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Thanks for listening to my call of the day podcast. You can hear my live radio program Monday through Friday from 2 to 5 p.m. Eastern Time on Sirius XM Triumph 111. Tanya, welcome to the program. Hi, Dr. Laura. How are you? Good. What can I do for you?
Me and my husband have been married for 20 years, happily married. He's the love of my life. He treats me like gold. The feeling is very mutual. My problem is I was previously married and my previous husband had an affair on me. And I just can't seem to get over it.
That's the silliest thing you're about to say. Silliest thing. I just can't get over. You just told me you're married 20 years to a great guy who loves you. You love him. You've had a great marriage. So obviously you have gotten over it. That your memory sometimes goes back to that. So what? That's what brains do.
If you see a movie or somebody says something, you might remember back. I could get a spoon, scoop out some part of your brain, and maybe I'd be lucky enough to get that memory out of there, but I think I would just mess your brain up pretty bad. But you've had 20 wonderful years is what you just told me, so you have gotten over it. Not getting over it would look like you couldn't date, you'd be a bitch, etc.,
Okay. So how, one more question, please. How do I bring up my confidence then? Confidence in what? Confidence in what? You're totally confident he won't betray you. You're totally confident of that. You're lying. This is you. You are confident. You just told me in a very confident way. What a great man. You love him. He loves you. You're totally confident. What are you talking about?
It's like you're talking about somebody other than you. Still, I have that fear that something bad is going to happen. It will. He'll die before you.
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Bad things are always going to happen, dear. And you're younger than me. Guarantee you. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. You get hit by a bus. Yeah. Come down with some dread, stupid disease out of bad luck. This stuff happens all the time. So, yeah. But there's not a... If anticipating something bad happening actually had power to keep it from happening, I would be recommending it every day. That's right. You're right. You're just scared. You're scared of life, babe.
And we all are to some extent. I am. To some extent, we all are. That's why you got to refocus. Okay. Thank you, Dr. Laura. I have things that I do when my brain goes into a negative space. What things do you do to get your brain out of a negative space? What do I do? Just...
Try not to think about bad things? No, try not to think of an elephant. The first thing you thought of was an elephant. Come on, stop it. Don't tell me silly things. Bring myself to a better place? Enjoy the things I have? Have you just read too many pop-psych bullshit books? Take a walk, go for a swim, watch a dumb movie, get your nails done. We do things that are pleasant. That's what we do. We do something that's pleasant and or distracting.
We don't entertain. It's like, okay, a bird landed on your head, aka the memory. The bird landed on your head. Don't make it. Don't allow it to build a nest. You're right. And you are totally confident in your man and your marriage. I heard it. Thank you, Dr. Moore. I needed to hear that from you, though. Okay, well, you should have told me this a long time ago. It could have saved you a lot of stress.
Oh, that's why I love you so much, listening to you. I love it. Well, thank you. So go enjoy your great guy. All right, go enjoy him. My number, 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple Podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course, I'd love if you gave me five stars.
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