Chat Among Friends 💬 #356
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This is Rock and Roll English. Real people, real English. Here's your host, Martin Johnson. Hello everyone and welcome to another episode of Rock and Roll English, episode number 356. Yes, we are back on track with the numbers. Now, so in today's episode, we speak to Champagne Char. Yes, she is back.

And we talk about, well, we were supposed to talk about social awkward things, but then we started talking about digital things. Now, this, by the way, is what I love about Rock and Roll English is that conversations just can go in any direction. So basically, you're just listening to two friends having a bit of a chat, which, in my opinion, is the essence of what Rock and Roll English is. So that's it. I will talk to you at the end for the vocab recap. Happy listening.

Champagne Char, how are you today? Hello, I'm very well. How are you? Always fantastic, Char. Always fantastic. We got through those initial technical problems, although you told me 10% battery in your headphones. You think that's going to last this podcast? Well, it needs to last because I can't reach the plugs. It bloody needs to. If the podcast just suddenly stops people, you know why. Champagne Char's

Bluetooth headphones have run out of battery. But yes. Okay. So on to today's show, I would ask you if we have a review. That's normally how we start, but the review thing has been so bad recently. I just feel too embarrassed to keep asking people. And then, because it does hurt me when I say, do you think we have a review and people say yes, and then I have to say no. So I don't really want to go through that again. That's upsetting. I could see your face there, Shai. You didn't make the sound, but it was very much the...

That's the kind of vibe I was going for, to play the guilt trip on people, to make them feel guilty so then they leave a review. Could you do it the other way? Could you leave an incentive for a review? Yes.

Like, monetary. I'm not made of money, Sian. I can't pay people to leave reviews. If I could, I would. Not monetary. Surely that's fraud. A thumbs-up poster. Not poster. No one wants a poster. A thumbs-up photo or a soundbite from you. Hmm.

Yeah, because we said the word incentive. I don't know if a soundbite from me would be an incentive. I could send people photos of my very sexy, skinny, hairy body. That would be... That could be another incentive. Again, did we not say incentive? Yeah, I haven't got much to offer. It's my problem. So...

Yeah, unfortunately, I don't think so. But if anyone thinks of an incentive, please let me know. Or the easiest thing, just leave a review. Easiest thing to do. There is that. Also that. And it doesn't cost you anything. Exactly. It's free. So on to today's pod where we do have a bit of a theme, but also not. I've just got lots of random questions. The first one was, again, went on to chat GPT because we only kind of agreed to do this quite late yesterday.

And I said, can you write me 20 questions about social awkwardness? Okay. And so I've got some questions and we can discuss them. Okay. So number one, do you actually ever want to share food at a restaurant? Because, you know, you go to a restaurant and people like...

The classic thing, Mrs. R&R always says this to me, especially in Italy, go to a pizzeria and then she says, we'll get two pizzas. You get half and I'll get another half. Now, my thought is, no, you get whatever you fucking want and I'll get what I want. Don't eat my food and I'm not going to eat yours. What are your thoughts?

Well, if I'm going out to a restaurant, it's normally with my husband and my son. My son eats beige food and my husband is vegan. So I don't want to be sharing either of their meals. Wow, that's quite a combination then, isn't it? Cooking must be fun.

Yeah, no, it's really not. We actually found Italy to be the easiest place because my husband just ate the marinara pizza. Okay. And my son just ate the margarita. Right. And then I had whatever I wanted. And what's your go-to pizza then? What?

See, the fact that you haven't responded tells me something about you, right? Because this is the same as Mrs. R&R. If you get...

And she knows, right? If she's ordering a pizza, I want a pepperoni pizza, which is what we say in English, by the way. Just FYI, pepperoni in Italian means peppers. And the first time I was in Italy, I thought pepperoni, that sounds Italian, pizza. So I went in there and went pepperoni pizza and then got a pizza with peppers on and I was fucking fuming. Yeah.

See, that would suit me perfectly. Right. Okay. Yeah. I like peppers, onions, any sort of veg. But so the thing with this, when I asked someone that question, what's your go-to pizza? And they don't have an answer for me. That for me is a red flag because like I said, this is exactly the same with Mrs. R&R because...

For example, I will go to the supermarket and maybe buy some pizzas or because pizzas are expensive in the UK, we have to buy them from a supermarket. We're too poor to actually order pizzas from somewhere, which or even when we're in Italy, I'd go to the like get a takeaway pizza. So what do you want? Just get me anything. I'll be happy with anything. Oh,

come home she won't be happy with the pizza no so never never you never say i'll be happy with exactly and it it drives me mental whilst if if the shoe is on the other foot if she's going there she knows she's getting me a pepperoni pizza i'll be happy okay but it whatever pizza i get is never good enough i was in the supermarket the other day it's actually i wasn't expecting to talk about this and

And she said to me, get me a pizza. I think she said with mushrooms. So I took a picture of a pizza which had some mushrooms on and she said, is there another one? So then there was another pizza with mushrooms on and she said, is there another one? And then I said there was only one more type of pizza, which was a pepperoni pizza. So I sent her that one and she responded, that would be perfect for you. And I responded, what do you fucking want? I know what's good for me.

Honestly, I was in the supermarket. Fucking steam was coming out of my ears. Do you know what? Go and buy your own pizza. Exactly. This is what I mean. So, yeah, the fact that you don't have a go-to pizza makes me think you are like that as well, Shah. You know, I'm happy with anything. I like everything. Just get me whatever. So you get whatever. Is that all they had?

No, see, I'm almost the opposite. I'm not happy with anything. And so it takes me ages to make a decision. If we're going to a new restaurant, I have to have seen the menu at least three days in advance. Oh, my God. I'm getting annoyed just even thinking about this. This is why I don't go out very much. This is, to be fair, is also why I stopped watching and cancelled Netflix because you're there, you're thinking, right,

kids are in bed Saturday night let's watch a film half an hour discussion googling looking at reviews and then you think it's too late now I'm going to bed yeah and then you put it on 10 minutes later you're watching your phone anyway exactly yeah so there's literally no point to it

But okay, what about this one? You've actually just made a perfect transition by mentioning phones. Okay, total was not planned. If someone shows you something on their phone, so you know the classic, oh, you've got to see this video or you've got to see this photo. How long is too long to show you?

Well, for the video, how long is the video? Because, you know, someone might do that sometimes and it's like a three-minute video. No. And you're like, this is... Stop. Yeah. 20 seconds, 30 seconds tops. At an absolute push. I totally agree. But then it's that thing there, isn't it? If it's something you know that they're really interested in and you're thinking...

Send it to me. Yeah, I agree. Think of that as well, actually. I had this once of when I was in Italy and went to this family's house and we're talking about like weddings and they were probably about 20 years older than me and Mrs. R&R.

And then we were talking about weddings. I think maybe we were just about to get married or just got married. And it ended up them talking about wedding videos. And they said, oh, we'll show you our wedding video. My God. My God. And if you want to show me a wedding video, show me the highlights. Because we're watching a video of the church service. Now, when you go to a wedding, everyone knows.

The church is, you've got like the priest making like a reading just there. Oh, this is, this is brilliant. I would like, this is, couldn't think of anything better to do on a Saturday afternoon. Not even be in church to watch a video of a priest in church. Why would anyone think that was a good idea to share? My wedding video, actually, I, we had it on USB. I'm pretty sure we've lost that.

Don't have a coffee. Did you get a wedding video, Char? No. No? We didn't even have a photographer. Okay. You came to my wedding. It was more of a party, wasn't it? I was just thinking when you photos your wedding. And there's definitely one photo of me with my tie tied around my head like Rambo. There it is.

That made the album. Yeah. Oh, that was a mad party. Yeah. And the best thing about that. Okay. Maybe not. I don't want to say the best thing, but a great thing was the DJ was very cooperative. So normally when I, you know, you get drunk, you sort of ask him for requests and the DJ doesn't play them. He was playing all of them. And,

Oh, yeah, some of the tunes coming on. It was outrageous. So, yeah, he was brilliant. He wasn't a wedding DJ. Right. He was actually a professional DJ from Ibiza. Right, okay. Who just happened to know the owner of the venue. Right. And, yeah, it was rather a bizarre turn of events. Yeah.

He cost us more than the food. Right. Wow. Well, I mean, that was the best thing. So that was money well spent, Char. It was. Money well spent on a DJ coming straight from Ibiza. I've never been to Ibiza, but I thought I was there. I must admit, I had lost the plot. By the way, do you know how, so we say that almost with like a TH sound, Ibiza, right?

Well, it's supposed to have a TH sound, but lots of people just say like bifa. People actually call it bifa in the UK. Like Spanish people just can't believe that. I think the Spanish way is ibiza, something like that. And English people call it bifa with an F.

We are so close. Oh, yeah. No, because there's that song, isn't there? Ooh, we're going to Ibiza. I forgot about that. That was an absolute tune, wasn't it? Wasn't that the Venga Boys? It was. We are going to Ibiza for our summer holiday this year. Right. So we regularly sing, ooh, we're going to Ibiza.

In Ibiza. Because as I said earlier, they're the only meals we can eat in a restaurant. We're going to eat pizza in Ibiza. Okay, works well. In Ibiza. Works well.

I've just got me thinking about the Venga Boys now. The Venga Boys are coming and everybody's jumping. New York to San Francisco. Oh, my God. What a tune that is. We're having it already just here. OK, so on to these. We have actually moved to a more digital thing talking about music.

a few things like phones etc so i have got a few digital questions as well actually so for example alexa do you have an alexa in your house i do yes do you use alexa i do and i'm incredibly lazy i have one in the kitchen and i have one in my son's bedroom because we're in a townhouse okay and i am not climbing three flights of stairs to tell him dinner is ready

So you talk to him on the Alexa? Yes. Oh, wow. See, I thought everyone just uses Alexa for a timer. Is that... Yes. Like what other things do you... Like you pay all this money for a timer, basically. So, yeah, we use it to talk and I play music through it. Right. Yeah. Or...

Like if we're discussing something, I'll use that as a Google device rather than... Like what's the weather like tomorrow? Yeah. Yeah. So we've got an Alexa as well. Now our Alexa has been programmed to speak in English and Italian. Oh, clever. And for some reason it seems to have stopped speaking English now, which is annoying. And then I think...

Can Alexas like lose the plot and start going crazy? Because I think my Alexa has lost it. And you think like what day of the week it is. It's like Monday. And then Alexa says it's like fucking Thursday. Don't speak too loudly, she'll hear you. Yeah, it's a good point. And then Mrs. R&R's sister came around and programmed it to the lights.

Yes. In the house, which, I mean, do we need that? Is it so bad to get up and switch a light switch? Well, so Harry's one is programmed to the lights, but we've got a special light bulb so you can change the colour. That's what we've got. I didn't know that we had this, but obviously the previous owners only just moved in.

We've got that as well. So then after she showed the kids how to do this, the kids are just constantly changing the color. And it looks like we're in Ibiza because it will be a nightclub in Ibiza. Because if people just looking in our window, we got like pink lights, red lights, blue lights. And it's constantly flickering.

And it's just driving me fucking mental, to be honest. So you can link it up to music as well, so it can change with the tempo of the music. I'm not going to lie, I did get home drunk one night with some friends and put a disco on in the front room. All you needed was the wedding DJ for my beta and then you would have been absolutely having it. If only. I wanted him to be my friend. No, this is where I think, like...

I think we've gone too far with technology because at no point ever did I ever think switching the light switch on and off is difficult. Like technology is supposed to make your life easier. Yes. And,

My life is now much more complicated because I'm constantly having to like... Trying to work out. Yeah. Switch on. And then like, yeah, it doesn't understand me. I'm like, switch on the lights, switch on the lights. And then they'll say, then it will say, buongiorno, Martin. And then say, today is Tuesday. Switch on the fucking lights. And then you have to get up and switch them on anyway. And then they come on pink. Yeah.

Well, we were talking earlier about my friend who has an app for everything. So she can close her curtains from her bed. She can, basically, I don't know how, but it controls her car. Well, the other day she lost her phone. So she actually couldn't. Couldn't.

Couldn't even close the curtains. Well, she couldn't. We were at work. She couldn't get in her car to go home. She lost her phone. My God. This is what I mean. I mean, like closing the curtains. Again, it's not something I've ever really thought. And I just think it was just making people so lazy now that you don't even have to close the curtains anymore. No, it is. And it's... What's that film? WALL-E, where they all become...

um they lack bone density because they're so lazy and don't do anything for themselves that's it we are heading that way exactly um i must admit i sort of technology wise like we have only literally just put up the tv in our house and i say that i make it sound like

you know, we just thought, you know, we're just going to stay without TV and stuff. But really, I don't know how to put a TV on a wall. And at the moment, Mrs. R&R's dad is here and he is able to put a TV on a wall. So that's why we've only just put the TV on the wall. So did you have it running or working before it was just on the floor? In the loft. In the loft. It was in the loft. Yeah, because I thought if I put it on the floor, the kids are going to knock that over and it's going to break. Yeah.

So we haven't had a TV for like months. And not only that, in our old house, we lost the TV remote. Oh, no. For, I would say, the last two months of being in the house.

So two months the last, we couldn't find the TV remote. It was only when we moved out, then we found it. And so then a few months in this house and it's been great with no TV. Do the children have...

or are they quite happy to entertain themselves? They, they, I say they have an iPad. It was my iPad and now it's got like a Mickey Mouse plastic case and it's, it's their iPad. Yes. Welcome to parenting. Yeah. But then we, so they were watching that for a bit, but then we stopped that and, and,

We've actually noticed, like, they've, like, started being kids. They, like, play games and stuff. So I was up for not bothering with the TV anymore. I just thought, I can't be bothered with this shit. But now we've got it. So we don't have a TV downstairs, and that's where we spend most of our time during the day. And it's so nice because, yeah, we actually have to talk to each other. Exactly.

Yeah, I know. Something which may sound horrible, but having to talk to each other in the end isn't actually that bad. There's a reason we married. Exactly. OK, what about this? So we did briefly touch on this in our pre-pod chat. You mentioned your watch. Do you have one of those? Do you have a smart watch?

Or just a normal watch? I think it's a smart watch. It's not very smart. It connects. It's a pretty stupid watch. It's a pretty stupid one. It connects to my phone. Right. But I don't do anything with it. It's just that at work, I've then got a digital watch. And if I get a message or anything come through. Yeah.

I can see it without getting my phone off. So you're not one of the like counting steps people. No. See, I wasn't and I thought this was a complete waste of time. However, I recently have taken out life insurance and they give you things for like, like I've got some,

cinema vouchers, for example, you can get a coffee, a coffee shop. And for the more points you get, you get points by doing like exercise. Okay. So now when I'm on my bike, are we riding my bike? Before I just had a Casio because I actually didn't like getting messages and stuff. I found it annoying. So now I'll be on my bike and

And a few times I have nearly crashed my bike because I'm trying to record my outdoor cycle workout. It's like, oh shit, yeah, I nearly just killed myself. But at least I am getting some points for my life insurance. You know, you could set it up before you get on the bike. Yeah, but I always forget. And then I'm cycling and I think, oh, I don't want this to go unmissed. And then I'm trying to find the app on the watch while still cycling.

And like cars like flying past. So, yeah, again, is that making my life easier or is that making my life much more stressful? I do like the idea of that because if there's again, if there's a reward, like we were saying with your reviews, if there's an incentive, you're more likely to do it, aren't you? That is true. However,

If the incentive of when you're trying to record your workout could end up killing you. Quite ironic as well, it's for my life insurance. It's for your life insurance. Would they pay out? At least the insurance will come in handy. On the subject of life insurance, so I have phoned loads of different people. I know everything about life insurance now. If you've got any questions about life insurance, come to me, okay? And like, so one of the main things is they always say,

we'll pay this money if something worse happened to you, etc. And they always say, however, not for suicide. And you think, yep, fair enough. And one insurance broker or whatever said to me, and the good thing about this is that we pay out even for suicide. And I was thinking, oh, brilliant. Okay, so whilst we're talking about suicide, I thought that might be a good time to stop the episode. So,

Obviously, the episode will continue in the Rock and Roll English family membership area where there are obviously lots more podcasts and loads of stuff going on. So make sure you check that out.

the link to which is in the podcast you're listening to. It is the membership area to the podcast in case you didn't know. So quick recap on some of that vocab. So I mentioned at the beginning that I'm trying to play the guilt trip on people about the reviews by saying how sad I am. So when a guilt trip is when you make someone feel guilty, make them feel bad.

I mentioned when Champagne Char said, how about monetary incentive? So monetary, because you couldn't say a money incentive. That would sound strange. You say a monetary incentive. And I said, I'm not made of money. A lovely term to say I haven't got much money.

I also use a nice term saying, if I could, I would. A lovely term to say, you know, exactly that. If it was possible, I would do it. If I could, I would. Champagne Char said her son eats beige food. So like plain food, let's say. That's why he has a margarita pizza. And speaking of pizzas, I said to Champagne Char, what's your go-to pizza? So the first one you would choose is...

And then we spoke about showing someone your phone and we said 30 seconds tops. So maximum. And I said, yes, at a push, meaning like that's like maximum.

The absolute maximum. You're pushing the boundary as much as you can. We also had the term money well spent, which, again, is a quite simple term to understand, but a lovely term. Champagne Char as well said how we are so classy in the UK when we say cafe champagne.

I can't remember how I'm supposed to say that with the terrible English accent. So but she said we are so classy. She also mentioned she lives in a townhouse, which is a house as three.

floor. So the bottom floor, then the first floor and then the second floor. We mentioned how Alexa, my Alexa has lost the plot. So it means it's gone crazy. And we spoke about the light or lights flickering. So kind of going on and off. And also, last but not least, I said I've taken out life insurance. So notice we take out insurance. So if you are travelling and you think I need some travel insurance, then you will take out some travel insurance.

So that's it for this week. I will see you again very soon. But in the meantime, just keep on rocking, baby. Thanks so much for listening to Rock and Roll English. For more great content and to stay up to date, visit rockandrollenglish.com and facebook.com slash rockandrollenglish. We'll catch you next time.