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cover of episode Hank Azaria’s Advice for Overcoming Codependency

Hank Azaria’s Advice for Overcoming Codependency

2025/1/15
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Modern Love
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Hank Azaria: 我年轻时经常使用幽默和扮演角色的方式来逃避真实的自我，这导致我在人际关系中出现问题，经历了多次失败的恋情。在意识到问题后，我开始寻求帮助，并通过参加Al-Anon项目以及个人治疗来解决我的依赖问题。在这个过程中，我学习了如何独处，了解自己的喜好，并最终找到了真实的自我。我开始信任自己，并寻找与自己真正契合的人。现在，我已经能够与他人建立真诚的连接，这对我来说是一种非常宝贵的体验。在与我妻子的关系中，我们都保持着各自的精神成长，并通过坦诚沟通和互相支持来维持健康的关系。 Hank Azaria: 这篇文章讲述了作者通过扮演角色来掩饰真实的自我，最终通过接纳真实的自我找到了爱情，这与我克服依赖症的经历产生了共鸣。我过去用幽默和表演来掩饰真实的自我，这与我作为配音演员和角色演员的职业有关，因为我潜意识里想成为任何其他人，而不是我自己。在20多岁时开始接受心理治疗，我的治疗师帮助我认识到自己的不成熟，并鼓励我信任真实的自己。我需要学习独处，了解自己的喜好，并以这种方式去约会自己。我将我的依赖性行为比作“契约”和“凌乱的房间”，前者是忽视自身问题而迎合他人，后者是需要处理的自身问题。我需要学习表达自己的需求，为自己的选择负责，并在生活中为自身发声。在克服依赖后，我开始关注自己真正想要的东西，然后寻找与自己契合的人。想要整合自我的不同部分，需要一个精神上的项目，这需要诚实地面对自己，并与信任的人分享，承担责任，保持透明，并努力解决问题。真正的连接来自于真诚，包括分享自己的羞愧和感受。在与我妻子的关系中，我们都保持着各自的精神成长，并通过坦诚沟通和互相支持来维持健康的关系。

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Chapters
The episode starts by introducing Hank Azaria, a renowned actor, and his various roles in Hollywood, particularly his voice acting in "The Simpsons." The conversation transitions to Azaria's use of humor and characters as a coping mechanism, touching upon his past relationships.
  • Hank Azaria's extensive acting career, including his roles in "The Simpsons"
  • Azaria's use of humor and characters as a coping mechanism
  • The connection between his comedic persona and his personal relationships

Shownotes Transcript

Hank Azaria is used to putting on other personalities. You probably know him best from his work as a voice actor on “The Simpsons,” where he plays Moe the bartender, Professor Frink, Chief Wiggum and Snake Jailbird, among many others. His list of credits in stage plays, movies and TV shows is prolific, including roles like his Tony-nominated performance in “Spamalot,” Phoebe’s boyfriend on “Friends” and the dog walker on “Mad About You.” But at a certain point in his life, Azaria realized that he was using humor and acting to be anyone but himself, and that it was affecting his real-life relationships. After five devastating heartbreaks, he resolved to look inward, address his codependency issues and become his most authentic self.

In this episode, Azaria tells us how he found authenticity and reads the Modern Love essay “In Defense of My Emu Tattoo),” about an author who masks his true self by using humor but eventually finds love by learning to be himself.

How to submit a Modern Love Essay to The New York Times)

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