It's Time for Lynn to Put Her Son in His Place
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Thanks for listening to my call of the day podcast. You can hear my live radio program Monday through Friday from 2 to 5 p.m. Eastern Time on Sirius XM Triumph 111. Lynn, welcome to the program. Hi, Dr. Laura. Thank you for taking my call. You're welcome. How can I help? I have a... I have a...

situation in our family that I was hoping to get your advice on. My husband and I are in our later years. We've been married 42 years. I'm sorry, what are later years? Golden years. What age is that? I'm 67 and he's 77. And we have been retired, but

of the many different businesses we've owned and operated, we still have one that is operating and has a management company that runs it. But my husband goes to that area, which is an hour away, once a week, shows his face,

But Yeti monitors it remotely. So we still have involvement, but not run the day-to-day operation. We have two grown children, two boys that are 38 and 40. They did not decide to go into the business. They both are very successful in their own careers. Both married, beautiful wives. The youngest son has two young children, ages four and two.

They all live one hour from us also near my husband's office. The problem we're having is our oldest son and my husband have, there's friction when we get together. What does that mean? I don't know what that means. Very awkward, not comfortable at,

in each other's presence it seems like there's just some why what happened some underlying well because we're retired but this business is still operating we had a potential buyer come to the table and we thought oh that'd be interesting it's time to move on and our oldest son has a master's in business and finance and we thought you know he's a brilliant kid let's have him join us for these negotiations and hopefully we can strike a deal

Well, unfortunately, he and my husband could not come on the same page when it came to the value of the property. And what was the difference? What was the difference? Help me understand. My husband...

I was not present, but from my understanding, the agreement my husband wanted was a lease with opportunities to purchase the business over time. And at the end of that term, the value of the business was X. Well, our son said, no, the value of the business is not X, it's triple that. Well,

Well, the potential buyer said, no, it's not. And they had words and the potential buyer walked and said, it's becoming too complicated. I'm not interested. So that's when it started, in my opinion, because they were not...

as close when we would have family functions, especially they would bring up business every time. And I, the last get together, I asked my husband, do me a favor, do not talk business because it ruins the whole. Well, why didn't your husband tell your son, I'm going to take the deal anyway?

Why did he let the guy walk? No, he tried. In fact, how do you try? You're out. I don't understand what ma'am don't cut me off while I'm asking the question. I don't understand trying. He simply says it's my decision over with. Why didn't he just do that?

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He did and reconnected with a potential buyer, but the potential buyer said no. Why didn't he do it sooner before the guy walked away? I don't think this is a hard question. Come on. Well, there was a lot of negotiations. There was a lot involved. It's a huge business. And so there was a lot. There was partners involved and lawyers, et cetera. So it wasn't an easy, you know. So your husband doesn't own it. He has people who own it with him. 100%.

No, we own 100%, but there were partners in the potential buyers side that he wanted the partners to come in and talk to. And it got to the point where I'm not bringing the partners in because it's getting too complicated. So who do you think is being testy, your husband or your son? Be honest about this. My husband is very laid back, easygoing. Our son, I think, is the one that is very...

standoffish at this point. Yeah, okay. Okay, stop. I get it. I get it. I get it. I get it. I get it. Woohoo! So what is your question? I think I'm ready. My question is, I invited them for dinner tonight because I don't like things...

the way they are and it's my husband had lunch with him yesterday and my our son brought up all these things from the past that really shocked him and i said i don't like how it ended i want them for dinner and let's talk okay so i'm like okay they accepted the invite but i want your advice

I think you should cancel it. I think you should cancel it. If you want to have a discussion with your son sometime privately, tell him that you'd like to smack him across the head, that he's being arrogant and narcissistically behaving, that somehow because he has all these degrees and this experience that he can topple the king, his dad, in his castle. Not right. He has to show respect.

and behave properly in spite of the fact that his dad didn't agree with him. It's his business. He built it from nothing to being very important. Obviously, that means dad has a lot of savvy. I think your son needs to be taken down a few notches. Coming to dinner is not going to make this better. I guarantee it. Cancel the dinner. Have a private conversation with your son telling him he's a boy. By the way he's acting, he's a boy.

And he wants to eliminate dad and take mom. You know that reference? Yeah, exactly. Okay. Yeah, okay. Okay. He wants to topple dad. Yeah. And that's not going to happen on your watch. And that's the position I believe you have to take. You will not dethrone my man. You will behave with respect. Exactly. Okay.

Well, thank you, Dr. Laura. And stop complaining. You have a very good life. So cut the crap of complaining. You want us to go over all the complaints we have of you since the day you were born? Come on. Give it up. Don't fight dirty. See, that's dirty fighting. Good point. Yeah. When people go back into history in relationships of any kind and go back, well, 20 years ago, you know what you did? That's because they're losing and they're being punitive.

And they just want to cause damage at that point because they're being defensive. Exactly. Okay. Gotcha. So go take care of your man. Okay? No problem. Excellent. I don't think so. I think you're more than strong enough to do this. My number, 1-800-375-2800.

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