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cover of episode Why Gossiping Could Help Your Love Life

Why Gossiping Could Help Your Love Life

2025/2/19
logo of podcast Modern Love

Modern Love

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A
Anna Martin
K
Kelsey McKinney
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Anna Martin: 我认为八卦有时可以是积极的,它可以帮助人们建立联系和维系友谊,好的八卦会让人们想要深入了解。 一个关于我高中同学的八卦故事,我和我的朋友们经常重提,它很有趣,也说明了八卦的魅力。 Kelsey McKinney: 我对八卦的定义是:两人之间关于不在场第三者的任何谈话都是八卦。这其中既有积极的方面,也有消极的方面。近些年来,人们对八卦的看法发生了转变,不再将其完全视为负面行为。分享信息可以帮助人们建立联系,这在人类学和社会学中已被证实。我从小就喜欢八卦,但我的宗教信仰让我对八卦感到内疚。我曾经有过一次经历,让我开始重新思考我对八卦的看法。区分无害八卦和有害八卦的界限很模糊,恶意传播虚假信息与分享你认为真实的信息之间存在区别。我对人们对自身生活进行“报道”的行为很感兴趣,因为这是一种混乱但又具有保护性的行为。 在与Anna Martin讨论Linda Button的现代爱情文章时,我分享了我对文章中描述的场景的看法,并阐述了我对爱情、关系和八卦的理解。我表达了我对Linda Button勇敢结束一段关系的敬佩之情,以及我对文中人物行为的分析。 Linda Button: 在我的现代爱情文章中,我讲述了通过与前男友们交流,我如何更好地了解自己想要什么样的人,以及如何做出更明智的决定。 我与前男友们的交流让我看清了男友的真实面目,也让我更加了解自己,最终帮助我做出了正确的选择,找到了适合自己的伴侣。

Deep Dive

Chapters
The episode starts by exploring the varying perspectives on gossip, from moral condemnation to acceptance as a social bonding tool. The discussion delves into the complex nature of gossip, challenging traditional negative stereotypes and highlighting its potential benefits in building relationships and sharing crucial information.
  • Gossip is defined as any conversation about someone not present.
  • Sharing information creates bonds, as seen in both social and professional contexts.
  • The speaker's upbringing in an evangelical church instilled a strong sense of guilt around gossip, despite an inherent love for it.

Shownotes Transcript

For Kelsey McKinney, the author of the new book), “You Didn’t Hear This From Me: (Mostly) True Notes on Gossip,” spreading a good story occupied a morally gray zone throughout her childhood.

McKinney, who is also the former host of the podcast, “Normal Gossip),” talks with Modern Love’s Anna Martin about navigating the ups and downs of gossiping in her own life.

McKinney also reads the Modern Love essay “We Were a Party of Two, but Never Quite Alone)” by Linda Button, who tells the story of how gossiping with her rich suitor’s exes brought the euphoria of her relationship back down to earth. While reading Button’s essay, McKinney fields questions from Martin so they can do some gossiping of their own.

How to submit a Modern Love Essay to The New York Times).

How to submit a Tiny Love Story).

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