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cover of episode Keep the old

Keep the old

2025/5/22
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Before Breakfast

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Laura: 我认为,维系旧的友谊至关重要,因为你无法创造一段旧的友谊。你可以结交新的朋友,他们可能会成为老朋友,但你不能凭空创造一个老朋友。所以,找到维系你珍视的长期友谊的方法,你可能会更快乐。正如童谣所说,结交新朋友是明智的,但不要忘记老朋友。随着我们人生的展开,结交与我们有共同经历和优先事项的新朋友固然好,但老友之间的关系时好时坏也很正常。即使如此,明智的做法是有意识地维护我们珍视的旧友谊,因为你无法创造一段旧的友谊,而且在未来的某个时刻,你可能会想要再次亲近。所以,想想过去与你关系密切的人,想想如何重温这些关系。如果你有时会和朋友发短信,建议一起喝咖啡或午餐。或者你可以做一些能重燃旧时共同兴趣的事情。如果你过去一起踢足球,也许你可以一起在体育酒吧观看一场重要的足球比赛。我知道维系旧友谊的最大障碍之一是,我们中的许多人并不住在老朋友附近。人们为了上学、工作、家庭而搬家。因为我们没有在日常生活中见到彼此,所以我们无法像以前那样容易地维持联系。但现在的科技非常有用。你可以建议与老朋友进行Zoom聚会,我相信你会发现自己很容易聊天。或者,这是一个重要的认识,你可以旅行。即使一年只见面一次,也能很好地维持一段关系。如果你有时间和可支配收入,你可以开车或乘飞机去拜访他们。如果你真的已经很久没有见面了,并且想循序渐进地进行,你可以找到曾经关系密切的人,并想出一个合理的理由让你出现在那个地区。我们中的许多人可以为了工作做很多事情,或者我们可以去看音乐会或表演,或者拜访远房亲戚,并在途中顺便拜访一位老朋友。然后,一旦你这样做了,就更容易维持联系。你发送短信和照片,让他们了解你的生活。人生很长。与那些与我们分享过去记忆和经历的朋友一起走过这段旅程感觉很好。所以,如果最近你一直在想一位老朋友,不妨考虑联系一下。重燃友谊可以让你与老朋友和过去的自己重新建立联系。

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This is an iHeart Podcast.

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Offer ends March 31st. See if your company qualifies for this special offer at oracle.com slash strategic. That's oracle.com slash strategic. Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's tip is to invest in your old friendships. You cannot make an old friend. You can make a new one who might become an old one.

but you can't just make an old one. So figure out ways to sustain the longtime friendships you value, and you will probably be happier overall. So as the childhood song advises, we are wise to make new friends, but keep the old. As our lives unfold, it's great to make new friends who share our current experiences and priorities. And it is natural that older friendships ebb and flow.

We go through more or less close times as people have other stuff in their lives or enter phases of life at different times. But even so, it is wise to thoughtfully maintain the old friendships we value because you can't make an old friend. And it is quite possible that a time will come in life when you will want to be close again. So think about people you have been close with in the past

And think about how you might warm up these relationships. If you sometimes text with a friend, suggest getting together for coffee or lunch. Or you might do something else that revives an old shared interest. If you used to play soccer together, maybe you could watch a major soccer match together at a sports bar. Of course, I know one of the biggest barriers to maintaining old friendships is that many of us don't live near our old friends.

People move for school, for work, for family. And because we don't see each other in our day-to-day lives, we can't maintain the connections as easily. But technology is so helpful these days. You might suggest a Zoom meetup with an old friend, and I am sure you will find yourself chatting pretty easily. Or, and this is an important realization, you can travel. Even just seeing someone once a year can maintain a relationship pretty well.

If you've got some flexibility with your time and some disposable income, as I know is true for a lot of people who listen to this podcast, you can get in your car or get on a plane and go. If it has truly been a while and you want to ease into things, you can identify people you were once close to and come up with a plausible reason you would be in the area.

Lots of us can do many things for work, or we could go to concerts or shows or visit extended family members and stop by and see an old friend on the way. Then, once you have done that, it will be a lot easier to maintain the connection. You send texts and photos and keep them posted on your life. Life is long. It feels good to have friends on the journey who share past memories and experiences with us.

So if there is an old friend who has been on your mind lately, consider reaching out. Renewing your friendship could give you a sense of connection to the old friend and to your past self, too. I'd love to hear about your experiences maintaining or rekindling old friendships. You can reach me at laura at lauravandercam.com. In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening. And here's to making the most of our time.

Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me at laura at lauravandercam.com. Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts from iHeartMedia, please visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.

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