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cover of episode How to Get Your Life Together: The 90/10 Rule

How to Get Your Life Together: The 90/10 Rule

2025/3/10
logo of podcast Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

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Forrest Hansen
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Rick Hansen
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Forrest Hansen: 我认为,在自我提升领域,90/10原则非常适用。成功并非依赖于掌握大量专业知识,而是在于找到核心要素并坚持执行。简单、枯燥、有时困难但正确的事情才能持续带来改变。复杂的自我提升建议反而会让人难以行动,因为人们容易被细节所迷惑,而忽略了根本性问题。 我将幸福感分为三个方面:工作效率、人际关系和整体满足感。每天在这些方面有所投入,就能提升睡前幸福感。持续努力非常重要,即使看到成效也不应停止。 对于大多数人来说,幸福感的90%取决于这三个方面的良好状态。持续关注并投入精力在重要领域,才能获得大部分积极结果。卓越之人的成功源于长期坚持日常行为,而非短暂的巨大努力。要重视人际关系,加强积极关系,减少消极关系。 此外,自我调节能力和与想法保持距离也很重要。自我调节能力是应对压力和保持韧性的关键,而与想法保持距离能避免被负面情绪控制。 要保持一致性,需要积极的自我认知和自我关怀,理解并化解内在阻力,并为他人着想。 Rick Hansen: 人生就是一个不断犯错的过程,人的思维倾向于复杂化,需要学习如何简化思维。专注于重要的事情需要放下自我,需要谦逊才能专注于最重要的事情。人们容易陷入“已经做了足够多”的错觉,而忽略持续努力的重要性。 人们往往试图在错误的层面解决问题,关注产生重大影响的关键因素,即具有显著效果的关键步骤。幸福感的关键在于解决生活中最缺乏的因素,正直和道德操守对幸福感至关重要。要学会放下过去,减轻心理负担。 保持积极自我认知和自我关怀才能坚持下去,明确目标,并使目标具有吸引力,才能保持动力。为他人着想能增强坚持的动力。 从下而上的自我调节,例如放宽心态和培养慈悲心,有助于应对压力。一次只专注于一件事情,循序渐进地提升自我。

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There’s never been more information out there about psychology, self-improvement, and mental health, making it easy to get lost in the details and lose sight of what matters. In this special episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick apply the 90/10 rule to psychology and self-help: what are the small handful of things that tend to make the biggest difference for people?

You’ll learn why most self-help advice should probably be ignored, how to simplify your approach to happiness and personal growth, and what actually moves the needle when it comes to feeling better, getting unstuck, and building a fulfilling life.

You can watch this episode on YouTube).

Rumination Course: Rick’s 5-week online course Breaking Out of Rumination starts on March 29th. Rumination is a big pain point for many people, and this course will help you learn how to break repetitive patterns of thought. Learn more at RickHanson.com/ruminating), and use coupon code BeingWell25 to receive a 25% discount.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

2:00: Putting the big rocks in first

8:40: Root factors of well-being

15:15: Satisfaction, and what helps us rest easy

26:05: Avoidance, and responding to our own objections

32:35: Finding what matters to you, spirituality, and creative expression

36:25: Small, consistent action

39:50: Relationships and the power of repair

43:00: Stress, self-regulation, and creating space around your thoughts

48:55: Identifying your broken link, and the role of integrity

53:30: Allostatic load, and acknowledging when you’ve done your best

1:00:00: Being on your own side, pursuit mindset, and benefiting others

1:03:40: Self-concept, and joining the defense

1:06:00: Bottom up regulation, and taking one thing at a time

1:10:35: Recap

I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.)** **

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