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Georgiana
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Nate
通过分享财务挑战和关系经验,Nate 和他的伴侣 Serena 为其他夫妻提供了宝贵的财务管理和关系维护见解。
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Sarah
个人财务专家,广播主持人和畅销书作者,通过“Baby Steps”计划帮助数百万人管理财务和摆脱债务。
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Georgiana: 作为一名英语学习者,我发现很多同学都有一个习惯,那就是过度使用“sorry”。例如,在提问前说“Sorry, can I ask a question?”,或者在表达自己英语水平时说“Sorry, my English is bad.”。这种习惯很常见,但过度道歉会让你显得紧张和缺乏自信,甚至会影响别人对你的看法。礼貌固然重要,但并不意味着你需要为每一次表达道歉。我建议大家尝试用更自信的表达方式,例如用“Thank you for your patience”代替“Sorry for my English”,用“Do you have a moment?”代替“Sorry to bother you”。同时,也要避免在说话前自我否定,例如不要说“This is probably a dumb question”,而是直接表达你的想法。 Sarah: 我观察到Nate总是不断地道歉,即使他并没有做错什么。我很好奇地问他为什么总是道歉,他说他只是不想听起来很傻。但我告诉他,道歉会让他说的话听起来像是他自己都不相信。我希望他能意识到,没有必要总是为自己说的话道歉。 Nate: 我意识到自己有个不好的习惯,就是总是不断地道歉。即使是在和朋友们聊天时,我也会不自觉地说“Sorry, this is probably stupid”或者“Sorry, my English is bad”。Sarah的话让我开始反思,我意识到我一直在用道歉来保护自己,但这实际上让我显得更加渺小。于是,我决定改变,尝试在表达观点时不道歉,结果我发现朋友们更认真地倾听了。我感觉自己终于能够自信地表达,而不再需要隐藏自己。

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中文

Hi, I'm Georgiana, and I'm back with a new episode of the Speak English Now podcast, the podcast that helps you speak English fluently with no grammar and no textbooks. If you want to help me, share the podcast with your friends and family. That would mean a lot. Thanks!

On my website, you can find the 5 secrets to speaking English and my premium courses. Before we start, get the transcript. Visit speakenglishpodcast.com slash podcast. Okay, let's start. Today's episode is about something many English learners do too often.

Saying sorry all the time, even when they don't need to. Let me give you some examples. Sorry. Can I ask a question? Sorry. My English is bad. Sorry for bothering you. Sorry for my pronunciation. Maybe you've said these before. Maybe you say them often.

That's okay. It's a common habit, especially for people who want to be polite. But here's the truth. Saying sorry too much makes you sound nervous, even when you're doing nothing wrong. It makes your voice sound small. It makes you feel weak inside. And it teaches other people not to take you seriously.

Why do people say sorry too much? There are a few reasons. You're learning English, so you feel insecure. You don't want to seem rude. You're afraid of making mistakes. Or you want to be extra polite. But being polite does not mean apologizing for speaking.

And it definitely doesn't mean apologizing for your English. When should you say sorry? Yes, it's okay to say sorry when you interrupt someone or you're late or you do something that causes a problem for others. But don't apologize just for speaking. Don't say sorry before every question.

And don't say sorry because you're not perfect. You don't need permission to talk. You're learning. You're trying. And that's something to feel proud of, not ashamed. Say this instead. Let's look at some better ways to express yourself with confidence and respect. Instead of Sorry for my English. Say Sorry.

Thanks for your patience. I'm still learning. Instead of, Sorry to bother you. Say, Do you have a moment? Or, I appreciate your time. Instead of, Sorry for the question. Say, Can I ask something quickly? These are respectful, but they don't make you sound small or afraid. They say,

I value your time, but I also value myself. And don't undervalue what you say. Here's another important thing. Stop putting yourself down before you even speak. Many learners start their sentences like this. This is probably a dumb question. Or, I don't know if this is right, but... Or...

My English is bad, but I'll try. Please don't do this. When you speak like this, people stop listening. And if your idea is great, your words sound weak. And your brain starts to believe that what you say is not important. So instead of saying, this might be a stupid question, try this. Can I build on that idea?

Here's what I'm thinking. Or, I'd like to share a thought. These phrases are strong. They're polite. And they show confidence even if your English isn't perfect. The message is simple. You don't need to say sorry for learning English. You don't need to apologize for asking something.

and you don't need to speak like a native speaker to deserve respect. You just need to breathe, stay calm, and speak with honesty and confidence. Let's continue with a point-of-view story. I will tell you the same story, but in different points of view. This will help you practice grammar in a natural way.

You can find more about this method in my premium courses. Visit speakenglishpodcast.com slash courses to get my premium courses. They are designed for learning by listening. Let's listen to the story in the past tense. Nate was a kind man who loved meeting his friends at a small cafe near his apartment.

Every Saturday, they gathered to talk about life, sports, music, anything. But Nate had a habit. Before he said anything, he always apologized. He would say things like, Sorry, maybe this sounds dumb. Sorry, I talk too much. Sorry, my English isn't great. Even when he had something interesting to say,

He made it sound weak. His voice got quiet. He looked down. His friends smiled and listened. But they didn't really pay attention. One day, someone new joined the group. Sarah, a friend of a friend. After Nate said sorry for the third time, she asked kindly, Why do you keep apologizing? You haven't done anything wrong.

Nate laughed nervously and shrugged. I don't know. I guess I just don't want to sound silly. Sarah replied, You don't sound silly. But when you say sorry first, it's like you don't believe what you're saying. That night, Nate thought a lot about her words. She was right. He had made sorry a habit, a shield.

But it wasn't protecting him. It was making him small. So he decided to stop. The next Saturday, when his friends met again, Nate said, I've been thinking about that movie you mentioned. Can I share my opinion? No apology, no excuse. Just calm, clear words. Everyone listened.

He didn't speak loudly or perfectly. But for the first time, Nate felt that his voice mattered. He didn't feel afraid. He felt present. He felt like himself, without sorry at the beginning. Let's listen to the story one more time in the first person present. Hi, I'm Nate.

I meet my friends at a cafe almost every weekend. We sit outside, order coffee, and talk about everything. News, movies, funny stories. I enjoy these moments, but I have a habit I can't ignore. I keep saying sorry. I say, sorry, this is probably stupid.

Sorry, my English is bad. Sorry, I talk too much. I don't even think about it. The words just come out. And when they do, I feel smaller. My friends smile. They're kind. But I know they don't really listen. They hear my words, but not my voice. Then, one weekend, a new person joins us.

Her name is Sarah. After I say sorry for something small, she looks at me and asks, Why do you keep apologizing? You don't need to. I feel surprised. I laugh. I try to change the topic. But later that night, I remember her question. She's right. I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm just afraid.

Afraid of sounding wrong. Afraid of not being perfect. Afraid of being seen. So the next time we meet, I try something different. I don't say sorry. I say, Hey, I've been thinking about what you said last time. Can I add something? That's all. No apology. No fear. Just me speaking.

And the result? They listen. Really listen. I don't speak louder or smarter. I just stop hiding. And for the first time, I believe my words matter. Great work! You've just practiced the same story in two tenses, past and first person present, to help you learn grammar and confidence naturally.

Remember, you don't need to say sorry just to be polite. You don't need to start every sentence with doubt. Speak clearly. Speak calmly. You are enough. And if you want to practice more, get my premium courses at speakenglishpodcast.com slash courses. I'll see you next week. Bye-bye.

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