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And just like that, we're back on the air. Welcome back to yet another carefully reckless episode with your girl Jess Hilarious. And I will be fixing mess what I do, what I always do, and what I do best. Listen, so if you haven't seen or haven't heard, yes, I am the official third co-host for Breakfast Club. Clap it up, clap it up. Great, great, great. And then I also, I was going through the comments and I had seen...
And people still trying to put together what happened and all that shit. When it's really just, you know, just as simple as this. I still don't business and I got what I wanted, which was, you know, what I was worth. And that was just it.
I'm in the comments saying, oh, she has stopped everything. She stopped doing her. I knew something was going on because she stopped her podcast. I ain't never fucking stopped fixing people's mess. One ain't even got nothing to do with the other. This ain't got nothing to do with Breakfast Club, okay? Okay. That's why y'all ain't hear about it until now. Don't ever say I discontinued something because that ain't what I do, okay? Just because y'all thought I ain't get one thing. And even if I didn't get that, I'm still just hilarious before and after Breakfast Club. So stop playing with me. Now let's get into it.
So we got a long story, y'all. And then we also have a voice note if we get to that today, because this story is long. So we may not even get to it. But whatever I don't get to today, we'll get to next Wednesday. Listen, good evening, Jess. First of all, I want to say congratulations all to you on getting Breakfast Club. Beyond proud of you, girl. Let's get into it. I have been on and off with my ex-boyfriend for about two years. I go in every time with the same mindset that things will get better because people do grow every time we're on good terms.
But then it always goes downhill. I know what that feels like. I look at him as the love of my life, but also my best friend. Oh, me too, me too. So it's hard to just completely cut him out of my life. I understand that. Now, for the past month, we have been talking a little less and even haven't been linking up as much. So I decided to just be okay with that because I still want us to remain how we are. I mean, but that's the pattern, girl. You know, as far as our little understanding goes. Mm-hmm.
He hit me up two nights ago and says he wants to talk to me and immediately I got nervous but excited at the same time because I just didn't know what he had to say. Jazz, this man tells me he's been talking to somebody and he likes where it's going and he don't think that we should continue to keep doing this anymore. Oh my god.
My heart shattered. The A. It wasn't really much that I could say because for one, we're not together. And for two, every time we try to make it work, it never does. I understand. And three, he just seemed very solid on his decision with this. So I say to him, we can't continue to just be friends then? I want to say something, but I'm going to wait till I finish. And he tells me no, because it wouldn't be fair to what he has going on and
And he just knows how he is when I'm around. I took that as okay and he still loves me. Bitch, what? Never mind, I'm sorry. So what do my dumb ass do? You said it, not me. I pulled up to his house and parked across the street. Hold up, hold up. I was just going to surprise him and just try to talk to him because, Jess, I'm just honestly not ready to let him go.
That could have been the dumbest thing I have ever done. I pulled up there just to see him getting out the car with the girl. He looked happy as ever, I can't even lie. So all I did was drive off, thank God. It's been only two days, but just knowing that he's not going to be around as much and I just won't have him anymore is killing me. And this is one of the hardest things I've had to deal with. Seeing the love of your life happy with someone else when it's supposed to be you sucks.
I don't really have any questions for you, Jess, because this is literally something I have to get over myself. But I would love for you to just give me some advice. Okay. Well, for one, that makes me think of something I was just watching over the weekend. I was watching Acrimony, and that was one of the best Tyler Perry films that I've seen ever.
Taraji P. Anderson, let's just give a big shout out to her. She killed that goddamn role, man. But something happened similar in there. I mean, her husband, you know, who became her ex-husband by her own choice eventually, was the love of her life as well. And then he moved on, got rich and everything. And then he actually got a new woman, was engaged and had a baby and had given his new wife the life that she
You know, he had promised to give his ex-wife, who, you know, Taraji P. Henson played, and she couldn't let him go. And I don't know if you've ever seen Necromony, but did you see how that ended? You know, she ended up losing her mind. And then also...
kind of sort of taking her own life you know being killed or whatever you know she she kind of did that herself you know she ended up dead um is the thing not saying she will end up dying if you don't let it go but you just never know to what extent things can go you pulled up over there and i'm glad you had sense enough to drive off however things could have went left
And very bad for you, you know, say she had a gun, say you got out the car, went over there to approach him and she had a gun and she shot you. Say she whooped your ass. You know what I'm saying? Say just whatever, you know, and the guy clearly told you, you said he had a conversation with you and he told you like, listen, I don't think this has been going well for us, you know, and I moved on with somebody, right?
And I'm actually happy where I'm at. So I just want to let you know that this can't happen anymore. I actually will say I respect his honesty. He was honest enough to tell you because he didn't really owe you that much because y'all weren't together. And, you know, you said that.
That's always rule of thumb, honesty, be open and honest. That communication thing has to always be there because we expect these men to be honest with us. But we know that most of them or a lot of them are liars. So when a guy tells the truth, you have to respect him with that, too, because like I said, he didn't owe you that to tell you that he was already lying.
talking to somebody and he was happy with them he was happy the way things were going for you to come back that was your cue to hang up first of all okay I got you because you you already established the pattern you already saw it you already discovered it you said you know we've been talking a lot less lately and we hardly ever link up anymore you know what I mean but I just took it
For what it was, because we weren't together. You know what I mean? So you had to already know that he was doing something anyway. I mean, we as women, we get these feelings. And most of the time, we're not wrong. We're not right all the time. But a lot of times we are, especially if you feel it. You knew that. You could already tell by his patterns and the switch-ups, right? And let's just call it what it is. You were just somebody that he was talking to.
real quick. And you just went a lot further in your feelings than he did, you know, because you're calling him the love of your life. And I guarantee you, he never felt that way or he wouldn't be with who he's with. I really don't have advice. You got it. You know, move on. I got advice for the future. Next time, don't do this shit. You know, don't do this shit. If a man tells you blatantly, listen, you know, because you said we can't be friends again. We can't just be friends. You know damn well that ain't what you want. You didn't want that.
We can't be friends. You know, when I'm around you, you know, I don't fuck my friends. You know, you would still be trying to throw him that pussy and you already know what's up. And he said he knows how he is around you. So he didn't even he didn't even want to even try that. Go down that road. That also tells me he has a sense of loyalty and the right woman gets it. You didn't really hold yourself to a high enough standard anywhere. You would have been his girlfriend. You would have been his.
The love of his life. He was ready to still be a side chick. He told you that he was he was happy with somebody else. You know what I'm saying? So cherish yourself, value yourself more. You know what I mean? We should never be willing, like willing and voluntarily being a, you know, a side chick or or the second to any woman. You know, don't don't do that. Don't ever do that.
Yeah, you had to get over this. And like you said, it's only been two days or whatever. You know, you wrote me a story January 25th. We're now in February, early February. Check back in with me and let me know what's going on, because I really love to to keep pouring into you so you can see your worth and see that it is somebody out there that will do you like he doing his girl now. He looked happier than ever, girl. The best thing you could have did was pull the fuck off. And I'm happy. Don't call him back. None of that.
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And moving on. Okay, this one is a voice note. Much easier. Thank you, Jen. Hey, Jess. Fix my mess, please. Okay? Girl, I love you. But anyway, fix my mess because girl, your girl done got herself into some mess. So back in 2010, I dated this boy. I was his first girlfriend. You know, we hit it off. We went together for like two or three years. I broke up with him.
To make a long story short, we recounted this year. It was like six months into the relationship. He ended up cheating in my eyes with another female. I caught another female coming out of his house later on that day. They went on a date. And so she had an ex-fiancé or fiancé or whatever. I guess that didn't work out between them two. And she came bothering my man. But anyways...
I don't know what happened because you know it takes two to tango. Anyways, so I feel like he's just been going between the two. I have went no communication. She came and bothered your man. Your man seemed like he wanted to be bothered too. He's trying to keep communication because of my child. And I really don't, you know, want the communication between him and my child because I feel like he's just doing it to like continue to
you know, have me in a loop with him. I have told him numerous of times that I'm sorry to break your bun or whatever bun you're trying to create with her, but you only knew her for six months. So, I mean, you know, it is what it is, you know, out of sight, out of mind. No, it's not his biological child. Um,
her dad really is not in her life so he really basically stepped up to the plate you know and really trying to be there but not trying to be there as well so I kind of put him on the game I'm like listen you treat my child princess treatment no matter what me you going through you know or whatever so I'm battling it right now I know I shouldn't take yeah because before I say something finish this girl
I know the kid shouldn't be involved in it, but I feel like he's being a baby daddy that I never had. And I don't like it. And I don't want my child's heart to get broke or whatever, you know, because of what he's doing. And I don't know what type of female she is. But it's kind of a messy situation because of, let me go back to catching her coming out of his house.
Well, I asked him who she was. He said there was a best friend. And, you know, I was like, okay. And we talked about it or whatever. And then we had a conversation a couple of days later after that because I, you know, cut him off for a minute. And when we had our conversation, he was like that it's around Christmas time of last year. So we had the conversation, you know, he said it wasn't about a best friend and all this stuff like that.
that he just wanted to be friends with me. And I was like, you know what? Cool. Okay.
Then little stuff started to get a little dry, you know, like the communication and stuff. But then when I fall back, he'll try to come back in, you know, or whatever. And so she's still having entanglements with her ex-fiancee and then talking wise because, you know, they have kids involved with their situation too. And...
Mm-hmm.
Like the days that I go without talking to him and we don't communicate, it's like I'm seeing it for what it is. And then when we do communicate, it's like he's saying that he's in love with me, he loves me and all that stuff and everything. But his actions are not matching what he's saying. So I'm like, you know what, I just be loud with the words.
At this point, like for real, for real, like it's 2024. We got to grow up. Like you, you're older than me. I'm older. I'm not getting younger. You know, she's what you want. Go be with her. Be happy. And I commend you to be happy. But don't continue to try to string me along or try to have, you know, entanglements with my child because, you know, you still have connection with me.
So am I wrong for trying to break that between him and my child? Because I feel like it's just a gimmick. I really do love him, and I really do see a picture with us, you know? If he just get his act together. And I wish I could tell you the whole entire story, but we ain't got that much time, you know? So just help me out, girl. Mm-hmm. I know I threw it all in there and went everywhere with the story, but yeah, it's a mess.
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Well, first of all, I want to play a little game and it's called, where is this person from? And I, in judging from the use and she said, communication. I would say Memphis. I would really say, I think she from Memphis. She sounded like Moneybagg Yo and Glorilla.
That's I swear you do girl, but that ain't no that ain't no shot to you because that's Baltimore people. We got a little accent too. Y'all already know that. Um, you also wrote me something. You said, hey girl. Hey, I will be waiting to hear back but to get deeper than the voice message. So old dude and me been, you know together since 2010.
Goddamn. Oh, yeah.
yeah for the first time and after I felt like damn why do we do this like now this relationship ain't gonna work oh because y'all did it y'all had sex okay but we both moved off history we continue to keep going into the relationship and last year on national boyfriend day I posted him and hours later a girl inboxed me and told me they've been having sex oh my god
Of course, I said something to him and he told me the truth and he did put her in her place. We talked and handled it like a couple should. Now, fast forward. He made a promise and said, that's not going to happen again. We were moving forward and then he wanted this relationship with me. That was the second month into the relationship. Okay, cool. Then we get around Christmas break. I'm a school teacher. So I was spending the break with him. So I text and was like,
Me and baby girl coming over to stay the break with you. He turns into a whole new person. And I was like, wait, huh? What you got going on? But I pretended that everything was cool. See, that's the bullshit I hate that we do. I mean, I'm sorry to cut you off. Like, come on with all this pretend shit. You said we grown. You got a baby. You know, this is not her biological dad and all this shit. But stop. Stop doing it. Let's stop pretending like shit is cool because that's.
How we indirectly let shit fall off our backs. We sweeping shit under the rug and shit. We pretending and shit. And we letting these niggas play with us. We're tolerating it. Stop pretending shit is cool.
Nip it in the bud right there. Continuing. I had in my mind the next day to pull up and see what type of time he was on. And then I seen old girl come out of his house. I didn't flip out, but boy, I wanted to. I'm glad y'all are actually like not flipping out, ending up in jail behind these bitches and niggas. I'm so glad. Then
Then found out he took her on a date the same day. Okay, so then I had to do some FBI digging to find out who her man is and if she was single, etc., etc. Then let's pause again. Why are we doing all that? Do it really fucking matter if she running around with somebody that's supposed to be your man? Why are we doing research on her? Why?
What you should have been doing was trying to see if she could fucking fight and all of that. And did she carry guns? And did she register to fucking shoot and all that shit to protect yourself if you want to go pop up? Why are we worrying about who the fuck she in a relationship with? Continuing. Comes to find out she was engaged to her ex-boyfriend of five years. So I was about to reach out to him, but I stopped. Thank God you did. The fuck? Mind your business.
But to make a long story short, me and my old dude had a conversation about everything. Even her. He kept saying she's a best friend, etc. But I know he, are you typing me the same shit you sent me?
But I know he'd been with her and stuff. But last conversation we had, he said he did love me and was in love with me. He just didn't want to get hurt again. He ain't want to get hurt again. But I'm guessing off of the 2010 relationship, he think I'll do the same thing again. Oh, because you cheated and shit. But I will post more recent conversation and you just give me advice on all this mess, girl, please. I just want to make sure my mind and your advice line up with each other.
Once again, thank you so much. Okay, so she sent me a message. So she sent me the message that she said, I don't need to read that to y'all because that's getting a little bit too on her business. All right. Child, this is the thing. I'm glad that you did let me know that he is not your baby's biological father because...
For a minute, I was about to chew your head off. You do not ever break a bond with the child and her dad or his dad because you still got feelings and he won't be a good man to you. No, no, no. That is not what you do. But he's been the only dad that your baby girl knows. And like you said, she only been in her life for six months. If you don't plan on ever dealing with this man ever again,
Then that's when you break it because, yeah, you're right. You know, you haven't been there. But I do understand what it's like to be attached to a child that is not yours. And if that child's father is not in her life already and she already built a bond with this man. Yeah, it can be out of sight, out of mind for you, but you can't decide that for your child. I don't know how old your baby is, but I know that you said that he's been in her life for six months. Okay.
And then I'm confused on your voice notes versus what you typed me. So did you just type what you said to me? It did seem like a lot of it was repetitive. However, there was a lot of things that you left out in the voice note that I did get while reading.
As women, girl, we can be private investigators. We can turn into detectives for these men. Yes, because they play games and sometimes we just feel like we got to get to the bottom of what the fuck is going on. But girl, when you go and do more research on a girl that he's cheating on you with, like trying to figure out if she's cheating on somebody with your man and who she's with. Like, you know too much about her.
That's obsession. That's too goddamn obsessed. You're too goddamn worried about her. Okay? Either he gonna fuck with her or he ain't. And it seems like you let this nigga spin you around so many fucking times, you dizzy.
And I don't like that. You don't need it. You got a baby girl. Okay. You should have taken the hint when you text him and said, man, baby girl going to come and spend his break with you around Christmas. And he turned into a whole new person. All right. So then motherfucker, you turn into a whole new person too. Cause who it is, who it is now. I'm not doing, especially not with my baby. You got to keep it pushing and you have to be an example for your daughter. Okay. I know we want love, but don't want it so bad that we get spun around so many times that we're dizzy. Okay.
Let's normalize not being dizzy for niggas. All right, we ain't doing it. He playing you. He's playing with you and he gonna keep playing with you because all he got to do is have a conversation with you. That's what I get out of these stories. All he got to do is sit down and tell you that he ain't gonna do it no more and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And you still, you up at night. I'm talking about investigating these bitches.
Let's cut that out because that's not what you're supposed to be doing. All right. Like I said, I know we all want to be loved and I'm being hard on y'all because this is not this ain't it. Y'all ain't hard enough on yourselves. That's why these men fucking get in your head and play with y'all like that. Ain't no way you don't pull up. You got a baby. You don't pull up on no nigga.
That may be with a bitch. You don't ever do that. Because you got to get home to your baby. The fuck? If he don't care about her that much, you got to care about her. You're her mother.
So move on from that shit and keep me updated, girl. Listen, we've come to the end of yet another Caffey Reckless episode with your girl, Just Hilarious. I will be fixing mess then, now, and whenever y'all need me to do it. Feel free to send in voice notes. And I also will be fixing mess periodically from time to time on Breakfast Club as well. Make sure you tune in every morning, Monday through Friday. You can catch Breakfast Club on YouTube and also on the iHeartRadio app.
And you can catch this podcast anywhere you can get a podcast at. And in my deepest pan voice. Peace.
Carefully Reckless is a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. I'm a good lawyer and I want to win. I think I killed JT.
She needs someone who's going to fight for her. If we don't follow the right plan, we lose. The hit series Reasonable Doubt, now streaming on Hulu. She was defending herself against a monster. Starring Emma Yatze Coronaldi. I'm the best lawyer you have ever worked with. And Morris Chestnut. I'm not gonna stop.
I think I love it, love it. Never underestimate the power of attorney. Always bet on tax. Reasonable Doubt. New episodes Thursdays. Streaming only on Hulu. Gear up for outdoor adventures with the 2024 Nissan Pathfinder. This midsize SUV is designed for epic journeys, offering spacious seating for eight, available panoramic moonroof, and an available intelligent four-wheel drive feature with seven drive modes to take your off-road experience to new heights.
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The fall season. We don't have to let it happen yet. Because summer doesn't stop in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. You can still get out and enjoy 60 miles of beaches, eat in the South's newest foodie haven with over 2,000 restaurants, and have endless fun at hundreds of attractions. Hold on to that sweet summer feeling a little longer at the beach. Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. Plan your trip at visitmyrtlebeach.com. That's visitmyrtlebeach.com.
Vitamin water is from New York. We needed a drink that can keep up with the music scene in the city. We got to see our favorite DJ perform in Brooklyn at 3 a.m. or sing karaoke in the village also at 3 a.m. Drink vitamin water. It's from New York.