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cover of episode How to Get Talking Again, With Lucy Dacus of boygenius

How to Get Talking Again, With Lucy Dacus of boygenius

2025/3/12
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Modern Love

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Lucy Dacus: 我在新的专辑《Forever Is A Feeling》中探索了对长期爱情的承诺,以及在爱情中坦诚沟通的重要性。在歌曲《Best Guess》中,我表达了即使知道未来充满不确定性,依然选择去爱,并接受爱情中变化的现实。这首歌也是我第一次在歌曲中明确使用女性代词来表达爱情,这对我来说是一个重要的突破。在歌曲《Talk》中,我表达了在一段关系中,沟通的缺失可能意味着关系的终结,以及在关系中感到被忽视和不被看见的恐惧。我认为在长期关系中,避免沦为像同事一样相处很重要,要避免沟通的断裂。我认为‘临界空间’,例如旅行中,有利于创造和思考,促进沟通。我希望别人了解我热情奔放的沟通方式,以及我不擅长发短信,但这不代表我不在乎他们。我认为‘期望’是导致不满的根源,在一段关系中,双方都需要投入努力并且意识到问题的存在,才能维系长久的关系。我建议在关系中留出‘眼神交流时间’来促进沟通。我对长期关系既兴奋又害怕,但我知道,人与人之间的关系会随着时间的推移而变得更加丰富。 Molly Pascal: 我和丈夫在婚姻中经历了沟通的断裂,我们曾经像‘吃饭的死人’一样沉默寡言,只谈论孩子和日常琐事。我们意识到需要改变,于是我们开始有意识地创造机会来沟通,例如去远足。在远离日常生活的环境中,我们重新找回了彼此的连接,并重新坠入爱河。

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On her fourth solo album, “Forever Is a Feeling” (out March 28), Lucy Dacus contemplates the fears and delights that go along with falling hard for someone. The song “Best Guess” celebrates the leap of faith involved in committing to a partner with the knowledge that both of you will change over time. And in another track called “Talk,” a couple realizes they’ve grown apart because they have nothing more to say to each other.

In this episode, Dacus reads Molly Pascal’s Modern Love essay “How the ‘Dining Dead’ Got Talking Again),” about a couple who sets out to bring conversation back into their marriage. And Dacus tells Anna Martin why she’s not afraid to put in the work for long-term love.

Lucy Dacus’ fourth solo album, “Forever Is a Feeling,” is out March 28.

Molly Pascal’s essay can be found here).

Here’s how to submit a Modern Love essay to The New York Times).

Here’s how to submit a Tiny Love Story).

Unlock full access to New York Times podcasts and explore everything from politics to pop culture. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts) or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.