Creating a Secure Relationship with Elizabeth Earnshaw
Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson
Shownotes Transcript
We all want a relationship that's more than just functional, we want one that's truly fulfilling. On today's episode Forrest is joined by a wonderful therapist and author who focuses on giving people the tools they need to communicate, navigate hard times, and create deeper connections with other people: Elizabeth Earnshaw. They explore:
How the pandemic impacted our relationships
The Gottman approach
The stages of a relationship
Balancing differing needs for intimacy
How to request, and give, repair.
They then close the episode with a fun game focused on debunking common relationship myths.
**About our Guest: **Elizabeth is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, the founder of A Better Life Therapy, and the author of I Want This to Work). You might also know her as @lizlistens) on Instagram, where she’s helped countless people transform their relationships.
**From Dr. Hanson: **The Foundations of Well-Being) brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Our holiday sale is going on now), and podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 for another 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.
**Watch the Episode: **Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube).
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction.
1:45: Elizabeth’s background.
5:30: How did the pandemic impact relationships?
7:30: Responding to stress in relationships.
9:00: Co-regulation.
11:15: Punishing others for our unpleasant emotions.
13:45: The four stages of relationships.
17:50: What to look for in a partner.
20:10: The “Four Horsemen” of bad relationship communication.
24:25: Key skills for navigating conflict together.
27:00: How to request repair from your partner.
34:10: Deciding if you should leave.
37:45: Interdependence.
41:30: Balancing differing needs for intimacy.
46:30: The Instagram Meme Game: Common misconceptions about relationships.
47:30: “Partners should share everything with each other.”
50:30: “Your partner should be your ride or die.”
52:15: “Never go to bed angry.”
54:50: “My partner is my missing piece.”
56:35: “If you can’t handle me on my worst day, you don’t deserve me on my best day.”
1:02:05: Recap.
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