Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
Greetings, Earthlings. This extraterrestrial is Sam Sanders. And I'm Zach Stafford. And I'm Saeed Jones. And you, my dears, are listening to Vibe Check. Vibe Check.
I can't believe this is the last week of the year already, but you know we could not leave 2022 without giving you a special episode. We are not leaving this year without a few more declarations, judgments, recommendations. We're going to talk about our favorite moments of the year, our favorite pop
culture, staples, and also what we are leaving behind and what our intentions are for 2023. So we're going to talk about like what stays here and what we're taking with us. But before we get into all of that, sisters, how are y'all feeling? Zach, how about you? How you doing?
I'm good. I'm ready for this year to be over. I'm like, and we're going to talk about like intentions and what we want next year to be. But I feel like this was the first year of, you know, pandemic, but also tiptoeing out of the house and getting back into it. And I'm finally feeling ready to step into a new version of this life in a COVID world.
So yeah, I'm just ready to like celebrate with y'all. We are together in Mexico City. I'm excited. I'm happy. I'm glad it's the end of the year. I'm ready to drink tequila. I'm ready to eat more tacos, all those things. So I'm good and ready. How are you, Simon? I feel good. I think, you know, as this year wraps up, I'm trying not to...
run away from my feelings, run away from my accomplishments. And I think you're absolutely right. You know, 2022 has been a bizarre, liminal year that word's been coming up in conversation a lot lately. But I think all of us has felt a little bit like caught in between two realities and
And to publish a book and to have it come out this year and to be on the road and to, you know, go to book festivals and all these, you know, wonderful cultural events that I haven't been able to do for like two and a half years. It's been pretty surreal. And so I'm happy I got to do it. But also, yeah, as this year wraps up, I feel like I need time to like process what just happened, you know, and not just go, go, go. So I'm grateful that...
December is giving me an opportunity to slow down, to have some time to rest, some time to be with y'all and friends and just reflect. Because, yeah, honestly, I don't know how I feel about everything that has happened. I've been so busy on just getting it done, you know, so I'm grateful to kind of think for a bit. And that's a privilege. That's a privilege.
Sam, how about you? You know, I'm feeling good. I went home to Texas last week to do second Thanksgiving with my mother and my brother and the family down there. And they kind of were just like, okay, I guess. They kind of moved on from Thanksgiving. But I was like, damn it, we're doing this. And we did a bunch of barbecue. Sometimes you got to wrangle people together. We're doing this. We're doing this.
I had this moment getting back to LA that has kind of been setting my intention since the moment. And I think it's going to be my vibe for 2023. I was going to go say bye to my mother and give her some flowers before going to the airport. But my schedule worked out in a way to where I could look for something else to do or get to the airport like two hours early, which I never do. I got to the airport two hours early and I was like, oh,
This is the move. Yeah. And so like, literally, I'm like, oh, baby, this is we rolling now. What did you do at the airport for two hours? Because here's my issue. This is the issue. I see the benefits of getting to the airport early and not being rushed. The issue is a lot of airports, especially at this point over the last couple of years with, you know, economic, they suck. Like they're not pleasant. Yeah.
To me, and even the lounges lately have been overcrowded. So what did you do? Lounges are too full. Delta has said that their lounges are too full now and they're going to cut people off. It's just ratchet. I'm like, what's the reward for me showing up early? No, here's what happened to me. The San Antonio airport is actually pretty nice and never too full. They have a lot of restaurants. They do. A lot of good restaurants. Good coffee, good brisket. But I have been on the fence about thinking about writing a book for years. Oh!
Breaking news. I didn't know this. I wrote the first part of my proposal. I wrote the first part of my proposal because I was there early. How did you not tell us you were thinking about doing a book? You can't say it until you've written it. You can't say it until you've written it. That's true. That's my rule. Anywho, all this has given me the intention of like, oh, Sam, the vibe for me next year is to avoid any unnecessary feeling of being rushed.
I don't like to be rushed. And if I can avoid it in my own life and in my own schedule, do that. Life is going to rush me enough. If I can build into my life two-hour airport breaks, you know, metaphorically, that's my vibe next year. Metaphoric two-hour airport break. I love it. I love it.
Well, before we jump in, I just want to tell everyone for the last time this year that we thank you so much for the fan mail, for the tweets, for the DMs, for the everything. Please keep it coming in the new year and we'll keep engaging with you. And if you'd like to send us some notes, email us. You can email us at vibecheckatstitcher.com. So with that, shall we jump in? Let's go. Let's do it. Let's do it.
This might be the hardest segment that we tape all year because we're going to have to talk about our favorite things of the year, but we only get two things a piece. And I had a lot of things that I loved in 2022. So we're going to keep it tight, nice, tight, and right, and talk about our two either favorite cultural moments of this year or biggest, most infamous cultural moments of this year.
I think we got to have Zach go first because you've got the two biggest heavy hitters and I want you to start with the bad one. I want you to start with the bad one. Go ahead. Oh, I get to start with the bad one? Okay, fine. Fine by fine. Was it bad? I don't know.
I don't know. Well, I think that's what we'll talk about. What actually was this moment? So the biggest moment for me this year in culture, and maybe rivals my second one, happened on March 27th, 2022. If you don't know that date, and it does feel very long ago, that was the day of the Oscars. And it's also the night in which Will Smith took his black ass on stage and slapped the shit out of Chris Rock. And no one has stopped talking about it since. And Will Smith said, Philly stand up. Yes, he did.
He said, gritty who? I'm gritty. But if you don't remember what exactly happened, this controversy began. If you don't remember what happened, you don't listen to this podcast. I do not need to explain this. I refuse. TLDR, Jada Pinkett is a baddest. She sent Will Smith up to the stage and he slapped her out of Chris Rock. And then he won Best Actor. And now Will Smith has...
disappeared from Hollywood, but is now re-emerging as of this quarter after an interview with Trevor Noah and his movie Emancipation on Apple coming out just this month. So what do y'all think about that? What did you think about the slap? But mostly, what did you think about what the slap means for culture, entertainment, and what we're feeling today from it? This is the thing about the meaning. My favorite tweet about the whole endeavor came from Amanda Mull of The Atlantic, who
And she basically said, and I'm paraphrasing here, sometimes weird things just happen and all you can say is, damn, that was weird. Maybe there's no greater meaning to this. Right, right.
Maybe he just had an off night. Maybe there's no profound revelation at the deep. Yeah. And like one thing that really annoyed me in the aftermath of the slap is that every newsmaking institution in the world needed to find every black person who had ever written or talked about news and see what you think about it.
I was turning down media requests about the slap for a month. And it's just like, no, I hate this. Like y'all weren't reaching out to me that much after George Floyd died. Yeah, I think that's what, and when I say good, I mean something that's dense, that's rich and abundant, not necessarily morally good. But that's what good pop culture is. It becomes something, you're right, Sam, I think often there's actually no meaning at the center.
It's kind of like, I mean, we're going to talk about this movie in a second, but everything, everywhere, all at once. It's the everything bagel with the nothing in the middle. But good culture becomes something that resonates with people in all walks of life, you know, all age groups, all generations, all ethnicities and identities. And then everyone like begins to build and assign meaning around it in a way that I think ends up being more fascinating than the catalyst. Yeah.
You know what I mean? And I think the slap, you're right. Like I was not like at the end of the day, I'm wholly uninterested in trying to parse what Will Smith or Jada or Chris Rock were thinking in that moment. Seemed like very human, embarrassingly human to me, you know? Yeah. And that's where like, I think that was the big upsets.
obsession was, is this a human moment or is this like a pop culture moment that tells us something about ourselves? Because people were looking at it and they're like, oh my God, what does this say about being a comedian, violence we face, cancel culture, all this stuff. And there was the other part of Twitter that said, they should have just dealt with this offstage as like black people. Black people should have just handled this together. And I was in the middle being like,
what happens if he was just like hyped from the night and just hit him and forgot where he was? And it is what it is. And it could be that simple. But I think we live in a world that's like, no, I gotta, this needs to mean something because I care so much about it. And I don't know why I care so much about it.
The funniest take that I heard in the aftermath of the slap, one of my good friends, Katie, also a journalist, she was like, Sam, when I saw the slap, all I really thought is it's probably too early for us all to be getting back together post-pandemic. We shouldn't be outside yet. If there was ever a sign. We're not right yet.
We should be inside a little bit longer. But I do think this story, every few years you get like what I call a perfect news story and it checks all the boxes. It's a story about race. It's a story about Hollywood. It's a story about sex and gender. It's a story also about sports because he won for a tennis movie. It's a story about business in the industry of Hollywood.
This story literally could end up in any section of the paper. Right. And then also the world's greatest living athlete, Serena Williams is sitting in the audience right next to her sister. And this is a film about their father right before the end of Serena's, whatever this era of her career is, you know, the
It's just like all the kind of, you're right, stars align in terms of- - As they're presenting the best documentary feature at the Oscars, which went to Questlove for Summer of Soul, which was about black history, black movies. So it was just too perfect and it just kind of sits there. So we got to leave it there for that one because my next one will get us equally as excited, I think. And I would argue the biggest cultural moment of the year, which I will give the crown to, is Beyonce, Nels Carter releasing Renaissance.
Without question. It just, you know, we still don't know. The truth is, this is the, this is the cultural moment of the year. Let's be clear. I will say it is a testament to her power that she got a number one single with Break My Soul with no video. And the second single per se is Cuff It. It's in the top 20 right now. It's one of the 20 biggest songs in the country. No video, just motherfuckers TikTok into it.
online. That's all we got. She's just using her voice. And that's why it's such a major moment that's going to last forever and ever because she's like slowly giving to us, like piecemealing it over and over. And the fact that we allow her and we still get excited. And if you even like see a fake tweet that says, oh my God, the album's coming, your blood pressure spikes just shows you how this moment is like the cultural moment.
And only Beyonce could have done it. Because not even Adele. Adele gives us moments. Her TikToks of her show these days are wonderful, but it's still not kind of omnipresent like Beyonce and Nils Carter is right now. And what I love about this year of Beyonce is that she's doing several things at once that most pop artists couldn't even do one at a time.
Yeah. So she made an album where she's never sounded better. Right. She's made an album that is more musically dense and rich and better produced than anything she's ever made before. So to make the best album of your career, that's enough on its own. But usually when artists do that, it's also not as commercially viable and as enduring and as popular as this album has been. Right? Yeah. So she makes an album that's her best work yet, and it's a hit, and it's a hit with no videos. Yeah.
And she's at this level of her career where the Grammys have basically already said, we're going to give you all the awards, girl. All of them. And they would have to be lying to our faces. Exactly. Yeah. No other pop star at the height of their powers has done all of the great things Beyonce has done this year with no videos. Like, so besides this being an artistic triumph,
To see this woman be really famous and really good at it and really successful for more than 20 years now, my hat's off to your strategy. Your strategy in this industry is commendable. Also, can I praise, and this is something that a nitpick that's been building on me, I might be talking about it more in the new year. I also want to praise the lyrics of the album. I think...
I think the art of lyricism in pop music is kind of going away. Everything is starting to sound like it was written on people's iPhones, like it's like snatched from TikToks. And I've missed the artistry of the kind of relatable but still kind of elevated. That's a very difficult sweet spot to kind of hit. You know what I mean? Like she's not trying to be some like mystic witchy Florence Welch person. There's a quality in the songs, lyrics like I want to go missing, which I just think
It's just like a brilliant lyric. I just have come to really appreciate that because you're right. It's like the longer you listen to the album, the more you're rewarded because on every level, you know, she's giving us the best. And it's the only album in the history of the world that I like listening to the album as a whole. I hate the pieces. I hate when like, cover comes on by itself. Yeah, I can't put it in. I'm waiting for the next song.
Yeah, I want them all together. So there we go. That's why it's just so powerful. So it's time for us to take a quick break, but stay tuned. We'll be right back. We are back and we are continuing this conversation about the biggest moments of the year. Saeed Jones, what are your things you're loving this year? I decided to pick two.
two pop culture fave staples that I just think brought us a lot of joy and can still bring us a lot of joy as we revisit them in the coming years. The first is the film Everything Everywhere All at Once starring Michelle Yeoh. I mean, y'all know, I feel like we've talked about this film in a lot of different iterations.
The performances. The entire ensemble, it's not just Michelle, it's Stephanie Hsu, Jamie Lee Curtis, Jenny Slate, like just an incredible cast. But also, I just feel like, you know, obviously Marvel and that juggernaut has been obsessed with the idea of multiverses. But also, I think because of all of us being in this kind of cultural stasis for the last couple of years, it feels significant to have...
Yeah.
I love all of that. I love when a piece of pop culture, a film, a movie, an album, whatever it is, it's good on its own inherently. But also the parts are good, like the individual performances are incredible. Even down to the props, the little trophy that Jamie Lee Curtis' character has, like the payoff with that. But then also that it's also resonating.
It's not just entertaining. I felt more in touch with my humanity and more equipped to kind of acknowledge what I had been feeling and the world that, you know, we're all kind of living in together. Yeah. And I would say what I get so excited about with the film is that in a year of lots of queer films rolling out, so...
spoiler alert, which fun fact is not bad. Is a very good, if you want to go cry in a theater, go see spoiler alert. And this movie, and I would say this movie has helped us see what the future of a queer film can be and what a coming out story can contain within it. That it doesn't just need to be the moment of, mom, I'm gay. And you see the fallout of that.
but it can be more artistic. It can be more elevated and more interesting and see that coming out as the beginning of the story, not the end of the story. So I just think what it's done for queer storytelling is tremendous. And it was done by two men that don't currently identify as queer and they were able to work with queer people to make it. So I just think it's a triumph on every level.
And it's a triumph because one, it became a sleeper hit with no existing IP. It felt like it was totally new and came out of nowhere. Right. And it centered Asian Americans. You know, this was a movie that was written for a man. They wanted the lead to go to Jackie Chan and they wanted the daughter to be played by Awkwafina. Right.
Any executive seeing the specs for this film on paper would say, because they're so conservative and scared right now, well, this won't work. This won't work. This won't work.
an Asian woman's a lead, but it's an action movie, but it's not MCU, but it's also a love story, but it's also about parenthood and what this won't work. And yet it does like that to me is as impressive as just how good the film is. Like it's not supposed to work, but it does. And I, it makes me feel hopeful about the movie industry. I think for a while I was down on like the state of the industry and I thought they only could make horror movies and MCU stuff, but
But to see this film succeed gives me hope for more films like this. I love that. And absolutely online, the theme of the hope. And I love that. Isn't that great when you can enjoy something and also feel better, more broadly? Because my second choice for 2022 is a video game by Santa Monica Studios, God of War, Ragnarok. I just finished playing this game just the other day. I can go back and play the side quests and all that kind of stuff because it's never really over.
But I finished the main story over the weekend, and it's just so beautiful. It's storytelling at its best. Like I was saying, like lyrics. Let's get down to the sentence level in terms of writing. At one point, a character says, death can have me when it earns me. Woo!
Come on, somebody. Come on, somebody. That's poetry. Isn't that good? It's poetry. The lyricism. It's all about mythology. And so the history of storytelling is very much a part of it. But also this is the second part of a kind of two-part installment in this franchise. And it's ultimately about a father and son learning to love each other.
And learning to love each other in the wake of grief after the wife, mother, or Faye dies in the last game. Like, the last time we saw these characters when they were introduced to us was the mother's funeral, you know? And so it started with the idea of, like, what does it mean to be grieving as a partner
when you also have a kid you now need to take care of, right? And you're two human beings grieving in different ways. So now in the second part to see the characters come back together and the scale, oh my gosh. And I just feel like if I were a, and y'all know I stay in Marvel, you know I'm a Marvel nerd, right? But I feel like if I was a Marvel executive,
And I saw this game and played it and saw the depth and the nuance they were able to bring to characters like Thor, like Loki, like Odin, who obviously are all over the MCU. I would be embarrassed because maybe they made these characters worse.
real. You know what I mean? And I was thinking about so much of Sam, like what you said, where you were like, you know, there'd be these incredible moments in Wakanda forever, and then the movie would rush away from it. And I was really struck that because of the nature of video games and the freedom and structure, there would be these soft moments. And
And you'd be able to stay and linger. The game is okay with silence. Like, yes, there's the fighting and there's actually like a huge war at the end. There are dragons and all of that. But there are also moments of just like quiet devastation, quiet beauty and awe. And I was just like, wow.
And so I just – I don't know. And I want to say this to people who don't think they are video game people and can't see themselves getting into this. Here's my tip. There's a mode. There's a play mode that you can do with these games now where you can choose Give Me Story.
Oh, that sounds fun. That's literally like make it as easy as you would love it. It's great. Like if that's all what you're and you get to like fight and play and there are a lot of puzzles and stuff. But it's like these games, I think as millennials, we were kind of like made to feel like video games were only for a certain type of person. Mm hmm.
And thus a lot of us feel locked out. But I'm here to tell you that this is a great game and I know y'all would love it. So that's the end. I will talk about it for the rest of the day. Okay. I grew up being a gamer. I love PlayStation so much and I love RPGs. I would be addicted to this. Because Saeed, you love it so much, which means I would love it. I do love it. It's like I play one or two games a year. I'm not playing like constantly. Really, like I said before in another episode, I did the same with video games for the winter. Right.
When I'm home a lot. So it's kind of, I tried to be like when it's summer and I know I want to be running out and, you know, and all that kind of stuff I'm not playing, but yes, it's worth it. It's worth it. Y'all. All right, Sam, take us to the mountaintop. I know you will. I have two picks and Sam,
This is not my favorite album of the year, but it's a close second. And I want people to know about it. So I'm talking about it now. Of course, my favorite album this year was Renaissance. But the new album from this French-Belgian pop artist named Stromae is truly incredible. I tell my friends when I'm like listening to Stromae, I say he makes perfect global pop. He makes like World Cup music.
It's music that sounds like it's from 15 different countries at once. It's brilliantly produced. And he does this wonderful thing with most of his songs where the song sounds happy, but the lyrics are really kind of deep and introspective. Because the only song I remember was like from 2015. Was it Papa? All about his dad and feeling the band. Well, you listen to it. I was like, it's a fucking gem.
And then I looked up the lyrics and I was like, oh my God, this is my father. Why'd you leave me? Really difficult relationship with his father. Yeah. Yeah. So this new album is more of that, but on an even more dramatic scale. Some of the songs on here, it feels like he's scoring a prestige drama. It's so dramatic. My favorite track from the album is this song called L'Infair.
And it starts out as this like piano ballad, but then right before the chorus comes in, this EDM almost synth drop like punches you in the throat. It is my favorite musical moment of the year. It's peak drama and I love it. But this album should be on everyone's list.
Play this album. Love this album. It's all in French. Google the lyrics. You can do it. Stromae. It is an incredible, incredible, incredible album. It's called Multitude. And let me say this. Stromae is fine too. He's really fine. I feel like very genderqueer. My second pick for the year is another piece of art that I just felt was perfectly realized and should have been watched by more people. And that is the really, really, really, really, really great Apple TV Plus show Severance.
- Yes. - Saeed, you also love it. - Yes. - This show is the fucking truth. - Woo! - I still have not watched it and everyone talks about it. I'll do that now. - Maybe get into it. - So this show, there's a few things I love about it, but the most important part of it to me, the best part of this show is that it feels like the whole team that made it sat in a dark room with no outside influence until it was done. They built this world that feels close to our world, but not quite.
And in feeling so separate and apart, they're able to tell the story without it being bothered or burdened down by any current pop culture references.
Like you kind of know what year it's in. Yeah. Like you kind of know what year it's in, but you're not sure. You kind of know where it's set, but you're not sure. And that ambiguity and like facelessness of the world allows you to just live in it. Right? And on top of that, it's really, really beautiful. Wonderful cinematography. And the plot moves at a perfectly delectable speed. Mm-hmm.
At first, you think it's moving really slow. And then you realize it's been moving faster. And then you get to the finale. It is the best cliffhanger I've seen in the last decade. The stress. Look. Because, look, Usam and I are trying not to give anything away. But incredible. I mean, that's the thing at this point. You go, how many different ways are there to do a cliffhanger? It's like they found a new way. They found a new way.
And the cliffhanger was so good, they got hate mail from fans being like, this was too cliffhanger-y. It hurt me too much. And Ben Stiller is a good director. This is what I'm hearing. He does a great job with this. I love that. I like that man a lot. I really have been revisiting his movies. He's wonderful. Yeah. A thing I've noticed in a lot of shows that are happening right now, they try to be too tapped into the zeitgeist.
And that makes them suffer. Like, I want to love this Gossip Girl reboot, but every third line is like a reference to some tweet or some TikTok and I just can't invest. Severance does this wonderful job of offering a commentary about our day in life right here by being totally separate from it.
They create a separate world, which is the best way to reflect our current world, if that makes sense. And since I've been focusing on lyrics, sentences, and line works throughout this, one of my favorite TV lines of the year is Patricia Arquette on the show, an incredible performance in disgust at another character. At one point, she says, if you want a hug, go to hell and find your mother. Woo!
I love that. Okay, I'll watch. You gotta watch. I will. Those are my picks. All right. Those are our picks for the year. We're going to take a break right now. But when we come back, we'll have some inspirations for the new year. Yeah. Stay with us.
All right, we are back. And since it is the end of the year, we've decided for our determinations, for our intentions as we kind of cross the barrier into the future. We wanted to first make note of something we each want to leave behind in 2022. It could be a person, a place, a thing, an existential framework. Who knows? But we're leaving something behind.
And then we wanted to share an intention, a goal or determination for 2023. So I love that. I love that. Zach, do you want to get us started? - I'll get going, yeah. So for me, the word that is kind of encapsulating my mood is scarcity. And I want to leave that behind.
Because I feel as if when the pandemic hit, I was the editor-in-chief of The Advocate. I was hosting AIM2DM. I was working a lot and there was a lot of work abundance. And I was at things all the time. There's a bunch going on. And the world stopped and I felt very fearful with everything going on. I was like, am I never going to work again?
Will there not be a life for me after this? Is media changing? And then Twitter was falling apart. And I was like, what happens with life without Twitter? Everything just feels like it's falling, falling, falling. And it's put me into a scarcity mindset where I'm rushing to take more on. I feel like I'm storing more food. Everything feels like we're at the end of the world. And I think especially after...
reading your work, Saeed, I want to like let the scarcity go and just be like, you know, if this is the end of the world, if this is whatever it is, I want to at least have abundance in this. I want to be able to have joy and happiness and friendships and love. And so I think I'm trying to leave behind that scarcity mindset that was making me feel really anxious and stressed about everything and making me do everything that came my way. I was like, okay, this is the last time I can do this. I have to do this. I have to do this.
and it's moving me towards what I'm gonna call my year of maybe. So, people probably- - Yes! I like that, I like that. - Sam, the way your face just- - I'm like, I'm stealing that. - Profile. - Because Shonda Rhimes, you know, she famously said her year of yes.
which a lot of people have run with where they're like, yes to this. Yes, I'll go on this trip. Yes, I'll take this job. And let me tell you, I have been to that mountaintop. It is exhausting to say yes to every single thing. But what I'm trying to do more is to hear requests, whether it's to hang out for drinks, to go to a party, to go to something. And instead of responding with that emotion,
immediate reaction I have of either yes or no. I want to take a second and sit in it and think about it and be intentional about everything that I do, whether it's a work project or just getting a drink with someone I haven't seen in a while. To be like, am I in the mindset to sit with someone for two hours and really listen to them?
or to share with them. So I think like, I just really want to live in a maybe that like anything's possible. Just give me space to think about it and consider it. Because I just think we all live in this world that there are people say to you, just do it, just try it, just take and take and take. And you know, I'm done with that for now. So letting go of scarcity and leaning into maybe. That's me. I love that. She said, call me. Call me, maybe.
Oh my God, Sam, what are you thinking? Not to take it back to the two hours early to the airport, but to take it back there. I think the energy I want to- You've been there all this time. You've just been sitting at your gateway. Still at the airport. Still at the airport. But a thing I keep thinking about and the energy that I want to have for 2023 is life is already anxiety-inducing enough.
how can I build my life and my schedule and my day to day in a way that I'm not self-imposing any more anxiety? And I think what I felt in that moment where I just got to the airport early and was early,
It was like this light went on and it's like some of the anxiety in life comes to us regardless. Some of the anxiety in life we choose by overextending ourselves, by saying yes to too much, by being around folks we don't want to be around, by doing things we don't want to do.
And so one of the questions I want to ask myself before I say yes to any number of things next year is, will this give me anxiety? And if that's the case, do I need to do it? Do I want to do it? Or do I think I'm supposed to do it? And usually a lot of the stuff that would stress me out the most, I can actually say no to.
So just like not bringing on any unnecessary anxiety. That is my goal for the new year. And it's kind of, you know, Zach, you're saying maybe a lot next year. I think I'm going to be just saying no a lot more next year. Just no. Just no. Mama's tired. Mama wants to rest. Go outside, touch grass. When I think about your schedule, Sam, you're doing two shows. You're just doing so much that I do think now is perfect for you.
The thing is, something I've learned, and so much of what you're saying is resonating, hesitancy is vital information. It's worthy information. You know, sometimes we might be hesitant because an idea is ambitious and we know there are real challenges, but it's still worth taking on. But that hesitancy is alerting us to the stakes. Sometimes we're hesitant because—
because we know we don't actually want to do something and we feel there are other pressures, you know, kind of pushing us maybe a little bit further than we want to go. But I think, yeah, it's like, it's worth listening to. I don't think it's like it has to end with hesitancy, you know, just because you're nervous.
don't do something well that's not quite it but yeah it's like i just think so often we've been made to feel that we're supposed to like disregard the like in our stomach and i'm like oh no let's let's talk to that for a moment and see what it has to say yeah it's your interior knocking at your door being like hey girl i have something to add here i have something to say and we should probably listen to those things more it doesn't mean it's a no i think people avoid that anxiety because they're like well no if i think about it too much then i won't go it's a
No, like you should think about it to have a real check-in with yourself. Cause you may actually want to say yes and go again tomorrow. You don't know, but definitely listen to your body when it's saying, hey girl, I have something to share with you. Yeah. Well, and also what I'm really trying to internalize more and more is that like in our life, there are seasons, right?
There are seasons of growth. There are seasons of retraction. There are seasons of bigness and seasons of smallness. And being aware of what season our body needs to be in, that should guide us. A lot of times we see our careers and our lives as constantly always moving upward and forward at the same velocity. It's a tango. It's a winding road. It's an unbeaten path. There's no need to be rushing all the fucking time is what I'm saying. We'll leave it there.
Say amen. I guess I would preface this by saying, I think that even if you don't say or do something explicitly, I think the spirit with which you live informs how things play out. And I think I've had a spirit of apology. Maybe we'll call it survivor's guilt for much of this year. I've really struggled with acknowledging that
How happy I am to be alive. How happy I am to be doing work that I believe in, having that work acknowledged. I just feel like, and again, I haven't, I hope I haven't been running around saying it. I hope you haven't been like, yeah, every time we talk to Syed, he's like, but inside I've had this, it's difficult to pinpoint. And earlier when I was talking about reflection, this is part of what I want to use to reflect upon. But I want to leave behind this
apologizing for my abundance. I deserve to be here. I deserve to thrive. I deserve to do more than merely survive. And being ambitious, being successful, being creative, I am lucky enough to be able to continue to do so. I guess I felt a sense of shame. I'm just like, God, so many people aren't. So much has happened. And it's just like it turns every existential sentence into a run-on sentence.
because I'm putting in a bunch of commas and trying to, well, you know, and then everyone does, you know, and I just can't just say, I'm proud of myself. I want to just, I want to leave behind that tension, if that makes sense. I love that. And I'm proud of you for saying that because someone asked me recently about you that is a friend of both of ours. And I forget who it was, but I said, I've never seen Saito happy before.
And it wasn't when I said it, I remember thinking it's not because of Haas only. Like Haas is part of it, but it feels like there's a lot happening. And I think as you were talking just now, I agree that there seems to be a singularity in your life for the first time that I've seen in eight years that I've known you, where you seem to love every aspect of everything going on. Like the work feels good, the love feels good, the friends feel good, the home feels good. And I think most people never hit that singularity. And the fact that you, after going through so much over your life, got there, you should be proud of that.
of that. And I'm so grateful that you showed up today. Yeah, and I'm tired of fighting it. I mean, so much of what you both have said, you know, it's trauma. It's a lot going on where I think we're made to feel that, like, the other shoe's going to drop any minute now. Don't get too excited. Don't get too happy. You're inviting trouble. You know what I mean? And it's like, well, at some point, the truth is the truth. And the truth is things are going pretty well. And maybe they won't always be that way, but I want to acknowledge that now.
Well, and I gotta say watching you have such a good year and be just doing well on all counts right now. I love to see you do that because it's inspiring to me. And I know it's inspiring to others when we can see someone who is living in their abundance and loving their life
It rubs off. It rubs off. There'll be days where I'm like about to stress myself out or about to not be grateful for something. And literally I'll feel myself channeling y'all's positive energy, channeling other people in my life who are just...
on a good plane. So it's not just for you, Saeed. It's not just for you. You live in your abundance. It is inspiring people more than you know, is what I'll say. I love that. I love that. Well, then for my intention, I've been trying to, with all this in mind, kind of distill it as best I can to a sentence because of the desire for that clarity. And so my sentence is, I am determined to live vibrantly in rhythm with my purpose and my needs. Yeah.
And my needs. That part. And my needs. Love it. That's what I'll be working on. Well, you know, pop culture moment of the year, babe, it was Vibe Check. Hey, now. Hey, now. That's tea. That's tea. So much to be able to come together and these conversations and, you know, it just, you're right. It's like, it bounces off. It really is a dialogue, you know, and I've learned so much from all of you and I'm just like really, really grateful. To Snickers and beyond. To Snickers.
To Snickers and beyond. Look, we weren't going to leave. Look, Snickers are coming with us. Come on, Snickers. We're going into the future. If I'm not reading ads for Snickers next year, somebody messed up. Don't leave that money on the table. Well, that was fun. Listeners, we want to know what you are leaving behind and what your intentions are for this new year. Email us at vibecheckatstitcher.com.
Well, that's our show and happy new year to everyone. I hope y'all are having bubbles if you drink or something else if you don't. Well, until next year, thank you for tuning in today. This was the last episode of the year of Vibe Check. Although we've come to the end. Don't speak that. Don't speak an end on this. We need to keep this going, okay? Just of the year. Just of the year. Just of the year.
And to keep it going, you should show your love of the show and support us by tweeting more, by telling your friends about us, by reviewing us. So do all that and we'll stay around for 2023, 2024 and forever, we hope. But we really need y'all to help spread the word. Word of mouth is the most powerful tool.
Also, a huge thank you to our producer Chantel Holder, engineer Brendan Burns and Marcus Holm for our theme music and sound design. Special thanks to our executive producers, Nora Ritchie at Stitcher and Brendan Sharp from Agenda Management and Production. And last but not least, thank you to Jared O'Connell and Emile Deskender for all of their help.
And of course, listeners, we want to thank you for being you. We could not do this show without you. And we always want to hear from you. You can reach out to us at any time via email at vibecheckatstitcher.com. Tell us how your holidays are going. Tell us your favorite pop culture from the year. Tell us what you're doing to keep your vibe right for the new year. Let us know. We love to hear from you. Vibecheckatstitcher.com. Also, find us on Instagram at Sam Sanders at Zach Staff.
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Use the hashtag VibeCheckPod if you post about the show. Also, find us on TikTok at VibeCheckPod. Till next time, have a wonderful holiday season and a happy new year. We'll be back next Wednesday with a new episode. In the meantime, how do we say goodbye in Spanish besides adios? Because we're all in Mexico right now as we hear this. Chao. Adios. Hasta luego. Hasta luego.
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