Al Qaeda And Some Vodka - December 24th 2024
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Bye.

It is December 24. I hope you enjoyed my story about Madame President in Kyrgyzstan. I have plenty of other stories from my past life and I am happy to share them with you. It helps me distract myself from our rather grim present and it might help you understand me better. Today I will tell you more about the same trip during which I met President Rosa Atunbayev. This one is a story about Al-Qaeda.

During the 2010 revolution in Kyrgyzstan, some of the main events took place in a city called Osh. It was the hometown of the president who had been ousted by the revolution and most of his inner circle. They tried to consolidate their power there, but they failed due to the fierce resistance of the people.

I was in the local regional government building when it was stormed by protesters. The building was defended by supporters of our state president Kurmanbek Bakiev. They formed a human chain armed with sticks, rebar and stones facing a massive crowd wielding similar weapons. About a half a mile away a unit of local police, about a hundred officers stood in a grove.

They did not intervene, but simply observed the brawl. Fortunately, it ended rather quickly and without significant bloodshed. The former president's supporters fled when they realized they were vastly outnumbered.

Only when did the police approach the building. Their major bumped a cigarette off me and complained about how the world was seeing Kyrgyz people at their worst, armed with sticks and stones. The police lined up along the facade of the government building, while a rally of the victorious crowd began in the square in front of it.

I watched the scene unfold, standing among the crowd. The weather was beautiful, people were happy. The only eyesore was the massive Lenin monument around which the pro-democracy rally took place, a relic of Soviet times.

There are still thousands of such Lenin statues across the post-Soviet space. In the middle of the crowd two young Kyrgyz men in suits approached me. One whispered that they were from the local branch of the main security service, the National Security Committee, and discreetly showed me his idea near waist level so others wouldn't see.

The other carefully moved his jacket aside to reveal a pistol underneath. The first one politely asked me to follow them and warned that it was in my best interest to comply.

We left the crowd and walked through nearly deserted streets. Most residents were either at the square or hiding at home, fearing further street battles. After about 10 minutes we arrived at a police station and entered it.

It was just as empty. My two escorts led me to a back room where a middle-aged civilian man sat looking visibly nervous. Now, with all three of them, they began questioning me. They were convinced I was one of the instigators of a revolution in the city. They asked who

who had sent me and even answered their own question: Al-Qaeda. Their propaganda had been spreading the narrative for weeks that Al-Qaeda was behind the unrest, trying to turn Kyrgyzstan into a caliphate. And there I was, obviously not a local with a long beard, wearing cargo pants, which are popular among journalists and jihadists alike. Naturally, they decided I was a terrorist.

I started explaining that I was a reporter, merely observing events, and that I had nothing to do with Al-Qaeda. At this, the man in the room pulled out a bottle of vodka and a plastic cup from his drawer. He poured about half the cup and handed it to me. "Here, Bin Laden, prove you are not an Islamist," he said, fully aware that Muslims are strictly forbidden from drinking alcohol.

Kyrgyzstan is almost entirely a Muslim country. Yet I often saw vodka there. It freely sold, consumed at celebration and casually, while those who don't drink are regarded as very religious. I drank the vodka and asked if I could have some more. The three of them burst into laughter and told me I'd proven I wasn't a jihadist and was free to go.

So, that's my Christmas story for you. If you enjoyed it, feel free to send me your regards using the details in the episode description.