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cover of episode #51 - *SPECIAL* What No One Tells You About the Growth You Experience When You Choose Family Over Career with Heather Morehouse

#51 - *SPECIAL* What No One Tells You About the Growth You Experience When You Choose Family Over Career with Heather Morehouse

2025/3/27
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In Bloom with Ela Richmond
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Heather Morehouse: 我在相对传统的家庭长大，但因为在家上学，我的成长轨迹与大多数人不同。我的生活没有规律，充满了各种各样的活动，从家庭学习到外出购物和参加课外活动。我从小就需要独处时间，喜欢在户外探索和玩耍。随着年龄增长和孩子增多，我需要独处的时间变得更难获得，所以我学会了在日常琐事中寻找独处和放松的方式。我一直很清楚自己的需求，但为人母后，我不得不为了孩子而牺牲一些个人时间，这让我学会了平衡自我需求和家庭责任。我母亲的全职主妇身份并非轻松，我们家境贫寒，但她坚持陪伴我们，让我非常感激。我从小就知道自己会成为一名全职母亲和家庭教育者，尽管我并非对此充满热情，但我明白这是我的选择。我年轻时有很多职业规划，但成为母亲后，我选择成为全职妈妈，照顾孩子。在为人母的过程中也经历了自我成长，因为我需要在照顾孩子的同时，也学会照顾自己。我起初的育儿方式比较被动，直到孩子长大后，我才开始认真思考并改进我的育儿方法。个人成长和为人父母是相互关联的，个人的成长会直接影响到育儿方式。我是外在驱动力的人，只有当我觉得自己做得不好或感到羞愧时，我才会努力改进自己。在努力成为更好的父母的过程中，我经历了身心上的变化，并与家人建立了更紧密的联系。我通过阅读和祈祷来处理自己的问题和创伤，并努力成为更好的人。对自身缺点的坦诚面对，改善了我与家人和自己的关系。我对成功的定义与大多数人不同，我认为家庭和睦、子女健康成长就是成功。我的人生目标是养育优秀善良的孩子，并追求自身的成长和完善。我希望在未来尝试新的领域，例如将我对草药学的兴趣商业化。我对自己的了解和接纳是一个持续的过程，并非一蹴而就。阅读、独处、帮助他人，这些都能帮助人们更好地了解自己。我对家庭教育的理解和实践是不断摸索和调整的过程，根据孩子的需求和我的经验不断改进。年轻女性在选择家庭教育或全职主妇身份时面临的困难，一部分源于社会对传统生活方式的偏见。将人生视为由不同阶段组成，可以帮助人们更好地应对生活中的挑战和变化。克服生活中的枯燥和乏味，需要积极调整心态，并寻找乐趣和意义。积极乐观的心态可以帮助人们克服负面情绪，并更好地应对生活中的挑战。我和丈夫的婚姻关系之所以能够长久，是因为我们彼此相爱，并共同努力克服生活中的困难。我和丈夫在婚姻中共同成长，并始终坚持彼此陪伴。婚姻意味着在伴侣遇到困难时，彼此陪伴和支持。在婚姻中，我最引以为傲的是我们依然彼此相爱，并能一起享受生活。想要找到合适的伴侣，首先要做好自我提升，并积极寻找拥有共同价值观的人。一段成功的亲密关系需要双方共同努力，并愿意为彼此付出。我最大的遗憾是年轻时没有学会如何理财，这导致我后来在财务管理方面遇到很多困难。想象力可以通过阅读、独处和观察来培养。阅读简·奥斯汀的小说，让我对女性的品质和生活有了更深刻的理解。 Ella: Heather 以独特的视角看待全职母亲的角色，并从中找到了自我价值和成就感。 supporting_evidences Heather Morehouse: 'That is such a hard question to answer because I feel like I'm coming and going all the time and no day is the same.' Heather Morehouse: 'I think I always knew it, and I just naturally took that time for myself when I was younger.' Heather Morehouse: 'I love that my mom did that. And I love that it was hard. It was a sacrifice.' Heather Morehouse: 'And then I settled on social work because I love adoption. I've been passionate about it since I was a kid.' Heather Morehouse: 'I think that if I had not had kids right away and started a career, I think that would have been like oh my gosh, this adult stuff is really hard.' Heather Morehouse: 'I thought I was doing well for a long time. But it was I was really just like treadmill parenting.' Heather Morehouse: 'Always. 100%. 100%. And I would say your kids are going to push against your weak spots.' Heather Morehouse: 'I'm more extrinsically motivated like if I don't feel well or if I feel the shame of people around me I will work on myself like' Heather Morehouse: 'I felt like I had to kind of just lay it all bare.' Heather Morehouse: 'But I did a lot of praying and really being sorry for the mistakes I've made that I can still remember.' Heather Morehouse: 'being gut-wrenchingly honest with myself about the things I really dislike and the ways in which I've been like' Heather Morehouse: 'Oh my gosh, I've asked myself this question. I don't know if I know.' Heather Morehouse: 'I want to raise kids who are good people and love God and finish their life strong.' Heather Morehouse: 'But I feel like it's time for me to start switching gears just a little bit and thinking about what's next.' Heather Morehouse: 'I am at times. I have moments. I have gone through times of depression throughout my life.' Heather Morehouse: 'Read a lot. Read a ton. Put your phone down and read a ton.' Heather Morehouse: 'I think in some ways I de facto defined it myself.' Heather Morehouse: 'I think it won't be as hard in a few years, but the whole, the age we've been in has has been very against that.' Heather Morehouse: 'I feel like everybody's on this. bare belt life.' Heather Morehouse: 'I think the way to rethink motherhood now is probably in seasons.' Heather Morehouse: 'That's a challenge in life for everyone.' Heather Morehouse: 'That's what, that's what's going on here.' Heather Morehouse: 'Gosh, yeah. 21 years and we've gone through phases of growing.' Heather Morehouse: 'Yeah. Oh, yeah. Like there's, there's no way out.' Heather Morehouse: 'Her husband ends up having a disease and then she has to take care of everything.' Heather Morehouse: 'I'm really proud of the fact that we still like each other.' Heather Morehouse: 'I also really feel like if you put your phone down and you just do really hard inner work on yourself' Heather Morehouse: 'I'm terrible myself, naturally. I'm terrible with money.' Heather Morehouse: 'It's hard for me to answer because I've been a reader my whole life.' Heather Morehouse: 'But I read her, I started reading her when I was maybe 20, and then I reread all her books probably every decade since.'

Deep Dive

Chapters
Heather Morehouse, a homeschooling mother of four, shares her journey of prioritizing family over career and the unexpected personal growth she experienced. She emphasizes the importance of viewing life in seasons, the profound impact of self-parenting, and the transformative power of self-honesty.
  • Prioritized family over career
  • Views life in seasons
  • Process of self-parenting led to personal development
  • Self-honesty transformed family and personal relationships

Shownotes Transcript

Are you terrified that choosing family over career means giving up on your own growth and identity?

Heather Morehouse is a dedicated homeschooling mother of four and family-focused woman, serving as the backbone of the Morehouse household for over two decades. With 20 years of experience in child development and home education, she has raised remarkably well-adjusted children while maintaining her own journey of personal growth and discovery.

In this refreshingly honest episode, Heather shares her journey of choosing family over professional ambitions and the unexpected transformation that followed. She offers valuable insights on:

  • How viewing life in seasons rather than trying to "have it all at once" creates freedom and reduces pressure
  • Why the process of parenting herself while parenting her children led to profound personal development
  • How being "gut-wrenchingly honest" with herself transformed both her relationship with her family and herself

Heather's story demonstrates how young women can find meaningful personal growth and fulfillment without following conventional career paths or societal expectations.