Nip and Tuck, Who Gives a F**k?
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Intelligent all-wheel drive cannot prevent collisions or provide enhanced traction in all conditions. Always monitor traffic and weather conditions. Touring capacity varies by configuration. See Nissan Touring Guide and Owner's Manual for additional information. Always secure cargo. Welcome to Can't Believe Reckless, a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. Nice little ass back there. Nice little ass back there.

And just like that, we back on the air. Welcome to yet another episode of Carefully Reckless with your girl, Jess Hilarious. Today's episode is about plastic surgery. Now, it's about my bullshit too. I'm going to give y'all my shit because I know for the last few weeks I've been digging in y'all's shit. So I'm going to bring y'all into my world. Now, grab your tea because it's story time.

Now, up until 2016, I was flat chested. I'm talking about you would have thought my name was Justin if I didn't have a wig on. Real shit. I didn't have no titties. I was straight up and down like an iron boy. Nigga, I was built like a little boy. You know what I mean? At least I wasn't built like a grown ass man, but a little boy. Now, I always had a little booty. You know what I'm saying? I was always like cuffing a little something, but I never had hips.

And I never had to tase. All right. So I always said when I get old enough, I'm gonna get some implants in my boobies. Right. 2016, I did all my research that I could and I got in touch with this lovely black doctor. His name was Nicholas Jones. He's in Atlanta. His name is Dr. Nip and Tuck on Instagram.

Now, I've given y'all this information plenty and plenty and plenty of times. I went to get my surgery, right? Also told him at the consultation, I don't have hips. That's what I'm missing. I want a little bit of curve. I know that I don't have a lot of fat, but anywhere you can get fat from, please put it in my hip.

I can grow my ass. That's nothing like because I already got a little cuff. So all I need to do is eat more. That's all I need to do. So please just bless me with some hips. I'm tired of looking like Gina Waters. I need some hips, just a little bit of hippage. So at the consultation, this nigga told me you do not have enough fat for hips, not even a little bit of hips because.

When you take fat out of your body for a fat transfer, you have to let the fat sit and you have to let it drain. By the time all the drainage is done, your fat cells are not really as fat as you thought they were unless you was just a fat bitch, period. You know what I mean? And for the sake of that surgery, I really wish I was a fat bitch because my

My fat transfer did not go how I wanted it to go. When I got up on that table, I looked good. I had the body that I wanted. I had my titties. I had the, um, the splickety cat, cat cow, little hips. I was good. I had my fire high. They call it a fire high, you know, to give you this garment to keep you all together and shit, um, to keep you swelling down and all that. But I was swollen and I thought that that was the end result.

me being swollen. So I thought I had hips. I had hips for about a good two months after, you know, all my swelling went down and shit. And I was back how the fuck I was before my surgery. Like, I was mad as shit. I called the doctor. I said, Doc,

He said, I already know what you're going to say. Yes, you're small. I've been watching your videos. Your swelling has gone down. I told you that your fat transfer would not work because you don't have enough fat. So you basically made me take the fat out of your arms. I'm talking about ladies. They took fat out of my back, out of my arms, out of my kneecaps. I even told him, take the fat out my ankles if I had some. And I knew damn well I had no fat in my motherfucking ankles. But that's how bad I wanted a little curve, right? So he said, the good thing about it is,

When you start gaining weight because I added fat pockets into your hips, it will expand. You just need to gain weight. So I tried everything. I tried insurers. They did not work. I tried eating. It didn't work because my metabolism was so fucking high. All I do is eat, eat, eat. But all I do is run, run, run. All I do is I'm very active. So as I'm eating, I'm burning calories constantly. So that really defeated the purpose.

Now I got on this shit called a pediment. I took 10 milliliters three times a day. So that's 30 milliliters, right? You know, you got to eat a meal with every dosage of it. So I was eating three to four meals a day, taking 10 milliliters in the morning, 10 milliliters in the middle of the day for my lunch, and then 10 milliliters at night. And then I was eating right before I went to sleep, which is not good. That can also provoke diabetes, but it can also slap some weight on your ass. I got some weight on me in about three weeks.

That shit started working. But that shit also has other side effects. It gives you headaches. It drains you. It makes you tired. All that type of shit. All the shit that we do to gain weight, to get these perfect bodies that we love, that we see so much, that's thrown in front of us constantly from social media to TV to, you know, that's just we want to be what we see. Whether you want to admit it or not. Now, I didn't tell anybody I got a fat transfer. My sister told y'all.

that I got a fat transfer the reason why I didn't is because the shit didn't work now I don't know how many times I'm gonna have to tell this story but I'm gonna keep telling it because it's my motherfucking truth y'all can even ask Dr. Nip and Tuck he ain't gonna fucking lie the fat transfer didn't work like he told me it wouldn't work but our dumb asses think in our mind because we have love handles we're fat we got a little gut we're fat we got a double chin we fat

No, no, no, no, no, no. When they suck all that shit out, it still has to drain. So I was being hard. I had this nigga poke holes in me to find fat anywhere he could find fat for nothing. Right now, I take that back. Not for nothing, because he did tell me once I gain weight, I'll get the results that I want.

I said, yo, it got to be some type of shots. It got to be something. He said, no, no, no. I don't recommend it. That's why I love my plastic surgeon. That's why I love my doctor. Dr. Nicholas, he does not do the shit for the money. He knows I'm short. He knows that I wouldn't look good, unproportioned and shit. And that's why I hate when I see a lot of short bitches with big, big asses like Blac Chyna. Now, Blac Chyna is short, but this bitch is shorter than her, like short like Jada Chiefs.

getting asses like Nicki Minaj and fucking Blac Chyna. Like, why would you do that in U4 or 9? Like, why would you do that? And I know it's cliche, but bitch, you look like a aunt. Now listen, I'm telling y'all my story so y'all can know what the fuck really happened and y'all can know I'm not judging you at all. People get surgery for different reasons. Now listen, at first, plastic surgery was not that easy to get. It wasn't.

It's been normalized. So it's been discounted. The prices have come down. You can even make payments. Like, ain't that crazy? Like you can finance your ass. Like it's crazy. Now, if you stop making payments, I don't know if they'll report it, motherfucker. But I know that you can make installments. You can make payments. So they make it affordable for people. You know what I mean? I have no problem with people getting plastic surgery. My thing is, has it become overrated?

Has it become something that people only want because they see it, not because they're trying to fix self-esteem? Me, I thought I was walking around really looking like a little boy. So I've always wanted a little bit of hippage and some titties. Since I was 18, I've been asking my mother, asking, because I got the kind of mother you ask. I don't got the type of mother that you tell, oh, I'm going to get some titties. No, no, no. And I was 18.

So technically I was almost grown as a bitch. You know what I mean? I asked her, mom, can I please get some implants? Can I please get my boobs done?

She said no. She said no. She said no. I had to sneak even in my 20s to go get my boobs done because I know that she would not be happy with it. But that's what I wanted to help my self-esteem. That's what I wanted. I wasn't worried about what nobody else thought. I didn't do it for a nigga. I didn't do it because my friends were doing it. I didn't do it because I was looking on TV and I was like, oh, shit. Oh, I want those. I did it because I got tired of looking in the mirror.

Seeing two raisins. I only had nipples. What the fuck y'all wanted me to do? I had chest and nipples. That's it. It helped my self-esteem. Now, there are a lot of different factors that goes into plastic surgery. All right. People spend their last.

People were actually waiting for their stimulus checks to put the down payment on the shit. If you have to spend your last, so you have to scrape up change to get your body done. No, I don't think you should. I think it should be something that you can pay straight up.

You know what I mean? Now, that's just me. Because if you're spending your last on surgery, chances are you got other shit that you need to be worried about other than altering your body. Now, listen, I know that saying if you don't like something about yourself, change it. I'm all for that because that's what I did. But I had the money to do it. Not everybody does. So I'm not saying if you don't have the money to do it, don't do it.

But wait to the right time. You got people taking out loans to get their bodies done. You could be taking out loans to buy a house. You could be taking out a loan to start a business. You could be taking out loans to to pay your bills, to get your kids right. You know what I'm saying? And you better believe back in 2016, I wasn't making the type of money I'm making now, but I still didn't have to scrape up. Like, honestly, I was still living in the hood when I got my titties done.

But my son was taken care of. My bills were all fucking paid up. I was still giving my mother money, you know, because I had to pay her back for putting me through college. I always made a vow that I was going to pay my mother back for putting me through college, even giving me money to go to college. And I didn't even finish it. You know what I mean? I was still making responsible decisions.

I didn't spend my last on that shit. Now, again, I'm not judging you. I want to make it very clear. Ladies, I'm not judging you at all. That's the last thing I want to do. But you need to make sure you're in the right predicament. You got everything else together before you go lay on the fucking table and possibly lose your life. That's another factor that goes into plastic surgery. Now, before I got plastic surgery, of course, you go through all the scares and you do your research and you research a little too much. And I almost got scared out of it.

Because I seen a lot of people die on the table. This is what I've read, research and all that shit. It's like these plastic surgery groups on Facebook you can get into before you go and actually lie down and get your surgery and shit after your consultation. People have died. People have lost limbs. People have gotten diseases. People have like fucked themselves up if you don't pick the right doctor. And then a lot of the times it's not even the doctor. It's your body. You have to make sure your body is willing to accept that.

What's going on? Like, you know how you get a piercing and you get a keloid and it pushes it out? You know how you get a tattoo and the shit gets infected? Sometimes your body rejects implants. Honestly, I got keloids under my breasts because my skin is so sensitive. I thought that they were going to reject, but they didn't. I had to get treated for the keloid shit, which also Dr. Nip and Tuck also treats. They're almost gone now, the keloids, but I had keloids from it. It wasn't the doctor. It wasn't his work. It was my skin. You have to make sure your body can take the shit.

Kanye West's mother died shortly after getting her plastic surgery. That was crazy for those who didn't know. Yeah. Now she had, you know, other issues as well, but her body did not respond well to the surgery. And then ladies, if you're going to get surgery, get it for the right reasons. Not because your man desires the perfect body. Because if he does tell a nigga, go find the perfect body. Go ahead. Tell him that he ain't for you. You know what I mean? If you're going to do it, do it for yourself.

Don't do it for nobody else. Don't even do it because your favorite rapper got the perfect body. Don't even do it because what you see on TV is what you want. Do it because you really, really are not happy with yourself the way you look when you stand naked in the mirror. Because there are so many natural, beautiful bodies. So many natural, beautiful bodies.

You don't got to be curvy here and there. You don't have to be. No, you don't. There are other ways you can get that body too. You know what I'm saying? This is just the fast way. Now that's another fact that people being lazy, bitches being lazy, bitches would rather go spend 10K, 15K, land on the table, up to 20,000 instead of going to work out. Because a lot of bitches got the perfect body already. They just got the gut with it.

Bitch, if you don't get down on that motherfucking floor, hit a couple push-ups and hit a couple sit-ups and crunches and eat right, you can look like you just hopped off of a motherfucking surgery table if you do the right shit.

What's wrong with waist training? They didn't invent waist trainers for nothing. Shout out to Doctor Who. I got waist trainers online. I just restocked. So make sure y'all going, you're going to get those. I got slimmers and two pieces as well. It's like now, y'all. But no, for real, it's really things that you can do before you go and just jump on a table. I know it's fast, but recovery. You got the recovery. A lot of y'all got to be out from work six weeks and shit. And then it depends on how fast your body heals. Everybody heals differently.

Like I was up and back at it in like five weeks. That's because I heal fast. I'm like an X-Men. But I don't like when women mess with their face.

That's one thing. I don't like when women overdo it and fuck with their face. All right. I understand the BBL. I understand the boob implants. I understand getting your ass done. I do. I understand all of that. I understand it. But touching your face, your beautiful face, whether you're white, black, Puerto Rican, Hispanic, it don't matter. Asian, Greek, whatever. I don't know. Whatever you are. Oh, my God. I hate when people touch their faces.

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State Farm Insurance also cares about the growth of black communities. They're actively investing in programs and initiatives that help provide financial literacy, give early career advice, and grow black-owned businesses, thus leading to generational wealth, which helps protect the future of our communities. We want to build a future that we all can be proud of.

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State Farm believes that being better neighbors creates better communities and can have a long lasting impact. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. That brings me to Just Fix My Mess. Now I went on Instagram and I asked people, I asked y'all wholeheartedly, honestly, thoughts on plastic surgery. Is it overrated? Be honest. And y'all answered me. So I'm going to read off a couple.

Joy Isher 1210 on Instagram said, Nope, I just think you should do research and it should look natural. I'm with you. If I can look at you.

and not even know that you got surgery, but your body looks damn good, bam, your doctor did his motherfucking job. Your doctor did his job, and you have been successfully altered. When you look like you addicted to plastic surgery, that's when it's bad for you. I've been walking through airports, and I done seen bitches walking, but they butts not moving. Then I done seen bitches walking in Miami, and their asses falling out. Like, honestly. Zalika Butler on Instagram says,

It's becoming overrated and overdone. I personally don't see anything wrong with it. However, it's not looking realistic. And I thought that was the goal to enhance. Again, I agree with you, baby. D.Janae22 on Instagram. I honestly don't think it's overrated. The only thing that's overrated about it is the typical Instagram body that most people get. I didn't know you got your body done until it was mentioned on your podcast.

Yours looks so natural. Other than that, it's not overrated to me. And it's your body. Do what you want. Some people have a hard time getting the body they want. So why not pay for it if you are able to?

That's what I just said in a nutshell. If you are able, if you are financially able to do it and you got everything all together, your priorities are straight. Get that shit, man. But get it done the right way. I thank you, baby. I thank you, Destiny. She said my body look real like it look real natural. Yeah. Now, what she said about the typical Instagram body.

That's when the legs don't match. I playfully came for some of these celebrities who legs don't match, legs didn't match, legs still don't match. You know what I mean? That's when it's a problem, you know? And like I said, I'm over the whole making fun of people because I know for a damn fact

that nobody plans to get up and look like that. They go to sleep under the knife hoping for the perfect results when they get up. That's everybody. Because you wouldn't lay down there and purposely get up looking dumb as a bitch. Like, you don't want to look like a create player, like somebody that puts you together from other people and shit. Like somebody took body parts off of another bitch and put you together with it. You never want to look like that. I know that. Thoughts on plastic surgery? Is it overrated? Be honest. Go.

Underscore Savannah B11 on Instagram says,

But that's just me. That's not just you. That's just me as well. Y'all know I'm spiritual. I always find myself repenting and asking God to forgive me for altering my body, which he created to be like it is. I've always known who God was and I've always been connected to him, but I've never been committed to him like I am now. I grew up in the church and all of that, but we went so much. Thank you, mother.

We went so much. Robin Moore took us to church so much. Me and my brother made a promise in church, in the middle of service. Nigga, we ain't never going to church when we get older. And we just couldn't run from him. He always had his hand on me, even under that knife on that table. That's why I didn't die. So I got heart issues. I took a big risk getting my titties done, getting this fat transfer. I did. But I came out.

You know what kind of surprised me? Nobody said anything about touching their faces. I just don't like when these beautiful black women touch their faces and we can tell. You know what I mean? Clearly these faces of some of these celebrities have been altered because we see y'all with makeup on and then y'all slip up and do videos with y'all makeup off. And we see this shit. Like, carpooling.

Cardi B's face has been altered. She was so cute to me. She's still cute. She cute. She made a video saying that she didn't give a fuck about what the fuck we thought. And that's how she's supposed to be. But I give a fuck because at first I was good with her just getting her teeth done. I mean, but who the fuck am I? But since it's carefully reckless, let's just, you know, be carefully reckless. Her face is altering right before our eyes. That's just one example. Now let's kick it over to a brief break.

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State Farm Insurance also cares about the growth of black communities. They're actively investing in programs and initiatives that help provide financial literacy, give early career advice, and grow black-owned businesses, thus leading to generational wealth, which helps protect the future of our communities. We want to build a future that we all can be proud of.

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And that brings me to current news. Now we had K. Michelle. K. Michelle, I think, is one of the most honest people with her whole surgery process. No, with her whole surgery journey, shall I say. I'll say that. She admitted to getting her surgery, I think, in like a hotel room or some shit or whatever. She had got shots and then implants and she ended up almost dying from that shit, man. I recall her saying sometimes she would be in concert and wouldn't be able to move.

That's a bad thing. Like that shit kind of like scared the shit out of me, you know, but she's overcome several surgeries to get all that shit out of her. Thank God, by the grace of God, she didn't die getting that shit out. She could have died. She felt like she was almost about to die with that shit in her. And now she's back to the size that she used to be.

She's beautiful too. She's still healing. There was a video that circulated and shit that Wendy Williams' ass got a hold of with all that surgery going on up and down her P-body ass. And she was talking shit about K. Michelle. She's healing. She has all this excess fat. So that video that circulated that looked like her ass was falling out, there's no implant there. They had to take it out. So her skin is still stretchy, inflamed.

It's stretched. Our skin stretches when we get implants. Her skin has to like contract back like a muscle. So she's going to be flabby for a minute. But I do appreciate her honesty. She don't know how many girls she probably may get the reverse surgery. She don't know how many girls that she may feel better with that shit. Oh, I can't say she don't know. She probably do know. But I know a lot of people she may happy because she wasn't scared to give us the rail on that shit.

She said she made a big mistake by getting that shit. She got that shit out of her. And now she's natural. I love it.

Keep healing, baby. Kim Kardashian. At first, yo, I ain't gonna lie. I did not like Kim Kardashian's body. I felt like she was getting too much. Then when she got pregnant, it was like the plastic didn't agree with the pregnancy. I don't know. But I think her body settled. I don't know because I feel like her body is good now. It's nice. It's nice. Of course, it still looks like she had something done. She looks, you know, surgically put together. But it still looks good compared to how the fuck she used to look.

And it is a such thing as your surgery settling. Real shit. Nicki Minaj said it in the song. She said, I guess them ass shots wore off. Because remember, at one point in time, Nicki ass wouldn't move. She knew that. And after a while, when that shit got loosened up, it did move. Eventually, her butt was moving. So shout out to Kim Kardashian for, you know, the surgery settled.

Lil' Kim. Now listen, surgery can be very addicting. And I see a lot of people making fun of her. I've made fun of her myself, but over the years, people have like ridiculed and just been very cruel to, you know, Lil' Kim. Like I said, including myself. Very, very cruel to this lady. Now, you have to sit here and ask yourself, did Lil' Kim really intend on looking like that? And listen, don't get me wrong. She's beautiful. But I mean, like over the years, you've seen like

her transform to you know she had this face then she had this face then she had this face at one point unrecognizable you know what I mean we just knew who she was because she's always had the little Janet Jackson Michael Jackson voice she's always been I just want to say I just love everybody so much and I don't know like I just I don't know like she's always had that voice right

So that's how we know Lil' Kim. But you can't sit here and be like, oh, she wanted to look like that. That shit is very addicting. And she has yet to explain that. She has yet to do a documentary on why she kept fucking with herself. She was beautiful as fuck.

fuck back in the day. Brown skin, had the little mole, beautiful as shit. To me, she was fine as fuck. We will never know why she kept altering her body. And not even only her body or face. But we can't sit here and just keep being cruel. We gotta wait for her to tell us because I believe one day she fucking will. Because nobody ever, like I said, and like I'ma keep reiterating, wants to ever lay down and wake up looking crazy. So...

We just have to wait. Jada Chiefs. Little baby, baby mama. I love her body. She's well proportioned. She's very short. She has her hips. She got her little butt butt and shit. Like she look good standing straight up. You know what I mean? She looks good with no clothes on and shit. Don't ask me how I know this. I just know. But she is one of the most natural looking bodies that I've seen ever.

Shout out to Jada. She has a nice ass fucking body. For her to be 4'2". Iggy Azalea. Well, I've never seen her confirm if she had surgery or not, but I don't even know to say if she did. And I can't say she did. I can't say she didn't. But she looked the fuck good. And I don't even know if she ever had surgery.

I want to say she did, but I can't. I want to say she didn't, but I don't know. You know what I'm saying? But that's how it should be. If you have to question it and double take and really have in your mind, I don't know if she did, but it looked like she did. But no, it don't look like she did. She just looks like she's naturally fucking built perfectly. Then that's the perfect body to me.

Megan Thee Stallion, all natural, nice body. She tall as a bitch, but she looks the fuck good. She got a nice ass body. Now that's a perfect example of a fucking brick house. You know how your grandmothers and your mothers used to say, she's a brick.

house whole time that's Megan all day Megan tall ass got a nice ass body she built like a fucking stallion that's why her name is Megan the stallion and then you got the girl Jess hilarious now Jess her body look good too she got nice body and that bitch work out she work out

People will always blame the fact that she got a nice body on her surgery. But no, Dr. Nip and Tuck ain't had nothing to do with that. He ain't had nothing to do with it. He had a little something to do with it. But not everything. That bitch been eating. She been happy. Good sex. Good food. Home cooked meals. Working out. Toning up. Success. That should have give you a good body. Fasting. A relationship with God. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Everything. That'll get you a nice body. And I'm going to leave it on that. Listen, I want y'all to take this with y'all. If you don't do nothing else, make sure you're getting this shit for you. Because I got it for me. Now I'm not trying to lead a whole slew of people, you know, like a Moses or some shit. Like, oh, Jess said, if you don't got the money, don't do it. Nah, Jess said, if we get our priorities and our bills are all paid, then we can do it. No.

There are other ways you can get a nice body without jumping under the knife. But if you got your shit together and you got the money to do it and it's really fucking with your self-esteem and you are tired of looking in that mirror and you don't like how you look, go and change it. Just go and change it. There's no penalty in that. Fuck it. I did it because, like I said, I wasn't even Jessica. Nigga, I was Justin. Fuck. I turned myself into Justin. To me. Nice.

And that's it for this episode of Carefully Reckless. Make sure y'all tune in to episode 10. We coming up on episode 10 next Wednesday, hump day. Make sure y'all listen. I love y'all and I know y'all love me back. Peace.

If he cute, I might just pop it. Got your bitch asking for pictures. If she ugly, I'm going to crop it. I just left outside her office in L.A. I made a plan. I like niggas with tattoos who carry guns. Who can I stop? And he like, and I'm like, homie. Homie. He be like, and I'm like, homie.

I'm a good lawyer and I want to win. I think I killed GT.

She needs someone who's going to fight for her. If we don't follow the right plan, we lose. The hit series Reasonable Doubt, now streaming on Hulu. She was defending herself against a monster. Starring Emma Yatze-Coronalde. I'm the best lawyer you have ever worked with. And Morris Chestnut. I'm not gonna stop. I think I love it, love it. Never underestimate.

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