Don McPond and the Case of the Red Rascal
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Hello! Welcome to Stories Podcast. I'm your host, Amanda Weldon. Today's story is called Don McPond and the Case of the Red Rascal. An original story written for you by Daniel Hines.

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Thanks! Enjoy the episode! Don McPond and the Case of the Red Rascal Once upon a time, in a busy bit of neighborhood woods, there lived a turtle named Don McPond. He looked like any other turtle—roundish, greenish, and slowish. But appearances can be deceiving.

Sure, he couldn't move any faster than any other turtle, but his brain? That went a mile a minute.

His brain collected facts like a crow collected shiny things. He could hear a fact once, and three months later you could say, Hey Don, what animal lives the longest? And without breaking his very slow stride, he'd reply, The glass sponge can live 10,000 years, but more commonly the Greenland shark can live to 500. Which is, of course, the correct answer.

This amazing ability, coupled with Don McPawn's natural love of fairness, made him the best private detective in the entire town. Animals would come from all over with their mysteries, and no matter how tricky the case, Don puzzled it out like a parrot with a new word.

To make himself easy to find, he had set up his detective agency in the middle of the woody patch between some houses and the town forest. There was a hollow tree stump he made his office, and outside hung his sign, written in Don's own slow and careful handwriting. It read,

Don McPond, Turtle Detective. All animals welcome. 25 grapes per case. No biting. The cost was grapes because that was Don McPond's favorite food. It was 25 grapes because that's how many he could eat in a day. The no biting rule was added last, after he had caught a wolf in a lie and gotten a chomp for his trouble. Of course, his shell kept him safe,

But all the same, it seemed prudent to add. Prudent is a word that means wise and careful, which described Don McPond just about perfectly.

This particular day, he was sitting outside of his office, basking in the new summer sun. His scaly self was laid out on a broad, flat rock he kept handy for just such occasions. Don would have been happy to spend the whole day like that, kicked back in complete reptile relaxation. But suddenly, someone was pulling on his little toe where it dangled off the rock.

Hey, what's the big idea? Don said in a friendly sort of way. Can a turtle get a little sunshine on his cold blood? Oh, sorry, Mr. McPond, said a squeaky little voice. Don squinted open his eyes and saw no one at all. Who said that? He asked, sitting up and looking around. Down here.

came the voice. Don leaned over the edge of the rock and saw a tiny little chipmunk fidgeting in the grass.

Um, you're the turtle detective, right? Don realized he had a customer and shook himself out of nap mode and into serious detective mode. He rolled off the stone and made his slow, waddling way back to his stump. He stood behind the counter, put on his detective hat, and then leaned over with a smile.

Sorry for the delay, he said. You've reached Don McPond, turtle detective. All cases welcome. What might your name be and how can I help you today? Thank the trees, I found you, the chipmunk said. I was looking all over, but when you're small, every turtle is a giant, and some of them snap, so I had to be extra careful.

She dusted herself off and stood to her full height, which was about five inches, not including the tail, of course. My name is Tripsy, she said, extending a tiny little paw. Pleasure to meet you, Detective McPond, sir. Dawn carefully took the tiny squirrel paw in his own scaly mitt. Pleasure's all mine, and you can call me Dawn. Now, what seems to be the problem?

said Tripsy, shaking her little head. I had stashed away an orange that a human had dropped in the fall. I've been saving it frozen all winter for a spring celebration, and it's gone. Stolen fruit, Don said, shaking his head and thinking about his own precious stash of grapes. Is there no decency left in the forest? That's what I said, agreed Tripsy.

Where did you have it stashed? I kept it wrapped up in my tree to stay juicy, she said. It wasn't locked away or anything, just tucked under my table. I should have hid it. Hey, it's not your fault you got robbed, said Dawn. We can figure this out. Let's start with, when did it go missing?

Just this morning, Tripsy said. I left my tree around ten or so, just for an hour to visit my sister. And when I got home, it was gone. Dastardly, said Don McPond. Now, the suspects. Did anyone know about the orange? Think so, said Tripsy, wiggling her busy tail.

Wait, that's not true. A couple of animals saw me carrying it in. Wally the squirrel and Betty Bunny were hanging out by my tree. But Dawn, they're my neighbors. They couldn't have done it. A big piece of fruit can make even a good neighbor go bad, Dawn said sadly. We better go talk to the suspects.

All right, said Tripsy. And I didn't forget your grapes. I just couldn't carry them all at once. The little chipmunk pulled a single little purple grape from her chubby cheeks. Here's one. I have 24 more at home.

Say no more, said Don McPond. I'm on the case. Don flipped over his sign to let other animals know that he was out of office. The back of the sign read, Closed or working on a case or in the bathroom. Come back tomorrow or tonight or in five minutes.

All right, said Don. Lead the way. Tripsy nodded and then started off into the trees. They're usually hanging out together by the lake where it's sandy this time of day. I bet we can find them both there. The pair made their way to the lake and arrived in the mid-afternoon, the sun warm and clear in the cloudless sky. On the sandy shore, the sun was warm enough to bask in,

and dawn stretched into light. Feels good on the old cold blood. I bet, said Tripsy, panting. But it's too hot when you've got all this fur. They smiled at each other and started to walk the sand.

Soon, Tripsy asked if she could ride on Dawn's shell because the sand was hot on her paws. Dawn, of course, said of course and stayed on course. Soon, they saw a bright blue blanket stretched out in the sand. Betty Bunny was sprawled back reading a book and Wally the squirrel was watching the water and eating a chocolate bar off the blanket.

Don, called Betty, and Tripsy. What are you two doing out this way? It's awfully warm, but it's a wonderful day for the beach. You're welcome to share our blanket. Yeah, said Wally. Pop on over, dudes. Don and Tripsy walked over to the blanket and sat down, but the others noticed the serious look on Don's face. Uh-oh, said Wally.

This isn't a social call, is it? I'm afraid not, said Don. I'm here looking for some stolen goods. Wally and Betty gasped. Surely not, said Betty. What do you mean? asked Wally. Sorry to say, said Don, but someone stole Tripsy's orange. Now, you know, they don't grow around here and they're tough to scavenge.

Who would steal an orange? asked Wally. Well, that's what I'm trying to figure out, Don asked. Now, I'm not accusing either of you, but you were the only two who knew about the orange. Is it possible you told someone else about it? Oh, I would never, said Betty, her long ears twitching. I would never steal and I would never tell.

And where were you this morning around 10 o'clock? Don asked. I was at home cleaning my house and packing up for a day at the beach, said Betty. And did anyone see you? Asked Don. No, said Betty. I packed up and I didn't see anyone until I got here to the beach an hour or so ago. But I swear I wouldn't steal.

That's okay, said Don. This is just detective work. No one is in trouble, he turned to Wally. Same questions, buddy. Where you been? Anyone else that might know about the orange? Wally put his little hand on his fuzzy chin and thought.

"'Huh, I've been here all morning. I found this bar of chocolate,' he held up a big solid square, "'and I've been sitting here munching it since ten or so. But, uh, come to think of it, I guess I mentioned the orange to a few people around the trees?'

"'Uh, sorry, it wasn't anything on purpose, just more like, "'Wow, Tripsy found a big orange! What luck!' He looked down, rubbing his clean hands together. "'Sorry if I got it stolen, Tripsy.' "'That's okay, Wally,' Tripsy said. "'It wasn't your fault.' "'Thanks, Trips,' said Wally. "'You want a piece of chocolate?' he asked and snapped off a square."

Sure, thanks, she said, gobbling down the chocolate and sitting down on the nice clean blanket. Sorry, Don, she said. I guess you can't solve every case. You're right, said Don. You can't solve every case, but I have solved this one. Don had cracked the case. Take a minute and see if you can figure it out too.

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On June 20th. Welcome to the community. Prepare to be conquered. But I just got here. Follow me. What is this place? These are the lava tunnels. I am not a... Disney and Pixar's Elio. In theaters June 20th. Tickets available now. Rated PG. Parental guidance suggested. Thanks. And now back to the story. The Story of Elio

What is the weather like at the beach? Is it warm or cold outside?

Betty the bunny said she was cleaning and packing. Wally said he was eating chocolate on the beach. Do those alibis make sense? What happens when you eat chocolate in the sun? Can you snap it off and keep it clean?

Tripsy turned to Dawn. Well, what did you figure out?

Sorry to say, but Wally here is the thief, or at least a liar. What? screeched Wally. What did that little red rascal say? He said, pointing an angry finger at Tripsy. I've been here with my chocolate all day.

"'And that was your mistake,' said Don. "'It's hot, hot, hot today. If you'd been outside on the sunny beach since ten this morning, your chocolate would be melty. It would be all over your hands, all over the blanket, and it certainly wouldn't snap into clean pieces. You are lying.' "'Oh, I... I'm sorry,' wailed Wally. "'You're right.'

When I saw you leave this morning, I went in and I stole your orange and hid it in my tree. Then I rushed over here and set up just before Betty got here so she'd think I'd been here all day. Wally, how could you? said Tripsy. Orange is my favorite, said Wally. I knew it was wrong, but I just couldn't help it.

Wally started to cry, and the others looked at him with a mixture of anger and pity. It happens, said Don. Did you eat the orange? No, no, said Wally. It's in my tree. You can have it back.

Together, they walked to Wally's, where he got the orange and brought it out, carrying it like a boulder in his little paws. He gave it back to Tripsy. I'm so sorry, Tripsy, he said.

I got so caught up in wanting the orange that I didn't think about how you'd feel. Of course you'd be upset. You found this and saved it all winter long. I never should have taken it. I'm so ashamed of myself and how I made you feel.

It's okay, Wally, said Tripsy, giving him a hug. You've been a friend and neighbor for years, and you've always been good to me. We all make mistakes. I just hope you won't make this mistake again. Never, said Wally. I felt so guilty all day. Thank you for forgiving me, Tripsy. That's really big of you. It's all right. My orange is back and all is right with the world, she said.

Oh, wait. Don, you solved the case. I still owe you 24 grapes. Let me get those for you. Wait, wait, said Wally. I have a big stash of grapes, definitely enough to pay Don and then more to share. Please, Tripsy, since it was my fault, let me pay Don his grapes and give you some too. I want to make things right. Don? asked Tripsy.

Grapes are grapes. I think that's mighty big of you, Wally. You're a good squirrel. Wally went to get the grapes, and he had so many they decided to bring them to the lake and finish the picnic in the sand. Of course, the chocolate was melty by then, but they had a great old time, dipping the grapes into chocolate and getting messy as they went.

Another great day, another happy customer, and another case solved by Don McPond, Turtle Detective. The End Today's story, Don McPond and the Case of the Red Rascal, was an original story written for you by Daniel Hines. It was edited and produced for you by Andrew Martin and performed for you by me, Amanda Weldon.

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