's got

I'm cruising, baby. I'm cruising. Some people owe millions, you know? Dude, when I listen to your story, because I was always like, I want to hear more. And then when you just did the last one, dude, I didn't realize it was – I was like, dude, you are the man. I lived a lot, man. I was like, this shit is crazy. Yeah, and I'm being more vocal about what I'm paying towards it and transparency. I think that's good for the audience to hear kind of where I'm at. And if I could beat each –

like each more than I paid the year before, I'm going to have it off in a few years. Nice, man. That's good. And you are a real person and this is you, you know, this is you and this is what you're going through and what you've been through and it is possible. Like there is redemption and I think you're a good example of that.

Well, thank you, man. Thanks so much for coming again and safe travels back. Your wife definitely missed out by coming out. Erica, you should have come in. Yeah, she should have came out to hang out. But oh, well, you send her a video. She'll see this. It'll be somewhere. You better make her watch it, you know? She probably won't. Thank you, man. Yeah, take care. Awesome.