Season 3. Episode 8: Holiday Recap
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What's going on, besties? Welcome to what I feel like we say every week, a very special episode of Pillows and Beer. I feel like I've been gone for ages, which I have, so I'm so, so excited to be back.

Back at it with my boy Craig Conover and Nick Norris, who I have some words for coming up, but I'm so excited to see you guys. Welcome back after the Christmas break and everything. How are y'all? Well, we didn't hear from you for a while, but we're glad that you survived Australia and that you're

you're back here merry christmas to all our best friends out there um we will get into australia later but it was funny i had plenty of face times um with the difference of times um but hey you'll be proud of me look at uh look at what you've turned me into you know what beer this is

Hold on. I have to click on your picture. Trogs, Mad Elf. Trogs, man. Oh, Trogs. That's right. Yeah. Mad Elf. Man, look at me in the holiday brood spirit. He's drinking craft beer. 11%. Do you know where Trogs is out of? Delaware. Delaware.

That's because I used to, it used to be on tap at, uh, at the bar I worked at. Um, well, it's not from Delaware, but, Oh, well then I told a lot of people over those few years in the room. It's from Pennsylvania, but that's okay. That's okay. It's funny. Um,

It's from Hershey. Yeah, it's from Hershey PA. But yeah, Craig, at first when you were saying that, you were like, yeah, well, no one heard from you. I was like, wait a minute. You and I FaceTimed and talked and texted quite often when I was there. Speaking about hearing from people, how about Kyle just not texting us back last night? I think me, you, and Corey were all going to somehow find a way to teleport to his house and blow it up. So...

Last night, last night being December 26th. You were definitely in the cups, which was making me laugh. Yeah. I had eaten a gummy and you were in the cups. Yeah. Quite honestly, here, you can catch everyone up and then I'll read your so eloquent. Okay. So I said this. No, no, I...

craig is going to tell you you know what i say also texted me and said you have to come to closing day and veil you know as i just read that i was like i'll put it on my schedule i don't know yeah like i put on my counter and he was like it's your speed you take hot spring laps and a t-shirt hoodie and go to the top take a jaeger shop eat an oyster then take another lap all while dressed in a reindeer onesie it's incredible and i

I basically was like, you know, that's all I really need in life. And then so then Craig took it upon him to start a group chat with me, him, Corey, and Kyle. And for all those listening that have been watching Winter House the past few years, I've tried to...

like a closing day kind of atmosphere for our last day on the mountain, but it's impossible to actually create a closing day environment unless you've witnessed it or unless it is an actual closing day. So Vail has one of the best, I'm just going to say that, just one of the best closing days out there. I know the people who live in mountain towns, I have friends, think it's blasphemy, lots of great closing days out there, but Vail is

You know, it'll be like April 18th, 19th, 20th, you know, depending on the ski season, which one of the best ever. So we started texting Kyle as if he was actually there.

you know responding to us like if he was in the conversation yeah but he wasn't responding well we like look there's certain people that like you're not going to text right back like there's group chats that you have you know even me and austin can like see a text and be like this doesn't need an immediate answer but we're pretty good about it but like kyle in a fun chat you've gotten better like me kyle austin and you like answer the text and it's about snowboarding and it's about something four months away and so kyle

got to the point where we were like no one doesn't look at their phone for 20 to 30 minutes so like he's clearly ignoring us and

and corey at first wasn't really texting and then we all just started to talk at kyle and uh he could he when he claimed he claims he didn't see his phone last night but when he woke up he said he had a pretty funny text chain i mean to catch up on there was probably really publish it we should publish the we probably should because it turned from like closing day stuff

to all of a sudden, Corey entered Vin Diesel into the chat and we started talking about family. Hashtag family. How dare you turn your back on family, Kyle? Yeah, don't turn your back on family, Kyle. And then it turned, I mean, it just meandered its way. And we were also like, what more do you need? Like, we've got an awesome thing that like set up. And by set up, we mean we're just saying we're going. So like what happened was- We were like, you're the banana to our split. Yeah.

So, so, so Craig pitched an idea and I was right on board, right? Cause I pitched it to Craig and then we went from pitch. I mean, who ever pitch to like,

happiness and then it went you know to anger and then the sadness and then back to happiness as if he had told us no we're like no you know what man fuck you dude if you want to come on the strip with us then fuck you dude and they're like i didn't mean that man i love you and we love to have delays like at first it was frustration because we're like all right dude like

you could have just said like yeah that'll be fun and then after like an hour yeah i went to anger and it was like really dude you're gonna turn your back on us and then it was like all right dude but we're just kidding like please text us back and then we were like whatever man we're gonna have a fun time without you yeah yeah no but still we basically invited kyle planned planned a trip invited kyle and then uninvited him on the trip and changed the reservation before he even decks back if we have yeah yeah yeah we

we were like we got three rooms but dude we you are like we're gonna cancel it fine dude yeah we canceled the room you know i mean we canceled your room you're done sorry forums and then and then we're like no man just kidding man actually it'd be funny if me you and corey went on a trip because i always either room with you or corey um no man we will we will um we we are going whoever is listening

We need to find a vlogger to follow us. We are going to Vail Mountain. Closing day. Closing day, which is one of the best days of the year. It is like, okay, Craig. It's like St. Patrick's Day and the 4th of July put into one day and you're on top of the mountain partying.

Yeah, I'm excited. I look, I want to get out on the mountain. I mean, we have some projects coming up, which I finally, when you were texting me today, I was working out. My parents have like a little, like a small gym in the house and I was working out and I was like,

Why does this, you know, the next project on many that we're doing have to come right after the holidays? Like I was doing so well with how in shape I was. And now, um, thanks. I would tell you, I let myself go a little bit during Thanksgiving and I know a lot of, you know, it's, it's normal, but mine, mine is all or nothing. So the two weeks after Thanksgiving, I didn't do shit except like beat chips and dip. And now I'm like, uh, Greg, I haven't done shit since Thanksgiving. Yeah.

And it's because I knew that I was going to be gone for two weeks. And then it's like, you know, and then it's Christmas and then it's New Year's. So I have just been like, soak it in, you fat piece of shit. Soak it in until the new year hits. And Nick, the way that Craig is talking about like his fitness journey, I swear to God, the next time that I see Craig shirtless, he better have a six pack because he's, he's in men's health.

or journal or whatever you did an interview with i didn't reach out to them they reached out to me craig better be looking like chris hemsworth because he's an australian legend you better be looking like chris hemsworth you know when i see you because i sure won't be i've got 14 days to really like get into it but um

Oh, dude. And it always screws my mom because whenever I come home to my parents, you have a little bit more of like, you know, a structure like there's not, you're just chilling. So I'm like, oh, this is when I'm going to get healthy. And she's like, why do you always have to choose to get healthy? No way, man. No way. Not on the holidays. And, and, and let's talk about that for a second. Right. I feel like I speak for both of us when I say how incredibly lucky we

Okay, for the three of us, how incredibly lucky that we are to have had the holidays that we did. And I know that because I FaceTimed Craig and his brother on his birthday. And your brother was hilarious. He was drunk. He was cracking my ass up. And how freaking lucky are we, Craig? No way that our parents over the holidays are going to let us get in shape. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Like we are eating like Kings, you know, like I, I got home on the 23rd, get home on the 23rd. So I landed from Australia on the 22nd, but late, right. I slept until one o'clock the next day I woke up.

Taylor and Nikki came over just to say hey and to wish me a Merry Christmas. I packed and went straight off to Kiyowa or to Seabrook.

And I didn't get there until eight o'clock at night on the 23rd. By the way, this is always going to be in the same place to me. I keep now adjusting. I know, dude. Austin's in Kiowa. I mean, Seabrook. And I'm like, I'm not going to be one of those guys. I'm just not. I'm going to say he's out of Kiowa. Exactly, dude. Unless I own a house out there, I'm not going to. Right, right.

So, so my first night, by the way, Craig out there, you know, my mother did a wonderful job because she, because she could tell, by the way, she could tell that I was leaning towards, that I was leaning towards being like, Hey mom, I'm tired. You know, can I just come out, you know, tomorrow? And so she did her wonderful motherly guilt thing where she was like, before I could even text her, cause she sensed it coming. She was like,

I have such an amazing meal plan for just the four of us. And I was like, you knew exactly what you were doing. It's kind of like how I have to buy plane tickets for you without you knowing sometimes too. Your tickets already bought. Just come now. Well, that's good. I mean, once you got out there, I'm sure you were relieved to get out. Oh my gosh. I mean, talk about just...

And I know that you feel the exact same way. Like talk about just things and problems just melting away once you like, you know, enter the realm of your hometown. Yeah, I mean, well, it's funny you said we're lucky because we really are fortunate and we're so fortunate that it almost makes me feel bad sometimes.

Like to acknowledge it, but you have to, but like I had, you know, not only just my own, like I had two families to go home to for Christmas. Cause we went up to pages before, like last week. Yeah, man. Yeah.

It was good. Like, I'm glad, you know, sometimes being spontaneous can like pay off. And I like, you know, she was about to fly home and I was supposed to oversee some stuff at the house. And I was like, this is silly. Like it's Christmas. I'm actually just going to come with you. I was like, I'm going to hope that I have clothes at my parents and I'm just going to like, you know, throw my tool of trees in a bag and come. And so anyway, it was good. I went to her house for Christmas.

two months or two nights and her brother and I are like, I've been there enough now that like, I don't feel like I have to spend like, like, I don't feel bad going off to like her brother's room and like playing video games with them. You know, like, it's fun. Like I feel at home there. But then I flew during the vortex on the 22nd. I flew from Albany. I watched your stories, by the way.

Yeah. And let me say that. Yes. Okay. A, I am a fan of, you know, hashtag travels with Craig. I never, I never thought I'd say that, but like I watch and, and I could just tell, right. To just tell, I was like, Craig is trying to add, you know, the things that are happening that you can't, you know, predict it, you know,

A delayed flight is a delayed flight. And that's just the nature of the matter. You can't, you look, you can't change shit. You can't get in the cockpit and say, we're going to take this motherfucker up and we're going like, yeah, I don't care who's timed out, like where you're going. And I think actually like travels with Craig gets me the psychology where I'm like, actually let's turn this into content or make something productive out of it. Or like,

And because, because people, because people, you know, watch it. And although, you know, Craig is like a first class, you know, motherfucker, still the pre-flight things that you do are, you know, relatable things that I do. I mean, Craig has a very, you know, unique,

you know, charcuterie board. No, not a charcuterie board, a crudité board. Yeah, a crudité board and blah, blah, blah. But I could just tell, right. And it was nice because it's like, look, man, no one wants to be working just as much as you don't want to be flying on this day. And so for you to recognize that and talk about it, I was like, good job, Craig, because I'm

no one wants to be working and or flying it is like the day before christmas or you know christmas eve eve and we were like look there could be worse situations that are happening i'm just happy that my flight's taking off everyone's doing a wonderful job and it's good to recognize that thanks some healthy manifestation no i mean it's good because i actually do get messages from people being like hey i almost just freaked out but

like they're like not gonna lie like saw your video and like kind of put things in perspective i mean look we have an uh we have a unique ability we have a unique platform right like austin you and i are talking to like 50 000 of our best friends right now like we're that's really cool and you know nick too if he wasn't staring at his phone the whole time but you know um

you know, if we can spread some positivity, it's pretty, it's pretty great. But I got so lucky American canceled 2,500 flights that day. And I was only delayed by an hour, but I thought once we got stuck, like de-icing, I was like, Oh man. So I figured I was going to drive home from Philly, but I got home and like, dude, I, so I, I, the only time I've ever drank and drive in my life. And I like,

you know it it haunts me but you know for i don't do it anymore but in high school there was a couple times that i drove home from parties that like i looked back on and i was like i used to do the same thing yeah and so pulling into my community though um everyone calls it different development community whatever neighborhood neighborhood um i

I, that was always like, I made it, you know? And, and I don't can, you know, look, we don't condone it. Once I got into the front of my neighborhood is, you know, then you're like,

I'm there. You know, even if it was like, you know, extra, you know, 10 minute drive or whatever you were like, I'm in it. I'm in it. And look, everyone does dumb shit in high school. Fortunately, my ended in high school because my parents were like, if you ever, you know, you're done in college. Yeah. Craig stopped driving drunk in high school, but that does not mean that he stopped doing dumb shit in high school. Let me clarify that. The

The dumb shit just became more dangerous to myself instead of others, which was good. Yeah, it was good. Yeah. And then I decided to film it and put it on TV for everyone to watch. So that feeling, though, that you get, I still get every time I turn into my neighborhood. Like I just and it's and then when I hit my parents driveway, I just like.

You know, it's that feeling if like you were ever in the principal's office and your parents came to like get you, you're like, I want to talk to my parents. I don't know. It's that, that safety. So, well, I definitely know that you feel that way. And I'm glad to hear that you feel that way. And now I want you.

And Paige actually, because Paige and my mother had a wonderful talk to all those listening at a beer festival that I was at like a couple months ago. And Paige has been very vocal about wanting to come out to Seabrook. And my mother is like, come, come, come. So I feel that you two will both have that same feeling that you're talking about right now. That once you get onto the island, you're like, wow.

And like, we'll go out there. We'll have like a crab, but the crab roast. Well, we should, she'll be down. So she's going to be there for January. What's it called? A crab.

A crab feast. I mean, we call it like crab feasts or getting crabs. Like we'll get crabs is usually what it says. Like we'll, we'll get crabs. Been there a time or two. No kidding. But, but like you guys, especially like, yes, Craig going home is like that, you know, for you, but like my parents' home is, you know, 40 minutes away. So like,

I think that you will feel that exact same thing when you come out to my folks home and they'll try to make it feel like home for you. And like, when you get on the Island, you're like Charleston shit or, or, or, you know, whatever is just behind me. And like, here we are. So we'll have a crab feast. Yeah. My, uh, so yeah, I mean, I agree with all that and she's going to be, yeah, we're, I know you guys were supposed to come and,

It didn't work out for various reasons. - Yeah, today I was like, "Mom, Dad." - She was dead set on coming, Paige was. - We will, and she's never been out there. I wanna show her that drive. Today I was like, "Mom, Dad, I'm off." 'Cause we had some family over today and I was like, "I'm off May and June. Hopefully I'm up here a lot." My mom was like, "Right now you're off May and June." And I was like, "Very good point, Mom. I shouldn't say stuff that far in advance."

on uh so christopher's birthday is the 23rd so we had a birthday party for him i saw you guys doing white elephant we i want to compare white elephant rules in a second but christopher was funny because at his birthday so his friends were all there when a lot of our family and my parents best friends and they grew up with me and chris for fighting like chris and i fought everywhere and all the time and so he was like look

look, I got the rules written down from two years ago. And I was like, yeah, bullshit. Like, let's see how you changed them this year. I was like, and he's like, that's why I fucking wrote them down, Craig. Like they are written down on a piece of paper. And we were just kind of kidding. So we had a great,

white elephant party because by the way by the way craig y'all weren't fucking kidding y'all were not kidding at all christopher was probably like motherfucker these are the rules and you were like oh yeah these are the rules and he was like oh yeah i wrote them down i will kill you he was ready to like he was very uh he was definitely the the the dominant person in that like i was kind of kidding on the other side of christmas tree and he was like there's no fucking kidding like this is the rule it's like we're not doing this um

I uh god there's so much to unpack from White Elephant because I know I I love it yeah so one we did raise on Craig Craig should we go to commercial first so maybe we'll wait for the White Elephant you know rules sure yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah all right as much okay yeah I know I know it is it's theatrical baby Nick fuck you I'm still looking at you you little white Christmas ass bitch

Sorry for all the curse words, but we will go to commercial break. When we come back, Craig and I are going to-

A white Christmas. He's... Oh, I was like, why did you just call Nick a white Christmas bitch? Well... We'll get to that later. It's to be determined. It's coming up. No, it's not TBD. It is a fact. Anyways, Craig, I can't wait to hear about yours, your white elephant rules, because I have some of my own. When we come back, more from white elephant Christmas with Craig and Austin, and I guess Nick. All right. Are you tired of your guys wearing the same old clothes...

Year in and year out. Baggy jean, toady, tennis shoes. It's quite literally ridiculous. Fun fact, most guys hate shopping for themselves. Duh. If you don't do it for them, it won't get done.

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so to all the women listening give yourself the gift of not having to look at your man in poorly fitting clothes this year the fuel of our lives is based on compliments and i know a lot of guys listening a lot of girls listening might not know this but guys can be super sensitive and really just want to look good for the significant other in their life or for the random person in the bar that might become their significant other later and i want to address

clean clothes that people think i look good in and ever since um i purchased basically a whole new wardrobe from mugsy three months ago there's really not been a day that i haven't worn some variety of their pants um

in my life and I get compliments on it and people touch them. And it's kind of weird to like promote touching, but you're going to wear clothes that are soft and look so good that people are going to give you a hug or touch your leg and just say, man, you look good today. Craig, you do look good today. And I do want to add this.

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Sponsored in part by Perry Engineering Company. I would like to talk to you about one of our sponsors, Timeline Nutrition, and one product in particular, MitoPure. MitoPure is one of the first products to offer a precise dose of urolithin A to help upgrade your mitochondrial function, help increase cellular energy, and help improve muscle strength and endurance. I've started taking it recently and have started to tell that there is definitely this one I work out or am active.

But MitoPure does more than just help with my muscles. It can help with health stand as well. I want to be one of those granddads one day that you see in the video of him swinging his grandkid around. I want to rely on myself for as long as I possibly can. One way to think of MitoPure is that they are in your cells, chomping up the damaged mitochondria that makes you feel old and tired and helping to recycle it into new healthy ones.

We'll see you next time.

Taking two soft gels a day for two months and you could see significant improvements in your cellular energy, muscle strength, and endurance. After four months of taking Mito Pure, you might feel yourself getting stronger, recovering faster after a workout, and experiencing less inflammation, all part of your healthier aging routine, which is honestly amazing.

Timeline is offering 10% off your first order of Mito Pure. Go to timeline.com slash pillowsandbeer. That's T-I-M-E-L-I-N-E dot com slash pillowsandbeer. These statements and products have not been evaluated by the Friedenslog administration. These products are not invented by no street pure commercialization.

The government, any disease or condition. Want to teach your kids financial literacy but not sure where to start? Greenlight can help. With Greenlight, parents can keep an eye on kids' spending and saving while kids and teens use a card of their own to build money confidence. As a parent, you can send instant money transfers, set up chores, automate allowance, and more.

It's a convenient way to run your household, customized to your family's needs, and the easy way to raise financially smart kids. Get started with Greenlight today and get your first month free at greenlight.com slash pod.

Go experience life-changing comfort with Mugsy. All right. And we are back with this episode of Pillows and Beer. We're so thankful to have you besties listening to our conversation, joining our conversation. Craig was right in the middle of telling me about his, his white, sorry, his,

see Nick's got me all messed up into his white elephant rules and I'm going to tell Craig mine as he drinks a craft beer I'm just yeah and I've got a pumpkin a southern tier pumpkin ale on deck I found but listen so my uncles got drunk on these things at Christopher's birthday I mean they're equal to like three or four beers they

they told my dad that and he was like well be careful and i was like it's still less than wine he was like okay and i was like i think i just lied to my dad no that's different yeah totally different wine is like 14

Yeah. Breakdown with alcohol. It's like a glass of wine is equal to a glass of beer and a shot of alcohol kind of thing. Yeah. Well, not when the beer is 11. Well, that's what I'm saying. Yeah. So it's not the same. No. Okay. Well, I'm going to stick with that. It's definitely not a shot of alcohol, Nick. Don't. So I told my mom, cause I had to run to Salisbury, Maryland, do some shopping. And I told my mom, um,

I was like, I think we need to move the white elephant to like 30 bucks. Cause it's always just been at 20. But I was like, look, mom, like, it's just, I guess it depends on the group. And she's like, well, I don't want anyone, you know, not everyone can do that. And I was like, hold on, hold on.

Let's explain it first. Right. So for, for like, sometimes we have to just stop and just say, so like, you know, Craig is saying, you know, 30 bucks. So white elephant is not to exceed. You're supposed to buy a gift and it's not to exceed a,

Whatever limit that you have set. Craig is saying 30 hours was 25, which I think. Well, ours was 20, but I was, I told my mom, I was like, mom, I'm just going to lie and say whatever this was, was $20. Exactly. And, and basically folks. And she goes, well, I got it. I got my stuff on 40% off. Yeah. Oh, here we go. Yeah. Yeah. So tell everyone what everyone is. Yeah.

Okay. So what happens is that everyone brings a gift. You pick a number out of a hat to get, you know, one through 10 or 12, 15, whatever. And everyone picks a gift, right? So when it's your turn, you are able to either pick a gift or take a gift that's already been opened and not...

And yeah, yeah. So you're able to steal a gift that's already been opened, right? So if you're gift five, then you have four gifts to choose from. So arguably, arguably, everyone says that one is the best number because one can go

One. Yeah. Okay. Okay. So white elephant is basically just a gifting game at Christmas, but you have to bring. Yeah. It's supposed to be fun. Right. Because it's like a jokey kind of gift, but sometimes people bring like things that you actually want. You're like, Oh my gosh. Well, that's a set of wine glasses. Like I really need that. Can a gift be stolen more than once? Oh,

Uh, okay. Here are the rules. Here are the rules. Well, we do three as well. Because once you've been stolen three times, yeah. Three times, not touching any longer. Well, this was our best. And I guess we'll just go out of order for this. This was my favorite white elephant I ever did because they were shit. I actually wanted, what was your gift?

So I went to Walmart. That's what I was telling my mom. I was like, mom, I'm not listening to the fucking rules. And I was like, no one knows how much Nerf guns cost anyway, but I'm getting some bad-ass Nerf guns because I think Nerf guns are just fun because you wouldn't usually buy them for yourself. So now this is funny once. Okay. Okay. I'm just going to say it. My mother was very, I'm not going to say upset, but

She had words to say in the car ride home for those that brought gifts like that. What, like a gun? Well, I also got a BB gun. No, no, no, Craig. No, just a gift that it really, no, like a gag gift, like a gag gift. Oh, a Nerf gun's not a gag gift. It's a gag gift. No, it's not. It was the most, well, okay, go ahead. Okay. It's debatable. Okay. Okay.

I am on your side, Craig. Okay. Because you know, my cousin, Max, sorry, my cousin, Alexis, his husband, anyways, whatever brought, you know, like a funny fucking ornament. Right. And I was like, that's hilarious. And my mom was like,

nobody wants that ornament i was like i want that ornament and she was like you know so like she yeah i don't think you can get categories she brings more practical gifts is what i'm trying to say so she i get that it's like i don't like i brought this you know you know i and a nerf gun's not a gag gift craig are you serious it's a toy a toy is not the same as a gag gift

all right a gag gift is like toilet paper with your face on it or like okay yeah yeah with like yeah yeah so yeah okay got it got it or like you know like i would just say like a toy okay i think nerf guns are fun because i knew there were you too buddy i probably would have traded for it but i give your mom yeah i give my mom saying but like that's too subjective but like i would say like

You don't want someone to end up with a present that really sucks. It's funny. Christmas has already happened. Christmas has already happened. You got what you wanted, needed, blah, blah, blah. For instance, I had a set of

kangaroo balls that on top of it was a bottle opener right but that's cool like i would want that and wendy was like do not bring that to the white elephant i was like

That's really funny. And she was like, no, here is a charcuterie board. And that is what you are adding to the gift list. I was like, okay. All right, mom, whatever makes you happy. Home goods and Kohl's. She brought these like thick, like four wine glasses that were cut. Who did, your mom? Well, she like, that was one of her presents. She does like a lot. This was the first year I got my own, even though I'm 34 years old, but I did good. I thought like, and so here's how ours played out.

I opened a book and it was Snoop Dogg's cookbook.

called From Crook to Cook with Martha Stewart. And I was like, this is fantastic. I was like, I've never gotten a gift that I actually really... And I was elated. And Anna, Christopher's girlfriend, came right over and came over right away and stole it from me. And I was like, motherfucker. And then I stole this awesome elf mug that I wanted. And someone stole that. And I was like, all right, this isn't that fun anymore when you keep getting what you want stolen. And so...

Anna wrapped it up and gave it to me for Christmas the next day. So I thought that was kind of cool. But yeah. And I did, you know, the same thing in this. Like, there wasn't anything that was like, we must have. But there were like a few things that,

So one thing got stolen three times and it was a automatic wine opener, right? Like a rabbit, I think it's called. And it just kept on, you know, you know, Katie, you know, really wanted it. And I was like, you know, Katie should have this, you know, she's like 26 year old girl who's living in New York city. Like, you know, she needs these things. And then my aunt stole it from her. I was like, oh shit, ruthless, like ruthless. She stole it from her. And then,

someone else stole it from her and i was like this is yeah it makes it fun we always did too and and i'll tell you added the third one because we had a santa paul's dog treat bowl um that like i mean we had like six gifts that were stolen three times that like it got cut off so it was that one was pretty fun uh well let's talk about so then so then yes rules we're sorry but asking what was christopher yellow there was there was like a

five-year-old there and she picked the big toy which was a nerf gun and her mom was like thanks craig and i was like this is funny and she i was like does she have any and she's like no and she was like mom i love this i want to shoot my sisters you know whatever and the grandma was like why does she have a nerf gun it was just kind of funny but um nerf uh

- Ah, goodness. - Yeah. So Christopher and I used to fight about which number was best. And what we landed on, and then you can tell me if you guys are different than this. This is what he had to write down. Number one picks the first present. At the very end, after the last person,

Yeah, that's it. The Snoop Dogg book. Oh, wow. Just five stars. I just bought it. Yeah. So at the very end, after the last person goes, the number one person can either put their gift in the middle and steal someone else's. Whereas then that person will either pick the gift in the middle or steal someone else's. Whoever wins.

picks if that if the gift in the middle gets picked or if they decide not to steal the game's over but number one is the best number because it gets to go at the very last and i always said that that was but christopher that's what we play now in this family is number one goes is the first one of the the second round yeah one gets to go last and look at everyone's gifts yes

Yes. And decide to steal or not. Now, it's actually funny – or not funny, but interesting that you say. So if number one steals, number five's gift, then number five gets –

Then they can steal anyone's gift. Oh, yeah. Then they can steal anything. They don't trade with number five. And does it die there? No. If they steal someone else's, then that person steals. It only dies if the person's like, I'll take the gift in the – like the last gift, which is whatever that person gave up. So you can end up going a whole other round. So number one says –

I want number five's gift and they take it. And then number five- And they put their present and number one puts their present in the middle. Okay. And then-

Number five can either take number one. I want one or I'm going to take someone else's. And then they take someone else's. And number one's gift is still in the middle is what you're saying? Yeah. And so if someone picks, like, look, if number one decides to keep their gift at the end, the game's over. If they decide to steal number five's gift and number five wants number one's gift,

then it's over. But if number five takes number three's gift, now number three has to pick or decide whether to steal or pick. So if number three decides to stay at that point, is it over or is it still you're halfway through the round?

No, no, no. It's once someone decides not to steal, it's over. Okay. This is amazing, right? So in my opinion, to everyone listening, it is up to you. If you get number one, you have to create absolute chaos. You have to pick another gift so that someone else has to. Don't just settle. I don't care if it's like a golden goose. Fucking steal.

Stealing pillage and plunder and make the game interesting. - Like my granddad was like at the end, he was like, "Well, I don't want to steal anyone's shit." And we were like, like when we just played yesterday at my granddad's, he was like, we were like, "No, no one cares." Like also at that point, a lot of people didn't like their gift. So we're like steal something. And he did. And then it caused like a domino effect, which was cool. - Love that. - So I think that's how, I couldn't even fight with Christopher this year. 'Cause I was like, I really liked that that way.

God. So what do you guys do differently? Nick said he does only two steals. Is it because UVA sucks at basketball? Anyways. Yeah. Thanks for that. Oh my gosh. This is why for everyone listening, this is why the monetary limit exists is because when I worked for a game at the law firm, we had like a $20 limit. Well, a team shows up with like a $600 TV.

And that's fucked up. You can't do that. And one of the attorneys stole it from one of the paralegals who, just objectively speaking, the attorney made a lot more money than the paralegal at that time. You know, whatever. I hate that I have to try to be politically correct. The attorney is wealthier than the paralegal. That exists. There's nothing politically correct about that, Craig. It's just a fact. Yeah.

so he stole it from her and all the paralegals like all the sports staff was like yeah and i was like akim this is why you don't do that he's like well i thought it was cool to bring a good gift and that's and that's exactly why there is a gift limit so that people don't you know trip over each other and fight each other to get one gift i mean for god's sakes if it's under 30 bucks

you know what if if you loved it that much then you can buy it yourself right but if it's like a role you know it's like hey well i'm wealthy and here's a rolex watch into the mix then like that's like not good that people like so kill each other and yours you end with number one at the end like that's the last thing to happen but you should implement the rule i just i think you like the rule i just said like that yes that is chaos yeah

Chaos. I think that, that either. Okay. So one is definitely the best, but the second best is the last number, right? Because, because then you get the choice to choose any gift that's been opened, right? So if you're number 12, you have 11 gifts to choose from. Yes. One can ultimately steal from you.

Yes, but also there's no, we shouldn't have to say this, but there's no stealing back from a person that stole from you. If it goes in a triangle, you can like at the end, if someone steals it, your gift card, and then someone steals your gift again, you can go steal the gift card, but you can not. And that's allowed, but you can not steal right back from the person. No, no, no, no. It's like, it's not a, it's not a lot to be like, okay, Craig took, you know,

whatever from me. And then I immediately, I'm like, well, I'm taking it right back from you. Right. That's true. That's true. There's no, but it's fun. I'm a, I'm a fan. I think for our family, I'm going to push hard for it to be bumped to $30 next year because you just, you just have more wiggle room with, with, you know, with people wanting stuff. Yeah.

but I understand a lot of people can't do it, but Hey, let's take a quick commercial break. I know you and Nick have some fighting to do over two movies. I've probably never seen, which I know is going to blow your guys' heads. Yeah. So we'll be right back. After this show is sponsored by better help.

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B-E-T-T-E-R-H-E-L-P.com slash pillowsandbeer. What's up, everybody? Welcome back to this special, I guess, homecoming episode for Austin and Christmas episode here with Austin Kroll, Nick Norris. We're here the week between Christmas and New Year's, which I will say is one of my favorite. It's not one of my, I don't hate this week.

January 1st is my least favorite day of the year. Okay, agreed. I think that everybody listening can agree for this one simple fact. This is the week of the year that nothing is expected of anybody. Like Christmas to New Year's, you can get away with just sending out like the most boilerplate email you could possibly get.

think of like you are not expected to accomplish shit in this week so I feel like everybody low-key loves this week it might be the laziest week in America if you are a foreign country this is the week that you invade America because we are not doing a goddamn thing yeah but we are we are all home and I don't think people take exactly exactly dude

uh everyone's like uh yeah yeah yeah yeah I'm now I'm now drinking a Southern Tier pumpkin Imperial pumpkin ale 8.6 I just went down and talked to my brother and I felt a little buzzed and I was like I've only had one beer and then I was like oh but I've had three because did you tell 11% wanna fuck off for me yeah he's in uh they he's been work like we so after the big the big vortex that came across we got like

you know 20 25 calls you know in the last 24 hours of houses flooding from broken pipes so he has been yeah he looks a little more i was gonna with him but he looks a little more like like not defeated but you know like yeah it's just a lot going on today he's just like i was like how many were you at you know and he's like or no i was like so what what did i say i said this is good though right i was like so like

what are you guys doing at this point? But I was talking about how many jobs do we get? And he's like, I'm eating a yogurt. That's what I'm doing. And I was like, oh, okay. Okay, good night. He's had enough of your shit. All right, all right, all right. Let me just take it over from here. First off, fuck you, Nick Norm. You fucking scallywag.

monster that's right i am talking to our beloved nick norris who's no longer beloved to me you are a fucking liar and a cheat he thinks that white christmas shit on it's a wonderful life and i want to dissect this because nick well it's one of my least favorite christmas movies it's right up there with the christmas story it's a wonderful life

Nick, what is White Christmas about? Can I say something? You're one of my least favorite Christmas movies. No, they don't call me Saint Nick for nothing.

well no one calls you that good one hey what is white christmas about so white christmas is about um it's you know it's one of like the first like i guess hd movies here it goes here it goes here it goes here it goes but it's about so it's a world war ii movie it starts out and it's like you know two soldiers a captain a private you know they're putting on a christmas show on christmas blah blah the general comes and he's retiring and

so they go off uh the private saves the captain's life on christmas uh eve and then in war yeah and war is a terrible description

No, no, no. So they go back into New York. So the captain is like Bing Crosby is a big Broadway guy. He does all like, you know, big Broadway shows, that kind of stuff. But, you know, it's like the 50s back then. But they find out that the general has since bought a Christmas lodge in Vermont, but it's not snowing that year. And of course, he just bought it.

And it's going under and everything. You can't get anybody up there, blah, blah, blah, blah. So they bring in their whole like act that they just gave everybody off. They paid for everybody to come back up to Vermont, take over his whole thing. You know, they save his Christmas and then it starts to snow and everything on Christmas Eve and their final show. I will tell you this, Nick, I love you to death. And man, do we have great conversations when Austin's not here? Not because he's not here.

but that might be the, that might be the worst description of something I've ever heard in my entire life. Like I, what that movie is about. I think two guys save a general's Christmas. How's that sound? Two guys perform. Okay. That's not, and they perform one of the greatest songs of all time. I'm going to watch it and I'm going to describe that movie in 10 seconds. Okay. And it will be better now. Now, Craig,

Okay, this is fair. Nick just got like a minute to describe this movie. Can I take a minute to describe how shitty It's a Wonderful Life is? Well, Nick, you can take a minute to fuck your own face is what you can do. And now I'm going to tell you about... I think that White Christmas is just fine. I do. Nick, for some reason, hates seeing people happy, I guess. I don't know. But...

Here is the plot of It's a Wonderful Life. And Craig's probably going to shit on it too because he's been very shit on things. I know It's a Wonderful Life because my dad watches it every Christmas Eve when he puts our presents around the Christmas tree. Okay, good. But I choose not to watch it with him. I am going to tell this to you in 30 seconds. Not just you, but to everybody. It's a Wonderful Life. I'm going to time it. Okay, good. Shit. Okay, one minute, Craig. I need one minute. Okay.

i need one minute seconds you should be able to describe it okay go go okay okay so so it's a wonderful life it is jimmy stewart and it's the classic movie of what would happen like if i wasn't born right ah the whole world would be better off if i wasn't born so an angel in clarence

poof it's done so it shows the the town what it would have been like had jimmy stewart not been born and he realizes just how wonderful that his life is and it is a absolute tearjerker and that is it i'm done go okay but here's that was in 38 seconds i would thank you i would have said i would have said you did good by hitting on

The world would be better off if I wasn't here. And then there's some really cool shit that happens in the movie that I didn't say really cool shit. No, no. At the end of the movie, his life still sucks.

His life hasn't improved at all. Nick, your life sucks. But doesn't the guy come in with the bank loan at the end and saves the day? No, he doesn't actually. He doesn't get the money. Nick, he doesn't get the money. I would like to talk to you about one of our sponsors, Timeline Nutrition.

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Sorry, I've been in Australia for a while. Yeah, that's actually going to pass. The fucking whole town comes to the house after Mr. Potter, that angry old curmudgeon, fucking dies.

Pulls him over and he's like, oh my God, I'm going to jail. And the whole town comes to town and his brother, the war hero, the World War II hero, comes to his house after his childhood friend, Sam Chip, you know, he says $25,000 can be advanced to my good friend,

And then his brother comes to town and goes, here's a toast to my big brother, George, the richest man in town. And that is it right there. No scene is better than that. So Austin likes White Christmas, but Nick, do you like

It's a Wonderful Life. Oh, it's stupid. And that's my problem with it. It's literally my... It's right up there with the Christmas stories, like the most overrated Christmas movies of all time. Okay, well, Christmas Story is a very good one, but it's stupid. And it's set the model. I don't like it either. A Christmas Story with, like, past, present, and future? No, no, no, no. No, buddy. That's...

no it's a christmas carol that's wait yeah that is a christmas carol money and that is classic that's classic so what's your favorite rendition of that mine's like that's like top ghost of girlfriends craig would say that it's not gonna come i'm just glad you didn't say the new one with will which is my instagram i've never i've heard it was awful page

Paige doesn't like musicals. She hates musicals. She would have White Christmas. I hate musicals too. White Christmas or The Sound of Music are the only musicals I like. Isn't Sound of Music a Christmas music? It's so stupid. White Christmas. I know that a lot of you out there really like White Christmas, but that's because your bestie is Nick. We watched the new one with Will Ferrell and

uh ryan reynolds and we didn't realize it was going to be a musical and i usually like musicals but my dad and page were like what the is going on like it just i enjoyed it but i also like laughed at like yeah i've actually heard it's terrible

Yeah, like... Will Ferrell can't sing. Ryan Reynolds can't sing. Thank God. I like anything that they do. You know, I'm an easy... Like, I'm very easy. Usually I do too, but I just... Like the...

Yeah, I know. We don't want to spoil it. Oh, wait. Talking about spoilers, I do want to ask everyone a question right into this. You know how there's memes that say, like, what happened to the person that did this in high school? Or, like, we're all, like, the emo kids or whatever. I've got one. And this podcast is fans of Santa. So we know a lot of you guys listen with your children. And we're not going to say anything other than we wish we lived in the North Pole with Santa and the elves.

Now, the kids that used to ride the school bus and try to be mean about Santa, what happened to them in life? That's what I want to know. What happened to all those guys that used to be negative Nancys? What happened to them? And it was usually because they had a mean older brother that did it to them, but what happened to them? Well...

Did you see the, speaking of that, did you not see the, I figured you were talking about the Instagram like meme that's going around or like video going around that of the guy driving by like a school bus stop and screaming out the window. No, don't. Yeah, don't worry. Awesome. What were you saying? What did he say? No. Okay. Well, now you have to cut that. Oh, shit. Okay. So, Austin, what do you think happened to those guys? We're going to bleep that part.

Just believe it. It'll be funny. Yeah. Okay. So my, were you one of those guys? No, my, my look, I'm a son of a bitch in many ways, but I'm not the, I think that's one of the most cruel things you've done. Yeah. Uh, I'm not the telling. So my mother, I can't believe it. Don't worry. Yes. Okay.

Dude, I don't think that little children listen to this podcast. Yeah, they listen in their cars. That's why we can't cuss so much. Sorry, what? People listen in their cars with their kids and that's why they say please don't curse. Or when they're in the kitchen or something, yeah.

It doesn't matter. We're bleeping it. Okay. Mother hacker. Okay. So... Mother hen. Mother... Okay. No. Well, then I don't want to because this is a story about... I just said, what do you think... Oh, yeah. Don't tell this story. We can't on here. But what do you think happened to all those guys? I think that they're CEOs of companies. They're on the Forbes 500 list. They are...

They're dating marriages. Okay, fine. I think that they're all in prison and they're right. Reynolds from that movie. They're waiting in the chair. Okay. Yeah. Craig, Craig, Craig, can we go back to this? Can we go back to this? One of the biggest things that you and I, like one of the things that we always talked about was celebrity crushes. Right. And Craig had a little crush on Chris Pine and Ryan Reynolds.

And it's not that I don't think of Ryan Reynolds as a handsome man. I mean, I'm not blind, but the man is typecast. Now I don't, I think, I,

Why not? It's like Will Ferrell. If you like the guy, it's fine that they're typecast. And also, I do like the new Christmas movie because it examines the new lobbyist situation incredibly, how they basically pay to disrupt the world and they benefit off it. Of course Craig takes that out of the Christmas movie. Yeah, I was like, yeah, that's exactly what happened. It's like political unrest is profitable. Because I'm pretty sure that I missed the part where Ryan Reynolds had a tinfoil hat on, Craig. Oh.

He literally stirs up unrest and then makes a fuck ton of money off it.

Well, he will make a fuck ton of money off of whatever he does. Also, all the kids listening, sorry for saying fuck, but it's nowhere near. We'll cuss on this podcast, but we won't be there. Sticks and stones, everybody. But we know that Santa Claus is real. We're not fools. I did watch a movie by the way recently, Netflix. Okay, the first night that I got to queue with Craig, and you know what I mean by that.

Get your phone out of my face right now. I will kill you. I was going to text Nick, don't cut it, but bleep it. It'll be funny. I got bleeps that I use. Yeah, just use the bleeps. So first night that I was home, 23rd, watched two just out-of-pocket videos.

dumb ass movies on Netflix. Let me guess. One was when Santa killed a bunch of fucking people. I love that movie, by the way. Oh, is it the David Arbour movie? Yeah, the Violent Night. I love that movie. You know what? I'm going to watch it tonight when we get off. Wait, that's not one of the ones you're talking about? No, no, no, it's not. We'll get to that one because I saw that. Whoa. Okay, so one was...

a movie where and it's so funny right so there's a lawyer and a lawyer and they meet and turn okay it's kind of like hallmark style yes but it's kind of like the plot of fever pitch you know fever pitch

It's Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon. And she said, oh, you know, he's this great guy and I like him so much. Oh, wait. Turns out that his big if is or but is that he's obsessed with the Red Sox. He hasn't missed a game in 30 years and everything. His sheets, his shower curtains. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So that's what this is. This guy is obsessed with Christmas. Okay. And then boom.

He meets her kid and she's talking about, you know, Santa, the kid who's like six. And he's like, well, yeah, that's because Santa Claus is real. And she's like, and that's what the whole premise is. It's called I Believe in Santa. Oh, yeah. I saw a commercial for that, but it's like dead serious. It's dead serious. It's dead serious. Okay. So how was it? It wasn't good?

you know, it's a fricking, you know, Hallmark movie. And I just want to create some buzz here. And I just want this to be used as one of our clips, Nick, right here. And right now I know that everyone is here for the Lilo kind of reboot. Like, yes, Lilo love you. You did a move. It's awesome. It was one of the worst pieces of shit I've ever seen. It wasn't too bad. It was so bad. If you're a critic like Austin and,

And Nick probably is. Yes. You're going to get a pretty low score on Ron DeVito. She was like, oh, I fell down and hurt my head. And I'm Paris Hilton. But no one in this tiny town knows who I am until the last second of the movie. But it's overboard. It's the overboard plot.

Yeah, and they just remade that movie the other day, like a year ago too, didn't they? Everybody knows who Paris Hilton is. I would have been like, oh, because she's supposed to be Paris Hilton in the movie. Is she friends with Paris Hilton? Oh, really?

She is the hotel tycoon's daughter, right? See, also, I'm going to disagree with you. I bet you there's a lot of younger people that don't know who Paris is. Like, they saw a picture of Paris Hilton, they wouldn't know who she is. Okay, okay. Not to the point. What I'm trying to say is this. She, okay, she's in a small town. She's in a small town, right? She's in a small town, right? You don't think that somebody in that she was in was like, wait, are you?

Yeah, there weren't a lot of checks and balances on that. Come on. At least in Overboard, they were sequestered. They were sequestered in the house. And it was back then, really before the internet, when that movie came out. I mean, look, I was happy to watch it. I'm not watching it again. I was too. And they gave me someone to root against. I wanted to root against that dude. I actually almost punched my TV at the dude. Okay, but he was like...

in the bright spot for me he was funny as shit yeah i mean this follows our typical analysis of the movie true the guy that i wanted to fight you thought was hilarious um yeah if he was like a house i would watch the hell out of him yeah like that dude you would like me on winter house and i would hate me on winter well i did hate you on your house but i love me on winter

You thought it was funny, the first one. And I was like, please don't tell me that. Well, the first one was funny. Yeah. So I watched the – Paige's brother put on the Violent Night Santa Claus one, and I was like, I am so confused right now. And I was like, this is insane.

It was pretty bomb. It's basically John Wick meets Santa Claus. Sorry, sorry, sorry. I don't even know why I said that because I haven't seen it, but I imagine that it is pretty bomb. It's exactly what you want in a movie. It's, you know, Die Hard meets Home Alone meets John Wick. I fell asleep halfway through, but I was pretty... Oh, Craig. I... God. See, you want to punch that one guy, and I just want to punch you in the face sometimes when we talk about things like that. How could you fall asleep during... It's called violent...

Nick, Nick, I was about to say something to you about, you know. I don't know if I've ever drank a beer in bed before. You wouldn't know Christmas if it slapped you in the face, Nick. Oh, bullshit. People really like his fireplace mantle.

Last week. All right, Austin, I'm going to say we're going to keep talking for a little bit, but I want to hear about Australia next week. I think this has been a great Christmas one. I want to do Australia next week. I think the Christmas one is good. I do want to hear about how your mom's a pothead now, though.

Who? Can I tell you that? Oh, me or him? No, I'm looking at someone's mom's, well, not a pothead, but someone's mom's mom. Oh, that seems to be Nick's mom because my mom knows that she's doing it and she likes it. Oh, that's amazing. I'm one day I'm going to do that. I'm getting close. She eats gummies, you know, and she's not afraid either, Craig. Like, you know, sometimes like, hey, mom, you know, this is like a 10, you know, just eat half. And she's like, what? Oh, yeah.

You know what that is? That's a girl thing. That's a girl thing. Girls do that. Me, I'm like, look. And then two hours. Me too. I'm going to press it. And then the girls are just like, what? Oh, whatever. It'll be fine. And I'm like. My mom doesn't give a shit, man. Not one shit. And then she's like.

when's it supposed to kick in as i'm like you know holding onto the floor for dear life and she's like when is this gonna kick in i'm like i don't know that was three like mom you want to prep some snacks while you still feel good because we're really going on some yeah yeah yeah yeah nick so what's going on with your mom so it's so great so my mom's always been one of them

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Show us a picture of your mom, Nick. Show us a picture of your mom, Nick.

Fight you both. No, it's just, you know, she's always been one of those that's totally against weed and everything. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Always judged, you know, us. And then when it started, you know, becoming legal. It's, you know, started becoming legal and we started buying gummies and everything. She's like, Nick, why are you taking that shit? It's not good for you. It should be illegal. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. You know, she's always been a bad sleeper and also has like bad knees. So she's like been needing like pain relief.

She's tried everything, you know, from melatonin to like CBD to never gone like full on, like hardcore, like, like ambient, like that kind of shit. But Austin knows all about it. Yes. Austin does know all about that. She's never gone that hardcore.

I actually, okay, no, I wanted to talk, go, and then I'll talk. But so she found a brand online and obviously this was a brand before like Delta 8 and like Delta 10 became illegal because it's just called Just CBD. Delta 8 is illegal now? No, no, no, before it became legal. It was like Just CBD was legal.

So the brand is called Just CBD. Right. And the gummies are Just CBD. But she's been taking them for probably over a month now. And my dad comes down, like, we're, like, working. He's like – Well, you can't sell something that's not Just CBD. Well, it's called CBD, and then it's plus THC. So it's 40 milligrams CBD. Yeah, but is the brand called Just CBD? Yes, that's literally what it's called. Yeah, that's dog shit. You can't do that. And also – Well, apparently you can, Craig.

So my dad comes down, he's like, I'm pretty sure there's more in this than CBD because it says THC. So I read the label. I'm like, I took one. He took one. And I was like, two hours later, I was like, it's like the diet smokes. They're not like a heavy dosage, but it's like- And I love diet smoke. And as someone who's never done-

It was never like done read before, but she might've was like, yeah, she's been like saying she's sleeping great. You know, she's been having like crazy dreams and everything. And my dad and I look at each other and she was like, Oh my God, she's been getting high for the past month. You're high. Yeah.

And then, so of course, like you bring it up to her and she's like, well, Nick, I'm not doing it to get high. It actually, I'm like, but this is just an example. Weed is not just to get high off of it actually does help people. You know what the craziest part is, is that no, the here, here's what I realized when I was probably high. The fact that no one's ever overdosed from weed is another argument for

for the fact that whatever higher power is out there, if they are mother nature, whoever it was legitimately gave us a natural medicine that can never harm you. You green out. That's pretty much it. Yeah. Well, I just saw like a tick tock on a girl that instead of doing two, like three, Oh, it was no, it wasn't tick tock. It was,

It was three drops. So that is another thing going to the CBD thing is. Instead of doing three drops, she did three vials of the drops and tried to get it. I mean, that's what people did with like gummies is, you know, people were taking like eight CBD gummies to feel like almost anything. And then they're like, oh, this Delta H is the same thing. So they take like seven or eight Delta H gummies. Yeah. And they'd be hiding under their, you'd have to come pull them out of the sink. All right. Let's do one question and then we'll wrap it up for this week. That was a great.

Great seeing you guys catching up. You guys got any New Year's resolutions before we get into that? Yeah, but mine are like be a better son and be a better brother. Like mine are a little deeper like that. Like I want to be more present with my family. Mine are like Zac Efron from Baywatch. What? Stop crushing on Zac Efron? No, mine are just start looking like Zac Efron from Baywatch. Just totally shredded. Yeah, but that's good. Fuck it.

Wait, that's yours? That's a good one. Look up his workout that he did for the movie. No, it's not a good one. That is promoting false body fucking image. False body image? If you work out, you will look like that.

No, you won't. You just won't. I'm sorry to say. Okay. So noodle. You're not. You will not. I'm coming down to Charleston. Unless you ruin your life and just have zero fun. And you're like, I'm going to eat chicken and avocado and rice.

for seven months i'm gonna look fantastic by summer i'm gonna rub it in austin's face that's what my goal is nick i hope that you do look fucking you know fantastic while you watch white christmas by yourself and okay what's your what's your sorry i hope you've moved this this podcast from the car with the kids listening to your airpods at this point okay mine mine uh is moderation

amongst other things, which as Craig's been saying, you are going to hear all sorts of things about resolutions and whatnot in our upcoming project, as Craig says. But moderation for me is a very good one. And I feel like you feel the exact same way, Craig. Moderation is good. Moderation is good, whether it's drinking, whether it's

doing any sort of vice that you have in moderation. Moderation is the word of my 2023. Good.

I know. I mean, there are great ones. I support that. And this is going to be, it's not a two-parter, but it's going to be like, or maybe it is two-parter, but you'll hear similar stuff in the next one. Honestly, though, these are, there's three great questions on here. Maybe we do two real quick. Just because we skipped last week. You know, what's funny, Craig, is that they're never quick because you and I,

We dive in. We're like, you need to hear this from us. Am I listening to Craig and Austin? Well, here, there's opinionated ones and then there's ones that can really help people. Here, let's start with something that we...

will have a pretty good answer on i think i've recently started to get accepted to colleges and i know more rejection and acceptance letters on the way i had no idea what i wanted so i applied to a bunch of different schools and did not realize how many would actually accept me and now that they have i am panicking i will choose poorly please need whatever advice you can give me for where to go to college for me

It is go where you want to spend the next four years of your life. And I know it goes against a lot of what you've always heard, but find a decent school. Find a decent school, but go somewhere you want to live for the next four years. You got to base it a little bit on partying and social life. Partying is a dark word, but you got to base your college experience

off. It should be half social life, half education. It just has to be. Okay. I'm going to give you, I'm going to give you a piece of advice that Craig's given me a few times and, and I'm surprised you didn't say it, Craig, but go where you want to go and or feels right to you and not what is

what you're supposed to do. Not what is expected of you or what you're supposed to do, where you feel at home. And as an 18-year-old kid, sometimes, you know, 17, holy moly, like if I could go back, would I have done it differently? Maybe, but you know, I didn't. I went to Alabama and Craig went to CSC, but like,

go where feels right. Like where do you feel it? Well, you already know where you want to go is what I'm glad you reminded me of that. Awesome. What I always tell Austin, I was like, you already know the answer. Just do it. So, and that's exactly right. You already know who you, you asked us this question, hoping to get a certain response, whatever you wanted that response to be, go there. That's because you,

If you don't do that, you're always going to be wondering what if. What if I went – say you wanted to go to Mississippi and you're like, I really want to go to Mississippi, but I think my parents want me to go to Stanford and I think that will get me into a better law school and I think that will get me a better law firm. The whole time you're at Stanford, you're going to be thinking about what's going on in Mississippi. But if you go to Mississippi, you're going to have fun. I don't know why I picked those schools, but –

It's just very true. Also don't follow a partner to college. Don't follow a girl or a guy to college. I am so, so thankful that I didn't have a partner into college. And like, you know, we both know friends that did and, and damn did that, you know, ruined their whole freshman year. You know, their whole freshman year was like, you know, I'm going to go home and call, you know, so-and-so. And you're like, what are you doing? So, yeah.

this is good definitely my husband's best friend's fiance i kind of answered this last week austin a similar question so i want you to answer it my husband's best friend's fiance like me and you so you're a fiance yeah yeah yeah okay um it sounds like pages anyway and i pretty much hate each other and during friend gatherings it's pretty awkward it's very awkward between us and we don't even look at each other any advice

you can give me on how to act around her. They're getting married soon and she's already told people that I'm not invited. Plus no one likes her. I try not to be a bitch, but sometimes it's hard. Basically Austin, if like, if your fiance and mine hated each other and Paige was being mean to her and was like, well, Austin and her aren't invited to the wedding. I, I, anyway, I said, I was gonna let you answer. You answer it. Yeah. That, that would be, uh,

That'd be really fucked up, Craig. If my future wife and your future wife didn't like each other, that would be an interesting thing. I would sit down with my wife and say, look, this person can be a part of our lives for a long time to come and maybe y'all just got off on the wrong foot. That's nine times out of ten what it is, Craig. I said it's the guys who are

responsibility yeah a great girl shouldn't have to do anything like if paige was being mean to your fiance that falls on me to be like look this is one of my best friends and this is his girlfriend yeah you need to stop that's that's you know what i'm saying you know that's basically what i'm saying like hey like if yeah you like like i i would look at my wife or what happens and yeah here's the thing like she's asking and the problem is is that her boyfriend okay so let's try stop trying to like

use symbolism here in the question i think her boyfriend should go to the guy and be like look dude like your girl's a problem and i've had to do this before i actually told my friend that i wasn't going to go to his wedding i agree with that by the way like he agreed with that by the way yeah sorry go ahead because because you know the funny thing that i was thinking about is like if if

somebody tried to tell me that I wasn't coming to your wedding. I'd be like, tough shit. I'm coming to the wedding. Whether you don't like me or my fiance, like I'm coming to Craig's wedding. So sorry to bust your bubble, darling. And you'd probably come to me and be like, look, dude, like you're, you're, she's causing issues. Like we're good. But like, she's being like, I think the girl asking this question, boyfriend needs to step up to his friend and just be like, how do we work this out?

i think so what happens if uh to go to the back end of this question if your girl like let's say paige goes and says i don't want you being if like austin's dating somebody i don't want you being friends with them anymore i'm not saying you do that but i'm just saying and look this happened to someone in my close circle of friends of course they didn't get married but we left we went and visited them one time and she was such a disaster i said look man

we're not doing this anymore. And if you're still with her, you're not going to be with us anymore. Cause I just had to put my foot down. She was awful to everyone. And the problem is like guys,

what i was just going to say he was in a toxic relationship and they get in so deep that they don't know how to get out but eventually you just have to be like we're not going to be around it anymore you know we're just not you know so so you know what i was going to say is this like i feel like communication is so so key and and and and craig and i had this exact same talk you know last year literally on the show right where it was like we decided to talk about things and air out things

no longer just like let things fester, right? Like that's so fucking important communication. It's not like, you know, we created something new that y'all didn't know, but, but, but,

But if something was up between mine and his, I would be like, I truly think that communication would probably be what was up. And the guys need to get involved. If you communicated better, maybe if everybody communicated better,

then they'd be like, okay, okay. You're not the worst person. I can tolerate you. That's all that you need to do. All you need to be able to do is tolerate each other. And that is, in my opinion, communication.

All right, guys. Well, Nick, I don't want you to, sometimes you do this even when I tell you not to. I don't want you to change these questions at all. I'm going to come back to them next week. They're incredible questions. I'll just delete the ones we answered. Just the ones that we answered. But until next week, guys, we love having Austin back. Welcome back to the States. See you next year. Nick, I love your cardigan. That's right.

And it's always amazing seeing you. And to all of our best friends out there, the introductions or coming up to us and telling us you're a bestie or a best friend is only increasing and snowballing and making us, you'll see our general reaction is just incredible when you tell us. So we love all of y'all and Austin. And hey, besties, we'll see you in 2023. Happy New Year to all of you. That's an Austin joke.

It's not a joke. It's not a joke. It's a real thing. Exit music, play.

And what's up pillows and beers listeners. I'm reality. Steve, if you're a fan of the bachelor and all things, pop culture, reality TV, you should check out my show, the reality, Steve podcast, a daily show about the bachelor, other reality TV shows. You may be watching right now. I definitely throw in a lot of Taylor Swift talk and so much more search reality, Steve on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen to your podcasts.

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