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Welcome to Can't Believe Reckless, the production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. Nice, nice little ass back there. Nice little ass, nice little ass.
Yo, yo, what up? We back on the air. It's your girl Just Hilarious with another episode of Carefully Reckless. Now listen, today's topic is mental health, mental illness and mental health and how important it is to get a hold of it before it gets out of control. Now get your tea, get your halls and get all of that shit because it's story time.
Now, I went to a predominantly white high school. I know I said this a couple times in previous episodes, but just in case you're a new listener, there's a fun fact about me. Now, back in high school, I went to prom with one of my white homeboys. No, we didn't date. He was just my homie. He didn't want to take his girlfriend. I didn't have a boyfriend at the time, so he took me. He was cool. I loved him, and I also loved his mom as well. His mom was very, very nice.
very, very close to me. I grew to love her. She loved her kids. She loved her family. She had a twin sister that she also loved dearly. Now I can tell his mom was off a little bit. You know what I'm saying? And she did have mental issues, but she was always there as a mom for them kids. She was always there as a sister for her twins. She was always there as, you know, like a confidant for her children's friends.
All of that. She was the cool mom. We hung out at her house and everything like that. She did not let us drink. She didn't let us smoke weed or nothing. We just was there to have fun. Now, our twin, on the other hand, was the other type. You know, we could go to her house and smoke. We can go to her house and have bonfires and shit. We can we can go to our house and drink with her and all that type of shit. She felt like if they're going to do it outside, they might as well do it in here. They're safer high and drunk in here. A lot of parents think like that.
My parents, fuck no, whoop my ass every time. But I went over there to have fun. I was with a lot of white kids. I was one of two black kids amongst 20 white friends, you know. Now, her kids didn't have any issues. She had two boys. Now, I'm not going to say her name because this was a very tragic situation and I'd just rather not.
Now, if you know, you know, if you went to high school with me, you know who it is. And it was very sad situation. One day, my family had dinner at their house. My parents, they had a dinner and invited some of my friend's parents from school. You know, now the guy I went to prom with, his mom came. Her twin came as well. Everything was fine. We noticed that my friend's mom was in the bathroom for a long time. So my mom went up and checked on her.
She came back and told me everything was fine with her. She just, you know, she had to use the bathroom, just getting her mind together. We noticed that she was not right in the head that night. She was going through a mood. She was having like, I would call it one of her mental episodes. She was down. She would get down sometimes and then out of nowhere, she'll pop out of that shit and be just happy and jolly. Like always, beautiful person inside and out. She just had, she had her mental issues though. You know what I'm saying?
And that night we could tell something was wrong with her. But by the end of the dinner, she was back good. She was good. The next day we go to school. We didn't see her kid. Okay, cool. Whatever. But her twin sister had children that went to the same school too. We didn't see them either. All right, cool. I ain't hearing nothing that day. Next day, didn't see them in school again.
I drove over to my friend's house after school, me and a couple of my other friends. Right now, the house we went to was the more lenient twin, the twin that we could the party house. You know, we can go smoke and drink and shit. Cool. We go over there because I didn't remember the other twins address, but I remembered exactly how to get to the party twins house because we partied there all the time, almost every day at the school.
Now, pull up to the house. It's a lot of cars. Now, I recognize these cars. These are other friends that go to school with us. They had the same idea. Let's go over here. Our friends ain't been in school. We ain't heard nothing. We ain't get invited over for party in the last two days. Let's go. It's like seven, eight cars out there. We walk in. Everybody's quiet. We hear a scream. We hear crying. I go to the bathroom. I ask my homegirl, Kate. I'm like, what's wrong? What's wrong? What happened? My homeboy's mom killed herself.
Killed herself. She left a note, but she killed herself. She apologized to both of her boys, her twin and her nieces and nephews. She apologized greatly, deeply, but she couldn't deal with it. She was running from something. Something was fucking with her and she could not escape it. She put a bullet in her fucking head in her garage.
And left a note next to her. That shit is sad. And it still brings me to tears till this day because she was mentally ill and nobody gave a fuck. Nobody noticed. Nobody tried to get her help. Nobody. Nobody did nothing about that. You understand what I'm saying? She loved everybody else. Always looked out for everybody else. As mentally strained as she was. As mentally draining as it probably was to...
Have to live a facade, have to paint a picture that everything is perfect, but under it is dirty concrete and mold and dirt. And what I'm saying is she was mentally fucked up and she still found a way to care for everybody. But in return, nobody cared enough to get her help. And it's like, we noticed it. Everybody noticed it. Her sister, her parents, everybody, they noticed it. Her kids' teachers, like everybody.
noticed that my parents, everybody noticed that her kids, but nobody did anything. Nobody did anything. Nobody ever sat down and said, babe, you want to go see this person? You need to see a therapist. Do you want to talk to me? Do you want to open up? Do you, what are you feeling right now? Why do you get so down? It's everything. Instead we would let her tell us, oh no, I'm just not feeling well today, but we knew it was something more than that. Sad day, a very, very sad day.
Her kids were highly affected. They didn't return to school. They finished the rest of the school year homeschooled. They were so fucked up by that. She put a bullet in her head. She just could not deal with it anymore. That's what she wrote in the note. If you love me, you'll listen to this commercial and then we'll be right back. Here's a little secret. Most smartphone deals aren't that exciting. To be honest, they're barely worth mentioning. But then there's AT&T and their best deals.
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State Farm Insurance also cares about the growth of black communities. They're actively investing in programs and initiatives that help provide financial literacy, give early career advice, and grow black-owned businesses, thus leading to generational wealth, which helps protect the future of our communities. We want to build a future that we all can be proud of.
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State Farm believes that being better neighbors creates better communities and can have a long lasting impact. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. So that brings me to carefully reckless discussion. When people are mentally ill and you see it, you got to say something. You got to say something. You cannot ignore people. You got to check up on people. You have to start noticing their patterns and how fast people change and just different patterns, you know, because...
When you hang around somebody or you're around them or when you date them or whatever, your sibling, whoever it is who has these issues, if you've been knowing them for a long time, you start to notice certain things about them. If they act one way one moment and that's what you're used to and then they totally flip, you got to notice that that's a sign. You cannot ignore signs. You
You got to check up on people. You have to go the extra mile, even if you get on a motherfucker's nerves. No, what's wrong? What's going on? What's going on? What's this? Why? Why are you feeling this way? You need to talk to me. Sit down and talk. If they run, you chase their ass. You really need to help somebody with mental illness. You don't know how you could possibly save somebody's life by just paying attention to them.
Taking the initiative to help. You don't know how you can save a life. You can change somebody's life. I feel like we could have definitely saved that woman, my friend's mom. We could have gotten her help. We as in everybody. I mean, we, cause I was a part of the we. I would hang around her. I would be in her house.
And listen, she was the type of woman, she would come over to our friend's house, the party twin, and she would be like, "Guys, stop drinking." Yo, she would pour out the liquor. She would tell everybody, "Now put those blunts out, put those joints out." No, no, like she was not, she was a great mother, a great mother. She would beef with her twin for letting us party in her house.
They're children. They're just fucking children. They're drinking this poison and they shouldn't be. They should wait until they go to college to do this. They're children. Why are you letting them do whatever they want? They're innocent children. She was such a great person. Do you understand? Of course, her and her twin had two different ways of living. Raised in the same house. One was just more strict. And she was a very spiritual woman as well. Ain't that crazy? Isn't that amazing? She used to pray for us. Oh my God.
No, she wasn't a radical at all. Don't get it messed up. But she definitely embodied spirituality as a Christian woman. She definitely prayed. She went to church. She was a good woman. And even with all of that, she was still mentally ill. She still had her own demons that she was fighting. And we didn't know how to help her fight them. So we just let it be. We would let her lie to us. You cannot do that.
Now, listen, most mentally ill people are in denial. So we have to help them. They can't often even think for themselves because they're not in their right mind. How can you expect someone to want help for themselves if they're not even in the right state of mind to even know just how fucked up they are? A lot of them know that they suffer from mental illness, but they don't know the severity of it because they're not mentally aware all the time.
Mental illness can drive you to do crazy things. It can drive you to suicide, drugs, homicide. They may even start killing other people, hurting other people, inflicting pain on people around them because they're not in their right mind. And she can get very sad and out of hand. That's why I don't care what y'all say. I do applaud Kim Kardashian for sticking by Kanye West.
We didn't know what that woman went through. We didn't know. People just hate them girls because they're culture vultures. So people say or they, you know, they're taking our black men and the old the Kardashian curse. No, no, no, no. Kanye was fucked up before him. OK, he's been fucked up since his mother died and he's going to be fucked up until he gets the help that he needs for himself.
We can't keep putting shit on the Kardashians. We can't put nothing on Kim. We can't do that. Wake the fuck up. She loved him. We saw that. She had what? How many fucking kids? They got five, four fucking kids. I'm sorry if it's just about me being a culture vulture and wanting to get money off this man or whatever the fuck y'all believe she wanted from this man. I'm not going to lay down and have a child. No, she didn't physically have all of
Four of them. But she had children. Four children by this man. And y'all want me to believe? Y'all want to believe in y'all sick ass minds?
that she cursed him or she didn't really love him. I'd be saying in the comments, like, you know, I'd be saying all types of crazy shit. Y'all are blaming her. And a lot of people, not y'all, you know, but a lot of y'all blame her for this divorce. No. Do you know the, the strain that was put on their marriage? Could you imagine that?
Being with a mentally ill person who doesn't even want help, who constantly embarrasses you and your family and your children and himself.
online when you have an episode you go to the internet Kanye is also a very manipulating person we have those mentally ill people as well who are also manipulating he uses his mental illness a lot to get us to buy his shit his shoes his albums his whatever now I'm a Kanye fan by far please don't get it fucked up but also I know for a fact that he uses his mental illness a lot
And a lot of these people do. But that does not mean that they are not mental ill. They just know how to play it. Trust me. He's very, very ill. Or he was. I don't know. We haven't heard anything from him since. But I'm just saying, I don't know if he's getting the proper help now. It's really good if he is. Orlando Brown. We have seen firsthand his mental illness. And
Now he has help and now he's doing better than he was, but he had friends that would record him and put the videos online instead of trying to help him. Now, I'm not saying that they never tried to help. I don't know. But the last thing I'm going to do is know that I have a friend that's mentally ill and record them having an episode and putting it online. It's a difference between raising awareness and then just
plain downright exposing somebody. And that's what a lot of people in Orlando's life did. They exposed him. The videos that they would record and put out there that would hit the media. Do you think that helped him to see that shit? No, it didn't. Mental illness is a very serious thing. You have to make sure you check on people. You help them and don't do it for the fucking clout. Don't record it when you do it. Some shit is just better left unposted.
It's not for everybody to know. Also, we have social media. Social media, it doesn't help with mental illness. It doesn't help mental health at all. We got these trolls, these people that hide behind these fucking accounts. They are cruel. They say what they want. And nine times out of 10, a motherfucker would never say it to your face. A lot of these trolls online, they're even mentally ill as well.
So before you clap back at a troll, just think about where they are mentally. That's why y'all don't see me clapping back too often anymore. You have to take into account everybody ain't really right up there. And a lot of people inflict pain and cruel insults on other people because that's what they're feeling. They can't look in the mirror and realize how ugly the inside of them is. So they project that shit on other people. Those people need help as well.
You know, I deal with it. I deal with it a lot, but I'm very strong. I got tough skin. Of course I break down sometimes. Not ever from a motherfucker online, but real life shit gets to me. You know what I'm saying? That's the shit I let break me down. Not a motherfucker sitting behind a fake page. People want to see people fall more than anything these days. Negativity fuels evil. You would rather hear something negative about a person than to compliment a positive person.
A lot of younger kids, a lot of teenagers suffer from mental illness that stems from societal rules, social media societal rules. Kids have committed suicide trying to live up to these views and societal rules. A lot of teenagers are damaged by this shit. The internet is a very evil fucking place. It's a gift and a curse, I say all the time. For people like me, it's a gift.
For people like me, it's a curse as well. You know what I'm saying? I make my money online. I'm an influencer. You know, I'm a public figure. Growing up, all everybody want to do is be famous. Being famous was like a goal, an African-American dream. Everybody wants to be famous.
Until now, being famous ain't so fun, especially not now. Like social media influences so much. The influence is so strong. The Internet controls a lot of people's minds. That leads to mental illness as well. I don't know if y'all listening can understand what I'm getting at and where I'm going. A lot of social trends, a lot of people let it depict their life.
You let the internet dictate your life. I'm just speaking in general about people that I've seen. It has affected firsthand. You have to help people. You know how they say hurt people, hurt people.
Helped people help people. You know, if I help you over here with your mental illness, you can help somebody else with theirs. And then that person can help somebody else. Help people help people. You understand what I'm saying? It may sound crazy, but I know what I'm getting at. And so do y'all. Now we got a commercial. And if you click off this podcast, I swear I'm gonna beat your ass. Listen.
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Now I'm going to leave all of these people anonymous. I'm not going to disclose anybody's names, even though they asked me to. I'm still not. One beautiful young lady said,
So she had a real low day recently and messed with me until I smacked her in the face and she couldn't take it. So we all got kicked out of our house. She cares about her money, but she does not care about her mental. And I hope it just doesn't make her crash and burn. She's completely ignoring because of her status.
She doesn't want to be thought of as someone that has mental illness, but she's clearly sick. Now, listen, that brings back the denial factor. Nobody wants to suffer mentally. Nobody does. So a lot of people try to sweep it under the rug. But a lot of things you can't control mentally. You can't control your illness. You can't. If you don't get any help, you can't control it.
So I do totally understand. But you still got to try. You smacked her in the face. You may have to smack a few more times before she realized that she has to get diagnosed and she has to be helped. Go after her, baby. Go after her. That's your sister. You can save her life. It's not easy dealing with people who are mentally ill. No, it's not. But how do you think they feel? We still have to suit up and boot up and get it together for them.
I'm going to read another one. Jess, my mental illness has caused me to lose a very special female. There we go. Look at Kanye. I don't know who filed divorce. I'm not sure. At first they said Kanye did. Then it came out that Kim did.
It can cause you to lose people in your life. It can cause you to lose your children. It can cause you to lose yourself. Get help, baby. Get help. You know, the first step is knowing, coming to terms with it. Okay, I'm mentally ill. At least you know. You confessed. You already told me. You admitted to knowing that you're mentally ill. Now go get help so you can go get that female back if you can.
I'm going to read another one. Yes, Jess, it has you being busy when your body is tired. It
Exactly. And I think that's what happened to my friend's mom. She was just so tired. Her body was tired. She couldn't deal with it. So she killed herself. That's what we don't want. I'm going to read one more. Ignoring my mental health resulted in me blowing the dope, smoking heavy. I did it to feel more calm and at peace, not realizing I was depressed. Now, when I go through challenges, I try to be sober so I can actually push through and not bandage it.
That's very, very, very sad, but it's very common in mental illness. People turn to drugs. I said it at the beginning of the episode. People turn to bad habits. People even hear voices. They try to get them out. Mental illness has different levels.
We need to help these people conquer these battles before it gets to the worst level. I need you to get help, baby. I don't want to say your name, but I need you to get help. This person just admitted that they started a drug habit. They was smoking dope just to escape, but not realizing when you come down off that high, you back where you was.
You got to get the help. Now, all the people that wrote me, they never said anything about help. I've read a lot and I've sat with this overnight. It's sad how many people deal with this.
In our country and right up under our nose. You don't know how you can save a life by helping somebody. Just help. Just check on people. Pay more attention to your spouses, your kids, your children, your parents, your family members, your friends, your boss, your coworkers. Pay attention to people. Pay more attention.
A lot of people may call it nosy or I mind my business. Nah, it's the difference between paying attention and being nosy. Sometimes you gotta be fucking nosy to get to the bottom of a situation to help somebody because ain't nobody gonna offer up that they're mentally ill. You gotta figure it out.
So please, let's just come together as a people and pay more attention and help people. And on that note, I'm going to end this episode of Carefully Reckless. I hope this has helped someone. I hope this has touched someone. If you feel like you need someone to just listen to you, DM me. No, I can't give you my number. I love you, but I can't give you my number. But I will send voice notes all day to you. And if you know me and you're one of my fans, you know I send voice notes to fans all the time.
And just like that, I concluded, and I love y'all because y'all love me. And next week, I'll be back with another episode of Carefully Reckless. And in my deepest Pam voice, yet sexy, peace.
Carefully Reckless is a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. I'm a good lawyer, and I want to win. I think I killed JT.
She needs someone who's going to fight for her. If we don't follow the right plan, we lose. The hit series Reasonable Doubt, now streaming on Hulu. She was defending herself against a monster. Starring Emma Yatze Coronaldi. I'm the best lawyer you have ever worked with. And Morris Chestnut. I'm not gonna stop. I think I love it, love it. Never underestimate.
The power of attorney. Always bet on Jags. Reasonable Doubt. New episodes Thursdays. Streaming only on Hulu. Gear up for outdoor adventures with the 2024 Nissan Pathfinder. This midsize SUV is designed for epic journeys. Offering spacious seating for eight, available panoramic moonroof, and an available intelligent four-wheel drive feature with seven drive modes. Take your off-road experience to new heights. Discover the 2024 Nissan Pathfinder at NissanUSA.com.
Intelligent all-wheel drive cannot prevent collisions or provide enhanced traction in all conditions. Always monitor traffic and weather conditions. Touring capacity varies by configuration. See Nissan Touring Guide and Owner's Manual for additional information. Always secure cargo. Most deals are barely worth mentioning.
But then there's AT&T's best deal on the new Samsung Galaxy Z Flip 6. You can get it on them when you trade in your eligible smartphone. Any year, any condition. It's a deal so good, you'll be shouting from the rooftops. So grab a ladder and learn how to get that new phone on AT&T.
AT&T. Connecting changes everything. Requires trading of Galaxy S, Note, or Z series smartphone. Limited time offer. 256 gigabytes for $0. Additional fees, terms, and restrictions apply. See att.com slash Samsung or visit an AT&T store for details.