Refresher: Leo's friend is in an unhealthy relationship
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Hi, good afternoon, Dr. Laura. Thank you so much for taking my call. My pleasure. What's happening? I'm calling because I want to know, first of all, am I handling this situation? I'm going to explain the right way. And also, anyway, I'll just get right to it. I know you definitely appreciate that. I have a friend who I've been friends with for almost two decades, and I'm divorced, and he is in

in a relationship that myself and other friends don't feel like is really healthy for him, but we supported him as a friend. Based on what? Based on what? Yes, ma'am. Based on their interactions, as far as even publicly, they yell at each other. They've had physical altercations of... Okay, they are well-matched. They are well-matched, Leo.

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At intimacy, they are a match. So if you're a 20-year friend, you take him out for a walk and say, I never knew this about you. Never knew what? That your idea of a relationship was something this contentious and ugly. And I really can't support it, but you need help. This is not a matter of him dumping her. He needs help. Yeah. And a friend would tell him that. Yeah.

Yeah, and my question is, I've done that with him. My question is now, this isn't his girlfriend. Oh, man, man, man, man, man. You did not do that with him. You didn't tell him that he was incompetent to have a relationship and he needed help. You didn't tell him that. Oh, no, no, no. That's a fib. You are fibbing to me. The answer to your call is you have to tell him the truth. He has a problem. He needs help. Okay. Why did you lie and say you did?

I know why. You wanted to get to your question, which had nothing to do with the point. The girlfriend is not the problem. No more than a cheesecake is the problem when somebody overeats. It's not the cheesecake's fault. It's being selected by that person. She was selected. If he could have a healthy relationship, he would have picked a healthy woman. He can't have one. He needs help. Tell him the truth. And he may never talk to you again, and you still will have done the right thing. Okay, I will.

I hope so. But this, I did that. Now let's move on to what I really want to talk about. No, you didn't do that. Because if you did that, then you'd know the girl is not the point. My number...

1-800-375-2872. Please join the growing number of listeners who have signed up for the Dr. Laura family. It's free. You get priority access to things like my Call of the Day podcast and my design store, which features jewelry, glass, and knitted items I personally design and handcraft myself.

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