Sebastian Maniscalco: Are You Still Enjoying That?
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Hey, everybody. Welcome to Literally. This is a good one. We've got Sebastian Maniscalco. Very funny gentleman. Very funny. He's got a sick movie coming out. He's working with Robert De Niro. I haven't. I need to find out what it's like because my time's running out. I need to find out what it's like to work with Bob De Niro and talk about comedy with one of the funniest, most successful comedians of our time. Stand by.

How are you, man? Welcome aboard here. Thanks. Thanks for having me on. I got to ask you, I mean, I've been looking at you age from afar, and I need to know what you're doing because you look 31 years old. What's going on? Do you got some cream? You got your own product? Yeah.

I gotta get, I gotta get what you're on because you look like you don't eat. Well, you think you're very nice. You're very, very, very nice to say. I did start a skincare line. I did because people would ask me enough about it. And, you know, I've, I have always done things that guys don't like to do, like moisturize and put sunscreen on. So you can, it's called profile. You can, you can, it's sold around. It's, it's around. Um,

But mostly I'd say it's genetics. My dad is a freak of nature. I might one of my earliest memories of him is going to the county fairs back in Ohio where I was from and they had a guess your age or weight booth.

In those days, I don't think you can get away with that anymore. Oh, you're way fatter than I thought. You can imagine. I don't think there's no way there's a guess your age or weight booth in a county fair anymore. Well, you look like you're pushing 40, honey, whatever. But we used to go there and clean up. I remember my dad go up there. And so there's a little bit of that. And, you know, I, I, I, I eat Atkins style, you know, just protein, no carbs, but, but thank you. I mean, that's it.

All right. That seems simple enough. Apparently just got to eat a couple, couple pieces of salmon and use your cream. And, uh, I'm set, right? A lot of, a lot of, uh, what I like to call acting juice is just straight espresso. Um, with a little dollop of, uh,

No, you mentioned like acting juice in the forties. If I was Robert Mitchum, a little dollop of gin in it, but this is a action. What are you? Whoa. What was the, what do you got there? Just a little Herbamonte, uh, energy drink. I'm sure you're not drinking any of these. That's why, uh, I look my age energy drink.

I may have to get into that. Well, maybe. Just keep doing what you're doing, bro. You're so nice to say that. Did you got a big Robert fucking De Niro movie coming out that you wrote? Co-wrote. Co-wrote, yeah. So De Niro's playing my dad. It's based on my relationship with my father. It's basically like a love letter to my father. And when we wrote it, you know, De Niro wasn't...

Yeah. I didn't think we were going to get De Niro to play my father. It's not like we had him even in mind just because it was such a long shot, but ended up getting a script to him. I mean, he really enjoyed it. We ended up doing a table read with a bunch of actors and he's like, I love it. Let's do it. And I'm like, you gotta be kidding me. So let me ask you something. Cause it's funny guys of his ilk class time, Chino De Niro,

East New York actors, they the notion of the table read before them before they even decide to do the movie. Is that right? Is that what it was? Yeah. Yeah. Al does that. Chino like that doesn't it's so funny because that's such a New York actor of a certain thing. Like you never like Redford didn't do that. Newman didn't do that. Like it's just so it's so interesting. It makes perfect sense, by the way.

to get everybody together and feel like, is there a movie here? I mean, it's a really cool thing, but you'd think more people would do it, but they don't. I'm new to the movie game. So when he suggested that, I just thought, oh, okay, that's what people do. They want to hear it out loud. Yeah. But as I was talking to people, they're like, that's not really common. Yeah.

Yeah, it was cool to hear it out loud. Who were the other actors? I'm doing a horrible De Niro. I'm going to bring Billy. Billy's going to play Billy. How did you find the other actors for the table read? Oh, it was just like a casting director. Got some theater actors in the city. One of the guys, I forget his name. He's the tall kid in Succession.

Kind of like the dumb family. Alan Ruck? Nicholas Braun. Ooh, I like that. Cousin Greg. Well, that's a great... So you had hitters. You had really cool... That's cool. Yeah, yeah. We had a couple of great actors in that read. And then he wanted to spend time with my father, De Niro. He's like, I want to know your father. And I'm like, what? So...

My father went to Oklahoma to spend like a few days with De Niro. Now my father is 76 years old. He's still working as a hairstylist. And I told my father, I said, dad, De Niro wants to, you know, kind of study you. And my father's like,

I got appointments at the salon. I can't, I can't miss out on it. So, uh, my dad was worried about dye jobs and blowouts rather than, uh, you know, helping De Niro. But, uh, they spent, you know, a couple of days together and, uh, you know, De Niro was like, uh, how do you hold your cigar? How do you wear your hat?

Uh, he wanted to know everything about my father to incorporate it into the character in the movie. So wait, wait, that's, that's super interesting. So do you know the, some of the specifics, how, how do you hold the cigar? How do you hold your head? Do you know any of the other specifics he wanted to know? He wanted to know some Sicilian slang because there's some Sicilian in the movie and he wanted to know some phrases in Sicilian because my father grew up in Sicily. Um, yeah.

Yeah, just kind of getting to, I guess, absorb who my father was. Not that he was going to talk with an accent because my father has an accent, but I just think he wanted to learn how to do a dye job. My father had to teach him how to do the foil on the hair because there's a scene in the movie where De Niro's doing a dye job.

So we're on set and my father's teaching De Niro how to do hair. And I'm like, why? Like, this is a guy. I had a poster on my, on my wall and as a kid, and now he's playing my dad and my dad's teaching him a hairstyling tips. So for me, it was, uh, it was, it was kind of surreal to watch De Niro's process on the set.

What is I've heard so many stories like, you know, as actors, we everybody shares stories about so-and-so's process and the legends like, you know, De Niro, like what what did you notice anything? I know things you're new to the movie game. So you're thinking everything you're seeing is perfectly natural and everybody does it that way. But my guess is it's probably not because I've heard stories about De Niro's process that are pretty amazing. Did you notice anything about how he.

So I've done a handful of these movies, nothing where I was the star. I just would pop in and pop out for six days. But generally speaking, what I would do when I went to do a movie, I would hit my mark, say the lines, and that was that. By the way, that's pretty fucking good acting advice you just gave. That's what Clint Eastwood says. Well...

Hit your mark and you say they're your lines. That's literally what Clint says. That's his big thing. Is that right? Yeah. Okay. Well, maybe I'm halfway there. You're halfway there. De Niro was always concerned about what he called business. It's like, what am I doing in the scene? You know, like if he was packing, he was actually worried about, you know, would the jeans go here? Or do you think the shirt would go below the jeans? How would I pack? You know, like...

And I was like, wow, this guy's worried about where to, where to shit in his luggage is going to go. And, uh, I'm just worried that I memorized the line. You know, this guy's doing activity during the scenes. So, but in watching him, I kind of adapted that as well, because when you're doing something in the scene, it's just a lot more interesting to look at as a, as a viewer than someone just standing there shouting out lines, but.

And then, you know, people would ask me, what'd you guys do on set? Like, was he, you know, was he, you know, I go, basically they yelled cut. He went back to his chair and I think he opened up another notebook. You know, he was, he was like, exactly. He was like on the phone. He was like doing business, you know, like he had a lot of papers around him. Oh, really? He's one of those guys. Oh yeah, sure. Yeah.

There was no like, uh, Hey, uh, what are you doing this weekend? You know, there was, he was pretty, he wasn't like, I like the Yankees this year. I like the Yankees. There was none of that. No, no, no. He was, you know, I mean, there was moments of that, but you know, I just did a TV show for 10 weeks and the cast and I, you know, in between scenes, that's all we were doing was, you know, laughing and goofing around and making each other laugh. But with him, he was pretty off on his own little Island.

Two guys remind me that I work with Danny, the great Danny Glover and Edward James. Almost. They're both these gnarly political activists. And and we would be doing scenes and they'd be on the phone like pacing.

like in between every take and they'd always be on the phone with like a third world leader who was like under federal indictment trying to get them out of prison. Like that was their, De Niro's opening up a Nobu and guys like Danny Glover, like I'm going to call, you know, whatever, like the Red Cross and I'm going to get them down to Nicaragua and they're going to help you. It was, it's always funny to me what actors are doing, you know, in their spare time.

Well, I mean, speaking of, of a cast, you in the movie outsiders with all those guys, what was that? I mean, it's like a who's who of, of, of actors. Was that everybody having fun on that set? Or did you guys know each other prior to doing that? Um, I knew Emilio Estevez cause he lived three houses down from me. We're all living at home still.

And I knew this new kid from Jersey who was bunking with him named Tom Cruise. And he,

Uh, but that's it. Didn't know anybody else. And when we, we started the audition process, the, the, the audition process went on for months and I mean absolute months and months and months and you'd switch roles and Coppola would ask you to try this part and that part. And you ever knew you were, you would come in at nine o'clock in the morning to a soundstage and sit there with everybody else, everybody else.

And then you'd maybe leave at five o'clock at night and you would workshop all. It was insane. I've never even heard of anything like it since. So by the time we were done with that, we all knew each other really well. And then we went to New York and did the same thing with the quote unquote New York actors. And then so by the time we got to Tulsa where we shot Oklahoma, we were all like homies. And, you know, it was like it was like going off to college. I was 17. I turned 18 on the set.

And it was like the first time I ever did my own laundry. You know, it's like all those firsts you have when you, when you're a freshman in a dorm, I had there. And so we were bonded for life. All of us guys, it's like growing the same fraternity basically. Yeah. Wow. Swayze. They were all, everybody had their things they were into. It's like, you know, who was into what, you know, um, Amelia was into like, um, he was like the first prepper.

It was always like prepping for doomsday all the time. I remember he had this insane like metal rollout chain link ladder in case the hotel caught on fire. He had that under his bed, which always made me laugh. And Tom always wanted to go to the Nautilus. I don't know if that's before your time. The Nautilus. It was like the very first gym. Do you remember those gyms? Oh, yeah.

It was like my mom belonged to one. How great is that? The Nautilus. And going back and looking at those pieces of equipment, they're so barbaric and rudimentary of it. And there were like five of them. And you'd like work your way through it in 15 minutes and be done. So that was I just remember there was one Nautilus in and we would have to take a cab like 45 minutes to get there.

Um, yes, every, and then Swayze just wrote songs all night, stayed up all night, never slept and, and wrote songs and eventually got a number one hit out of it. She's like the wind paid off. I'm surprised that Nautilus made it down to Oklahoma. Me too.

It was definitely the most forward thinking part of, of Oklahoma in those days. It was, and there was not much going on in Tulsa. Although we had fun, man. We, it was, it remains, I mean, think of it. It's, you know, how many, 10, you know, 19 to 23 year old dudes running a muck. I mean, a muck and Coppola at the height of his powers, you know, it was, it was insane. Yeah.

It was super crazy. And we had all these people, weird people would visit the set. I'm like the grateful, like Mickey Weir from the Grateful Dead came by and Tom Waits. And it was all this kind of weird San Francisco rock and roll type people. Stuart Copeland was there because he was from the police because he was going to do Rumblefish's soundtrack. So it was kind of, it was very glamorous, I have to say, looking back on it. ♪

All set for your flight? Yep. I've got everything I need. Eye mask, neck pillow, T-Mobile, headphones. Wait, T-Mobile? You bet. Free in-flight Wi-Fi. 15% off all Hilton brands. I'll never go anywhere without T-Mobile. Same goes for my water bottle, chewing gum, nail clippers, passport. Okay, I'm going to leave you to it. Find out how you can experience travel better at T-Mobile.com slash travel. ♪

I want to know what it was like for you coming out from, you're from Illinois, is that right? Yeah, yeah. Chicago. Were you in the suburbs of Chicago City? Whereabouts in Chicago?

Yeah, Arlington Heights. So it's about northwest from the city. Yeah, totally. So when we were doing all the Chicago movies in the 80s, was that on your radar at all? Because I felt like that's all we did was movies in Chicago there for that 10-year period. Yeah, I mean, John Hughes was from Chicago, and I was aware of those movies. I just didn't know I was going to get into the entertainment business then.

Uh, that, that early on, um, you know, I, I, I looked at Hollywood back when I was a kid and I was like, where is that place? You know, like I felt like it was just a place where no one really had access to the entertainment world seemed like a fantasy to me.

Uh, but I really always enjoyed making people laugh and whatnot. And I always liked comedy. I just didn't even know how about, how do you get into that? Like, what do you do? You know, how do you, how do you meet these people? But, uh, yeah, I wasn't highly aware of what was going on in the entertainment world in the Chicagoland area until kind of later on in life. Yeah, that makes sense. Uh, it was such a hotbed, such a hotbed. I mean,

It was like Risky Business was there. Every John Hughes movie. I did a couple movies there and then it kind of had its moment. And obviously they still shoot things there, but it's nothing like it was in the day. I'm fascinated with people who come to LA to follow their dreams. It's cliche, but it's true. Everybody does it. At some point you have to. If you want to make it, you got to go where they're making it.

So that's New York or here. And you're working at the Four Seasons waiter.

Did you see some good shit? You must have. You must have seen some good shit. I started working there in 1998, and the Four Seasons at that time was the hub of all press junkets. So you got a lot of Hollywood types who were running through that hotel. And then I was working in the bar, the Windows Lounge. Oh, yes. And... Yeah.

Between 98 and 2005. So it was like the place to be. Like, I mean, you know, it was, you know, breakfast was big there in the gardens restaurant. I know a lot of heavy hitters were in there during the morning and at night it was like, come to the lounge, you get yourself some appetizers, some drinks. And I was like in the midst of all that, uh, or

For seven years. Have you ever accessed any of that? You must have seen insane. Like, I just love the notion of you there. Like go back in a time machine, something I, that's the next project I want you to develop for me as an audience member, something around that.

My, my years, uh, waiting tables at the four seasons. I mean, listen, I waited on every celebrity that, that you could imagine. I mean, I waited on Robert De Niro in what, 2002. And next thing you know, he's playing my father. Jesus. Uh, just a lot of people that I've worked with. I waited on.

Vince Vaughn. You know, I remember him coming in one night and then, uh, we did some Wild West comedy show together for a month, went on the road with him. So yeah, it was pretty surreal to be, you know, basically coming from Arlington Heights, Illinois, and then boom being, being, you know, thrust into the four seasons and,

you know, waiting on Sylvester Stallone. It was, it was pretty crazy. And, uh, and what happened at that time there was just, you know, the four seasons, that's a high standard for hospitality, uh,

And everybody that came in there was, you know, not everybody, but a lot of people were like particular about what they wanted. You know, I remember one woman coming in and she was complaining about the thickness of the wine glass. It was resting on her lips a little too heavy. And did we have another wine glass? You know, and here I am fresh out of Chicago going, what? Wine glass? You know, like, so I had to adjust my, uh,

My, uh, level of, um, I had to be a little bit more patient with people than I normally was, uh, prior to working there. But actually looking back on that experience, I wish I was a better waiter than I was. I didn't put like, I didn't put a hundred percent into it. Obviously I was, I was doing comedy on my breaks. You know, I would, I would run to the comedy store and,

and do a set and then, and then come back and, and pick up my section again. So I was concentrated more on, on standup than learning, um,

What was in the special that the chef was making that night? You know what I'm saying? But now, you know, when you go out to restaurants and I, and I watch waiters and how they are, I'm like, oh, wow. I wish I would have been a little bit more knowledgeable about scotches or, or tequila or wines back then. I could have suggested a lot more and been a better waiter. But at the time, you know, I was just,

I was just frustrated that I had to wait on these demanding people. It wasn't overly...

fun for me. I mean, it was a fun environment to work in, but also it was a little, a little, uh, stressful dealing with the, the, the demands of the, the rich and famous. I would, again, I want to see this movie. I want to see it. I want to just chapters in a book, whatever it is. I just, I just love the notion of you hustling down that Hill from sunset strip to get to your, get to your next time on the floor.

You know what's funny is when did every server have to use the phrase, are you still enjoying that? The way it was described to me was it's a polite way of saying,

You're done? Yes. Go up to the table and that's what you say. Yeah. We'd like to turn the table over. It's just really funny that like phraseology, whether it's corporate speak, right? And there's all kinds of, well, the thing that's top of mind today is whatever. Like I just love talking

that kind of bullshit where you're like, all of a sudden everybody has just decided to use phrases overnight, overnight, and everybody uses it. You still enjoying that? Yeah, I'm still enjoying it. It used to be just like, would you like me to take that away? You hear that. Or you'd hear, are you finished? Or how did you like that? Or there's, it's like a memo went out across the universe to every server. Yeah.

What is top of mind today is, are you still enjoying that? You forget this one? Pardon my reach. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Yes. Oh my God. I knew there was another one. I knew it. And that's it. When did that happen? Pardon my reach.

Pardon my reach. Yeah, that was a bit. Someone said that to me. I was like, what? I thought it was just, excuse me. Yeah, excuse me. Sorry about that. Hey, can I just? Oh, sorry. Pardon my reach. Where was that in seventh grade when I was at the movies with Kate Poole watching a remake of The Champ? Pardon my reach.

Oh, God. I know we're missing a few others that are integrated into the hospitality world, but yeah, pardon my reach, and you're still enjoying that. It seems to be top of mind. For sure. There's nothing in Canada they do. My brother hipped me to this. It seems that it's only, it hasn't migrated from Vancouver yet, but they, after they've

cleared the table they hit you with so what are your plans for this evening and we used to think it was like oh it's on right and but but it isn't what what we after a lot of like talking to people going what is that about it's like the first time it happens you go okay and then the second time you go oh that's so weird that just happened and then the third time like okay everybody's doing this bit what what is this what are your plans for this evening

And then you find yourself like an idiot. Well, I was thinking about walking home and then I was like, why am I explaining what I'm about to go do for the rest of the night now? What's happening? And what I realized what it is, is is someone is trained like whoever trains the folks is like make a personal connection with your customer.

If you want a better tip. You think it's that up in Canada? I mean, just Canadians are just generally sweet people anyway, so maybe they're generally sweet. They are for sure, but it's the exact same language. It's never like, hey, I like your shirt, or how long you... It's the same... What do you got planned for later today? It's like, are they working for the Chamber of Commerce? Is there like a...

Is there an idea? Is it, is like, they're going to be, cause you know, we have five tickets for sale. Is there, is there going to be a punchline? No, there's no pun. It's so interesting. Next time you're up there, see if you get that one. All right. I'll keep my ears open. This is why people come to this podcast for interesting titillating information. Pay attention to what your servers. That's just top of mind for our viewer, our listeners.

Oh, I want to know about the Vince Vaughn comedy Monsters of Monsters. So you did this tour with Vince, 30 shows in 30 days or something. What prompted Vince to do that? That's such a cool idea. It was great. It literally got me out of the Four Seasons. That was kind of like the springboard for quitting waiting tables. So this happened in 2005.

I don't know if you were around the LA area, Hollywood area in 2000, I'd say 2003, 2004. There was a place called Dublin's on Sunset. It was an Irish bar that had comedy night. And it was the hottest comedy show ever.

in the city on Tuesday nights. And, uh, a lot of celebrities used to go there. And at the time I would pop in and out of there doing sets. And Vince Vaughn was there along with, uh, another comedian by the name of Ahmed Ahmed, who, uh, Vince knew really well. And Vince wanted to take a road show, uh,

to places where generally they don't get a lot of live entertainment. So he came up with this concept, Vince Vaughn's Wild West Comedy Show, 30 cities and 30 nights. And we got on a tour bus basically, and for a month bounced around, you know, and we went from LA to Chicago. Chicago was the last stop.

doing theaters with vince vaughn emceeing once in a while you know we'd have a special we've got favaro i think started off the tour in los angeles with us we'd have a kiro donald poppin uh we would have justin long you know just guys that kind of vince knew that would do some sketches on stage and then we would provide this the comedy made a documentary about it it aired in 2008 and uh

And, you know, of course I thought this was it, you know, like a documentary coming out in theaters. That's it. I'm on the map and nobody shot. So, uh, it, it went to video and it kind of had a life on, uh, on, on video, but it wasn't top of mind for, for a lot of people, not top of mind at all, at all. Uh, and, uh, but, but it did get, they were not done enjoying it yet. They were not.

We're going to, we're going to weave these waiting table, uh, little, little phrases throughout the. Yeah. I'm going to do it for the rest of the day. I don't know about you.

So, yeah. And then, uh, and it basically started doing clubs out of that. I, I started doing comedy clubs because it gave me a little name recognition where I could, you know, go into a club in Addison, Texas and, uh, and, and sell some tickets. So, uh, yeah, that was, uh, that was a blast. It was, it was hanging out similar to your story with the, you know, the outsiders hanging out, you know, five, six guys on a tour bus going from city to city and,

and having a blast doing what you love to do. And yeah, that was a pretty great experience. And Vince was great. He was really, really cool to be around. Always kind of laughing and goofing around. Yeah, he's super funny. Do you find...

different jokes, the different comic sensibilities in different parts of the country? Yeah. I generally stay to what I do, whether I'm in Montana or I'm in Miami. Uh, you know, the act is the act. Yeah. Of course, if it's, you know, a place like maybe New York city, uh,

A lot of Italians at the show. I might Italian it up a little bit and incorporate a lot more kind of cultural material into my set than I would in Montana. But generally speaking, I find that no matter where you are in the country, my comedy seems to resonate just because

It's very observational, kind of everyday stuff, you know, talking about my dad, which a lot of people relate to. You have to be Italian to understand the relationship I have with my father. You know, he could come from any walk of life.

And then the rest of the materials, you know, pretty much, Hey, I went to that, that, that, and this happened. Uh, now I have kids, I have a six year old and a three year old. I'm talking about a little bit more parenting and, and, uh, going to school and interacting with parents at school and giving my spin on that. So yeah, it's kind of everyday slice of life type stuff. So I don't really have to adjust much. Uh, when I, when I go, I mean,

I went to the middle East in 2008 and I was performing in Saudi Arabia doing material. I was doing that, the Dublin's, uh, on sunset Boulevard. And then people were laughing. So,

you know, it doesn't really matter where you go. I think, um, I think people have a sense of humor and, uh, yeah, I mean, I wasn't talking about going to the Chipotle and in Jeddah. Yeah. But, uh, yeah. But like, you know, family is family. Family is family. How often do you change the material? You go, okay. I mean, I've had this conversation with, with comics and, and it's fascinating to me. You have, you have the hits, you have the stuff that's murdered for you forever. Yeah.

And like, why would you retire it? And yet there are other people like, no, I never want to tell that joke again. Everybody seems to come at that differently in terms of when it's time to freshen it. Yeah, I think once it comes out on a Netflix special or HBO special and people have seen it and then they're going to buy a ticket and come see you live.

The notion is the hell did I buy a ticket to see the same stuff I just saw on Netflix? So that's kind of like,

the business behind standup comedy where you kind of want to give people a fresh look at what you're doing. Um, because what I, what I've often compared these special to is like a commercial to come and see me. Right. Right. So if you like what you saw on the special, I got more of that than you haven't seen yet. Right. Uh, but it's hard, you know, it's hard to continuously write material that's either equal to or greater than, uh,

what you just had on your last Netflix special. So this is the first time I've actually taken a large amount of time off because you're not, or at least for me, I'm not gaining material

Flying around from city to city, it's basically the same thing. Airplane, airport, hotel, show. I got to, you know, I got to take my kids to Universal Studios and spend a day there to extract, you know, material from life. So I've taken a year and a half off of doing a major tour and just concentrating on other things.

and spending some time with my family and enjoying life a little bit. So I could not only enjoy the life of my family, but also, you know, that's where you get a lot of material from. How often do you write? Do you have a process or do you just go, oh, that's funny, I'm going to make a note of that and it happens more organically? Is there any structure to it? No, I don't sit in a room and write jokes. It's not really my style. I kind of live...

Like tonight I'm going to the improv in Hollywood and there's a couple of things that I want to talk about. I haven't done comedy in 10 weeks because I was doing this TV thing, but I got some things that have happened in my life that I want to present tonight on stage. And it'd be like, you know, the way I describe it, it's like, let's say something happens to you.

Today, when you're going to get your espresso at the coffee place and then you come home, you tell your wife or you tell whoever, a friend of yours, guess what happened to me? And you don't write the story down. You're just telling it from memory. Well, that's kind of what I do. I just regurgitate the experience that I just lived. And I do it on stage, but I have a point of view and a funny spin on it. So.

Yeah, I don't know. I mean, I'm just not that comedian that's going to sit there and go, okay, I'm going to talk about the U.S. Postal Service. What's funny about that? No, I got to go to the post office, deal with the person behind the desk, and then go, what the fuck is this person? So I tend to extract from living these moments, not necessarily pen to paper.

All set for your flight? Yep. I've got everything I need. Eye mask, neck pillow, T-Mobile, headphones. Wait, T-Mobile? You bet. Free in-flight Wi-Fi. 15% off all Hilton brands. I never go anywhere without T-Mobile. Same goes for my water bottle, chewing gum, nail clippers, passport. Okay, I'm going to leave you to it. Find out how you can experience travel better at T-Mobile.com slash travel. ♪

How much do you hone the story? You know, get it cleaner, tighter, more concise? Because if you're just

If you're just telling it, you have a freedom to really tell it any way you want. But you also know that there's always one version that is the most concise killer version of. Yeah. So I'll record the set tonight and then I'll listen to it on the way home in the car.

And I'll go, okay, nice flow. Or maybe we take out that. Or then I start remembering just by listening to it. I start remembering other things that happened in the experience. Okay. I forgot about that. I'll remember to say that tomorrow. Uh, but generally speaking, the story, the original story that I tell is the funniest version of that story.

Yeah, there's going to be some massaging, but generally speaking, if I tell you a story, the story I'm telling is the joke. I have a one-man show that I do, and COVID knocked that away, obviously. But I'm kind of back to doing it just because I enjoy the discipline of it. And movies and TV are so collaborative, which is great. But every once in a while, you want to be out there on your own and just to see what you got. And I think...

I you're right. I should record it. I should just record it just to, just to help me with it. It's fun. I mean, it's been, it's been going great. I'm, you know, it's like the third time I played Vegas and it's super fun. Just the notion I've played Vegas makes me sound like I'm important. It makes me sound like I'm, you know, really getting something done. But, uh,

I always pick people's brains like yours to see what I can learn, but it's so obvious. Of course, record it, you dummy. Record it. In that case, maybe even a video, if you can video record even the movements on stage, where you are, when you say a particular line, are you sitting, are you standing, and what feels natural for you. I find with video sometimes...

uh although it's not always accessible um although today you know everybody's got a video you got a video guy that that follows you around it seems to be yes seems to be a uh a prerequisite now to be an entertainer you've got to populate your entire team with like an editor a video guy a photographer i show up places i feel naked i don't got anybody you know i'm

I show up and they're like, that's it? You know, like if I, if someone, if I was in studio with you, I come alone, right? There's nobody else. Me too. But there's people, there's people that come with like boom mics, lights, you know, it's like they're making a, they're making a movie. Now wait, are those, but I bet you those people are influencers. Some of them are influencers. Yes. But I know a lot of comedians that travel with a team that,

Of people like my, my friend Bert Kreischer, he's got a video guy with him. They're editing on the fly. They're doing this, they're doing that. And I'm like, for what? For online, social, you know, social media, like people want to know what he's doing, the behind the scenes, this, that, and the other thing. And I'm thinking I, I could barely get myself there, let alone 13 people, uh,

coming to a show with me but uh yeah no i this is a this is a whole different era of entertainment and and what you need to to have around you i mean it's like how much harder do they want it to be it's a lot of work man

Hey, content, man, you got to get the content out there. I'm just thinking, you know, is there some more, it's some sort of organic. Oh, that's another one. When they hit you with organic content. That's my favorite. It's really organic to film every fucking thing you do. That's, that's organic for you. That's the way it's been going on for thousands of years. Can't be more organic than that. That's organic content. But I also want to say to him, you mean free, right? You mean like I do it for free for you. Yeah.

What you mean? Right. Or authentic. It's gotta be authentic. You gotta be better. Yeah. Oh, I think authentic organic. Well, you know, it, that famous philosophical phrase, if a tree falls in the forest and there's no one there to see it, did it really fall? You know, that, that old saw, they say it would now be, you know, if, if, you know, if an influencer, you know, um,

walks a red carpet and there's no one to take a selfie, did they really walk the red carpet? That would be the new version. Are you excited to go to the Met Gala sometime, Sebastian? I've never been to a Met Gala. Have you? No, never have. There are a couple of things that I would be okay going through my whole life not doing. I never wanted to go to a Planet Hollywood when those were a thing, and I managed to avoid that. And I got to be honest, don't think I really want to

So Jared Leto wore a rabbit suit, literally a suit of a rabbit to the Met Gala. And of course, then you have to take the hat off and go, it's me, it's Jared Leto underneath it. My question is, let's say you get invited next year to the Met Gala. With the invitation, do they say, listen, you're invited, but you got to wear a rabbit suit? Or do you get invited and then you go...

Who's got a rabbit suit I could put on for this thing? Like, are they being told what to wear or are they going out and shopping for it?

I do wonder, and I know it's a whole different thing for women and the men have finally figured it out. This year, it seems like they figured it out because they realize you schlep all the way there and everybody's in a tuxedo. So nobody takes that photo or cares because everybody kind of looks alike and it's all about the ladies, which it should be. That's fashion. So I've known big stars who go schlep all the way there and they're like, for what? Nobody even knew I was there. So this year it's rabbit suits.

Everybody knows it. We're talking about him. We're talking about him in a rabbit suit. I once dressed up as a Sasquatch for my kids. I took them camping and I had always told them about Bigfoot and this and like, you know, spooky stories at bedtime. And we were going to the Pacific Northwest where Bigfoot supposedly lives. And I was like, I know.

I'm going to go to Western costume and get the most bad ass Bigfoot costume, like full on Harry and the Hendersons, like real legit. And then fuck with them. Like we'll get up there at the campsite and I'll be like, oh, I think I heard something. Oh my God, did you guys hear that? Hang on, stay here. I'm going to go check it out. Then scamper away, put the suit on and walk through the moonlight. And I did it. And it was dope. And it was traumatizing for them. One of the kids threw up.

And the other kid ran up to me and kicked me in the nuts. Wow. And I thought, well, I go, I like that. My kid's tough. So maybe if I were to go to the Met, I just reconstitute the Bigfoot suit and do the walk with the fucking arms, like, you know, the famous walk down the red carpet. I think you're onto something. That's not a terrible idea.

Yeah. I'm, I'm, I see you in a Sasquatch suit next year at the gala. I'm going to go, wow, this guy's got a set of balls. I mean, it would, uh, it would be something. They would definitely buried a rabbit that we saw this year. Yeah. I can, with those long arms, I could use the phrase, pardon my reach. And that ladies and gentlemen is our podcast. Um, dude, this is super funny. I'm, I'm psyched to see the movie.

Um, I just love the picture. The one sheet I'm looking at now, granted you're on a zoom. You're the, the, the monitor I'm looking at is a good 10 feet away from me. It, your dad looks like, is there a Danny DeVito thing? Is what is, is what's hat does dead guys. Doesn't it look like Danny DeVito behind us? Yeah, no, it's the narrow.

So the De Niro morphin. Oh, he's sitting. Is he sitting on a chair right now? Yeah. In it? Oh, that's what it is. It looks like he's, to me, it looks like he's standing. Yes. Because you're blocking the chair. No, it's, uh, he's sitting in a bar. Oh, now I get it. Oh yeah. Well, it's, it's Robert De Niro in a chair. Oh yeah, sure. When you, when, when, when you actually look at it that close, it's Robert De Niro in a chair. But if you want to do an optical joke, just walk away, put one hand over and it's,

Danny, it's the altar. It'd be the version. If you didn't get to near and had, you wanted a guy with a D in the name and you got to veto instead. The beret kind of thing. It's a hat. It's like a brim pad. You can't, you can't see anything. It is. Yeah. I can't see shit. I can't. And you, and frankly, you look like Will Arnett. If I want to be totally honest. Danny DeVito and about my father. That's this. Yeah.

It really does. Tell me, does that not look like Will Arnett and Danny DeVito's new movie? Yeah, everybody's shaking their head. I never really thought about it. Well, you better rethink this now because now the billboard is on sunset. People aren't up close to that. They're just driving by. What about the thought that everybody thinks it's Will Arnett and Danny DeVito now? And then they're completely thrown by your name up there. They're like, what the fuck? Wait a minute. Sebastian's in it too?

If it's good, it's the things you don't think about, man. If it's going to sell thick, it's pro tip. Why not? You know, that's right. It doesn't matter as long as they get in there. You want those points, baby got a pool to build. You got a, you got a pickleball court. You're looking to put in. Come on, baby. That back end. This does well, man. This, this movie does well. Pickleball courts all over the property.

pickleball for everyone as Christopher Walken would say this is super fun man thank you for this it was really great I appreciate you having me on and uh I got my own podcast over here I know you're uh you're out and you don't really do this uh

Out of Los Angeles, but maybe we could get you on and we'll talk about more waiting tips. We'll do the things that drive us fucking crazy. We'll do a whole podcast on things that drive us insane. I have a list of resentments always. Don't worry about that. I think we all do. All right, man. Thank you. It was so fun. Take care. Good luck with the movie, man. I'm psyched. I can't wait to see it. I appreciate it. Thank you.

Ladies and gentlemen, the great Sebastian Maniscalco. That was fun. Super fun dude. I wish I had run up against him back in the days at the waiting tables, the Four Seasons. Super sweetheart. Super funny. About my father. May 26th. In theaters. And it isn't with Danny DeVito. It's Robert De Niro. I love me some Danny DeVito. Or as they say, Bob De Niro. That's what the cool kids call him.

All right. You got questions? I got answers. Let's hit the lowdown line. Hello. You've reached literally in our lowdown line where you can get the lowdown on all things about me, Rob Lowe. 323-570-4551. So have at it. Here's the beep. Beep.

Hey Rob, this is Marci Warhatch calling from Toronto, Canada. My question is, today in the conversation with German Moroni, you guys talked about how sometimes when you watch the young and up-and-comers, it's hard not to kind of covet the roles that they're getting and think you could have smashed it. So, my question is, for fun, if you could morph yourself back to the 22-year-old version of yourself and pick a role from any film

or TV show from the last 10 years that you think you could just kill, what would that be? So what role would 22-year-old Rob Lowe want to play now? Or let's say, again, an amazing role from the last 10 years that you think you could kill? Thanks. That's a really good question. Thank you. It's funny. There's nothing both more inspiring and depressing.

at the same time than to see a role and go, I would have crushed that. And, and, and happily it doesn't happen often because usually that actor is so good in it that you can't imagine anybody else in it. Um, where that really happens for me is when I read a script. So before I've seen another actor crush it and, and, you know, I want that part and don't get it. Um, but,

For me, without a doubt, hands down, like, if I could do, if I could have played Jerry Maguire, and Tom's amazing at it. I love Tom. I think he's the world's biggest movie star, but I think he's a criminally underrated actor. And Jerry Maguire is...

He's so good in it. I don't in any way feel like I'd be better than Tom, but I know I would have had a killer Jerry Maguire in me. So that would be the one. Thanks. That was a great question. Thanks for listening, you guys. Next week, more to come on Literally. Don't forget to spread the word. Download the stuff. Send it over to your pals and say, this is worth listening to. If you feel like it's worth listening to. I think it's worth doing.

That's why I do it. All right, y'all. See you next week. Thank you. Bye. You've been listening to Literally with Rob Lowe, produced by me, Nick Liao, with help from associate producer Sarah Begar, researched by Alyssa Grahl. The podcast is executive produced by Rob Lowe for Low Profile, Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross and myself at Team Coco, and Colin Anderson at Stitcher. Booking by Deirdre Dodd. Music by Devin Bryant. Thanks for listening. We'll see you next time on Literally with Rob Lowe.

This has been a Team Coco production. All set for your flight? Yep. I've got everything I need. Eye mask, neck pillow, T-Mobile, headphones. Wait, T-Mobile? You bet. Free in-flight Wi-Fi. 15% off all Hilton brands. I never go anywhere without T-Mobile. Same goes for my water bottle, chewing gum, nail clippers. Okay, I'm going to leave you to it. Find out how you can experience travel better at T-Mobile.com slash travel.

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