things must fall apart in order to fall into place + how the universe tests you
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Hello and welcome to the Claim Your Power podcast, the ultimate show for all things self-love, spirituality, and personal growth. I'm your host, Kim Peretz. I'm a three-time author, content creator, avid traveler, entrepreneur, and matcha enthusiast. You are at the right place if you're ready to rediscover the love within, align with your purpose, and unleash your highest potential. It's time to claim your power.

Hello my friends and welcome back to the pod. I hope you're having a beautiful day wherever you are, whatever time it may be for you. I cannot believe that we are already in 2024. Like where did the time go? And I don't know about you, but I am relieved and I am excited and I am open to receive because 2023 was a mission for me. It was a journey, okay? Like

2023 was one of the most pivotal years of my life for me emotionally. I felt like I had a lot of life lessons that had to do with my relationship with myself and others and my thoughts and my emotions. And I really felt that 2023 was a year of a lot of life lessons. And I think that that was a big theme for a lot of us. It was a year of...

the way I see it I felt like an onion in 2023 okay like I just kept peeling off the layers of

more and more and more and the reason I'm excited for 2024 is because I genuinely believe like even through the numerology of everything and I talked about it in the new year new you episode that 2024 is about a year of expansion it's a year of abundance 2024 adds up to the number eight eight is the number of prosperity and abundance and good energy it's about reaping the

getting all the energy that you put out there and all the light that you put out there coming back to you tenfold. Today I want to talk to you guys about a topic that I think is so important that I haven't touched base on a lot and I think it's really good that I'm talking about it now in January at the beginning of 2024 and obviously maybe you may be listening to this. Now I'm thinking like a future version of me but maybe it's not January right now as you're listening to me and more time has passed and

But I'm filming it in January 2024 with the intention of, okay, once you have these realizations and these mindset shifts about your life, 2024 can be a completely different year and a transformative experience for you.

And so today I want to talk to you about the concept of how things in your life sometimes must fall apart in order for them to fall into place. So something that I've noticed in my own life is that often before something really, really exciting happens in my life, like a positive shift happens,

a new opportunity, a new person coming into my life, a new manifestation coming to fruition. Before that happens in my life, what I have noticed is I would be experiencing utter chaos. I would be experiencing the opposite of what it is I want to be experiencing. And in those moments, I feel an energy of lack and lack of trust and lack of faith.

And so if you're in a phase in your life right now, let's say it's the beginning of 2024, you set all your intentions for the year. Maybe it is that you want to be healthier and more committed to your health. Maybe it is that you want to call in that relationship. Maybe it's you want to take that next step in your business, whatever it may be. If you're noticing right now that instead of those things happening for you, things are crumbling apart.

This is something that you have to realize. It is so pivotal and I've realized this through my own trial and error. And that is before something really, really amazing happens to you in your life, the universe tests you. Now when I say tests you, I don't mean like a pass or fail or you're getting punished for anything. It's more as it is an opportunity for growth.

before something shifts in your life because right when you want to get a new manifestation when you want to have a positive change in your life you're also changing your identity you're changing your energy you're changing your vibration and before that can take place the universe sends you an opportunity for you to show yourself and your higher self and the universe that you are in a different energy that you are ready to receive whatever it is that you want

And the thing is, is those moments usually are pain points. Those moments are usually triggers.

There's a quote, I'm totally going to butcher it, but it's like this idea of like, okay, if you ask God to make you strong, then it's not going to just give you strength right away. It's going to send you an opportunity to find your strength and find your courage from within. So it's this idea that before you receive something really, really amazing in your life, you might notice that things are completely falling apart.

And the trick here, and this is where a lot of people miss the point, is that they lose faith and they get discouraged in those moments. But in reality, when you have that moment and that trigger,

You are literally so close to the manifestation. You are closer than you can even believe and even fathom because if you weren't experiencing the complete opposite of what it is that you want in your life, you wouldn't actually have the realization of what it is you desire. And so I've reached a genuine place in my life where I know that when things are falling apart in my life, when things are chaotic,

I am like, bring it on, baby. Like show me what you got because you best know that I'm going to pass this test and I'm going to reap my rewards. I'm going to take the lesson. I'm going to extract the lesson. I'm going to learn the lesson and I'm going to overcome the obstacle. And that is the energy that I want to instill you guys with in 2024 is if you feel like your whole life is falling apart right now, I want you to literally look at this exact moment in your life and

And genuinely fill up yourself with a sense of gratitude because if your life wasn't about to change completely for the better, then things wouldn't be shaky. Things would just be stagnant and neutral and normal. And the fact is, is that when things like that happen to you, when you get triggered again by the same situation, by the same scenario, and you feel like you're getting the same lessons and the same patterns over and over again, you are being called to respond differently.

And so let me give you a really good example of something that like this is kind of personal to my life, but I want to share it because A, this podcast is all about vulnerability, but also B, that I feel that a lot of you guys will be able to relate to this.

So for me 2021 and 2022 were the most like pivotal years of my life thus far. Like those were the years like in 2022 where I was battling a lot of health issues. I was battling an eating disorder. I was in and out of the ER. I went through a breakup with my long-term ex-boyfriend. I didn't get into my dream university that I really wanted to go to. I lost a lot of certain friends I had in my life and

And I just felt very, very lost, very confused and just very all over the place. And that was a year also that completely spiritually awakened me. Like I was already on a spiritual path back in 2019. But in 2022, that was a year of like a lot of aha moments, a lot of deep self-love work,

a lot of looking in the mirror getting to know myself on a deeper level and also that was the year of a lot of blessings that was the year that you know I started the podcast that was the year that I started TikTok that was the year that I traveled to Costa Rica by myself and I got my yoga license so

That was the year of a lot of expansion and a lot of growth that kind of set the stage to who I am and how I got to where I am today as a human, as a soul. So for the past two years, I have been and I have embarked on like a very intense journey.

self-love journey. I've gotten to know myself in ways that I've never done before. I've realized my worth again. I've developed self-compassion. I've gotten to know who I am as a woman. I've connected to my feminine energy, like so many things. Like this past two years of my life was very pivotal to my self-love journey.

And something that I've always like something about me is I genuinely believe that like in this lifetime, love is like a big part of my journey. Of course, I'm very driven and I think career and all those things are super important in this lifetime for me. But even like in my astrology chart,

There's a lot of planets that showcase that for me in this lifetime and in this incarnation, relationships and being a mother and falling in love is like really pivotal parts of my life that will serve a lot of life lessons. And it's something that I genuinely desire, something that I want in my life.

One of my biggest dreams is to just get a farm, be a mom, raise my kids, have some chickens and horses. I'm being for real, guys. Putting it out into the existence, speaking it into existence, it will happen, and so it is, and so it is. Anyways, I'm going off track here. We'll come back to my farm girl life story in a couple years when it's reality, and I'll tell you all about it. But anyways, so for the past year, I want to say in 2023, I've been

It was a year of like really getting to know who I am versus relationships. Like it was a year of getting to know my attachment style. It was a year of getting to know what type of person I am when I'm in love, what type of person I want to be in a relationship. It was a year of casually dating, getting to know myself more, getting to feel back into my feminine energy to find my worth again.

And it was also definitely a year of like a lot of confusion, a lot of emotional turmoil when it came to love and relationships. It was a year of moments where I felt down and I felt low and moments where I had lost hope a bit in the universe's plan for me when it came to love. Because something about me is I don't settle.

in any area of my life, especially in relationships. I know myself enough and I value my peace enough to know that it is not enough for me to settle in a relationship because my self-love is stronger than my desire to be loved at this point in my life.

And so in my head and in my heart, I genuinely know the type of person that will be aligned for me. And now like I don't have everything in mind, obviously, but I know the energy and I know the feeling. And I also know that the universe has the best man in mind for me and in store for me and that I will meet this man at the right time and at the right place and for the right reasons. And as I'm saying this, it's 1111 on the clock. What the fuck?

Anyways, so where I'm going with this is I experience so much chaos when I'm not

When it came to my relationship with men in the past year, like I have experienced so many moments where I felt like low self-worth, where I felt like I wasn't enough, where I felt like I was chasing and pursuing and I was overlaying my masculine energy. And so that was happening a lot in like towards the end of 22, the beginning, like the first half year of 2023. Towards the end of 2023, I really felt like I found my self-worth.

I felt embodied. I felt aligned. I felt grounded and centered. And I felt really good about myself and I still do. And that was the energy that I've been in for the past like 10 months of my life.

And recently, in the past couple of weeks, I've been finding myself experiencing so many old triggers that I thought I had released and I thought I had let go months ago, even years ago. I thought I had already released them and worked on them and they were coming back out to play. Like they were coming out. Things that I didn't even realize were subconsciously buried in me were coming out to surface and

And, again, like, it's this whole idea that healing is not linear. It's more of, like, a cycle and a downward spiral. You take one step back and two steps forward, right? And so I really felt like in a moment, I even had a thought to myself, like, a month ago being, like, I am just going to give up. Like, I'm just going to give up on this idea of, like, finding a relationship or, like, being in a relationship in the next five years because maybe, like, this is just not my time. Maybe this is just...

not my place and I'm not in a position where I want to make myself small to anyone in my life. I'm not in a position that I want to settle for something mediocre. And so I kind of had a moment of like discouragement where I was genuinely having a conversation with the universe being like,

did you forget about me? Like, did you forget about me? Like, what about all the inner work I've done? What about all the self-love and all the times where I could have, you know, settled or chosen the low frequency decision and I didn't? Did you forget about me? And I was genuinely having that conversation with the universe. And then I had this aha moment where I genuinely felt like it was weird because I was in a meditative state, but I genuinely felt something. Like, I suddenly felt

Like I was, I'm so close to meeting the man of my dreams. Now, I have not met this man. So we are talking futuristic stuff. Like this is all very DeLulu. But in my meditation, I had genuinely felt his energy. Like I had felt like...

I just got out all these past limiting beliefs about love and then for a second I was able to get a glimpse of like, no Kim, you are experiencing all these triggers because these are like the last few tweaks you need to make within yourself and your own heart and your own inner work before you can open yourself up again to something amazing and something expansive and something that you truly desire.

And I had that realization of like, I am being tested right now by the universe. Am I going to lose faith?

Because this person hasn't come into my life in the physical. Am I going to lose faith and believe that the universe gave up on me? Or am I going to lean into this idea and belief that no, like the universe loves me and the universe hears me and sees me and deems me worthy. And whatever I've already put out into the universe will come to me at the right time. And then I had that realization of like,

I can just trust in that. I can choose the low frequency narrative or I can choose the high frequency narrative. And so then I went on a walk and I saw this guy that was selling flowers and I was like, you know what? I'm going to buy myself some flowers. So I bought myself a bouquet of flowers and I was walking back to my apartment and the doorman in my building looks at me and he's like,

oh my god, Kim, did you like just come back from a date? Like he gave me that face, like he wasn't saying it, but he gave me that face of like, oh, nice, like, who are these from? And he asked me like, oh, who did you get the flowers from? And I was like, no, like, I just bought them for myself. Like I'm about to go eat some Mediterranean food in my apartment and watch a good movie. And he like looked at me and he was like,

I was sure like this is from a date, like maybe he's on the way. Like he literally said that to me. And that was a day after, not even a day after I was having like that meditation where I had a lot of realizations about myself. And guys, maybe I'm being delusional right now, but I genuinely took that as like a sign of confirmation from the universe of Kimmy.

trust we got you we know what you desire and it's going to come to you at the right time and you can really lean into that feminine energy of like trusting and receiving and so I just took that as such like a beautiful confirmation from the universe of like when you do the inner work on yourself and you realize that sometimes things go crazy or fall apart get chaotic in your life because it's the universe asking you to dive deeper and get to know yourself on a deeper level and

You'll also start receiving beautiful confirmations from the universe. Now, again, I have not met this man. There is literally no man on the horizon for me right now. My phone is dry, okay? But genuinely in my heart, I feel that at the right time, I will meet this man. Now, maybe it's in a week. Maybe it's in a year. I don't know. But I'm also not attached to the outcome. But I've come to this conclusion of like, I genuinely trust you.

And I genuinely feel this frequency of love within me and I radiate it out. And so I know I will magnetize the right people into my life. And so the reason I told you guys this story is because I feel like a lot of you guys can relate. Like maybe a lot of you guys are in the waiting period or in the limbo period and you feel like maybe this has to do with a relationship or anything else you want in your life, a new opportunity, a new job, new friendships, whatever it may be. If you're in that waiting state,

genuinely I believe with my whole heart that sometimes when the universe is making you wait

It's because it is preparing you to receive much more than you asked for. Much, much, much more. So right before you can move into a higher vibration, right before you can receive the things that you are calling into your life, you'll have this like tower moment. And in that tower moment, life will remove everything and everyone who's no longer a match to where you are going.

people and things in your life that are no longer in alignment for you, they will either rise with you or they will fall off. And if you feel like a lot is crumbling right now in your life, it's because you are making space for more light, for more joy, for more peace, for more abundance to enter your life and you don't even know it. Like think about it. You can't receive something. Let's say, for instance, you're at your apartment and your trash is like

Overflowing. Overflowing. Okay? And you just like refuse to take out the trash. What's going to happen? It's going to start getting moldy. It's going to start stinking up your apartment. Maybe some rats are going to start visiting up your trash can. And it's just going to be like this nasty trash bag that's attracting all these moths everywhere.

and all this negative energy and you're keeping that into your apartment. So maybe you kept it in that little trash can, but it went all over and it reaped across your whole apartment. And if you decided to take that trash can out and dump the trash, you know what will happen? Your apartment will be clean. It will be sparkling. It will glow. It will smell nice. And that, I want you to take that energy and apply it into your life.

If you do not take out the trash, if things do not shift and crumble apart in your life, how can you welcome in new energy? So when things fall apart in your life, I want you to consider the possibility that maybe the universe is knocking it down on purpose. And this is not to bully you or to punish you.

But it is to prompt you to build something better for yourself. It is to prompt you to realize something about yourself, to learn a lesson and to rise up stronger from it. So the way I look at it is that life is a teacher. And so after it teaches you something, it will test you to see if you've actually learned it. And so before you can level up, before you can elevate or upgrade to the next level of your life,

you will be confronted with a previous pattern or previous karma or a previous trigger that will inspire you to make the conscious choice to respond differently so that you can be open to receiving the lesson.

And so the universe, the way I look at it, it's like it's not testing you in a mean way. It's simply giving you an opportunity to practice what it is that you want to be, who it is that you want to become. It's giving you that opportunity. And so I truly believe that meditation,

magic and miracles and blessings happen when you do not give up and when you do not lose courage even when you want to because remember guys if you are being tested right now by life you are so close to a shift you are so close to a positive change and so instead of letting that break you down let it be your stepping stone and something that really brings me a lot of inner peace is

is that the universe will never send you an experience or a lesson that you can't handle. Like every single thing that you experience in life is aligned with your soul's journey and what it is that you're meant to grow and experience. So I want to share with you guys some signs that you can look out for in your own life to see maybe life is just sending you a test and an opportunity for growth.

So number one is if you keep finding yourself in triggering situations that bring up a lot of discomfort for you, you're being tested. Or if you find yourself questioning a lot like your path or are you on the right journey or you're questioning your trust, that could be a sign that you're being tested.

And another thing is if you're experiencing the complete opposite of what it is that you want to call in or another thing that I've noticed is you're being shown other people experiencing the manifestations that you want, whether it be a friend getting that promotion that you really wanted or getting to go on that trip or meeting the love of their life and you're getting to witness all of that, of them going through that.

but it kind of triggers a sense of lack in it for you of like, when will it be my turn? You're being tested, my friend. And so instead of letting these tests bring you down and pull you back,

run with it remember that these tests you're so close like i i bet you like the universe is looking up at you right now as you're getting discouraged over these tests and they're like oh my god this bitch so close to what she wants and she's so close to that manifestation and if she only got out of her head for like one second and trusted us and just trusted her path then she would see and

And so I'm giving you, I'm relaying you this message, my friend. So let me end this episode by telling you this one thing. And that is the universe will send you a distraction right before sending you exactly what you asked for, something even better than what you asked for to see if you're going to settle, to see if you're going to let that break you down, to see if you're going to let that hurt your spirit or hurt your belief in yourself.

Or if you're going to pass on stronger, if you're going to rise up from it and remember that even if things aren't making sense exactly right now, you're trusting. Beautiful souls, thank you so much for joining me in today's episode. As always, I will talk to you next week. Bye!