SUPERFLY #50 - Prison S*X
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Listen, Dana, New Year's resolutions are coming and a lot of people don't do them. A lot of people do do them. A lot of people don't. What's no? I said a lot of people don't do them. A lot of people, by the time you said do do them, I'd already said no. So I think resolutions are great. And I think learning a new language is

Because Rosetta Stone, one of our favorite sponsors, has got this. They've hacked this. They know how to do this. This is where you learn language, Rosetta Stone. Yeah. Sounds scary, but when they do it so much, they learn every year what people like, what they don't like, and they just get better and better. It's personal growth, you know? Language learning is something you...

It sounds overwhelming, but I think these guys know how to do it. It's a smart way to do it. But it's cool. Whenever you meet someone, all of a sudden they go, oh, yeah, we went to Paris. You did? And they go, you know, they speak a foreign language. It's always very impressive.

Because everyone travels, everyone's trying to get career advancement, cultural appreciation. But let's break down what Rosetta Stone does. Yeah, well, Rosetta Stone, first of all, it has speech recognition. So there's a built-in true accent feature that gives you feedback on your pronunciation. It's like having a personal trainer right there to help you. Right. And it's flexible. You're not driving 40 miles to go to some junior college. Nothing against them in a classroom. Some JUCO.

anytime, anywhere, learn on the go with the mobile app or at your desktop on your schedule. Right, David? How about the value, the amazing values? I like it's my schedule. I like they have a lifetime membership and that is all 25 languages. So,

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Today, we're starting, this is big time. This is the first time on our podcast that David has broadcast from a remote location. Yeah. Well, wait a minute. You did it for Paul McCartney. Oh yeah, McCartney. We were scrambling in New York to do it in our little crummy hotel rooms. Interview of my life in two hours of tech pressure. God dang it. Darn it.

I've probably never been more nervous for an interview.

And I see us as equals, me and Paul, so it sort of calmed me down. I have so much regret about everything I do. The last sketch I did on SNL, Sambando. Hey, Bongino. I didn't know what I was doing out there. And I just ran off and all I heard was crickets. So that tortured me over the holiday. It's a sickness. And then with Paul McCartney for the last two years when I think about it,

I regret not understanding the idea that I could bring up topics that he couldn't because he's a gentleman. Yes. And so that really, you know, do you ever have any kind of regrets about anything? I've never asked you this. Well, I do all the time, of course, daily, but...

And McCartney, you know, it's hard to ask about Lennon because Lennon died. Spoiler. But it's hard to say, hey, because it's so personal. Meanwhile, every interview, anyone asks me about anything personal, they don't care at all.

right they want to ruffle feathers we just show respect for him he showed respect for his bandmates uh but if the host in this case you and i yeah brought up something like who did the baseline there and who wrote that middle eight and did you help george with this part or anything like that in liver puddling in terms of like well i don't want to be a showboater you know yeah i don't want to be a chest slump he's uh

He's humble about it. He's a gentleman. He's a gentleman. We should have been, you know, fluffing his feathers a little bit, but I think he's been fluffing. I think he got over that podcast. Yeah. He's okay with it. One second after he's like, Google those guys. Let me see what I was just doing. All I know is you're entertainers.

You're into telling this? Anyway, so here we are. He thought he was on Good Morning America and it was going way long. He thought I was Matt Lauer. I didn't hear. I never knew about the controversy. He thought I was Katie Couric. He's got a great wig, whatever it is, on the top of his scully skull, Miss Scully. By the way, Dana, I think for the first time, viewers, millions of our viewers should know that I'm doing this, your trick, in front of a window. I'm not in love with it already, but-

I always have these trusty shades next to me. Like one time you wore shades. Remember we were doing in the bunker at my house? Oh, yeah. I used to wear funny hats and shades. That was before the podcast got monetized. Yeah. People started commenting. Take it a little serious. That's before it blew up. But yeah, now I'm looking out the window and I see why it's blinding. But you have good eyes, so it's okay. Do I? No one's ever said that to me except my wife.

You know who someone said to me the other day? I walked in this store. Why am I leaning? I walked in this store, just a regular dipshit, whatever, run of the mill. I see something in the window, tricked me to go in. And then the lady who's very eclectic, looks a little like Stevie Nicks, she just goes up. She goes, I like your look. I like the whole thing. And I go, I never get that, dude. Do you think she knew who you were?

I don't think that fast. She was, she was because she didn't say anything. And I go, Oh yeah, I don't, I don't get that. She goes, yeah, just, uh, no, I like any itemization here. Is it the, the scruff? Is it, is it the hair slicked back? Is it the shades? It was what I was wearing the shade. I was just nailing it. And, uh,

Like 10 out of 10. I mean, that's usually what I think, but no one's ever said, I mean, there's the Kate Spade of the family and then there's the D Spade. And I was never that one. Even Kate and Andy would make fun of me. Pop quiz for you. When you preem and primp and all that stuff before you're going to leave your house for whatever activity, what goes through your head like, uh, or uh?

Do you ever think to yourself, I look pretty good today? Yeah, I've thought that. Like right now on this camera, I don't look too bad, but for me, that's for me. I think it looks as good as your studio. Yeah. No, I mean, I'm just saying I comb my hair back and I got my hair trimmed the other day, so it's a little shorter in size, you know. But the idea of I look in the mirror maybe three times a day. I was trying to think of it the other day. I don't, unless I comb my hair because I have to see myself.

I don't look before I go out at night. I don't do any of that stuff. And I should, but sometimes it's not what I'm looking for when I see the answer. Well, there's your emotional brain and your logical brain. If you're at a restaurant with someone and you go use the restroom and you look in the mirror and you do a little readjusting of your hair, you know that no human being on earth would notice any difference except you. And you know what you look at that you think is rough. So anyway, I do find a way to get out of the house. And

And this sweater is totally Kanye. Can you see? I have so many holes in it because the moths fucking went at it and I grabbed the wrong one. You have moths in your- It's all holes. See that? So I walk in there and I go, what are you doing, moths? They're like, nothing. And we didn't do anything.

This is casual. Hey, you should go on SNL and dress up as a moth like Sarah does. Oh, and go do a fucking update? And eat Colin Quinn's suit. And now we're going to hear from Spade's moth that lives in his closet. And I come out, I'm fucking stuffed. And you're all got little feathers. What?

Yeah. Do they have feathers? Well, I don't know what they got, but I'm just saying someone's got booked for the 50th. I'm texting Lauren right now. I'd say, I know we're trying to make the show. We're trying to keep it to seven and a half hours. Spade wants to do moth guy. You know, we can put a light and I go, there's a light. Gotta go. It's a clever thing that Bowen started, I think, or lit it up with his iceberg character, Titanic thing.

And then Sarah's got her stuff. And then he did the drone. And he's done other things. So I think you as a moth, I'm just going to make a note to self. I have a question for you, Dana. Obviously, I'm going to jump around here. Obviously, on a flight, you don't like people hacking and coughing. I'm going to say yes. I was in a restaurant the other day, sitting at a six-top Lingo.

I have to know this because of the bus boys movie. Six Top. I know. You know from being a bus boy. I can consult on the movie. By the way, you can use this. We didn't call ourselves bus boys because we wanted to get girlfriends. So what do you do? I'm a table maintenance personnel manager. Jesus, administrator. That's good. Table maintenance personnel manager. Fred Wolf used to say,

People, yeah, he says, I'm a dishwasher. So if girls say, are you a dishwasher? They go, what are you doing? He goes, I'm the chairman of IBM. Okay, that's another. It sounds better. It's another way to go. So I go in and there was a sick person the week before. Fine. I go in and sit at a six tops. It's early.

And I always sit there. And then the waitress comes up and she's like, they're all very nice. Let's just start. This is just for entertainment purposes. Yeah. Like full deathbed. And I'm like, hey. And she's like, I can't. You know what? I'm not going to take your order. I'm probably just going to get out of here. And I go, great idea. You know, because...

And nobody wants to get sick. I would love to say, you know what? I can't get sick. I'm starting this movie. You don't have to, nobody wants to get sick. So I shouldn't even have to say that. I just go, yeah, that's probably the best idea. And she goes, ah, yeah, I feel like shit still air coming out. So I'm like, okay. And then she goes,

It's actually started last night. I was feeling so bad. I'm like, this is a wrap. We know, I 100% believe you. And then she goes, I'm actually going to talk to the manager, see if I can just punch out. And I go, I'll call corporate. Just go. We'll figure this out on the way home. Just because it's all, you know, there's dust from COVID in the air. I can feel it. You know, there's Omnicrons big enough that you can almost see them with your eye.

So she leaves. She goes in the back. Another waiter comes up. No. Another waiter. I know, but. Hey, man. I go, hey, is she okay? She's feeling bad. He goes, yeah, she actually left the other day. She was feeling bad. I'm like, oh, she's back. Okay. So I go, great. All right, let's order up. And he goes, to be honest, I'm not feeling a thousand percent. Jeez. A thousand percent either. I'm like, eh.

So I hustled through my order. Then I go talk to my buddy there. And then when I look back, they go, food's here. I look back and the waitress sat kitty corner from me at that table. So I go. Wait a minute. Is she dressed? I mean, she took off her apron. She's just joining you. She's probably looking for a ventilator. She's so sick.

that I want to just take a small propane flamethrower and just cover the table just to kill some of it, you know. But she sits and then I go and I sit because I have to sit in front of my breakfast. I don't know what to do to be rude. All of it's about not being an asshole. And the craziest part of me is that I sit there, aim straight ahead, and she's like... Sweat.

Hitting the table. And I'm like, it's a good effect. It's sickening. And just full on, like writing out her will. And then she, after about four solid minutes of silence, she goes, you don't mind if I sit here, do you? I go, not at all. Why am I a psycho? I go, not at all. Well, I'm just, you have to. And just promise me you will stop eating at Denny's. This is clearly Denny's.

It's a perfectly fine place. I told her, promise me you're not going to leave. I'm so overly nice. You're not at the Polo Lounge, the Beverly Hills Hotel. Dana, you're like this too. You're overly nice. And you're like, no, there's nothing you're doing that bothers me. Please stay and get better. Just stay here throughout your sickness and get better. Well, did she at least do six feet away? I mean, what are we talking here? Like a two footer? She was probably...

three and a half feet. But then I'm like, I hear some noise. I'm like, Oh, I guess that's, you're being choppered out of here. Get the fuck. I got cocky because I don't think I had a cold for a year. And then everyone at SNL has got a cold and I got cocky. I actually thought to myself, yeah, I, I some get colds. I don't know what's wrong when you were doing SNL. I got, you know, everyone's calling. I just don't, it's not invincible. It's not my thing. It's not my brand. It's not who I am. I don't get colds next morning. Razor blade. Ah,

Razor blade. Razor blade every time you swallow is not a good way to get a good slumber, spittle, spadle. When you catch yourself swallowing and then you swallow again and it hurts, you go, oh no, I can't stop swallowing. That's the grossest feeling like,

Well, you try to go, well, I was yelling last night at David Spade, you know, just tearing him a new one about the podcast. Give me your notes for my Hunter Biden who are just like screams. You're like, great stuff. We slam the door here. What are you doing? You call yourself Hunter Biden? You ain't a hunter and you're buying your time to stardom. No, you crushed it. Tom Hanks told me.

Specifically, he isolated me. He said very nice things about you, Hunter Biden, and he's probably the greatest actor in our generation. So it's high praise from that dude. Also, when I left the restaurant that day, of course, I went around the corner and took a Silkwood shower. Yeah.

like Meryl Streep when she went through the nuclear power plant. You're like a permanent meme. All your expressions and the sound effect. You're like just a series of memes. We got to get a cartoon caricature of you and make these memes. And I'm in the shower. I'm like,

You see David. Well, do you remember Silkwood? This is aging our audience, but of course, share Meryl Streep. What happens to Meryl Streep? She, there's a leak of the radiation. They're trying to do the China syndrome. Didn't quite make it. Yeah. But yeah, I can, without fucking syndrome, without Janie Fonda with her sleeveless top, I don't know what that means.

Showing her cleavage. No, there's a better word. So what are we doing with Meryl Streep and Cher? Do we have any connection here? I was saying that when she got a rip or something in her outfit and they said she might've gotten radiation, they go, come here for a second. Two seconds, strip down. And they put her in the shower and scrubbed her with steel wool or something. And she was screaming. And that reminded me of me leaving the restaurant. Yeah.

Radiation is actually maybe not that bad for you. It was kind of exaggerated. Oh. We get radiation all the time, you know. Because the next day I went in, I go, what was wrong with that lady? They go, oh, she had bad radiation. I go, oh, Dana said that's fine. Again, you're like a meme staring at something you don't want to see. Give me the look. Oh, no, that's more funny. Serious. That's cool. Also, Dana, we were talking about

Oh, there's a big fire in LA and we can't make light of it. It's actually a thousand percent terrifying because it's grittiness the day before. So we don't know where the fire is now, but it's very bad. And my big thing about it is, Heather can look this up. Is there no water in the fire hydrants? Is that even possible? I mean, I know they can't fly over.

Because the wind, they will be probably maybe by tonight or tomorrow. But there's no, it's like, how do you even try to stop it without dropping the stuff? They went to fire hydrants and some of them had no water. Why is that? I don't understand what's going on. I would need more information to have a strong opinion, but it seems like, you know, kind of a trying to suppress water or something. I don't know. I don't know. If a fire hydrant has no water, what is it?

Former LA water commissioner says mismanagement led to low hydrant levels. They ran out in the Palisades. They ran out in the Palisades. So some human beings, what's your job? Oh, I work for the water department. What is it? To make sure all the fire hydrants are full in LA. How you doing? Just got fired. I just got fired because I haven't really even checked on them because there's not that many fires. I knew they were pretty full, but I was tired. They took their eye off the pool.

I heard that, I just read, obviously everything I say is a lie, but I read that they had to cut budget last year and they did cut maybe 16 million, whatever that means in the grand scheme of things from the fire department. Now, if there has been horrible fires, I mean, they got to weigh it all out in fairness. Um,

Not a good look. We're the most fire-heavy place in the world. The high winds and the sparking towers made in 1870. I mean, the idea of... It's called essential services. Fire department, police department. I mean, there's more, but those are the big two. Garbage. Garbage.

Yeah, but you would survive garbage sitting on your sidewalk. But fire department, police department, I'm just going to say I'm going to call bullshit on that funding if that's true. And by the way, I'm running for L.A. County supervisor. Jeez Louise, Steve McQueen just walked into the podcast. David put on his superstar shades. I put on my Danny shades too bright. Now, Dana, um.

Let's move on from the fire because it's too tragic to even talk about. It's probably the worst fire ever. I've been there and it's only. Oh, no, no. It's horrible. That's all we're saying is that we we were in show business. So we know a few of these people that are being affected. And it's also true in California. It is sometimes almost impossible to get home insurance because a lot of the companies left. And so.

That's a double whammy if your house is going up and you don't have insurance. So anyway. And I think Florida is having the same problem with hurricane insurance. Like any insurance where the insurance tax to actually pay you, then they go, wait, whoa. I know someone who lives there and his insurance, home insurance tripled because two hurricanes hit it within two years. So, you know, what can I say?

Okay, Dan, anything else before we get to the news? Well, I just wanted to observe a few funny things because I'm watching New Trump.

Oh, yeah, that was good last week. And some of his phrases are like this. Nobody's ever seen it. Nobody's ever seen anything like it before. Nobody's ever seen it. No one's seen a case like that. They've never done it before. And all they do, and this is when he says talk, he makes a very specific mouth, which I'll do for our listeners and viewers. They've never seen it before. They've never seen anything like it. It's never happened before, quite frankly. All they do is talk.

All they do is talk. All they do. I'm telling you, all they do is talk. They just talk. That's it. They just talk. It's that far. They talk. They talk. They just talk. Then it goes back normal. I don't know what they're doing, but all they do is talk. They talk.

It does go. It's kind of when he went. China. That's right. They go China. They go, they've never seen it and they're doing things you wouldn't believe. And all they do, by the way, all they do is talk. They're all talk and no action. And this is the only time he makes this specific lips like this. All talk, no action, all talk, no action. I'm trying to give Patrick, our editor, different angles. It's funny. Yeah.

It's like that old song. All they do to me is talk, talk, talk, talk. Remember talk, talk? All they do and we're looking at things and we're seeing things and all they do is talk. He's trying to say tick, talk. All they do is talk. They talk and they talk and they never stop talking.

He took the L for sure. I like the mouth. All right. Now I have Trump. The other funny thing is... We don't need anything else. That's unreal. Trump is so entertaining, I have to say. If you're not panicked by him, he's just fucking funny. I mean...

He's coming out now. He wants Panama Canal. He wants Greenland. He's taking over. Yeah, that's great. We're going to take over Greenland. We're taking over Greenland. We're going to take it over. We're going to call it Even More America. That's the new name of that place. Even More America. Even More America. We're taking over the Panama Canal. We're going to take it because we built it. We built it. And all they do is talk.

Old talk. We're going to call it USA's Super Canal. We're taking over Tahiti and Bora Bora. Tahiti and Bora Bora. This is not talk. It's not talk. We're taking over Tahiti. We're calling it the beautiful American islands. And by the way, Canada is now, we're taking them over. It's going to be called Amerida. We're calling it Amerida. It's Amerida. Canada, Amerida.

Yeah, maybe Super America up there.

It never made any sense. We've got Alaska up there. Then we've got a shit ton of Canada. Then we've got America. Too much Canada between here and Alaska, right? It's like if Florida was another country, it's like a thumb hanging off America. But it's ours. It's totally ours. Ponce de Leon. Ponce de Leon. You remember him? A lot of people talk about Ponce de Leon. A lot of people do. The fountain of youth in Canada. But all they do is talk shit.

All they do is don't. That's my new toy today. It's all they do. I like it. He did. He did it. We don't even cut this. He did a 20 minute rant on electric heaters versus gas heaters. You know what Biden was, what they want. They want electric heaters. You get them. They don't work very well. You get itchy. Quite frankly, you get itchy with electric. The gas is better. It looks better. It heats you up like you wouldn't believe in that canceling water. They're making dishwashers that don't have any water and

you put your stuff and it comes out. It's not clean. You got to run it 10 times and you end up using more water. By the way, to our audience, these are direct quotes. Yeah. The dishwashers, the washers, they don't have a lot of water. They're worried about water. Even the way of places it's coming down from heaven. We have so much water. They want to stop the water in your washer. You wash your clothes. They come out with the duty. You got to do it 10, 20 times. Yeah. And all they do is talk.

I will say if California has to do electric cars by 2030, I'm not ready. I'm not throwing away my cars because just during this fire, a lot of electricity is out. So now where are you? Well, we go electric and then gas and energy prices go down because we're not using any of it. And then the CO2 goes up. There's a thousand metrics into this idea of the planet warming. Let's talk about it, people, rather than just do things emotionally.

I like my high bread. Sorry. You just talk. They talk. That's all they do is talk. Just got to start them up again. And no one's ever seen it. No one's ever seen anything like this. No one's ever seen it. No one's ever seen it. And all they do is talk. It has to be the channel. Mar-a-Lago, we all have a lot of dirty dishes. And I had one more thing I was going to do because I had so much fun. Dirty dishes. The last SNL episode.

A lot of our friends were there, Tina and everybody. But I hadn't seen Jimmy Fallon in a while. So the minute I see him, he's like so much fun. And it's such an upper. He goes, hey, this is crazy. Dana Kirby. Oh, what's going on, Dana Kirby? Hey, so I start doing Johnny Carson getting pulled over for drunk driving. You know, sorry, officer. I didn't know I was swerving. I had two slippery monkeys at the hook and crook.

And Jimmy blew a gasket like his head. Oh, my God. Oh, it's so funny. John Carson pull over. He's talking to Tom Hanks. John Carson pulled over. Don't drive me. Hey, I had a tomato boom. The desperate sponge. Dana Kirby is so funny. All they do is all they do is joke.

Anyway, I just had so much fun. So here's Jimmy Fallon getting, gets a, gets the check in a restaurant. I'll take a check. Oh my God, this is insane. Look at this check. Oh my God. I can't believe it. It's insane.

That's it? That's it. It's a little wispy, but I like it. Well, I took it really far. All right, we have six minutes. Well, no, I have to say that the pickup on last week's show, every week they pick some article up. Because of some crazy stuff you said. What got picked up? Yeah, well, I didn't read the article because I just thought it was about that we said, I can't believe people text Lorne.

because i couldn't right but it was nothing negative i'm like i wish i could have gotten to lauren it was like that ninth floor door is shut you're not talking to him you know you know what i mean you have to get an appointment and well you know i saw that and i thought about it later and what we didn't have to call lauren we'd have to go to her office dial nine yeah get a landline number see it's fun

Hello. Hi, Lauren. It's Dana. I'm in my office at 8-6. Lauren's not here right now. Lauren's not here right now. Let me give you to Marcy. Hi, it's Marcy. Yeah, so I felt like it sounded like I was being negative that I was making fun of. I didn't see this part till today that in that in that meeting between dress and air that Lauren is talking and he told Sarah Sherman. I just love making fun of Sarah Sherman and she goes and he goes.

Sarah, you have to face forward a little more just so the light hits you. She goes, I'll try. Try? It was funny. Sarah's, her charm is that she just says what's on her mind and she's very open. She's hilarious. And she's hilarious. And so I could see the way she would be casual with Lauren would just sort of work. It would be cute, yeah. Okay, well, all right. But I think that we were in those early days of,

Maybe, I don't know, we just weren't as familiar with Lorne. Lorne was our boss, the executive producer, the guy who started Saturday Night Live. And so I think for a few, it took me a while to get comfortable with Lorne because the way I really got to know Lorne, maybe you could chime in on this, is when you go back and you host...

And then you're kind of hanging out with Lorne a lot as a host. It's a different thing. And you're seeing how he's just casually always producing. It's just put over there. Maybe he put, let's move this. I think the cold opening is fine. All I'm saying is, and so you realize, and also when you see him on the floor, you know, the guy is, he, he,

He cares about that show. First of all, he's so freaking happy when the show works or the cold opening works. And if it's starting to go sideways, this is why no one else does live comedy sketch because it's so fucking hard. So anyway, you get to know Lauren, but the idea that Sarah has it already and is sort of friendly with him. Yeah. I mean, did you ever walk by Lauren and see him in the hallway and go, hey, Lauren, I'm going to Huxley's. You want me to grab you a tuna melt? Actually, why don't you come with me? Yeah.

come with you what lauren we're going to the comedy strip come on man marcy would tackle me yeah uh she could too listen it's a new year new year of proposals oh yeah lots of people popping the big question sure it's a huge moment but what they don't tell you is how many decisions you have to make when choosing

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Right now, $50 off your purchase of $500 or more with code fly at BlueNile.com. That's $50 off with code fly at BlueNile.com. That's BlueNile.com. Well, it's January, Dana. I don't know if you have checked the calendar. I don't check the calendar, but I just sense the holidays are over, the hustle and the bustle and the rustle and the bustle.

The whole turkey and the cheese and the Santa and the blah, blah, blah. It's over. But it's now a time to recover. Think a little bit. After all that holiday spending, you know who you are. It's a hangover for your credit. That's right. That's what I say. Yeah. You got to get back on track in 2025. Yep. This is the year.

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You're in a tough spot. Kickoff helps you build that credit. Let's say you want to get a car this year. You want to do anything that involves credit, lower level, bigger scale. You got to build it up. You got to start somewhere. Right. And so this way it always seems overwhelming. How do I do it? And kickoff kind of starts you slow and then slowly but surely you can. Let's say your credit. I don't know what yours is, Dana. Let's say it's 600, right? You could jump 28 points in the first month.

Wow. And that's noticeable. That's a chunk. Kickoff is smart. It's a legit credit hack with no catch.

Do you know what I'm saying? No credit, no hidden fees, no interest. Hello. You start building credit immediately for only $1 your first month. Now that is, that's, that's just says that everyone can engage with kickoff $1 a month. It just builds slowly. You know what compounding is, David? I sort of, yeah. We'll talk later. By the way, in the app store, it has over a hundred thousand positive reviews.

Wow. 98% or five stars. Sounds familiar. Like my act. Listen, shake off the credit card hangover and look forward to a brighter credit with Kickoff. Get your first month for just a dollar at getkickoff.com slash superfly today. That's 80% off Kickoff without the C. Get.

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Terms and conditions may apply. Point stat based on Equifax Vantage score 3.0. Changes for kickoff users starting under 600 who made their first on-time payment between January 2021 and March 2024. Payment and credit activity outside kickoff can have an impact on your credit. Individual results may vary. Okay. All right. Let's get back to really important things. What are our dumb stories we're talking about? Let's get some headlines going.

My forehead looks the same color as the wall behind me. I guess that's... That's a funny observation and true. They mix together. It's not good or bad. Look at that, Heather. You see my forehead looks the same color as the wall. Okay, people driving. Prison officer filmed having sex with inmate admits another incident on same day. And this is a female prison officer? The officer is the guy or the girl? Let me see. That's on time. OnlyFans model...

Oh, so she's a prison officer and an OnlyFans model. Wait, she was jailed after. Oh, she's the officer. You can tell we don't look at these ahead of time, folks. No, that's good. We don't. That's true. Okay. So she caught on her body cam. What are you? What? I'm not saying the word dipshit, but you, I mean, she knows she's doing it. Does she air that as part of her OnlyFans? I'm sure. I mean, why else that? And you're going to get caught.

There's been a lot of prison movies. I think Ben Stiller did one about female police officers having sex with inmates.

So now it's a true story. Listen, I'm fine with it. Hey, scroll down a little bit because I want to read that. It says, it's a funny word, prison officer filmed having sex with a burglar in his prison cell. Why are they so specific? Lies, lies. Who calls anyone a burglar anymore?

Well, first of all, that's a pretty, I mean, it's awful if you're a burglar, but that means it's someone trying to get into a house without hurting anybody and just get the freak out. Is that what it means? I think a burglar is just sort of trying to sneak in and sneak out. Your house is burgled?

Yeah, and also they would do it if, like, say you were not in your house right now and you're at another location, it would be a perfect time for someone to burglar. Oh, forget. Sorry, I brought that up. Yeah, I've been burgled. That's a word. That would be, you've been burgled. Yeah. Well, as we said, the Hamburglar, I never saw him actually in jail. He was always out on parole.

Well, my forehead is exactly the color now as the sheets. No, it was like Heather was painting the wall and just happened to slap your forehead. Make it a little less. So, because Dana looks like he's got some color in his face. No, but look, I want to. Well, I have different. Oh, yeah. I'm facing a window. I have ring lights. Ring lights that have color. We look pretty good. No one's going to notice this bullshit. We'll do a new story. Yeah.

Oh, God. You look fantastic. Everyone's running fucking like a chicken with their head cut off because I moved the curtain two inches. Anyway. Like Woody Allen came out for a second. Please, to me, throw the earth off its axis.

Okay. What's next? My forehead's the color of the Ramada Inn. Please rent an ad on my forehead for the fly on the wall. Also, the super fly. It's all available. What is this? Oh, hang on. Oh, this is a different OnlyFans girl saying how much the one we did a report on actually makes.

Okay. Let's see if it's shocking or not. Too much is the answer, by the way. Outfielder. Yeah.

But this is a gross number and a lot of things are going to be coming out of this. For example, right off the top, OnlyFans is going to be taking 20%. Ooh, what a hack. So that's 43 million drops to 34.4 million. Now somebody of her caliber definitely has an agency.

to help with marketing and posting. And this agency also takes a percentage. And agencies in general take a percentage of anywhere from 15% to all the way up to 60%. What? 60? Get fucked. Now it drops her income down to $22.4 million. And then the government put it on this.

Nobody is exempt. Video taxes. We all have to pay taxes. Oh, yeah. Welcome to the club. So if you're based in Florida and you're making over a million dollars a year, your average tax percentage should be around 35%. We take 35% off of the 22 million. And now we are all the way down to $14.5 million take home, which is still huge.

huge amount of money. Yeah, no shit. All right. First of all, you want to be an agent in that story up to 60%. They start with 60 and then if people go, I'm sorry, what? They go, no, I'm saying 50. And then they grind them down to what? 15 was it? Well, she's got 14 million net, net, net. That's pretty good.

How embarrassing. I know, but still. 14 mil? That's like literally zero for an OnlyFans model. But did you hear, and we could probably look this up, another one of my lies, that I heard the average OnlyFan girl makes about a thousand a month. That makes sense. That makes more sense, right? Because not everyone has a huge audience. You could say, I'm taking off my clothes. Hey, everybody. You have to let your followers know. And if you don't, then you're a hoax.

Wow. We're getting a newsflash that you get 150, 180 per month, most OnlyFans. Wow. 2,000 a year? That's the tough decision because you only hear these stories of how great it is. If you're dancing in a G-string and you're making $150 a month, then you got to check what's going on with your person. I mean, what is that? Yeah. I mean, it's still money, but you got to weigh it out, I guess. Yeah.

It is true. I remember Jay Leno telling me once, yeah, that's why we get paid a lot of money because after they take everything, you still got a pretty good check. Yeah. I mean, there's some things you still don't get. At this point, if you go to Jimmy Fallon, what do you make? $780? Well, it's the exposure. That's just union money.

That wasn't the question, sir, on the stand. Lady Gaga got $17 million for five minutes on Colbert's show. She just has that kind of clout. Wait, why am I getting $780? I don't know. OnlyFans is a fascinating thing. And we should, for just because Superfly, and this is for Sophie, let's get...

Oh, you want to get one of them on an Oscar? Let's get an OnlyFans. We'll get that Sophie Rain on. Yeah, that's doing well. And just really think of it as it grosses like six, eight billion a year. It's bigger than- The NBA salaries all combined, right? It's bigger than U.S. Steel. Yeah. I don't know that movie. I'm too young. Godfather and U.S. Steel is a big controversy. I don't know what that is.

A Japanese steel company wants to merge with U.S. Steel, and some people say it's a great deal for both. It'll give us a steel industry. And then some people say we should keep U.S. Steel separate from our friends. From China. China. Right now, they're talking about it. They're talking a lot, but it's all talk. It's all talk. That's all it is. Now, let me change the subject.

I hate that talk is such an easy one to get back to. China, this merger is just talk right now. It's just talk. They've never seen it. We've never seen it. He's talking about the lawsuits. They've never seen it before. Talk about never seen it. Who's seen Greenland? Who's going up there for a vacation? It's a lot of fun. It's a lot of fun. By the way, it's got oil, natural gas, and rare minerals. And you can take a ship. We have an air base there.

But the people, there's only 57,000 people there, and they mostly sell fish to Denmark. You've got to bring in the big boys for all the oil, gas, and minerals. So that's why Trump will get the rare minerals. They're rare.

The reason they're rare is because you don't see them a lot. That's a very underused word, rare minerals. You got to have them. China has a lot of them. But right now, it's all done. Trump goes up there to sort of shake hands and say, hey, what's this, a largemouth lunker bass? What do you got here? He's trying to blend in with the locals to-

pitch the sale. Yeah, I know. Trump Jr. just went in and just hung out. He just hung out. But the thing is, those people make an average newsflash, $36,000 a year for the average Greenland human being. So Trump will say, we'll give you a million a year each.

You can also buy a cow for a nickel up there. To make it, what did I call it? Even more America. Even more America is our latest acquisition. That would be the biggest state, probably, Greenland, because it's three times as big as Texas. Is it? It's 80% covered in ice. The reason it's called Greenland is when the Vikings and the Danes went in there, it was all green and lushed.

So if it melts, we may see. So is my wife. That's what you should say if you're Henny Youngman. It's 80% covered in ice. So is my wife. There you go. That's a good one. It was a hair late. No, let's do it officially so Patrick can clip it. Okay, ready? Go. Greenland is covered 80% in ice. Yeah, so is my wife.

Well, that sounded too sincere. So is my wife. You almost won it. I should have done it. Use the other so is my wife, Patrick. We'll see what that looks like. Yeah. Okay. Next story. Here we go. We're doing good. We're doing good. Listen, growing your small business in 2025 all comes down to how well you can hire. That's right. The first name that's going to come up is LinkedIn. That's just the way it is. Better hires start with better, smarter insights.

They have the strongest hiring data. They have insights. They help you identify the right candidates. You make the best hiring decisions. I'd start off the new year right. You got to be smart and go with LinkedIn, right?

There are once again, they're doing all the all the legwork and vetting people and giving you a really good idea so you can match your needs to who they have available to hire. So I'm going to call it a no brainer. I'm just bringing that word out, just bringing out the big guns. LinkedIn knows hiring is a big deal for small businesses, not only because small businesses are wearing so many hats, but also because every hire is crucial.

for growing a company, David. That's right. So small businesses is. That is a tough word. No, they, listen, we know they, they do it right. Based on LinkedIn data, 72% of SMBs using LinkedIn say that LinkedIn helps them find high quality candidates. Listen, they go, they match it perfectly. They do all the work you don't want to do.

They go beyond candidates who are actively applying. Any given week in LinkedIn, 171 million LinkedIn members aren't actively seeking jobs but are opening new opportunities. And that's a big pool to miss if you're not on LinkedIn. Post your job for free at linkedin.com slash wall. That's linkedin.com slash wall to post your job for free. Terms and conditions apply. The Apple Watch Series 10 is here. It has the biggest display ever.

You know, I hate to get serious here, Dana, but

The family depends on you. And everyone needs to think about this, get serious about something every family needs, which is life insurance. That's very true. Ethos has made securing life insurance as smooth as possible because, you know, normal coverage from work may not be enough. The rates go up as you age. With ethos, you can apply for affordable life insurance quickly and easily and

online and all without a medical exam. Just answer a few health questions for a free quote. And that's in less than 10 minutes at ethos.com slash fly FLY. You know, cause a lot of times David, um,

Work provided life insurance may not be enough. You know, the rule of thumb is to have a coverage that's 10 times your salary. But an employer provided life insurance typically doesn't cover maybe one or two times your salary. You see what I'm saying? Yeah, you got to read and find out what it is, because if you haven't used Ethos, you know, there's complications. Like when these things happen and you never know.

We've got aliens out there. We've got a lot of things going on. And you never know. You never know. There's people I've heard of. Something like that happens and then everyone's just jammed. And you don't want to jam up the family. Suddenly the income's gone and you got mortgage, you got tuition, bills. Oh, yeah. I think it just feels like it's too much money for people. So they should call and just check because...

If it's affordable, then you're in, you know, I would just at least try, you know, or if you don't want to deal with a whole medical exam, you just have to answer a few questions. It's online, you know, a few health questions. It's worth it. I mean, something like this ethos, it's going to get you coverage quick, easy, fast.

and all online, that's quite an advantage because it- Way simpler. Two million families have trusted Ethos to help find the right coverage. Give your family peace of mind today for whatever the new year brings. Term life policies start as low as $10 a month. Okay. Get your free quote at ethos.com slash fly. That's E-T-H-O-S dot com slash fly. All right. Here we are. Look at this.

Oh, teen finds out anonymous internet bully who harassed her for a year is her own mom. Oh, Mount Pleasant, Michigan. I'm from Michigan. This is the one that has like the music behind it. It goes scary music. I was doing a mission possible sub theme. Oh, you were sorry. I stepped on it. That's mission impossible.

That's Popeye. I lost it. I'm so into the finish because I eat my spoon. Yeah, that's it. And all of it is old talk. My first bit, I've said it before, my first bit in 19... Oh, you did Popeye? Ladies and gentlemen, Popeye getting kicked in the groin. Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

I was not expecting that. I know. It's just, if I get any claps from David Spade. I like that one. That was a good one. You know, Popeye, speaking of Popeye, that goes public domain, more fishy fucking guesses on my part. Public domain like Mickey Mouse and Winnie the Pooh. So they're going to make a horror movie about it, I think.

But they can't use spinach. I heard that too. This all sounds like a lie. Oh, a mashup Popeye in a horror film? Yeah, like make Popeye. I'm going to, I hate olive oil. Then he stabs her and he's like, oh, I'm not a great guy after all. And then what's his name? Wimpy comes in. I'll gladly stab you tomorrow if I can stab you today. For a hamburger today? For a hamburger.

Wimpy's like on drugs. He was adding nothing. But I did always laugh when he'd say that. I'm like, like even in a comic strip, I'd laugh. I'll gladly pay you tomorrow for a hamburger today is brilliant. Tuesday. That's like hear me now and believe me later. Listen to me. Hear me now and believe me later. I like how we don't even talk about the mom who's, I guess it's just sort of discipline, right? I assume it's parenting in her mind. Yes. Mm-hmm.

Not in mine. That's rough. It depends on how rough she got. I like to make the kid look like they're in Squid Game for some reason in this photo. Yeah. If your kid is dressed like that, which is this death mask and a pink jacket with a hood on, you maybe want to harass him online just to get him to take off the mask.

Unless that's just to hide his identity. You were chopping. You're being choppy, but we got it. Patrick's got it. Okay, let's go to one more. Oh, we got time. What time is it? We always say one more. We got time. People are too riveted. They're on the edge of their seat during this. The edge of their car seat. What's this? What kind of things are you seeing? Oh, this is funny. Okay, this is a woman from America seeing Big Ben.

As you know, Big Ben is a big clock in London. I don't know if it's in Piccadilly Square. But this woman sees it. This is the reaction I would figure also Dana having too. But then some kid gives a summary. So watch her and then watch the kid's summary. Stand up right now. Fucking stand up. Why the hell was she crying over a clock? I've lived in the UK.

and in London for eight years and I've seen this every single time and if I was even in America I would not start going on the floor going what's Big Ben done what's Big Ben done for you as he cleans your house is he a maid at your house is he done has he oofed your floor no he's not he's a clock bluff

He's a big, massive clock that lives in the middle of London. Why are you crying over a fucking clock? So that's her mother? No, that's just some chick on TikTok. Oh, it's just, okay. So that kid seems like she's 37 years old. Not visually. She looks eight, but it's like extremely mature.

Why would you cry over a clock, mother? Why are you falling on the ground? It's a fucking clock. If you saw a human being who was over six feet tall, would you sob? Look how tall they are. It's stupid. Yeah. Cry. Cry over things. I want to follow this lady around, see what she's crying over every day. Anything that's bigger than normal.

She got a giant hamburger and sobbed for two hours. It was larger than a regular hamburger. Don't let her near Randy's donuts. The donuts on the outside are so large, she broke down in tears and had to be taken away by an EMT squad. Dana's choppy. I'm choppy. You're blurry. Break the tie, Greg. I'm blurry? Well...

Oh, it is? Don't you fucking dare blame me. It's blurry and choppy. That should be our show. By the way, this hotel graciously said we'll give you some dog shit internet that nobody knows what we're doing. You know what I did for our friend Paul McCartney going full circle? I went to the Four Seasons way up in the mountains because the Wi-Fi was sketchy down in Jackson Hole. Right on.

I can hear and see you. Terrific. Thank you for traveling to a better hotel. Well, at least you saved a couple of bucks on the hotel. I can tell it's a cheap. No, I made a nice hotel, but we went and said, we don't want the regular internet. Where's the back door special? And so they're like, here we go. Ding. So this is the good stuff. You thought you got good. Oh, okay. Gotcha. Fast. Yeah, no, we vetted this whole thing because I knew if I'm on the road,

I got to make sure we can do this and nail it and make it a thousand percent because all of our millions of views, they freak out. What's going to happen, Greg? Oh, here's another story. Okay. I just thought this was interesting. Okay. This isn't great. This isn't hilarious. I was thinking I could watch this for now. How is rubber made from rubber tree? How do you harvest rubber? I like that scrape noise. It's a specific tool. We never think of doing it like this. Very straight lines. Yeah. Freehand. Yeah.

What's that? I like this little instrument. That's me with my toenails at night. Is that the actual rubber that's coming off? I would never think this tree was rubber tree. I think it was some dumb shit tree. Run of the mill bucket. Oh, look, everybody. Jose just made a little tap and then here comes it. And then it kind of... Is that it? Wowee.

That's what rubber looks like coming right out. That's what it sounds like. I don't like the water part. God, get a grip on it, dude. Relax. Rubber trees really were named properly. That's a lot of work. They don't do anything with it.

She's collecting rubber. You're not making a tire out of that. Why are they black? They don't do anything with it. No, but that was a rubber tree. Go, if you're driving, go look at YouTube around 45 minutes and you'll see it. It's fascinating. That was kind of cool. It was cool. Very light tapping. An angle. Scraping. And then a funnel. So some of it came out kind of watery. And then it coalesced into a big thing. I think it's like sap. Coalesced, he said. YouTube's going to light up over that one.

What are you, a keelah and a bee? Okay, what's the next thing? What's this? Human deaths caused by animals. Oh, okay. Heather, pay attention. This is interesting. This is going to tell us what... It's kind of like the running thing we did. What animals and how many deaths do they cause per year in order? We're starting at the lowest. So bats, bears. Okay, sharks, I get it. Mooses more than sharks. Spiders...

Wolves. Cows. Cows used to, yeah. Horses, even more. Lions and leopards make sense. Ants, Dana. Bees. Bees because allergic. Jellyfish. Tiger. Tiger that far ahead of shark. Deers ahead of tigers.

Hippopotamus way up there. Elephant killing us. Tape worms. Crocodiles. Never liked them. Scorpions. Scorpion. Wow. And what's the... Tsetse flies. Tsetse flies.

And then assassin bug, snails. Snails? Snails kill us. Dogs number way above everyone else. Snakes. Wow. Humans killing other humans. 430,000. That's the big payoff. Mosquitoes above humans. But tsetse fly, where is that? In Africa? I've heard of them. It's in Tsetse, the land of Tsetse. You fly over it. I don't know. It's Africa, I think. I think it's that. Or Southeast Asia, you know.

Communical disease carriers. What about... Okay, shocking on that was... Cows. Dogs are so high. But why do cows... How do cows kill you? Because I'm around cows a lot, and they don't want anything to do with me. Oh, I'd be scared. Oh, you know, if you had a bull, that's different. If you have female cows, the bulls will attack. Oh, because if you're flirting with one of their...

Okay, and then toward the end, hippopotamus, there's not that many, are there? 20 to 25 deaths occur each year from cattle. Involves the bulls. There it is. Yeah. Oh, multiple. Multiple cows are involved in most attacks. And it's bulls with horns and shit, and they want to fuck you up. Yeah. Well, I thought, who else was on that list that was really odd? Owls didn't make it for the third year in a row.

One thing they left out was who kills more humans than anyone else? And then it would say David Spade because you kill your audience as a stand-up. Sorry. Long way to go. David Spade was a killer last night. Oh, you killed him. Hey, Heather, turn this light up a little bit more so it doesn't match. For the only reason so it won't match. So we have 30 seconds to go and now you're doing a lighting design. There you go. Now turn that one. I'll close that one.

We're doing a whole thing here. Listen, we're not fucking goop. Oh, it is a little dark. Jesus Christ. Claude Rains just walked into the podcast. Go that side. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you can't do that side. All right. We're back to normal. Wait, hold on. Stop, stop, stop. Right in the middle. Very microscopic. There. Beautiful. That's fine. Nope. I got to put these on. It's what matches. Oh, where are the sunglasses? You got a continuity browser. Yeah, I can't know. We got to match. Okay. What's next story?

I like to bark out orders. Hey. Okay, hold on. Wait. I think so.

Let's see what this is. I don't know. Tell us how you are going to break. There's a guy sitting there and he's going to talk. Break the world record for sleeping with the most men in one day. I'm trying to get 1,000 guys in 24 hours. My plan kind of is to, it needs to be a room with two doors is what we're trying to work out. The logistics of this is insane because one thing, it's hard enough getting 1,000 guys together. It's another thing actually like making sure they all do it in the time limit. So honestly, I'm just hoping for like a conveyor belt of confidence.

Like they need to kind of like walk in the room, one pump in one pump out and then leave. Current world record though. It's 990. And I want to get to a thousand. It's like nine and just week. You may as well have got to a thousand. You know what I mean? This is why I'm training. I mean, you know, I've done the hundred in like a few weeks.

She's going to do 300 to warm up. Well, I think as long as they're in, out, in, out, in, out, it's going to be pretty quick. I think I'll get us all towards the end, but I think I've got... I hope. Right, determination. Well, look, listen.

The funny part is, like, she says the world record. She retires. She wants to start a family. She's dating regular guys. They're having a glass of wine. The guy says, well, let's just be honest. You know, I've had a little bit of sexual experience. Just tell me, how many men have you been with? I mean, ballpark. What's your body count? Five, six, ten. And then she has to say, 17,000. Yeah. Yeah.

It's a tough number. Is that real? First of all, is that real? Well, she just broke a record for, it's like a new kind of thing they're doing for clout where. But is there any evidence it's real? Um, they interviewed the guys. Well, cause how many guys would you sign up for that? Would you be number 684? Do they pay them? Well,

Well, you know, my nickname in high school was I was a boxer and they called me the one pump chump. I think that's why they called me that. So you might go through, get in line and come through another time with sunglasses on the second time. Yeah. High five. Yeah, no, I don't know how it works. They did a hundred and she said she had nightmares after. I'm like, I don't even know what's going on with the world. It's really just an...

She's going for a record. And is Guinness Book really coming out there with the nerdy guy going, well, I don't. I mean, they did interview her parents, you know, very working class Brits, and they're very sweet about it. Hello. But always be proud of our daughter. She's a hard worker. She's worked her way up to a thousand million. It took a lot of effort and time and strategy. Oh, I'm all done.

is the nicest person in the world. She's got a heart of gold. She likes having sex with thousands of men, but she's not all talk. She's not. Oh, no. She's not talking. She's not saying I'm going to have sex with a thousand men. It's not all talk. Yeah. You know, even if she gets 900, we'd still love her.

And McCartney was, it's a lot of shaking, I'll be honest. You know, it's more than you can really comprehend. I'm sure McCartney put up some world record numbers back in the day. Who was the horniest Beatle? We should have asked him. Who was the horniest?

Probably Ringo. Probably has to be the drummer. Piece of love, piece of love. Oh yeah, that's a tell. I think Lennon had bed ends. That guy's horny. But what about George Harrison looked like pretty chill. I think they were all kind of the marrying kind. They all got kind of married and a couple of divorces and married again. I mean, the Beatles are actually pretty corn straight. I think what happens, that kind of fame, it's so overwhelming to even talk to someone that they...

Probably no girl that's a fan could even comprehend they were even in the same room with him. So it's just too weird. They just got to find one person where it's normal and stay with them. Paul's first wife, Linda Eastman, she was a well-known photographer from a very renowned family, Eastman Kodak. And she had a child from a previous marriage. And so she was very grown up.

And I think, and lovely. And so I think that's what attracted Paul to her. To your point, David. Yeah. Okay, let's do one more. And then we'll talk about how horny other band members. That was a good question. We blew it with Paul. Okay, let's see what this is. Wait, is this another...

Oh, is this? Oh, this is robots. They made robots to look like ants and they give them chores. I'm already scared. Go ahead. Move. Ooh, saw my. Creepy.

Dana, we're going to fill you full of robot ants. How do you get them the F out of your body after? They just leave. They come out the way they came in. You're out of here. We're done, guys. Punch out. You don't need the music.

By leveraging their collective strength and synchronized actions, they successfully overcame barriers, demonstrating their ability to adapt and perform tasks that required precise teaming. The micro-robots used centrifugal force for self-throwing, propelling themselves over obstacles. A swarm of 200 micro-robots successfully separated heavy liquid metal into smaller pieces in just five seconds, despite its high surface tension.

They then moved the pieces, joined them back together, and shaped the metal. Dude, if these get loose, that's it. This demonstrated their ability to handle complex tasks with precision and control. Let's ask AI. Well, AI is going to make all that possible. They'll cut to an actual ant going, Why do we even try? Oh, well. This just denoted a fake ant person. Why do we even try? They're all told. And then another ant goes,

It's not much, but it's honest work. I'll be honest with you. I'm just an ant, but I see that and I go, you know, it's all right. What else you got is what I'm saying. The ants are leaning in an alley going, these fucking ant robots are going to take over. That's it. That's it for us, guys. You see?

The question is, do they have a queen bee? Do they have a nest with a queen bee? They got no queen bee. The best part is they don't. They don't need it. The ants are like, we never needed it. We never needed the queen. We can do this. We just got to get over it. And by the way, to go full circle, you know what a queen bee does all day? Has sex with a thousand ants. Oh, he does. Just based on that. I thought the queen bee was going to be all talk. All talk. This is the all talk.

All talk, all talk. That's all there was. And everybody's eating all talk, all talk. All talk phase. All talk. All right, I think we should end on that, Dana. Any final remarks? I'm going to continue for the next Superfly with my all talk motif. No, I'll have a new one for next week, folks. And we are looking forward to getting some people, some scientists and different people. I actually have an idea for a brilliant investor to teach people how to really invest in the stock market.

David. Sweet. Heather. Greg. Yeah, everybody. You're right. And YouTube Shorts, we put up the new version of Trump, which is you going slower. Don't give it away.

That was Trump speaking softly instead of screaming at the big rallies. Yeah, because now he won. Now he's like, now I can just slow down. And what we're going to do. He talked for a half hour straight in the most abstract way. It was really entertaining. I recommend it to anybody.

We're looking at a lot of things. You don't want dirty dishes. You got to do them six times. Sir, will you attack Panama, the country of Panama? I'm not going to rule anything out. I'm not going to rule it out. I'm not going to. He wants Panama. He wants the Gulf of America. And he wants even more America, i.e. Greenland.

He should take South America. They're halfway there. And what would the name be? South America. No, we'd rename it to America. Lower America? Lower America. Additional America after the skinny connected part. America Plus, then they can charge you. Oh, I know it would be South Central America. South Central America. Like Disney.

Because we have Central American sales. All right. All right. So we'll figure it out. Thank you, Dana. Are you working tonight? Friday night? Yeah. Show tonight. Where is it? Is it sold out? Should we plug it? No, it's a corporate. Whoops. That's all right. It's going to be great. This is one where they don't want me to be dirty. And then I just saw two employees downstairs and they go, you better be dirty tonight. And I'm like...

I can't. I get in trouble. You never listen to the employees. You get the cue from... They're like, sorry. I know, because the audience is not as prudish as the team that's scared of offending them. That's the irony. Yeah. They laugh if you...

Anyway. All right. Well, my banana looks like a dolphin. Weirdly enough, right now, your lighting is the best it's been during the whole podcast. What is that? What was the impression? It looks like a dolphin. Oh. Flipper. Flipper. Okay. I miss you, Dana. I'll see you when I'm back. We'll talk to you just later.

This has been a presentation of Odyssey Superfly. It's executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Jenna Weiss-Berman of Odyssey, Heather Santoro, and Greg Holtzman. Hope you liked it.