Eiza Gonzalez — on partying with Sofia Vergara and recovering from teen stardom
51:57 Share

So I'm here in London, knee-deep in rehearsals for Here We Are at the National Theatre, the late, great Stephen Sondheim's final musical. And it's been an incredible experience so far, but between the long days of learning lyrics and blocking scenes, I've come to appreciate a good system that makes everything run smoothly, like Airbnb's co-hosting feature.

Now, if you're a host and you're juggling life like I am right now, a local co-host can handle the details while you focus on your big projects. They can manage guest communication, check-ins, and everything in between. So whether you're hosting while traveling or simply need some help, you can rest easy knowing someone reliable is looking after your place. And the best part? These co-hosts are local pros who know your area inside and out, ensuring your guests have an unforgettable stay, and you can focus on what matters most.

So whether you're looking to host or need a hand while you're away, find a co-host at Airbnb.com slash host.

So

So I gave Huggy's Snug and Dry a try, and honestly, I was shocked. They were unbelievably soft. Like, wait, is this a diaper or a cashmere throw kind of soft? And let's be real, listen, Beckett has standards. If something's even remotely itchy, it's coming off. But these? He didn't even try and tug at them.

Experience the unexpected softness and up to 100% leak protection of Huggies Snug and Dry Diapers. So even if your toddler is running a diaper-only fashion show through your living room, you know they're comfy and covered. More parents choose the new Huggies Snug and Dry Softness versus the leading premium diaper. Huggies, we got you, baby. Hi, it's Jesse. ♪

Today on the show, you know her from the Netflix series Three-Body Problem and more recently starring alongside Aaron Paul in the sci-fi flick Ash and the new Apple TV Plus film Fountain of Youth alongside Natalie Portman and John Krasinski. It's Aza Gonzalez. I come in and I'm like...

This is Dinners on Me, and I'm your host, Jesse Tyler Ferguson.

So I admittedly didn't know too much about Aza Gonzalez until I started researching her for this podcast. But the second I saw her in Three-Body Problem and Ash with my old neighbor, Aaron Paul, no less, I was absolutely hooked. She's got fire, elegance, and this magnetism that makes you think, oh yeah, she was definitely born for this.

But her journey to stardom didn't start with red carpets. It started in a middle school auditorium playing Rizzo in Greece. Yes, that Rizzo. Now, as someone who also got my start in 50s musical theater, okay, mine was Bye Bye Birdie, but still, I felt an instant kinship. Performing was more than just fun for both of us. It was, I don't know, therapy for

Now, after losing her father at the young age of 12, Aza turned to the stage as an emotional outlet. I definitely related to that pivot. For me, theater was where I could be someone else. I could escape my bullies and belt out my feelings under a spotlight or somewhere I felt safe.

For both of us, acting wasn't just a hobby. It was a lifeline. And somewhere between jazz hands and dramatic monologues, Aza found her purpose. What's remarkable is how Aza has turned every challenge, every heartbreak into rocket fuel. I was so excited to sit down and meet this incredible person.

Hi! How are you? I'm good, how are you? I'm so happy to meet you. I brought Aza to Vadir in mid-Wilshire, Los Angeles. Vadir is a dreamy rooftop bar and restaurant perched atop the Kempton Hotel. The menu, curated by Blue Plate Oysterette and Jean-Georges veteran chef Hannon Mattern, features dishes like seared prawns with almond hummus and yellow tomato saffron pasta.

With its linen-draped cabanas, lush tropical foliage, and sweeping views of the L.A. skyline, it's hard not to feel glamorous dining here. And even though L.A. has its fair share of rooftop spots, Vadir stands out with a splash. Literally, it has a pool. There's just something so special about drinking a frosty beverage poolside with a view of the Hollywood sign that just oozes old-school Hollywood charm.

Oh, then again, A's effortless elegance and je ne sais quoi could make a strip mall food court feel like a sophisticated five-star bistro. Okay, let's get to the conversation.

I danced my ass off with Sophia all night. I was going to ask if you were at the Oscars. She will start a dance party. I mean, the girl got me and I was like, Sophia, I got to go. And I'm still like feeling like I'm dying. Yeah, no, she is no joke. And she... She is no joke. She will shut a party down. Yeah, honey. She's like the do-or-sell bunny. I'm like...

Where are you getting all this energy from? Exactly. No, every time I've been out with her, I've like excused myself early. I'd be like, I got to go to bed. And she's just always been that way. You have to Irish goodbye with her. Absolutely. I've discovered that the trick is Irish goodbye. Yeah, you can't let her know you're leaving because she will pull you back in. It's like the whole posse too. It's like all like... She rolls in with the entire family. I remember one year at the Golden Globes.

No, was it the Golden Globes or the Emmys? I don't know. One of the shows, she needed a sprinter van for the entire family. Of course you did. And she also expected, because, you know, those events, they don't give you just unlimited tickets. Yeah. You can get, like, a ticket, and then if you want anything more...

One, maybe. Maybe. And then if you want anything more, it's like you have to buy the tickets and they're pretty expensive and they're usually like way in the back. Yeah, yeah. She bought out like seven rows of the Dolby Center for her family when she was nominated for Griselda recently. She did, that's right. Yeah. Because I was there. Yeah, yeah. It's so funny. I was like, I mean, I saw the whole posse there. Yeah, yeah. That's where I saw them all. I was like. Yeah, it's so great. And like I met them all when I first, so on her 40th birthday, I was like,

She flew us all to Mexico. We went to Playa del Carmen and we all just like took over the Rosewood and partied for a whole week. How were you after that? Oh, decimated. Yeah, that sounds like a week and a half of like recovery. Oh, yeah. We had like tequila tastings every night. In fact, she had like her own tequila with her face on like the bottle. She had like a branded tequila. And her name. I love her.

But I met most of her family on that trip. I met like her ex-husband. I met all her cousins. I met everyone. I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. And it was like, I was like, okay, I've truly been initiated into like the Sofia Vergara family. Now you're like Colombian by like proxy. She's so nice, isn't she? I love her. I do love her. How have you known her?

So I've known her for a very long time because, you know, I started soap operas and then like she was in, we were all like in the Univision school. So I've known her directly and directly for very, very long. But I'm very close to Alejandro, who's very close. Her manager.

And I love her son, Manolo, so much. She's always been nice to me. Since I started especially working in the U.S., she's always so nice and so warm, and she's always been kind to me. I love her. Yeah, she was one of the first people I met on Modern Family, and she gave everyone these big hugs like she'd known us for years. And she was just so Latin. So Latin. So Latin. We're like, yeah.

Yeah, I know, I know, I know. And then you see us at parties and we're crazy. I mean, a friend of mine was watching us from afar and he's like, watching you two is hilarious because we're just like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

She loves when she has a good friend who can speak her language with her because, you know, she would always say, my language is getting worse and worse and worse every year I'm here. It really is. I was like, how is it getting worse? I don't know what's getting worse, her English or her Spanish. She's like, I don't care. I love hanging out with her. I know. I know, me too. I miss her so much. I just actually called her not too long ago because I was walking to the airport and I saw like she was hanging out with some...

young person. Of course. I know a lot about her love life. Like, I set her up with her now ex-husband. So, like, I, you know, I feel very invested in her love life. Oh, yeah, you're like, what's next? Yeah, so I was like, why am I finding out about this from a, first of all, why am I my mother, like, believing everything in a tabloid? Yeah, yo, exactly. Hello. I was like, I should know better. You should know better. But I was like, who is this? So I called her. I was like, tell me all this. And she's like, hi.

She's like, whatever. It's just a friend. Exactly, yeah. It's so funny when these things come out on tablets. You know what happened to me recently? I was going into the salon and I'm walking in and I'm in my car and I'm jumping off my car and in my car is my mom and my brother. And my brother's walking out and you know like typical, my brother's like,

13 years older than me. Uh-huh. And in like old, good old brother fashion, I'm like, I just go, hey, listen, I can see that we're being tailed. Like, just be careful. Yeah. He's like, oh, that's annoying. We're like,

jumping off the car. He jumps off the car to give me something. And typical brother, I had like a hair and he's like, you have a hair? And he's like touching my face, like pulling my face. I'm like, Yulen, they're taking photos of us. Next thing you know, they're like mystery man. Mystery man. My brother. Mystery man touching, and a day today is that my brother. That's so gross. And by the way, people would realize

would read it and believe it. That's so funny. It's just the typical story of like these things happen all the time but yeah. Anyway, he's like the coolest brother on earth. We were at

At the Oscar pre-party. And he was super cool, calm, and collected with everyone. And I've been to that party. It's overwhelming. It's overwhelming, for sure. Even I still sometimes am like, this is so surreal. I'm talking to whatever. And he didn't ask me for photos for anyone, but there was two people that freaked out. It was Mick Jagger. Oh, that's a good one. He saw Mick Jagger. I would be freaked out by that one, too. He's freaking out. He's like...

oh my god it's Mick Jagger and Mick Jagger said hello and like spoke to him and he couldn't believe it and then oh my god thank you very much thank you are we gonna order something yeah oh my goodness what are you gonna have I'm pretty hungry french toast I think I'm gonna get the avocado toast that's good yeah I'll get the avocado toast absolutely yes so I'm gonna do the oatmeal can I have a side of bacon yeah me too thank you oh my god oatmeal with bacon right what am I thinking I'm out of control now and

And I'll do a coffee as well. Absolutely. I'll do a nice latte with oat milk, please. Ooh, that's what I want. I want the same thing. Yeah, switch it up. Please, thanks. Thank you. Okay, so Mick Jagger. Oh, so Mick Jagger and then Lars, the drummer for Metallica. Oh, interesting. So he's a music guy. He's a music, he's a boy, you know, he's a boy. And he was like, he had like a couple of tequilas in and he's like, fuck it. And he went rogue. He went rogue. He didn't even ask me. He's like, Lars, can I'm like,

I iron him and he's like, and Lars is so nice about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I also freak out around musicians. Me too. That's the one. Me too. And I think it's just because I'm so far removed from that world. Yeah. They just seem like otherworldly to me. Like, I feel like... Yes. Actors, I don't know. I know what we do is like a skill and not everyone can do it. And I, you know, there are bad actors. No, but I know what you mean. But singing? Yes. Like, that's a whole other level. And it's also not even just singing. Being on stage. Yeah. Like, in that...

fashion. I started singing when I was young and I developed... I actually don't think people know this. I developed crippling stage fright. But like crippling. I think because I was so overworked and so tired. And you know, when you're doing soap operas, as you've probably heard from Sophia, it's like...

16, 17 hours a day. You're doing a thousand scenes a day. - Yeah, you're learning your lines extremely clear. - Extremely quick, and you're like jumping from one take to the other. It's like very, very grueling. And then when I started, I started like in a soap opera that I was touring, and I was so tired. So it was crippling because I always felt like I was losing my voice. Like the way that I realized that I'm getting tired is my voice starts going like deeper and deeper and deeper, and then it just disappears. And I was losing my voice so often.

that I started developing such fear because I couldn't control it. I couldn't do anything about it. I couldn't sing. But you were okay in front of a camera. Like, you didn't have performance anxiety in front of the camera. But it's just, like, the fear of feeling like you can't do something in a stage with 25,000 people. Live, yeah. That is...

I have nightmares about it. So when I watch people do it and own it in such an incredible way, like I went to see Taylor Swift in London. I couldn't, I mean, I couldn't believe it. I see them like so otherworldly. Yeah. For sure. Like Adele.

Oh. Like when I met Adele, I couldn't believe it. And she's so fun. She's so funny. She's so down to earth. She's like my number one. Yeah, me too. I met her at Aaron Paul's house because do you know Aaron Paul? Yes, very well. When he does like these like live concert situations that it's,

one of my favorite activities. - I know Adele's really close with Aaron. - And Aaron and then his wife. - Yes. - And I met her there and I mean, I guess, again, you would think that she's like bombacious and fun and like super, but she is really funny and watching, she's my favorite show live I've ever seen. - You know, so I have a little Adele story. I met Adele at Chrissy Teigen and John Legend's Super Bowl party. - Oh, fun. - And I walked into the party and I thought, oh my God, I told my husband Justin, I was like,

"I don't know if I can be here. "This is too overwhelming." - I'm freaking out. - I'm freaking out right now. He's like, "You have to go say hi to her." I was like, "I know, I know, just please give me a second." He was really pressuring me, like, "Go say hi to Adele." So anyway, I casually walk over to her and she's like, "Hi, I'm Adele." I was like, "Yes, I know." And I was like, "Okay, I'm just gonna get something "off my chest and then we can be just friends "and I'll be normal around you again."

And I just basically was effusive. And I was like, I love you so much. And your music meant so much to me. And I used your accent in a one-man show I had to do where I had to play someone British. I was like, I'm going to steal from Adele. She's like, this is hilarious. Anyway, I ended up chilling out after a while and just being able to communicate with her. Like a normal person. A normal person. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But she and my husband actually really connected because they're the same age. And they were talking about Spice Girls. Oh, I love that. And they were really connecting.

She ends up asking my husband for his number. She's like, good number. I want more friends. So they end up connecting. And so partly I've kind of just like, well, I want her to ask me for my number. But like, I was like, yeah, yeah, Justin, put us on a chain together. So anyway, we all get on a text chain together. I end up inviting her over to our house for dinner.

She comes over. Like that. You're like that with Adele. I was like, she's like, we should have dinner. And I said, yes, do you want us to find a restaurant? She said, do you mind if I just come over to your house for dinner? I cook. I was like, sure, I'll make you dinner. So she comes over. We make dinner. My house at that time is on the street in Los Feliz.

She's just so lovely. And so down to earth. We ended up watching RuPaul's Drag Race that night. And just chilling. It's just dynamic and fun. I find that everyone that I've met that I sort of geeked out over are...

the most laid back, fun, when people are like, say stories about them, they're like this, like, oh my God, she loves like, the housewives and is just like a most normal person ever. But I think that that's tied to being a musician, right? Because you have to be, I guess actors are way more insecure than a musician could ever be because what we do, I guess it's like hiding, a lot of hiding behind things or pretending to be something else. Whereas,

or being a musician, you just have to be, you have to be so comfortable in owning your space, being yourself. But that's why I think we admire them so much. Now for a quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Aza gets into how the trauma of childhood stardom molded her into who she is today and the unexpected way she became a breakout success in Hollywood. Okay, be right back. All right, let's talk about something near and dear to my heart.

Building the perfect sandwich. And yes, yes, I take this very seriously. Step one, you need a great bread. Fresh, crusty, something with character. Step two, Boar's Head Oven Gold Turkey. Always. It's juicy. It's flavorful. It's the backbone of this operation. Step three, a few slices of Boar's Head Smoke Master Ham because I like to mix it up.

It adds a slow-smoked beechwood flavor that makes your taste buds just, you know, do a little dance. Step four, cheese. Sharp cheddar if I'm feeling bold, creamy Swiss if I'm feeling fancy. Step five, a swipe of Dijon, crisp lettuce, thin sliced tomato, and maybe a pickle or two, you know, for drama.

Layer it all up, cut it in half diagonally, obviously, and you got a sandwich that's perfectly crafted thanks to Boar's Head. Every bite tastes like it was made with care because it was. So if you're ready to level up your sandwich game, trust me, start at the deli counter. Discover the craftsmanship behind every bite at your local Boar's Head deli counter. Boar's Head, committed to craft since 1905.

You know, Dinners on Me is all about gathering around a table, good food, great company, and, you know, feeling at home. But let's be honest, it's hard to really relax when you don't feel safe in your own space. And that's why I love Simply Safe. It's the kind of peace of mind that lets you focus on what matters, whether it's catching up over pasta with a friend or just enjoying a quiet night in.

I've been using SimpliSafe for a while now, and it really has changed the way I think about home security. Here's the thing. Most systems kick in after a break-in, but SimpliSafe's new ActiveGuard outdoor protection actually helps stop crime before it happens.

Their AI-powered cameras and live monitoring agents detect suspicious activity, and if someone is lurking around, they'll speak to them in real time, shine spotlights, and they can even call the police. I mean, how proactive is that? No contracts, no hidden fees, just real protection. It's no wonder CNET named SimpliSafe the best home security system of 2025.

So if you want to protect your home while you focus on what makes it feel like a home, you know, family, friends, or the perfect roast chicken, SimpliSafe has you covered. Visit simplisafe.com slash jessie to claim 50% off a new system with professional monitoring plan and get your first month free. That's simplisafe.com slash jessie. S-I-M-P-L-I-S-A-F-E dot com slash jessie.

There's no safe like SimpliSafe. And we're back with more Dinners on Me.

Yeah, I mean, it's interesting, though, because you come from a music background as well. You have two albums, and you're basically the equivalent of Miley Cyrus here. You were on television. You were on a show. Yeah, Nickelodeon. Nickelodeon. You were singing. You had a very successful music career. It wasn't that successful, I've got to say. It wasn't? You don't think it was? No, it was not really successful. But it was—it's funny, because when you're part of these shows, right? Mm-hmm.

You're a product. You're not really yourself. Like, what Miley's achieved is, like, she's a real musician. Like, she went... And she loved it. You know, she went from being the biggest pop star from Disney to actually, like... I think she's so talented. Like, she's a real artist. And I think that, for me, I wasn't that. And not because...

I didn't, because I can sing and I can really do it. I think it was a combination of things. I had a real accident when I was 11, broke my nose in five pieces. And I really had like, I would end up in the hospital with sinus infection every other day, pneumonia, bronchitis. I was always paying catch up with my health.

And it was a gnarly experience because I never felt like I was under control of my instrument. And I just never felt like I could really own myself. Therefore, I didn't think that my career was like

the way that it should have had. And I was okay with it too. I didn't really care because I was a product of a company where they were like, okay, the girl can act and also can sing. So let's like make it a double thing. But I do think that eventually some people realize, oh no, this is more my thing than others. And it's okay to actually kind of go back and forth. And so that was sort of my experience, but it was really jarring to be

so young and being in all these shows and touring and the pressure of being a role model too was really challenging for me as a child. - For sure, so when you're asked to be a role model and you're still looking for role models yourself, it's like, whoa, so, so intense.

I've read that you've talked a lot about insecurity and feeling like an outsider when you're younger, which is, of course, something I really relate to. Do you think a lot of this was maybe stemmed from, you know, being a product of something and sort of not always feeling like you were maybe fully comfortable in these molds that you were being put into? Yeah.

Definitely. You know, I was watching, I don't know if you saw Millie Bobby Brown. She posted about how she's been being heavily bullied by the press in this press tour and the sort of, um...

accepting her from just transitioning into becoming a woman. Like, she's just becoming, she's not 11 anymore. She is this beautiful, married, she's a wife. And so I really identified with what she was saying because she was reading this, she was explaining about her terrifying, oh my goodness, this looks amazing. And I just found that really interesting because- What did she say that resonated with you? So she was reading this,

She was talking about being a grown woman and sort of finding the way she wants to dress and act and be. And she doesn't have to do it under other people's terms. It's under her terms. And she went on and, like, reading the title of these headlines where she goes, you know, whatever, a horrible, horrible headline. And then she'd be, like, written by. And there was, like, the name of, like, a woman and a woman and a woman and a woman. And it really made me...

because I, and I spoke about this recently, about like when I was like a teenager, you know, I broke into the industry. My dad had just passed away in a really tragic accident. And I was really in a deep depression. You were young, right? I was 12. And I was like, you know, you're going into becoming a teenager. So you're like ridden with hormones and you're just angsty. I mean, we have all been that age where you're like ridden with anxiety and

All of you, we know. And on top of it, I'm mourning and I'm grieving very, very, very terribly. It was like a really terrible accident that he passed. And so it was like really sudden, really shocking, very jarring. So now I'm like a kid who's like going to therapy and being forced into therapy. I don't want to talk about my feelings. I'm really struggling with my identity. And then I found...

glitz of happiness in acting. And my mom sort of started guiding me towards it in a way to keep me busy, just to have extracurricular things to mentally occupy me. And so that's how it started for me. And then I was lucky and so grateful that it happened really quickly. I land my job in the first year and a half of me starting to enjoy into acting. And so

it was an overnight thing. I was thrown into this remake of a TV show that was so famous at the time around the world. It was like a Cinderella type of story called Floricienta and it was a remake of it in Mexico. And I was just not ready. I was like, you know, like any normal girl, like growing into my body. I was like chubby. I was like a normal 13, like 14 year old. Right. And so I had no idea what was going on and it was so jarring. And I remember

the first few things coming out about me, you know, I'm just like innocent and that's sort of what makes me really sad and watching her speaking about it. I can see that like some of the innocence has been robbed from her. And I remember like I did like a

They were waiting for the reveal of this character and I came on stage and I sang a song, whatever. And so the next morning, you know, as any child, like I'm 14, I'm watching like the version of Today Show in Mexico and they're going to talk about it. And I'm like sitting there just like I've watched the show my entire life and I'm just 14 and I'm watching and I'm like, oh my God, it's happening. This is crazy. Like I'm doing what I want to do.

And the presenters came on and they're like 40 and 50 year olds. And they're like, she's so ugly. She's so. Oh my God. Yeah. Yeah. She's so fat. Oh my God. She's, they could have gotten anyone. Like, why would they get her? And I remember even right now, I'm just like saying it. It was just like so jarring. And I was just like sitting there like embarrassed, like embarrassed with myself. Like even it makes me tear up. I was just so confused. I'm like,

14 years old, like it's just such a hit to the electricity of your brain. And I remember just going to my room and just like pretending like I hadn't seen it. And then it just all started and it just, it was the beginning of it all. And it was just like never ending. So now you become this child where you're chasing approval.

And now you're like completely lost of identity. And you're also completely lost because you're mourning and you're grieving. So you're sad. And then I'm touring and having to smile and be a role model and pretend like I'm okay when everyone's bombarding you and being like what you're supposed to do, what you're not supposed to do. Mm-hmm.

But I feel really very, very grateful that I had an amazing mother that was like there for me the entire way through. And she was like a mother. She wasn't a stage mom. She was a mother and made me feel safe in being myself. But I definitely got lost. I was very unkind to myself, my body, my thoughts, my soul, everything.

because I just never felt good enough. And it's something that stays with you forever because it sort of, it brands you, it marks you for life. And so it becomes a catch up, right? Yeah. Yeah. Those formative years. I mean, uh,

So much happens. And I think when trauma happens in those years, it does form scar tissue that's impossible to get rid of. And it's just a matter of how do you then live with that and know that you have that and let that be a part of your story. Yes. And let that be a part of what makes you stronger. And feel safe in being vulnerable, too. Like, feel safe that it's okay to have that scar tissue. It's okay to, like...

feel sometimes you weren't the best. And it all ties back to you asking me about being a singer because I did quit because I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't take the pressure anymore. And I loved it. And it made me really sad throughout the years because I genuinely

think that if I would have kept it going, I could have gotten really good at it. And I just gave up. And I'm not a quitter. I'm not. I'm a fighter. And so for me to, like, accept that I quit and the one of the most important things that I could have done with my career really hurts me. But I try to be, like, kind of myself and be like,

whatever. It's also something that you always have that gift and you always have that ability. And like, I feel like it's just an extension of like so many things you can do. I mean, I remember when like Catherine Zeta-Jones, you know, was given the opportunity to do Chicago and like she had done musical theater in the West end, but like no one knew that she was same with Ariana Grande. Like,

She's a musical theater kid. And everyone's like blown away by her comedy chops and that she can act. I'm like, yeah, that's what she does. She started like that, guys. Then she did this other thing and she's this incredible singer. She's known for her incredible range and her unbelievable pipes in her songwriting. But at the root of it, her first passion is being on stage. She's a theater nerd. And that's what she started doing. And so, you know, it's just an extension of, I think...

so many other things that you can do. I think it's great that you have that ability and you have that stage presence and you have that experience of being a songwriter and a singer. You're going to have a very full career because of that. And I always kind of like to share this because I want always to use it as motivation for people to feel like you can still do it. You know what I mean? Yeah.

By the way, this is so good. It has like a bit of like Indian flavor to it. Oh, really? Yes. Like a little curry or something? Yeah, it's like curry-ish in it. It's fucking good. It has flowers in it too. It's pretty. I'm interested in also hearing about your transition, you know, from being super famous in Mexico to, you know, success here in the States. What was your first thing here that...

happened in the States that you feel like people sort of perked up and recognized you for? So, I had this situation happen to me where, like, a boyfriend cheated on me with a sex tape. Yeah. And so, I was so traumatized and it was so aggressive and I was so jarred by it. I was, like, in the deepest depression of my life. I was sobbing every other day. And so, I couldn't be in Mexico anymore. It was getting really harsh for me at that time. I was, like, 24.

Three. And it goes back to sort of what I was talking about earlier. They were just not okay with me growing up. The press was just really not okay with it. There was always a way to take a turn for negativity. I was just really angry. I was just feeling really like just fed up with it. And I just got to a place where I was like, I'm done. I just can't, I can't like face this.

And I sort of came to LA to kind of hide. And yeah, I just was like going out and drinking and partying and drinking and partying and drinking and partying. And I just wanted to like shut down completely. And my mom was like, because my mom managed me forever. She was like, I think you should try it while you're there to like audition. I was like, mom, that's not how it works. Like you have to have a team. You were really just here to like disappear. Disappear.

Now for a quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Aza tells me about unknowingly auditioning for one of Hollywood's biggest movies, working alongside longtime friend Aaron Paul, and adapting to Guy Ritchie's unconventional, off-the-cuff directing style. Okay, be right back.

Some of my favorite episodes of Dinners on Me are episodes that happen over a good glass of wine. Patricia Clarkson, Keri Russell, Margo Martindale, they gave me some of the best stories I have ever heard over a glass of wine. They definitely opened up. I mean, maybe it was the food or, you know, maybe it was the wine. I'm just saying.

I always stock up at Total Wine and more. It's my go-to, especially when I'm throwing a little backyard hang. They've got everything. Amazing wines, ice-cold beers, even non-alcoholic wines and mocktail mixers for the friends who, you know, aren't drinking. Honestly, my guests think I have the best taste, but don't tell them that it's actually my friend down the street at Total Wine giving me all the tips.

Their guides are so helpful when I'm picking out the perfect bottles for everyone at the table. With the lowest prices for over 30 years, you'll always find what you love and love what you find only at Total Wine and more. Curbside pickup and delivery available in most areas. See TotalWine.com for details. Spirits not sold in Virginia and North Carolina. Drink responsibly. Be 21.

Hey, podcast listeners, have you heard you can listen to your favorite podcasts ad-free? That's good news. With Amazon Music, you have access to the largest catalog of ad-free top podcasts included with your Prime membership. To start listening, download the Amazon Music app for free or go to amazon.com slash ad-free podcasts. That's amazon.com slash ad-free podcasts to catch up on the latest episodes without the ads.

And we're back with more Dinners on Me. What were you doing for work? I just finished my last soap opera, that show that I was telling you about where I was playing this girl. And I just didn't know who I wanted to be. I was like 23, 24. I felt a lot of pressure to get married because in Mexico it was like all my friends by the time they were already kind of married and having kids. And...

I wasn't thinking of transitioning to the U.S. Like, the last thing was, oh, I want to go to Hollywood. Right. Like, that was not even a train of thought. I was coming often to L.A. because I would record albums here. So it felt like my second home for a while. You knew the city, yeah. So anyway, I'm just here chilling. And eventually, I started doing auditions and I sucked at it. I like...

remember one casting director being so mean to me. I'd never even auditioned in English. Like, I'd never done anything in a foreign language. And so I'm sitting there and I have the sides in my hand because we don't audition like that in Mexico. It's completely different. So I'm like with the sides in the room and she's like,

What are you doing? I'm like, I'm reading the scene. Yeah. Because I think I've watched movies where I'd see like in the movies, like in the scene of the movie. They're holding the pages. They're holding the pages. I didn't know. Yeah. That's what Emma Stone did in La La Land. Exactly. I've seen this over and over again. No one walks you through this process. It's a weird thing too. It's a weird thing. Like I wish more people were like, that's why I love to watch like

inside the actor's studio and hear like actors talk about it because it made me feel like, okay, I'm not so dumb. So anyway, I was like reading the slides and she's like, you, and she said something really mean. She said something like, well, you're always going to work because you're pretty.

It was so... Wow, it's so dismissive. It was like, well, you're obviously... I love a veiled insult. With a compliment. She's like, well, you're obviously going to work if you're pretty, but you should probably figure this out. It was just not kind. And I remember being like, it's never going to happen, and sort of

left really deflated. And so I ended up getting another audition and I went for it. And I like, this time I really was like, okay, I'm going to read these scenes, study them like thoroughly. And I'm reading this scene and

And I'm studying and I'm studying and it's like untitled whatever. And I'm like, okay, I'm going to this untitled whatever audition. I'm like, come into this untitled whatever audition. I don't know what I'm talking about. I do it. So I did this like a couple of times and I'm reading for this untitled thing. And then on like the third or fourth audition, I don't really remember. They're like, you have to sign an NDA. And I'm like, what is this?

I'm like, I've never heard of an NDA either. And so I'm like, okay, I'm doing this NDA. Okay, great. And you're going to meet with the director. So I come in and they're like. You have no idea what this is. I have no idea. I have no idea what I'm auditioning for because I don't even know that you're supposed to, you can ask. Because I don't have an, at this point I have no agency. I don't have an agent, a manager, an assistant. I don't, nothing. A publicist, no idea. Just a mom at home. Just a mom and an IMDb pro page. And an email. And an email. That's it. That's all I have.

Yeah. And so I come in and I'm like, hi, nice to meet you. He's like, hi, nice to meet you. My name is JJ Abrams. I'm auditioning for Star Wars. I have no idea. Oh my God. I've been auditioning for Star Wars this entire time. Wait, what were the sides like? It was for the sky or like the rise awakening. I don't remember. So it felt like it was some sort of sci-fi thing. It was just, it was words.

Because, by the way, I feel very, very guilty. I'd never watched Star Wars before. But you knew who J.J. Abrams was. Yes. When they said J.J. Abrams, I'm like... But I kind of didn't, though. I didn't. I didn't. Like, I knew that it was, like, a Hollywood name. It's crazy Abrams, Dad. Exactly. It's crazy Abrams. I love you. I'm sorry, Dad. And so then I, like...

couldn't believe it and obviously didn't get it, whatever. And they went back to Mexico and I was like, wow, that was a great experience. Like I am back to soap operas. Like I can tell my friends that I auditioned for Star Wars and never got it and moved on with my life. And so I'm in a, I've told this story before, but I'm in a bridal shoot and

And I'm like in a bride's gown and I get a phone call and I pick up and they're like, "Hi, is this Aza Gonzalez?" I'm like, "Yes, hi." She's like, "My name's Mary Vernu. I was wondering if you could audition, I have this audition for you." She's like, "I'm a casting director in LA." I'm like, "Oh!"

"Sure, sure, yeah, is that gonna?" And she's like, "It's really timely, could you audition right now?" And I'm in the middle of a shoot and I'm like-- - You're wearing a bridal gown. - Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, "Yeah, yeah, I could totally do it." She's like, "Are you sure?" I'm like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can send it." It's like, we need it tomorrow. And I had this bridal shoot the entire day.

So my mom had this boyfriend at the time who was like my musician. And so she's like calling him and she's like, bring a camera. We're going to have a lunch break. Run in. So he's like running in with a camera. Oh, my God. I've never done this. He's running into it with a camera. Like my makeup artist gives me her T-shirt. I'm like in this T-shirt. And she's like, just read. I'm like, I'm not going to have time to memorize. She's like, just read the sides. I was like, thank God. And I'm like with the sides on the wall, just like reading. And I have a gown.

I wish I could find the photo. I have a bridal gown on the bottom, like, and then the top, I just have a t-shirt. Party on the bottom, business on the top. Yeah, party on the top, and I'm like reading it, whatever. And then the next day...

They're like, you have to fly in to meet with the director. The director's Robert Rodriguez. You're going to meet him. And I was like, okay. So I come in. I meet with Robert. I do an audition. I do another one. And I book my first show here, which was from Dusk Till Dawn. Right. And I moved to Austin. And I start doing this show. And I'm like, my first ever in English. I'm playing the role that Salma Hayek played forever. And then...

Right after that, the head of Neutrogena at the time was Latina. And so she had wanted to sign me for Clean and Clear years before. So when she found out... I said no to that, by the way. That's why it was available. Thank you. I really appreciate it. You've changed my career. Yes.

You changed my life. And so then she was like, oh, I heard you're transitioning to America, so I'd love to make you the face of Neutrogena in America. So I'm like, great. So then I go into my first... Just have one like that. It's so crazy. When it's meant to be, it's meant to be. I really believe it. You have this bonkers year coming up. I mean, there's so many...

incredible films that you're like gonna be in and I first of all I'm really interested in talking obviously about Ash with our mutual friend Aaron Paul I watched the trailer and like I was like how do I categorize this is it is it space horror is it sci-fi thriller is it all those things I mean it looks insane but

Insane. Yeah. It's such a fun movie. I was so lucky to be able to work with Aaron on that because it was a really demanding movie. Is that where you met him? No, we've been friends forever. Okay. We've been friends for a very long time. And so from being friends, we'd been wanting to do something together. And so when this came about, they were looking for an actor and there was this other actor that had, like, the two original actors had dropped out of the project and they

I was like, they mentioned Aaron, the director mentioned Aaron in the Zoom. And I called Aaron and I said, can you imagine how fun would it be if we were together in this movie in New Zealand with your kids and your wife? And we'd like just hang out every day. Like, this is a dream. And he was like, he said, listen, Aza, this is long overdue for you. You deserve a leading role. And I couldn't be more happy to be there for you and be able to provide that for you. And I was just like...

That stayed with me in such a way that I will never forget because he, like, that's a gift. When you're an actor, you're giving it to other people.

And so he did, he came in and it was a really hard job and you need a friend in that job. You need a companion that is gonna be there through it with you in a way that you feel safe. And he was just awesome. I love Aaron, I couldn't be happier. And I'm obsessed with the movie. It's crazy, it's a crazy movie. - Yeah, I mean the trailer looks insane. I can't wait to see it. - Yeah, I'm glad that The Substance did so well this year because it just goes to show that people are open to like fun, off the wall, horror movies.

horror, crazy, new. It feels like a new wave of cinemas coming in again. Yeah. You know, we get those hits once in a while and I'm excited. I feel like this movie falls into that category. Yeah, absolutely. Just like movies are trying to change the genre and make people. Swings. Yeah, big swings. Big swings. This is a big swing. It's a big swing. I love that. Yeah. I love that. Talk to me a little bit about working with Guy Ritchie so much because he's one of my favorite directors. I've never worked with him. I,

Every friend of mine who has worked with him has absolutely loved him. Yeah. I know he has a very collaborative set. A lot of improv is encouraged. Yeah. Which for me, when I hear the word improv, I'm like, terrifying, terrifying. Yes. Terrifying.

But what do you mean? Didn't you do so much for Modern Family? I did. I mean, yeah. What do you mean? I would think you would be like the king of it. And that show you guys were like, comedy is like the hardest thing to do. Comedy is hard. But like the other cast members, specifically Eric Stonestreet, who played my husband. Yeah.

He's a really good improviser. You guys are so good. Thank you. So funny. He's a great improviser, so I would just follow him. But if it was me having to lead that, I'd be like, let's see where this goes. I'm sure you would be able to do it now. I have more confidence with every success, that's for sure. But you have two movies with Guy coming out this year. So I have In the Gray, and I have Fountain of Youth. Yeah. Which is coming out pretty soon. I love Guy. You know, I... Again...

I'm a tough girl. Like, I like straight to the head, tell me what's wrong, and that's nip it in the bud and move forward. And that's how he works. He's very, like...

Yeah, this isn't working. And you have to really be ready for it. Not in a way that it feels like, oh, you're a bully. Let's just be truthful. Let's move on. Let's figure this out. Exactly. In a collaborative way. And so it can be really challenging if you have more of a traditional way of like, you like to learn your scenes like seven weeks before, which that's me. And I used to be like that. And I'm still like that. I think you just adjust to different directors and you start learning different things.

different talents. Like, now I can learn scenes in 10 minutes. And if I have to, I'll figure it out. And that came from working with Guy Ritchie. Yeah.

So if you're going to work with him, you better know that you have to be ready that he'll be like, no, change the entire scene 10 minutes before. See, I thrive with that. See, there you go. You'll be great. I love doing multi-camera sitcoms, which I did for a while. Okay. Because they would change scenes. If you do it in front of a live audience, if the line didn't get a laugh, they would come in and rewrite the whole scene. No way. And they wouldn't even show you pages. They just sort of like...

tell you what they want you to say. You repeat it back to them a few times. And then is this public? That does that. He does that as well? That does that, yeah. And then you do it in front of the audience. And like if you start to go off, they stop you and you have to start again because they don't want the audience to be spoiled. They don't want the audience to hear the wrong blow of the joke or whatever. Wow. So it's a lot of pressure. But it's really exhilarating. And I like, I attribute it to like feeling like, you know,

jumping out of a plane. Yes, yes. You're nailing it. That's the feeling that it feels like to work with Guy Ritchie. He really gets a high from working with actors that are willing to play and open so he'll repeat you. And I really feel very proud of being a type of actress that directors want to work with again. I think it says a lot about actors. And yeah, I would, I mean,

In the gray, when we got in the gray, I didn't even read the script and I said yes. Like, I just will do anything for Guy. Because I know that...

He's always going to try to elevate what you're doing and make you look better and smarter. And I know that what you're getting is going to be something fun. And I love Guy Ritchie movies. They're so fun. Me too. They're so fun. Fountain of Youth is so fun. I can't wait to see it. Fountain of Youth is just your good old throwback. Is this about Natalie Portman? Yes. It's your good old throwback. I'm so jealous. She's the best. I love her so much. I love her. And Krasinski. Yeah. They couldn't be better.

Nicer. Yeah. And Donald Gleeson. The whole cast was just absolutely fun and entertaining. And we got to travel the world together. So we started in Thailand. We then went to Vienna.

Then we went to Egypt. Oh, my God. Then we were in London. So, you know, we're like a traveling band all together around the world in different costumes. And it was so cool. We're like trying restaurants, going places. It just it was the warmest group of people and really sweet. Natalie is just like such an incredible mom as well, which I was like so inspired by that being around her mom.

I wanted to be an actress. I've said this millions of times and I feel embarrassed to say it to her. But I wanted to be an actress because of her. So being able to work with her was shocking. But I think that what blew me away more was the fact that she was...

an incredible mom. She's like an incredible mother. She was there with her kids. She was like going back and forth the entire time to Paris to not miss anything for her kids. She was like producing this entire birthday for her son and his bar mitzvah. And it was just like, wow, you are. That's really inspiring. It's something I love meeting people like that because I'm juggling two kids. Exactly. You know, and like,

like Michelle Williams is the same way. She's an incredible mother. And she told me when she goes, you know, it's important for my kids to see me happy doing the things that I love doing, even if it does take me away from them sometimes, because I want them to know that they should always be putting themselves in a position where they're doing things that make them happy. And, and it's really important for me to, to lead by example. And so hearing her brilliant phrase it in that way really struck with me because I, I, uh,

you know, sometimes I just think of it, it's like, oh, I'm being selfish. I'm going off to do a, to do a job for myself, but really is setting example of like leading with happiness. Yeah. Yeah. And, and, and by the way, everyone on that set was doing that. Like, you know, John was there with Emily. Emily would come to set and their kids and they're incredible parents. Like,

Another person who I didn't know who could be the most hilarious human being is Emily. I guess it makes sense if you're married to John Krasinski. You have to be so, so, so cool. They seem like a really cool couple. They're the coolest couple I've ever met. I genuinely would, Guy and I would say, wow, what a couple. Like, they are a dream together. And it was just so cool to watch because she is a working mother, too, you know? I was just really inspired. And it was a great environment, right?

to be around, and I just really enjoyed that movie. Do you want to be a mother? I'm dying to be a mom. I just have a lot in the process to make it there. I understand. I have to find a suitor. By the way, you don't really nowadays, which is kind of great. No, you don't. You don't. You absolutely do not. But I really am dying to be a mom. I think you'd be an incredible mom. I'm really, really dying to be a mom. I'm dying to...

And especially when I see, as I said, I see these amazing women. I just, I'm ready for that next chapter in my life. I don't know when it happens and will it happen. It'll be a blessing. But I really, yeah. Well, it sounds like you had such a great woman to look up to in your mom. I mean. She's the best. She's with me right now. She's living with me. We're sort of dealing with her health at the moment. And she's been such, even in these times,

tough times. She's, her spirit is so positive and so, so encouraging and such a profound, deep woman with so much knowledge and unspoken too. You know, I feel like I always have to like excuse, express myself and she's just like,

quiet and confident and I just look up to her so much. Everyone's like, "Oh, how hard your life has to be a lot." I said, "It has to be hard for my mother because she's the one sort of gauging the whole thing. She's sort of the architect of the project. She's sort of guiding me through it all because I'm just like sort of guy." And yes, of course, I have an autonomy and a personality, but if you don't have that level of love and parents and kindness surrounding you,

You don't get to do these things. You don't get to have these careers. We see it often, you know? So I'm grateful. And I'm sure there's a lot of empathy there, too. You know, you having grief of losing your father. You know, she also lost her partner and had two kids to take care of. And her parents all in one year. Oh, God bless her. Both her parents, my father, and had to take care of two, you know, grieving children. And she just navigated it. That's a woman with a lot of strength. While being a super...

super highly successful businesswoman running a career

being there for herself. Like that's the school I went to. So I really want to be able to bring that to my children in the future and sort of all these things that sound like tragedies, but they're all like wins to me. I always see that amazing things have come out from tragic situations. You have to be like, oh, there's a terrible downfall. What's the positive in this? What is coming out of this? Even right now, I'm living it very, very vividly.

with my mother and I'm just like, there's something really positive out of this. Like you got to take it out and really focus all on that. Yeah. Yeah. I'm,

So happy to meet you. You're just such a light. You too. Thank you so much. Of course. It's so wonderful to meet you. I cannot wait to see Ash. It looks so great. Oh, I can't wait for you to watch it. And I also, next time we go out, we have to do a dance party too. Oh, for sure. Next time I see you in a dance, I'm going to run to you. Well, now that I know that you roll with Sophia, I'm going to make sure that she puts us in the same room very soon. And maybe next time you can put me on a group chat with Adele as well.

You're your husband and Adele and me. I think she's changed her number. You're like, where are you? Absolutely. Thank you so much. Thank you. This episode of Dinners on Me was recorded at Vadir in Los Angeles, California.

Next week on Dinners on Me, you know him as Manuel Alberto Javier Alejandro Ramirez Delgado. Also known as my stepbrother Manny on Modern Family, it's Rico Rodriguez. We'll reminisce about our time together on the set of Modern Family, and Rico opens up about how the loss of his father shaped his approach to acting.

And if you don't want to wait until next week to listen, you can download that episode right now by subscribing to Dinners On Me Plus. As a subscriber, not only do you get access to new episodes one week early, you'll also be able to listen completely ad-free. Just click Try Free at the top of the Dinners On Me show page on Apple Podcasts to start your free trial today.

I'm Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Join me next week.

All right, let's talk about something near and dear to my heart. Building the perfect sandwich. And yes, yes, I take this very seriously. Step one, you need a great bread. Fresh, crusty, something with character. Step two, Boar's Head Oven Gold Turkey. Always. It's juicy. It's flavorful. It's the backbone of this operation. Step three, a few slices of Boar's Head Smoke Master Ham because I like to mix it up.

It adds a slow-smoked beechwood flavor that makes your taste buds just, you know, do a little dance. Step four, cheese. Sharp cheddar if I'm feeling bold, creamy Swiss if I'm feeling fancy. Step five, a swipe of Dijon, crisp lettuce, thin sliced tomato, and maybe a pickle or two, you know, for drama.

Layer it all up, cut it in half diagonally, obviously, and you got a sandwich that's perfectly crafted thanks to Boar's Head. Every bite tastes like it was made with care because it was. So if you're ready to level up your sandwich game, trust me, start at the deli counter. Discover the craftsmanship behind every bite at your local Boar's Head deli counter. Boar's Head, committed to craft since 1905.