TDS Time Machine | In the Field Pt. 2
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Hey, comedy fans. The funniest comedians in the world are on tour, and you can get tickets to see them live near you. Laugh at the biggest names in comedy, like Otsuko Okatsuka, Chelsea Handler, Jimmy Carr, Kathy Griffin, Matt Matthews, Matt Reif, Sarah Silverman, Sebastian Maniscalco, Stavros Helkias, Wanda Sykes,

and so many more. All kinds of shows, all kinds of venues, all kinds of funny. Head to LiveNation.com slash comedy to get your tickets today. That's LiveNation.com slash comedy. How crispy are the new Deli-Mex crispy quesadillas? Let's see. I'm going to pop one in the microwave. Yeah, Deli-Mex crispy quesadillas are crispy even from a microwave. I can already smell it. Heads up, if you hate loud crunching, you might want to mute.

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America's democracy may not be the strongest, but at least it's the oldest. There seems to be some sort of gerontocracy. We have the oldest leaders among rich countries, and we love all of them. Joe Biden, Donald Trump, this guy. Are there drawbacks to having our leadership with one foot in heaven?

I spoke to Mark Fisher, NeuroPolitics researcher at UC Irvine. We know that brain function tends to deteriorate with aging. One of the first to go of all the cognitive functions is called executive function. It's decision making. I see. And what could be more important for a political leader than decision making? What am I going to have for freaking lunch? I'm president of the United States. What the heck am I going to have for lunch?

That's a hard decision, and I hope that I have a burger for lunch. I guess I've had this

freaky misconception that old people are wiser and smarter than me and it feels like what you're telling me is that that's not true and I should never trust them. Oh I wouldn't say that. I wouldn't say that. No I think that the experience that one gains over the course of a lifetime extraordinarily important but there are some measurable cognitive functions that do begin to decline over the age of 60. So even though you have more experiences you

you are still getting dumber. You know, I'm a neurologist. Dumb is not a word that we use. Okay, all right. I'll say it then. Don't worry. So having a bunch of old brains in charge might be a bit of a problem, but this wise old neurologist actually has a solution. Our Neuropolitics Center, we came out with a recommendation that cognitive testing should be done on all politicians, not just older politicians, all politicians. Woman, man, woman.

Camera, keep it. Unsurprisingly, Trump says he aced his cognitive test already. If you get it in order, you get extra points. An individual is given a number of things to remember, and then after a period of time, three to five minutes, they're asked to repeat that. I mean, those aren't hard things to remember, right? Person, mama, dad.

It's only one part of the exam. Yeah, thank God. And by itself, it doesn't determine a whole lot. I mean, you have to look at the entire exam. And you have to look at someone's personality. I mean, I have a really good personality.

Absolutely. Thank you. But that's not really, that's really not assessed in real cognizance. It doesn't need to be. Without seeing his test results, we can only guess how well or not well Trump's brain is doing. But it did make me curious. Could my brain be president? My name? Grace. My date of birth? June 30th.

1995. This first part of the exam, this isn't scored, so this is just identification material. Okay, God, I would like to be scored on those two, actually, if possible, because I think I got them right. Do you have more difficulties doing everyday activities due to thinking problems? No, I have almost nothing to do on a daily basis. At the bottom of the very last page, write, I have finished on the blank line provided. So this is a test of delayed recall.

Got it. This one is so easy. Can I call my mom to just double check? Last question. In the course of just a few pages, we've covered many cognitive domains. Sir. Did I pass? Let's hear it, brother. Come on. Come on. You got it. Woo! Look! Woo!

Now, if only someone could go to Washington and get our elected leaders to take this test. Okay, fine. I'll do it. Hello. Hey, how you doing? Good to see you. You too. My name's Grace. I'm Maxwell. I'm looking for a congressperson. Well, I am a congressman. So who does, like, your Botox or your work? You look incredible.

I appreciate it. I'm actually 27. Yes, most junior congressperson Maxwell Frost is the only person who would talk to me for this story. So how would you feel about having a cognitive test required for politicians? I don't think we should have that. Okay, why not? You worried you'd fail, dude? What is a cognitive test? For example, I could show you one. Yeah. What are these? A rhino and a harp.

Congratulations, sir. You get to keep your position. They told me that if you screwed this up, that this office would be mine.

I'll be honest, I had to think for just two seconds about what animal that was. Yeah, of course. In this baby politician's view, the issue with politics isn't old brains. It's the lack of young ones. I do think it's an issue that, yeah, young people are as represented. I don't think we should boot out all the old people and just have young people running the country. So you're not ageist? I'm not an ageist. When do you feel like you would retire? I don't know when I would retire, but I do think we need term limits.

Do you think if you stay in Congress for 34 years, you'll be able to bring Congress to term limits?

Because of how this place works, maybe, but my hope is we'll have it way before that. So it's not hopeless. We just need our young politicians to stick around until they'll be able to change the system, however long it takes. You know what? I think I'll vote for you. You can't. Why not? Because I live in Orlando. I represent Orlando, Florida. If you move to Orlando, though. I could go on a paid business trip to Disney World and leave my vote there. Yeah, yeah. That's illegal, too.

Trump's promise in 2016 to bring back manufacturing jobs was a major appeal in the upper Midwest. And in Trump's first year in office, the artist of deals delivered them a masterpiece. Oxconn will invest...

In southeast Wisconsin. Electronics manufacturer Foxconn is opening its first major U.S. factory in Wisconsin, investing $10 billion of their own money to do so. That's right, Foxconn, the Taiwan-based company that's good at making iPhones and great at making their employees jump off buildings. The Foxconn deal in Mount Pleasant was as golden as the shovels Trump brought to the groundbreaking.

I think we can say this is, we can say, the eighth wonder of the world. So to learn more about this eighth wonder of the world, I spoke with Alan Young, the business genius responsible for bringing Foxconn to WizCon. Sing. Love business. Love big business. I love great businessmen. You brought manufacturing.

to Mount Pleasant. What do you love most about Wisconsin? The cheese or the high rate of alcoholism? It turns out Wisconsin actually, to our benefit, was the right choice. And the vision really was to create what we call Wiscon Valley, the $10 billion project slated to create up to 13,000 jobs. All right, high-tech job creation. Local country bumpkin Kelly Gallaher. Must be ecstatic. Foxconn came to town. They promised us the world. Then that...

us because our village officials are morons. - Look lady, I came here to do a feel good puff piece about foreign corporations creating jobs for farmers or whatever, okay? Are you telling me that's not happening? - They promised us 13,000 jobs and a $10 billion investment. We got a few hundred crappy jobs.

We bulldozed 100 homes, moved people out, used eminent domain against them, and except for a few buildings that Foxconn has put there, it's basically empty. Well, you can't fault Foxconn for...

Putting money into this town and trying to make something happen, but they didn't put money in on it Unfortunately the village of Mount Pleasant decided instead of making Foxconn buy the land that they wanted for their factory our part-time village trustees they Said we'll do it for you. We borrowed nearly a billion dollars. So a bunch of village idiots bought

a billion dollars to get Foxconn to come in. Foxconn comes in and goes, "Hey, we can give you guys civilization, take you out of the farms." Well, we like our farms. What was Foxconn promising to build?

Well, first they said they were going to build large screen LCD TVs. Amazing. I love those. A few weeks later, they changed it that they were going to build small LCD screens, the kinds that you get in the car. That's cool. I love those too. I love all screens. Then they announced that they were going to build coffee robots. Okay, but you know what? Who doesn't like coffee? That didn't happen either. And right now, nobody knows what they do inside that building.

Okay. It's 3,000 square acres of land. Do you know how much 3,000 square acres of land is? Of course not. I'm not a dumb farmer. You should really go check it out. Fine, I will. This simple villager wasn't making any sense. Alan and Foxconn assured the residents of Mount Pleasant that it would be bringing a stay-at-the-yard tech hop to its barren farmland. But instead, all Foxconn built was a bunch of roads to nowhere. What the hell? Two

Two empty warehouses and a lame disco ball in the middle of an empty field? F***ing hell. I needed answers. Where the hell is everybody? I was told there was 13,000 jobs. Yeah. Sorry, sir. Just wondering, where are the jobs at? The jobs.

There's 13,000 jobs. This can't be right. And even if there aren't any jobs or products or transparency, surely Foxconn has a plan. I would say that over the past few years, everybody learned a few lessons. I think the storyline is happening, and story is a good one. It really is trailblazing and making pioneering decisions, even though it might not make sense. Even though it makes absolutely no sense. Well, okay, absolutely no sense, but...

- Right now, I think we're in the chapter two or chapter three of the whole thing. - Chapter 11 of the-- - Well, you don't wanna get there. - Right. - Well, the outcome was job creation. You really shouldn't care if you build potato chips or microchips. - Potato chips or microchips, who cares? Just make something. That's what people want, for Foxconn to make something in this factory. - It takes a village. - It takes a village to build a factory that makes nothing.

You got me there. Alan did a great job at showing the very thin line between genius business plan and scam. Okay, I think I see why you're so upset. You got catfished. You know what catfishing is.

Yes, I do. But what-- who benef-- what-- why did they do this? If it's so bad for everybody, why did this happen? Well, it was really Donald Trump. Oh, here we go again. It's the largest failed publicly funded economic development project in Wisconsin history, possibly in U.S. history.

In true Trump fashion, he made a promise, never delivered, and left someone else holding the bag. Was there any way to turn this development disaster around? More breaking news now. Microsoft could be coming to Mount Pleasant. This is a huge win for the village. Microsoft came to town and they announced a $3.3 billion investment project and 2,000 full-time jobs. Okay, 2,000 is quite a step down from 13,000. But those 13,000 jobs were never real. What are you even making there?

It's going to be an AI data center. Wait, but that, if it's an AI center, it's gonna take jobs. They're gonna replace workers, they're gonna end up with less jobs than before. Well, it's better than nothing. Actually, no. Because no jobs will be zero. This will be negative jobs, because they'll be taking other people's jobs. All I know is that these are 2,000 real jobs. Ah, goddamn villagers, it's jobs, man. You guys talk about anything else here?

In business, not everything turns out the way you want it to. But hey, with a little ingenuity and some American can-do spirit, you too could turn 13,000 jobs into 2,000 and put your whole village into debt. Great job.

Hey, comedy fans. The funniest comedians in the world are on tour, and you can get tickets to see them live near you. Laugh at the biggest names in comedy, like Otsuko Okatsuka, Chelsea Handler, Jimmy Carr, Kathy Griffin, Matt Matthews, Matt Reif, Sarah Silverman, Sebastian Maniscalco, Stavros Helkias, Wanda Sykes,

and so many more. All kinds of shows, all kinds of venues, all kinds of funny. Head to LiveNation.com slash comedy to get your tickets today. That's LiveNation.com slash comedy. The following ad is sponsored by Pets Best Insurance Services. Your pet is your bestie. Your therapist, your preferred match. It's easy to love them, even when they sneak your snacks. It's easy to protect them, too, with pet insurance coverage from Pets Best.

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There is no doubt that this election is exhausting, infuriating, and divisive. You're not going to lock up prison! U.S.A.! U.S.A.! But to some, the endless cycle of insults and partisan attacks might actually be a turn-on? That's right. The hottest new fetish is political humiliation. And this correspondent is ready to dive in to see if political shaming is the new sexy.

To find out more about this niche fetish, I traveled to the top spot for political shaming, Tampa, Florida, to speak to two of the top specialists in the field. Goddess Vivian Leigh, a dominatrix who specializes in humiliating liberals, and Goddess Brandon. We all have small penises. A dominatrix who specializes in shaming conservatives using her popular personas, Ivanka Trump and Laura Hilbert. When did you notice that people were asking for this political shaming?

I put up my first video when Trump first went into office. I had this terrible blonde wig that started off with Ivanka. They got a lot of exposure and they just blew up, especially on my phone lines. Requests started rolling in from there and I just kind of leaned into it and kept going with it. So do you think that Trump played a huge part in the growth of this need?

Oh, absolutely. It didn't exist before him. And I don't think it would really exist without him. Right. I mean, who knew that 80-year-old men can make people so horny? Oh, I would count on that to pay my bills. Mm-hmm. So what do conservatives want to be sexually humiliated about? I definitely focus on what I would consider to be, like, the sensitive subjects, like race-based topics, feeling inadequate to black men and wanting that maybe rubbed in their face a little bit. Gay temptation. The fact that a lot of them have...

issues with like women of power. - So what are you saying? Are you saying that rich white men are insecure? - And what turns on WordPress? - American anything camo guns. They go absolutely insane for the Confederate bikini. We often end up discussing a certain politician's part. - Who's the popular one? - Trump's . - Right. - Sometimes it's daddy to sound a stick.

It was time to find out firsthand what to expect from a political humiliation session. So, ring ring, hello. Hello, Troy, how are you? Tell me about you. Um, I am a news anchor. No, no, I'm a little sissy liberal bitch, and I'm calling for you to tell me I'm gonna vote for Daddy Trump. Okay. Okay. I'm...

That was a long line that you gave me. I'm very conservative as is my penis. Stupid, stupid penis. You know what I think you need? What do I need? A strap-on. Oh! That's what I think you need. Like a fanny pack? A big fanny pack. What's in the fanny pack? Penises. Real penises? I'm gonna put you in a cute little American flag diaper and a Trump t-shirt and the best little mega hat a boy could wear.

- Yeah, I have a big fanny pack of penises on my head. And I hate drag queens. They're ruining the world with their fun. - You're just trying to mind your own straight business and these temptations are everywhere. You were once entitled to a wife. - Yeah. - And now all of these femmes running around deciding not to marry white incel men

It's a crime. They need wives and mommies. Say thank you, daddy. Thank you, daddy. For letting me vote for Trump. For letting me vote for Trump.

It's hard to be a straight guy. Do you think that those involved get more knowledge on their own and opposing political views because of your services? I do. I think that I inspire them to want to at least look something up. I mean, their penises are in their hands. I guess it would be awesome if you could take a step back and think to yourself, like, hmm...

Are my thoughts and opinions obnoxious and hateful? Well, I mean, you're dealing with shame. So maybe you have changed them, but they're ashamed to tell you. They're just not going to tell me. Exactly. Quietly shamed.

I needed to understand more about this fetish from a psychological standpoint. So I brought sex expert Dr. Justin Lee Miller to the Museum of Sex to make him feel at home and ask if he knew why this fetish was the one thing that crossed the political aisle right now. There's some trauma connected to our politics. And something that happens in our fantasies is that it provides us opportunity to take control of a previous trauma. So there can be something in

empowering about taking something like shame or humiliation and then having complete control over it. There's also some sort of humanizing element that happens when people engage in this kind of kinky behavior. People can tap into deeper elements and aspects of the self. Do you think that this fetish could help the country come together? No pun intended. I don't have any data that could necessarily say that's the case.

And since there is no official data on this topic, it's up to me to do the research to find out if political humiliation is the solution to America's problems just in time for the election. I really bet you more of a purple. That's too hard. Woo!

Okay. You go on to the other one. I don't know if I'm a slut boy for that policy or that policy. If you would just let me speak. Let me finish. Let me finish. Let me finish.

What is your point? Because you've been going in circles. Did my data result in a fix for the election? No. You're not done talking. Was I turned on? I'm not sure. You know what? Maybe I should just vote independent. What? Emotions have been running high. No, no, no. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You're throwing away your vote. Okay. Oh, actually, you know what? We might be getting somewhere with this. But I guess no matter what happens in November, in this country, there will always be plenty of shame.

Hey, comedy fans. The funniest comedians in the world are on tour, and you can get tickets to see them live near you. Laugh at the biggest names in comedy, like Otsuko Okatsuka, Chelsea Handler, Jimmy Carr, Kathy Griffin, Matt Matthews, Matt Reif, Sarah Silverman, Sebastian Maniscalco, Stavros Helkias, Wanda Sykes,

and so many more. All kinds of shows, all kinds of venues, all kinds of funny. Head to LiveNation.com slash comedy to get your tickets today. That's LiveNation.com slash comedy. How crispy are the new Deli-Mex crispy quesadillas? Let's see. I'm going to pop one in the microwave. Yeah, Deli-Mex crispy quesadillas are crispy even from a microwave. I can already smell it. Heads up, if you hate loud crunching, you might want to mute.

Mmm, so crispy. Like, barely hear myself think crispy. These should come with a warning. Mmm. If this crispiness is making you hungry, get to your closest grocery store for Deli Mac's crispy quesadillas in the frozen aisle.

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