Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
Beautiful people, this is the Moments Podcast and I'm your host, Lexi Hidalgo. I hope you're ready to learn a little bit something new about yourself or the world or feel a little bit more seen, heard, and understood because you are. And you are beautiful and valuable and I want to be your big sister and your best friend and I'm going to remind you of that hopefully in each and every episode that you listen to. So tune in and enjoy the moment.
Make this new school year an opportunity for your kids to learn important life skills with Greenlight. Greenlight is a debit card and money app for families where kids learn how to save, invest, and spend wisely while parents keep an eye on kids' money habits. Greenlight also helps families get into their fall routine with a chores feature that lets parents assign chores and pay kids allowance when they check them off. Get your first month free at greenlight.com slash spotify. greenlight.com slash spotify.
This episode is brought to you by Shopify. Whether you're selling a little or a lot, Shopify helps you do your thing however you cha-ching. From the launch your online shop stage all the way to the we just hit a million orders stage. No matter what stage you're in, Shopify's there to help you grow. Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash special offer all lowercase. That's shopify.com slash special offer.
Hello my beautiful people and welcome back to the moments podcast. I am really excited for this week's episode. I'm gonna keep it
Kind of quick, but then again, you know me, and kind of to the point, but then again, you also know me. I want to let this be an episode that encourages you to get a pen and paper and to start journaling in whatever that looks like for you. I'm going to tell you why I started journaling, what to start journaling about, why it helps us, and I just really want everybody to know
Be able to deeply understand themselves and heal themselves and let the past be the past because for me, journaling is something that I use to accept the past for what it was and move forward and I'll kind of get into that as we go on. But an episode about journaling. Nonetheless, I would like to also say this right now because it's so exciting and if you've been listening to Moments for...
ever since it came out. I said back in October of 2021 that I wanted to have a guided journal, something that you could follow along the podcast with of some kind of, I didn't know how I was going to do it. I didn't even really have it into a full idea at the time, but I mentioned it in a podcast and it just kind of stuck. And in December of 2021, I really had the idea.
And it really stuck. I knew that I wanted to be able to offer my audience a guided journal. And I didn't want to do it just by myself and produce paper and make a cover and do it all like the really easy and quick way. I wanted to do it the right way. So in January of 2022, I then...
made a journal proposal that was basically like a PowerPoint pitch kind of thing that I sent to a gazillion different publishing companies trying to get one of those publishing companies to want to essentially buy my book, buy my journal. And we had a whole bunch of no's because the journal space is saturated. There's a lot of different journals you can find in a lot of different places. But I
I knew that I wanted this journal to be special. I wanted it to include prompts for beginners, but also prompts that could be used by people who have been journaling forever. No matter what age people were, no matter what gender people were, I wanted to create a journal that everybody could take something away from and use to help grow and evolve themselves. So I finally am able to say that after two years of the publishing process,
I'm launching my own guided journal and it comes out on April 23rd. So very soon when you're listening to this and you can pre-order it now, there's a link in the description. There's also a link in my Instagram bio and my Tik TOK, um, pretty much everywhere. I feel like I've been posting it all over the place, but you can also go on Amazon and search up the moments journal or
Or Barnes & Noble or Target. It's freaking insane. I can't even wrap my head around it. And I am so excited about it, especially in this moment because I got to feel it for the first time yesterday. Or two days ago, I think it was. I got the first copy. And I just was mind blown. It all happened.
came together. When you've been working on something for so long, it kind of feels like you're never going to get to the point where you can actually feel it and it doesn't ever feel feasible or real or tangible.
Until you get to that point. So for two years, I was just like, this doesn't even feel real. It feels fake. Like, yeah, cool. I'm going to have a journal, but when, but why is it taking forever? And especially if you've known me for some time, patients and I are not the greatest of friends. We don't get along so well. Me and finishing projects don't get along along so well. Me and finishing just about anything don't get along so well, but this journal, we made it.
We made it. It is full of affirmations and inspiration and about a zillion different prompts for you to just open up to a random page and start writing and
When I was realizing I wanted to tell you guys about the journal and the podcast because I definitely get myself all sorts of tied up on like what platforms I've shared what things on. First world problems, not a problem at all. But I wanted to make sure I emphasize that on this week's episode because it is such a dream come true. And I would not have been able to do it if it weren't for...
You guys being the most supportive audience and being my greatest friends and my greatest support system in the whole wide world. You guys are the reason that I feel open to being vulnerable and talking about my feelings and talking about the fact that I have journals full of tears. And honestly, you guys have listened. You've heard a lot of my journal entries. I've shared so many of my journal entries with you guys that are usually...
Not something that I think I would be open to sharing with the public. And if you told me five years ago that I would cry on the internet and talk about my deepest, darkest insecurities and struggles and be open about them, I would have laughed in your face. But each of you have given me the courage to do that. And I hope that it is of value. And I hope that...
you guys feel less alone and that each of us feels less alone in everything that we go through because it's important to recognize that exactly. We all go through it. We all struggle and that is probably the deepest rooted message that comes from this podcast and I'm just feeling really excited. There's a lot of bright things coming to the future of moments. I am
I'm actually, as soon as I get home from this trip that I'm going on in a couple of days, am setting up the studio. I've gotten all of the proper mics. The audio quality is finally going to be where I want it to be. I'm with a new...
podcast sponsor per se not a sponsor I don't even know management maybe I don't know the proper word I'm with a new team and I'm really really looking forward to the future of us growing together so thank you for sticking around we're only going up from here all that being said go pre-order the moments journal and let me explain to you why you should journal a little bit more often this episode of the moments podcast is sponsored by better help quick
Quick little intermission, you guys. We all know how important it is to prioritize the right things in our life. And maybe for you, that's prioritizing doing leg day at the gym or making sure you go for your hot girl walk. But how often are you prioritizing your mental health and making sure that therapy is a part of your weekly routine? If it's something that you've been open to, if it's something that you've been considering, I highly recommend BetterHelp. And thank you so much to BetterHelp for sponsoring this episode.
I absolutely love BetterHelp. I love therapy. I have talked about it over and over and over again. And that is for a reason. It is the greatest thing ever. Having an outlet and a person to talk to about what you're going through and getting unbiased opinions and advice is so, so beneficial.
So if you're thinking about starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online. It's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. You just have to fill out a brief questionnaire and you'll get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch therapists anytime for no additional charge. Never skip therapy day with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash moments today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash moments.
Quick little intermission. You guys know how much I love Thrive Cosmetics. I really don't even need to explain it to you because those of you who know me know me, know I've been using their liquid lash extensions mascara for the past three years of my life, and I use it religiously. Even if I'm getting my makeup done, I bring it with me. Not only are their products high performance, but they also give back to the community. And...
They're good for you. They're the best things in the whole entire world. And lately I've been using their Empower Matte Precision Lipstick Crayon. I didn't know what to expect when I tried this, but it is like long lasting and it stays on forever. And there's no dry flaky feeling. I also love to use their Brilliant Eye Brightener. It's like a combo of a highlight and an eyeshadow and it works perfectly on my inner corner. Sometimes I put a little dollop on my nose.
But everything that Thrive has to offer is an absolute 10 out of 10. And I don't say this lightly. I say it from the bottom of my heart. I love everything about this brand. And honestly, being able to tell you about them is such an honor for me.
So refresh your everyday look with Thrive Cosmetics, beauty that gives back. Right now you can get an exclusive 10% off your first order at thrivecosmetics.com slash moments. That's Thrive Cosmetics, C-A-U-S-E-M-E-T-I-C-S dot com slash moments for 10% off your first order. You're going to absolutely love it. I pinky promise you. Have a beautiful day. Back to the pod.
I want to start with kind of how I started journaling and why I started journaling. I used to think it was pointless. I heard people say here and there, oh, you should journal, you should write about it, you should put that on paper and throw it away and rip it up, or you should put that on paper and keep it somewhere. And I kind of just laughed in people's faces. I didn't see the point.
I didn't see the point in writing all of my bad thoughts. Why would I want to see them again? Why would I want to write them on paper? What good could that possibly do for me? And when I first started journaling, it was right before I went to Hawaii in 2021. I have my first journal entry in my nightstand next to my bed. So random. I just don't know where else to put it. I guess I could put it in my letterbox, but...
It's actually me writing about my ex-boyfriend and it wasn't like I miss my ex-boyfriend. It was more like giving myself closure even though I'm the one that ended the relationship. I just needed to be on my own but it was it was a thank you to him and I wish him well and I hope that
He's doing good, and I'm still thinking of him. And also, I'm so excited for this new chapter of my life, and I can't wait to see where this takes me. And I'm pretty sure I wrote it on the airplane flying to Hawaii, or shortly before I went. And it was the first time I ever wrote. And it gave me this simple feeling of peace. I was able to take a deep breath and realize, oh, okay, that's a chapter I've closed, and
Now I'm starting another one. It was a good way for me to take all those things that were going on in my head about a scenario that I just was kind of... Because I didn't go to Hawaii until... I'm trying to think of the timeline here. It's been a while. I broke up with that boyfriend in 2020. Yeah, in 2020 during COVID is when him and I broke up. And I wrote that in 2021. And I...
No, it sounds silly. Of course, like I haven't thought about him since like I know that sounds kind of hard to believe but I truly Wrote that journal entry and I felt closure within myself and I'm using this example because I think it's really easy for all of us to relate to boy drama relationship drama, whatever it may be whatever your Situationship failure or the boy who hurt your feelings or the girl who hurt your feelings? These are really
easy to relate to scenarios, but this doesn't only apply to those. Journaling has also helped me close so many chapters of pain, so many chapters of anxiety, of depression, of friendship struggles and friendship breakups. I have moved forward so confidently the way that I have because I have journaled, because I have physically written on paper that I want to move on and I want to move forward. So
In Hawaii, after I wrote that first journal entry, is when I really took journaling seriously. I would just, again, it started off very much like a diary. This is how I feel. This is what I'm doing. This is the boy I like. Oh my god, I have a crush. Oh my gosh, I'm so hungover. Oh my god, my anxiety is so bad. And that excelled and that evolved into...
Me getting really, really, really deep into my journal in ways that I didn't even recognize. And I've told this story countless times. Like, I feel that when I write things on paper, I tap into a part of my brain that hasn't been touched in a very long time. And I get truly into my subconscious, if that makes any sense. I'll be writing and all of a sudden there's tears dripping down my face. I'm like, oh, that's why. That's how.
That's who. I have these wake-up calls. And in Hawaii, I was really consistent. And I struggled a lot with my mental health when I lived there. Backstory, if you don't know, I lived there for about a year and a half. And I loved it. It was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity experience all around. Would never do it again. That's for sure. I just essentially missed my family. And it also felt like college 2.0 when I was out there. Just everybody was kind of...
doing their own thing. A lot of people were there and their parents were paying for them to be there so nobody worked and everybody just partied and went to the beach and it was epic but it drove me insane as somebody who has always craved making my own money and doing my own thing. When I was in college, worked like five jobs because I just felt so inclined to do things besides the point. I emphasize that because it was just such a
different environment for me to be a part of and I struggled really badly there because it was like this college 2.0 I struggled a lot with anxiety and depression but I hid from it in college because I kept myself so busy in Hawaii I had more time to feel my emotions and we were drinking a lot and drinking does not go well in my brain I am a anxiety girl when it comes to drinking
And I would have such bad anxiety that I needed to write. And I would just write and write and write. And I would...
do it constantly and it pulled me out of some of the really really dark times in Hawaii. That's not to say it stopped them or it turned it off or it made me immediately feel better. No, but it gave me an outlet. An outlet to take all of the anxious thoughts that I was feeling that were on repeat in my head when we overthink, when we get consumed by just one silly thing that we did or one thing that happened. I think
That the only way to get rid of all of those jumbled thoughts is to put them out on paper and then decide which ones are worth being in your mind. We create scenarios in our head like it's nobody's business. We can take, let's take anxiety for example. You do something stupid, you text someone when you're drunk at the club.
You think about that for days sometimes. If you're somebody who does struggle with anxiety, you're like, why did I do that? They're going to think this of me or they're going to think that of me or this person's going to tell that person and that person's going to tell that person. And then I'm for sure going to, who knows? We go crazy and we drive ourselves absolutely insane. So we have to put all those thoughts on paper. We have to get rid of them. It's the only way to survive.
move forward and let the situation go. So that was kind of what I used journaling for and what really got me into it. And then I just made it a goal to constantly journal. And the next reason that I journal and I do my best to keep it consistent, that being said, don't put the pressure on yourself to wake up every single morning and journal every single morning. It's going to get repetitive. It's not going to feel...
Like it flows. You're not going to have enough to say every single day. And when you put pressure on anything, you take the reason away from it. You take the purpose away from it. Pressure ruins things, I think. Anyways, journal when you can, when you feel like it, when it feels right. But Leia, sorry, she sees dogs outside. She's barking. Once we have the podcast studio, we won't have this problem.
This episode is brought to you by Shopify. Whether you're selling a little or a lot, Shopify helps you do your thing, however you cha-ching. From the launch your online shop stage, all the way to the we just hit a million orders stage. No matter what stage you're in, Shopify's there to help you grow. Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash special offer, all lowercase. That's shopify.com slash special offer.
This episode is brought to you by Experian. Are you paying for subscriptions you don't use but can't find the time or energy to cancel them? Experian could cancel unwanted subscriptions for you, saving you an average of $270 per year and plenty of time. Download the Experian app. Results will vary. Not all subscriptions are eligible. Savings are not guaranteed. Paid membership with connected payment account required.
I was saying. Another reason I think it's so important for us to journal, and I feel really heavily strong, heavily strong, I feel really strong on this one, is because we want to be able to look at the past versions of ourselves and reflect on them. I think that journaling can be a tool to set us up for a more successful future. They can make us
better. It can make us continue to grow and to learn from our mistakes and to learn from what we've done and to learn from who we've surrounded ourselves with and how we've spent our free time. When you write consistently, you can look back on the person that you were two years ago. What were you struggling with then? Then you can evaluate what was going on in your life at that time.
Who was I hanging out with? Like, was my anxiety so bad because of a certain friend I was hanging around? Was my anxiety so bad because what did my routine look like? How much money was I spending? Was I stressing financially? Was I consuming alcohol every day? Was I eating...
Something that messes with my stomach every day. There's so much reflection to be found when we read our past journal entries. And it's something that I like to do when I find myself kind of in a little poop hole. I'm in a bad place. I go to my old journals and I keep one journal a year. I go to my old journals and I find a spot where I felt like that a different year.
And I recognized, oh my gosh, you know, it was actually the same month I had a breakdown this year that I did last year. Like I'm no joke for the past three years, guys. I have a breakdown in August and I go through a really, really rough patch of just overwhelm where I'm crying every day and I have what feels like no control over it. And it happens every single August.
And I've been able to track that pattern now because I journal. It's hard to remember a timeline of the past who knows how many years of our life just in our brain. My therapist told me to do this on our first session ever. She said, make me a timeline. I still haven't done it. I'm the worst. Make me a timeline of your life. Make me...
Show me your ups, your downs, the situations you've gone through that are memorable to you from your childhood and write them all down because it can answer so many of our questions about ourselves. Like for example, let's say middle school was really hard for you, but you can't really remember why. And you make this timeline and you have this memory of your parents fighting a lot in middle school.
This is what happened for me. I struggled the worst with my anxiety and depression in eighth grade. And yes, it was because of a bully. It was because of a horrible, terrible, mean girl. But at the same time that was happening to me at school, I would come home and my parents would constantly be fighting. They were going through a rough patch in their own marriage. And that obviously, whether by choice or not by choice, a kid notices that and it latches onto them. And now that time in my life,
applies to me again now in my relationship. I have these fears and these doubts and these worries like anytime Gabe and I fight like is it all gonna end? Are we gonna break up and I will drive myself crazy because of that. Are you getting what I'm saying? Like there's so much importance in reflection and
And it's essentially when you go to therapy, if you do have a therapist, you talk about your past to figure out why you're struggling in the present. And journaling is a really, really cool way to do that on your own. It gives you the power to do the problem solving and the figuring things out. And one reason that I love it so much is because I love patterns. And I love when I can have this epiphany or this wake-up call and I'm like, oh my gosh,
I feel this way because this happened to me because of this situation, this moment, that, and it clicks. And sometimes it doesn't click, but it's a wonderful thing to see happen. And same goes, I'm making this all about like the negative scenarios. The same thing goes. And if not, I honestly, I probably use this more.
When I have really good times in my life or when I am struggling, instead of going back to the bad and seeing how my life was the same then or how the pattern is the same, I'll go to the good times. And I will read about my journal entries when life is really good and when I'm feeling extra grateful and extra appreciation for just the world in general. And I will read about what my mindset was like.
And it helps me really tap back into that version of myself who was happy that the birds woke her up in the morning or whatever it may be, or who was prioritizing eating good food or who was taking care of her body or was feeling super tan or was reading books.
Whatever it was, I tried to apply some of those things from that version of me to the current version of me. It's also, we need to recognize we're ever-changing. Things are going to look different. Life is going to look different. We're going to have our ups and our downs and our really bad times and our really great ones. We know that. None of this is new. But we might as well use the tools of our past to create a brighter future for ourselves. You getting me? Another reason...
I just made like a little bullet point list of why I journal. Also an understanding. I like to, and I've, all of these points kind of connect to one another. We often will not be able to fully interpret a situation until we've gone through all the motions in our brain a gazillion times. I'm talking breakups, friendship breakups,
career changes, family changes, grieving somebody, losing somebody last minute or not last minute, unexpectedly, losing a pet. We grieve for so long, not just grieve physically for real, but we grieve situations and past things that have happened to us. And I believe that when we journal about them, it speeds up our healing process.
We can heal faster when we write. Like I said in the beginning of this episode, we close chapters when we put things on paper. And sometimes you're going to journal about the same thing 10 times before you fully close the chapter. And sometimes you're going to journal about it once. You're going to write literally a sentence about it and something is just going to click snap in your brain. And you're going to feel delightful, wonderful, and light. And sometimes
It's crazy how that works, and it's different for every single person.
It really, really is. But that's a million gazillion reasons that I think you need to start journaling. Now you're probably like, "Lexi, cool, thanks. You really convinced me that I should maybe work through some of my traumas and things that I have going on in my brain." I'm glad that I've done that, but you're probably wondering, "How? Where the F do I start? I'm not a writer. I don't like to write. I don't want to write essays. Like, I am done writing. I did enough of it in school. I'm not writing another thesis statement."
Start it off like I did. Pretend you're in a movie and you're writing in your diary and you want to talk about all the tea at school, all the whatever it is. Tell them about your new outfit. Tell them where you want to go shopping. Tell them what's trending. Like write in your little diary and you will slowly start to dive a little bit deeper or at least make that your goal. Okay, today I told my diary what homework I had.
Tomorrow I'm going to tell my diary what I learned. Tomorrow I'm going to tell my diary who taught me something. The next day I'm going to tell my diary, okay, what did this day teach me? Not just in science class, but overall, as a whole. Is there something that I can take away from this day? And start really, what's the word, like interrogating yourself. Force yourself to think deeper. Force yourself to get a little bit more mindful of
You're like, shit, I don't really think I learned anything today. You probably did. Did you have a conversation with a stranger? Did you have a good talk with your best friend? Did you help a friend talk through a situation with a relationship? Did you go move your body? Did you do something good for the world? Did you fill your time with something valuable?
And if the answer is to no, then maybe you learned, oh, I would like to start filling my free time with something a little bit different than I do right now. Like something a little different than TikTok or Instagram, which nothing wrong with those things. I'm not here to judge that. I scroll on TikTok and Instagram all day. But I know that when I do it too much, I feel like really bad about it. I got into a deep scroll before I started recording this episode and I was like,
What? I hate when that happens, especially when you have a lot to do. So just start by writing what you're learning. Start writing about how you're feeling physically, mentally, any way that you want. And just give it a go and start there and don't put so much pressure on like every journal entry needing to be longer than the Hunger Games. It can be a short paragraph. It can be five sentences. It can be five pages. It could be five notebooks full.
And there's going to be certain days where you really want to have a meaningful journal entry and you'll be able to write three words. That's what I noticed within myself. It's the times that I least want to open my journal, but I decide to, that I write some of my most meaningful words and powerful words that heal me in ways that I didn't know were possible. Everybody needs to get a journal. And if you're not somebody who wants to just journal on a blank paper...
Not to, this is literally, I know that this is a self promo, but I created this journal for this exact reason. Prompts for people who don't know where to start or what to write about. It's little questions for you to give thought to, to think about and evaluate and write about and maybe change something in your life moving forward because of what you realized from what you wrote.
It's prompts to make you think that aren't so crazy and so deep that you're going to be sobbing your eyes out, maybe some of them, but you can open to any page. And if you open to one that you don't want to do in that moment, if it's not speaking to you, not calling you, pick a different one. Pick a different page. It's fine. It's really whatever you want to write.
There is something in the Moments Journal for you to write. And I encourage everybody to pre-order a journal, to get one for your friends, to get one for your family. I'm giving them to my mom, my grandma, my little cousins. There is juice in here, good things for every age group, every gender, every person. There is something for you in the Moments Journal. And I just feel so insane even saying that and so grateful even saying that. And...
It's just crazy. It's just crazy. I can't wait for each and every one of you to understand yourselves a little bit better, to understand situations a little bit better, to heal quicker, to grow stronger, and to feel better.
Another reason I love journaling, I'm just throwing this in there because it just kind of came to me, is I think that you can build a really wonderful friendship with yourself through your journal. Because it's like you're writing to somebody, but nobody's reading it unless you're sharing your entries on the internet, which like sometimes I do. But most of the time when we write, we're just writing to ourselves.
And you're building a stronger connection with yourself. You're building a friendship with yourself. You're talking to yourself like a friend for once because half the time I know that in our brain we don't talk to ourselves like a friend. So that's a good point too. That's a good thing. I should have written that down. I like that one. Journal to become a better friend with yourself. It's also a beautiful way to spend your alone time, to spend your free time, to distract your mind when all your thoughts are a little bit too much and too heavy. But I love you guys.
I really hope this encouraged you to get a journal or to write in a journal or to go in the notes of your phone and to just write something because I love you. And Leia's growling, so we're going to let her say her little outro. Yeah, Leia? Thank you guys so much for everything. I will talk to you next Monday. Bye.