Matias De Stefano on Life, Death, and Reincarnation | Align Podcast #547
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- Matias DiStefano, thank you for being here. - Thank you. - Did I say your name right, DiStefano? - DiStefano, yes. - Matias DiStefano, thank you, bro. Bro, I really appreciate you, man. I listened back to our last conversation, which I'd recommend people tuning in to. And yeah, whatever channel or frequency or whatever you're tapped into, I really enjoy it. It's very supportive to me, so thank you for bringing it, for being the condo to carrier.

Something that you mentioned in our last conversation that I wanted to unpack more, you referred to death as the greatest of reliefs or one of the greatest reliefs, probably the greatest relief. Her death referred to as like taking off a tight shoe. What is death and what is life from your perspective, Matthias? Well, both are, of course, part of the same wave.

It's just different stages of the wave. So basically, let's say that life is like this moment where the wave is going up. So there's a lot of tension on the wave, the pressure of the water going up. And then death is when the water release the tension down. So let's say that in the flow of everything, there's no separation between life and death.

It's just the tension of existence and then the release of the tension. And so in order to feel the actual release, you have to feel the actual tension. So it's not that, okay, if death is very freeing somehow, so why don't we kill ourselves right now?

because you are not still in the top of the tension of what is life. And tension is not something bad, it's the completion of a whole geometry. So when you complete the entire geometry of that tension, then the release is like the expansion of all that information that you have been holding. So it's not that killing yourself will actually allow you to have a proper death.

actually it's like very it could be very chaotic because you're breaking the point of tension of existence so yeah it's basically that is the beautiful movement of waves and we are so attached to that moment of tension of who we are that moment of relief of coming back to the ocean is like

very frightening for people because it means that you stop the tension, which is you stop to be yourself. All the building blocks of what you have been, what you have created for you to be in that tension, which is your ego, who you are, now it's going to be released. And yeah, it's like giving away all the hard work that you have done. But at the same time, it's so...

so beautiful, so expansive. But yeah, it's just a wave moving up and down. Would suicide or ending one's life, I'm not sure what the proper, most politically correct terminology is for that, be a... What does that mean when you say it's like a break in the tension? Is there something wrong with...

with ending one's life or like what is suicide? Well, it's not wrong or it's not even a sin. Of course, in religion we have this concept of a sin and it's not a sin, it's not bad to end someone's life like when you kill yourself. The only thing is that it's more complicated.

It complicates things. Let's say that you are building a house and you haven't finished the house. You don't know how to...

You haven't put all the things together and suddenly you start to destroy the blocks, to destroy the walls. And not knowing what the house was for or what you could leave inside the house. So you start to break all the walls down and then you have no structure, nothing to rely on. So...

So now you're lost until you have to start to put all the pieces again and build the blocks again, build the walls again. So it takes more time. It's more confusing. And basically you are kind of a mess for a while until you figure out where to leave and what to do and what to create. So that's why people start to say it's a sin or it's wrong just to...

In the same way as religion has said for many years what is wrong and what is right, to try to help people, and they ended up creating a whole bunch of morality that is not real. But at the beginning, it was just to help people, to make it faster, to make it easier.

Like if you meditate every day or you pray every day, your mind will be clearer and so on. So you can help people given certain structures. So one of those structures was don't kill yourself. And we started to believe that is a sin or something wrong that someone can do. But it's not wrong. It's chaotic. I wouldn't recommend it because it makes you lose a lot of time. So...

And who or what is the you that is losing time? Is there a materialized objective definition of the you or the what that is losing time? The soul, mainly. The spirit is never losing time. But the soul is...

the soul is the one that loses time because time is waves. Time is just a pulse of a beating of energy in the universe. So if energy is beating positive, negative, positive, negative, those pulses of positive, negative, which we call the soul, is actually energy. And so energy is not lost, it's always renewed.

But the time that it takes for you to create those beats, that's what we call time.

So when you are building yourself in the universe as a construct of consciousness, you need many bits in order to create a whole image. It's like saying ones and zeros in algebra or in technology. So you need a lot of ones and zeros to be combined to create an image, a color, a system or whatever. So you don't have the complete image of what you are until you created all the bits.

The bits of information, the bits of data, or the hard bits. So until you don't have all of that together, you don't have a complete image. So when you stop the bit and you break the bits, it means that to complete the image of who you are,

or the truth that you are searching for, you have to start all over some of those bits. So that's why you lose time. It's not that, oh, you have to reach somewhere because there's nowhere to go in the universe. So it's not that you have to be somewhere at a specific time, but because we are all trying to complete an image in our brain, in our soul, in the structure of the universe,

Loosing time means that you are not finishing the shape of a sphere, of a triangle, of a cube, whatever you are shaping. That's basically it. So an individual is like presumably a fractal of the broader image of the whole. I'm not exactly sure what the whole means exactly. And...

If the individual fractal kind of fractals out into cacophony or chaos, it doesn't, it's not able to come into that. I don't want to say it.

The completion of the shape. Yeah, is chaotic. And I would imagine any individual experiencing anxiety or fear or suicidal thoughts or ideations or regret or any of the sins in the Bible, I'd imagine there's some cacophony or chaos in the shape of their geometry as an individual.

Is there some completion that the zeitgeist of consciousness of humanity is attempting to go in the direction of some geometrical completion?

And if so, what does that look like? And if so, also, what's after that? Does it dissolve like the sand off of the, you know, does it just go back into the ocean and we just start the painting again or start the tapestry again? Yeah, the shape of the completion usually shapes an egg and a sphere. So when you have a sphere,

the perfect sphere that contains an egg inside. So that is kind of the completion of the geometry. And we are clearly not spheres, but we are made of spheres, which are the cells. So most of our cells tend to shape a sphere because water also tends to shape a sphere. So

is the most common structure of not only the universe but the divine is the sphere, the halo of light that shapes the structure. So when you break the structure you have different things like molecules. So you create different molecules that are basically a sphere that is broken in pieces.

So you create fractalizations. And that's why we have so many different shapes. So it's basically divine fractalized in different angles, let's say. So instead of following the perfection of the sphere, you start to just fractalize it in different angles of light. So what you perceive is completely different from the divine, which is one sphere, but it's all a result of that divine.

So if we would say we are coming back to the origin or we are coming back to the divine, so that means we are all coming back to the sphere. We are all trying to go back to how it feels to be the perfect sphere.

But in order to do that, you have to put together all the geometries. So all the different geometries together, which means you have to experience to be this person, the tree, the animal. You have to experience every possible shape of everything until you become everything. And when you become everything, you have the sphere. It like rounds out the corners. Exactly. Yeah. It brings it very soft, right?

The sphere. So once you accomplish to experience everything, and it's not that one soul has to leave everything, is that you have to transcend the idea that you are separate from everything so you can become everything just by being.

And because there's this thinking also that every living being has to, or every soul has to live everything in the universe, but actually we're all one. So we are already being one living everything. What breaks it apart is the idea of separation, is the idea that we are different beings. So we are not different beings. We are just one being experiencing different ways.

And so when someone don't follow its own wave and destroy its wave, so it takes more time to shape the sphere. So that's basically the idea. Is a square, the shape of a square, somewhat of a immature shape? Not immature bad, but immature in the sense of

do squares eventually evolve to arcs and circles? And it's interesting that at one point we originated from arcs and circles and teepees and things of the sort, and arcs and circles in nature, which is where we emerged from. And now we're in this kind of plane of consciousness where we've shifted into things into being pillars and right angles and squares. And I know that you're moving into a geodesic dome

soon, you know, so your consciousness is kind of being guided into a more circular shape. Does that make any sense at all to conceive of a square to be more of an immature shape? Does that make any sense? Well, let's say this. We are water. We are like 70, 80% water. So what does water? What is water? Water is basically the essence of life.

is basically the archive of mind, of memory. So if you are water, it means that you're not a human. You are water in the shape of human. And as a tree is not a tree, is water in the shape of tree.

So it means that, for example, when you pour water on a jar, the water will take the shape of the jar. If you put it in a glass, it will take the shape of the glass. If you put it somewhere else, it will take the shape of that. So it means that when you move in a space, your water takes the shape of the space. So if the space where you live in is a square, your mind will be structured in a square. But if you live...

in a circular structure, so your mind will start to think in a circular way because your water is going to be adapting to the shape. So that's the shape of the water. So that's why in ancient times you had square structures that give the water an idea of how to create a fundament, how to create matter.

but also you needed a cave or a place that makes you feel that you are in a sphere or in a dome because that gives the spiritual awakening of expansion.

So you need the combination of both mainly, or for example, for meditation is always good triangles and tetrahedrons. So they give you the idea of the Holy Trinity and the three eyes within you.

So all the structures that you use geometrically around shape the water that you have within. So when you move into spaces that have a different geometry, your geometry starts to also adapt to that. And that's why for me, it's very good also to travel, to go to different countries, cultures, because just by moving through it, your inner water starts to shape the geometry of what is around you. That's amazing.

It's kind of like in certain retreat centers and meditation spaces and spiritual spaces of the sort, they'll have those circular walking paths. Have you seen that? Yes. Yeah. That's very fascinating. It's very important for many cultures to have the meetings with the elders or discussions in circular places because that makes everyone important. If you have a meeting in a square,

There are four people that are important and the rest are just movement. So the place where you are, it shapes a lot what you think. Yeah, when I lead classes and workshops on movement and breath work and nervous system regulation, stuff like that, whenever there's space, I will always...

turn it into a circle everything starts as a square and then i shift people around to try to create some type of oval circle and there's a very significant change in the way that the room feels and the way that people feel and everyone feels equally seen which is really nice and i get to lead you know beside occasionally come in front when's necessary and then you know fall back to beside

pretty much as much as possible. And it just the flow of energy and that to me, intuitively feels very good. Do you ever get tired of being this like portal channel person? You ever just be like a bro? I mean, you are you are a bro, which is great. That's something that I like in connecting with you. You are just a silly bitch. I think you're great. I didn't I didn't realize you're like this spiritual guru guy who's like, I'm fucking with you. It's hilarious. I didn't like that.

Yeah, no, I don't like that. Yeah. I mean, I just came from this new world. Like, that's me. No, I don't get tired. Actually, because I combine my life, my multidimensional life with this reality very, very well. Like, I love to mix it. So it's not a problem for me.

What actually gets me very tired is the emotional process of people during the evolution. So it's because it's very complex. And even if I work with people, for me, it's very frustrating and very exhausting to

how we fall in the same patterns once and again, once and again. So that's what actually makes me tired, but not this. What are examples of that? What pisses you off? What makes you tired? Let's say something that usually happens in...

in the spiritual world is that everyone wants to be together and let's do something to change the world because the world is not good and let's change the world and let's get together. But then when, okay, I put everyone together, it's like putting cats and dogs and people that call themselves spirituals create the same conflicts and issues that...

I don't know, governments have or so there you can tell that systems are not the problem. It's more the emotional trauma that every person has. So that is very exhausting for me. Yeah.

Yeah, I find this spiritual cloak gets pretty thin around like sex, money, anything that's like real that kind of like hits it, the kind of more primal aspects of the human. Suddenly like the beads and, you know, the long t-shirts and all that stuff. It's kind of like, oh, okay, right. You're just Bob. You're just a guy. The thing is that...

The pineal, no, the hypothesis gland, you call it in English the pituitary. Hypothalamus, pituitary gland, yeah. The pituitary gland is so connected to, which the pituitary gland, the hypothesis, is the one that opens the crown chakra to the higher self, to all the divine. But at the same time, it's the same gland that controls the main needs of a human body.

So sexuality, food, sleeping. Of course, sleeping is controlled by the pineal gland, but those two glands, the third eye, the vision of everything, and the gland that controls the expansion of the spirit are the ones that regulate our food and sexuality. So when we start to connect to spirituality, suddenly our genitals get more activated.

So all the traumas that we have in our balls, let's say, get triggered before anything else because it's chemically connected. So that's why when we start the path of spirituality, one of the main things that we have to face is that we are not going to the spirit living the body. We're actually going straight to the trauma of it.

And that's terrifying for a lot of people that are going to the spiritual world. So I think that's why it's so exhausting because instead of facing it, a lot of people just decorate it with spirituality instead of talking about the trauma. Spirituality can be like an escape hatch. You're like, this is getting too heavy. I'm going to go to the heavens. I'm up here. Yeah, yeah.

How do you, as a, as a, I don't know, a human guide yourself safely into the contractions and the kind of shadows and the, you know, the quote unquote traumas that,

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The breathing quiz is at alignpodcast.com slash quiz. That's A-L-I-G-N podcast.com slash quiz. I look forward to seeing you guys over there. Well, I allow myself to go deep into them. Like whenever I have a trauma, a conflict, I just allow myself to leave it fully, um,

to face it fully. Like if I go through depression, I want to go deep into that depression. I don't try to go out of it or to try to show up that I'm fine. I usually, if I don't feel fine, if I don't feel well, I just, you will notice

You will clearly notice because I'm I'm I usually speak about it or or or. Yeah, I don't have a problem to on on hiding those emotions or those traumas. I usually speak a lot about them. And and that's that was one of the main things that that people follow when I was doing the project of the I am in 2020, 2021.

Because every conversation that I publish or everything that I said, it went deep into my own personal shit. And for me, it was therapy. It was not teaching. So people were following what I was doing, but for me, it was like constant therapy. So I think that one of the ways that I face it is...

or that I transcended is by allowing it instead of just trying to do something different to feel fine. It's like the wisdom of femininity. Yes. Yeah. To allow it all in. Yeah. Guys see gals as being, you know, like quote unquote crazy because of that. Because they're like present with like, this is what it is.

this moment and I'm gonna feel it and if you as a guy or a masculine person Consciousness, I think it can feel like something that I experience is I feel almost like a frustration or a fear I think it's like a fear if a girl is experiencing an emotion. That's kind of heavy I feel like I'm failing I feel like we're never gonna come out of this I feel like I need to make this style I need to fix this because we're never gonna get out of this and

And in fact, I believe what I'm doing in trying to fix, I'm actually interrupting her in her process. And if I can just trust, you know, and witness, then we can feel all the way through the bottom of that. I think that men, it's interesting and maybe apt that the most common way of death, from my understanding with middle-aged men, is actually them ending their own lives, perhaps because of a bottling up of this stuff that

And the wisdom of femininity is the ability to, as I feel, I move with it and it is, and sometimes it looks ugly and sometimes it's scary and sometimes it's really happy and sometimes it's this, but I just feel all the way I'm just on this ride and I'm just allowing myself the fluidity and the arc like nature to be able to, to ride this shit out. Yeah, totally. Totally. Yeah. I think that's one of the reasons why men live shorter than women. Yeah.

Yeah, it's the ability to allow every emotion and energy, every emotion feeling to be used as energy instead of something that is wrong or right. And yeah, I mean, for myself, every time that I allow myself to live deeply my bad emotions, the leap forward,

of the of the result is bigger than if I try to to just overcome it like because our our society our religion it's all built about being happy so you have to be happy you have to feel fine you have to accomplish this and life is not about that like life life is not about accomplishing something because the only accomplishment you can actually achieve in your life is death

So that's the only accomplishment you have, the only finish of a process that you have is death. So all the rest in the middle is just waves and process. It's not completion. So this idea of I have to do this so I can feel happy is a constant war against yourself

on pushing yourself to edges that maybe you don't have to leave. And that's what takes you to so many traumas because we try to escape from emotions that are happening in that specific moment. And because we don't allow ourselves to feel it and we just want for everything and everyone to be fine, we just accumulate that into the future and eventually it explodes. And that's why we create a trauma.

So I think that the best way is just to allow yourself to feel everything and recognizing that to be a high spiritual being is not about being constantly in samadhi. It's about being everywhere, in hell too. So, yeah. And probably about not...

trying to be something you are not well then that's which is you know that's like a double bind and oxymoron and all sorts of things but it's like like even in the like the you know like i was thinking like i think it's the declaration of the pursuit of life liberty and the pursuit of happiness not the pursuit of life liberty and pursuit of happiness like it's like baked into the language of the foundation of the of the of the country that you know i don't know i was raised in the united states

And as long as you're in that, your language is, you're housed within the language of, okay, I am in the pursuit of. The operating system that you operate from is just you are in the pursuit. You will never be satisfied. That's the nature of your operating system.

Yeah. I think, for example, here in the States, I see a lot because of the cultural structure in your mind of we come from something that is wrong and we have to create our dreams and do everything and be happy and have as much as we can and pursue happiness and all of that.

Which, for example, in other countries like my country or Italy, where I also come from, the pursuit of happiness is completely different. No one is looking for happiness.

The only thing that they look for is to just relax, to have some days free, to share with the family and that's it. And to eat good food. And if you have that...

What else do you need? So it's completely different, the mindset. Well, that's always my question. It's like, where are we going? Like, where are you trying to get to? Yeah, but like Americans would look at an Italian person or a Greek person or whatever and be like, they're great, love them, but they're fucking lazy, never get stuff done, never on time. It's like, well, where are we going exactly? Like, where are you trying to get to, man? Yeah.

Yeah, and that's, I think that's another important thing for our spiritual awakening, which is there's no one way to get there because, of course,

For the Saxon traditions, the Mediterranean traditions are terrible. And for the Mediterranean traditions, the Saxon traditions are terrible. And we are not even thinking about Africa or the natives in Australia. There are so many ways to reach the same point that humanity is not going somewhere altogether.

There are different ways in which you can arrive to the same outcome.

So one of the main conflicts that we have as humanity is that we think in terms of community, thinking we all have to do the same. We all have to go there equally in the same moment or at the same time or do the same things. We had this teacher that explained this once that a few years ago,

a few decades ago, um, there was a study that they did in India to control the population, um, because there were too many people. So they tried to balance the economy and everything. So, okay, let's put a control in, uh, in birth and birth control. Um, so how do you do that? So let's show the American way of living with, uh, the, um,

let's say, a couple with two kids and the car and the house and smiling and we are living together and we have a really good life. But in India, when they saw the image that they were promoting as that's the good way of life, all they could think is poor people, they just have two kids. So they couldn't see the car, the smiling faces, the house. Most of the people just felt

annoyed because they were just two kids and their culture for 6,000 years told them you have to have many kids because that's the way you can have your actual family and that's all that matters. So there are so many different ways of going to where are we going that we are losing time on trying to find one way.

I think. Yeah. It seems like America, the United States, not all of America because Latin America less, but the United States, North America is more like a square.

And I swear is not bad. And I kind of, I kind of like to, to retract my, the, the like squares are immature because I feel like immature can have a negative connotation. I think it's just, there's wisdom in the circle and I feel like there's wisdom in femininity and I feel like women are wise. Like there's like, there, there, it feels to me like there's access, like children, women, there's like access to this.

They're closer to like source energy or like is the way that it feels to me. And if you closer you get to source, the more you'll probably laugh and play and smile and cry and express in that. And then I believe there's something very powerful and valuable about the square as well because it gets things done. It's linear, it's stable, it's like predictable. There's a certain level of certainty in the square.

Too much square leads to fracture, too much circle leads to, you know, there's nowhere to put the water. Like it's like the container that holds the water in a way. Is there something to that? Like how does the square and the circle geometrically support each other? Does that make sense? Yes. It's called Pentakis dodecahedron. Yeah, I thought there'd be a name like that.

Yeah, it's the soccer ball for everyone to picture it. The soccer ball, so it's basically a dodecahedron with an icosahedron together. So that creates the shape of a sphere but giving structure to it. So it's hexagons and pentagons all together. So when you have kind of that structure, it's like the mix of all the powers together.

So it gives the shape of a sphere, but it gives lines and limits on where are the corners of the structure. And for that, in order to accomplish that, you need the integration of feminine and masculine as one. But the integration of feminine and masculine is the creation of the child. It's the joyful creation. That's the mix of both of them.

Today, we are living something more complex and different, which is the healing of a trauma between these two aspects. So it's not the realization, it's the healing of a trauma. And of course, when you are facing a trauma, all the things come up, like pride, for example, you know, trauma.

We are in the pride month right now. And all this thing about being proud about something, it's a masculine energy. But we are trying to put it into a feminine system. So there is a lot of things that are still trauma that is not exactly... That is not done because you are normally...

in balance with feminine and masculine. You are doing that because you are traumatized by something that happened that didn't allow you to be who you are supposed to be. So now you are, instead of just being yourself, you're just showing off, telling the others, look, now I can be what you don't want me to be, you know? So it's a trauma. It's not something happy. It's actually something traumatizing for the cells.

So there's many things like that, that we are going through, which is not bad is the process until we normalize the balance of feminine and masculine within each one of us. So I think we are going, we are going to that direction. But we are going to that direction through the process of healing a trauma. So, and one of the,

One of the things that I feel that most of the people needs to understand between this sphere and square, as you said, either of those are bad. And there's nothing wrong with one or the other or both together. The only thing that happened here is that both has different potentials that you can put together to create a new potentiality. But because those are traumatized,

So we don't know how to figure out the way to put it correctly. So we do it through trauma. So we are creating cultures based in trauma instead of creation. And I think that's one of the main things that we have to have in mind when we try to heal something.

are we doing it from the trauma perspective or are we doing it from the natural evolution perspective? So it's like power versus power versus force in a way. You've heard of the concept like power versus force, like power would be like an allowing and a being forces is like you have your your ego or your perspective of like, you know, your desires, you're going to impose them on this system as opposed to allowing allowing what naturally is arising.

and providing support and safety and facilitation for that. It's interesting thinking of relational dynamics between a man and a woman or a masculine and a feminine or a man and a man or just a masculine. What is sexuality? How does that work? How does some people hetero, some people homo, some people trans, what is masculine and feminine dynamics and how does that hop around between different genital possessing people? How does that work?

Well, sexuality means section, which means to select and to divide. So that's the origin of the word. So basically we describe sexuality as the ability to know if you are this or you are that. So that's the main etymology of the word. So that's why it's how many sex you have? Two.

one section which is masculine and one section which is feminine. So

That's it. So those are the that's that's the section. So then you can sexualize even more that you can say, yeah, I am masculine, but I like also masculine. So you have another section and another section. So you can you can select and sexualize many different layers because basically sexuality is division.

That's what it means, is to divide. So what is the use of sexuality? The use of sexuality is basically to give a role to each person so you know what you are in charge of. Like, for example, in the basics, the basic sexuality is a masculine has to penetrate to give the seed for the feminine to receive the seed and produce life.

and give birth. So you have two specific roles there. So that's perfect. Okay. In biology, you have these two. Now let's go to the soul level. To the soul level, you can have a lot of masculinities that are useful for different things in life and different femininity that can be used for different things in life.

related to who is the leader, who is taking care of the kids, who is taking care of the education, who takes care of the fields, hunting or business or whatever. So those are different sections or sexualities, which are the feminine and masculine powers that you can arise, which is not related to the biological sexuality.

And then you have the mental or the ideas, the mind sexuality, which is the concepts that you have about something. You divide things in sections, like this is good, this is bad, this makes me happy, this makes me sad. So those are different kinds of sexuality, let's say.

All of it is sexuality, if you think it in that way. It's not just about genitals. It's about too many layers. The thing is that the trauma usually is in the genitals. So because the trauma is in the genitals, because it's the origin of who I am, we sexualize everything, the mind, the soul, every chakra, into the genitals. So now the discussion is what is a woman, what is a man?

in sexuality when actually you can be anything you want, like in your mind, in your soul, you can be anything you want. But there's a discussion that cannot be discussed, which is biologically, you are a man or a woman. So it's another type of discussion in these sections of biology.

So I think that, of course, again, we are traumatized by so many no's. You cannot be this, you cannot do that. That we put all sexuality, all the levels of sexuality in your body, in your being, you put it all into specifically genitals.

And that's not just extremism. A person that identifies, a biological man that identifies as a woman or vice versa, a trans person, is that rooted in some form of trauma? Or is that something that is a natural organic expression in nature? Or is it somewhere in between? How does that happen where a person looks down at the objective genitals on their body

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For an exclusive offer, go to buyoptimizers.com slash align and use promo code align10 during checkout to save 10% off on your order. That's buyoptimizers.com slash align, B-I-O-P-T-I-M-I-Z-E-R-S dot com slash align. Use code align10 for discounts at checkout. Well, I had that because I remember a lot of lives being a woman. So my main lives that I remember, I was a woman.

And my whole teenagehood, I was disgusted by being a man because I didn't want to be a man in this life. I remember myself being a woman. So I was like, I don't want to have these genitals. I don't want to have this.

And my main thing was I wanted to be pregnant in this life. And that's one of my traumas. Like I wanted to be the mother of my child myself, not having to wait for someone else to get pregnant. I wanted to go through all the process myself. That was something that I had my whole teenagehood. And even today, like two months ago, I went through that trauma again. So...

So for myself, I also know what it's to be in that position. So I'm not speaking about other people. I'm speaking about myself. So in that perception, I could tell that it's a memory of my water, it's a memory of my mind that had a perception on me

I am a woman, I also know that in my cells the memory is "I am a woman too" So why I cannot be a woman? So of course I went through all this process in my childhood, in my teenagehood of why in this life I am not a woman

And then through all that process, through the understanding and learning how to love the cells and the design that I created for myself in this life, I started to love my body and to choose to be a man, of course, to have the mental, yeah, the choice in my inner self of saying, I like to be a man. I like to be this.

So it was an acceptance of every cell of my body throughout years that took me a while. But every perception that you have of yourself is basically something that is wired in your brain that is telling you what is the truth, even if it's not the truth in the physical world. So what is a trauma? A trauma comes from the word wound.

And all our personality, everything that we are is a trauma because we split from one cell. We cut ourselves in half at the beginning. So everything that we are is a trauma. So by saying this, for example, a man that feels very masculine.

It can be also a trauma because it feels that has to provide the feminine because all his ancestors were doing that. So now he cannot be weak or cannot allow the feminine side of crying if something happens because there's a trauma that tells that a man must be masculine. So

So everything has a trauma behind. So in my case, I had a trauma behind. And it's not a trauma that ended when I was 19. It's a trauma that I even felt two years ago. And it's something that it might show up again in a few years. So the thing is that sometimes when we speak about these situations,

a lot of people that are traumatized by their own cells and their own perception, they believe that we are against these people. Like, I'm not saying you are wrong. I'm just saying it's a perception. It's a perception the same way that my truth is a perception, you know? So I think that if we all actually recognize that

Every perception of every living being is a perception born from a trauma that has been repeated in ourselves for so long. We could get along easily with everybody because no one is going to be defending its own truth and everyone will be accepting the other's perception. The only problem is when you try to defend it as this is right or this is wrong.

So when you try to defend that in the universe, there's nothing right or nothing wrong. So it's just perceptions. So in my own experience, I lived this as a trauma and I still perceive that as a trauma. And I went through all the process until I recognized in this life, my cells are masculine and I allow myself to be a masculine, but I could have chosen the other way, for example. And yeah,

What do you think, I appreciate you sharing that, what do you think of the implications of a person getting a sex change are? Not putting a moralistic right wrong, but one path finding coherence with, ah, here's the objective, you know, matter that I've been endowed with. How do I come into coherence with this plane of reality?

another path, I will change this objective matter and, you know, augment the plane and go down that path. What does that look like between the two? Well, it creates another trauma that maybe in that moment, you don't see it, but eventually it will come up. So it will be another trauma. Every decision that you take in those terms, it's going to be another trauma and your whole

Your whole body structure has specific chakras that regenerate your energy from the genitals. So the genitals are the main base of power in your body. Like all the kundalini energy arises from your genitals. By mutilating the genitals just by a belief, you're taking the source of your own power.

And biologically, you're taking the source of your own power. Mentally, you're not. Mentally, you can do whatever you want. Like in your soul, in your mind, that doesn't affect. It's another trauma, but actually it's another choice in the universe. Like you can do anything you want in the universe because it's infinite. So it's not, as I said, it's not wrong or bad.

I mean, I'm not against it. I'm totally supporting that. Whoever wants to do it, of course. I'm totally supportive in that. Knowing that biologically, the source of your power, the source of your biological power gets distorted and...

And there's an aspect of your being that loses the power. But it can also happen with a disease, like it's, I don't know, or an accident. You know, it's not just because the change of the sex. It can be anything that actually takes the power of your genitals.

Yeah, I think that I had a, I don't know how or why my mind's going to this as a metaphor or story, but I got in a car with a friend the other day and he had a bunch of like dessert treat, like bullshit desserts from like Safeway, like things you don't want to eat, like not good. And they were like stacked up in the back seat. I was like, bro, what are you doing? Yeah.

And I just think it's funny because I'm like, oh my God, like I wouldn't expect you're like a yoga person, like whatever. He's like, yeah, I just, I have this thing, you know? And I'm like, I'm like, I'm like kind of addicted to it.

And what came up to me was like, I have no judgment regardless. But even I don't even have any critique or suggestions or anything as long as one, you're open to mine. And two, you are if you are actively, consciously engaging in this activity of eating this food that, you know, it's, you know, does all the things it's got all the hydra, hydra, whatever bullshit.

and you consciously are engaging in that more power to you. I think it's great. It's when you are unconsciously like out of control and in denial and in deception. And that is the, the, the, the, the tapestry that you're weaving. That's when I'm like, Ooh, I feel like this is maybe something to look at, but if you're consciously engaging in something, I think it's just,

have at it. It's just like, are you actually consciously engaging? Are you consciously smoking that cigarette? Are you consciously hitting that vape pen? Are you consciously getting this sex, genital surgery? Are you conscious as you're going through the process? Yeah, totally. Yeah. When you consciously go through that process, you are going through a process of learning instead of repetition.

Like, for example, I have... I was saying, again, my own thing, so no one feels touched. I have a trauma with sugar. Like, I love sugar. I need to eat chocolate. I need to eat shit. And it's a thing that I have that is like, okay, I go to the supermarket and the first thing that I see is where is the shit so I can buy it. And...

But where is the trauma of that? My grandfather died because of this pancreas thing. How is it called? Diabetes. So the root of diabetes is not being loved. You don't feel love in your life. And my grandfather was the survival of the fifth abortion of my great-grandmother.

So the doctor said, I'm not doing any abortion anymore to you. And that's how my grandfather was born. So my great grandfather didn't love my grandfather. He was like, I don't want this kid because it's a mistake. So he was not loved by anyone in the family. So, of course, he got diabetes.

And the only one that loved him was my great grandmother. So he wanted to die in the same way as his mother. So he did. So in my own story, in my own personal story, I am kind of a reflection of him.

So my way of communication with him was in silence. We barely spoke. We were just... He died when I was nine years old. So my emotional link with him was in silence, listening to classical music and both in the same table. We loved each other, but we didn't engage to each other.

But my way of allowing him to be loved and to feel that he's loved is by enjoying all the sweet things and showing him that I'm happy in life, for example. So I know it's bad for me, but my cells and my trauma is doing that to compensate something that he couldn't have because he wanted to die every day.

So, of course, every stupid thing that we do to ourselves is a trauma that is not even ourselves, it's not ours. But we are compensating things from our ancestors, from our environment constantly, that when you're aware of it, you don't become a slave of it, you use it because of something.

And I have something for sure in this life. I don't care about enlightenment.

Like, that's why I, that's why I usually say to people, don't follow me because I'm the worst example. I think that, I think, I think that that will not that it's a competition or you genuinely don't give a shit, but that will innately accelerate you towards that path. I believe. Am I wrong? Feel free to tell me I'm bullshit. I think I'm bullshit most of the time. But in this case, I think, I think that, I think the desire of being enlightened is a, it's a, it's a, it's like a, there's like a,

It's a block. It's not until you let that go that you even are starting. Well, you're starting the process, but you're actually going to allow yourself the spaciousness to. Yeah, letting go of that is a very, very important aspect of it. But as I said, like some people around me said, like, I can't believe that you are like such a spiritual being and you eat all this shit.

And I'm like, yeah, I know it's bad, but I don't care if I die. Because it's not my... In the infinite possibilities of this existence, that's not my path. I know that that's not what I have come here to do. I have come here to do something else, something different. So...

And I think that when you realize that the bad things that you do in your life or the traumas that you live through, you start to use them as a tool for your own personal life. They start to clarify many things. And there's a moment that you just suddenly don't need it anymore because you're conscious about it. And I believe that today, because of the social media and the...

so much information everywhere we are kind of in a rush to get enlightened we are kind of in a rush to be the good person we are in a rush to do it the best way possible and and i recommend everyone to to watch evolution documentaries i love them because it gives you the perspective of

how a plant took 250 million years to produce a flower. So those kind of things gives you the perspective of there's no rush to evolve. There's no rush to get enlightened. A plant needed 250 million years to get enlightened with a flower.

So it's not something you're going to do in a retreat on Saturday. And when you put it in that perspective of time, you realize that most of us are just living through traumas and we want to heal the world through traumas.

And that's not bad, but you have to realize about it. Like the reason why I do all my project is another trauma. It's not because I'm here because I love humanity. It's another trauma that is useful for other people. So when you realize about that, you can be used by the system instead of being enforced with the system.

That's so good. Well, you got to go. You got things to tend to. There was something I wanted to say after that, but that's okay. I actually, no, I forget. I forget what it was. I had a thing. I was like, oh man, this is good. This is going to be great. Mateus is going to think I'm so smart after I say this. And then I got, no, I'm just joking. I just started thinking I have to go on it. I forgot what I was going to say.

Thank you so much, man. This is really fun. I really enjoy these getting to have these, these conversations with you. Oh, I remember the thing. I remember the thing I was going to say the, so that exact idea that you were, you're sharing. I found that to be the idea of it. It could take many, many lifetimes in order to come to the point of resolve for integration or healing or freaking whatever. Yeah.

That concept has been instrumental in my ability to have compassion for people close to me, such as my parents. And so I think that that for people who are struggling and like maybe like me, they're judgmental or they want to change people or like, I won't be happy until you fit into some construct of what I believe to be the best thing for you rooted in trauma. Like, obviously, um, yeah.

the changing the lens on things of like, maybe they're actually perfect exactly where they are now. And maybe the thing that I just like the vision that I hold for them is is is beautiful. Maybe it is true. And maybe it's not for them, maybe ever, or maybe 10 lifetimes from now, or five lifetimes from now, or 100 lifetimes from now, there's no rush.

And if I can pull back the rush of, oh my God, you're only gonna be this plan for 30 more years. Like I need, ah, I squeeze out the love and I squeeze out the compassion. I squeeze out the acceptance and like the tenderness in the relationship. And I think that if we can start to adapt that perspective of, oh, we have time. It's okay. It doesn't even need to be this. It literally does not need to be this lifetime. You can start to open up more space for love, I believe. Yeah, totally. Compassion.

Compassion. Yeah. Thanks so much, man. I really enjoy getting to get and talk with you. I really, this is, it's yeah, whatever you're tapped into, it's, it's great. It's very cool. Thank you. Yeah. Is there, where can people go? Where, what's your recommendation for people to go in some direction? If there were direction to go from here, is there anything that would be good to learn more about your stuff or?

Or be good from here? Well, of course, if you want to, we are working on trying to put together in a few months a new website where people, the beginners of all this path could say, okay, I can start from here and then follow this, this, this. But by the moment, everything is in the link tree in Instagram. So you can follow me on Instagram, Matias Gustavo de Stefano.

And there's everything. Awesome, man. I appreciate you. And appreciate you all tuning in. That's it. That's all. I'll see you next week.