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cover of episode Extrovert, Introvert, Neurotic Or Agreeable; Can You Change Your Personality? Uncut with Olga Khazan

Extrovert, Introvert, Neurotic Or Agreeable; Can You Change Your Personality? Uncut with Olga Khazan

2025/3/13
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Life Uncut

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Olga Khazan: 我通过一年的实验探索了性格改变的可能性。我发现,虽然部分性格由基因决定,但环境和个人努力也能显著改变性格。我最初神经质程度很高,经常被小事困扰。为了改变,我尝试了冥想、即兴表演、参加社交活动等方法,并向擅长交际的朋友学习技巧。这些努力使我的神经质程度有所下降,宜人程度略有提高,并且我开始更积极地期待与他人的互动。 我发现,性格改变并非一蹴而就,需要持之以恒的努力和行动。改变性格的关键在于找到适合自己的方法,并坚持下去。此外,性格改变的目标应该是为了提升自身幸福感,而不是为了取悦他人。 在改变性格的过程中,我也意识到,适度的焦虑和神经质是正常的,甚至是有益的。关键在于平衡,避免过度焦虑或神经质,影响正常生活。 Laura: 我们经常讨论改变伴侣性格,却很少反思能否改变自身性格。人们希望通过改变性格变得更受欢迎、更合群、更易于约会,或在工作中表现更好。 Keisha: 维持友谊可以通过分享有趣的网络内容等低成本高效率的方式。在人生的不同阶段,例如开始新工作、恋爱、生孩子等,性格也会自然发生变化。但是,改变他人的性格非常困难,除非双方有共同的目标。

Deep Dive

Chapters
The podcast explores the possibility of personality change, examining the genetic and environmental influences on personality traits. It discusses how life changes can significantly impact personality and whether actively seeking change is possible and beneficial.
  • 50% of personality is genetic, the rest is environmental.
  • Life changes like a new job or relationship can drastically shift personality.
  • Personality change is not about becoming more likable, but rather improving life satisfaction.

Shownotes Transcript

Have you ever wondered “If I wanted to change my personality, would I be able to?” Or have you ever wondered if it was possible for someone else to truly change their personality? This was a question that today’s guest wondered about herself and so she went on a journey to find out whether it was** *****really ***possible to change your entire personality!

Joining the podcast today is Olga Khazan.** **Olga is a writer for The Atlantic, and the author of the new book *Me, But Better: The Science and Promise of Personality Change. *Olga spent a year experimenting with her own personality to see if she could become more extroverted, a lot less neurotic, and a little more agreeable. 

We speak about:

  • Exactly why you might like to change your personality
  • How much of our personality is ‘hard wired’
  • The ‘big 5’ personality traits: extroversion, neuroticism, agreeableness, conscientiousness, openness.
  • How different aspects of our personality affects our relationships
  • Making friends when you’re not particularly extroverted
  • Can you change someone else’s personality?
  • Do certain life stages encourage a personality change?
  • What things can you do to change your personality?

You can get Olga's new book Me, But Better)

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