Getting Sober Hasn't Solved My Problems
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You can find Skechers at Skechers.com slash Dr. Laura or Skechers.com. Use the promo code Dr. Laura. Valid for 20% off site-wide. Standard exclusions apply. Valid March 5th through May 30th, 2025. Thanks for listening to my Call of the Day podcast. You can hear my live radio program Monday through Friday from 2 to 5 p.m. Eastern Time on Sirius XM Triumph 111. Shelby, welcome to the program.

Hi. Hi. What can I do for you? So I have, it's kind of a, I have been really struggling with a career decision. I'm 27 and I recently made the decision to get sober. I was a very heavy drinker. I've been sober for almost 80 days. And I went to a rehab facility to do that.

And I was really hoping for some clarity when I got back and when I had some sobriety under my belt with my job and with feeling like this is the right career. And I still don't have that. And I've been thinking about switching careers. But I'm really lost because I've done sales since I got out of college and I have no idea what else to do. But I'm trying to prioritize my sobriety and myself. So I'm just trying to kind of work through that. Yeah.

Okay. Did you, where you were getting treatment? What did they suggest? I went to a rehab. Okay, Shelby, I didn't ask the question yet. Hold on, woman. Okay. Did you ever spend any time with AA in addition? Yes, I've been going to AA meetings since. Okay. And what did they, calm down. You are seriously hyper. Sorry. Calm down.

That's very important, even when you started to speak. I know people get a little nervous, but I think that's probably more of an indication of your style right now. You sedated yourself for a long time. You're only clean and sober for 80 days. That's nice, but not huge in the space of your life. So there are a couple of things to understand. One is all the time you were drinking, you were not maturing. Right. It's makeup time now, and that takes time. Mm-hmm.

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So making decisions now about relationships or work is probably not the best idea. Right now, it's probably good for the security you have and knowing what you're doing and knowing how to do it and being able to support yourself right now. So right now, making decisions, thinking you were going to get out of rehab and suddenly the entire world was going to become clear to you.

This is the time a lot of people start drinking again because they have this expectation that this wonderful clarity is going to happen. And it doesn't. And it's upsetting. And people go back to drink. Yeah. So. Yeah. And I. The first thing. I'm not. First thing. First thing I'm asking you to do is understand that you've got more than a handful of years to catch up on. Right.

You're going to have to be very patient with yourself and cut down your expectations of how marvelous sobriety was going to instantly be. Yeah. I genuinely thought when I came out of this, I guess, that my problems would be gone and that I would want to go to the gym, that I would be clear. And I have the same problem since I got back, and I guess I've just been trying to make

make quick decisions and that's not the way to do it. And so it probably, I didn't even think about it that way that right now I do wake up and at least I know what I'm doing. I know who I'm working with. And that sense of security is probably a good thing for me in early sobriety. Right. Give yourself the time it takes or you're going to mess it up. Right. Yeah. You did a lot of work to get sober. Don't blow it now by overstressing your circuitry. Okay.

Thank you. That's actually really helpful. Good. Call me anytime in this whole progress, in all this transition you're going to make. It's not going to be easy. You're going to need support. And that's why I hope you continue to go to AA. Because everybody, just about everybody in there knows what this phase is like. And it can be brutal. Yeah. Yeah. Not easy. No. Takes a lot of guts, which you clearly have. So let's just be a little more understanding about yourself.

and toward yourself. Thank you so much. Thank you, Dr. Lyle. All right. I'd like you to go to a exercise place and work out only for 20 minutes, 20 minutes, not a minute more. Walk in, do 20 minutes of whatever the hell you see to do, pick up a ball and bounce it for all I care, just 20 minutes, no more than that, until you call me back. I can do that. That's great.

until you call me back then we'll assess okay i'm very happy to help you with this transition yeah thank you so much you're welcome takes a lot of guts to get clean and sober it's just that as she so beautifully put you expect that everything's clear and everything's solved no now the hard work happens

And that's why support is necessary at a time like this. I admire people who make this effort. My number 1-800-375-2872. You're just a click away from some terrific deals being offered by companies that get the Dr. Laura stamp of approval. Visit drlaura.com. Click on sponsors to take advantage of the special discounts available to Dr. Laura listeners like you.

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