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Hello and welcome to the Claim Your Power podcast, the ultimate show for all things self-love, spirituality, and personal growth. I'm your host, Kim Peretz. I'm a three-time author, content creator, avid traveler, entrepreneur, and matcha enthusiast. You are at the right place if you're ready to rediscover the love within, align with your purpose, and unleash your highest potential. It's time to claim your power.
Hello, my beautiful friends, and welcome back to the podcast. If you're new here, welcome, welcome to Claim Your Power. I am excited to dive into today's topic because honestly, like the reason I'm filming this now in January, I was thinking of filming it back in December, but I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that.
But then I had this realization that I need to do it in January because this is a fresh new year. It's fresh starts. It's fresh energy. And I want you guys to take this mindset and take this mentality into the new year so that no matter what experiences you have, situations or triggers that come your way, you know how to respond differently this time.
And this is why today we are talking about the long-awaited concept of why no revenge is the best revenge of all. So I'm sure you've all been in a situation where someone in your life did something wrong towards you. They made a mistake or they cheated on you or you trusted them and they broke that trust or they did you dirty, whatever it is, a friend or romantic partner, an acquaintance, whoever it is that you're thinking of.
I want you to first, let's start off this episode by you thinking about the situation and this person because I think when you have this idea and this person in mind, throughout this episode, you can kind of do the inner work along with me and you can have these realizations along with me so that by the end of this episode, you will be responding and in a different type of energy towards this situation.
And so whatever it is, whatever situation or person that you're thinking about, I'm sure you've gone through your head of all the processes and all the emotions and all the triggers and also a small part of you or a big part of you might have wanted revenge.
So that means might have wanted to, you know, make them feel the same way that you felt. But let me tell you guys that the best, the best form of revenge is truly moving on with your life, having your peace, having your joy, claiming your power, and
and moving the fuck on. No matter if it's a friend or a romantic person that you're thinking of, the best revenge is genuinely getting yourself to a place of neutrality, a place where you're detached and you've moved on. Because this desire to avenge whatever you went through, to get revenge, that's low frequency. Do you know how crazy people get when they realize that you are in a different place?
Do not give them the power and satisfaction of knowing that what they did to you and how they treated you and how they wronged you has power over you. That is not revenge. The way you truly get revenge is by claiming back your power. It's by genuinely not caring about revenge and just caring about your happiness and your joy and your peace and putting that first.
people go crazy when they realize that they don't have any of your power people go crazy when they realize that your attention is not something they have anymore that you no matter how much they try to hurt you or inflict pain on you when you realize that the only person who can give them that power over you is you you'll also realize that the best form of revenge is just moving on with your life now this is a lot easier said than done but i want to give you guys a really good example
So a couple years ago, I was in like a situationship, whatever you want to call it, with this guy. And he really wronged me. He did me dirty. I was in a place of very low self-worth, very different than the Kimmy that I am today. And he did me very wrong. And so I, being the naive and inexperienced girl that I was, I sent him like this whole paragraph being like,
Like, oh my God, like how dare you, da da da, you're going to regret your life, blah, blah, blah. And just like this like whole paragraph of me saying all my feelings and trying to get revenge on him by realizing and telling him how much I'm worth and what my value is and da da da. And he just didn't respond to that.
And I remember for like a couple of months, I felt so bad about myself. And I just felt like, oh my God, this man ghosted me. And so I must be the problem. There must be something wrong with me. And I gave him so much of my power. And I walked around thinking, okay, if only I could prove my worth to him, maybe he would realize that he fucked up.
And you know what I would tell this past version of myself, this young version of myself, is that if someone chose willingly to walk out of my life, hold the motherfucking door open for them. Okay, Kim, open the door, unlock it and hold it open for them and close it off after.
And if I could tell that past version of me something, I would tell her that the best way to actually get revenge, in quotation, on the situation of someone mistreating me is just detaching and moving on. Because...
I swear on my life that if I did that three years ago, that guy would have come back to me and apologizing. But because I picked it and I picked it and I picked it and you guys know that when you keep picking a scab, it can never heal. It leaves a scar. So I picked it and I picked it and I picked it. And so I never really claimed my energy. I never really claimed my power. And I just let the situation walk all over me and stomp over how I feel about myself.
And so obviously maybe your situation is not about ghosting. There's so much, there's deeper ones and there's more mundane situations. But what I'm trying to say is
Do not try to get revenge on people who have hurt you in your life because that is a waste of energy that will eventually come back to you. And you know what? It's actually really draining to try to prove your worth and prove your value and get revenge on people because that is low, low energy. The best way to put your energy and move on with your life is
is to genuinely focus on building and evolving so hard in your life that they have to get to know you again. Like that is my mentality for 2024, is that if somebody mistreats me, if somebody is not a good or loyal friend to me or a loyal partner, whatever it is, of course there's dialogue, there's communication depending on the dynamic of the friendship or relationship. But if someone does something and crosses a red line for me,
I'm not going to beg them to stay in my life. I'm not going to try and get revenge. I'm just going to move on and keep elevating my life so that they no longer have access to me.
The best revenge is rising so high that anyone who tried to take you down can't even reach you. And so get out of this mentality of, oh my God, I have to make them jealous. Oh, I have to make them realize what they lost. I have to make this friend realize that she fucked up. Or like, you know, like all of these mentalities are such low energy and lack mentality that you could be doing something so much more productive and sustainable and amazing with your time and energy. And that is to elevate your life.
So through any breakup in your life, whether that be a breakup with a friend or a romantic partner or just even a breakup with an old version of yourself, that leads to a breakthrough. And so instead of trying to put all your energy of like, oh my God, I need to get revenge on people, put your energy on elevating your life so hard that you don't even care about what they did to you because you forgive and you move on.
That's the thing is forgiveness is incredibly crucial and this is something that I'm learning about myself too as I go is learning to forgive other people while also upholding my boundaries in a way. So it's like when I forgive someone in my life that wronged me in the past, I'm not letting them back into my life again.
I'm not opening the doors for them to have access to my energy. I'm simply forgiving them in my head and in my heart so that I can have peace, so that I no longer walk around with resentment or anger or a desire for revenge and I can walk around with inner peace in my heart and
And so the whole idea is you learn the lesson, you extract the lesson from the situation and you move forward and you skyrocket. And that is the mindset for 2024 because nothing affects you unless you choose to be affected. Let me say that again. Nothing affects you unless you choose to be affected.
If you let every single little thing in your life affect you, affect your worth, affect your value, affect the way you feel about yourself, you are no longer living a life that is your own. You are living a life for others. And that is why the best revenge in life is genuinely picking yourself up when you're down, moving on, moving forward, detaching yourself from the past and focusing on all the blessings and the good that the universe has in store for you in the near future.
And I know that this is a lot easier said than done, but once you get yourself to this place of, okay, my peace is priority and making myself and my joy happiest priority. And so I'm not going to focus on the people of my past. I'm going to put my energy on creating an amazing present for myself.
Do you know how crazy like as just an after effect that drives the people who have wronged you when they realize that they no longer have power over you? That drives people whack. That drives people off the rails because they don't even know what to do with themselves. Because no matter what they do, it's like a fly on the wall. You're just focused on you. You're elevated. You're radiating. You're growing. And let me tell you guys that that is your revenge.
You will feel it. People will come back into your life once you have detached and once you have moved on. People will come back and apologize. People will come back and try to get your attention again, try to trigger you in all these different ways and all these different tests. But you will not fall for it because you learn the lesson, you extract the lesson, and you move the fuck on. You move forward. The only path in life is forward. You don't see people walking around on the street backwards.
because it's not true it's unnatural you walk forward and so when somebody wrongs you the best form of revenge you can ever ever give yourself in those moments is put your energy back on yourself and back on your growth
Hello, my friends. I just wanted to pop on mid-episode and remind you that the long-awaited Podcast Mastery, my exclusive masterclass that teaches you how to launch, grow, and scale a successful podcast from scratch, is officially out, and you can get your hands on it right now.
and learn all of my tips, all of my tricks, all of my secret strategies to how I took Claim Your Power, a podcast that I started in my childhood bedroom from scratch to the podcast charts on Spotify to over 1 million downloads and to impacting thousands of women around the world to claim their power too. So if you have a dream to start a podcast, this masterclass is for you.
Say yes to yourself. Take that leap. And in 2024, it could be the year that you completely elevate your life, your podcasting game, and change your reality for the better. So if you want to get access to the masterclass, I'll link it in the episode notes and I will see you inside. Something that you have to realize is that in life, people will either rise with you or they will fall off.
And so if you keep yourself stagnant, you keep yourself stuck in the same loop, in the same cycle, and you give other people in your life all of their power over you, they won.
They won. And that is why when I tell you guys that revenge, the best form of revenge is just moving on with your life and letting karma and the universe do its thing. Because what goes around comes around. And it is not your responsibility to teach people your value. It is not your responsibility to show people what they lost. It is not your responsibility to educate people on
or to teach them how to be better people. That is the universe's job. And trust me that the universe never misses an address because energy cannot be created nor destroyed. But you want to keep your energy clean. And the way that you keep your energy and your karma clean is by focusing on you, on your light, on your growth, and not letting anyone else stand in the way of that. Like, for instance, I'm in a phase in my life, genuinely,
That when somebody wrongs me and I feel hurt and I feel triggered, first of all, I give myself space to feel and grieve that. And then I will do self-reflection and I will ask myself, why did I attract the situation into my life?
How did I co-create this? How did I allow and call this in subconsciously into my life? And what can I learn from this? What can I extract from this and take from this so that I no longer repeat this pattern that doesn't make me feel good? Or I no longer attract these types of people or these types of situations. And once I find that lesson,
I integrate it and I move on. I move on with my energy. I move on with my peace. I move on with my self-love and I remind myself that what I put out is what I get back. So if I put out energy of resentment and anger and revenge, that's the energy that's going to come back to me.
But I want to put out an energy of joy, of love, of receiving, of being open. And so I'm going to put that energy out into the universe and that's going to repel any other frequencies that aren't aligned with that anymore.
And so this goes back to this idea that the best form of self-love and the greatest gift you can give yourself is realizing that it is your responsibility to heal you and to help yourself move on. You might not be responsible for the wound, but you are responsible for your healing. And when you realize this, you stop living your life in victimhood and you stop living your life in this endless cycle of misery. Revenge rottens your soul.
And the only person that will be happy about revenge is your ego.
Do not make your ego happy. Restore yourself. Heal yourself. The best revenge is no revenge. Heal. Move on. Be happy. Do not have this need for revenge because other people's actions are going to come back to them. That's just how energy works and that will be punishment enough. But if you start seeking revenge on them, that energy is also going to come back to you. The best revenge is to quietly heal yourself
until you emerge from your cocoon with no desire to prove yourself to others around you. The best revenge is no revenge. It's just about detaching and forgetting about what happened and moving on with your life. The best revenge is not to create drama. It's to create peace.
Because living well, living in your happiness, living in your joy, living in your greatest love for yourself despite the way people wronged you, despite the way people made you feel, despite moments of chaos or downfall in your life, that is the greatest revenge and that is the greatest gift you can ever give yourself because no one can take that away from you. And something that I realize that I think is like the best formula to understand yourself better is...
In order for you to identify what would be like quote unquote the best revenge for you is you find the opposite feeling of how you feel in the moment that you got hurt or mistreated or whatever the situation was. So for instance, if you got hurt by a guy in your life and in that moment you feel worthless, you feel small, you feel like you have no sense of value.
The best revenge, the way that you realize it is you look at that feeling and you find the opposite of that. So the best revenge would be for you to feel worthy. The best revenge would be for you to feel confident and happy in yourself. The best revenge would be for you to realize your value again. That is the best revenge. Not proving yourself to other people, but finding that energy from within and then radiating it outwards.
Karma exists, guys. Like there is no need for revenge in life. You just sit back and you live your life because those who hurt you will just end up eventually sitting in a banquet of their own consequences because that's their energy. And also let's talk about self-responsibility for a second and say that when you hurt others, when you are insensitive, when you put out bad energy out there, that energy is also going to come back to you.
you we are all human so we all have those moments but I think it's really important to take self responsibility and not think we are like all perfect and realize that like we've all done things that have hurt other people and we have to live with those mistakes and live with that energy that will eventually come back to us and our only way is to just keep improving and keep recovering and keep healing and keep elevating because let me tell you something this is one of my favorite quotes
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. What does this mean? That when you embark on a journey of revenge, you best know you're taking yourself down too. Why? Because that energy is low. It is low. Weak people seek revenge. Strong people forgive.
And move on. And again, when I say forgive, I don't mean that you let that person back into your life. I don't mean that you are validating any of their behavior or action. When you forgive someone, you forgive yourself. And I won't go too much into the concept of forgiveness because I have a whole podcast episode on it that you guys can listen to if you really feel like you're struggling with forgiving someone in your life. But guys, like seeking no revenge is not weak. That is for the strong. That takes a lot of courage and strength.
and tenacity to say, okay, even though my ego wants to get revenge, even though my ego wants to prove itself, I'm going to sit back knowing that I'm worthy, that I'm lovable, that I am amazing.
that I am worthy of all the good things life has to offer no matter what other people think, no matter how other people treat me because you are not responsible for other people's actions or words. At the end of the day, the universe knows the beauty of your heart. The universe knows your energy and knows your light and it knows the amazing person that you are. And if you choose to let your triggers or your bad moments, if you choose to let your struggles be stepping stones to your growth,
You will be opening doors to so many gifts. And I truly believe that right before the universe is about to bless you with something amazing in your life, you will be experiencing the mere opposite. You will be experiencing triggers and pain and lack and struggles and you will want to give up and that is a test. And when I say test, I don't mean like pass or fail, but just like an opportunity for growth from the universe of can you respond differently?
Can you remember that no matter what happens in the outside world, as long as you are internally aligned, then what you desire will come to you at the right time? Can you remember that even though things are happening and are crazy around you, you stick to your vision and you stick to your heart and you know that the universe will deliver? Do not get mad. Do not get even. Be better. Grow stronger.
empower yourself and become so engulfed and empowered in your own success and in your own peace and in your own happiness that you forget what even happened with that person or with that situation.
Imagine. Imagine if this is the year that you get yourself to that place of like, I'm no longer going to mope around and be a victim. I'm no longer going to constantly complain. Imagine if you get yourself to this place of, okay, I'm going to choose to move on. I'm going to choose to level up because you are bigger than revenge. You are bigger than karma. Keep your soul pure. Keep your soul and your spirit in love and keep your happiness on the top. So I'm going to end this episode with a quote.
The wise man said, do not take revenge as the rotten fruits will fall by themselves. Beautiful souls, thank you so much for joining me in today's episode. As always, I will talk to you next week. Bye. Yep, that's who you think it is. The Grimmest Mud. The Hello Kitty keychain. Barbie herself.
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